textfiles/stories/gulliver.txt

 LIBRARY OF THE FUTURE (R) First Edition Ver. 4.02 
 Gulliver's Travels                                               Swift Jonathan        

                                                                            
                                                                            
                                                                            
                                                                            
                                      1726                                  
                                                                            
                                                                            
                               GULLIVER'S TRAVELS                           
                                                                            
                               by Jonathan Swift                            
                                                                            
                                                                            
                                                                            
                                                                            
                                                                            
                                                                            
                                                                            
                                                                            
                                                                            
 Electronically Enhanced Text (c) Copyright 1991, World Library, Inc.       
                                                                            
LETTER_TO_SYMPSON                                                           
  A LETTER FROM CAPTAIN GULLIVER TO HIS COUSIN SYMPSON                      
-                                                                           
  I hope you will be ready to own publicly, whenever you shall be           
called to it, that by your great and frequent urgency you prevailed on      
me to publish a very loose and uncorrect account of my travels; with        
direction to hire some young gentlemen of either university to put          
them in order, and correct the style, as my cousin Dampier did by my        
advice, in his book called A Voyage round the World. But I do not           
remember I gave you power to consent that any thing should be omitted,      
and much less that any thing should be inserted: therefore, as to           
the latter, I do here renounce every thing of that kind;                    
particularly a paragraph about her Majesty the late Queen Anne, of          
most pious and glorious memory; although I did reverence and esteem         
her more than any of human species. But you, or your interpolator,          
ought to have considered, that as it was not my inclination, so was it      
not decent to praise any animal of our composition before my master         
Houyhnhnm: and besides the fact was altogether false; for to my             
knowledge, being in England during some part of her Majesty's reign,        
she did govern by a chief minister; nay, even by two successively; the      
first whereof was the Lord of Godolphin, and the second the Lord of         
Oxford; so that you have made me say the thing that was not. Likewise,      
in the account of the Academy of Projectors, and several passages of        
my discourse to my master Houyhnhnm, you have either omitted some           
material circumstances, or minced or changed them in such a manner,         
that I do hardly know my own work. When I formerly hinted to you            
something of this in a letter, you were pleased to answer that you          
were afraid of giving offense; that people in power were very watchful      
over the press, and apt not only to interpret, but to punish every          
thing which looked like an innuendo (as I think you called it). But         
pray, how could that which I spoke so many years ago, and at about          
five thousand leagues distance, in another reign, be applied to any of      
the Yahoos who now are said to govern the herd; especially at a time        
when I little thought on or feared the unhappiness of living under          
them? Have not I the most reason to complain, when I see these very         
Yahoos carried by Houyhnhnms in a vehicle, as if these were brutes,         
and those the rational creatures? And indeed, to avoid so monstrous         
and detestable a sight was one principal motive of my retirement            
hither.                                                                     
  Thus much I thought proper to tell you in relation to yourself,           
and to the trust I reposed in you.                                          
  I do in the next place complain of my own great want of judgement,        
in being prevailed upon by the entreaties and false reasonings of           
you and some others, very much against my own opinion, to suffer my         
travels to be published. Pray bring to your mind how often I desired        
you to consider, when you insisted on the motive of public good;            
that the Yahoos were a species of animals utterly incapable of              
amendment by precepts or examples: and so it hath proved; for               
instead of seeing a full stop put to all abuses and corruptions, at         
least in this little island, as I had reason to expect: behold,             
after above six months warning, I cannot learn that my book hath            
produced one single effect according to my intentions: I desired you        
would let me know by a letter, when party and faction were                  
extinguished; judges learned and upright; pleaders honest and               
modest, with some tincture of common sense; and Smithfield blazing          
with pyramids of lawbooks; the young nobility's education entirely          
changed; the physicians banished; the female Yahoos abounding in            
virtue, honour, truth and good sense; courts and levees of great            
ministers thoroughly weeded and swept; wit, merit and learning              
rewarded; all disgracers of the press in prose and verse condemned          
to eat nothing but their own cotton, and quench their thirst with           
their own ink. These and a thousand other reformations, I firmly            
counted upon by your encouragement; as indeed they were plainly             
deducible from the precepts delivered in my book. And it must be owned      
that seven months were a sufficient time to correct every vice and          
folly to which Yahoos are subject, if their natures had been capable        
of the least disposition to virtue or wisdom: yet so far have you been      
from answering my expectation in any of your letters, that on the           
contrary you are loading our carrier every week with libels, and keys,      
and reflections, and memoirs, and second parts; wherein I see myself        
accused of reflecting upon great states-folk, of degrading human            
nature (for so they have still the confidence to style it), and of          
abusing the female sex. I find likewise that the writers of those           
bundles are not agreed among themselves; for some of them will not          
allow me to be author of my own travels; and others make me author          
of books to which I am wholly a stranger.                                   
  I find likewise that your printer hath been so careless as to             
confound the times, and mistake the dates of my several voyages and         
returns; neither assigning the true year, or the true month, or day of      
the month: and I hear the original manuscript is all destroyed since        
the publication of my book. Neither have I any copy left: however I         
have sent you some corrections, which you may insert, if ever there         
should be a second edition: and yet I cannot stand to them, but             
shall leave that matter to my judicious and candid readers, to              
adjust it as they please.                                                   
  I hear some of our sea-Yahoos find fault with my sea-language, as         
not proper in many parts, nor now in use. I cannot help it. In my           
first voyages, while I was young, I was instructed by the oldest            
mariners, and learned to speak as they did. But I have since found          
that the sea-Yahoos are apt, like the land ones, to become new-fangled      
in their words, which the latter change every year, insomuch as I           
remember upon each return to my own country their old dialect was so        
altered that I could hardly understand the new. And I observe, when         
any Yahoo comes from London out of curiosity visit me at my own house,      
we neither of us are able to deliver our conceptions in a manner            
intelligible to the other.                                                  
                                            {LETTER_TO_SYMPSON ^paragraph 5}
  If the censure of Yahoos could any way affect me, I should have           
great reason to complain that some of them are so bold as to think          
my book of travels a mere fiction out of my own brain, and have gone        
so far as to drop hints that the Houyhnhnms and Yahoos have no more         
existence than the inhabitants of Utopia.                                   
  Indeed I must confess, that as to the people of Lilliput,                 
Brobdingrag (for so the word should have been spelt, and not                
erroneously Brobdingnag), and Laputa, I have never yet heard of any         
Yahoo so presumptuous as to dispute their being, or the facts I have        
related concerning them; because the truth immediately strikes every        
reader with conviction. And is there less probability in my account of      
the Houyhnhnms or Yahoos, when it is manifest as to the latter,             
there are so many thousands even in this city, who only differ from         
their brother brutes in Houyhnhnm-land, because they use a sort of a        
jabber, and do not go naked? I wrote for their amendment, and not           
their approbation. The united praise of the whole race would be of          
less consequence to me than the neighing of those two degenerate            
Houyhnhnms I keep in my stable; because from these, degenerate as they      
are, I still improve in some virtues, without any mixture of vice.          
  Do these miserable animals presume to think that I am so far              
degenerated as to defend my veracity? Yahoo as I am, it is well             
known through all Houyhnhnm-land, that by the instructions and example      
of my illustrious master I was able in the compass of two years             
(although I confess with the utmost difficulty) to remove that              
infernal habit of lying, shuffling, deceiving, and equivocating, so         
deeply rooted in the very souls of all my species, especially the           
Europeans.                                                                  
  I have other complaints to make upon this vexatious occasion; but         
I forbear troubling myself or you any further. I must freely                
confess, that since my last return some corruptions of my Yahoo nature      
have revived in me by conversing with a few of your species, and            
particularly those of my own family, by an unavoidable necessity; else      
I should never have attempted so absurd a project as that of reforming      
the Yahoo race in this kingdom; but I have now done with all visionary      
schemes for ever.                                                           
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April 2, 1727.                                                              
                                                                            
PUBLISHERS_LETTER                                                           
  THE PUBLISHER TO THE READER                                               
-                                                                           
  The author of these Travels, Mr. Lemuel Gulliver, is my ancient           
and intimate friend; there is likewise some relation between us by the      
mother's side. About three years ago Mr. Gulliver, growing weary of         
the concourse of curious people coming to him at his house in Redriff,      
made a small purchase of land, with a convenient house, near Newark in      
Nottinghamshire, his native country; where he now lives retired, yet        
in good esteem among his neighbors.                                         
  Although Mr. Gulliver was born in Nottinghamshire, where his              
father dwelt, yet I have heard him say his family came from                 
Oxfordshire; to confirm which, I have observed in the churchyard at         
Banbury, in that county, several tombs and monuments of the Gullivers.      
  Before he quitted Redriff, he left the custody of the following           
papers in my hands, with the liberty to dispose of them as I should         
think fit. I have carefully perused them three times: the style is          
very plain and simple; and the only fault I find is, that the               
author, after the manner of travelers, is a little too circumstantial.      
There is an air of truth apparent through the whole; and indeed the         
author was so distinguished for his veracity, that it became a sort of      
proverb among his neighbors at Redriff, when any one affirmed a thing,      
to say it was as true as if Mr. Gulliver had spoke it.                      
  By the advice of several worthy persons, to whom, with the                
author's permission, I communicated these papers, I now venture to          
send them into the world, hoping they may be at least, for some             
time, a better entertainment to our young noblemen than the common          
scribbles of politics and party.                                            
  This volume would have been at least twice as large, if I had not         
made bold to strike out innumerable passages relating to the winds and      
tides, as well as to the variations and bearings in the several             
voyages; together with the minute descriptions of the management of         
the ship in storms, in the style of sailors: likewise the account of        
the longitudes and latitudes; wherein I have reason to apprehend            
that Mr. Gulliver may be a little dissatisfied: but I was resolved          
to fit the work as much as possible to the general capacity of              
readers. However, if my own ignorance in sea-affairs shall have led me      
to commit some mistakes, I alone am answerable for them: and if any         
traveler hath a curiosity to see the whole work at large, as it came        
from the hand of the author, I shall be ready to gratify him.               
                                            {PUBLISHERS_LETTER ^paragraph 5}
  As for any further particulars relating to the author, the reader         
will receive satisfaction from the first pages of the book.                 
-                                                                           
                                          Richard Sympson.                  
                                                                            
                                                                            
                                                                            
                                                                            
                                                                            
                                                                            
                                                                            
                                                                            
                                                                            
                                     PART I                                 
                                                                            
                              A VOYAGE TO LILLIPUT                          
                                                                            
                                                                            
                                  (SEE PLATE 1)                             
                                                                            
P_1|CH_1                                                                    
  CHAPTER I                                                                 
-                                                                           
  My father had a small estate in Nottinghamshire; I was the third          
of five sons. He sent me to Emanuel College in Cambridge at fourteen        
years old, where I resided three years, and applied myself close to my      
studies: but the charge of maintaining me (although I had a very            
scanty allowance) being too great for a narrow fortune, I was bound         
apprentice to Mr. James Bates, an eminent surgeon in London, with whom      
I continued four years; and my father now and then sending me small         
sums of money, I laid them out in learning navigation, and other parts      
of the mathematics, useful to those who intend to travel, as I              
always believed it would be some time or other my fortune to do.            
When I left Mr. Bates, I went down to my father; where, by the              
assistance of him and my uncle John, and some other relations, I got        
forty pounds, and a promise of thirty pounds a year to maintain me          
at Leyden: there I studied physic two years and seven months,               
knowing it would be useful in long voyages.                                 
  Soon after my return from Leyden, I was recommended, by my good           
master Mr. Bates, to be surgeon to the Swallow, Captain Abraham             
Pannell commander; with whom I continued three years and a half,            
making a voyage or two into the Levant, and some other parts. When I        
came back, I resolved to settle in London, to which Mr. Bates, my           
master, encouraged me, and by him I was recommended to several              
patients. I took part of a small house in the Old Jury; and being           
advised to alter my condition, I married Mrs. Mary Burton, second           
daughter to Mr. Edmund Burton, hosier, in Newgate-street, with whom         
I received four hundred pounds for a portion.                               
  But, my good master Bates dying in two years after, and I having few      
friends, my business began to fail; for my conscience would not suffer      
me to imitate the bad practice of too many among my brethren. Having        
therefore consulted with my wife, and some of my acquaintance, I            
determined to go again to sea. I was surgeon successively in two            
ships, and made several voyages, for six years, to the East and West        
Indies, by which I got some addition to my fortune. My hours of             
leisure I spent in reading the best authors, ancient and modern, being      
always provided with a good number of books; and when I was ashore, in      
observing the manners and dispositions of the people, well as learning      
their language, wherein I had a great facility by the strength of my        
memory.                                                                     
  The last of these voyages not proving very fortunate, I grew weary        
of the sea, and intended to stay at home with my wife and family. I         
removed from the Old jury to Fetter-Lane, and from thence to Wapping        
hoping to get business among the sailors; but it would not turn to          
account. After three years expectation that things would mend, I            
accepted an advantageous offer from Captain William Prichard, master        
of the Antelope, who was making a voyage to the South-Sea. We set sail      
from Bristol May 4, 1699, and our voyage at first was very prosperous.      
  It would not be proper, for some reasons, to trouble the reader with      
the particulars of our adventures in those seas: let it suffice to          
inform him, that in our passage from thence to the East Indies, we          
were driven by a violent storm to the northwest of Van Diemen's             
Land. By an observation, we found ourselves in the latitude of 30           
degrees 2 minutes south. Twelve of our crew were dead by immoderate         
labor and ill food, the rest were in a very weak condition. On the          
fifth of November, which was the beginning of summer in those parts,        
the weather being very hazy, the seamen spied a rock, within half a         
cable's length of the ship; but the wind was so strong, that we were        
driven directly upon it, and immediately split. Six of the crew, of         
whom I was one, having let down the boat into the sea, made a shift to      
get clear of the ship, and the rock. We rowed by my computation             
about three leagues, till we were able to work no longer, being             
already spent with labor while we were in the ship. We therefore            
trusted ourselves to the mercy of the waves, and in about half an hour      
the boat was overset by a sudden flurry from the north. What became of      
my companions in the boat, as well as of those who escaped on the           
rock, or were left in the vessel, I cannot tell; but conclude they          
were all lost. For my own part, I swam as fortune directed me, and was      
pushed forward by wind and tide. I often let my legs drop, and could        
feel no bottom: but when I was almost gone, and able to struggle no         
longer, I found myself within my depth; and by this time the storm was      
much abated. The declivity was so small, that I walked near a mile          
before I got to the shore, which I conjectured was about eight o'clock      
in the evening. I then advanced forward near half a mile, but could         
not discover any sign of houses or inhabitants; at least I was in so        
weak a condition, that I did not observe them. I was extremely              
tired, and with that, and the heat of the weather, and about half a         
pint of brandy that I drank as I left the ship, I found myself much         
inclined to sleep. I lay down on the grass, which was very short and        
soft, where I slept sounder than ever I remember to have done in my         
life, and, as I reckoned, above nine hours; for when I awakened, it         
was just daylight. I attempted to rise, but was not able to stir            
for, as I happened to he on my back, I found my arms and legs were          
strongly fastened on each side to the ground; and my hair, which was        
long and thick, tied down in the same manner. I likewise felt               
several slender ligatures across my body, from my armpits to my             
thighs. I could only look upwards; the sun began to grow hot, and           
the light offended my eyes. I heard a confused noise about me, but          
in the posture I lay, could see nothing except the sky. In a little         
time I felt something alive moving on my left leg, which advancing          
gently forward over my breast, came almost up to my chin; when bending      
my eyes downwards as much as I could, I perceived it to be a human          
creature not six inches high, with a bow and arrow in his hands, and a      
quiver at his back. In the meantime, I felt at least forty more of the      
same kind (as I conjectured) following the first. I was in the              
utmost astonishment, and roared so loud, that they all ran back in a        
fright; and some of them, as I was afterwards told, were hurt with the      
falls they got by leaping from my sides upon the ground. However, they      
soon returned, and one of them, who ventured so far as to get a full        
sight of my face, lifting up his hands and eyes by way of                   
admiration, cried out in a shrill but distinct voice, Hekinah degul:        
the others repeated the same words several times, but I then knew           
not what they meant. I lay all this while, as the reader may                
believe, in great uneasiness: at length, struggling to get loose, I         
had the fortune to break the strings, and wrench out the pegs that          
fastened my left arm to the ground; for, by lifting it up to my             
face, I discovered the methods they had taken to bind me, and at the        
same time, with a violent pull, which gave me excessive pain, I a           
little loosened the strings that tied down my hair on the left side,        
so that I was just able to turn my head about two inches. But the           
creatures ran off a second time, before I could seize them;                 
whereupon there was a great shout in a very shrill accent, and after        
it ceased, I heard one of them cry aloud, Tolgo phonac; when in an          
instant I felt above a hundred arrows discharged on my left hand,           
which pricked me like so many needles; and besides they shot another        
flight into the air, as we do bombs in Europe, whereof many, I              
suppose, fell on my body (though I felt them not) and some on my face,      
which I immediately covered with my left hand. When this shower of          
arrows was over, I fell a groaning with grief and pain, and then            
striving again to get loose, they discharged another volley larger          
than the first, and some of them attempted with spears to stick me          
in the sides; but, by good luck, I had on me a buff jerkin, which they      
could not pierce. I thought it the most prudent method to lie still,        
and my design was to continue so till night, when, my left hand             
being already loose, I could easily free myself: and as for the             
inhabitants, I had reason to believe I might be a match for the             
greatest armies they could bring against me, if they were all of the        
same size with him that I saw. But fortune disposed otherwise of me.        
When the people observed I was quiet, they discharged no more               
arrows; but, by the noise I heard, I knew their numbers increased; and      
about four yards from me, over against my right ear, I heard a              
knocking for above an hour, like that of people at work; when               
turning my head that way, as well as the pegs and strings would permit      
me, I saw a stage erected, about a foot and a half from the ground,         
capable of holding four of the inhabitants, with two or three               
ladders to mount it: from whence one of them, who seemed to be a            
person of quality, made me a long speech, whereof I understood not one      
syllable. But I should have mentioned, that before the principal            
person began his oration, he cried out three times, Langro dehul san        
(these words and the former were afterwards repeated and explained          
to me). Whereupon immediately about fifty of the inhabitants came, and      
cut the strings that fastened the left side of my head, which gave          
me the liberty of turning it to the right, and of observing the person      
and gesture of him that was to speak. He appeared to be of a middle         
age, and taller than any of the other three who attended him,               
whereof one was a page that held up his train, and seemed to be             
somewhat longer than my middle finger; the other two stood one on each      
side to support him. He acted every part of an orator, and I could          
observe many periods of threatenings, and others of promises, pity,         
and kindness. I answered in a few words, but in the most submissive         
manner, lifting up my left hand and both my eyes to the sun, as             
calling him for a witness; and being almost famished with hunger,           
having not eaten a morsel for some hours before I left the ship, I          
found the demands of nature so strong upon me, that I could not             
forbear showing my impatience (perhaps against the strict rules of          
decency) by putting my finger frequently on my mouth, to signify            
that I wanted food. The Hurgo (for so they call a great lord, as I          
afterwards learned) understood me very well. He descended from the          
stage, and commanded that several ladders should be applied to my           
sides, on which above a hundred of the inhabitants mounted, and walked      
towards my mouth, laden with baskets full of meat, which had been           
provided, and sent thither by the King's orders, upon the first             
intelligence he received of me. I observed there was the flesh of           
several animals, but could not distinguish them by the taste. There         
were shoulders, legs, and loins, shaped like those of mutton, and very      
well dressed, but smaller than the wings of a lark. I ate them by           
two or three at a mouthful, and took three loaves at a time, about the      
bigness of musket bullets. They supplied me as they could, showing a        
thousand marks of wonder and astonishment at my bulk and appetite. I        
then made another sign that I wanted drink. They found by my eating         
that a small quantity would not suffice me, and being a most ingenious      
people, they slung up with great dexterity one of their largest             
hogsheads, then rolled it toward my hand, and beat out the top; I           
drank it off at a draught, which I might well do, for it did not            
hold half a pint, and tasted like a small wine of Burgundy, but much        
more delicious. They brought me a second hogshead, which I drank in         
the same manner, and made signs for more, but they had none to give         
me. When I had performed these wonders, they shouted for joy, and           
danced upon my breast, repeating several times as they did at first,        
Hekinah degul. They made me a sign that I should throw down the two         
hogsheads, but first warning the people below to stand out of the way,      
crying aloud, Borach mivola, and when they saw the vessels in the air,      
there was a universal shout of Hekinah degul. I confess I was often         
tempted, while they were passing backwards and forwards on my body, to      
seize forty or fifty of the first that came in my reach, and dash them      
against the ground. But the remembrance of what I had felt, which           
probably might not be the worst they could do, and the promise of           
honor I made them, for so I interpreted my submissive behavior, soon        
drove out these imaginations. Besides, I now considered myself as           
bound by the laws of hospitality to a people who had treated me with        
so much expense and magnificence. However, in my thoughts I could           
not sufficiently wonder at the intrepidity of these diminutive              
mortals, who dare venture to mount and walk upon my body, while one of      
my hands was at liberty, without trembling at the very sight of so          
prodigious a creature as I must appear to them. After some time,            
when they observed that I made no more demands for meat, there              
appeared before me a person of high rank from his Imperial Majesty.         
His Excellency, having mounted on the small of my right leg,                
advanced forwards up to my face, with about a dozen of his retinue.         
And producing his credentials under the Signet Royal, which he applied      
close to my eyes, spoke about ten minutes, without any signs of anger,      
but with a kind of determinate resolution; often pointing forwards,         
which, as I afterwards found, was towards the capital city, about half      
a mile distant, whither it was agreed by his Majesty in council that I      
must be conveyed. I answered in few words, but to no purpose, and made      
a sign with my hand that was loose, putting it to the other (but            
over his Excellency's head, for fear of hurting him or his train)           
and then to my own head and body, to signify that I desired my              
liberty. It appeared that he understood me well enough, for he shook        
his head by way of disapprobation, and held his hand in a posture to        
show that I must be carried as a prisoner. However, he made other           
signs to let me understand that I should have meat and drink enough,        
and very good treatment. Whereupon I once more thought of attempting        
to break my bonds, but again, when I felt the smart of their arrows         
upon my face and hands, which were all in blisters, and many of the         
darts still sticking in them, and observing likewise that the number        
of my enemies increased, I gave tokens to let them know that they           
might do with me what they pleased. Upon this the Hurgo and his             
train withdrew with much civility and cheerful countenances. Soon           
after I heard a general shout, with frequent repetitions of the words,      
Peplom selan, and I felt great numbers of the people on my left side        
relaxing the cords to such a degree, that I was able to turn upon my        
right, and to ease myself with making water; which I very                   
plentifully did, to the great astonishment of the who conjecturing          
by my motions what I was going to do, immediately opened to the             
right and left on that side, to avoid the torrent which fell with such      
noise and violence from me. But before this, they had daubed my face        
and both my hands with a sort of ointment very pleasant to the              
smell, which in a few minutes removed all the smart of their arrows.        
These circumstances, added to the refreshment I had received by             
their victuals and drink, which were very nourishing, disposed me to        
sleep. I slept about eight hours, as I was afterwards assured; and          
it was no wonder, for the physicians, by the Emperor's order, had           
mingled a sleepy potion in the hogsheads of wine.                           
                                                     {P_1|CH_1 ^paragraph 5}
  It seems that upon the first moment I was discovered sleeping on the      
ground after my landing, the Emperor had early notice of it by an           
express; and determined in council that I should be tied in the manner      
I have related (which was done in the night while I slept), that            
plenty of meat and drink should be sent me, and a machine prepared          
to carry me to the capital city.                                            
  This resolution perhaps may appear very bold and dangerous, and I am      
confident would not be imitated by any prince in Europe on the like         
occasion; however, in my opinion, it was extremely prudent, as well as      
generous. For supposing these people had endeavored to kill me with         
their spears and arrows while I was asleep, I should certainly have         
awakened with the first sense of smart, which might so far have roused      
my rage and strength, as to have enabled me to break the strings            
wherewith I was tied; after which, as they were not able to make            
resistance, so they could expect no mercy.                                  
  These people are most excellent mathematicians, and arrived to great      
perfection in mechanics by the countenance and encouragement of the         
Emperor, who is a renowned patron of learning. This prince has several      
machines fixed on wheels for the carriage of trees and other great          
weights. He often builds his largest men of war, whereof some are nine      
feet long, in the woods where the timber grows, and has them carried        
on these engines three or four hundred yards to the sea. Five               
hundred carpenters and engineers were immediately set at work to            
prepare the greatest engine they had. It was a frame of wood raised         
three inches from the ground, about seven feet long and four wide,          
moving upon twenty-two wheels. The shout I heard was upon the               
arrival of this engine, which it seems set out in four hours after          
my landing. It was brought parallel to me as I lay. But the                 
principal difficulty was to raise and place me in this vehicle. Eighty      
poles, each of one foot high, were erected for this purpose, and            
very strong cords of the bigness of packthread were fastened by             
hooks to many bandages, which the workmen had girt round my neck, my        
hands, my body, and my legs. Nine hundred of the strongest men were         
employed to draw up these cords by many pulleys fastened on the poles,      
and thus, in less than three hours, I was raised and slung into the         
engine, and there tied fast. All this I was told, for while the             
whole operation was performing, I lay in a profound sleep, by the           
force of that soporiferous medicine infused into my liquor. Fifteen         
hundred of the Emperor's largest horses, each about four inches and         
a half high, were employed to draw me towards the metropolis, which,        
as I said, was half a mile distant.                                         
  About four hours after we began our journey, I awaked by a very           
ridiculous accident; for the carriage being stopped a while to              
adjust something that was out of order, two or three of the young           
natives had the curiosity to see how I looked when I was asleep;            
they climbed up into the engine, and advancing very softly to my face,      
one of them, an officer in the Guards, put the sharp end of his             
half-pike a good way up into my left nostril, which tickled my nose         
like a straw, and made me sneeze violently: whereupon they stole off        
unperceived, and it was three weeks before I knew the cause of my           
awaking so suddenly. We made a long march the remaining part of that        
day, and rested at night with five hundred guards on each side of           
me, half with torches, and half with bows and arrows, ready to shoot        
me if I should offer to stir. The next morning at sunrise we continued      
our march, and arrived within two hundred yards of the city gates           
about noon. The Emperor, and all his court, came out to meet us; but        
his great officers would by no means suffer his Majesty to endanger         
his person by mounting on my body.                                          
  At the place where the carriage stopped, there stood an ancient           
temple, esteemed to be the largest in the whole kingdom, which              
having been polluted some years before by an unnatural murder, was,         
according to the zeal of those people, looked on as profane, and            
therefore had been applied to common uses, and all the ornaments and        
furniture carried away. In this edifice it was determined I should          
lodge. The great gate fronting to the north was about four feet             
high, and almost two feet wide, through which I could easily creep. On      
each side of the gate was a small window not above six inches from the      
ground: into that on the left side, the King's smiths conveyed              
fourscore and eleven chains, like those that hang to a lady's watch in      
Europe, and almost as large, which were locked to my left leg with six      
and thirty padlocks. Over against this temple, on the other side of         
the great highway, at twenty feet distance, there was a turret at           
least five feet high. Here the Emperor ascended with many principal         
lords of his court, to have an opportunity of viewing me, as I was          
told, for I could not see them. It was reckoned that above a hundred        
thousand inhabitants came out of the town upon the same errand; and in      
spite of my guards, I believe there could not be fewer than ten             
thousand, at several times, who mounted upon my body by the help of         
ladders. But a proclamation was soon issued to forbid it upon pain          
of death. When the workmen found it was impossible for me to break          
loose, they cut all the strings that bound me; whereupon I rose up          
with as melancholy a disposition as ever I had in my life. But the          
noise and astonishment of the people at seeing me rise and walk, are        
not to be expressed. The chains that held my left leg were about two        
yards long, and gave me not only the liberty of walking backwards           
and forwards in a semi-circle; but, being fixed within four inches          
of the gate, allowed me to creep in, and lie at my full length in           
the temple.                                                                 
                                                                            
P_1|CH_2                                                                    
  CHAPTER II                                                                
-                                                                           
  When I found myself on my feet, I looked about me, and must               
confess I never beheld a more entertaining prospect. The country round      
appeared like a continued garden, and the inclosed fields, which            
were generally forty feet square, resembled so many beds of flowers.        
These fields were intermingled with woods of half a sting, and the          
tallest trees, as I could judge, appeared to be seven feet high. I          
viewed the town on my left hand, which looked like the painted scene        
of a city in a theatre.                                                     
  I had been for some hours extremely pressed by the necessities of         
nature; which was no wonder, it being almost two days since I had last      
unburdened myself. I was under great difficulties between urgency           
and shame. The best expedient I could think of, was to creep into my        
house, which I accordingly did; and shutting the gate after me, I went      
as far as the length of my chain would suffer, and discharged my            
body of that uneasy load. But this was the only time I was ever guilty      
of so uncleanly an action; for which I cannot but hope the candid           
reader will give some allowance, after he has maturely and impartially      
considered my case, and the distress I was in. From this time my            
constant practice was, as soon as I rose, to perform that business          
in open air, at the full extent of my chain, and due care was taken         
every morning before company came, that the offensive matter should be      
carried off in wheelbarrows, by two servants appointed for that             
purpose. I would not have dwelt so long upon a circumstance, that           
perhaps at first sight may appear not very momentous, if I had not          
thought it necessary to justify my character in point of cleanliness        
to the world; which I am told some of my maligners have been                
pleased, upon this and other occasions, to call in question.                
  When this adventure was at an end, I came back out of my house,           
having occasion for fresh air. The Emperor was already descended            
from the tower, and advancing on horseback towards me, which had            
like to have cost him dear; for the beast, though very well trained,        
yet wholly unused to such a sight, which appeared as if a mountain          
moved before him, he reared up on his hinder feet: but that prince,         
who is an excellent horseman, kept his seat, till his attendants ran        
in, and held the bridle, while his Majesty had time to dismount.            
When he alighted, he surveyed me round with great admiration, but kept      
without the length of my chain. He ordered his cooks and butlers,           
who were already prepared, to give me victuals and drink, which they        
pushed forward in a sort of vehicle upon wheels till I could reach          
them. I took these vehicles, and soon emptied them all; twenty of them      
were filled with meat, and ten with liquor; each of the former              
afforded me two or three good mouthfuls, and I emptied the liquor of        
ten vessels, which was contained in earthen vials, into one vehicle,        
drinking it off at a draught; and so I did with the rest. The Empress,      
and young Princes of the blood, of both sexes, attended by many             
ladies, sat at some distance in their chairs; but upon the accident         
that happened to the Emperor's horse, they alighted, and came near his      
person, which I am now going to describe. He is taller by almost the        
breadth of my nail than any of his court, which alone is enough to          
strike an awe into the beholders. His features are strong and               
masculine, with an Austrian lip and arched nose, his complexion olive,      
his countenance erect, his body and limbs well proportioned, all his        
motions graceful, and his deportment majestic. He was then past his         
prime, being twenty-eight years and three quarters old, of which he         
had reigned about seven, in great felicity, and generally                   
victorious. For the better convenience of beholding him, I lay on my        
side, so that my face was parallel to his, and he stood but three           
yards off: however, I have had him since many times in my hand, and         
therefore cannot be deceived in the description. His dress was very         
plain and simple, and the fashion of it between the Asiatic and the         
European; but he had on his head a light helmet of gold, adorned            
with jewels, and a plume on the crest. He held his sword drawn in           
his hand, to defend himself, if I should happen to break loose; it was      
almost three inches long, the hilt and scabbard were gold enriched          
with diamonds. His voice was shrill, but very clear and articulate,         
and I could distinctly hear it when I stood up. The ladies and              
courtiers were all most magnificently clad, so that the spot they           
stood upon seemed to resemble a petticoat spread on the ground,             
embroidered with figures of gold and silver. His Imperial Majesty           
spoke often to me, and I returned answers, but neither of us could          
understand a syllable. There were several of his priests and lawyers        
present (as I conjectured by their habits) who were commanded to            
address themselves to me, and I spoke to them in as many languages          
as I had the least smattering of, which were High and Low Dutch,            
Latin, French, Spanish, Italian, and Lingua Franca; but all to no           
purpose. After about two hours the court retired, and I was left            
with a strong guard, to prevent the impertinence, and probably the          
malice of the rabble, who were very impatient to crowd about me as          
near as they dare, and some of them had the impudence to shoot their        
arrows at me as I sat on the ground by the door of my house, whereof        
one very narrowly missed my left eye. But the colonel ordered six of        
the ringleaders to be seized, and thought no punishment so proper as        
to deliver them bound into my hands, which some of his soldiers             
accordingly did, pushing them forwards with the butt-ends of their          
pikes into my reach; I took them all in my right hand, put five of          
them into my coat pocket, and as to the sixth, I made a countenance as      
if I would eat him alive. The poor man squalled terribly, and the           
colonel and his officers were in much pain, especially when they saw        
me take out my penknife: but I soon put them out of fear; for, looking      
mildly, and immediately cutting the strings he was bound with, I set        
him gently on the ground, and away he ran. I treated the rest in the        
same manner, taking them one by one out of my pocket, and I observed        
both the soldiers and people were highly obliged at this mark of my         
clemency, which was represented very much to my advantage at court.         
  Towards night I with some difficulty got into my house, where I           
lay on the ground, and continued to do so about a fortnight; during         
which time the Emperor gave orders to have a bed prepared for me.           
Six hundred beds of the common measure were brought in carriages,           
and worked up in my house; a hundred and fifty of their beds sewn           
together made up the breadth and length, and these were four double,        
which however kept me but very indifferently from the hardness of           
the floor, that was of smooth stone. By the same computation they           
provided me with sheets, blankets, and coverlets, tolerable enough for      
one who had been so long inured to hardships as I.                          
  As the news of my arrival spread through the kingdom, it brought          
prodigious numbers of rich, idle, and curious people to see me; so          
that the villages were almost emptied, and great neglect of tillage         
and household affairs must have ensued, if his Imperial Majesty had         
not provided, by several proclamations and orders of state, against         
this inconveniency. He directed that those who had already beheld me        
should return home, and not presume to come within fifty yards of my        
house without license from court; whereby the secretaries of state got      
considerable fees.                                                          
                                                     {P_1|CH_2 ^paragraph 5}
  In the meantime, the Emperor held frequent councils to debate what        
course should be taken with me; and I was afterwards assured by a           
particular friend, a person of great quality, who was looked upon to        
be as much in the secret as any, that the court was under many              
difficulties concerning me. They apprehended my breaking loose, that        
my diet would be very expensive, and might cause a famine. Sometimes        
they determined to starve me, or at least to shoot me in the face           
and hands with poisoned arrows, which would soon dispatch me: but           
again they considered, that the stench of so large a carcass might          
produce a plague in the metropolis, and probably spread through the         
whole kingdom. In the midst of these consultations, several officers        
of the army went to the door of the great council chamber; and two          
of them being admitted, gave an account of my behavior to the six           
criminals above mentioned, which made so favorable an impression in         
the breast of his Majesty and the whole board in my behalf, that an         
Imperial Commission was issued out, obliging all the villages nine          
hundred yards round the city, to deliver in every morning six               
beeves, forty sheep, and other victuals for my sustenance; together         
with a proportionable quantity of bread, and wine, and other liquors        
for the due payment of which his Majesty gave assignments upon his          
treasury. For this prince lives chiefly upon his own demesnes, seldom,      
except upon great occasions, raising any subsidies upon his                 
subjects, who are bound to attend him in his wars at their own              
expense. An establishment was-also made of six hundred persons to be        
my domestics, who had board-wages allowed for their maintenance, and        
tents built for them very conveniently on each side of my door. It was      
likewise ordered, that three hundred tailors should make me a suit          
of clothes after the fashion of the country: that six of his Majesty's      
greatest scholars should be employed to instruct me in their language:      
and, lastly, that the Emperor's horses, and those of the nobility, and      
troops of guards, should be frequently exercised in my sight, to            
accustom themselves to me. All these orders were duly put in                
execution, and in about three weeks I made a great progress in              
learning their language; during which time the Emperor frequently           
honored me with his visits, and was pleased to assist my masters in         
teaching me. We began already to converse together in some sort; and        
the first words I learned were to express my desire that he would           
please give me my liberty, which I every day repeated on my knees. His      
answer, as I could apprehend it, was, that this must be a work of           
time, not to be thought on without the advice of his council, and that      
first I must Lumos kelmin pesso desmar lon Emposo; that is, swear a         
peace with him and his kingdom. However, that I should be used with         
all kindness; and he advised me to acquire, by my patience and              
discreet behavior, the good opinion of himself and his subjects. He         
desired I would not take it ill, if he gave orders to certain proper        
officers to search me; for probably I might carry about me several          
weapons, which must needs be dangerous things, if they answered the         
bulk of so prodigious a person. I said, his Majesty should be               
satisfied, for I was ready to strip myself, and turn out my pockets         
before him. This I delivered part in words, and part in signs. He           
replied, that by the laws of the kingdom I must be searched by two          
of his officers; that he knew this could not be done without my             
consent and assistance; that he had so good an opinion of my                
generosity and justice, as to trust their persons in my hands: that         
whatever they took from me should be returned when I left the country,      
or paid for at the rate which I would set upon them. I took up the two      
officers in my hands, put them first into my coat-pockets, and then         
into every other pocket about me, except my two fobs, and another           
secret pocket I had no mind should be searched, wherein I had some          
little necessaries that were of no consequence to any but myself. In        
one of my fobs there was a silver watch, and in the other a small           
quantity of gold in a purse. These gentlemen, having pen, ink, and          
paper about them, made an exact inventory of everything they saw;           
and when they were through, desired I would set them down, that they        
might deliver it to the Emperor. This inventory I afterwards                
translated that into English, and is word for word as follows.              
-                                                                           
  Imprimis, In the right coat pocket of the Great Man Mountain (for so      
I interpret the words Quinbus Flestrin) after the strictest search, we      
found only one great piece of coarse cloth, large enough to be a            
foot cloth for your Majesty's chief room of state. In the left              
pocket we saw a huge silver chest, with a cover of the same metal,          
which we the searchers were not able to lift. We desired it should          
be opened, and one of us stepping into it, found himself up to the mid      
leg in a sort of dust, some part whereof flying up to our faces, set        
us both sneezing for several times together. In his right waistcoat         
pocket we found a prodigious bundle of white thin substances, folded        
one over another, about the bigness of three men, tied with a strong        
cable, and marked with black figures; which we humbly conceive to be        
writings, every letter almost half as large as the palm of our              
hands. In the left there was a sort of engine, from the back of             
which were extended twenty long poles, resembling the palisades before      
your Majesty's court; wherewith we conjecture the Man-Mountain combs        
his head, for we did not always trouble him with questions, because we      
found it a great difficulty to make him understand us. In the large         
pocket on the right side of his middle cover (so I translate the            
word ranfu-lo, by which they meant my breeches) we saw a hollow pillar      
of iron, about the length of a man, fastened to a strong piece of           
timber, larger than the pillar; and upon one side of the pillar were        
huge pieces of iron sticking out, cut into strange figures, which we        
know not what to make of. In the left pocket, another engine of the         
same kind. In the smaller pocket on the right side, were several round      
flat pieces of white and red metal, of different bulk; some of the          
white, which seemed to be silver, were so large and heavy, that my          
comrade and I could hardly lift them. In the left pocket were two           
black pillars irregularly shaped: we could not, without difficulty,         
reach the top of them as we stood at the bottom of his pocket. One          
of them was covered, and seemed all of a piece: but at the upper end        
of the other, there appeared a white round substance, about twice           
the bigness of our heads. Within each of these was enclosed a               
prodigious plate of steel; which, by our orders, we obliged him to          
show us, because we apprehended they might be dangerous engines. He         
took them out of their cases, and told us, that in his own country his      
practice was to shave his beard with one of these, and to cut his meat      
with the other. There were two pockets which we could not enter: these      
he called his fobs; they were two large slits cut into the top of           
his middle cover, but squeezed close by the pressure of his belly. Out      
of the right fob hung a great silver chain, with a wonderful kind of        
engine at the bottom. We directed him to draw out whatever was              
fastened to that chain; which appeared to be a globe, half silver, and      
half of some transparent metal: for on the transparent side we saw          
certain strange figures circularly drawn, and thought we could touch        
them, till we found our fingers stopped by that lucid substance. He         
put this engine to our ears, which made an incessant noise like that        
of a watermill: and we conjecture it is either some unknown animal, or      
the god that he worships; but we are more inclined to the latter            
opinion, because he assured us (if we understood him right, for he          
expressed himself very imperfectly) that he seldom did anything             
without consulting it: he called it his oracle, and said it pointed         
out the time for every action of his life. From the left fob he took        
out a net almost large enough for a fisherman, but contrived to open        
and shut like a purse, and serve him for the same use: we found             
therein several massy pieces of yellow metal, which, if they be real        
gold, must be of immense value.                                             
  Having thus, in obedience to your Majesty's commands, diligently          
searched all his pockets, we observed a girdle about his waist made of      
the hide of some prodigious animal; from which, on the left side, hung      
a sword of the length of five men; and on the right, a bag or pouch         
divided into two cells, each cell capable of holding three of your          
Majesty's subjects. In one of these cells were several globes or balls      
of a most ponderous metal, about the bigness of our heads, and              
requiring a strong hand to lift them: the other cell contained a            
heap of certain black grains, but of no great bulk or weight, for we        
could hold above fifty of them in the palms of our hands.                   
  This is an exact inventory of what we found about the body of the         
Man-Mountain, who used us with great civility, and due respect to your      
Majesty's commission. Signed and sealed on the fourth day of the            
eighty-ninth moon of your Majesty's auspicious reign.                       
                                                    {P_1|CH_2 ^paragraph 10}
                                   Clefren Frelock, Marsi Frelock.          
-                                                                           
-                                                                           
  When this inventory was read over to the Emperor, he directed me,         
although in very gentle terms, to deliver up the several                    
particulars. He first called for my scimitar, which I took out,             
scabbard and all. In the meantime he ordered three thousand of his          
choicest troops (who then attended him) to surround me at a                 
distance, with their bows and arrows just ready to discharge: but I         
did not observe it, for my eyes were wholly fixed upon his Majesty. He      
then desired me to draw my scimitar, which, although it had got some        
rust by the sea water, was in most parts exceeding bright. I did so,        
and immediately all the troops gave a shout between terror and              
surprise; for the sun shone clear, and the reflection dazzled their         
eyes as I waved the scimitar to and fro in my hand. His Majesty, who        
is a most magnanimous prince, was less daunted than I could expect; he      
ordered me to return it into the scabbard, and cast it on the ground        
as gently as I could, about six foot from the end of my chain. The          
next thing he demanded was one of the hollow iron pillars, by which he      
meant my pocket-pistols. I drew it out, and at his desire, as well          
as I could, expressed to him the use of it; and charging it only            
with powder, which by the closeness of my pouch happened to escape          
wetting in the sea (an inconvenience against which all prudent              
mariners take special care to provide) I first cautioned the Emperor        
not to be afraid, and then I let it off in the air. The astonishment        
here was much greater than at the sight of my scimitar. Hundreds            
fell down as if they had been struck dead; and even the Emperor,            
although he stood his ground, could not recover himself in some             
time. I delivered up both my pistols in the same manner as I had            
done my scimitar, and then my pouch of powder and bullets; begging him      
that the former might be kept from the fire, for it would kindle            
with the smallest spark, and blow up his imperial palace into the air.      
I likewise delivered up my watch, which the Emperor was very curious        
to see, and commanded two of his tallest yeomen of the guards to            
bear it on a pole upon their shoulders, as draymen in England do a          
barrel of ale. He was amazed at the continual noise it made, and the        
motion of the minute-hand, which he could easily discern; for their         
sight is much more acute than ours; and asked the opinions of his           
learned men about him, which were various and remote, as the reader         
may well imagine without my repeating; although indeed I could not          
very perfectly understand them. I then gave up my silver and copper         
money, my purse with nine large pieces of gold, and some smaller ones;      
my knife and razor, my comb and silver snuff-box, my handkerchief and       
journal-book. My scimitar, pistols, and pouch, were conveyed in             
carriages to his Majesty's stores; but the rest of my goods were            
returned me.                                                                
  I had, as I before observed, one private pocket which escaped             
their search, wherein there was a pair of spectacles (which I               
sometimes use for the weakness of my eyes), a pocket perspective,           
and several other little conveniences; which, being of no                   
consequence to the Emperor, I did not think myself bound in honor to        
discover, and I apprehended they might be lost or spoiled if I              
ventured them out of my possession.                                         
                                                                            
P_1|CH_3                                                                    
  CHAPTER III                                                               
-                                                                           
  My gentleness and good behavior had gained so far on the Emperor and      
his court, and indeed upon the army and people in general, that I           
began to conceive hopes of getting my liberty in a short time. I            
took all possible methods to cultivate this favorable disposition. The      
natives came by degrees to be less apprehensive of any danger from me.      
I would sometimes lie down, and let five or six of them dance on my         
hand. And last the boys and girls would venture to come and play at         
hide and seek in my hair. I had now made good progress in                   
understanding and speaking their language. The Emperor had a mind           
one day to entertain me with several of the country shows, wherein          
they exceeded all nations I have known, both for dexterity and              
magnificence. I was diverted with none so much as that of the               
rope-dancers, performed upon a slender white thread, extended about         
two feet, and twelve inches from the ground. Upon which I shall desire      
liberty, with the reader's patience, to enlarge a little.                   
  This diversion is only practiced by those persons who are candidates      
for great employments and high favors at court. They are trained in         
this art from their youth, and are not always of noble birth, or            
liberal education. When a great office is vacant either by death or         
disgrace (which often happens) five or six of those candidates              
petition the Emperor to entertain his Majesty and the court with a          
dance on the rope, and whoever jumps the highest without falling,           
succeeds in the office. Very often the chief ministers themselves           
are commanded to show their skill, and to convince the Emperor that         
they have not lost their faculty. Flimnap, the Treasurer, is allowed        
to cut a caper on the straight rope, at least an inch higher than           
any other lord in the whole empire. I have seen him do the summerset        
several times together upon a trencher fixed on the rope, which is          
no thicker than a common packthread in England. My friend Reldresal,        
principal Secretary for Private Affairs, is, in my opinion, if I am         
not partial, the second after the Treasurer; the rest of the great          
officers are much upon a par.                                               
  These diversions are often attended with fatal accidents, whereof         
great numbers are on record. I myself have seen two or three                
candidates break a limb. But the danger is much greater when the            
ministers themselves are commanded to show their dexterity; for by          
contending to excell themselves and their fellows, they strain so far,      
that there is hardly one of them who has not received a fall, and some      
of them two or three. I was assured that a year or two before my            
arrival, Flimnap would have infallibly broken his neck, if one of           
the King's cushions, that accidentally lay on the ground, had not           
weakened the force of his fall.                                             
  There is likewise another diversion, which is only shown before           
the Emperor and Empress, and first minister, upon particular                
occasions. The Emperor lays on the table three fine silken threads          
of six inches long. One is blue, the other red, and the third green.        
These threads are proposed as prizes for those persons whom the             
Emperor has a mind to distinguish by a peculiar mark of his favor. The      
ceremony is performed in his Majesty's great chamber of state, where        
the candidates are to undergo a trial of dexterity very different from      
the former, and such as I have not observed the least resemblance of        
in any other country of the old or the new world. The Emperor holds         
a stick in his hands, both ends parallel to the horizon, while the          
candidates, advancing one by one, sometimes leap over the stick,            
sometimes creep under it backwards and forwards several times,              
according as the stick is advanced or depressed. Sometimes the Emperor      
holds one end of the stick, and his first minister the other;               
sometimes the minister has it entirely to himself. Whoever performs         
his part with most agility, and holds out the longest in leaping and        
creeping, is rewarded with the blue-colored silk; the red is given          
to the next, and the green to the third, which they all wear girt           
twice round about the middle; and you see few great persons about this      
court who are not adorned with one of these girdles.                        
  The horses of the army, and those of the royal stables, having            
been daily led before me, were no longer shy, but would come up to          
my very feet without starting. The riders would leap them over my hand      
as I held it on the ground, and one of the Emperor's huntsmen, upon         
a large courser, took my foot, shoe and all; which was indeed a             
prodigious leap. I had the good fortune to divert the Emperor one           
day after a very extraordinary manner. I desired he would order             
several sticks two feet high, and the thickness of an ordinary cane,        
to be brought me; whereupon his Majesty commanded the master of his         
woods to give directions accordingly; and the next morning six woodmen      
arrived with as many carriages, drawn by eight horses to each. I            
took nine of these sticks, and fixing them firmly in the ground in a        
quadrangular figure, two feet and a half square, I took four other          
sticks, and tied them parallel at each corner, about two feet from the      
ground; then I fastened my handkerchief to the nine sticks that             
stood erect, and extended it on all sides till it was as tight as           
the top of a drum; and the four parallel sticks rising about five           
inches higher than the handkerchief served as ledges on each side.          
When I had finished my work, I desired the Emperor to let a troop of        
his best horse, twentyfour in number, come and exercise upon this           
plain. His Majesty approved of the proposal, and I took them up one by      
one in my hands, ready mounted and armed, with the proper officers          
to exercise them. As soon as they got into order, they divided into         
two parties, performed mock skirmishes, discharged blunt arrows,            
drew their swords, fled and pursued, attacked and retired, and in           
short discovered the best military discipline I ever beheld. The            
parallel sticks secured them and their horses from falling over the         
stage; and the Emperor was so much delighted, that he ordered this          
entertainment to be repeated several days, and once was pleased to          
be lifted up and give the word of command; and, with great difficulty,      
persuaded even the Empress herself to let me hold her in her close          
chair within two yards of the stage, from whence she was able to            
take a full view of the whole performance. It was my good fortune that      
no ill accident happened in these entertainments, only once a fiery         
horse that belonged to one of the captains pawing with his hoof struck      
a hole in my handkerchief, and his foot slipping, he overthrew his          
rider and himself; but I immediately relieved them both, and                
covering the hole with one hand, I set down the troop with the              
other, in the same manner as I took them up. The horse that fell was        
strained in the left shoulder, but the rider got no hurt, and I             
repaired my handkerchief as well as I could: however I would not trust      
to the strength of it any more in such dangerous enterprises.               
                                                     {P_1|CH_3 ^paragraph 5}
  About two or three days before I was set at liberty, as I was             
entertaining the court with these kind of feats, there arrived an           
express to inform his Majesty that some of his subjects riding near         
the place where I was first taken up, had seen a great black substance      
lying on the ground, very oddly shaped, extending its edges round as        
wide as his Majesty's bedchamber, and rising up in the middle as            
high as a man; that it was no living creature, as they at first             
apprehended, for it lay on the grass without motion, and some of            
them had walked round it several tunes: that by mounting upon each          
other's shoulders, they had got to the top, which was flat and even,        
and stamping upon it they found it was hollow within; that they humbly      
conceived it might be something belonging to the Man-Mountain, and          
if his Majesty pleased, they would undertake to bring it with only          
five horses. I presently knew what they meant, and was glad at heart        
to receive this intelligence. It seems upon my first reaching the           
shore after our shipwreck, I was in such confusion, that before I came      
to the place where I went to sleep, my hat, which I had fastened            
with a string to my head while I was rowing, and had stuck on all           
the time I was swimming, fell off after I came to land; the string, as      
I conjecture, breaking by some accident which I never observed, but         
thought my hat had been lost at sea. I entreated his Imperial               
Majesty to give orders it might be brought to me as soon as                 
possible, describing to him the use and the nature of it: and the next      
day the wagoners arrived with it, but not in a very good condition;         
they had bored two holes in the brim, within an inch and a half of the      
edge, and fastened two hooks in the holes; these hooks were tied by         
a long cord to the harness, and thus my hat was dragged along for           
above half an English mile: but the ground in that country being            
extremely smooth and level, it received less damage than I expected.        
  Two days after this adventure, the Emperor having ordered that            
part of his army which quarters in and about his metropolis to be in a      
readiness, took a fancy of diverting himself in a very singular             
manner. He desired I would stand like a Colossus, with my legs as           
far asunder as I conveniently could. He then commanded his General          
(who was an old experienced leader, and a great patron of mine) to          
draw up the troops in close order, and march them under me, the foot        
by twentyfour in a breast, and the horse by sixteen, with drums             
beating, colors flying, and pikes advanced. This body consisted of          
three thousand foot, and a thousand horse. His Majesty gave orders,         
upon pain of death, that every soldier in his march should observe the      
strictest decency with regard to my person; which, however, could           
not prevent some of the younger officers from turning up their eyes as      
they passed under me. And, to confess the truth, my breeches were at        
that time in so ill a condition, that they afforded some opportunities      
for laughter and admiration.                                                
  I had sent so many memorials and petitions for my liberty, that           
his Majesty at length mentioned the matter, first in the cabinet,           
and then in a full council; where it was opposed by none, except            
Skyresh Bolgolam, who was pleased, without any provocation, to be my        
mortal enemy. But it was carried against him by the whole board, and        
confirmed by the Emperor. That minister was Galbet, or Admiral of           
the Realm, very much in his master's confidence, and a person well          
versed in affairs, but of a morose and sour complexion. However, he         
was at length persuaded to comply; but prevailed that the articles and      
conditions upon which I should be set free, and to which I must swear,      
should be drawn up by himself. These articles were brought to me by         
Skyresh Bolgolam in person, attended by two under-secretaries, and          
several persons of distinction. After they were read, I was demanded        
to swear to the performance of them; first in the manner of my own          
country, and afterwards in the method prescribed by their laws;             
which was to hold my right foot in my left hand, to place the middle        
finger of my right hand on the crown of my head, and my thumb on the        
tip of my right ear. But because the reader may perhaps be curious          
to have some idea of the style and manner of expression peculiar to         
that people, as well as to know the articles upon which I recovered my      
liberty, I have made a translation of the whole instrument word for         
word, as near as I was able, which I here offer to the public.              
-                                                                           
  GOLBASTO MOMAREN EVLAME GURDILO SHEFIN MULLY ULLY GUE, most mighty        
Emperor of Lilliput, delight and terror of the universe, whose              
dominions extend five thousand blustrugs (about twelve miles in             
circumference) to the extremities of the globe; monarch of all              
monarchs, taller than the sons of men; whose feet press down to the         
center, and whose head strikes against the sun; at whose nod the            
princes of the earth shake their knees; pleasant as the spring,             
comfortable as the summer, fruitful as autumn, dreadful as winter. His      
most sublime Majesty proposes to the Man-Mountain, lately arrived to        
our celestial dominions, the following articles, which by a solemn          
oath he shall be obliged to perform.                                        
                                                    {P_1|CH_3 ^paragraph 10}
  First, The Man-Mountain shall not depart from our dominions, without      
our license under our great seal.                                           
  2nd, He shall not presume to come into our metropolis, without our        
express order; at which time the inhabitants shall have two hours           
warning to keep within their doors.                                         
  3rd, The said Man-Mountain shall confine his walks to our                 
principal high roads, and not offer to walk or lie down in a meadow or      
field of corn.                                                              
  4th, As he walks the said roads, he shall take the utmost care not        
to trample upon the bodies of any of our loving subjects, their             
horses, or carriages, nor take any of our said subjects into his            
hands, without their own consent.                                           
  5th, If an express requires extraordinary dispatch, the Man-Mountain      
shall be obliged to carry in his pocket the messenger and horse a           
six days journey once in every moon, and return the said messenger          
back (if so required) safe to our Imperial Presence.                        
                                                    {P_1|CH_3 ^paragraph 15}
  6th, He shall be our ally against our enemies in the Island of            
Blefuscu, and do his utmost to destroy their fleet, which is now            
preparing to invade us.                                                     
  7th, That the said Man-Mountain shall, at his times of leisure, be        
aiding and assisting to our workmen, in helping to raise certain great      
stones, towards covering the wall of the principal park, and other          
of our royal buildings.                                                     
  8th, That the said Man-Mountain shall, in two moons' time, deliver        
in an exact survey of the circumference of our dominions by a               
computation of his own paces round the coast.                               
   Lastly, That upon his solemn oath to observe all the above               
articles, the said Man-Mountain shall have a daily allowance of meat        
and drink sufficient for the support of 1,728 of our subjects, with         
free access to our Royal Person, and other marks of our favor. Given        
at our Palace at Belfaborac the twelfth day of the ninety-first moon        
of our reign.                                                               
-                                                                           
                                                    {P_1|CH_3 ^paragraph 20}
  I swore and subscribed to these articles with great cheerfulness and      
content, although some of them were not so honorable as I could have        
wished; which proceeded wholly from the malice of Skyresh Bolgolam the      
High Admiral: whereupon my chains were immediately unlocked, and I was      
at full liberty; the Emperor himself in person did me the honor to          
be by at the whole ceremony. I made my acknowledgments by                   
prostrating myself at his Majesty's feet: but he commanded me to rise;      
and after many gracious expressions, which, to avoid the censure of         
vanity, I shall not repeat, he added, that he hoped I should prove a        
useful servant, and well deserve all the favors he had already              
conferred upon me, or might do for the future.                              
  The reader may please to observe, that in the last article for the        
recovery of my liberty the Emperor stipulates to allow me a quantity        
of meat and drink sufficient for the support of 1,728 Lilliputians.         
Some time after, asking a friend at court how they came to fix on that      
determinate number, he told me that his Majesty's mathematicians,           
having taken the height of my body by the help of a quadrant, and           
finding it to exceed theirs in the proportion of twelve to one, they        
concluded from the similarity of their bodies, that mine must               
contain at least 1,728 of theirs, and consequently would require as         
much food as was necessary to support that number of Lilliputians.          
By which the reader may conceive an idea of the ingenuity of that           
people, as well as the prudent and exact economy of so great a prince.      
                                                                            
P_1|CH_4                                                                    
  CHAPTER IV                                                                
-                                                                           
  The first request I made after I had obtained my liberty, was,            
that I might have license to see Mildendo, the metropolis, which the        
Emperor easily granted me, but with a special charge to do no hurt          
either to the inhabitants or their houses. The people had notice by         
proclamation of my design to visit the town. The wall which                 
encompassed it is two feet and a half high, and at least eleven inches      
broad, so that a coach and horses may be driven very safely round           
it; and it is flanked with strong towers at ten feet distance. I            
stepped over the great Gate, and passed very gently, and sidering           
through the two principal streets, only in my short waistcoat, for          
fear of damaging the roofs and eaves of the houses with the skirts          
of my coat. I walked with the utmost circumspection, to avoid treading      
on any stragglers, that might remain in the streets, although the           
orders were very strict, that all people should keep in their houses        
at their own peril. The garret windows and tops of houses were so           
crowded with spectators, that I thought in all my travels I had not         
seen a more populous place. The city is an exact square, each side          
of the wall being five hundred feet long. The two great streets, which      
run cross and divide it into four quarters, are five feet wide. The         
lanes and alleys, which I could not enter, but only viewed them as I        
passed, are from twelve to eighteen inches. The town is capable of          
holding five hundred thousand souls. The houses are from three to five      
stories. The shops and markets well provided.                               
  The Emperor's palace is in the centre of the city, where the two          
great streets meet. It is enclosed by a wall of two feet high, and          
twenty feet distant from the buildings. I had his Majesty's permission      
to step over this wall; and the space being so wide between that and        
the palace, I could easily view it on every side. The outward court is      
a square of forty feet, and includes two other courts: in the inmost        
are the royal apartments, which I was very desirous to see, but             
found it extremely difficult; for the great gates, from one square          
into another, were but eighteen inches high and seven inches wide. Now      
the buildings of the outer court were at least five feet high, and          
it was impossible for me to stride over them without infinite damage        
to the pile, though the walls were strongly built of hewn stone, and        
four inches thick. At the same time the Emperor had a great desire          
that I should see the magnificence of his palace; but this I was not        
able to do till three days after, which I spent in cutting down with        
my knife some of the largest trees in the royal park, about a               
hundred yards distant from the city. Of these trees I made two stools,      
each about three feet high, and strong enough to bear my weight. The        
people having received notice a second time, I went again through           
the city to the palace, with my two stools in my hands. When I came to      
the side of the outer court, I stood upon one stool, and took the           
other in my hand: this I lifted over the roof, and gently set it            
down on the space between the first and second court, which was             
eight feet wide. I then stepped over the buildings very conveniently        
from one stool to the other, and drew up the first after me with a          
hooked stick. By this contrivance I got into the inmost court; and          
lying down upon my side, I applied my face to the windows of the            
middle stories, which were left open on purpose, and discovered the         
most splendid apartments that can be imagined. There I saw the Empress      
and the young Princes, in their several lodgings, with their chief          
attendants about them. Her Imperial Majesty was pleased to smile            
very graciously upon me, and gave me out of the window her hand to          
kiss.                                                                       
  But I shall not anticipate the reader with farther descriptions of        
this kind, because I reserve them for a greater work, which is now          
almost ready for the press, containing a general description of this        
empire, from its first erection, through a long series of princes,          
with a particular account of their wars and politics, laws,                 
learning, and religion: their plants and animals, their peculiar            
manners and customs, with other matters very curious and useful; my         
chief design at present being only to relate such events and                
transactions as happened to the public, or to myself, during a              
residence of about nine months in that empire.                              
  One morning, about a fortnight after I had obtained my liberty,           
Reldresal, principal Secretary (as they style him) of Private Affairs,      
came to my house attended only by one servant. He ordered his coach to      
wait at a distance, and desired I would give him an hour's audience;        
which I readily consented to, on account of his quality and personal        
merits, as well as the many good offices he had done me during my           
solicitations at court. I offered to lie down, that he might the            
more conveniently reach my ear; but he chose rather to let me hold him      
in my hand during our conversation. He began with compliments on my         
liberty; said he might pretend to some merit in it: but, however,           
added, that if it had not been for the present situation of things          
at court, perhaps I might not have obtained it so soon. For, said           
he, as flourishing a condition as we may appear to be in to                 
foreigners, we labor under two mighty evils; a violent faction at           
home, and the danger of an invasion by a most potent enemy from             
abroad. As to the first, you are to understand, that for above seventy      
moons past there have been two struggling parties in this empire,           
under the names of Tramecksan and Slamecksan, from the high and low         
heels on their shoes, by which they distinguish themselves. It is           
alleged indeed, that the high heels are most agreeable to our               
ancient constitution: but however this be, his Majesty has                  
determined to make use of only low heels in the administration of           
the government, and all offices in the gift of the Crown, as you            
cannot but observe; and particularly, that his Majesty's Imperial           
heels are lower at least by a drurr than any of his court; (drurr is a      
measure about the fourteenth part of an inch). The animosities between      
these two parties run so high, that they will neither eat nor drink,        
nor talk with each other. We compute the Tramecksan, or High-Heels, to      
exceed us in number; but the power is wholly on our side. We apprehend      
his Imperial Highness, the Heir to the Crown, to have some tendency         
towards the High-Heels; at least we can plainly discover one of his         
heels higher than the other, which gives him a hobble in his gait.          
Now, in the midst of these intestine disquiets, we are threatened with      
an invasion from the Island of Blefuscu, which is the other great           
empire of the universe, almost as large and powerful as this of his         
Majesty. For as to what we have heard you affirm, that there are other      
kingdoms and states in the world inhabited by human creatures as large      
as yourself, our philosophers are in much doubt, and would rather           
conjecture that you dropped from the moon, or one of the stars;             
because it is certain, that a hundred mortals of your bulk would, in a      
short time, destroy all the fruits and cattle of his Majesty's              
dominions. Besides, our histories of six thousand moons make no             
mention of any other regions, than the two great empires of Lilliput        
and Blefuscu. Which two mighty powers have, as I was going to tell          
you, been engaged in a most obstinate war for six and thirty moons          
past. It began upon the following occasion. It is allowed on all            
hands, that the primitive way of breaking eggs, before we eat them,         
was upon the larger end: but his present Majesty's grandfather,             
while he was a boy, going to eat an egg, and breaking it according          
to the ancient practice, happened to cut one of his fingers. Whereupon      
the Emperor his father published an edict, commanding all his               
subjects, upon great penalties, to break the smaller end of their           
eggs. The people so highly resented this law, that our histories            
tell us there have been six rebellions raised on that account; wherein      
one Emperor lost his life, and another his crown. These civil               
commotions were constantly fomented by the monarchs of Blefuscu; and        
when they were quelled, the exiles always fled for refuge to that           
empire. It is computed, that eleven thousand persons have, at               
several times, suffered death, rather than submit to break their            
eggs at the smaller end. Many hundred large volumes have been               
published upon this controversy: but the books of the Big-Endians have      
been long forbidden, and the whole party rendered incapable by law          
of holding employments. During the course of these troubles, the            
Emperors of Blefuscu did frequently expostulate by their                    
ambassadors, accusing us of making a schism in religion, by                 
offending against a fundamental doctrine of our great prophet Lustrog,      
in the fifty-fourth chapter of the Blundecral (which is their however,      
is thought to be a mere strain upon the text: for the words are these;      
That all true believers shall break their eggs at the convenient            
end: and which is the convenient end, seems, in my humble opinion,          
to be left to every man's conscience, or at least in the power of           
the chief magistrate to determine. Now the Big-Endian exiles have           
found so much credit in the Emperor of Blefuscu's court, and so much        
private assistance and encouragement from their party here at home,         
that a bloody war has been carried on between the two empires for           
six and thirty moons with various success; during which time we have        
lost forty capital ships, and a much greater number of smaller              
vessels, together with thirty thousand of our best seamen and               
soldiers; and the damage received by the enemy is reckoned to be            
somewhat greater than ours. However, they have now equipped a numerous      
fleet, and are just preparing to make a descent upon us; and his            
Imperial Majesty, placing great confidence in your valor and strength,      
has commanded me to lay this account of his affairs before you.             
  I desired the Secretary to present my humble duty to the Emperor,         
and to let him know, that I thought it would not become me, who was         
a foreigner, to interfere with parties; but I was ready, with the           
hazard of my life, to defend his person and state against all               
invaders.                                                                   
                                                                            
P_1|CH_5                                                                    
  CHAPTER V                                                                 
-                                                                           
  The Empire of Blefuscu is an island situated to the                       
north-northeast side of Lilliput, from whence it is parted only by a        
channel of eight hundred yards wide. I had not yet seen it, and upon        
this notice of an intended invasion, I avoided appearing on that            
side of the coast, for fear of being discovered by some of the enemy's      
ships, who had received no intelligence of me, all intercourse between      
the two empires having been strictly forbidden during the war, upon         
pain of death, and an embargo laid by our Emperor upon all vessels          
whatsoever. I communicated to his Majesty a project I had formed of         
seizing the enemy's whole fleet: which, as our scouts assured us,           
lay at anchor in the harbor ready to sail with the first fair wind.         
I consulted the most experienced seamen, upon the depth of the              
channel, which they had often plumbed, who told me, that in the middle      
at high-water it was seventy glumgluffs deep, which is about six            
feet of European measure; and the rest of it fifty glumgluffs at most.      
I walked towards the northeast coast over against Blefuscu; and             
lying down behind a hillock, took out my small pocket perspective           
glass, and viewed the enemy's fleet at anchor, consisting of about          
fifty men of war, and a great number of transports; I then came back        
to my house, and gave order (for which I had a warrant) for a great         
quantity of the strongest cable and bars of iron. The cable was             
about as thick as packthread, and the bars of the length and size of a      
knitting needle. I trebled the cable to make it stronger, and for           
the same reason I twisted three of the iron bars together, binding the      
extremities into a hook. Having thus fixed fifty hooks to as many           
cables, I went back to the northeast coast, and putting off my coat,        
shoes, and stockings, walked into the sea in my leather jerkin,             
about half an hour before high water. I waded with what haste I could,      
and swam in the middle about thirty yards till I felt ground; I             
arrived at the fleet in less than half an hour. The enemy was so            
frighted when they saw me, that they leaped out of their ships, and         
swam to shore, where there could not be fewer than thirty thousand          
souls. I then took my tackling, and fastening a hook to a hole at           
the prow of each, I tied all the cords together at the end. While I         
was thus employed, the enemy discharged several thousand arrows,            
many of which stuck in my hands and face; and besides the excessive         
smart, gave me much disturbance in my work. My greatest apprehension        
was for my eyes, which I should have infallibly lost, if I had not          
suddenly thought of an expedient. I kept among other little                 
necessaries a pair of spectacles in a private pocket, which, as I           
observed before, had escaped the Emperor's searchers. These I took out      
and fastened as strongly as I could upon my nose, and thus armed            
went on boldly with my work in spite of the enemy's arrows, many of         
which struck against the glasses of my spectacles, but without any          
other effect, further than a little to discompose them. I now fastened      
all the hooks, and taking the knot in my hand, began to pull; but           
not a ship would stir, for they were all too fast held by their             
anchors, so that the boldest part of my enterprise remained. I              
therefore let go the cord, and leaving the hooks fixed to the ships, I      
resolutely cut with my knife the cables that fastened the anchors,          
receiving above two hundred shots in my face and hands; then I took up      
the knotted end of the cables to which my hooks were tied, and with         
great ease drew fifty of the enemy's men-of-war after me.                   
  The Blefuscudians, who had not the least imagination of what I            
intended, were at first confounded with astonishment. They had seen me      
cut the cables, and thought my design was only to let the ships run         
adrift or fall foul on each other: but when they perceived the whole        
fleet moving in order, and saw me pulling at the end, they set up such      
a scream of grief and despair, that it is almost impossible to              
describe or conceive. When I had got out of danger, I stopped awhile        
to pick out the arrows that stuck in my hands and face, and rubbed          
on some of the same ointment that was given me at my first arrival, as      
I have formerly mentioned. I then took off my spectacles, and               
waiting about an hour, till the tide was a little fallen, I waded           
through the middle with my cargo, and arrived safe at the royal port        
of Lilliput                                                                 
  The Emperor and his whole court stood on the shore expecting the          
issue of this great adventure. They saw the ships move forward in a         
large half-moon, but could not discern me, who was up to my breast          
in water. When I advanced to the middle of the channel, they were           
yet in more pain, because I was under water to my neck. The Emperor         
concluded me to be drowned, and that the enemy's fleet was approaching      
in a hostile manner: but he was soon eased of his fears, for the            
channel growing shallower every step I made, I came in a short time         
within hearing, and holding up the end of the cable by which the fleet      
was fastened, I cried in a loud voice, Long live the most puissant          
Emperor of Lilliput! This great prince received me at my landing            
with all possible encomiums, and created me a Nardac upon the spot,         
which is the highest title of honor among them.                             
  His Majesty desired I would take some other opportunity of                
bringing all the rest of his enemy's ships into his ports. And so           
unmeasurable is the ambition of princes, that he seemed to think of         
nothing less than reducing the whole empire of Blefuscu into a              
province, and governing it by a Viceroy; of destroying the                  
Big-Endian exiles, and compelling that people to break the smaller end      
of their eggs, by which he would remain the sole monarch of the             
whole world. But I endeavored to divert him from this design, by            
many arguments drawn from the topics of policy as well as justice; and      
I plainly protested, that I would never be an instrument of bringing a      
free and brave people into slavery. And when the matter was debated in      
council, the wisest part of the ministry were of my opinion.                
  This open bold declaration of mine was so opposite to the schemes         
and politics of his Imperial Majesty, that he could never forgive           
it; he mentioned it in a very artful manner at council, where I was         
told that some of the wisest appeared, at least by their silence, to        
be of my opinion; but others, who were my secret enemies, could not         
forbear some expressions, which by a side-wind reflected on me. And         
from this time began an intrigue between his Majesty and a junto of         
ministers maliciously bent against me, which broke out in less than         
two months, and had like to have ended in my utter destruction. Of          
so little weight are the greatest services to princes, when put into        
the balance with a refusal to gratify their passions.                       
                                                     {P_1|CH_5 ^paragraph 5}
  About three weeks after this exploit, there arrived a solemn embassy      
from Blefuscu, with humble offers of a peace; which was soon concluded      
upon conditions very advantageous to our Emperor, wherewith I shall         
not trouble the reader. There were six ambassadors, with a train of         
about five hundred persons, and their entry was very magnificent,           
suitable to the grandeur of their master, and the importance of             
their business. When their treaty was finished, wherein I did them          
several good offices by the credit I now had, or at least appeared          
to have at court, their Excellencies, who were privately told how much      
I had been their friend, made me a visit in form. They began with many      
compliments upon my valor and generosity, invited me to that kingdom        
in the Emperor their master's name, and desired me to show them some        
proofs of my prodigious strength, of which they had heard so many           
wonders; wherein I readily obliged them, but shall not trouble the          
reader with the particulars.                                                
  When I had for some time entertained their Excellencies, to their         
infinite satisfaction and surprise, I desired they would do me the          
honor to present my most humble respects to the Emperor their               
master, the renown of whose had so justly filled the whole world            
with admiration, and whose royal person I resolved to attend before         
I returned to my own country: accordingly, the next time I had the          
honor to see our Emperor, I desired his general license to wait on the      
Blefuscudian monarch, which he was pleased to grant me, as I could          
plainly perceive, in a very cold manner; but could not guess the            
reason, till I had a whisper from a certain person, that Flimnap and        
Bolgolam had represented my intercourse with those ambassadors as a         
mark of disaffection, from which I am sure my heart was wholly free.        
And this was the first time I began to conceive some imperfect idea of      
courts and ministers.                                                       
  It is to be observed, that these ambassadors spoke to me by an            
interpreter, the languages of both empires differing as much from each      
other as any two in Europe, and each nation priding itself upon the         
antiquity, beauty, and energy of their own tongues, with an avowed          
contempt for that of their neighbor; yet our Emperor, standing upon         
the advantage he had got by the seizure of their fleet, obliged them        
to deliver their credentials, and make their speech in the Lilliputian      
tongue. And it must be confessed, that from the great intercourse of        
trade and commerce between both realms, from the continual reception        
of exiles, which is mutual among them, and from the custom in each          
empire to send their young nobility and richer gentry to the other, in      
order to polish themselves by seeing the world and understanding men        
and manners; there are few persons of distinction, or merchants, or         
seamen, who dwell in the maritime parts, but what can hold                  
conversation both tongues; as I found some weeks after, when I went to      
pay my respects to the Emperor of Blefuscu, which in the midst of           
great misfortunes, through the malice of my enemies, proved a very          
happy adventure to me, as I shall relate in its proper place.               
  The reader may remember, that when I signed those articles upon           
which I recovered my liberty, there were some which I disliked upon         
account of their being too servile, neither could anything but an           
extreme necessity have forced me to submit. But being now a Nardac, of      
the highest rank in that empire, such offices were looked upon as           
below my dignity, and the Emperor (to do him justice) never once            
mentioned them to me. However, it was not long before I had an              
opportunity of doing his Majesty, at least, as I then thought, a            
most signal service. I was alarmed at midnight with the cries of            
many hundred people at my door; by which being suddenly awaked, I           
was in some kind of terror. I heard the word burglum repeated               
incessantly: several of the Emperor's court, making their way               
through the crowd, entreated me to come immediately to the Palace,          
where her Imperial Majesty's apartment was on fire, by the                  
carelessness of a maid of honor, who fell asleep while she was reading      
a romance. I got up in an instant; and orders being given to clear the      
way before me, and it being likewise a moonshine night, I made a shift      
to get to the Palace without trampling on any of the people. I found        
they had already applied ladders to the walls of the apartment, and         
were well provided with buckets, but the water was at some distance.        
These buckets were about the size of a large thimble, and the poor          
people supplied me with them as fast as they could; but the flame           
was so violent that they did little good. I might easily have               
stifled it with my coat, which I unfortunately left behind me for           
haste, and came away only in my leathern jerkin. The case seemed            
wholly desperate and deplorable; and this magnificent palace would          
have infallibly been burned down to the ground, if, by a presence of        
mind, unusual to me, I had not suddenly thought of an expedient. I had      
the evening before drunk plentifully of a most delicious wine,              
called glimigrim (the Blefuscudians call it flunec, but ours is             
esteemed the better sort), which is very diuretic. By the luckiest          
chance in the world, I had not discharged myself of any part of it.         
The heat I had contracted by coming very near the flames, and by            
laboring to quench them, made the wine begin to operate my urine;           
which I voided in such a quantity, and applied so well to the proper        
places, that in three minutes the fire was wholly extinguished, and         
the rest of that noble pile, which had cost so many ages in                 
erecting, preserved from destruction.                                       
  It was now daylight, and I returned to my house without waiting to        
congratulate with the Emperor: because, although I had done a very          
eminent piece of service, yet I could not tell how his Majesty might        
resent the manner by which I had performed it: for, by the fundamental      
laws of the realm, it is capital in any person, of what quality             
soever, to make water within the precincts of the palace. But I was         
a little comforted by a message from his Majesty, that he would give        
orders to the Grand Justiciary for passing my pardon in form; which,        
however, I could not obtain. And I was privately assured, that the          
Empress, conceiving the greatest abhorrence of what I had done,             
removed to the most distant side of the court, firmly resolved that         
those buildings should never be repaired for her use: and, in the           
presence of her chief confidants could not forbear vowing revenge.          
                                                                            
P_1|CH_6                                                                    
  CHAPTER VI                                                                
-                                                                           
  Although I intend to leave the description of this empire to a            
particular treatise, yet in the meantime I am content to gratify the        
curious reader with some general ideas. As the common size of the           
natives is somewhat under six inches high, so there is an exact             
proportion in all other animals, as well as plants and trees: for           
instance, the tallest horses and oxen are between four and five inches      
in height, the sheep an inch and a half, more or less: their geese          
about the bigness of a sparrow, and so the several gradations               
downwards till you come to the smallest, which, to my sight, were           
almost invisible; but nature had adapted the eyes of the                    
Lilliputians to all objects proper for their view: they see with great      
exactness, but at no great distance. And to show the sharpness of           
their sight towards objects that are near, I have been much pleased         
with observing a cook pulling a lark, which was not so large as a           
common fly; and a young girl threading an invisible needle with             
invisible silk. Their tallest trees are about seven feet high; I            
mean some of those in the great royal park, the tops whereof I could        
but just reach with my fist clenched. The other vegetables are in           
the same proportion; but this I leave to the reader's imagination.          
  I shall say but little at present of their learning, which for            
many ages had flourished in all its branches among them; but their          
manner of writing is very peculiar, being neither from the left to the      
right, like the Europeans; nor from the right to the left, like the         
Arabians; nor from up to down, like the Chinese; nor from down to           
up, like the Cascagians; but aslant from one corner of the paper to         
the other, like ladies in England.                                          
  They bury their dead with their heads directly downwards, because         
they hold an opinion, that in eleven thousand moons they are all to         
rise again, in which period the earth (which they conceive to be flat)      
will turn upside down, and by this means they shall, at their               
resurrection, be found ready standing on their feet. The learned among      
them confess the absurdity of this doctrine, but the practice still         
continues, in compliance to the vulgar.                                     
  There are some laws and customs in this empire very peculiar; and if      
they were not so directly contrary to those of my own dear country,         
I should be tempted to say a little in their justification. It is only      
to be wished that they were as well executed. The first I shall             
mention relates to informers. All crimes against the state are              
punished here with the utmost severity; but if the person accused           
makes his innocence plainly to appear upon his trial, the accuser is        
immediately put to an ignominious death; and out of his goods or            
lands, the innocent person is quadruply recompensed for the loss of         
his time, for the danger he underwent, for the hardship of his              
imprisonment, and for all the charges he had been at in making his          
defense. Or, if that fund be deficient, it is largely supplied by           
the Crown. The Emperor does also confer on him some public mark of his      
favor, and proclamation is made of his innocence through the whole          
city.                                                                       
  They look upon fraud as a greater crime than theft, and therefore         
seldom fail to punish it with death; for they allege, that care and         
vigilance, with a very common understanding, may preserve a man's           
goods from thieves, but honesty has no fence against superior cunning;      
and since it is necessary that there should be a perpetual intercourse      
of buying and selling, and dealing upon credit, where fraud is              
permitted and connived at, or has no law to punish it, the honest           
dealer is always undone, and the knave gets the advantage. remember         
when I was once interceding with the King for a criminal who had            
wronged his master of a great sum of money, which he had received by        
order, and ran away with; and happening to tell his Majesty, by way of      
extenuation, that it was only a breach of trust; the Emperor thought        
it monstrous in me to offer, as a defense, the greatest aggravation of      
the crime: and truly I had little to say in return, farther than the        
common answer, that different nations had different customs; for, I         
confess, I was heartily ashamed.                                            
                                                     {P_1|CH_6 ^paragraph 5}
  Although we usually call reward and punishment the two hinges upon        
which all government turns, yet I could never observe this maxim to be      
put in practice by any nation except that of Lilliput. Whoever can          
there bring sufficient proof that he has strictly observed the laws of      
his country for seventy-three moons, has a claim to certain                 
privileges, according to his quality and condition of life, with a          
proportionable sum of money out of a fund appropriated for that use:        
he likewise acquires the title of Snilpall, or Legal, which is added        
to his name, but does not descend to his posterity. And these people        
thought it a prodigious defect of policy among us, when I told them         
that our laws were enforced only by penalties without any mention of        
reward. It is upon this account that the image of justice, in their         
courts of judicature, is formed with six eyes, two before, as many          
behind, and on each side one, to signify circumspection; with a bag of      
gold open in her right hand, and a sword sheathed in her left, to show      
she is more disposed to reward than to punish.                              
  In choosing persons for all employments, they have more regard to         
good morals than to great abilities; for, since government is               
necessary to mankind, they believe-that the common size of human            
understandings is fitted to some station or other, and that Providence      
never intended to make the management of public affairs a mystery,          
to be comprehended only by a few persons of sublime genius, of which        
there seldom are three born in an age: but they suppose truth,              
justice, temperance, and the like, to be in every man's power; the          
practice of which virtues, assisted by experience and a good                
intention, would qualify any man for the service of his country,            
except where a course of study is required. But they thought the            
want of moral virtues was so far from being supplied by superior            
endowments of the mind, that employments could never be put into            
such dangerous hands as those of persons so qualified; and at least,        
that the mistakes committed by ignorance in a virtuous disposition,         
would never be of such fatal consequence to the public weal, as the         
practices of a man whose inclinations led him to be corrupt, and had        
great abilities to manage, and multiply, and defend his corruptions.        
  In like manner, the disbelief of a Divine Providence renders a man        
incapable of holding any public station; for, since kings avow              
themselves to be the deputies of Providence, the Lilliputians think         
nothing can be more absurd than for a prince to employ such men as          
disown the authority under which he acts.                                   
  In relating these and the following laws, I would only be understood      
to mean the original institutions, and not the most scandalous              
corruptions into which these people are fallen by the degenerate            
nature of man. For as to that infamous practice of acquiring great          
employments by dancing on the ropes, or badges of favor and                 
distinction by leaping over sticks and creeping under them, the reader      
is to observe, that they were first introduced by the grandfather of        
the Emperor now reigning, and grew to the present height by the             
gradual increase of party and faction.                                      
   Ingratitude is among them a capital crime, as we read it to have         
been in some other countries; for they reason thus, that whoever makes      
ill returns to his benefactor, must needs be a common enemy to the          
rest of mankind, from whom he has received no obligation, and               
therefore such a man is not fit to live.                                    
                                                    {P_1|CH_6 ^paragraph 10}
  Their notions relating to the duties of parents and children              
differ extremely from ours. For since the conjunction of male and           
female is founded upon the great law of nature, in order to                 
propagate and continue the species, the Lilliputians will needs have        
it, that men and women are joined together like other animals, by           
the motives of concupiscence; and that their tenderness towards             
their young proceeds from the like natural principle: for which reason      
they will never allow, that a child is under any obligation to his          
father for begetting him, or his mother for bringing him into the           
world; which, considering the miseries of human life, was neither a         
benefit itself, nor intended so by his parents, whose thoughts in           
their love-encounters were otherwise employed. Upon these, and the          
like reasonings, their opinion is, that parents are the last of all         
others to be trusted with the education of their own children: and          
therefore they have in every town public nurseries, where all parents,      
except cottagers and laborers, are obliged to send their infants of         
both sexes to be reared and educated when they come to the age of           
twenty moons, at which time they are supposed to have some rudiments        
of docility. These schools are of several kinds, suited to different        
qualities, and to both sexes. They have certain professors well             
skilled in preparing children for such a condition of life as befits        
the rank of their parents, and their own capacities as well as              
inclinations. I shall say something of the male nurseries, and then of      
the female.                                                                 
  The nurseries for males of noble or eminent birth are provided            
with grave and learned professors, and their several deputies. The          
clothes and food of the children are plain and simple. They are bred        
up in the principles of honor, justice, courage, modesty, clemency,         
religion, and love of their country; they are always employed in            
some business, except in the times of eating and sleeping, which are        
very short, and two hours for diversions, consisting of bodily              
exercises. They are dressed by men till four years of age, and then         
are obliged to dress themselves, although their quality be ever so          
great; and the women attendants, who are aged proportionably to ours        
at fifty, perform only the most menial offices. They are never              
suffered to converse with servants, but go together in small or             
greater numbers to take their diversions, and always in the presence        
of a professor, or one of his deputies; whereby they avoid those early      
bad impressions of folly and vice to which our children are subject.        
Their parents are suffered to see them only twice a year; the visit is      
to last but an hour. They are allowed to kiss the child at meeting and      
parting; but a professor, who always stands by on those occasions,          
will not suffer them to whisper, or use any fondling expressions, or        
bring any presents of toys, sweetmeats, and the like.                       
  The pension from each family for the education and entertainment          
of a child, upon failure of due payment, is levied by the Emperor's         
officers.                                                                   
  The nurseries for children of ordinary gentlemen, merchants,              
traders, and handicrafts, are managed proportionably after the same         
manner; only those designed for trades are put out apprentices at           
eleven years old, whereas those of persons of quality continue in           
their exercises till fifteen, which answers to one and twenty with us:      
but the confinement is gradually lessened for the last three years.         
  In the female nurseries, the young girls of quality are educated          
much like the males, only they are dressed by orderly servants of           
their own sex; but always in the presence of a professor or deputy,         
till they come to dress themselves, which is at five years old. And if      
it be found that these nurses ever presume to entertain the girls with      
frightful or foolish stories, or the common follies practiced by            
chambermaids among us, they are publicly whipped thrice about the           
city, imprisoned for a year and banished for life to the most desolate      
part of the country. Thus the young ladies there are as much ashamed        
of being cowards and fools as the men, and despise all personal             
ornaments beyond decency and cleanliness: neither did I perceive any        
difference in their education, made by their difference of sex, only        
that the exercises of the females were not altogether so robust; and        
that some rules were given them relating to domestic life, and a            
smaller compass of learning was enjoined them: for their maxim is,          
that among people of quality a wife should be always a reasonable           
and agreeable companion, because she cannot always be young. When           
the girls are twelve years old, which among them is the marriageable        
age, their parents or guardians take them home, with great expressions      
of gratitude to the professors, and seldom without tears of the             
young lady and her companions.                                              
                                                    {P_1|CH_6 ^paragraph 15}
  In the nurseries of females of the meaner sort, the children are          
instructed in all kinds of works proper for their sex, and their            
several degrees: those intended for apprentices are dismissed at            
nine years old, the rest are to thirteen.                                   
  The meaner families who have children at these nurseries, are             
obliged, besides their annual pension, which is as low as possible, to      
return to the steward of the nursery a small monthly share of their         
gettings, to be a portion for the child; and therefore all parents are      
limited in their expenses by the law. For the Lilliputians think            
nothing can be more unjust, than for people, in subservience to             
their own appetites, to bring children into the world and leave the         
burden of supporting them on the public. As to persons of quality,          
they give security to appropriate a certain sum for each child,             
suitable to their condition; and these funds are always managed with        
good husbandry, and the most exact justice.                                 
  The cottagers and laborers keep their children at home, their             
business being only to till and cultivate the earth, and therefore          
their education is of little consequence to the public; but the old         
and discased among them are supported by hospitals: for begging is a        
trade unknown in this kingdom.                                              
  And here it may perhaps divert the curious reader to give some            
account of my domestics, and my manner of living in this country,           
during a residence of nine months and thirteen days. Having a head          
mechanically turned, and being likewise forced by necessity, I had          
made for myself a table and chair convenient enough, out of the             
largest trees in the royal park. Two hundred seamstresses were              
employed to make me shirts, and linen for my bed and table, all of the      
strongest and coarsest kind they could get; which, however, they            
were forced to quilt together in several folds, for the thickest was        
some degrees finer than lawn. Their linen is usually three inches           
wide, and three feet make a piece. The seamstresses took my measure as      
I lay on the ground, one standing at my neck, and another at my             
mid-leg, with a strong cord extended, that each held by the end, while      
the third measured the length of the cord with a rule an inch long.         
Then they measured my right thumb, and desired no more; for by a            
mathematical computation, that twice round the thumb is once round the      
wrist, and so on to the neck and the waist, and by the help of my           
old shirt, which I displayed on the ground before them for a                
pattern, they fitted me exactly. Three hundred tailors were employed        
in the same manner to make me clothes; but they had another                 
contrivance for taking my measure. I kneeled down, and they raised a        
ladder from the ground to my neck; upon this ladder one of them             
mounted, and let fall a plumb-line from my collar to the floor,             
which just answered the length of my coat; but my waist and arms I          
measured myself. When my clothes finished, which was done in my             
house (for the largest of theirs would not have been able to hold           
them) they looked like the patch-work made by the ladies in England,        
only that mine were all of a color.                                         
  I had three hundred cooks to dress my victuals, in little convenient      
huts built about my house, where they and their families lived, and         
prepared me two dishes apiece. I took up twenty waiters in my hand,         
and placed them on the table; a hundred more attended below on the          
ground, some with dishes of meat, and some with barrels of wine, and        
other liquors, slung on their shoulders; all which the waiters above        
drew up as I wanted, in a very ingenious manner, by certain cords,          
as we draw the bucket up a well in Europe. A dish of their meat was         
a good mouthful, and a barrel of their liquor a reasonable draught.         
Their mutton yields to ours, but their beef is excellent. I have had a      
sirloin so large, that I have been forced to make three bits of it;         
but this is rare. My servants were astonished to see me eat it bones        
and all, as in our country we do the leg of a lark. Their geese and         
turkeys I usually ate at a mouthful, and I must confess they far            
exceed ours. Of their smaller fowl I could take up twenty or thirty at      
the end of my knife.                                                        
                                                    {P_1|CH_6 ^paragraph 20}
  One day his Imperial Majesty, being informed of my way of living,         
desired that himself and his Royal Consort, with the young Princes          
of the blood of both sexes, might have the happiness (as he was             
pleased to call it) of dining with me. They came accordingly, and I         
placed them upon chairs of state on my table, just over against me,         
with their guards about them. Flimnap, the Lord High Treasurer,             
attended there likewise with his white staff; and I observed he             
often looked on me with a sour countenance, which I would not seem          
to regard, but ate more than usual, in honor to my dear country, as         
well as to fill the court with admiration. I have some private reasons      
to believe, that this visit from his Majesty gave Flimnap an                
opportunity of doing me ill offices to his master. That minister had        
always been my secret enemy, though he outwardly caressed me more than      
was usual to the moroseness of his nature. He represented to the            
Emperor the low condition of his treasury; that he was forced to            
take up money at great discount; that exchequer bills would not             
circulate under nine per cent below par; that in short I had cost           
his Majesty above a million and a half of sprugs (their greatest            
gold coin, about the bigness of a spangle) and upon the whole, that it      
would be advisable in the Emperor to take the first fair occasion of        
dismissing me.                                                              
  I am here obliged to vindicate the reputation of an excellent             
lady, who was an innocent sufferer upon my account. The Treasurer took      
a fancy to be jealous of his wife, from the malice of some evil             
tongues, who informed him that her Grace had taken a violent affection      
for my person; and the court-scandal ran for some time, that she            
once came privately to my lodging. This I solemnly declare to be a          
most infamous falsehood, without any grounds, farther than that her         
Grace was pleased to treat me with all innocent marks of freedom and        
friendship. I own she came often to my house, but always publicly, nor      
ever without three more in the coach, who were usually her sister           
and young daughter, and some particular acquaintance; but this was          
common to many other ladies of the court. And I still appeal to my          
servants round, whether they at any time saw a coach at my door             
without knowing what persons were in it. On those occasions, when a         
servant had given me notice, my custom was to go immediately to the         
door; and, after paying my respects, to take up the coach and two           
horses very carefully in my hands (for if there were six horses, the        
postillion always unharnessed four) and place them on a table, where I      
had fixed a moveable rim quite round, of five inches high, to               
prevent accidents. And I have often had four coaches and horses at          
once on my table full of company, while I sat in my chair leaning my        
face towards them; and when I was engaged with one set, the coachmen        
would gently drive the others round my table. I have passed many an         
afternoon very agreeably in these conversations. But I defy the             
Treasurer, or his two informers (I will name them, and let them make        
their best of it) Clustril and Drunlo, to prove that any person ever        
came to me incognito, except the secretary Reldresal, who was sent          
by express command of his Imperial Majesty, as I have before                
related. I should not have dwelt so long upon this particular, it           
had not been a point wherein the reputation of a great lady is so           
nearly concerned, to say nothing of my own; though I then had the           
honor to be a Nardac, which the Treasurer himself is not; for all           
the world knows he is only a Glumglum, a title inferior by one degree,      
as that of a Marquis is to a Duke in England, although I allow he           
preceded me in right of his post. These false informations, which I         
afterwards came to the knowledge of, by an accident not proper to           
mention, made Flimnap the Treasurer show his lady for some time an ill      
countenance, and me a worse; and although he were at last undeceived        
and reconciled to her, yet I lost all credit with him, and found my         
interest decline very fast with the Emperor himself, who was indeed         
too much governed by that favorite.                                         
                                                                            
P_1|CH_7                                                                    
  CHAPTER VII                                                               
-                                                                           
  Before I proceed to give an account of my leaving this kingdom, it        
may be proper to inform the reader of a private intrigue which had          
been for two months forming against me.                                     
  I had been hitherto all my life a stranger to courts, for which I         
was unqualified by the meanness of my condition. I had indeed heard         
and read enough of the dispositions of great princes and ministers;         
but never expected to have found such terrible effects of them in so        
remote a country, governed, as I thought, by very different maxims          
from those in Europe.                                                       
  When I was just preparing to pay my attendance on the Emperor of          
Blefuscu, a considerable person at court (to whom I had been very           
serviceable at a time when he lay under the highest displeasure of his      
Imperial Majesty) came to my house very privately at night in a             
close chair, and without sending his name, desired admittance. The          
chairmen were dismissed; I put the chair, with his Lordship in it,          
into my coat-pocket: and giving orders to a trusty servant to say I         
was indisposed and gone to sleep, I fastened the door of my house,          
placed the chair on the table, according to my usual custom, and sat        
down by it. After the common salutations were over, observing his           
Lordship's countenance full of concern, and enquiring into the reason,      
he desired I would hear him with patience in a matter that highly           
concerned my honor and my life. His speech was to the following             
effect, for I took notes of it as soon as he left me.                       
  You are to know, said he, that several Committees of Council have         
been lately called in the most private manner on your account; and          
it is but two days since his Majesty came to a full resolution.             
  You are very sensible that Skyresh Bolgolam (Galbet, or High              
Admiral) has been your mortal enemy almost ever since your arrival.         
His original reasons I know not, but his hatred is much increased           
since your great success against Blefuscu, by which his glory as            
Admiral is obscured. This Lord, in conjunction with Flimnap the High        
Treasurer, whose enmity against you is notorious on account of his          
lady, Limtoc the General, Lalcon the Chamberlain, and Balmuff the           
Grand Justiciary, have prepared articles of impeachment against you,        
for treason, and other capital crimes.                                      
                                                     {P_1|CH_7 ^paragraph 5}
  This preface made me so impatient, being conscious of my own              
merits and innocence, that I was going to interrupt; when he entreated      
me to be silent, and thus proceeded.                                        
  Out of gratitude for the favors you have done me, I procured              
information of the whole proceedings, and a copy of the articles,           
wherein I venture my head for your service.                                 
-                                                                           
          Articles of Impeachment against Quinbus Flestrin                  
                        (the Man-Mountain)                                  
                                                    {P_1|CH_7 ^paragraph 10}
-                                                                           
                            ARTICLE I                                       
  Whereas, by a statute made in the reign of his Imperial Majesty           
Calin Deffar Plune, it is enacted, that whoever shall make water            
within the precincts of the royal palace, should be liable to the           
pains and penalties of high treason; notwithstanding, the said Quinbus      
Flestrin, in open breach of the said law, under color of extinguishing      
the fire kindled in the apartment of his Majesty's most dear                
Imperial Consort, did maliciously, traitorously, and devilishly, by         
discharge of his urine, put out the said fire kindled in the said           
apartment, lying and being within the precincts of the said royal           
palace, against the statute in that case provided, etc., against the        
duty, etc.                                                                  
-                                                                           
                            ARTICLE II.                                     
                                                    {P_1|CH_7 ^paragraph 15}
  That the said Quinbus Flestrin having brought the imperial fleet          
of Blefuscu into the royal port, and being afterwards commanded by his      
Imperial Majesty to seize all the other ships of the said empire of         
Blefuscu, and reduce that empire to a province, to be governed by a         
Viceroy from hence, and to destroy and put to death not only all the        
Big-Endian exiles, but likewise all the people of that empire, who          
would not immediately forsake the Big-Endian heresy: He, the said           
Flestrin, like a false traitor against his most Auspicious, Serene,         
Imperial Majesty, did petition to be excused from the said service          
upon pretense of unwillingness to force the consciences, or destroy         
the liberties and lives of an innocent people.                              
-                                                                           
                            ARTICLE III.                                    
  That, whereas certain ambassadors from the court of Blefuscu, to sue      
for peace in his Majesty's court: He, the said Flestrin, did, like a        
false traitor, aid, abet, comfort, and divert the said ambassadors,         
although he knew them to be servants to a Prince who was lately an          
open enemy to his Imperial Majesty, and in open war against his said        
Majesty.                                                                    
-                                                                           
                                                    {P_1|CH_7 ^paragraph 20}
                            ARTICLE IV.                                     
  That the said Quinbus Flestrin, contrary to the duty of a faithful        
subject, is now preparing to make a voyage to the court and empire          
of Blefuscu, for which he had received only verbal license from his         
Imperial Majesty; and under color of the said license, doth falsely         
and traitorously intend to take the said voyage, and hereby to aid,         
comfort, and abet the Emperor of Blefuscu, so late an enemy, and in         
open war with his Imperial Majesty aforesaid.                               
-                                                                           
  There are some other articles, but these are the most important,          
of which I have read you an abstract.                                       
  In the several debates upon this impeachment, it must be confessed        
that his Majesty gave many marks of his great lenity, often urging the      
services you had done him, and endeavoring to extenuate your crimes.        
The Treasurer and Admiral insisted that you should be put to the            
most painful and ignominious death, by setting fire on your house at        
night, and the General was to attend with twenty thousand men armed         
with poisoned arrows to shoot you on the face and hands. Some of            
your servants were to have private orders to strew a poisonous juice        
on your shirts, which would soon make you tear your own flesh, and die      
in the utmost torture. The General came into the same opinion, so that      
for a long time there was a majority against you. But his Majesty           
resolving, if possible, to spare your life, at last brought off the         
Chamberlain.                                                                
                                                    {P_1|CH_7 ^paragraph 25}
  Upon this incident, Reldresal, principal Secretary for Private            
Affairs, who always approved himself your true friend, was commanded        
by the Emperor to deliver his opinion, which he accordingly did; and        
therein justified the good thoughts you have of him. He allowed your        
crimes to be great, but that still there was room for mercy, the            
most commendable virtue in a prince, and for which his Majesty was          
so justly celebrated. He said, the friendship between you and him           
was so well known to the world, that perhaps the most honorable             
board might think him partial: however, in obedience to the command he      
had received, he would freely offer his sentiments. That if his             
Majesty, in consideration of your services, and pursuant to his own         
merciful disposition, would please to spare your life, and only give        
order to put out both your eyes, he humbly conceived that by this           
expedient justice might in some measure be satisfied, and all the           
world would applaud the lenity of the Emperor, as well as the fair and      
generous proceedings of those who have the honor to be his                  
counsellors. That the loss of your eyes would be no impediment to your      
bodily strength, by which you might still be useful to his Majesty.         
That blindness is an addition to courage, by concealing dangers from        
us; that the fear you had for your eyes was the greatest difficulty in      
bringing over the enemy's fleet, and it would be sufficient for you to      
see by the eyes of the ministers, since the greatest princes do no          
more.                                                                       
  This proposal was received with the utmost disapprobation by the          
whole board. Bolgolam, the Admiral, could not preserve his temper, but      
rising up in fury said he wondered how the Secretary dared presume          
to give his opinion for preserving the life of a traitor: that the          
services you had performed, were, by all true reasons of state, the         
great aggravation of your crimes; that you, who were able to                
extinguish the fire, by discharge of urine in her Majesty's                 
apartment (which he mentioned with horror), might at another time,          
raise an inundation by the same means, to drown the whole palace;           
and the same strength which enabled you to bring over the enemy's           
fleet, might serve, upon the first discontent, to carry it back:            
that he had good reasons to think you were a Big-Endian in your heart;      
and as treason begins in the heart, before it appears in overt acts,        
so he accused you as a traitor on that account, and therefore insisted      
you should be put to death.                                                 
  The Treasurer was of the same opinion; he showed to what straits his      
Majesty's revenue was reduced by the charge of maintaining you,             
which would soon grow insupportable: that the Secretary's expedient of      
putting out your eyes was so far from being a remedy against this           
evil, it would probably increase it, as it is manifest from the common      
practice of blinding some kind of fowl, after which they fed the            
faster, and grew sooner fat: that his sacred Majesty and the                
Council, who are your judges, were in their own consciences fully           
convinced of your guilt, which was a sufficient argument to condemn         
you to death, without the formal proofs required by the strict              
letter of the law.                                                          
  But his Imperial Majesty, fully determined against capital                
punishment, was graciously pleased to say, that since the Council           
thought the loss of your eyes too easy a censure, some other may be         
inflicted hereafter. And your friend the Secretary humbly desiring          
to be heard again, in answer to what the Treasurer had objected             
concerning the great charge his Majesty was at in maintaining you,          
said that his Excellency, who had the sole disposal of the Emperor's        
revenue, might easily provide against that evil, by gradually               
lessening your establishment; by which, for want of sufficient food,        
you would grow weak and faint, and lose your appetite, and                  
consequently decay and consume in a few months; neither would the           
stench of your carcass be then so dangerous, when it should become          
more than half diminished; and immediately upon your death, five or         
six thousand of his Majesty's subjects might, in two or three days,         
cut your flesh from your bones, take it away by cartloads, and bury it      
in distant parts to prevent infection, leaving the skeleton as a            
monument of admiration to posterity.                                        
  Thus by the great friendship of the Secretary, the whole affair           
was compromised. It was strictly enjoined, that the project of              
starving you by degrees should be kept a secret, but the sentence of        
putting out your eyes was entered on the books; none dissenting except      
Bolgolam the Admiral, who, being a creature of the Empress, was             
perpetually instigated by her Majesty to insist upon your death, she        
having borne perpetual malice against you, on account of that infamous      
and illegal method you took to extinguish the fire in her apartment.        
                                                    {P_1|CH_7 ^paragraph 30}
  In three days your friend the Secretary will be directed to come          
to your house, and read before you the articles of impeachment; and         
then to signify the great lenity and favor of his Majesty and Council,      
whereby you are only condemned to the loss of your eyes, which his          
Majesty does not question you will gratefully and humbly submit to;         
and twenty of his Majesty's surgeons will attend, in order to see           
the operation well performed, by discharging very sharp-pointed arrows      
into the balls of your eyes, as you lie on the ground.                      
  I leave to your prudence what measures you will take; and to avoid        
suspicion, I must immediately return in as private a manner as I came.      
  His Lordship did so, and I remained alone, under many doubts and          
perplexities of mind.                                                       
  It was a custom introduced by this prince and his ministry (very          
different, as I have been assured, from the practices of former times)      
that after the court had decreed any cruel execution, either to             
gratify the monarch's resentment, or the malice of a favorite, the          
Emperor always made a speech to his whole Council, expressing his           
great lenity and tenderness, as qualities known and confessed by all        
the world. This speech was immediately published through the                
kingdom; nor did anything terrify the people so much as those               
encomiums on his Majesty's mercy; because it was observed, that the         
more these praises were enlarged and insisted on, the more inhuman was      
the punishment, and the sufferer more innocent. And as to myself, I         
must confess, having never been designed for a courtier either by my        
birth or education, I was so ill a judge of things, that I could not        
discover the lenity and favor of this sentence, but conceived it            
(perhaps erroneously) rather to be rigorous than gentle. I sometimes        
thought of standing my trial, for although I could not deny the             
facts alleged in the several articles, yet I hoped they would admit of      
some extenuations. But having in my life perused many state trials,         
which I ever observed to terminate as the judges thought fit to             
direct, I dared not rely on so dangerous a decision, in so critical         
a juncture, and against such powerful enemies. Once I was strongly          
bent upon resistance, for while I had liberty, the whole strength of        
that empire could hardly subdue me, and I might easily with stones          
pelt the metropolis to pieces; but I soon rejected that project with        
horror, by remembering the oath I had made to the Emperor, the              
favors I received from him, and the high title of Nardac he                 
conferred upon me. Neither had I so soon learned the gratitude of           
courtiers, to persuade myself that his Majesty's present severities         
quitted me of all past obligations.                                         
  At last I fixed upon a resolution, for which it is probable I may         
incur some censure, and not unjustly; for I confess I owe the               
preserving of my eyes, and consequently my liberty, to my own great         
rashness and want of experience: because if I had then known the            
nature of princes and ministers, which I have since observed in many        
other courts, and their methods of treating criminals less obnoxious        
than myself, I should with great alacrity and readiness have submitted      
to so easy a punishment. But hurried on by the precipitancy of              
youth, and having his Imperial Majesty's license to pay my                  
attendance upon the Emperor of Blefuscu, I took this opportunity,           
before the three days were elapsed, to send a letter to my friend           
the Secretary, signifying my resolution of setting out that morning         
Blefuscu pursuant to the leave I had got; and without waiting for an        
answer, I went to that side of the island where our fleet lay. I            
seized a large man of war, tied a cable to the prow, and, lifting up        
the anchors, I stripped myself, put my clothes (together with my            
coverlet, which I brought under my arm) into the vessel, and drawing        
it after me between wading and swimming, arrived at the royal port          
of Blefuscu, where the people had long expected me; they lent me two        
guides to direct me to the capital city, which is of the same name.         
I held them in my hands till I came within two hundred yards of the         
gate, and desired them to signify my arrival to one of the                  
secretaries, and let him know, I there waited his Majesty's                 
commands. I had an answer in about an hour, that his Majesty, attended      
by the Royal Family, and great officers of the court, was coming out        
to receive me. I advanced a hundred yards. The Emperor and his train        
alighted from their horses, the Empress and ladies from their coaches,      
and I did not perceive they were in any fright or concern. I lay on         
the ground to kiss his Majesty's and the Empress's hand. I told his         
Majesty that I had come according to my promise, and with the               
license of the Emperor, my master, to have the honor of seeing so           
mighty a monarch, and to offer him any service in my power, consistent      
with my duty to my own prince; not mentioning a word of my disgrace,        
because I had hitherto no regular information of it, and might suppose      
myself wholly ignorant of any such design; neither could I                  
reasonably conceive that the Emperor would discover the secret while I      
was out of his power: wherein, however, it soon appeared I was              
deceived.                                                                   
                                                    {P_1|CH_7 ^paragraph 35}
  I shall not trouble the reader with the particular account of my          
reception at this court, which was suitable to the generosity of so         
great a prince; nor of the difficulties I was in for want of a house        
and bed, being forced to lie on the ground, wrapped up in my coverlet.      
                                                                            
P_1|CH_8                                                                    
  CHAPTER VIII                                                              
-                                                                           
  Three days after my arrival, walking out of curiosity to the              
northeast coast of the island, I observed, about half a league off, in      
the sea, something that looked like a boat overturned. I pulled off my      
shoes and stockings, and wading two or three hundred yards, I found         
the object to approach nearer by force of the tide; and then plainly        
saw it to be a real boat, which I supposed might, by some tempest,          
have been driven from a ship; whereupon I returned immediately towards      
the city, and desired his Imperial Majesty to lend me twenty of the         
tallest vessels he had left after the loss of his fleet, and three          
thousand seamen under the command of his Vice-Admiral. This fleet           
sailed round, while I went back the shortest way to the coast where         
I first discovered the boat; I found the tide had driven it still           
nearer. The seamen were all provided with cordage, which I had              
beforehand twisted to a sufficient strength. When the ships came up, I      
stripped myself, and waded till I came within a hundred yards of the        
boat, after which I was forced to swim till I got up to it. The seamen      
threw me the end of the cord, which I fastened to a hole in the             
forepart of the boat, and the other end to a man of war; but I found        
all my labor to little purpose; for being out of my depth, I was not        
able to work. In this necessity, I was forced to swim behind, and push      
the boat forwards as often as I could, with one of my hands; and the        
tide favoring me, I advanced so far, that I could just hold up my chin      
and feel the ground. I rested two or three minutes, and then gave           
the boat another shove, and so on till the sea was no higher than my        
arm-pits; and now the most laborious part being over, I took out my         
other cables, which were stowed in one of the ships, and fastening          
them first to the boat, and then to nine of the vessels which attended      
me; the wind being favorable, the seamen towed, and I shoved till we        
arrived within forty yards of the shore; and waiting till the tide was      
out, I got dry to the boat, and by the assistance of two thousand men,      
with ropes and engines, I made a shift to turn it on its bottom, and        
found it was but little damaged.                                            
  I shall not trouble the reader with the difficulties I was under          
by the help of certain paddles, which cost me ten days making, to           
get my boat to the royal port of Blefuscu, where a mighty concourse of      
people appeared upon my arrival, full of wonder at the sight of so          
prodigious a vessel. I told the Emperor that my good fortune had            
thrown this boat in my way, to carry me to some place from whence I         
might return into my native country, and begged his Majesty's orders        
for getting materials to fit it up, together with his license to            
depart; which, after some kind expostulations, he was pleased to            
grant.                                                                      
  I did very much wonder, in all this time, not to have heard of any        
express relating to me from our Emperor to the court of Blefuscu.           
But I was afterwards given privately to understand, that his                
Imperial Majesty, never imagining I had the least notice of his             
designs, believed I was only gone to Blefuscu in performance of my          
promise, according to the license he had given me, which was well           
known at our court, and would return in a few days when that                
ceremony was ended. But he was at last in pain at my long absence; and      
after consulting with the Treasurer, and the rest of that cabal, a          
person of quality was dispatched with the copy of the articles against      
me. This envoy had instructions to represent to the monarch of              
Blefuscu the great lenity of his master, who was content to punish          
me no farther than with the loss of my eyes; that I had fled from           
justice, and if I did not return in two hours, I should be deprived of      
my title of Nardac, and declared a traitor. The envoy further added,        
that in order to maintain the peace and amity between both empires,         
his master expected, that his brother of Blefuscu would give orders to      
have me sent back to Lilliput, bound hand and foot, to be punished          
as a traitor.                                                               
  The Emperor of Blefuscu having taken three days to consult, returned      
an answer consisting of many civilities and excuses. He said, that          
as for sending me bound, his brother knew it was impossible; that           
although I had deprived him of his fleet, yet he owed great                 
obligations to me for many good offices I had done him in making the        
peace. That however both their Majesties would soon be made easy;           
for I had found a prodigious vessel on the shore, able to carry me          
on the sea, which he had given order to fit up with my own                  
assistance and direction; and he hoped in a few weeks both empires          
would be freed from so insupportable an incumbrance.                        
  With this answer the envoy returned to Lilliput, and the monarch          
of Blefuscu related to me all that had past, offering me at the same        
time (but under the strictest confidence) his gracious protection,          
if I would continue in his service; wherein although I believed him         
sincere, yet I resolved never more to put any confidence in princes or      
ministers, where I could possibly avoid it; and therefore, with all         
due acknowledgements for his favorable intentions, I humbly begged          
to be excused. I told him that since fortune, whether good or evil,         
had thrown a vessel in my way, I was resolved to venture myself in the      
ocean, rather than be an occasion of difference between two such            
mighty monarchs. Neither did I find the Emperor at all displeased; and      
I discovered by a certain accident, that he was very glad of my             
resolution, and so were most of his ministers.                              
                                                     {P_1|CH_8 ^paragraph 5}
  These considerations moved me to hasten my departure somewhat sooner      
than I intended; to which the court, impatient to have me gone, very        
readily contributed. Five hundred workmen were employed to make two         
sails to my boat, according to my directions, by quilting thirteen          
fold of their strongest linen together. I was at the pains of making        
ropes and cables, by twisting ten, twenty or thirty of the thickest         
and strongest of theirs. A great stone that I happened to find,             
after a long search, by the sea-shore, served me for an anchor. I           
had the tallow of three hundred cows for greasing my boat, and other        
uses. I was at incredible pains in cutting down some of the largest         
timber-trees for oars and masts, wherein I was, however, much assisted      
by his Majesty's ship carpenters, who helped me in smoothing them,          
after I had done the rough work.                                            
  In about a month, when all was prepared, I sent to receive his            
Majesty's commands, and to take my leave. The Emperor and Royal Family      
came out of the palace; I lay down on my face to kiss his hand,             
which he very graciously gave me: so did the Empress and young Princes      
of the blood. His Majesty presented me with fifty purses of two             
hundred sprugs apiece, together with his picture at full length, which      
I put immediately into one of my gloves, to keep it from being hurt.        
The ceremonies at my departure were too many to trouble the reader          
with at this time.                                                          
  I stored the boat with the carcases of a hundred oxen, and three          
hundred sheep, with bread and drink proportionable, and as much meat        
ready dressed as four hundred cooks could provide. I took with me           
six cows and two bulls alive, with as many ewes and rams, intending to      
carry them into my own country, and propagate the breed. And to feed        
them on board, I had a good bundle of hay, and a bag of corn. I             
would gladly have taken a dozen of the natives, but this was a thing        
the Emperor would by no means permit; and besides a diligent search         
into my pockets, his Majesty engaged my honor not to carry away any of      
his subjects, although with their own consent and desire.                   
  Having thus prepared all things as well as I was able, I set sail on      
the twenty-fourth day of September, 1701, at six in the morning; and        
when I had gone about four leagues to the northward, the wind being at      
southeast, at six in the evening I descried a small island about            
half a league to the northwest. I advanced forward, and cast anchor on      
the leeside of the island, which seemed to be uninhabited. I then took      
some refreshment, and went to my rest. I slept well, and I                  
conjecture at least six hours, for I found the day broke in two             
hours after I awaked. It was a clear night. I ate my breakfast              
before the sun was up; and heaving anchor, the wind being favorable, I      
steered the same course that I had done the day before, wherein I           
was directed by my pocket compass. My intention was to reach, if            
possible, one of those islands, which I had reason to believe lay to        
the northeast of Van Diemen's Land. I discovered nothing all that day;      
but upon the next, about three in the afternoon, when I had by my           
computation made twenty-four leagues from Blefuscu, I descried a            
sail steering to the southeast; my course was due east. I hailed            
her, but could get no answer; yet I found I gained upon her, for the        
wind slackened. I made all the sail I could, and in half an hour she        
spied me, then hung out her ancient, and discharged a gun. It is not        
easy to express the joy I was in upon the unexpected hope of once more      
seeing my beloved country, and the dear pledges I had left in it.           
The ship slackened her sails, and I came up with her between five           
and six in the evening, September 26; but my heart leaped within me to      
see her English colors. I put my cows and sheep into my coat                
pockets, and got on board with all my little cargo of provisions.           
The vessel was an English merchantman, returning from Japan by the          
North and South Seas; the Captain, Mr. John Biddle of Deptford, a very      
civil man, and an excellent sailor. We were now in the latitude of          
30 degrees south; there were about fifty men in the ship; and here I        
met an old comrade of mine, one Peter Williams, who gave me a good          
character to the Captain. This gentleman treated me with kindness, and      
desired I would let know what place I came from last, and whither I         
was bound; which I did in few words, but he thought I was raving,           
and that the dangers I underwent had disturbed my head; whereupon I         
took my black cattle and sheep out of my pocket, which, after great         
astonishment, clearly convinced him of my veracity. I then showed           
him the gold given me by the Emperor of Blefuscu, together with his         
Majesty's picture at full length, and some other rarities of that           
country. I gave him two purses of two hundred sprugs each, and              
promised, when we arrived in England, to make him a present of a cow        
and a sheep big with young.                                                 
  I shall not trouble the reader with a particular account of this          
voyage, which was very prosperous for the most part. We arrived in the      
Downs on the 13th of April, 1702. I had only one misfortune, that           
the rats on board carried away one of my sheep; I found her bones in a      
hole, picked clean from the flesh. The rest of my cattle I got safe on      
shore, and set them grazing in a bowling-green at Greenwich, where the      
fineness of the grass made them feed very heartily, though I had            
always feared the contrary: neither could I possibly have preserved         
them in so long a voyage, if the Captain had not allowed me some of         
his best biscuit, which, rubbed to powder, and mingled with water, was      
their constant food. The short time I continued in England, I made          
considerable profit by showing my cattle to many persons of quality,        
and others: and before I began my second voyage, I sold them for six        
hundred pounds. Since my last return, I find the breed is considerably      
increased, especially the sheep; which I hope will prove much to the        
advantage of the woollen manufacture, by the fineness of the fleeces.       
                                                    {P_1|CH_8 ^paragraph 10}
  I stayed but two months with my wife and family; for my insatiable        
desire of seeing foreign countries would suffer me to continue no           
longer. I left fifteen hundred pounds with my wife, and fixed her in a      
good house at Redriff. My remaining stock I carried with me, part in        
money, and part in goods, in hopes to improve my fortunes. My eldest        
uncle John had left me an estate in land, near Epping, of about thirty      
pounds a year; and I had a long lease of the Black Bull in Fetter           
Lane, which yielded me as much more; so that I was not in any danger        
of leaving my family upon the parish. My son Johnny, named so after         
his uncle, was at the Grammar School, and a towardly child. My              
daughter Betty (who is now well married, and has children) was then at      
her needlework. I took leave of my wife, and boy and girl, with             
tears on both sides, and went on board the Adventure, a merchantship        
of three hundred tons, bound for Surat, Captain John Nicholas of            
Liverpool, Commander. But my account of this voyage must be referred        
to the second part of my Travels.                                           
-                                                                           
                       THE END OF THE FIRST PART                            
                                                                            
                                                                            
                                                                            
                                                                            
                                                                            
                                                                            
                                                                            
                                    PART II                                 
                                                                            
                            A VOYAGE TO BROBDINGNAG                         
                                                                            
                                                                            
                                  (SEE PLATE 2)                             
                                                                            
P_2|CH_1                                                                    
  CHAPTER I                                                                 
-                                                                           
  Having been condemned by nature and fortune to an active and              
restless life, in two months after my return I again left my native         
country, and took shipping in the Downs on the 20th day of June, 1702,      
in the Adventure, Captain John Nicholas, a Cornishman, Commander,           
bound for Surat. We had a very prosperous gale till we arrived at           
the Cape of Good Hope, where we landed for fresh water, but                 
discovering a leak we unshipped our goods and wintered there; for           
the Captain falling sick of an ague, we could not leave the Cape            
till the end of March. We then set sail, and had a good voyage till we      
passed the Straits of Madagascar; but having got northward of that          
island, and to about five degrees south latitude, the winds, which          
in those seas are observed to blow a constant equal gale between the        
north and west from the beginning of December to the beginning of May,      
on the 19th of April began to blow with much greater violence, and          
more westerly than usual, continuing so for twenty days together,           
during which time we were driven a little to the east of the Molucca        
Islands, and about three degrees northward of the Line, as our Captain      
found by an observation he took the 2nd of May, at which time the wind      
ceased, and it was a perfect calm, whereat I was not a little               
rejoiced. But he, being a man well experienced in the navigation of         
those seas, bid us all prepare against a storm, which accordingly           
happened the day following: for a southern wind, called the southern        
monsoon, began to set in.                                                   
  Finding it was likely to overblow, we took in our spritsail, and          
stood by to hand the foresail; but making foul weather, we looked           
the guns were all fast, and handed the mizzen. The ship lay very broad      
off, so we thought it better spooning before the sea, than trying or        
hulling. We reefed the foresail and set him, we hauled aft the              
foresheet; the helm was hard aweather. The ship wore bravely. We            
belayed the fore-down-haul; but the sail was split, and we hauled down      
the yard, and got the sail into the ship, and unbound all the things        
clear of it. It was a very fierce storm; the sea broke strange and          
dangerous. We hauled off upon the lanyard of the whipstaff, and helped      
the man at helm. We would not get down our topmast, but let all stand,      
because she scudded before the sea very well, and we knew that the          
topmast being aloft, the ship was the wholesomer, and made better           
way through the sea, seeing we had sea room. When the storm was             
over, we set foresail and mainsail, and brought the ship to: then we        
set the mizzen, main-topsail, and the fore-topsail. Our course was          
east northeast, the wind was at southwest. We got the starboard             
tacks aboard; we cast off our weather-braces and lifts; we set in           
the leebraces, and hauled forward by the weatherbowlings, and hauled        
them tight, and belayed them, and hauled over the mizzen tack to            
windward, and kept her full and by as near as she would lie.                
  During this storm, which was followed by a strong wind west               
southwest, we were carried by my computation about five hundred             
leagues to the east, so that the oldest sailor on board could not tell      
in what part of the world we were. Our provisions held out well, our        
ship was staunch, and our crew all in good health; but we lay in the        
utmost distress for water. We thought it best to hold on the same           
course, rather than turn more northerly, which might have brought us        
to the northwest parts of Great Tartary, and into the frozen sea.           
  On the 16th day of June, 1703, a boy on the topmost discovered land.      
On the 17th we came in full view of a great island or continent (for        
we knew not which) on the south side whereof was a small neck of            
land jutting out into the sea, and a creek too shallow to hold a            
ship of above one hundred tons. We cast anchor within a league of this      
creek, and our Captain sent a dozen of his men well armed in the            
longboat, with vessels for water if any could be found. I desired           
his leave to go with them, that I might see the country, and make what      
discoveries I could. When we came to land we saw no river or spring,        
nor any sign of inhabitants. Our men therefore wandered on the shore        
to find out some fresh water near the sea, and I walked alone about         
a mile on the other side, where I observed the country all barren           
and rocky. I now began to be weary, and seeing nothing to entertain my      
curiosity, I returned gently down towards the creek; and the sea being      
full in my view, I saw our men already got into the boat, and rowing        
for life to the ship. I was going to halloo after them, although it         
had been to little purpose, when I observed a huge creature walking         
after them in the sea, as fast as he could: he waded not much deeper        
than his knees, and took prodigious strides: but our men had the start      
of him half a league, and the sea thereabouts being full of                 
sharp-pointed rocks, the monster was not able to overtake the boat.         
This I was afterwards told, for I dared not stay to see the issue of        
that adventure; but ran as fast as I could the way I first went, and        
then climbed up a steep hill, which gave me some prospect of the            
country. I found it fully cultivated; but that which first surprised        
me was the length of the grass, which in those grounds that seemed          
to be kept for hay, was about twenty feet high.                             
  I fell into a high road, for so I took it to be, though it served to      
the inhabitants only as a footpath through a field of barley. Here I        
walked on for some time, but could see little on either side, it being      
now near harvest, and the corn rising at least forty feet. I was an         
hour walking to the end of this field, which was fenced in with a           
hedge of at least one hundred and twenty feet high, and the trees so        
lofty that I could make no computation of their altitude. There was         
a stile to pass from this field into the next. It had four steps,           
and a stone to cross over when you came to the uppermost. It was            
impossible for me to climb this stile, because every step was six feet      
high, and the upper stone above twenty. I was endeavoring to find some      
gap in the hedge, when I discovered one of the inhabitants in the next      
field, advancing towards the stile, of the same size with him whom I        
saw in the sea pursuing our boat. He appeared as tall as an ordinary        
spire steeple, and took about ten yards at every stride, as near as         
I could guess. I was struck with the utmost fear and astonishment, and      
ran to hide myself in the corn, from whence I saw him at the top of         
the stile, looking back into the next field on the right hand, and          
heard him call in a voice many degrees louder than a speaking trumpet:      
but the noise was so high in the air, that at first I certainly             
thought it was thunder. Whereupon seven monsters like himself came          
towards him with reaping hooks in their hands, each hook about the          
size of six scythes. These people were not so well clad as the              
first, whose servants or laborers they seemed to be. For upon some          
words he spoke, they went to reap the corn in the field where I lay. I      
kept from them at as great a distance as I could, but was forced to         
move with extreme difficulty, for the stalks of the corn were               
sometimes not above a foot distant, so that I could hardly squeeze          
my body between them. However, I made a shift to go forward till I          
came to a part of the field where the corn had been laid by the rain        
and wind. Here it was impossible for me to advance a step; for the          
stalks were so interwoven that I could not creep through, and the           
beards of the fallen ears so strong and pointed that they pierced           
through my clothes into my flesh. At the same time I heard the reapers      
not above a hundred yards behind me. Being quite dispirited with toil,      
and wholly overcome by grief and despair, I lay down between two            
ridges, and heartily wished I might there end my days. I bemoaned my        
desolate widow, and fatherless children. I lamented my own folly and        
willfulness in attempting a second voyage against the advice of all my      
friends and relations. In this terrible agitation of mind I could           
not forbear thinking of Lilliput, whose inhabitants looked upon me          
as the greatest prodigy that ever appeared in the world; where I was        
able to draw an Imperial Fleet in my hand, and perform those other          
actions which will be recorded forever in the chronicles of that            
empire, while posterity shall hardly believe them, although attested        
by millions. I reflected what a mortification it must prove to me to        
appear as inconsiderable in this nation as one single Lilliputian           
would be among us. But this I conceived was to be the least of my           
misfortunes: for as human creatures are observed to be more savage and      
cruel in proportion to their bulk, what could I expect but to be a          
morsel in the mouth of the first among these enormous barbarians            
that should happen to seize me? Undoubtedly philosophers are in the         
right when they tell us, that nothing is great or little otherwise          
than by comparison. It might have pleased fortune to let the                
Lilliputians find some nation, where the people were as diminutive          
with respect to them, as they were to me. And who knows but that            
even this prodigious race of mortals might be equally overmatched in        
some distant part of the world, whereof we have yet no discovery?           
                                                     {P_2|CH_1 ^paragraph 5}
  Scared and confounded as I was, I could not forbear going on with         
these reflections, when one of the reapers approaching within ten           
yards of the ridge where I lay, made me apprehend that with the next        
step I should be squashed to death under his foot, or cut in two            
with his reaping hook. And therefore when he was again about to             
move, I screamed as loud as fear could make me. Whereupon the huge          
creature trod short, and looking round about under him for some             
time, at last espied me as I lay on the ground. He considered a             
while with the caution of one who endeavors to lay hold on a small          
dangerous animal in such a manner that it shall not be able either          
to scratch or to bite him, as I myself have sometimes done with a           
weasel in England. At length he ventured to take me up behind by the        
middle between his forefinger and thumb, and brought me within three        
yards of his eyes, that he might behold my shape more perfectly. I          
guessed his meaning, and my good fortune gave me so much presence of        
mind, that I resolved not to struggle in the least as he held me in         
the air about sixty feet from the ground, although he grievously            
pinched my sides, for fear I should slip through his fingers. All I         
ventured was to raise my eyes towards the sun, and place my hands           
together in a supplicating posture, and to speak some words in a            
humble melancholy tone, suitable to the condition I then was in. For I      
apprehended every moment that he would dash me against the ground,          
as we usually do any little hateful animal which we have a mind to          
destroy. But my good star would have it, that he appeared pleased with      
my voice and gestures, and began to look upon me as a curiosity,            
much wondering to hear me pronounce articulate words, although he           
could not understand them. In the meantime I was not able to forbear        
groaning and shedding tears, and turning my head towards my sides;          
letting him know, as well as I could, how cruelly I was hurt by the         
pressure of his thumb and finger. He seemed to apprehend my meaning;        
for, lifting up the lappet of his coat, he put me gently into it,           
and immediately ran along with me to his master, who was a substantial      
farmer, and the same person I had first seen in the field.                  
  The farmer having (as I supposed by their talk) received such an          
account of me as his servant could give him, took a piece of a small        
straw, about the size of a walking staff, and therewith lifted up           
the lappets of my coat; which it seems he thought to be some kind of        
covering that nature had given me. He blew my hair aside to take a          
better view of my face. He called his hinds about him, and asked            
them (as I afterwards learned) whether they had ever seen in the            
fields any little creature that resembled me. He then placed me softly      
on the ground upon all four, but I got immediately up, and walked           
slowly backwards and forwards, to let those people see I had no intent      
to run away. They all sat down in a circle about me, the better to          
observe my motions. I pulled off my hat, and made a low bow towards         
the farmer. I fell on my knees, and lifted up my hands and eyes, and        
spoke several words as loud as I could: I took a purse of gold out          
of my pocket, and humbly presented it to him. He received it on the         
palm of his hand, then applied it close to his eye, to see what it          
was, and afterwards turned it several times with the point of a pin         
(which he took out of his sleeve), but could make nothing of it.            
Whereupon I made a sign that he should place his hand on the ground. I      
took the purse, and opening it, poured all the gold into his palm.          
There were six Spanish pieces of four pistoles each, beside twenty          
or thirty smaller coins. I saw him wet the tip of his little finger         
upon his tongue, and take up one of my largest pieces, and then             
another, but he seemed to be wholly ignorant what they were. He made        
me a sign to put them again into my purse, and the purse again into my      
pocket, which after offering to him several times, I thought it best        
to do.                                                                      
  The farmer by this time was convinced I must be a rational creature.      
He spoke often to me, but the sound of his voice pierced my ears            
like that of a water mill, yet his words were articulate enough. I          
answered as loud as I could, in several languages, and he often laid        
his car within two yards of me, but all in vain, for we were wholly         
unintelligible to each other. He then sent his servants to their work,      
and taking his handkerchief out of his pocket, he doubled and spread        
it on his left hand, which he placed flat on the ground, with the palm      
upwards, making me a sign to step into it, as I could easily do, for        
it was not above a foot in thickness. I thought it my part to obey,         
and for fear of falling, laid myself at length upon the                     
handkerchief, with the remainder of which he lapped me up to the            
head for further security, and in this manner carried me home to his        
house. There he called his wife, and showed me to her; but she              
screamed and ran back, as women in England do at the sight of a toad        
or a spider. However, when she had a while seen my behavior, and how        
well I observed the signs her husband made, she was soon reconciled,        
and by degrees grew extremely tender of me.                                 
  It was about twelve at noon, and a servant brought in dinner. It was      
only one substantial dish of meat (fit for the plain condition of an        
husbandman) in a dish of about twenty-four feet in diameter. The            
company were the farmer and his wife, three children, and an old            
grandmother. When they sat down, the farmer placed me at some distance      
from him on the table, which was thirty feet high from the floor. I         
was in a terrible fright, and kept as far as I could from the edge for      
fear of falling. The wife minced a bit of meat, then crumbled some          
bread on a trencher, and placed it before me. I made her a low bow,         
took out my knife and fork, and fell to eating, which gave them             
exceeding delight. The mistress sent her maid for a small dram cup,         
which held about three gallons, and filled it with drink; I took up         
the vessel with much difficulty in both hands, and in a most                
respectful manner drank to her ladyship's health, expressing the words      
as loud as I could in English, which made the company laugh so              
heartily, that I was almost deafened with the noise. This liquor            
tasted like a small cider, and was not unpleasant. Then the master          
made me a sign to come to his trencher side; but as I walked on the         
table, being in great surprise all the time, as the indulgent reader        
will easily conceive and excuse, I happened to stumble against a            
crust, and fell flat on my face, but received no hurt. I got up             
immediately, and observing the good people to be in much concern, I         
took my hat (which I held under my arm out of good manners) and waving      
it over my head, made three huzzas, to show I had gotten no mischief        
by my fall. But advancing forwards toward my master (as I shall             
henceforth call him), his youngest son who sat next him, an arch boy        
of about ten years old, took me up by the legs, and held me so high in      
the air, that I trembled every limb; but his father snatched me from        
him, and at the same time gave him such a box on the left ear, as           
would have felled an European troop of horse to the earth, ordering         
him to be taken from the table. But being afraid the boy might owe          
me a spite, and well remembering how mischievous all children among us      
naturally are to sparrows, rabbits, young kittens, and puppy dogs, I        
fell on my knees, and pointing to the boy, made my master to                
understand, as well as I could, that I desired his son might be             
pardoned. The father complied, and the lad took his seat again;             
whereupon I went to him and kissed his hand, which my master took, and      
made him stroke me gently with it.                                          
  In the midst of dinner, my mistress' favorite cat leaped into her         
lap. I heard a noise behind me like that of a dozen stocking-weavers        
at work; and turning my head, I found it proceeded from the purring of      
this animal, who seemed to be three times larger than an ox, as I           
computed by the view of her head, and one of her paws, while her            
mistress was feeding and stroking her. The fierceness of this               
creature's countenance altogether discomposed me; though I stood at         
the farther end of the table, above fifty feet off and although my          
mistress held her fast for fear she might give a spring, and seize          
me in her talons. But it happened there was no danger; for the cat          
took not the least notice of me when my master placed me within             
three yards of her. And as I have been always told, and found true          
by experience in my travels, that flying, or discovering fear way to        
make it pursue or attack you, so I resolved in this dangerous juncture      
to show no manner of concern. I walked with intrepidity five or six         
times before the very head of the cat, and came within half a yard          
of her; whereupon she drew herself back, as if she were more afraid of      
me: I had less apprehension concerning the dogs, whereof three or four      
came into the room, as it is usual in farmers' houses; one of which         
was a mastiff, equal in bulk to four elephants, and a greyhound,            
somewhat taller than the mastiff, but not so large.                         
                                                    {P_2|CH_1 ^paragraph 10}
  When dinner was almost done, the nurse came in with a Child of a          
year old in her arms, who immediately spied me, and began a squall          
that you might have heard from London Bridge to Chelsea, after the          
usual oratory of infants, to get me for a plaything. The mother out of      
pure indulgence took me up, and put me towards the child, who               
presently seized me by the middle, and got my head in his mouth, where      
I roared so loud that the urchin was frightened, and let me drop;           
and I should infallibly have broken my neck if the mother had not held      
her apron under me. The nurse to quiet her babe made use of a               
rattle, which was a kind of hollow vessel filled with great stones,         
and fastened by a cable to the childs waist: but all in vain, so            
that she was forced to apply the last remedy by giving it suck. I must      
confess no object ever disgusted me so much as the sight of her             
monstrous breast, which I cannot tell what to compare with, so as to        
give the curious reader an idea of its bulk, shape and color. It stood      
prominent six feet, and could not be less than sixteen in                   
circumference. The nipple was about half the size of my head, and           
the hue both of that and the dug so varified with spots, pimples and        
freckles, that nothing could appear more nauseous: for I had a near         
sight of her, she sitting down the more conveniently to give suck, and      
I standing on the table. This made me reflect upon the fair skins of        
our English ladies, who appear so beautiful to us, only because they        
are of our own size, and their defects not to be seen but through a         
magnifying glass, where we find by experiment that the smoothest and        
whitest skins look rough and coarse, and ill colored.                       
  I remember when I was at Lilliput, the complexion of those                
diminutive people appeared to me the fairest in the world; and talking      
upon this subject with a person of learning there, who was an intimate      
friend of mine, he said that my face appeared much fairer and smoother      
when he looked on me from the ground, than it did upon a nearer view        
when I took him up in my hand and brought him close, which he               
confessed was at first a very shocking sight. He said he could              
discover great holes in my skin; that the stumps of my beard were           
ten times stronger than the bristles of a boar, and my complexion made      
up of several colors altogether disagreeable: although I must beg           
leave to say for myself, that I am as fair as most of my sex and            
country, and very little sunburned by all my travels. On the other          
side, discoursing of the ladies in that Emperor's court, he used to         
tell me, one had freckles, another too wide a mouth, a third too large      
a nose, nothing of which I was able to distinguish. I confess this          
reflection was obvious enough; which however I could not forbear, lest      
the reader might think those vast creatures were actually deformed:         
for I must do them justice to say they are a comely race of people;         
and particularly the features of my master's countenance, although          
he were but a farmer, when I beheld him from the height of sixty feet,      
appeared very well proportioned.                                            
  When dinner was done, my master went out to his laborers, and as I        
could discover by his voice and gesture, gave his wife a strict charge      
to take care of me. I was very much tired, and disposed to sleep,           
which my mistress perceiving, she put me on her own bed, and covered        
me with a clean white handkerchief, larger and coarser than the             
mainsail of a man of war.                                                   
  I slept about two hours, and dreamed I was at home with my wife           
and children, which aggravated my sorrows when I awakened and found         
myself alone in a vast room, between two and three hundred feet             
wide, and above two hundred high, lying in a bed twenty yards wide. My      
mistress was gone about her household affairs, and had locked me in.        
The bed was eight yards from the floor. Some natural necessities            
required me to get down; I dare not presume to call, and if I had,          
it would have been in vain, with such a voice as mine, at so great a        
distance from the room where I lay to the kitchen where the family          
kept. While I was under these circumstances, two rats crept up the          
curtains, and ran smelling backwards and forwards on the bed. One of        
them came up almost to my face, whereupon I rose in a fright, and drew      
out my hanger to defend myself. These horrible animals had the              
boldness to attack me on both sides, and one of them held his               
fore-feet at my collar; but I had the good fortune to rip up his belly      
before he could do me any mischief. He fell down at my feet, and the        
other, seeing the fate of his comrade, made his escape, but not             
without one good wound on the back, which I gave him as he fled, and        
made the blood run trickling from him. After this exploit, I walked         
gently to and fro on the bed, to recover my breath and loss of              
spirits. These creatures were of the size of a large mastiff, but           
infinitely more nimble and fierce, so that if I had taken off my            
belt before I went to sleep, I must have infallibly been torn to            
pieces and devoured. I measured the tail of the dead rat, and found it      
to be two yards long, wanting an inch; but it went against my               
stomach to drag the carcass off the bed, where it lay still                 
bleeding; I observed it had yet some life, but with a strong slash          
cross the neck, I thoroughly dispatched it.                                 
  Soon after my mistress came into the room, who seeing me all bloody,      
ran and took me up in her hand. I pointed to the dead rat, smiling and      
making other signs to show I was not hurt, whereat she was extremely        
rejoiced, calling the maid to take up the dead rat with a pair of           
tongs, and throw it out of the window. Then she set me on a table,          
where I showed her my hanger all bloody, and wiping it on the lappet        
of my coat, returned it to the scabbard. I was pressed to do more than      
one thing, which another could not do for me, and therefore endeavored      
to make my mistress understand that I desired to be set down on the         
floor; which after she had done, my bashfulness would not suffer me to      
express myself farther than by pointing to the door, and bowing             
several times. The good woman with much difficulty at last perceived        
what I would be at, and taking me up again in her hand, walked into         
the garden, where she set me down. I went on one side about two             
hundred yards, and beckoning to her not to look or to follow me, I hid      
myself between two leaves of sorrel and there discharged the                
necessities of nature.                                                      
                                                    {P_2|CH_1 ^paragraph 15}
  I hope the gentle reader will excuse me for dwelling on these and         
the like particulars, which however insignificant they may appear to        
grovelling vulgar minds, yet will certainly help a philosopher to           
enlarge his thoughts and imagination, and apply them to the benefit of      
public as well as private life, which was my sole design in presenting      
this and other accounts of my travels to the world; wherein I have          
been chiefly studious of truth, without affecting any ornaments of          
learning or of style. But the whole scene of this voyage made so            
strong an impression on my mind, and is so deeply fixed in my               
memory, that in committing it to paper I did not omit one material          
circumstance: however, upon a strict review, I blotted out several          
passages of less moment which were in my first copy, for fear of being      
censured as tedious and trifling, whereof travelers are often, perhaps      
not without justice, accused.                                               
                                                                            
P_2|CH_2                                                                    
  CHAPTER II                                                                
-                                                                           
  My mistress had a daughter of nine years old, a child of forward          
parts for her age, very dextrous at her needle, and skillful in             
dressing her baby. Her mother and she contrived to fit up the baby's        
cradle for me against night: the cradle was put into a small drawer of      
a cabinet, and the drawer placed upon a hanging shelf for fear of           
the rats. This was my bed all the time I stayed with those people,          
though made more convenient by degrees, as I began to learn their           
language, and make my wants known. This young girl was so handy,            
that after I had once or twice pulled off my clothes before her, she        
was able to dress and undress me, though I never gave her that trouble      
when she would let me do either myself. She made me seven shirts,           
and some other linen, of as fine cloth as could be got, which indeed        
was coarser than sackcloth; and these she constantly washed for me          
with her own hands. She was likewise my school mistress to teach me         
the language: when I pointed to anything, she told me the name of it        
in her own tongue, so that in a few days I was able to call for             
whatever I had a mind to. She was very good-natured, and not above          
forty feet high, being little for her age. She gave me the name of          
Grildrig, which the family took up, and afterwards the whole                
kingdom. The word imports what the Latins call nanunculus the Italians      
homunceletino, and the English mannikin. To her I chiefly owe my            
preservation in that country: we never parted while I was there; I          
called her my Glumdalclitch, or little nurse: and I should be guilty        
of great ingratitude if I omitted this honorable mention of her care        
and affection towards me, which I heartily wish it lay in my power          
to requite as she deserves, instead of being the innocent but               
unhappy instrument of her disgrace, as I have too much reason to fear.      
  It now began to be known and talked of in the neighborhood, that          
my master had found a strange animal in the field, about the bigness        
of a splacknuck, but exactly shaped in every part like a human              
creature; which it likewise imitated in all its actions; seemed to          
speak in a little language of its own, had already learned several          
words of theirs, went erect upon two legs, was tame and gentle,             
would come when it was called, do whatever it was bid, had the              
finest limbs in the world, and a complexion fairer than a nobleman's        
daughter of three years old. Another farmer who lived hard by, and was      
a particular friend of my master, came on a visit on purpose to             
inquire into the truth of this story. I was immediately produced,           
and placed upon a table, where I walked as I was commanded, drew my         
hanger, put it up again, made my reverence to my master's guest, asked      
him in his own language how he did, and told him he was welcome,            
just as my little nurse had instructed me. This man, who was old and        
dim-sighted, put on his spectacles to behold me better, at which I          
could not forbear laughing very heartily, for his eyes appeared like        
the full moon shining into a chamber at two windows. Our people, who        
discovered the cause of my mirth, bore me company in laughing, at           
which the old fellow was fool enough to be angry and out of                 
countenance. He had the character of a great miser, and to my               
misfortune he well deserved it, by the cursed advice he gave my master      
to show me as a sight upon a market day in the next town, which was         
half an hour's riding, about twenty-two miles from our house. I             
guessed there was some mischief contriving, when I observed my              
master and his friend whispering long together, sometimes pointing          
at me; and my fears made me fancy that I overheard and understood some      
of their words. But the next morning Glumdalclitch, my little nurse,        
told me the whole matter, which she had cunningly picked out from           
her mother. The poor girl laid me on her bosom, and fell weeping            
with shame and grief. She apprehended some mischief would happen to me      
from rude vulgar folks, who might squeeze me to death, or break one of      
my limbs by taking me in their hands. She had also observed how modest      
I was in my nature, how nicely I regarded my honor, and what an             
indignity I should conceive it to be exposed for money as a public          
spectacle to the meanest of the people. She said, her papa and mamma        
had promised that Grildrig should be hers, but now she found they           
meant to serve her as they did last year, when they pretended to            
give her a lamb, and yet, as soon as it was fat, sold it to a butcher.      
For my own part, I may truly affirm that I was less concerned than          
my nurse. I had a strong hope which never left me, that I should one        
day recover my liberty; and as to the ignominy of being carried             
about for a monster, I considered myself to be a perfect stranger in        
the country, and that such a misfortune could never be charged upon me      
as a reproach, if ever I should return to England; since the King of        
Great Britain himself, in my condition, must have undergone the same        
distress.                                                                   
  My master, pursuant to the advice of his friend, carried me in a box      
the next market day to the neighboring town, and took along with him        
his little daughter, my nurse, upon a pillion behind him. The box           
was close on every side, with a little door for me to go in and out,        
and a few gimlet holes to let in air. The girl had been so careful          
to put the quilt of her baby's bed into it, for me to lie down on.          
However, I was terribly shaken and discomposed in this journey, though      
it were but of half an hour. For the horse went about forty feet at         
every step, and trotted so high, that the agitation was equal to the        
rising and falling of a ship in a great storm, but much more frequent.      
Our journey was somewhat further than from London to St. Albans. My         
master alighted at an inn which he used to frequent; and after              
consulting a while with the inn-keeper, and making some necessary           
preparations, he hired the Grultrud, or crier, to give notice               
through the town of a strange creature to be seen at the Sign of the        
Green Eagle, not so big as a splacknuck (an animal in that country          
very finely shaped, about six foot long) and in every part of the body      
resembling a human creature, could speak several words, and perform         
a hundred diverting tricks.                                                 
  I was placed upon a table in the largest room of the inn, which           
might be near three hundred feet square. My little nurse stood on a         
low stool close to the table, to take care of me, and direct what I         
should do. My master, to avoid a crowd, would suffer only thirty            
people at a time to see me. I walked about on the table as the girl         
commanded: she asked me questions as far as she knew my                     
understanding of the language reached, and I answered them as loud          
as I could. I turned about several times to the company, paid my            
humble respects, said they were welcome, and used some other                
speeches I had been taught. I took up a thimble filled with liquor,         
which Glumdalclitch had given me for a cup, and drank their health.         
I drew out my hanger, and flourished it after the manner of fencers in      
England. My nurse gave me part of a straw, which I exercised as a           
pike, having learned the art in my youth. I was that day shown to           
twelve sets of company, and as often forced to go over again with           
the same fopperies, till I was half dead with weariness and                 
vexation. For those who had seen me made such wonderful reports,            
that the people were ready to break down the doors to come in. My           
master for his own interest would not suffer any one to touch me            
except my nurse; and, to prevent danger, benches were set around the        
table at such a distance as put me out of everybody's reach.                
However, an unlucky schoolboy aimed a hazel nut directly at my head,        
which very narrowly missed me; otherwise, it came with so much              
violence, that it would have infallibly knocked out my brains, for          
it was almost as large as a small pumpion: but I had the                    
satisfaction to see the young rogue well beaten, and turned out of the      
room.                                                                       
  My master gave public notice that he would show me again the next         
market day, and in the meantime he prepared a more convenient               
vehicle for me, which he had reason enough to do; for I was so tired        
with my first journey, and with entertaining company for eight hours        
together, that I could hardly stand upon my legs or speak a word. It        
was at least three days before I recovered my strength; and that I          
might have no rest at home, all the neighboring gentlemen from a            
hundred miles around, hearing of my fame, came to see me at my              
master's own house. There could not be fewer than thirty persons            
with their wives and children (for the country is very populous);           
and my master demanded the rate of a full room whenever he showed me        
at home, although it were only to a single family; so that for some         
time I had but little ease every day of the week (except Wednesday,         
which is their Sabbath) although I were not carried to the town.            
                                                     {P_2|CH_2 ^paragraph 5}
  My master, finding how profitable I was likely to be, resolved to         
carry me to the most considerable cities of the kingdom. Having             
therefore provided himself with all things necessary for a long             
journey, and settled his affairs at home, he took leave of his wife,        
and upon the 17th of August, 1703, about two months after my                
arrival, we set out for the metropolis, situated near the middle of         
that empire, and about three thousand miles distance from our house.        
My master made his daughter Glumdalclitch ride behind him. She carried      
me on her lap in a box tied about her waist. The girl had lined it          
on all sides with the softest cloth she could get, well quilted             
underneath, furnished it with her baby's bed, provided me with linen        
and other necessaries, and made everything as convenient as she could.      
We had no other company but a boy of the house, who rode after us with      
the luggage.                                                                
  My master's design was to show me in all the towns by the way, and        
to step out of the road for fifty or a hundred miles, to any village        
or person of quality's house where he might expect custom. We made          
easy journeys of not above seven or eight score miles a day: for            
Glumdalclitch, on purpose to spare me, complained she was tired with        
the trotting of the horse. She often took me out of my box at my own        
desire, to give me air and show me the country, but always held me          
fast by a leading string. We passed over five or six rivers many            
degrees broader and deeper than the Nile or the Ganges; and there           
was hardly a rivulet so small as the Thames at London Bridge. We            
were ten weeks in our journey, and I was shown in eighteen large towns      
besides many villages and private families.                                 
  On the 26th day of October, we arrived at the metropolis, called          
in their language Lorbrulgrud, or Pride of the Universe. My master          
took a lodging in the principal street of the city, not far from the        
royal palace, and put out bills in the usual form, containing an exact      
description of my person and parts. He hired a large room between           
three and four hundred feet wide. He provided a table sixty feet in         
diameter, upon which I was to act my part, and palisadoed it around         
three feet from the edge, and as many high, to prevent my falling           
over. I was shown ten times a day to the wonder and satisfaction of         
all people. I could now speak the language tolerably well, and              
perfectly understood every word that was spoken to me. Besides, I           
had learned their alphabet, and could make a shift to explain a             
sentence here and there; for Glumdalclitch had been my instructor           
while we were at home, and at leisure hours during our journey. She         
carried a little book in her pocket, not much larger than a Sanson's        
Atlas; it was a common treatise for the use of young girls, giving a        
short account of their religion: out of this she taught me my letters,      
and interpreted the words.                                                  
                                                                            
P_2|CH_3                                                                    
  CHAPTER III                                                               
-                                                                           
  The frequent labors I underwent every day made in a few weeks a very      
considerable change in my health: the more my master got by me, the         
more unsatiable he grew. I had quite lost my stomach, and was almost        
reduced to a skeleton. The farmer observed it, and concluding I soon        
must die, resolved to make as good a hand of me as he could. While          
he was thus reasoning and resolving with himself, a Slardral, or            
Gentleman Usher, came from court, commanding my master to carry me          
immediately thither for the diversion of the Queen and her ladies.          
Some of the latter had already been to see me, and reported strange         
things of my beauty, behavior, and good sense. Her Majesty and those        
who attended her were beyond measure delighted with my demeanor. I          
fell on my knees, and begged the honor of kissing her Imperial foot;        
but this gracious princess held out her little finger towards me            
(after I was set on a table) which I embraced in both my arms, and put      
the tip of it with the utmost respect to my lip. She made me some           
general questions about my country and my travels, which I answered as      
distinctly and in as few words as I could. She asked whether I would        
be content to live at court. I bowed down to the board of the table,        
and humbly answered, that I was my master's slave, but if I were at my      
own disposal, I should be proud to devote my life to her Majesty's          
service. She then asked my master whether he were willing to sell me        
at a good price. He, who apprehended I could not live a month, was          
ready enough to part with me, and demanded a thousand pieces of             
gold, which were ordered him on the spot, each piece being about the        
bigness of eight hundred moidores; but, allowing for the proportion of      
all things between that country and Europe, and the high price of gold      
among them, was hardly so great a sum as a thousand guineas would be        
in England. I then said to the Queen, since I was now her Majesty's         
most humble creature and vassal, I must beg the favor, that                 
Glumdalclitch, who had always tended me with so much care and               
kindness, and understood to do it so well, might be admitted into           
her service, and continue to be my nurse and instructor. Her Majesty        
agreed to my petition, and easily got the farmer's consent, who was         
glad enough to have his daughter preferred at court: and the poor girl      
herself was not able to hide her joy. My late master withdrew, bidding      
me farewell, and saying he had left me in a good service; to which I        
replied not a word, only making him a slight bow.                           
  The Queen observed my coldness, and when the farmer was gone out          
of the apartment, asked me the reason. I made bold to tell her Majesty      
that I owed no other obligation to my late master, than his not             
dashing out the brains of a poor harmless creature found by chance          
in his field; which obligation was amply recompensed by the gain he         
had made in showing me through half the kingdom, and the price he           
had now sold me for. That the life I had since led was laborious            
enough to kill an animal of ten times my strength. That my health           
was much impaired by the continual drudgery of entertaining the rabble      
every hour of the day, and that if my master had not thought my life        
in danger, her Majesty perhaps would not have got so cheap a                
bargain. But as I was out of all fear of being ill treated under the        
protection of so great and good an Empress, the Ornament of Nature,         
the Darling of the World, the Delight of her Subjects, the Phoenix          
of the Creation; so I hoped my late master's apprehensions would            
appear to be groundless, for I already found my spirits to revive by        
the influence of her most august presence.                                  
  This was the sum of my speech, delivered with great improprieties         
and hesitation; the latter part was altogether framed in the style          
peculiar to that people, whereof I learned some phrases from                
Glumdalclitch, while she was carrying me to court.                          
  The Queen giving great allowance for my defectiveness in speaking,        
was however surprised at so much wit and good sense in so diminutive        
an animal. She took me in her own hand, and carried me to the King,         
who was then retired to his cabinet. His Majesty, a prince of much          
gravity, and austere countenance, not well observing my shape at first      
view, asked the Queen after a cold manner, how long it was since she        
grew fond of a splacknuck; for such it seems he took me to be, as I         
lay upon my breast in her Majesty's right hand. But this princess, who      
has an infinite deal of wit and humor, set me gently on my feet upon        
the scrutore, and commanded me to give his Majesty an account of            
myself, which I did in a very few words; and Glumdalclitch, who             
attended at the cabinet door, and could not endure I should be out          
of her sight, being admitted, confirmed all that had passed from my         
arrival at her father's house.                                              
  The King, although he be as learned a person as any in his                
dominions, and had been educated in the study of philosophy, and            
particularly mathematics; yet when he observed my shape exactly, and        
saw me walk erect, before I began to speak, conceived I might be a          
piece of clockwork (which is in that country arrived to a very great        
perfection), contrived by some ingenious artist. But when he heard          
my voice, and found what I delivered to be regular and rational, he         
could not conceal his astonishment. He was by no means satisfied            
with the relation I gave him of the manner I came into his kingdom,         
but thought it a story concerted between Glumdalclitch and her father,      
who had taught me a set of words to make me sell at a higher price.         
Upon this imagination he put several other questions to me, and             
still received rational answers, no otherwise defective than by a           
foreign accent, and an imperfect knowledge in the language, with            
some rustic phrases which I had learned at the farmer's house, and did      
not suit the polite style of a court.                                       
                                                     {P_2|CH_3 ^paragraph 5}
  His Majesty sent for three great scholars who were then in their          
weekly waiting, according to the custom in that country. These              
gentlemen, after they had awhile examined my shape with much nicety,        
were of different opinions concerning me. They all agreed that I could      
not be produced according to the regular laws of nature, because I was      
not framed with a capacity of preserving my life, either by swiftness,      
or climbing of trees, or digging holes in the earth. They observed          
by my teeth, which they viewed with great exactness, that I was a           
carnivorous animal; yet most quadrupeds being an overmatch for me, and      
field mice, with some others, too nimble, they could not imagine how I      
should be able to support myself, unless I fed upon snails and other        
insects, which they offered, by many learned arguments, to evince that      
I could not possibly do. One of these virtuosi seemed to think that         
I might be an embryo, or abortive birth. But this opinion was rejected      
by the other two, who observed my limbs to be perfect and finished,         
and that I had lived several years, as it was manifested from my            
beard, the stumps whereof they plainly discovered through a magnifying      
glass. They would not allow me to be a dwarf, because my littleness         
was beyond all degrees of comparison; for the Queen's favorite              
dwarf, the smallest ever known in that kingdom, was nearly thirty feet      
high. After much debate, they concluded unanimously that I was only         
relplum scalcath, which is interpreted literally, lusus naturae; a          
determination exactly agreeable to the modern philosophy of Europe,         
whose professors, disdaining the old evasion of occult causes, whereby      
the followers of Artistotle endeavor in vain to disguise their              
ignorance, have invented this wonderful solution of all                     
difficulties, to the unspeakable advancement of human knowledge.            
  After this decisive conclusion, I entreated to be heard a word or         
two. I applied myself to the King, and assured his Majesty, that I          
came from a country which abounded with several millions of both            
sexes, and of my own stature; where the animals, trees, and houses          
were all in proportion, and where by consequence I might be as able to      
defend myself, and to find sustenance, as any of his Majesty's              
subjects could do here; which I took for a full answer to those             
gentlemen's arguments. To this they only replied with a smile of            
contempt, saying that the farmer had instructed me very well in my          
lesson. The King, who had a much better understanding, dismissing           
his learned men, sent for the farmer, who by good fortune was not           
yet gone out of town. Having therefore first examined him privately,        
and then confronted him with me and the young girl, his Majesty             
began to think that what we told him might possibly be true. He             
desired the Queen to order that a particular care should be taken of        
me, and was of opinion that Glumdalclitch should still continue in her      
office of tending me, because he observed we had a great affection for      
each other. A convenient apartment was provided for her at court;           
she had a sort of governess appointed to take care of her education, a      
maid to dress her, and two other servants for menial offices; but           
the care of me was wholly appropriated to herself. The Queen commanded      
her own cabinet maker to contrive a box that might serve me for a           
bedchamber, after the model that Glumdalclitch and I should agree           
upon. This man was a most ingenious artist, and according to my             
directions, in three weeks finished for me a wooden chamber of sixteen      
feet square, and twelve high, with sash windows, a door, and two            
closets, like a London bedchamber. The board that made the ceiling was      
to be lifted up and down by two hinges, to put in a bed ready               
furnished by her Majesty's upholsterer, which Glumdalclitch took out        
every day to air, made it with her own hands, and letting it down at        
night, locked up the roof over me. A nice workman, who was famous           
for little curiosities, undertook to make me two chairs, with backs         
and frames, of a substance not unlike ivory, and two tables, with a         
cabinet to put my things in. The room was quilted on all sides, as          
well as the floor and the ceiling, to prevent any accident from the         
carelessness of those who carried me, and to break the force of a jolt      
when I went in a coach. I desired a lock for my door, to prevent            
rats and mice from coming in: the smith, after several attempts,            
made the smallest that ever was seen among them, for I have known a         
larger at the gate of a gentleman's house in England. I made a shift        
to keep the key in a pocket of my own, fearing Glumdalclitch might          
lose it. The Queen likewise ordered the thinnest silks that could be        
gotten, to make me clothes, not much thicker than an English                
blanket, very cumbersome till I was accustomed to them. They were           
after the fashion of the kingdom, partly resembling the Persian, and        
partly the Chinese, and are a very grave and decent habit.                  
  The Queen became so fond of my company, that she could not dine           
without me. I had a table placed upon the same at which her Majesty         
ate, just at her left elbow, and a chair to sit on. Glumdalclitch           
stood upon a stool on the floor, near my table, to assist and take          
care of me. I had an entire set of silver dishes and plates, and other      
necessaries, which, in proportion to those of the Queen, were not much      
bigger than what I have seen of the same kind in a London toy shop,         
for the furniture of a babyhouse: these my little nurse kept in her         
pocket in a silver box, and gave me at meals as I wanted them,              
always cleaning them herself. No person dined with the Queen but the        
two Princesses Royal, the elder sixteen years old, and the younger          
at that time thirteen and a month. Her Majesty used to put a bit of         
meat upon one of my dishes, out of which I carved for myself, and           
her diversion was to see me eat in miniature. For the Queen (who had        
indeed but a weak stomach) took up at one mouthful as much as a             
dozen English farmers could eat at a meal, which to me was for some         
time a very nauseous sight. She would crunch the wing of a lark, bones      
and all, between her teeth, although it were nine times as large as         
that of a full grown turkey; and put a bit of bread into her mouth, as      
big as two twelve-penny loaves. She drank out of a golden cup, above a      
hogshead at a draught. Her knives were twice as long as a scythe set        
straight upon the handle. The spoons, forks, and other instruments          
were all in the same proportion. I remember when Glumdalclitch carried      
me out of curiosity to see some of the tables at court, where ten or a      
dozen of these enormous knives and forks were lifted up together, I         
thought I had never till then beheld so terrible a sight.                   
  It is the custom that every Wednesday (which, as I have before            
observed, was their Sabbath) the King and Queen, with the royal             
issue of both sexes, dine together in the apartment of his Majesty, to      
whom I was now become a great favorite; and at these times my little        
chair and table were placed at his left hand, before one of the salt        
cellars. This prince took a pleasure in conversing with me,                 
inquiring into the manners, religion, laws, government, and learning        
of Europe; wherein I gave him the best account I was able. His              
apprehension was so clear, and his judgment so exact, that he made          
very wise reflections and observations upon all I said. But, I              
confess, that after I had been a little too copious in talking of my        
own beloved country, of our trade, and wars by sea and land, of our         
schisms in religion, and parties in the state, the prejudices of his        
education prevailed so far, that he could not forbear taking me up          
in his right hand, and stroking me gently with the other, after an          
hearty fit of laughing, asked me whether I were a Whig or a Tory. Then      
turning to his first minister, who waited behind him with a white           
staff, near as tall as the mainmast of the Royal Sovereign, he              
observed how contemptible a thing was human grandeur, which could be        
mimicked by such diminutive insects as I: and yet, said he, I dare          
engage, these creatures have their titles and distinctions of honor,        
they contrive little nests and burrows, that they call houses and           
cities; they make a figure in dress and equipage; they love, they           
fight, they dispute, they cheat, they betray. And thus he continued         
on, while my color came and went several times with indignation to          
hear our noble country, the mistress of arts and arms, the scourge          
of France, the arbitress of Europe, the seat of virtue, piety, honor        
and truth, the pride and envy of the world, contemptuously treated.         
  But as I was not in a condition to resent injuries, so, upon              
mature thoughts, I began to doubt whether I were injured or not.            
For, after having been accustomed several months to the sight and           
converse of this people, and observed every object upon which I cast        
my eyes to be of proportionable magnitude, the horror I had first           
conceived from their bulk and aspect was so far worn off, that if I         
had then beheld a company of English lords and ladies in their              
finery and best day clothes, acting their several parts in the most         
courtly manner, of strutting, and bowing, and prating, to say the           
truth, I should have been strongly tempted to laugh as much at them as      
the King and his grandees did at me. Neither indeed could I forbear         
smiling at myself, when the Queen used to place me upon her hand            
towards a looking glass, by which both our persons appeared before          
me in full view together! and there could be nothing more ridiculous        
than the comparison; so that I really began to imagine myself dwindled      
many degrees below my usual size.                                           
                                                    {P_2|CH_3 ^paragraph 10}
  Nothing angered and mortified me so much as the Queen's dwarf, who        
being of the lowest stature that was ever that country (for I verily        
think he was not thirty feet high) became insolent at seeing a              
creature so much beneath him, that he would always affect to swagger        
and look big as he passed by me in the Queen's antechamber, while I         
was standing on some table talking with the lords or ladies of the          
court, and he seldom failed of a smart word or two upon my littleness;      
against which I could only revenge myself by calling him brother,           
challenging him to wrestle, and such repartees as are usual in the          
mouths of court pages. One day at dinner this malicious little cub was      
so nettled with something I had said to him, that raising himself upon      
the frame of her Majesty's chair, he took me up by the middle, as I         
was sitting down, not thinking any harm, and let me drop into a             
large silver bowl of cream, and then ran away as fast as he could. I        
fell over head and ears, and if I had not been a good swimmer, it           
might have gone very hard with me; for Glumdalclitch in that instant        
happened to be at the other end of the room, and the Queen was in such      
a fright that she wanted presence of mind to assist me. But my              
little nurse ran to my relief, and took me out, after I had                 
swallowed above a quart of cream. I was put to bed; however, I              
received no other damage than the loss of a suit of clothes, which was      
utterly spoiled. The dwarf was soundly whipped, and as a farther            
punishment, forced to drink up the bowl of cream, into which he had         
thrown me; neither was he ever restored to favor; for soon after the        
Queen bestowed him to a lady of high quality, so that I saw him no          
more, to my very great satisfaction; for I could not tell to what           
extremity such a malicious urchin might have carried his resentment.        
  He had before served me a scurvy trick, which set the Queen a             
laughing, although at the same time she was heartily vexed, and             
would have immediately cashiered him, if I had not been so generous as      
to intercede. Her Majesty had taken a marrow bone upon her plate,           
and after knocking out the marrow, placed the bone again in the dish        
erect as it stood before; the dwarf watching his opportunity, while         
Glumdalclitch was gone to the sideboard, mounted upon the stool she         
stood on to take care of me at meals, took me up in both hands, and         
squeezing my legs together, wedged them into the marrow bone above          
my waist, where I stuck for some time, and made a very ridiculous           
figure. I believe it was near a minute before any one knew what was         
become of me, for I thought it below me to cry out. But, as princes         
seldom get their meat hot, my legs were not scalded, only my stockings      
and breeches in a sad condition. The dwarf at my entreaty had no other      
punishment than a sound whipping.                                           
  I was frequently rallied by the Queen upon account of my                  
fearfulness, and she used to ask me whether the people of ray               
country were as great cowards as myself. The occasion was this. The         
kingdom is much pestered with flies in summer; and these odious             
insects, each of them as big as a Dunstable lark, hardly gave me any        
rest while I sat at dinner, with their continual humming and buzzing        
about my ears. They would sometimes alight upon my victuals; and leave      
their loathsome excrement or spawn behind, which to me was very             
visible, though not to the natives of that country, whose large optics      
were not so acute as mine in viewing smaller objects. Sometimes they        
would fix upon my nose or forehead, where they stung me to the              
quick, smelling very offensively, and I could easily trace that             
viscous matter, which our naturalists tell us enables those                 
creatures to walk with their feet upwards upon a ceiling. I had much        
ado to defend myself against these detestable animals, and could not        
forbear starting when they came on my face. It was the common practice      
of the dwarf to catch a number of these insects in his hand, as             
schoolboys do among us, and let them out suddenly under my nose, on         
purpose to frighten me, and divert the Queen. My remedy was to cut          
them in pieces with my knife as they flew in the air, wherein my            
dexterity was much admired.                                                 
  I remember one morning when Glumdalclitch had set me in my box            
upon a window, as she usually did in fair days to give me air (for I        
dared not venture to let the box be hung on a nail out of the               
window, as we do with cages in England) after I had lifted up one of        
my sashes, and sat down at my table to eat a piece of sweet cake for        
my breakfast, above twenty wasps, allured by the smell, came flying         
into the room, humming louder than the drones of as many bagpipes.          
Some of them seized my cake, and carried it piecemeal away, others          
flew about my head and face, confounding me with the noise, and             
putting me in the utmost terror of their stings. However I had the          
courage to rise and draw my hanger, and attack them in the air. I           
dispatched four of them, but the rest got away, and I presently shut        
my window. These insects were as large as partridges: I took out their      
stings, found them an inch and a half long, and as sharp as needles. I      
carefully preserved them all, and having since shown them with some         
other curiosities in several parts of Europe, upon my return to             
England I gave three of them to Gresham College, and kept the fourth        
for myself.                                                                 
                                                                            
P_2|CH_4                                                                    
  CHAPTER IV                                                                
-                                                                           
  I now intend to give the reader a short description of this country,      
as far as I traveled in it, which was not above two thousand miles          
round Lorbrulgrud, the metropolis. For the Queen, whom I always             
attended, never went further when she accompanied the King in his           
progresses, and there stayed until his Majesty returned from viewing        
his frontiers. The whole extent of this prince's dominions reaches          
about six thousand miles in length, and from three to five in breadth.      
From whence I cannot but conclude that our geographers of Europe are        
in a great error, by supposing nothing but sea between Japan and            
California; for it was ever my opinion, that there must be a balance        
of earth to counterpoise the great continent of Tartary; and therefore      
they ought to correct their maps and charts, by joining this vast           
tract of land to the northwest parts of America, wherein I shall be         
ready to lend them my assistance.                                           
  The kingdom is a peninsula, terminated to the northeast by a ridge        
of mountains thirty miles high, which are altogether impassable by          
reason of the volcanoes upon the tops. Neither do the most learned          
know what sort of mortals inhabit beyond those mountains, or whether        
they be inhabited at all. On the three other sides it is bounded by         
the ocean. There is not one seaport in the whole kingdom, and those         
parts of the coasts into which the rivers issue are so full of pointed      
rocks, and the sea generally so rough, that there is no venturing with      
the smallest of their boats, so that these people are wholly                
excluded from any commerce with the rest of the world. But the large        
rivers are full of vessels, and abound with excellent fish, for they        
seldom get any from the sea because the sea fish are of the same            
size with those in Europe, and consequently not worth catching;             
whereby it is manifest, that nature, in the production of plants and        
animals of so extraordinary a bulk, is wholly confined to this              
continent, of which I leave the reasons to be determined by                 
philosophers. However, now and then they take a whale that happens          
to be dashed against the rocks, which the common people feed on             
heartily. These whales I have known so large that a man could hardly        
carry one upon his shoulders; and sometimes for curiosity they are          
brought in hampers to Lorbrulgrud: I saw one of them in a dish at           
the King's table, which passed for a rarity, but I did not observe          
he was fond of it; for I think indeed the bigness disgusted him,            
although I have seen one somewhat larger in Greenland.                      
  The country is well inhabited, for it contains fifty-one cities,          
near a hundred walled towns, and a great number of villages. To             
satisfy my curious reader, it may be sufficient to describe                 
Lorbrulgrud. This city stands upon almost two equal parts on each side      
the river that passes through. It contains above eighty thousand            
houses, and about six hundred thousand inhabitants. It is in length         
three glonglungs (which make about fifty-four English miles) and two        
and a half in breadth, as I measured it myself in the royal map made        
by the King's order, which was laid on the ground on purpose for me,        
and extended a hundred feet; I paced the diameter and circumference         
several times barefoot, and computing by the scale, measured it pretty      
exactly.                                                                    
  The King's palace is no regular edifice, but a heap of building           
about seven miles around: the chief rooms are generally two hundred         
and forty feet high, and broad and long proportion. A coach was             
allowed to Glumdalclitch and me, wherein her governess frequently took      
her out to see the town, or go among the shops; and I was always of         
the party, carried in my box; although the girl at my own desire would      
often take me out, and hold me in her hand, that I might more               
conveniently view the houses and the people, as we passed along the         
streets. I reckoned our coach to be about a square of Westminster           
Hall, but not altogether so high; however, I cannot be very exact. One      
day the governess ordered our coachman to stop at several shops, where      
the beggars, watching their opportunity, crowded to the sides of the        
coach, and gave me the most horrible spectacles that ever an English        
eye beheld. There was a woman with a cancer in her breast, swelled          
to a monstrous size, full of holes, in two or three of which I could        
have easily crept, and covered my whole body. There was a fellow            
with a wen in his neck, larger than five wool-packs, and another            
with a couple of wooden legs, each about twenty feet high. But the          
most hateful sight of all was the lice crawling on their clothes. I         
could see distinctly the limbs of these vermin with my naked eye, much      
better than those of an European louse through a microscope, and their      
snouts with which they rooted like swine. They were the first I had         
ever beheld, and I should have been curious enough to dissect one of        
them, if I had proper instruments (which I unluckily left behind me in      
the shop) although indeed the sight was so nauseous, that it perfectly      
turned my stomach.                                                          
  Besides the large box in which I was usually carried, the Queen           
ordered a smaller one to be made for me, of about twelve feet               
square, and ten high, for the convenience of traveling, because the         
other was somewhat too large for Glumdalclitch's lap, and cumbersome        
in the coach; it was made by the same artist, whom I directed in the        
whole contrivance. This traveling closet was an exact square with a         
window in the middle of three of the squares, and each window was           
latticed with iron wire on the outside, to prevent accidents in long        
journeys. On the fourth side, which had no window, two strong               
staples were fixed, through which the person that carried me, when I        
had a mind to be on horseback, put in a leathern belt, and buckled          
it about his waist. This was always the office of some grave trusty         
servant in whom I could confide, whether I attended the King and Queen      
in their progresses, or were disposed to see the gardens, or pay a          
visit to some great lady or minister of state in the court, when            
Glumdalclitch happened to be out of order: for I soon began to be           
known and esteemed among the greatest officers, I suppose more upon         
account of their Majesties' favor, than any merit of my own. In             
journeys, when I was weary of the coach, a servant on horseback             
would buckle my box, and place it on a cushion before him; and there I      
had a full prospect of the country on three sides from my three             
windows. I had in this closet a field bed and a hung from the ceiling,      
two chairs and a table, neatly screwed to the floor, to prevent             
being tossed about by the agitation of the horse or the coach. And          
having been long used to sea voyages, those motions, although               
sometimes very violent, did not much discompose me.                         
                                                     {P_2|CH_4 ^paragraph 5}
  Whenever I had a mind to see the town, it was always in my traveling      
closet, which Glumdalclitch held in her lap in a kind of open sedan,        
after the fashion of the country, borne by four men, and attended by        
two others in the Queen's livery. The people who had often heard of         
me, were very curious to crowd about the sedan, and the girl was            
complaisant enough to make the bearers stop, and to take me in her          
hand that I might be more conveniently seen.                                
  I was very desirous to see the chief temple, and particularly the         
tower belonging to it, which is reckoned the highest in the kingdom.        
Accordingly, one day my nurse carried me thither, but I may truly           
say I came back disappointed; for height is not above three thousand        
feet, reckoning from the ground to the highest pinnacle top; which          
allowing for the difference between the size of those people and us in      
Europe, is no great matter for admiration, nor at all equal in              
proportion (if I rightly remember) to Salisbury steeple. But, not to        
detract from a nation to which during my life I shall acknowledge           
myself extremely obliged, it must be allowed that whatever this famous      
tower wants in height is amply made up in beauty and strength. For the      
walls are near a hundred feet thick, built of hewn stone, whereof each      
is about forty feet square, and adorned on all sides with statues of        
gods and emperors cut in marble larger than the life, placed in             
their several niches. I measured a little finger which had fallen down      
from one of these statues, and lay unperceived among some rubbish, and      
found it exactly four feet and an inch in length. Glumdalclitch             
wrapped it up in a handkerchief, and carried it home in her pocket          
to keep among other trinkets, of which the girl was very fond, as           
children at her age usually are.                                            
  The King's kitchen is indeed a noble building, vaulted at top, and        
about six hundred feet high. The great oven is not so wide by ten           
yards as the cupola at St. Paul's; for I measured the latter on             
purpose after my return. But if I should describe the kitchen grate,        
the prodigious pots and kettles, the joints of meat turning on the          
spits, with many other particulars, perhaps I should be hardly              
believed; at least a severe critic would be apt to think I enlarged         
a little, as travelers are often suspected to do. To avoid which            
censure, I fear I have run too much into the other extreme; and that        
if this treatise should happen to be translated into the language of        
Brobdingnag (which is the general name of that kingdom) and                 
transmitted thither, the King and his people would have reason to           
complain that I had done them an injury by a false and diminutive           
representation.                                                             
  His Majesty seldom keeps above six hundred horses in his stables:         
they are generally from fifty-four to sixty feet high. But when he          
goes abroad on solemn days, he is attended for state by a militia           
guard of five hundred horse, which indeed I thought was the most            
splendid sight that could be ever beheld, till I saw part of his            
army in battalia, whereof I shall find another occasion to speak.           
                                                                            
P_2|CH_5                                                                    
  CHAPTER V                                                                 
-                                                                           
  I should have lived happy enough in that country, if my littleness        
had not exposed me to several ridiculous and troublesome accidents,         
some of which I shall venture to relate. Glumdalclitch often carried        
me into the gardens of the court in my smaller box, and would               
sometimes take me out of it and hold me in her hand, or set me down to      
walk. I remember, before the dwarf left the Queen, he followed us           
one day into those gardens, and my nurse having set me down, he and         
I being close together, near some dwarf apple trees, I must needs show      
my wit by a silly allusion between him and the trees, which happens to      
hold in their language as it does in ours. Whereupon, the malicious         
rogue watching his opportunity, when I was walking under one of             
them, shook it directly over my head, by which a dozen apples, each of      
them near as large as a Bristol barrel, came tumbling about my ears;        
one of them hit me on the back as I chanced to stoop, and knocked me        
down flat on my face, but I received no other hurt, and the dwarf           
was pardoned at my desire, because I had given the provocation.             
  Another day Glumdalclitch left me on a smooth grass plot to divert        
myself while she walked at some distance with her governess. In the         
meantime there suddenly fell such a violent shower of hail, that I was      
immediately by the force of it struck to the ground: and when I was         
down, the hailstones gave me such cruel bangs all over the body, as if      
I had been pelted with tennis balls; however, I made a shift to             
creep on all fours, and shelter myself by lying flat on my face on the      
lee side of a border of lemon thyme, but so bruised from head to            
foot that I could not go abroad in ten days. Neither is this at all to      
be wondered at, because nature in that country observing the same           
proportion through all her operations, a hailstone is near eighteen         
hundred times as large as one in Europe, which I can assert upon            
experience, having been so curious to weigh and measure them.               
  But a more dangerous accident happened to me in the same garden,          
when my little nurse believing she had put me in a secure place, which      
I often entreated her to do, that might enjoy my own thoughts, and          
having left my box at home to avoid the trouble of carrying it, went        
to another part of the garden with her governess and some ladies of         
her acquaintance. While she was absent and out of hearing, a small          
white spaniel belonging to one of the chief gardeners, having got by        
accident into the garden, happened to range near the place where I          
lay. The dog following the scent, came directly up, and taking me in        
his mouth, ran straight to his master, wagging his tail, and set me         
gently on the ground. By good fortune he had been so well taught, that      
I was carried between his teeth without the least hurt, or even             
tearing my clothes. But the poor gardener, who knew me well, and had a      
great kindness for me, was in a terrible fright. He gently took me          
up in both his hands, and asked me how I did; but I was so amazed           
and out of breath, that I could not speak a word. In a few minutes I        
came to myself, and he carried me safe to my little nurse, who by this      
time had returned to the place where she left me, and was in cruel          
agonies when I did not appear, nor answer when she called: she              
severely reprimanded the gardener on account of his dog. But the thing      
was hushed up, and never known at court; for the girl was afraid of         
the Queen's anger, and truly as to myself, I thought it would not be        
for my reputation that such a story should go about.                        
  This accident absolutely determined Glumdalclitch never to trust          
me abroad for the future out of her sight. I had been long afraid of        
this resolution, and therefore concealed from her some little               
unlucky adventures that happened in those times when I was left by          
myself. Once a kite hovering over the garden made a swoop at me, and        
if I had not resolutely drawn my hanger, and run under a thick              
espalier, he would have certainly carried me away in his talons.            
Another time walking to the top of a fresh molehill, I fell to my neck      
in the hole through which that animal had cast up the earth, and            
coined some lie, not worth remembering, to excuse myself for                
spoiling my clothes. I likewise broke my right shin against the             
shell of a snail, which I happened to stumble over, as I was walking        
alone, and thinking on poor England.                                        
  I cannot tell whether I were more pleased or mortified, to observe        
in those solitary walks that the smaller birds did not appear to be at      
all afraid of me, but would hop about within a yard's distance,             
looking for worms and other food with as much indifference and              
security as if no creature at all were near them. I remember a              
thrush had the confidence to snatch out of my hand with his bill a          
piece of cake that Glumdalclitch had just given me for my breakfast.        
When I attempted to catch any of these birds, they would boldly turn        
against me, endeavoring to pick my fingers, which I dared not               
venture within their reach; and then they would hop back unconcerned        
to hunt for worms or snails, as they did before. But one day I took         
a thick cudgel, and threw it with all my strength so luckily at a           
linnet that I knocked him down, and seizing him by the neck with            
both my hands, ran with him in triumph to my nurse. However, the bird,      
who had only been stunned, recovering himself, gave me so many boxes        
with his wings on both sides of my head and body, though I held him at      
arm's length, and was out of the reach of his claws, that I was twenty      
times thinking to let him go. But I was soon relieved by one of our         
servants, who wrung off the bird's neck, and I had him next day for         
dinner, by the Queen's command. This as near as I can remember, to          
be somewhat larger than an English swan.                                    
                                                     {P_2|CH_5 ^paragraph 5}
  The Maids of Honor often invited Glumdalclitch to their                   
apartments, and desired she would bring me along with her, on               
purpose to have the pleasure of seeing and touching me. They would          
often strip me naked from top to toe, and lay me at full length in          
their bosoms; wherewith I was much disgusted; because, to say the           
truth, a very offensive smell came from their skins; which I do not         
mention or intend to the disadvantage of those excellent ladies, for        
whom I have all manner of respect; but I conceive that my sense was         
more acute in proportion to my littleness, and that those                   
illustrious persons were no more disagreeable to their lovers, or to        
each other, than people of the same quality are with us in England.         
And, after all, I found their natural smell was much more                   
supportable than when they used perfumes, under which I immediately         
swooned away. I cannot forget that an intimate friend of mine in            
Lilliput took the freedom in a warm day, when I had used a good deal        
of exercise, to complain of a strong smell about me, although I am          
as little faulty that way as most of my sex: but I suppose his faculty      
of smelling was as nice with regard to me, as mine was to that of this      
people. Upon this point, I cannot forbear doing justice to the Queen        
my mistress, and Glumdalclitch my nurse, whose persons were as sweet        
as those of any lady in England.                                            
  That which gave me most uneasiness among these Maids of Honor,            
when my nurse carried me to visit them, was to see them use me without      
any manner of ceremony, like a creature who had no sort of                  
consequence. For they would strip themselves to the skin, and put on        
their smocks in my presence, while I was placed on their toilet             
directly before their naked bodies, which, I am sure, to me was very        
far from being a tempting sight, or from giving me any other                
emotions than those of horror and disgust. Their skins appeared so          
coarse and uneven, so variously colored, when I saw them near, with         
a mole here and there as broad as a trencher, and hairs hanging from        
it thicker than packthreads, to say nothing further concerning the          
rest of their persons. Neither did they at all scruple, while I was         
by, to discharge what they had drunk, to the quantity of at least           
two hogsheads, in a vessel that held above three tons. The                  
handsomest among these Maids of Honor, a pleasant frolicsome girl of        
sixteen, would sometimes set me astride upon one of her nipples,            
with many other tricks, wherein the reader will excuse me for not           
being over particular. But I was so much displeased, that I                 
entreated Glumdalclitch to contrive some excuse for not seeing that         
young lady any more.                                                        
  One day a young gentleman, who was a nephew to my nurse's governess,      
came and pressed them both to see an execution. It was of a man who         
had murdered one of that gentleman's intimate acquaintance.                 
Glumdalclitch was prevailed on to be of the company, very much against      
her inclination, for she was naturally tender-hearted; and as for           
myself, although I abhorred such kind of spectacles, yet my                 
curiosity tempted me to see something that I thought must be                
extraordinary. The malefactor was fixed in a chair upon a scaffold          
erected for the purpose, and his head cut off at a blow with a sword        
of about forty foot long. The veins and arteries spouted up such a          
prodigious quantity of blood, and so high in the air, that the great        
jet d'eau at Versailles was not equal for the time it lasted; and           
the head, when it fell on the scaffold floor, gave such a bounce, as        
made me start, although I were at least half an English mile distant.       
  The Queen, who often used to hear me talk of my sea voyages, and          
took all occasions to divert me when I was melancholy, asked me             
whether I understood how to handle a sail or an oar, and whether a          
little exercise of rowing might not be convenient for my health. I          
answered that I understood both very well. For, although my proper          
employment had been to be surgeon or doctor to the ship, yet upon a         
pinch, I was forced to work like a common mariner. But I could not see      
how this could be done in their country, where the smallest wherry was      
equal to a first-rate man of war among us, and such a boat as I             
could manage would never live in any of their rivers. Her Majesty           
said, if I would contrive a boat, her own joiner should make it, and        
she would provide a place for me to sail in. The fellow was an              
ingenious workman, and by my instructions in ten days finished a            
pleasure boat with all its tackling, able conveniently to hold eight        
Europeans. When it was finished, the Queen was so delighted, that           
she ran with it in her lap to the King, who ordered it to be put in         
a cistern full of water, with me in it, by way of trial; where I could      
not manage my two sculls, or little oars, for want of room. But the         
Queen had before contrived another project. She ordered the joiner          
to make a wooden trough of three hundred feet long, fifty broad, and        
eight deep; which being well pitched to prevent leaking, was placed on      
the floor along the wall, in an outer room of the palace. It had a          
cock near the bottom to let out the water when it began to grow stale,      
and two servants could easily fill it in half an hour. Here I often         
used to row for my own diversion, as well as that of the Queen and her      
ladies, who thought themselves well entertained with my skill and           
agility. Sometimes I would put up my sail, and then my business was         
only to steer, while the ladies gave me a gale with their fans; and         
when they were weary, some of the pages would blow my sail forward          
with their breath, while I showed my art steering starboard or              
larboard as I pleased. When I had done, Glumdalclitch always carried        
my boat into her closet, and hung it on a nail to dry.                      
  In this exercise I once met an accident which had like to have            
cost me my life. For one of the pages having put my boat into the           
trough, the governess who attended Glumdalclitch very officiously           
lifted me up to place me in the boat, but I happened to slip through        
her fingers, and should have infallibly fallen down forty feet upon         
the floor, if by the luckiest chance in the world, I had not been           
stopped by a corking-pin that stuck in the good gentlewoman's               
stomacher; the head of the pin passed between my shirt and the              
waistband of my breeches, and thus I was held by the middle in the air      
till Glumdalclitch ran to my relief.                                        
                                                    {P_2|CH_5 ^paragraph 10}
  Another time, one of the servants, whose office it was to fill my         
trough every third day with fresh water, was so careless to let a huge      
frog (not perceiving it) slip out of his pail. The frog lay                 
concealed till I was put into my boat, but then seeking a resting           
place, climbed up, and made it lean so much on one side, that I was         
forced to balance it with all my weight on the other, to prevent            
overturning. When the frog got in, it hopped at once half the length        
of the boat, and then over my head, backwards and forwards, daubing my      
face and clothes with its odious slime. The largeness of its                
features made it appear the most deformed animal that can be                
conceived. However, I desired Glumdaclitch to let me deal with it           
alone. I banged it a good while with one of my sculls, and at last          
forced it to leap out of the boat.                                          
  But the greatest danger I ever underwent in that kingdom was from         
a monkey, who belonged to one of the clerks of the kitchen.                 
Glumdalclitch had locked me up in her closet, while she went somewhere      
upon business or a visit. The weather being very warm, the closet           
window was left open, as well as the windows and the door of my bigger      
box, in which I usually lived, because of its largeness and                 
conveniency. As I sat quietly meditating at my table, I heard               
something bounce in at the closet window, and skip about from one side      
to the other; whereat, although I was much alarmed, yet I ventured          
to look out, but stirred not from my seat; and then I saw this              
frolicsome animal, frisking and leaping up and down, till at last he        
came to my box, which he seemed to view with great pleasure and             
curiosity, peeping in at the door and every window. I retreated to the      
farther corner of my room, or box, but the monkey looking in at             
every side, put me into such a fright, that I wanted presence of            
mind to conceal myself under the bed, as I might easily have done.          
After some time spent in peeping, grinning, and chattering, he at last      
espied me, and reaching one of his paws in at the door, as a cat            
does when she plays with a mouse, although I often shifted place to         
avoid him, he at length seized the lappet of my coat (which being made      
of that country cloth, was very thick and strong) and dragged me            
out. He took me up in his right forefoot, and held me as a nurse            
does a child she is going to suckle, just as I have seen the same sort      
of creature do with a kitten in Europe: and when I offered to               
struggle, he squeezed me so hard, that I thought it more prudent to         
submit. I have good to believe that he took me for a young one of           
his own species, by his often stroking my face very gently with his         
other paw. In these diversions he was interrupted by a noise at the         
closet door, as if somebody were opening it; whereupon he suddenly          
leaped up to the window at which he had come in, and thence upon the        
leads and gutters, walking upon three legs, and holding me in the           
fourth, till he clambered up to a roof that was next to ours. I             
heard Glumdalclitch give a shriek at the moment he was carrying me          
out. The poor girl was almost distracted: that quarter of the palace        
was all in an uproar; the servants ran for ladders; the monkey was          
seen by hundreds in the court, sitting upon the ridge of a building,        
holding me like a baby in one of his fore-paws, and feeding me with         
the other, by cramming into my mouth some victuals he had squeezed out      
of the bag on one side of his chaps, and patting me when I would not        
eat; whereat many of the rabble below could not forbear laughing;           
neither do I think they justly ought to be blamed, for without              
question the sight was ridiculous enough to everybody but myself. Some      
of the people threw up stones, hoping to drive the monkey down; but         
this was strictly forbidden, or else very probably my brains had            
been dashed out.                                                            
  The ladders were now applied, and mounted by several men, which           
the monkey observing, and finding himself almost encompassed, not           
being able to make speed enough with his three legs, let me drop on         
a ridge tile, and made his escape. Here I sat for some time three           
hundred yards from the ground, expecting every moment to be blown down      
by the wind, or to fall by my own giddiness, and come tumbling over         
and over from the ridge to the eaves; but an honest lad, one of my          
nurse's footmen, climbed up, and putting me into his breeches               
pocket, brought me down safe.                                               
  I was almost choked with the filthy stuff the monkey had crammed          
down my throat: but my dear little nurse picked it out of my mouth          
with a small needle, and then I fell to vomiting, which gave me             
great relief. Yet I was so weak and bruised in the sides with the           
squeezes given me by this odious animal, that I was forced to keep          
my bed a fortnight. The King, Queen, and all the court, sent every day      
to inquire after my health, and her Majesty made me several visits          
during my sickness. The monkey was killed, and an order made that no        
such animal should be kept about the palace.                                
  When I attended the King after my recovery, to return him thanks for      
his favors, he was pleased to rally me a good deal upon this                
adventure. He asked me what my thoughts and speculations were while         
I lay in the monkey's paw, how I liked the victuals he gave me, his         
manner of feeding, and whether the fresh air on the roof had sharpened      
my stomach. He desired to know what I would have done upon such an          
occasion my own country. I told his Majesty that in Europe we had no        
monkeys, except such as were brought for curiosities from other             
places, and so small that I could deal with a dozen of them                 
together, if they presumed to attack me. And as for that monstrous          
animal with whom I was so lately engaged (it was indeed as large as an      
elephant), if my fears had suffered me to think so far as to make           
use of my hanger (looking fiercely and clapping my hand upon the            
hilt as I spoke) when he poked his paw into my chamber, perhaps I           
should have given him such a wound, as would have made him glad to          
withdraw it with more haste than he put it in. This I delivered in a        
firm tone, like a person who was jealous lest his courage should be         
called in question. However, my speech produced nothing else besides a      
loud laughter, which all the respect due to his Majesty from those          
about him could not make them contain. This made me reflect how vain        
an attempt it is for a man to endeavor doing himself honor among those      
who are out of all degree of equality or comparison with him. And           
yet I have seen the moral of my own behavior very frequent in               
England since my return, where a little contemptible varlet, without        
the least title to birth, person, wit, or common sense, shall               
presume to look with importance, and put himself upon a foot with           
the greatest persons of the kingdom.                                        
                                                    {P_2|CH_5 ^paragraph 15}
  I was every day furnishing the court with some ridiculous story; and      
Glumdalclitch, although she loved me to excess, yet was arch enough to      
inform the Queen, whenever I committed any folly that she thought           
would be diverting to her Majesty. The girl, who had been out of            
order, was carried by her governess to take the air about an hour's         
distance, or thirty miles from town. They alighted out of the coach         
near a small footpath in a field, and Glumdalclitch setting down my         
traveling box, I went out of it to walk. There was a cow dung in the        
path, and I must needs try my activity by attempting to leap over           
it. I took a run, but unfortunately jumped short, and found myself          
just in the middle up to my knees. I waded through with some                
difficulty, and one of the footmen wiped me as clean as he could            
with his handkerchief; for I was filthily bemired, and my nurse             
confined me to my box till we returned home; where the Queen was            
soon informed of what had passed, and the footmen spread it about           
the court, so that all the mirth, for some days, was at my expense.         
                                                                            
P_2|CH_6                                                                    
  CHAPTER VI                                                                
-                                                                           
  I used to attend the King's levee once or twice a week, and had           
often seen him under the barber's hand, which indeed was at first very      
terrible to behold; for the razor was almost twice as long as an            
ordinary scythe. His Majesty, according to the custom of the                
country, was only shaved twice a week. I once prevailed on the              
barber to give me some of the suds or lather, out of which I picked         
forty or fifty of the strongest stumps of hair. I then took a piece of      
fine wood, and cut it like the back of a comb, making several holes in      
it at equal distance with as small a needle as I could get from             
Glumdalclitch. I fixed in the stumps so artificially, scraping and          
sloping them with my knife toward the points, that I made a very            
tolerable comb; which was a seasonable supply, my own being so much         
broken in the teeth, that it was almost useless: neither did I know         
any artist in that country so nice and exact, as would undertake to         
make me another.                                                            
  And this puts me in mind of an amusement wherein I spent many of          
my leisure hours. I desired the Queen's woman to save for me the            
combings of her Majesty's hair, whereof in time I got a good quantity,      
and consulting with my friend the cabinet-maker, who had received           
general orders to do little jobs for me, I directed him to make two         
chair frames, no larger than those I had in my box, and then to bore        
little holes with a fine awl round those parts where I designed the         
backs and seats; through these holes I wove the strongest hairs I           
could pick out, just after the manner of cane chairs in England.            
When they were finished, I made a present of them to her Majesty,           
who kept them in her cabinet, and used to show them for curiosities,        
as indeed they were the wonder of every one that beheld them. The           
Queen would have had me sit upon one of these chairs, but I absolutely      
refused to obey her, protesting I would rather die a thousand deaths        
than place a dishonorable part of my body on those precious hairs that      
once adorned her Majesty's head. Of these hairs (as I had always a          
mechanical genius) I likewise made a neat little purse about five feet      
long, with her Majesty's name deciphered in gold letters, which I gave      
to Glumdalclitch, by the Queen's consent. To say the truth, it was          
more for show than use, being not of strength to bear the weight of         
the larger coins, and therefore she kept nothing in it but some little      
toys that girls are fond of.                                                
  The King, who delighted in music, had frequent concerts at court, to      
which I was sometimes carried, and set in my box on a table to hear         
them; but the noise was so great, that I could hardly distinguish           
the tunes. I am confident that all the drums and trumpets of a royal        
army, beating and sounding together just at your ears, could not equal      
it. My practice was to have my box removed from the places where the        
performers sat, as far as I could, then to shut the doors and               
windows of it, and draw the window curtains; after which I found their      
music not disagreeable.                                                     
  I had learned in my youth to play a little upon the spinet                
Glumdaclitch kept one in her chamber, and a master attended twice a         
week to teach her: I call it a spinet, because it somewhat resembled        
that instrument. and was played upon in the same manner. A fancy            
came into my head that I would entertain the King and Queen with an         
English tune upon this instrument. But this appeared extremely              
difficult; for the spinet was near sixty feet long, each key being          
almost a foot wide, so that, with my arms extended, I could not             
reach to above five keys, and to press them down required a good smart      
stroke with my fist, which would be too great a labor, and to no            
purpose. The method I contrived was this. I prepared two round              
sticks about the bigness of common cudgels; they were thicker at one        
end than the other, and I covered the thicker ends with a piece of a        
mouse's skin, that by rapping on them I might neither damage the            
tops of the keys, nor interrupt the sound. Before the spinet a bench        
was placed, about four feet below the keys, and I was put upon the          
bench. I ran sideling upon it that way and this, as fast as I could,        
banging the proper keys with my two sticks, and made a shift to play a      
jig, to the great satisfaction of both their Majesties: but it was the      
most violent exercise I ever underwent, and yet I could not strike          
above sixteen keys, nor, consequently, play the bass and treble             
together, as other artists do; which was a great disadvantage to my         
performance.                                                                
  The King, who, as I before observed, was a prince of excellent            
understanding, would frequently order that I should be brought in my        
box, and set upon the table in his closet. He would then command me to      
bring one of my chairs out of the box, and sit down within three yards      
distance upon the top of the cabinet, which brought me almost to a          
level with his face. In this manner I had several conversations with        
him. I one day took the freedom to tell his Majesty, that the contempt      
he discovered towards Europe, and the rest of the world, did not            
seem answerable to those excellent qualities of the mind he was master      
of. That reason did not extend itself with the bulk of the body: on         
the contrary, we observed in our country that the tallest persons were      
usually least provided with it. That among other animals, bees and          
ants had the reputation of more industry, art and sagacity, than            
many of the larger kinds. And that, as inconsiderable as he took me to      
be, I hoped I might live to do his Majesty some signal service. The         
King heard me with attention, and began to conceive a much better           
opinion of me than he had ever before. He desired I would give him          
as exact an account of the government of England as I possibly              
could; because, as fond as princes commonly are of their own customs        
(for so he conjectured of other monarchs, by my former discourses), he      
should be glad to hear of anything that might deserve imitation.            
                                                     {P_2|CH_6 ^paragraph 5}
  Imagine with thyself, courteous reader, how often I then wished           
for the tongue of Demosthenes or Cicero, that might have enabled me to      
celebrate the praise of my own dear native country in a style equal to      
its merits and felicity.                                                    
  I began my discourse by informing his Majesty that our dominions          
consisted of two islands, which composed three mighty kingdoms under        
one sovereign, beside our plantations in America. I dwelt long upon         
the fertility of our soil, and the temperature of our climate. I            
then spoke at large upon the constitution of an English Parliament,         
partly made up of an illustrious body called the House of Peers,            
persons of the noblest blood, and of the most ancient and ample             
patrimonies. I described that extraordinary care always taken of their      
education in arts and arms, to qualify them for being counselors            
born to the king and kingdom, to have a share in the legislature, to        
be members of the highest Court of Judicature, from whence there could      
be no appeal, and to be champions always ready for the defense of           
their prince and country, by their valor, conduct, and fidelity.            
That these were the ornament and bulwark of the kingdom, worthy             
followers of their most renowned ancestors, whose honor had been the        
reward of their virtue, from which their posterity were never once          
known to degenerate. To these we joined several holy persons, as            
part of that assembly, under the title of Bishops, whose peculiar           
business it is to take care of religion, and of those who instruct the      
people therein. These were searched and sought out through the whole        
nation, by the prince and his wisest counselors, among such of the          
priesthood as were most deservedly distinguished by the sanctity of         
their lives, and the depth of their erudition; who were indeed the          
spiritual fathers of the clergy and the people.                             
  That the other part of the Parliament consisted of an assembly            
called the House of Commons, who were all principal gentlemen,              
freely picked and culled out by the people themselves, for their great      
abilities and love of their country, to represent the wisdom of the         
whole nation. And these two bodies make up the most august assembly in      
Europe, to whom, in conjunction with the prince, the whole legislature      
is committed.                                                               
  I then descended to the Courts of justice, over which the judges,         
those venerable sages and interpreters of the law, presided, for            
determining the disputed rights and properties of men, as well as           
for the punishment of vice, and protection of innocence. I mentioned        
the prudent management of our treasury; the valor and achievements          
of our forces by sea and land. I computed the number of our people, by      
reckoning how many millions there might be of each religious sect,          
or political party among us. I did not omit even our sports and             
pastimes, or any other particular which I thought might redound to the      
honor of my country. And I finished all with a brief historical             
account of affairs and events in England for about a hundred years          
past.                                                                       
  This conversation was not ended under five audiences, each of             
several hours, and the King heard the whole with great attention,           
frequently taking notes of what I spoke, as well as memorandums of          
several questions he intended to ask me.                                    
                                                    {P_2|CH_6 ^paragraph 10}
  When I had put an end to these long discourses, his Majesty in a          
sixth audience, consulting his notes, proposed many doubts, queries,        
and objections, upon every article. He asked what methods were used to      
cultivate the minds and bodies of our young nobility, and in what kind      
of business they commonly spent the first and teachable part of             
their lives. What course was taken to supply that assembly when any         
noble family became extinct. What qualifications were in those who          
were to be created new lords. Whether the humor of the prince, a sum        
of money to a court lady, or a prime minister, or a design of               
strengthening a party opposite to the public interest, ever happened        
to be motives in those advancements. What share of knowledge these          
lords had in the laws of their country, and how they came by it, so as      
to enable them to decide the properties of their fellow-subjects in         
the last resort. Whether they were always so free from avarice,             
partialities, or want, that a bribe, or some other sinister view,           
could have no place among them. Whether those holy lords I spoke of         
were always promoted to that rank upon account of their knowledge in        
religious matters, and the sanctity of their lives, had never been          
compliers with the times while they were common priests, or slavish         
prostitute chaplains to some nobleman, whose opinions they continued        
servilely to follow after they were admitted into that assembly.            
  He then desired to know what arts were practiced in electing those        
whom I commoners: whether a stranger with a strong purse might not          
influence the vulgar voters to choose him before their own landlord,        
or the most considerable gentleman in the neighborhood. How it came to      
pass, that people were so violently bent upon getting into this             
assembly, which I allowed to be a great trouble and expense, often          
to the ruin of their families, without any salary or pension:               
because this appeared such an exalted strain of virtue and public           
spirit, that his Majesty seemed to doubt it might possibly not be           
always sincere: and he desired to know whether such zealous                 
gentlemen could have any views of refunding themselves for the charges      
and trouble they were at, by sacrificing the public good to the             
designs of a weak and vicious prince in conjunction with a corrupted        
ministry. He multiplied his questions and sifted me thoroughly upon         
every part of this head, proposing numberless inquiries and                 
objections, which I think it not prudent or convenient to repeat.           
  Upon what I said in relation to our Courts of Justice, his Majesty        
desired to be satisfied in several points: and this I was the better        
able to do, having been formerly almost ruined by a long suit in            
chancery, which was decreed for me with costs. He asked, what time was      
usually spent in determining between right and wrong, and what              
degree of expense. Whether advocates and orators had liberty to             
plead in causes manifestly known to be unjust, vexatious, or                
oppressive. Whether party in religion or politics were observed to          
be of any weight in the scale of justice. Whether those pleading            
orators were persons educated in the general knowledge of equity, or        
only in provincial, national, and other local customs. Whether they or      
their judges had any part in penning those laws which they assumed the      
liberty of interpreting and glossing upon at their pleasure. Whether        
they had ever at different times pleaded for and against the same           
cause, and cited precedents to prove contrary opinions. Whether they        
were a rich or a poor corporation. Whether they received any pecuniary      
reward for pleading or delivering their opinions. And particularly          
whether they were ever admitted as members in the lower senate.             
  He fell next upon the management of our treasury; and said he             
thought my memory had failed me, because I computed our taxes at about      
five or six millions a year, and when I came to mention the issues, he      
found they sometimes amounted to more than double; for the notes he         
had taken were very particular in this point, because he hoped, as          
he told me, that the knowledge of our conduct might be useful to            
him, and he could not be deceived in his calculations. But, if what         
I told him were true, he was still at a loss how a kingdom could run        
out of its estate like a private person. He asked me, who were our          
creditors; and where we should find money to pay them. He wondered          
to hear me talk of such chargeable and extensive wars; that                 
certainly we must be a quarrelsome people, or live among very bad           
neighbors, and that our generals must needs be richer than our              
kings. He asked what business we had out of our own islands, unless         
upon the score of trade or treaty, or to defend the coasts with our         
fleet. About all, he was amazed to hear me talk of a mercenary              
standing army in the midst of peace, and among a free people. He said,      
if we were governed by our own consent in the persons of our                
representatives, he could not imagine of whom we were afraid, or            
against whom we were to fight; and would hear my opinion, whether a         
private man's house might not better be defended by himself, his            
children, and family, than by half a dozen rascals picked up at a           
venture in the streets, for small wages, who might get a hundred times      
more by cutting their throats.                                              
  He laughed at my odd kind of arithmetic (as he was pleased to call        
it) in reckoning the numbers of our people by a computation drawn from      
the several sects among us in religion and politics. He said, he            
knew no reason, why those who entertain opinions prejudicial to the         
public, should be obliged to change, or should not be obliged to            
conceal them. And as it was tyranny in any government to require the        
first, so it was weakness not to enforce the second: for a man may          
be allowed to keep poisons in his closet, but not to vend them about        
for cordials.                                                               
                                                    {P_2|CH_6 ^paragraph 15}
  He observed that among the diversions of our nobility and gentry I        
had mentioned gaming. He desired to know at what age this                   
entertainment was usually taken up, and when it was laid down; how          
much of their time it employed; whether it ever went so high as to          
affect their fortunes; whether mean vicious people, by their dexterity      
in that art, might not arrive at great riches, and sometimes keep           
our very nobles in dependence, as well as habituate them to vile            
companions, wholly take them from the improvement of their minds,           
and force them, by the losses they have received, to learn and              
practice that infamous dexterity upon others.                               
  He was perfectly astonished with the historical account I gave him        
of our affairs during the last century, protesting it was only a            
heap of conspiracies, rebellions, murders, massacres, revolutions,          
banishments, the very worst effects that avarice, faction,                  
hypocrisy, perfidiousness, cruelty, rage, madness, hatred, envy, lust,      
malice, or ambition could produce.                                          
  His Majesty in another audience was at the pains to recapitulate the      
sum of all I had spoken, compared the questions he made with the            
answers I had given, then taking me into his hands, and stroking me         
gently, delivered himself in these words, which I shall never forget        
nor the manner he spoke them in: My little friend Grildrig, you have        
made a most admirable panegyric upon your country; you have clearly         
proved that ignorance, idleness, and vice, may be sometimes the only        
ingredients for qualifying a legislator; that laws are best explained,      
interpreted, and applied by those whose interest and abilities lie          
in perverting, confounding, and eluding them. I observe among you some      
lines of an institution, which in its original might have been              
tolerable, but these half erased, and the rest wholly blurred and           
blotted by corruptions. It does not appear from all you have said, how      
any one virtue is required towards the procurement of any one               
station among you; much less that men are ennobled on account of their      
virtue, that priests are advanced for their piety or learning,              
soldiers for their conduct or valor, judges for their integrity,            
senators for the love of their country, or counsellors for their            
wisdom. As for yourself (continued the King) who have spent the             
greatest part of your life in traveling, I am well disposed to hope         
you may hitherto have escaped many vices of your country. But by            
what I have gathered from your own relation, and the answers I have         
with much pains wringed and extorted from you, I cannot but conclude        
the bulk of your natives to be the most pernicious race of little           
odious vermin that nature ever suffered to crawl upon the surface of        
the earth.                                                                  
                                                                            
P_2|CH_7                                                                    
  CHAPTER VII                                                               
-                                                                           
  Nothing but an extreme love of truth could have hindered me from          
concealing this part of my story. It was in vain to discover my             
resentments, which were always turned into ridicule; and I was              
forced to rest with patience while my noble and most beloved country        
was so injuriously treated. I am heartily sorry as any of my readers        
can possibly be, that such an occasion was given: but this prince           
happened to be so curious and inquisitive upon every particular,            
that it could not consist either with gratitude or good manners to          
refuse giving him what satisfaction I was able. Yet thus much I may be      
allowed to say in my own vindication, that I artfully eluded many of        
his questions, and gave to every point a more favorable turn by many        
degrees than the strictness of truth would allow. For I have always         
borne that laudable partiality to my own country, which Dionysius           
Halicarnassensis with so much justice recommends to a historian. I          
would hide the frailties and deformities of my political mother, and        
place her virtues and beauties in the most advantageous light. This         
was my sincere endeavor in those many discourses I had with that            
mighty monarch, although it unfortunately failed of success.                
  But great allowances should be given to a King who lives wholly           
secluded from the rest of the world, and must therefore be                  
altogether unacquainted with the manners and customs that most prevail      
in other nations; the want of which knowledge will ever produce many        
prejudices, and a certain narrowness of thinking, from which we and         
the politer countries of Europe are wholly exempted. And it would be        
hard indeed, if so remote a prince's notions of virtue and vice were        
to be offered as a standard for all mankind.                                
  To confirm what I have now said, and further, to show the                 
miserable effects of a confined education, I shall here insert a            
passage which will hardly obtain belief. In hopes to ingratiate myself      
farther into his Majesty's favor, I told him of an invention                
discovered between three and four hundred years ago, to make a certain      
powder, into a heap of which the smallest spark of fire falling, would      
kindle the whole in a moment, although it were as big as a mountain,        
and make it all fly up in the air together, with a noise and agitation      
greater than thunder. That a proper quantity of this powder rammed          
into a hollow tube of brass or iron, according to its bigness, would        
drive a ball of iron or lead with such violence and speed, as               
nothing was able to sustain its force. the largest balls thus               
discharged, would not only destroy whole ranks of an army at once, but      
batter the strongest walls to the ground, sink down ships, with a           
thousand men in each, to the bottom of the sea; and, when linked            
together by a chain, would cut through masts and rigging, divide            
hundreds of bodies in the middle, and lay all waste before them.            
That we often put this powder into large hollow balls of iron, and          
discharged them by an engine into some city we were besieging, which        
would rip up the pavements, tear the houses to pieces, burst and throw      
splinters on every side, dashing out the brains of all who came             
near. That I knew the ingredients very well, which were cheap, and          
common; I understood the manner of compounding them, and could              
direct his workmen how to make those tubes of a size proportionable to      
all other things in his Majesty's kingdom, and the largest need not be      
above a hundred feet long; twenty or thirty of which tubes, charged         
with the proper quantity of powder and balls, would batter down the         
walls of the strongest town in his dominions in a few hours, or             
destroy the whole metropolis, if ever it should pretend to dispute his      
absolute commands. This I humbly offered to his Majesty, as a small         
tribute of acknowledgment in return of so many marks that I had             
received of his royal favor and protection.                                 
  The King was struck with horror at the description I had given of         
those terrible engines, and the proposal I had made. He was amazed how      
so impotent and grovelling an insect as I (these were his expressions)      
could entertain such inhuman ideas, and in so familiar a manner as          
to appear wholly unmoved at all the scenes of blood and desolation,         
which I had painted as the common effects of those destructive              
machines, whereof he said some evil genius, enemy to mankind, must          
have been the first contriver. As for himself, he protested that            
although few things delighted him so much as new discoveries in art or      
in nature, yet he would rather lose half his kingdom than be privy          
to such a secret, which he commanded me, as I valued my life, never to      
mention any more.                                                           
  A strange effect of narrow principles and short views that a              
prince possessed of every quality which procures veneration, love, and      
esteem; of strong parts, great wisdom, and profound learning, endued        
with admirable talents for government, and almost adored by his             
subjects, should from a nice unnecessary scruple, whereof in Europe we      
can have no conception, let slip an opportunity to put into his hands,      
that would have made him absolute master of the lives, the                  
liberties, and the fortunes of his people. Neither do I say this            
with the least intention to detract from the many virtues of that           
excellent King, whose character I am sensible will on this account          
be very much lessened in the opinion of an English reader: but I            
take this defect among them to have risen from their ignorance, they        
not having hitherto reduced politics into a science, as the more acute      
wits of Europe have done. For I remember very well, in a discourse one      
day with the King, when I happened to say there were several                
thousand books among us written upon the art of government, it gave         
him (directly contrary to my intention) a very mean opinion of our          
understandings. He professed both to abominate and despise all              
mystery, refinement, and intrigue, either in a prince or a minister.        
He could not tell what I meant secrets of state, where an enemy or          
some rival nation were not in the case. He confined the knowledge of        
governing within very narrow bounds; to common sense and reason, to         
justice and lenity, to the speedy determination of civil and                
criminal causes; with some other obvious topics, which are not worth        
considering. And he gave it for his opinion, that whoever could make        
two ears of corn or two blades of grass to grow upon a spot of              
ground where only one grew before, would deserve better of mankind,         
and do more essential service to his country than the whole race of         
politicians put together.                                                   
                                                     {P_2|CH_7 ^paragraph 5}
  The learning of this people is very defective, consisting only in         
morality, history, poetry, and mathematics, wherein they must be            
allowed to excel. But the last of these is wholly applied to what           
may be useful in life, to the improvement of agriculture, and all           
mechanical arts; so that among us it would be little esteemed. And          
as to ideas, entities, abstractions, and transcendentals, I could           
never drive the least conception into their heads.                          
  No law of that country must exceed in words the number of letters in      
their alphabet, which consists only of twenty-two. But indeed few of        
them extend even to that length. They are expressed in the most             
plain and simple terms, wherein those people are not mercurial              
enough to discover above one interpretation; and to write a comment         
upon any law is a capital crime. As to the decision of civil causes,        
or proceedings against criminals, their precedents are so few, that         
they have little reason to boast of any extraordinary skill in either.      
  They have had the art of printing, as well as the Chinese, time           
out of mind. But their libraries are not very large; for that of the        
King's which is reckoned the biggest, does not amount to above a            
thousand volumes, placed in a gallery twelve hundred feet long, from        
which I had liberty to borrow what books I pleased. The Queen's joiner      
had contrived in one of Glumdalclitch's rooms a kind of wooden machine      
twenty-five feet high, formed like a standing ladder; the steps were        
each fifty feet long. It was indeed a moveable pair of stairs, the          
lowest end placed at ten feet distance from the wall of the chamber.        
The book I had a mind to read was put up leaning against the wall. I        
first mounted to the upper step of the ladder, and turning my face          
towards the book, began at the top of the page, and so walking to           
the right and left about eight or ten yards, according to the length        
of the lines, till I had gotten a little below the level of my eyes,        
and then descending gradually till I came to the bottom; after which I      
mounted again and began the other page in the same manner, and so           
turned over the leaf, which I could easily do with both my hands,           
for it was as thick and stiff as pasteboard, and in the largest folios      
not above eighteen or twenty feet long.                                     
  Their style is clear, masculine, and smooth, but not florid, for          
they avoid nothing more than multiplying unnecessary words, or using        
various expressions. I have perused many of their books, especially         
those in history and morality. Among the rest, I was much diverted          
with a little old treatise, which always lay in Glumdalclitch's bed         
chamber, and belonged to her governess, a grave elderly gentlewoman,        
who dealt in writings of morality and devotion. The book treats of the      
weakness of human kind, and is in little esteem, except among the           
women and the vulgar. However, I was curious to see what an author          
of that country could say upon such a subject. This writer went             
through all the usual topics of European showing how diminutive,            
contemptible, and helpless an animal was man in his own nature; how         
unable to defend himself from the inclemencies of the air, or the fury      
of wild beasts; how much he was excelled by one creature in                 
strength, by another in speed, by a third in foresight, by a fourth in      
industry. He added, that nature was degenerated in these latter             
declining ages of the world, and could now produce only small abortive      
births in comparison of those in ancient times. He said, it was very        
reasonable to think, not only that the species of men were                  
originally much larger, but also, that there must have been giants          
in former ages, which, as it is asserted by history and tradition,          
so it has been confirmed by huge bones and skulls casually dug up in        
several parts of the Kingdom, far exceeding the common dwindled race        
of man in our days. He argued, that the very laws of nature absolutely      
required we should have been made in the beginning, of a size more          
large and robust, not so liable to destruction from every little            
accident of a tile falling from a house, or a stone cast from the hand      
of a boy, or of being drowned in a little brook. From this way of           
reasoning the author drew several moral applications useful in the          
conduct of life, but needless here to repeat. For my own part, I could      
not avoid reflecting how universally this talent was spread, of             
drawing lectures in morality, or indeed rather matter of discontent         
and repining, from the quarrels we raise with nature. And I believe,        
upon a strict inquiry, those quarrels might be shown as ill-grounded        
among us as they are among that people.                                     
  As to their military affairs, they boast that the King's army             
consists of a hundred and seventy-six thousand foot, and thirty-two         
thousand horse: if that may be called an army which is made up of           
tradesmen in the several cities, and farmers in the country, whose          
commanders are only the nobility and gentry, without pay or reward.         
They are indeed perfect enough in their exercises, and under very good      
discipline, wherein I saw no great merit; for how should it be              
otherwise, where every farmer is under the command of his own               
landlord, and every citizen under that of the principal men in his own      
city, chosen after the manner of Venice by ballot?                          
                                                    {P_2|CH_7 ^paragraph 10}
  I have often seen the militia of Lorbrulgrud drawn out to exercise        
in a great field near the city of twenty miles square. They were in         
all not above twenty-five thousand foot, and six thousand horse; but        
it was impossible for me to compute their number, considering the           
space of ground they took up. A cavalier mounted on a large steed,          
might be about a hundred feet high. I have seen this whole body of          
horse, upon a word of command, draw their swords at once, and brandish      
them in the air. Imagination can figure nothing so grand, so                
surprising, and so astonishing. It looked as if ten thousand flashes        
of lightning were darting at the same time from every quarter of the        
sky.                                                                        
  I was curious to know how this prince, to whose dominions there is        
no access from any other country, came to think of armies, or to teach      
his people the practice of military discipline. But I was soon              
informed, both by conversation and reading their histories. For in the      
course of many ages they have been troubled with the same disease to        
which the whole race of mankind is subject; the nobility often              
contending for power, the people for liberty, and the King for              
absolute dominion. All which, however happily tempered by the laws          
of the kingdom, have been sometimes violated by each of the three           
parties, and have once or more occasioned civil wars, the last whereof      
was happily put an end to by this prince's grandfather by a general         
composition; and the militia, then settled with common consent, has         
been ever since kept in the strictest duty.                                 
                                                                            
P_2|CH_8                                                                    
  CHAPTER VIII                                                              
-                                                                           
  I had always a strong impulse that I should some time recover my          
liberty, though it was impossible to conjecture by what means, or to        
form any project with the least hope of succeeding. The ship in             
which I sailed was the first ever known to be driven within sight of        
that coast, and the King had given strict orders, that if at any            
time another appeared, it should be taken ashore, and with all its          
crew and passengers brought in a tumbril to Lorbrulgrud. He was             
strongly bent to get me a woman of my own size, by whom I might             
propagate the breed: but I think I should rather have died than             
undergone the disgrace of leaving a posterity to be kept in cages like      
tame canary birds, and perhaps, in time, sold about the kingdom to          
persons of quality for curiosities. I was, indeed, treated with much        
kindness; I was the favorite of a great King and Queen, and the             
delight of the whole court, but it was upon such a foot as ill              
became the dignity of human kind. I could never forget those                
domestic pledges I had left behind me. I wanted to be among people          
with whom I could converse upon even terms, and walk about the streets      
and fields without fear of being trod to death like a frog or a             
young puppy. But my deliverance came sooner than I expected, and in         
a manner not very common; the whole story and circumstances of which I      
shall faithfully relate.                                                    
  I had now been two years in this country; and about the beginning of      
the third, Glumdalclitch and I attended the King and Queen in a             
progress to the coast of the kingdom. I was carried, as usual, in my        
traveling box, which, as I have already described, was a very               
convenient closet of twelve feet wide. And I had ordered a hammock          
to be fixed by silken ropes from the four corners at the top, to break      
the jolts, when a servant carried me before him on horseback, as I          
sometimes desired, and would often sleep in my hammock while we were        
upon the road. On the roof of my closet, just over the middle of the        
hammock, I ordered the joiner to cut out a hole a foot square, to give      
me air in hot weather as I slept, which hole I shut at pleasure with a      
board that drew backwards and forwards through a groove.                    
  When we came to our journey's end, the King thought proper to pass a      
few days at a palace he has near Flanflasnic, a city within eighteen        
English miles of the seaside. Glumdalclitch and I were much                 
fatigued; I had gotten a small cold, but the poor girl was so ill as        
to be confined to her chamber. I longed to see the ocean, which must        
be the only scene of my escape, if ever it should happen. I                 
pretended to be worse than I really was, and desired leave to take the      
fresh air of the sea, with a page whom I was very fond of, and who had      
sometimes been trusted with me. I shall never forget with what              
unwillingness Glumdalclitch consented, nor the strict charge she            
gave the page to be careful of me, bursting at the same time into a         
flood of tears, as if she had some foreboding of what was to happen.        
The boy took me out in my box about half an hour's walk from the            
palace, towards the rocks on the seashore. I ordered him to set me          
down, and lifting up one of my sashes, cast many a wistful                  
melancholy look towards the sea. I found myself not very well, and          
told the page that I had a mind to take a nap in my hammock, which I        
hoped would do me good. I got in, and the boy shut the window close         
down to keep out the cold. I soon fell asleep, and all I can                
conjecture is, that while I slept, the page, thinking no danger             
could happen, went among the rocks to look for birds' eggs, having          
before observed him from my window searching about, and picking up one      
or two in the clefts. Be that as it will, I found myself suddenly           
awaked with a violent pull upon the ring which was fastened at the top      
of my box for the conveniency of carriage. I felt my box raised very        
high in the air, and then borne forward with prodigious speed. The          
first jolt had like to have shaken me out of my hammock, but                
afterwards the motion was easy enough. I called out several times as        
loud as I could raise my voice, but all to no purpose. I looked             
towards my windows and could see nothing but the clouds and sky. I          
heard a noise just over my head like the clapping of wings, and then        
began to perceive the woeful condition I was in; that some eagle had        
got the ring of my box in his beak, with an intent to let it fall on a      
rock like a tortoise in a shell, and then pick out my body, and devour      
it. For the sagacity and smell of this bird enable him to discover his      
quarry at a great distance, though better concealed than I could be         
within a two-inch board.                                                    
  In a little time I observed the noise of flutter of wings to              
increase very fast, and my box was tossed up and down, like a sign          
post on a windy day. I heard several bangs or buffets, as I thought,        
given to the eagle (for such I am certain it must have been that            
held the ring of my box in his beak), and then all of a sudden felt         
myself falling perpendicularly down for above a minute, but with            
such incredible swiftness that I almost lost my breath. My fall was         
stopped by a terrible squash, that sounded louder to my ears than           
the cataract of Niagara; after which I was quite in the dark for            
another minute, and then my box began to rise so high that I could see      
light from the tops of my windows. I now perceived that I had fallen        
into the sea. My box, by the weight of my body, the goods that were         
in, and the broad plates of iron fixed for strength at the four             
corners of the top and bottom, floated five feet deep in water. I           
did then, and do now, suppose that the eagle which flew away with my        
box was pursued by two or three others, and forced to let me drop           
while he was defending himself against the rest, who hoped to share in      
the prey. The plates of iron fastened at the bottom of the box (for         
those were the strongest) preserved the balance while it fell, and          
hindered it from being broken on the surface of the water. Every joint      
of it was well grooved, and the door did not move on hinges, but up         
and down like a sash, which kept my closet so tight that very little        
water came in. I got with much difficulty out of my hammock, having         
first ventured to draw back the slipboard on the roof already               
mentioned, contrived on purpose to let in air, for want of which I          
found myself almost stifled.                                                
  How often did I then wish myself with my dear Glumdalclitch, from         
whom one single hour had so far divided me! And I may say with              
truth, that in the midst of my own misfortunes I could not forbear          
lamenting my poor nurse, the grief she would suffer for my loss, the        
displeasure of the Queen, and the ruin of her fortune. Perhaps many         
travelers have not been under greater difficulties and distress than I      
was at this juncture, expecting every moment to see my box dashed in        
pieces, or at least overset by the first violent blast, or a rising         
wave. A breach in one single pane of glass would have been immediate        
death: nor could anything have preserved the windows, but the strong        
lattice wires placed on the outside against accidents in traveling.         
I saw the water ooze in at several crannies, although the leaks were        
not considerable, and I endeavored to stop them as well as I could.         
I was not able to lift up the roof of my closet, which otherwise I          
certainly should have done, and sat on the top of it, where I might at      
least preserve myself some hours longer than by being shut up, as I         
may call it, in the hold. Or, if I escaped these dangers for a day          
or two, what could I expect but a miserable death of cold and               
hunger! I was four hours under these circumstances, expecting and           
indeed wishing every moment to be my last.                                  
                                                     {P_2|CH_8 ^paragraph 5}
  I have already told the reader that there were two strong staples         
fixed upon that side of my box which had no window, and into which the      
servant who used to carry me on horseback would put a leathern belt,        
and buckle it about his waist. Being in this disconsolate state, I          
heard or at least thought I beard some kind of grating noise on that        
side of my box where the staples were fixed, and soon after I began to      
fancy that the box was pulled or towed along in the sea; for I now and      
then felt a sort of tugging, which made the waves rise near the tops        
of my windows, leaving me almost in the dark. This gave me some             
faint hopes of relief, although I was not able to imagine how it could      
be brought about. I ventured to unscrew one of my chairs, which were        
always fastened to the floor; and having made a hard shift to screw it      
down again directly under the slipping-board that I had lately opened,      
I mounted on the chair, and putting my mouth as near as I could to the      
hole, I called for help in a loud voice, and in all the languages I         
understood. I then fastened my handkerchief to a stick I usually            
carried, and thrusting it up the hole, waved it several times in the        
air, that if any boat or ship were near, the seamen might conjecture        
some unhappy mortal to be shut up in the box.                               
  I found no effect from all I could do, but plainly perceived my           
closet to be moved along; and in the space of an hour, or better, that      
side of the box where the staples were, and had no window, struck           
against something that was hard. I apprehended it to be a rock, and         
found myself tossed more than ever. I plainly heard a noise upon the        
cover of my closet, like that of a cable, and the grating of it as          
it passed through the ring. I then found myself hoisted up by               
degrees at least three feet higher than I was before. Whereupon I           
again thrust up my stick and handkerchief, calling for help till I was      
almost hoarse. In return to which, I heard a great shout repeated           
three times, giving me such transports of joy, as are not to be             
conceived but by those who feel them. I now heard a trampling over          
my head, and somebody calling through the hole with a loud voice in         
the English tongue: If there be anybody below, let them speak. I            
answered, I was an Englishman, drawn by ill fortune into the                
greatest calamity that ever any creature underwent, and begged, by all      
that is moving, to be delivered out of the dungeon I was in. The voice      
replied, I was safe, for my box was fastened to their ship; and the         
carpenter should immediately come and saw an hole in the cover,             
large enough to pull me out. I answered, that was needless, and             
would take up too much time, for there was no more to be done, but let      
one of the crew put his finger into the ring, and take the box out          
of the sea into the ship, and so into the captain's cabin. Some of          
them upon hearing me talk so wildly thought I was mad; others laughed;      
for indeed it never came into my head that I was now among people of        
my own stature and strength. The carpenter came, and in a few               
minutes sawed a passage about four feet square, then let down a             
small ladder, upon which I mounted, and from thence was taken into the      
ship in a very weak condition.                                              
  The sailors were all in amazement, and asked me a thousand                
questions, which I had no inclination to answer. I was equally              
confounded at the sight of so many pigmies, for such I took them to         
be, after having so long accustomed my eyes to the monstrous objects I      
had left. But the Captain, Mr. Thomas Wilcocks, an honest worthy            
Shropshire man, observing I was ready to faint, took me into his            
cabin, gave me a cordial to comfort me, and made me turn in upon his        
own bed, advising me to take a little rest, of which I had great need.      
Before I went to sleep I gave him to understand that I had some             
valuable furniture in my box, too good to be lost, a fine hammock, a        
handsome field bed, two chairs, a table, and a cabinet; that my closet      
was hung on all sides, or rather quilted, with silk and cotton; that        
if he would let one of the crew bring my closet into his cabin, I           
would open it there before him, and show him my goods. The Captain          
hearing me utter these absurdities, concluded I was raving: however (I      
suppose to pacify me), he promised to give order as I desired, and          
going upon deck sent some of his men down into my closet, from              
whence (as I afterwards found) they drew up all my goods, and stripped      
off the quilting; but the chairs, cabinet, and bedstead, being screwed      
to the floor, were much damaged by the ignorance of the seamen, who         
tore them up by force. Then they knocked off some of the boards for         
the use of the ship, and when they had got all they had a mind for,         
let the hull drop into the sea, which by reason of many breaches            
made in the bottom and sides, sunk to rights. And indeed I was glad         
not to have been a spectator of the havoc they made; because I am           
confident it would have sensibly touched me, by bringing former             
passages into my mind, which I had rather forget.                           
  I slept some hours, but perpetually disturbed with dreams of the          
place I had left, and the dangers I had escaped. However, upon              
waking I found myself much recovered. It was now about eight o'clock        
at night, and the Captain ordered supper immediately, thinking I had        
already fasted too long. He entertained me with great kindness,             
observing me not to look wildly, or talk inconsistently: and when we        
were left alone, desired I would give him a relation of my travels,         
and by what accident I came to be set adrift in that monstrous              
wooden chest. He said, that about twelve o'clock at noon, as he was         
looking through his glass, he spied it at a distance, and thought it        
was a sail, which he had a mind to make, being not much out of his          
course, in hopes of buying some biscuit, his own beginning to fall          
short. That upon coming nearer, and finding his error, he sent out his      
longboat to discover what I was; that his men came back in a fright,        
swearing they had seen a swimming house. That he laughed at their           
folly, and went himself in the boat, ordering his men to take a strong      
cable along with them. That the weather being calm, he rowed round          
me several times, observed my windows, and the wire lattices that           
defended them. That he discovered two staples upon one side, which was      
all of boards, without any passage for light. He then commanded his         
men to row up to that side, and fastening a cable to one of the             
staples, ordered them to tow my chest (as he called it) towards the         
ship. When it was there, he gave directions to fasten another cable to      
the ring fixed in the cover, and to raise up my chest with pulley,          
which all the sailors were not able to do above two or three feet.          
He said they saw my stick and handkerchief thrust out of the hole, and      
concluded that some unhappy men must be shut up in the cavity. I asked      
whether he or the crew had seen any prodigious birds in the air             
about the time he first discovered me. To which he answered, that           
discoursing this matter with the sailors while I was asleep, one of         
them said he had observed three eagles flying towards the north, but        
remarked nothing of their being larger than the usual size, which I         
suppose must be imputed to the great height they were at; and he could      
not guess the reason of my question. I then asked the Captain how           
far he reckoned we might be from land; he said, by the best                 
computation he could make, we were at least a hundred leagues. I            
assured him, that he must be mistaken by almost half, for I had not         
left the country from where I came above two hours before I dropped         
into the sea. Whereupon he began again to think that my brain was           
disturbed, of which he gave me a hint, and advised me to go to bed          
in a cabin he had provided. I assured him I was well refreshed with         
his good entertainment and company, and as much in my senses as ever I      
was in my life. He then grew serious, and desired to ask me freely          
whether I were not troubled in mind by the consciousness of some            
enormous crime, for which I was punished at the command of some             
prince, by exposing me in that chest, as great criminals in other           
countries have been forced to sea in a leaky vessel without                 
provisions; for although he should be sorry to have taken so ill a man      
into his ship, yet he would engage his word to set me safe on shore in      
the first port where we arrived. He added, that his suspicions were         
much increased by some very absurd speeches I had delivered at first        
to the sailors, and afterwards to himself, in relation to my closet or      
chest, as well as by my odd looks and behavior while I was at supper.       
  I begged his patience to hear me tell my story, which I faithfully        
did from the last time I left England to the moment he first                
discovered me. And as truth always forces its way into rational minds,      
so this honest worthy gentleman, who had some tincture of learning,         
and very good sense, was immediately convinced of my candor and             
veracity. But further to confirm all I had said, I entreated him to         
give order that my cabinet should be brought, of which I had the key        
in my pocket (for he had already informed me how the seamen disposed        
of my closet), I opened it in his presence and showed him the small         
collection of rarities I made in the country from where I had been          
so strangely delivered. There was a comb I had contrived out of the         
stumps of the King's beard, and another of the same materials, but          
fixed into a paring of her Majesty's thumb-nail, which served for           
the back. There was a collection of needles and pins from a foot to         
half a yard long; four wasp-stings, like joiners' tacks; some combings      
of the Queen's hair; a gold ring which one day she made me a present        
of in a most obliging manner, taking it from her little finger, and         
throwing it over my head like a collar. I desired the Captain would         
please to accept this ring in return of his civilities, which he            
absolutely refused. I showed him a corn that I had cut off with my own      
hand, from a maid of honor's toe; it was about the bigness of a             
Kentish pippin, and grown so hard that when I returned to England, I        
got it hollowed into a cup, and set in silver. Lastly, I desired him        
to see the breeches I had then on, which were made of a mouse's skin.       
                                                    {P_2|CH_8 ^paragraph 10}
  I could force nothing on him but a footman's tooth, which I observed      
him to examine with great curiosity, and found he had a fancy for           
it. He received it with abundance of thanks, more than such a trifle        
could deserve. It was drawn by an unskillful surgeon, in a mistake,         
from one of Glumdalclitch's men, who was afflicted with the toothache,      
but it was as sound as any in his head. I got it cleaned, and put it        
into my cabinet. It was about a foot long, and four inches in               
diameter.                                                                   
  The Captain was very well satisfied with plain relation I had             
given him, and said he hoped when we returned to England I would            
oblige the world by putting it in paper and making it public. My            
answer was that I thought we were already overstocked with books of         
travels; that nothing could now pass which was not extraordinary;           
wherein I doubted some authors less consulted truth than their own          
vanity, or interest, or the diversion of ignorant readers. That my          
story could contain little besides common events, without those             
ornamental descriptions of strange plants, trees, birds, and other          
animals, or of the barbarous customs and idolatry of savage people,         
with which most writers abound. However, I thanked him for his good         
opinion, and promised to take the matter into my thoughts.                  
  He said he wondered at one thing very much, which was, to bear me         
speak so loud, asking me whether the King or Queen of that country          
were thick of hearing. I told him it was what I had been used to for        
above two years past, and that I admired as much at the voices of           
him and his men, who seemed to me only to whisper, and yet I could          
hear them well enough. But when I spoke in that country, it was like a      
man talking in the street to another looking out from the top of a          
steeple, unless when I was placed on a table, or held in any                
person's hand, I told him, I had likewise observed another thing, that      
when I first got into the ship, and the sailors stood all about me,         
I thought they were the most little contemptible creatures I had            
ever beheld. For indeed while I was in that prince's country, I             
could never endure to look in a glass after my eyes had been                
accustomed to such prodigious objects, because the comparison gave          
me so despicable a conceit of myself. The Captain said that while we        
were at supper he observed me look at everything with a sort of             
wonder, and that I often seemed hardly able to contain my laughter,         
which he knew not well how to take, but imputed it to some disorder in      
my brain. I answered, it was very true; and I wondered how I could          
forbear, when I saw his dishes of the size of a silver three-pence,         
a leg of pork hardly a mouthful, a cup not so big as a nut-shell;           
and so I went on, describing the rest of his household stuff and            
provisions after the same manner. For, although the Queen had               
ordered a little equipage of all things necessary for me while I was        
in her service, yet my ideas were wholly taken up with what I saw on        
every side of me, and I winked at my own littleness as people do at         
their own faults. The Captain understood my raillery very well, and         
merrily replied with the old English proverb, that he doubted my            
eyes were bigger than my belly, for he did not observe my stomach so        
good, although I had fasted all day; and continuing in his mirth,           
protested he would have gladly given a hundred pounds to have seen          
my closet in the eagle's bill, and afterwards in its fall from so           
great a height into the sea; which would certainly have been a most         
astonishing object, worthy to have the description of it transmitted        
to future ages: and the comparison of Phaeton was so obvious, that          
he could not forbear applying it, although I did not much admire the        
conceit.                                                                    
  The Captain having been at Tonquin, was in his return to England          
driven northeastward to the latitude of 44 degrees, and of longitude        
143. But meeting a trade wind two days after I came on board him, we        
sailed southward a long time, and coasting New Holland kept our course      
west-southwest, and then south-southwest till we doubled the Cape of        
Good Hope. Our voyage was very prosperous, but I shall not trouble the      
reader with a journal of it. The Captain called in at one or two            
ports, and sent in his long-boat for provisions and fresh water, but I      
never went out of the ship till we came into the Downs, which was on        
the third day of June, 1706, about nine months after my escape. I           
offered to leave my goods in security for payment of my freight; but        
the Captain protested he would not receive one farthing. We took            
kind leave of each other, and I made him promise he would come to           
see me at my house in Redriff. I hired a horse and guide for five           
shillings, which I borrowed of the Captain.                                 
  As I was on the road, observing the littleness of the houses, the         
trees, the cattle, and the people, I began to think myself in               
Lilliput. I was afraid of trampling on every traveler I met, and often      
called aloud to have them stand out of the way, so that I had like          
to have gotten one or two broken heads for my impertinence.                 
                                                    {P_2|CH_8 ^paragraph 15}
  When I came to my own house, for which I was forced to enquire,           
one of the servants opening the door, I bent down to go in (like a          
goose under a gate) for fear of striking my head. My wife ran out to        
embrace me, but I stooped lower than her knees, thinking she could          
otherwise never be able to reach my mouth. My daughter kneeled to           
ask my blessing, but I could not see her till she arose, having been        
so long used to stand with my head and eyes erect to above sixty feet;      
and then I went to take her up with one hand, by the waist. I looked        
down upon the servants and one or two friends who were in the house,        
as if they had been pigmies, and I a giant. I told my wife, she had         
been too thrifty, for I found she had starved herself and her daughter      
to nothing. In short, I behaved myself so unaccountably, that they          
were all of the Captain's opinion when he first saw me, and                 
concluded I had lost my wits. This I mention as an instance of the          
great power of habit and prejudice.                                         
  In a little time I and my family and friends came to a right              
understanding: but my wife protested I should never go to sea any           
more; although my evil destiny so ordered that she had not power to         
hinder me, as the reader may know hereafter. In the mean time I here        
conclude the second part of my unfortunate voyages.                         
-                                                                           
                THE END OF THE SECOND PART                                  
                                                                            
                                                                            
                                                                            
                                                                            
                                                                            
                                                                            
                                                                            
                                    PART III                                
                                                                            
        A VOYAGE TO LAPUTA, BALNIBARBI, GLUBBDUBDRIB, LUGGNAGG AND JAPAN    
                                                                            
                                                                            
                                  (SEE PLATE 3)                             
                                                                            
P_3|CH_1                                                                    
  CHAPTER I                                                                 
-                                                                           
  I had not been at home above ten days, when Captain William               
Robinson, a Cornish man, Commander of the Hope-well, a stout ship of        
three hundred tons, came to my house. I had formerly been surgeon of        
another ship where he was master, and a fourth part owner, in a voyage      
to the Levant; he had always treated me more like a brother than an         
inferior officer, and hearing of my arrival made me a visit, as I           
apprehended only out of friendship, for nothing passed more than            
what is usual after long absences. But repeating his visits often,          
expressing his joy to find me in good health, asking whether I were         
now settled for life, adding that he intended a voyage to the East          
Indies in two months; at last he plainly invited me, though with            
some apologies, to be surgeon of the ship; that I should have               
another surgeon under me besides our two mates; that my salary              
should be double to the usual pay; and that having experienced my           
knowledge in sea affairs to be at least equal to his, he would enter        
into any engagement to follow my advice, as much as if I had share          
in the command.                                                             
  He said so many other obliging things, and I knew him to be so            
honest a man, that I could not reject his proposal; the thirst I had        
of seeing the world, notwithstanding my past misfortunes, continuing        
as violent as ever. The only difficulty that remained, was to persuade      
my wife, whose consent however I at last obtained by the prospect of        
advantage she proposed to her children.                                     
  We set out the 5th of August, 1706, and arrived at Fort St. George        
the 11th of April 1707. We stayed there three weeks to refresh our          
crew, many of whom were sick. From there we went to Tonquin, where the      
Captain resolved to continue some time, because many of the goods he        
intended to buy were not ready, nor could he expect to be dispatched        
in some months. Therefore in hopes to defray some of the charges he         
must be at, he bought a sloop, loaded it with several sorts of              
goods, wherewith the Tonquinese usually trade to the neighboring            
islands, and putting fourteen men on board, whereof three were of           
the country, he appointed me master of the sloop, and gave me power to      
traffic for two months, while he transacted his affairs at Tonquin.         
  We had not sailed more than three days, when a great storm                
arising, we were driven five days to the north-northeast, and then          
to the east; after which we had fair weather, but still with a              
pretty strong gale from the west. Upon the tenth day we were chased by      
two pirates, who soon overtook us, for my sloop was so deep loaden,         
that she sailed very slow, neither were we in a condition to defend         
ourselves.                                                                  
  We were boarded about the same time by both the pirates, who entered      
furiously at the head of their men, but finding us all prostrate            
upon our faces (for so I gave order) they pinioned us with strong           
ropes, and setting a guard upon us, went to search the sloop.               
                                                     {P_3|CH_1 ^paragraph 5}
  I observed among them a Dutchman, who seemed to be of some                
authority, though he was not commander of either ship. He knew us by        
our countenances to be Englishmen, and jabbering to us in his own           
language, swore we should be tied back to back, and thrown into the         
sea. I spoke Dutch tolerably well; I told him who we were, and              
begged him in consideration of our being Christians and Protestants,        
of neighboring countries, in strict alliance, that he would move the        
Captains to take some pity on us. This inflamed his rage; he                
repeated his threatenings, and turning to his companions, spoke with        
great vehemence, in the Japanese language, as I suppose, often using        
the word Christianos.                                                       
  The largest of the two pirate ships was commanded by a Japanese           
Captain, who spoke a little Dutch, but very imperfectly. He came up to      
me, and after several questions, which I answered in great humility,        
he said we should not die. I made the Captain a very low bow, and then      
turning to the Dutchman, said, I was sorry to find more mercy in a          
heathen, than in a brother Christian. But I had soon reason to              
repent those foolish words; for that malicious reprobate, having often      
endeavored in vain to persuade both the Captains that I might be            
thrown into the sea (which they would not yield to after the promise        
made me, that I should not die), however prevailed so far as to have a      
punishment inflicted on me, worse in all human appearance than death        
itself. My men were sent by an equal division into both the pirate          
ships, and my sloop new manned. As to myself, it was determined that I      
should be set adrift in a small canoe, with paddles and a sail, and         
four days' provisions, which last the Japanese Captain was so kind          
to double out of his own stores, and would permit no man to search me.      
I got down into the canoe, while the Dutchman standing upon the deck,       
loaded me with all the curses and injurious terms his language could        
afford.                                                                     
  About an hour before we saw the pirates, I had taken an observation,      
and found we were in the latitude of 46 N. and of longitude 183.            
When I was at some distance from the pirates, I discovered by my            
pocket glass several islands to the southeast. I set up my sail, the        
wind being fair, with a design to reach the nearest of those                
islands, which I made a shift to do in about three hours. It was all        
rocky; however I got many birds' eggs, and striking fire, I kindled         
some heath and dry seaweed, by which I roasted my eggs. I ate no other      
supper, being resolved to spare my provisions as much as I could. I         
passed the night under the shelter of a rock, strowing some heath           
under me, and slept pretty well.                                            
  The next day I sailed to another island, and then to a third and          
fourth, sometimes using my sail, and sometimes my paddles. But not          
to trouble the reader with a particular account of my distresses,           
let it suffice that on the fifth day I arrived at the last island in        
my sight, which lay south-southeast to the former.                          
  This island was at a greater distance than I expected, and I did not      
reach it in less than five hours. I encompassed it almost around            
before I could find a convenient place to land in, which was a small        
creek about three times the wideness of my canoe. I found the island        
to be all rocky, only a little intermingled with tufts of grass and         
sweet smelling herbs. I took out my small provisions, and after having      
refreshed myself, I secured the remainder in a cave, whereof there          
were great numbers. I gathered plenty of eggs upon the rocks, and           
got a quantity of dry seaweed and parched grass, which I designed to        
kindle the next day, and roast my eggs as well as I could. (For I           
had about me my flint, steel, match, and burning glass.) I lay all          
night in the cave where I had lodged my provisions. My bed was the          
same dry grass and seaweed which I intended for fuel. I slept very          
little, for the disquiets of my mind prevailed over my weariness,           
and kept me awake. I considered how impossible it was to preserve my        
life in so desolate a place, and how miserable my end must be. Yet I        
found myself so listless and desponding that I had not the heart to         
rise, and before I could get spirits enough to creep out of my cave         
the day was far advanced. I walked a while among the rocks; the sky         
was perfectly clear, and the sun so hot that I was forced to turn my        
face from it; when all of a sudden it became obscured, as I thought,        
in a manner very different from what happens by the interposition of a      
cloud. I turned back, and perceived a vast opaque body between me           
and the sun, moving forwards towards the island: it seemed to be about      
two miles high, and hid the sun six or seven minutes, but I did not         
observe the air to be much colder, or the sky more darkened, than if I      
had stood under the shade of a mountain. As it approached nearer            
over the place where I was, it appeared to be a firm substance, the         
bottom flat, smooth, and shining very bright from the reflection of         
the sea below. I stood upon a height about two hundred yards from           
the shore, and saw this vast body descending almost to a parallel with      
me, at less than an English mile distance. I took out my pocket             
perspective, and could plainly discover numbers of people moving up         
and down the sides of it, which appeared to be sloping, but what those      
people were doing, I was not able to distinguish.                           
                                                    {P_3|CH_1 ^paragraph 10}
  The natural love of life gave me some inward motions of joy, and I        
was ready to entertain a hope that this adventure might some way or         
other help to deliver me from the desolate place and condition I was        
in. But at the same time the reader can hardly conceive my                  
astonishment, to behold an island in the air, inhabited by men, who         
were able (as it should seem) to raise or sink, or put it into a            
progressive motion, as they pleased. But not being at that time in a        
disposition to philosophise upon this phenomenon, I rather chose to         
observe what course the island would take, because it seemed for a          
while to stand still. Yet soon after it advanced nearer, and I could        
see the sides of it, encompassed with several gradations of galleries,      
and stairs at certain intervals, to descend from one to the other.          
In the lowest gallery I beheld some people fishing with long angling        
rods, and others looking on. I waved my cap (for my hat was long since      
worn out) and my handkerchief towards the island; and upon its              
nearer approach, I called and shouted with the utmost strength of my        
voice; and then looking circumspectly, I beheld a crowd gather to that      
side which was most in my view. I found by their pointing towards me        
and to each other, that they plainly discovered me, although they made      
no return to my shouting. But I could see four or five men running          
in great haste up the stairs to the top of the island, who then             
disappeared. I happened rightly to conjecture, that these were sent         
for orders to some person in authority upon this occasion.                  
  The number of people increased, and in less than half an hour the         
island was moved and raised in such a manner, that the lowest               
gallery appeared in a parallel of less than a hundred yards distance        
from the height where I stood. I then put myself into the most              
supplicating postures, and spoke in the humblest accent, but                
received no answer. Those who stood nearest over against me seemed          
to be persons of distinction, as I supposed by their habit. They            
conferred earnestly with each other, looking often upon me. At              
length one of them called out in a clear, polite, smooth dialect,           
not unlike in sound to the Italian; and therefore I returned an answer      
in that language, hoping at least that the cadence might be more            
agreeable to his ears. Although neither of us understood the other,         
yet my meaning was easily known, for the people saw the distress I was      
in.                                                                         
  They made signs for me to come down from the rock and go towards the      
shore, which I accordingly did; and the flying island being raised          
to a convenient height, the verge directly over me, a chain was let         
down from the lowest gallery, with a seat fastened to the bottom, to        
which I fixed myself, and was drawn up by pulleys.                          
                                                                            
P_3|CH_2                                                                    
  CHAPTER II                                                                
-                                                                           
  At my alighting I was surrounded by a crowd of people, but those who      
stood nearest seemed to be of better quality. They beheld me with           
all the marks and circumstances of wonder; neither indeed was I much        
in their debt, having never till then seen a race of mortals so             
singular in their shapes, habits, and countenances. Their heads were        
all reclined either to the right or the left; one of their eyes turned      
inward, and the other directly up to the zenith. Their outward              
garments were adorned with the figures of suns, moons, and stars,           
interwoven with those of fiddles, flutes, harps, trumpets, guitars,         
harpsichords, and many other instruments of music, unknown to us in         
Europe. I observed here and there many in the habit of servants,            
with a blown bladder fastened like a flail to the end of a short            
stick, which they carried in their hands. In each bladder was a             
small quantity of dried pease, or little pebbles (as I was                  
afterwards informed). With these bladders they now and then flapped         
the mouths and ears of those who stood near them, of which practice         
I could not then conceive the meaning; it seems the minds of these          
people are so taken up with intense speculations, that they neither         
can speak, nor attend to the discourses of others, without being            
roused by some external taction upon the organs of speech and hearing;      
for which reason those persons who are able to afford it always keep a      
flapper (the original is climenole) in their family, as one of their        
domestics, nor ever walk abroad or make visits without him. And the         
business of this officer is, when two or more persons are in                
company, gently to strike with his bladder the mouth of him who is          
to speak, and the right ear of him or them to whom the speaker              
addresses himself. This flapper is likewise employed diligently to          
attend his master in his walks, and upon occasion to give him a soft        
flap on his eyes, because he is always so wrapped up in cogitation,         
that he is in manifest danger of falling down every precipice, and          
bouncing his head against every post, and in the streets, of                
jostling others, or being jostled himself into the kennel.                  
  It was necessary to give the reader this information, without             
which he would be at the same loss with me, to understand the               
proceedings of these people, as they conducted me the stairs, to the        
top of the island, and from there to the royal palace. While we were        
ascending, they forgot several times what they were about, and left         
me to myself, till their memories were again roused by their                
flappers; for they appeared altogether unmoved by the sight of my           
foreign habit and countenance, and by the shouts of the vulgar,             
whose thoughts and minds were more disengaged.                              
  At last we entered the palace, and proceeded into the chamber of          
presence, where I saw the King seated on his throne, attended on            
each side by persons of prime quality. Before the throne was a large        
table filled with globes and spheres, and mathematical instruments          
of all kinds. His Majesty took not the least notice of us, although         
our entrance was not without sufficient noise, by the concourse of all      
persons belonging to the court. But he was then deep in a problem, and      
we attended at least an hour, before he could solve it. There stood by      
him on each side a young page, with flaps in their hands, and when          
they saw he was at leisure, one of them gently struck his mouth, and        
the other his right ear; at which he started like one awakened on           
the sudden, and looking towards me and the company I was in,                
recollected the occasion of our coming, whereof he had been informed        
before. He spoke some words, whereupon immediately a young man with         
a flap came up to my side, and flapped me gently on the right ear; but      
I made signs, as well as I could, that I had no occasion for such an        
instrument; which, as I afterwards found, gave his Majesty and the          
whole court a very mean opinion of my understanding. The King, as           
far as I could conjecture, asked me several questions, and I addressed      
myself to him in all the languages I had. When it was found that I          
could neither understand nor be understood, I was conducted by the          
King's order to an apartment in his palace (this prince being               
distinguished above all his predecessors for his hospitality to             
strangers), where two servants were appointed to attend me. My              
dinner was brought, and four persons of quality, whom I remembered          
to have seen very near the King's person, did me the honor to dine          
with me. We had two courses of three dishes each. In the first              
course there was a shoulder of mutton, cut into an equilateral              
triangle, a piece of beef into a rhomboides, and a pudding into a           
cycloid. The second course was two ducks, trussed up into the form          
of fiddles; sausages and puddings resembling flutes and hautboys,           
and a breast of veal in the shape of a harp. The servants cut our           
bread into cones, cylinders, parallelograms, and several other              
mathematical figures.                                                       
  While we were at dinner, I made bold to ask the names of several          
things in their language; and those noble persons, by the assistance        
of their flappers, delighted to give me answers, hoping to raise my         
admiration of their great abilities, if I could be brought to converse      
with them. I was soon able to call for bread and drink, or whatever         
else I wanted.                                                              
  After dinner my company withdrew, and a person was sent to me by the      
King's order, attended by a flapper. He brought with him pen, ink, and      
paper, and three or four books, giving me to understand by signs, that      
he was sent to teach me the language. We sat together four hours, in        
which time I wrote down a great number of words in columns, with the        
translations over against them. I likewise made a shift to learn            
several short sentences. For my tutor would order one of my servants        
to fetch something, to turn about, to make a bow, to sit, or stand, or      
walk, and the like. Then I took down the sentence in writing. He            
showed me also in one of his books the figures of the sun, moon, and        
stars, the zodiac, the tropics, and polar circles, together with the        
denominations of many figures of planes and solids. He gave me the          
names and descriptions of all the musical instruments, and the general      
terms of art in playing on each of them. After he had left me, I            
placed all my words with their interpretations in alphabetical              
order. And thus in a few days, by the help of a very faithful               
memory, I got some insight into their language.                             
                                                     {P_3|CH_2 ^paragraph 5}
  The word, which I interpret the Flying or Floating Island, is in the      
original Laputa, whereof I could never learn the true etymology. Lap        
in the old obsolete language signifies high, and untuh, a governor,         
from which they say by corruption was derived Laputa, from Lapuntuh.        
But I do not approve of this derivation, which seems to be a little         
strained. I ventured to offer to the learned among them a conjecture        
of my own, that Laputa was quasi lap outed; lap signifying properly         
the dancing of the sunbeams in the sea, and outed, a wing, which            
however I shall not obtrude, but submit to the judicious reader.            
  Those to whom the King had entrusted me, observing how ill I was          
clad, ordered a tailor to come next morning, and take my measure for a      
suit of clothes. This operator did his office after a different manner      
from those of his trade in Europe. He first took my height by a             
quadrant, and then with a rule and compasses described the                  
dimensions and outlines of my whole body, all which he entered upon         
paper, and in six days brought my clothes very ill made, and quite out      
of shape, by happening to mistake a figure in the calculation. But          
my comfort was, that I observed such accidents very frequent, and           
little regarded.                                                            
  During my confinement for want of clothes, and by an indisposition        
that held me some days longer, I much enlarged my dictionary; and when      
I went next to court, was able to understand many things the King           
spoke, and to return him some kind of answers. His Majesty had given        
orders that the island should move northeast and by east, to the            
vertical point over Lagado, the metropolis of the whole kingdom             
below upon the firm earth. It was about ninety leagues distant, and         
our voyage lasted four days and an half. I was not in the least             
sensible of the progressive motion made in the air by the island. On        
the second morning about eleven o'clock, the King himself in person,        
attended by his nobility, courtiers, and officers, having prepared all      
their musical instruments, played on them for three hours without           
intermission, so that I was quite stunned with the noise; neither           
could I possibly guess the meaning, till my tutor informed me. He said      
that the people of their island had their ears adapted to hear the          
music of the spheres, which always played at certain periods, and           
the court was now prepared to bear their part in whatever instrument        
they most excelled.                                                         
  In our journey towards Lagado, the capital city, his Majesty ordered      
that the island should stop over certain towns and villages, from           
whence he might receive the petitions of his subjects. And to this          
purpose several packthreads were let down with small weights at the         
bottom. On these packthreads the people strung their petitions,             
which mounted up directly like the scraps of paper fastened by              
school boys at the end of the string that holds their kite.                 
Sometimes we received wine and victuals from below, which were drawn        
up by pulleys.                                                              
  The knowledge I had in mathematics gave me great assistance in            
acquiring their phraseology, which depended much upon that science and      
music; and in the latter I was not unskilled. Their ideas are               
perpetually conversant in lines and figures. If they would, for             
example, praise the beauty of a woman, or any other animal, they            
describe it by rhombs, circles, parallelograms, ellipses, and other         
geometrical terms, or by words of art drawn from music, needless            
here to repeat. I observed in the King's kitchen all sorts of               
mathematical and musical instruments, after the figures of which            
they cut up the joints that were served to his Majesty's table.             
                                                    {P_3|CH_2 ^paragraph 10}
  Their houses are very ill built, the walls bevel without one right        
angle in any apartment, and this defect arises from the contempt            
they bear to practical geometry, which they despise as vulgar and           
mechanic, those instructions they give being too refined for the            
intellectuals of their workmen, which occasions perpetual mistakes.         
And although they are dexterous enough upon a piece of paper in the         
management of the rule, the pencil, and the divider, yet in the common      
actions and behavior of life, I have not seen a more clumsy,                
awkward, and unhandy people, nor so slow and perplexed in their             
conceptions upon all other subjects, except those of mathematics and        
music. They are very bad reasoners, and vehemently given to                 
opposition, unless when they happen to be of the right opinion,             
which is seldom their case. Imagination, fancy, and invention, they         
are wholly strangers to, nor have any words in their language by which      
those ideas can be expressed; the whole compass of their thoughts           
and mind being shut up within the two forementioned sciences.               
  Most of them, and especially those who deal in the astronomical           
part, have great faith in judicial astrology, although they are             
ashamed to own it publicly. But what I chiefly admired, and thought         
altogether unaccountable, was the strong disposition I observed in          
them towards news and politics, perpetually enquiring into public           
affairs, giving their judgments in matters of state, and                    
passionately disputing every inch of a party opinion. I have indeed         
observed the same disposition among most of the mathematicians I            
have known in Europe, although I could never discover the least             
analogy between the two sciences; unless those people suppose, that         
because the smallest circle hath as many degrees as the largest,            
therefore the regulation and management of the world require no more        
abilities than the handling and turning of a globe. But I rather            
take this quality to spring from a very common infirmity of human           
nature, inclining us to be more curious and conceited in matters where      
we have least concern, and for which we are least adapted either by         
study or nature.                                                            
  These people are under continual disquietudes, never enjoying a           
minute's peace of mind; and their disturbances proceed from causes          
which very little affect the rest of mortals. Their apprehensions           
arise from several changes they dread in the celestial bodies. For          
instance, that the earth, by the continual approaches of the sun            
towards it, must in course of time be absorbed or swallowed up. That        
the face of the sun will by degrees be encrusted with its own               
effluvia, and give no more light to the world. That the earth very          
narrowly escaped a brush from the tail of the last comet, which             
would have infallibly reduced it to ashes; and that the next, which         
they have calculated for thirty-one years hence, will probably destroy      
us. For if in its perihelion it should approach within a certain            
degree of the sun (as by their calculations they have reason to dread)      
it will conceive a degree of heat ten thousand times more intense than      
that of red-hot glowing iron; and in its absence from the sun, carry a      
blazing tail ten hundred thousand and fourteen miles long; through          
which if the earth should pass at the distance of one hundred thousand      
miles from the nucleus or main body of the comet, it must in its            
passage be set on fire, and reduced to ashes. That the sun daily            
spending its rays without any nutriment to supply them, will at last        
be wholly consumed and annihilated; which must be attended with the         
destruction of this earth, and of all the planets that receive their        
light from it.                                                              
  They are so perpetually alarmed with the apprehensions of these           
and the like impending dangers, that they can neither sleep quietly in      
their beds, nor have any relish for the common pleasures or amusements      
of life. When they meet an acquaintance in the morning, the first           
question is about the sun's health, how he looked at his setting and        
rising, and what hopes they have to avoid the stroke of the                 
approaching comet. This conversation they are apt to run into with the      
same temper that boys discover, in delighting to hear terrible stories      
of sprites and hobgoblins, which they greedily listen to, and dare not      
go to bed for fear.                                                         
  The women of the island have abundance of vivacity: they contemn          
their husbands, and are exceedingly fond of strangers, whereof there        
is always a considerable number from the continent below, attending at      
court, either upon affairs of the several towns and corporations, or        
their own particular occasions, but are much despised, because they         
want the same endowments. Among these the ladies choose their               
gallants: but the vexation is, that they act with too much ease and         
security, for the husband is always so rapt in speculation, that the        
mistress and lover may proceed to the greatest familiarities before         
his face, if he be but provided with paper and implements, and without      
his flapper at his side.                                                    
                                                    {P_3|CH_2 ^paragraph 15}
  The wives and daughters lament their confinement to the island,           
although I think it the most delicious spot of ground in the world;         
and although they live here in the greatest plenty and magnificence,        
and are allowed to do whatever they please, they long to see the            
world, and take the diversions of the metropolis, which they are not        
allowed to do without a particular license from the King; and this          
is not easy to be obtained, because the people of quality have found        
by frequent experience how hard it is to persuade their women to            
return from below. I was told that a great court lady, who had several      
children, is married to the prime minister, the richest subject in the      
kingdom, a very graceful person, extremely fond of her, and lives in        
the finest palace of the island, went down to Lagado, on the                
pretense of health, there hid herself for several months, till the          
King sent a warrant to search for her, and she was found in an obscure      
eatinghouse all in rags, having pawned her clothes to maintain an           
old deformed footman, who beat her every day, and in whose company she      
was taken much against her will. And although her husband received her      
with all possible kindness, and without the least reproach, she soon        
after contrived to steal down again with all her jewels, to the same        
gallant, and has not been heard of since.                                   
  This may perhaps pass with the reader rather for an European or           
English story, than for one of a country so remote. But he may              
please to consider, that the caprices of are not limited by any             
climate or nation, and that they are much more uniform than can be          
easily imagined.                                                            
  In about a month's time I had made a tolerable proficiency in             
their language, and was able to answer most of the King's questions,        
when I had the honor to attend him. His Majesty discovered not the          
least curiosity to inquire into the laws, government, history,              
religion, or manners of the countries where I had been, but confined        
his questions to the state of mathematics, and received the account         
I gave him with great contempt and indifference, though often roused        
by his flapper on each side.                                                
                                                                            
P_3|CH_3                                                                    
  CHAPTER III                                                               
-                                                                           
  I desired leave of this prince to see the curiosities of the island,      
which he was graciously pleased to grant, and ordered my tutor to           
attend me. I chiefly wanted to know to what cause in art or in              
nature it owed its several motions, whereof I will now give a               
philosophical account to the reader.                                        
  The Flying or Floating Island is exactly circular, its diameter 7837      
yards, or about four miles and a half, and consequently contains ten        
thousand acres. It is three hundred yards thick. The bottom or under        
surface, which appears to those who view it from below, is one even         
regular plate of adamant, shooting up to the height of about two            
hundred yards. Above it lie the several minerals in their usual order,      
and over all is a coat of rich mold, ten or twelve feet deep. The           
declivity of the upper surface, from the circumference to the               
center, is the natural cause why all the dews and rains which fall          
upon the island, are conveyed in small rivulets toward the middle,          
where they are emptied into four large basins, each of about half a         
mile in circuit, and two hundred yards distant from the center. From        
these basins the water is continually exhaled by the sun in the             
daytime, which effectually prevents their overflowing. Besides, as          
it is in the power of the monarch to raise the island above the region      
of clouds and vapors, he can prevent the falling of dews and rains          
whenever he pleases. For the highest clouds cannot rise above two           
miles, as naturalists agree, at least they were never known to do so        
in that country.                                                            
  At the centre of the island there is a chasm about fifty yards in         
diameter, from whence the astronomers descend into a large dome, which      
is therefore called Flandona Gagnole, or the Astronomer's Cave,             
situated at the depth of a hundred yards beneath the upper surface          
of the adamant. In this cave are twenty lamps continually burning,          
which from the reflection of the adamant cast a strong light into           
every part. The place is stored with great variety of sextants,             
quadrants, telescopes, astrolabes, and other astronomical instruments.      
But the greatest curiosity, upon which the fate of the island depends,      
is a loadstone of a prodigious size, in shape resembling a weaver's         
shuttle. It is in length six yards, and in the thickest part at             
least three yards over. This magnet is sustained by a very strong axle      
of adamant passing through its middle, upon which it plays, and is          
poised so exactly that the weakest hand can turn it. It is hooped           
round with a hollow cylinder of adamant, four feet deep, as many            
thick, and twelve yards in diameter, placed horizontally, and               
supported by eight adamantine feet, each six yards high. In the middle      
of the concave side there is a groove twelve inches deep, in which the      
extremities of the axle are lodged, and turned round as there is            
occasion.                                                                   
  The stone cannot be moved from its place by any force, because the        
hoop and its feet are one continued piece with that body of adamant         
which constitutes the bottom of the island.                                 
  By means of this loadstone, the island is made to rise and fall, and      
move from one place to another. For with respect to that part of the        
earth over which the monarch presides, the stone is endued at one of        
its sides with an attractive power, and at the other with a repulsive.      
Upon placing the magnet erect with its attracting end towards the           
earth, the island descends; but when the repelling extremity points         
downwards, the island mounts directly upwards. When the position of         
the stone is oblique, the motion of the island is so too. For in            
this magnet the forces always act in lines parallel to its direction.       
                                                     {P_3|CH_3 ^paragraph 5}
                             (SEE PLATE 4)                                  
  By this oblique motion the island is conveyed to different parts          
of the monarch's dominions. To explain the manner of its progress, let      
AB represent a line drawn cross the dominions of Balnibarbi, let the        
line cd represent the loadstone, of which let d be the repelling            
end, and c the attracting end, the island being over C; let the             
stone be placed in the position cd, with its repelling end                  
downwards; then the island will be driven upwards obliquely towards D.      
When it is arrived at D, let the stone be turned upon its axle, till        
its attracting end points towards E, and then the island will be            
carried obliquely towards E; where if the stone be again turned upon        
its axle till it stands in the position EF, with its repelling point        
downwards, the island will rise obliquely towards F, where by               
directing the attracting end towards G, the island may be carried to        
G, and from G to H, by turning the stone, so as to make its                 
repelling extremity point directly downwards. And thus by changing the      
situation of the stone as often as there is occasion, the island is         
made to rise and fall by turns in an oblique direction, and by those        
alternate risings and fallings (the obliquity being not                     
considerable) is conveyed from one part of the dominions to the other.      
  But it must be observed that this island cannot move beyond the           
extent of the dominions below, nor can it rise above the height of          
four miles. For which the astronomers (who have written large               
systems concerning the stone) assign the following reason: that the         
magnetic virtue does not extend beyond the distance of four Miles, and      
that the mineral which acts upon the stone in the bowels of the earth,      
and in the sea about six leagues distant from the shore, is not             
diffused through the whole globe, but terminated with the limits of         
the King's dominions; and it was easy from the great advantage of such      
a superior situation, for a prince to bring under his obedience             
whatever country lay within the attraction of that magnet.                  
  When the stone is put parallel to the plane of the horizon, the           
island stands still; for in that case the extremities of it being at        
equal distance from the earth, act with equal force, the one in             
drawing downwards, the other in pushing upwards, and consequently no        
motion can ensue.                                                           
  This loadstone is under the care of certain astronomers, who from         
time to time give it such positions as the monarch directs. They spend      
the greatest part of their lives in observing the celestial bodies,         
which they do by the assistance of glasses far excelling ours in            
goodness. For although their largest telescopes do not exceed three         
feet, they magnify much more than those of a hundred yards among us,        
and at the same time show the stars with greater clearness. This            
advantage has enabled them to extend their discoveries much farther         
than our astronomers in Europe; for they have made a catalogue of           
ten thousand fixed stars, whereas the largest of ours do not contain        
above one third part of that number. They have likewise discovered two      
lesser stars, or satellites, which revolve about Mars, whereof the          
innermost is distant from the center of the primary planet exactly          
three of his diameters, and the outermost five; the former revolves in      
the space of ten hours, and the latter in twenty-one and a half; so         
that the squares of their periodical times are very near in the same        
proportion with the cubes of their distance from the center of Mars,        
which evidently shows them to be governed by the same law of                
gravitation that influences the other heavenly bodies.                      
                                                    {P_3|CH_3 ^paragraph 10}
  They have observed ninety-three different comets, and settled             
their periods with great exactness. If this be true (and they affirm        
it with great confidence), it is much to be wished that their               
observations were made public, whereby the theory of comets, which          
at present is very lame and defective, might be brought to the same         
perfection with other parts of astronomy.                                   
  The King would be the most absolute prince in the universe, if he         
could but prevail on a ministry to join with him; but these having          
their estates below on the continent, and considering that the              
office of a favorite has a very uncertain tenure, would never               
consent to the enslaving their country.                                     
  If any town should engage in rebellion or mutiny, fall into               
violent factions, or refuse to pay the usual tribute, the King has two      
methods of reducing them to obedience. The first and the mildest            
course by keeping the island hovering over such a town, and the             
lands about it, whereby he can deprive them of the benefit of the           
sun and the rain, and consequently afflict the inhabitants with dearth      
and diseases. And if the crime deserve it, they are at the same time        
pelted from above with great stones, against which they have no             
defense but by creeping into cellars or caves, while the roofs of           
their houses are beaten to pieces. But if they still continue               
obstinate, or offer to raise insurrections, he proceeds to the last         
remedy, by letting the island drop directly upon their heads, which         
makes a universal destruction both of houses and men. However, this is      
an extremity to which the prince is seldom driven, neither indeed is        
he willing to put it in execution, nor dare his ministers advise him        
to an action, which as it would render them odious to the people, so        
it would be a great damage to their own estates, which lie all              
below, for the island is the King's demesne.                                
  But there is still indeed a more weighty reason, why the kings of         
this country have been always averse from executing so terrible an          
action, unless upon the utmost necessity. For if the town intended          
to be destroyed should have in it any tall rocks, as it generally           
falls out in the larger cities, a situation probably chosen at first        
with a view to prevent such a catastrophe; or if it abound in high          
spires, or pillars of stone, a sudden fall might endanger the bottom        
or under surface of the island, which, although it consist, as I            
have said, of one entire adamant two hundred yards thick, might happen      
to crack by too great a shock, or burst by approaching too near the         
fires from the houses below, as the backs both of iron and stone            
will often do in our chimneys. Of all this the people are well              
apprised, and understand how far to carry their obstinacy, where their      
liberty or property is concerned. And the King, when he is highest          
provoked, and most determined to press a city to rubbish, orders the        
island to descend with great gentleness, out of a pretense of               
tenderness to his people, but indeed for fear of breaking the               
adamantine bottom; in which case it is the opinion of all their             
philosophers that the loadstone could no longer hold it up, and the         
whole mass would fall to the ground.                                        
  About three years before my arrival among them, while the King was        
in his progress over his dominions, there happened an extraordinary         
accident which had like to have put a period to the fate of that            
monarchy, at least as it is now instituted. Lindalino, the second city      
in the kingdom, was the first his Majesty visited in his progress.          
Three days after his departure the inhabitants, who had often               
complained of great oppressions, shut the town gates, seized on the         
governor, and with incredible speed and labor erected four large            
towers, one at every corner of the city (which is an exact square),         
equal in height to a strong pointed rock that stands directly in the        
center of the city. Upon the top of each tower, as well as upon the         
rock, they fixed a great loadstone, and in case their design should         
fail, they had provided a vast quantity of the most combustible             
fuel, hoping to burst therewith the adamantine bottom of the island,        
if the loadstone project should miscarry.                                   
                                                    {P_3|CH_3 ^paragraph 15}
  It was eight months before the King had perfect notice that the           
Lindalinians were in rebellion. He then commanded that the island           
should be wafted over the city. The people were unanimous, and had          
laid in stores of provisions, and a great river runs through the            
middle of the town. The King hovered over them several days to deprive      
them of the sun and the rain. He ordered many packthreads to be let         
down, yet not a person offered to send up a petition, but instead           
thereof very bold demands, the redress of all their grievances,             
great immunities, the choice of their own governor, and other like          
exorbitances. Upon which his Majesty commanded all the inhabitants          
of the island to cast great stones from the lower gallery into the          
town; but the citizens had provided against this mischief by conveying      
their persons and effects into the four towers, and other strong            
buildings, and vaults underground.                                          
  The King being now determined to reduce this proud people, ordered        
that the island should descend gently within forty yards of the top of      
the towers and rock. This was accordingly done; but the officers            
employed in that work found the descent much speedier than usual,           
and by turning the loadstone could not without great difficulty keep        
it in a firm position, but found the island inclining to fall. They         
sent the King immediate intelligence of this astonishing event, and         
begged his Majesty's permission to raise the island higher; the King        
consented, a general council was called, and the officers of the            
loadstone ordered to attend. One of the oldest and most expert among        
them obtained leave to try an experiment. He took a strong line of a        
hundred yards, and the island being raised over the town above the          
attracting power they had felt, he fastened a piece of adamant to           
the end of his line, which had in it a mixture of iron mineral, of the      
same nature with that whereof the bottom or lower surface of the            
island is composed, and from the lower gallery let it down slowly           
towards the top of the towers. The adamant was not descended four           
yards, before the officer felt it drawn so strongly downward that he        
could hardly pull it back. He then threw down several small pieces          
of adamant, and observed that they were all violently attracted by the      
top of the tower. The same experiment was made on the other three           
towers, and on the rock with the same effect.                               
  This incident broke entirely the King's measures, and (to dwell no        
longer on other circumstances) he was forced to give the town their         
own conditions.                                                             
  I was assured by a great minister that if the island had descended        
so near the town as not to be able to raise itself, the citizens            
were determined to fix it for ever, to kill the King and all his            
servants, and entirely change the government.                               
  By a fundamental law of this realm, neither the king, nor either          
of his two elder sons, are permitted to leave the island; nor the           
queen, till she is past child-bearing.                                      
                                                                            
P_3|CH_4                                                                    
  CHAPTER IV                                                                
-                                                                           
  Although I cannot say that I was ill treated in this island, yet I        
must confess I thought myself too much neglected, not without some          
degree of contempt. For neither prince nor people appeared to be            
curious in any part of knowledge, except mathematics and music,             
wherein I was far their inferior, and upon that account very little         
regarded.                                                                   
  On the other side, after having seen all the curiosities of the           
island, I was very desirous to leave it, being heartily weary of those      
people. They were indeed excellent in two sciences for which I have         
great esteem, and wherein I am not unversed; but at the same time so        
abstracted and involved in speculation, that I never met with such          
disagreeable companions. I conversed only with women, tradesmen,            
flappers, and court pages, during two months of my abode there, by          
which at last I rendered myself extremely contemptible; yet these were      
the only people from whom I could ever receive a reasonable answer.         
  I had obtained by hard study a good degree of knowledge in their          
language; I was weary of being confined to an island where I                
received so little countenance, and resolved to leave it with the           
first opportunity.                                                          
  There was a great lord at court, nearly related to the King, and for      
that reason alone used with respect. He was universally reckoned the        
most ignorant and stupid person among them. He had performed many           
eminent services for the crown, had great natural and acquired              
parts, adorned with integrity and honor, but so ill an ear for              
music, that his detractors reported he had been often known to beat         
time in the wrong place; neither could his tutors without extreme           
difficulty teach him to demonstrate the most easy proposition in the        
mathematics. He was pleased to show me many marks of favor, often           
did me the honor of a visit, desired to be informed in the affairs          
of Europe, the laws and customs, the manners and learning of the            
several countries where I had traveled. He listened to me with great        
attention, and made very wise observations on all I spoke. He had           
two flappers attending him for state, but never made use of them            
except at court, and in visits of ceremony, and would always command        
them to withdraw when we were alone together.                               
  I entreated this illustrious person to intercede in my behalf with        
his Majesty for leave to depart, which he accordingly did, as he was        
pleased to tell me, with regret: for indeed he had made me several          
offers very advantageous, which however I refused with expressions          
of the highest acknowledgment.                                              
                                                     {P_3|CH_4 ^paragraph 5}
  On the 16th day of February I took leave of his Majesty and the           
court. The King made me a present to the value of about two hundred         
pounds English, and my protector his kinsman as much more, together         
with a letter of recommendation to a friend of his in Lagado, the           
metropolis. The island being then hovering over a mountain about two        
miles from it, I was let down from the lowest gallery, in the same          
manner as I had been taken up.                                              
  The continent, as far as it is subject to the monarch of the              
Flying Island, passes under the general name of Balnibarbi, and the         
metropolis, as I said before, is called Lagado. I felt some little          
satisfaction in finding myself on firm ground. I walked to the city         
without any concern, being clad like one of the natives, and                
sufficiently instructed to converse with them. I soon found out the         
person's house to whom I was ended, presented my letter from his            
friend the grandee in the island, and was received with much kindness.      
This great lord, whose name was Munodi, ordered me an apartment in his      
own house, where I continued during my stay, and was entertained in         
a most hospitable manner.                                                   
  The next morning after my arrival, he took me in his chariot to           
see the town, which is about half the size of London, but the houses        
very strangely built, and most of them out of repair. The people in         
the streets walked fast, looked wild, their eyes fixed, and were            
generally in rags. We passed through one of the town gates, and went        
about three miles into the country, where I saw many laborers               
working with several sorts of tools in the ground, but was not able to      
conjecture what they were about; neither did I observe any expectation      
either of corn or grass, although the soil appeared to be excellent. I      
could not forbear admiring at these odd appearances both in town and        
country, and I made bold to desire my conductor, that he would be           
pleased to explain to me what could be meant by so many busy heads,         
hands, and faces, both in the streets and the fields, because I did         
not discover any good effects they produced; but on the contrary, I         
never knew a soil so unhappily cultivated, houses so ill contrived and      
so ruinous, or a people whose countenances and habit expressed so much      
misery and want.                                                            
  This Lord Munodi was a person of the first rank, and had been some        
years Governor of Lagado, but by a cabal of ministers was discharged        
for insufficiency. However, the King treated him with tenderness, as a      
well-meaning man, but of a low contemptible understanding.                  
  When I gave that free censure of the country and its inhabitants, he      
made no further answer than by telling me that I had not been long          
enough among them to form a judgment, and that the different nations        
of the world had different customs, with other common topics to the         
same purpose. But when we returned to his palace, he asked me how I         
liked the building, what absurdities I observed, and what quarrel I         
had with the dress or looks of his domestics. This he might safely do,      
because every thing about him was magnificent, regular, and polite.         
I answered that his Excellency's prudence, quality, and fortune, had        
exempted him from those defects which folly and beggary had produced        
in others. He said if I would go with him to his country house,             
about twenty miles distant, where his estate lay, there would be            
more leisure for this kind of conversation. I told his Excellency that      
I was entirely at his disposal, and accordingly we set out next             
morning.                                                                    
                                                    {P_3|CH_4 ^paragraph 10}
  During our journey he made me observe the several methods used by         
farmers in managing their lands, which to me were wholly                    
unaccountable; for except in some very few places I could not discover      
one ear of corn or blade of grass. But in three hours' traveling the        
scene was wholly altered; we came into a most beautiful country;            
farmers' houses at small distances, neatly built; the fields enclosed,      
containing vineyards, corn grounds, and meadows. Neither do I remember      
to have seen a more delightful prospect. His Excellency observed my         
countenance to clear up; he told me with a sigh that there his              
estate began, and would continue the same till we should come to his        
house. That his countrymen ridiculed and despised him for managing his      
affairs no better, and for setting so ill an example to the kingdom,        
which however was followed by very few, such as were old, and willful,      
and weak like himself.                                                      
  We came at length to the house, which was indeed a noble                  
structure, built according to the best rules of ancient                     
architecture. The fountains, gardens, walks, avenues, and groves            
were all disposed with exact judgment and taste. I gave due praises to      
every thing I saw, whereof his Excellency took not the least notice         
till after supper, when, there being no third companion, he told me         
with a very melancholy air that he doubted he must thrown down his          
houses in town and country, to rebuild them after the present mode,         
destroy all his plantations, and cast others into such a form as            
modern usage required, and give the same directions to all his              
tenants, unless he would submit to incur the censure of pride,              
singularity, affectation, ignorance, caprice, and perhaps increase his      
Majesty's displeasure.                                                      
  That the admiration I appeared to be under would cease or diminish        
when he had informed me of some particulars, which probably I never         
heard of at court, the people there being too much taken up in their        
own speculations, to have regard to what passed here below.                 
  The sum of his discourse was to this effect. That about forty             
years ago certain persons went up to Laputa, either upon business or        
diversion, and after five months continuance came back with a very          
little smattering in mathematics, but full of volatile spirits              
acquired in that airy region. That these persons upon their return          
began to dislike the management of every thing below, and fell into         
schemes of putting all arts, sciences, languages, and mechanics upon a      
new foot. To this end they procured a royal patent for erecting an          
Academy of Projectors in Lagado; and the humor prevailed so strongly        
among the people, that there is not a town of any consequence in the        
kingdom without such an academy. In these colleges the professors           
contrive new rules and methods of agriculture and building, and new         
instruments and tools for all trades and manufactures, whereby, as          
they undertake, one man shall do the work of ten; a palace may be           
built in a week, of materials so durable as to last forever without         
repairing. All the fruits of the earth shall come to maturity at            
whatever season we think fit to choose, and increase a hundred fold         
more than they do at present, with innumerable other happy                  
proposals. The only inconvenience is, that none of these projects           
are yet brought to perfection, and in the meantime, the whole               
country lies miserably waste, the houses in ruins, and the people           
without food or clothes. By all which, instead of being discouraged,        
they are fifty times more violently bent upon prosecuting their             
schemes, driven equally on by hope and despair; that as for himself,        
being not of an enterprising spirit, he was content to go on in the         
old forms, to live in the houses his ancestors had built, and act as        
they did in every part of life without innovation. That some few other      
persons of quality and gentry had done the same, but were looked on         
with an eye of contempt and ill-will, as enemies to art, ignorant, and      
ill commonwealth's-men, preferring their own ease and sloth before the      
general improvement of their country.                                       
  His Lordship added that he would not by any further particulars           
prevent the pleasure I should certainly take in viewing the grand           
Academy, whither he was resolved I should go. He only desired me to         
observe a ruined building upon the side of a mountain about three           
miles distant, of which he gave me this account. That he had a very         
convenient mill within half a mile of his house, turned by a current        
from a large river, and sufficient for his own family as well as a          
great number of his tenants. That about seven years ago a club of           
those projectors came to him with proposals to destroy this mill,           
and build another on the side of that mountain, on the long ridge           
whereof a long canal must be cut for a repository of water, to be           
conveyed up by pipes and engines to supply the mill; because the            
wind and air upon a height agitated the water, and thereby made it          
fitter for motion; and because the water descending down a declivity        
would turn the mill with half the current of a river whose course is        
more upon a level. He said, that being then not very well with the          
court, and pressed by many of his friends, he complied with the             
proposal; and after employing an hundred men for two years, the work        
miscarried, the projectors went off, laying the blame entirely. upon        
him, railing at him ever since, and putting others upon the same            
experiment, with equal assurance of success, as well as equal               
disappointment.                                                             
                                                    {P_3|CH_4 ^paragraph 15}
  In a few days we came back to town, and his Excellency,                   
considering the bad character he had in the Academy, would not go with      
me himself, but recommended me to a friend of his to bear me company        
thither. My lord was pleased to represent me as a great admirer of          
projects, and a person of much curiosity and easy belief; which indeed      
was not without truth, for I had myself been a sort of projector in my      
younger days.                                                               
                                                                            
P_3|CH_5                                                                    
  CHAPTER V                                                                 
-                                                                           
  This Academy is not an entire single building, but a continuation of      
several houses on both sides of a street, which growing waste was           
purchased and applied to that use.                                          
  I was received very kindly by the Warden, and went for many days          
to the Academy. Every room has in it one or more projectors, and I          
believe I could not be in fewer than five hundred rooms.                    
  The first man I saw was of a meager aspect, with sooty hands and          
face, his hair and beard long, ragged and singed in several places.         
His clothes, shirt, and skin were all of the same color. He had been        
eight years upon a project for extracting sunbeams out of cucumbers,        
which were to be put into vials hermetically sealed, and let out to         
warm the air in raw inclement summers. He told me he did not doubt          
in eight years more he should be able to supply the Governor's gardens      
with sunshine at a reasonable rate; but he complained that his stock        
was low, and entreated me to give him something as an encouragement to      
ingenuity, especially since this had been a very dear season for            
cucumbers. I made him a small present, for my lord had furnished me         
with money on purpose, because he knew their practice of begging            
from all who go to see them.                                                
  I went into another chamber, but was ready to hasten back, being          
almost overcome with a horrible stink. My conductor pressed me              
forward, conjuring me in a whisper to give no offense, which would          
be highly resented, and therefore I dare not so much as stop my             
nose. The projector of this cell was the most ancient student of the        
Academy; his face and beard were of a pale yellow; his hands and            
clothes daubed over with filth. When I was presented to him, he gave        
me a close embrace (a compliment I could well have excused). His            
employment from his first coming into the Academy, was an operation to      
reduce human excrement to its original food, by separating the several      
parts, removing the tincture which it receives from the gall, making        
the odor exhale, and off the saliva. He had a weekly allowance from         
the society, of a vessel filled with human ordure about the size of         
a Bristol barrel.                                                           
  I saw another at work to calcine ice into gunpowder, who likewise         
showed me a treatise he had written concerning the malleability of          
fire, which he intended to publish.                                         
                                                     {P_3|CH_5 ^paragraph 5}
  There was a most ingenious architect who had contrived a new              
method for building houses, by beginning at the roof, and working           
downwards to the foundation, which he justified to me by the like           
practice of those two prudent insects, the bee and the spider.              
  There was a man born blind, who had several apprentices in his own        
condition; their employment was to mix colors for painters, which           
their master taught them to distinguish by feeling and smelling. It         
was indeed my misfortune to find them at that time not very perfect in      
their lessons, and the professor himself happened to be generally           
mistaken; this artist is much encouraged and esteemed by the whole          
fraternity.                                                                 
  In another apartment I was highly pleased with a projector, who           
had found a device of ploughing the ground with hogs, to save the           
charges of plows, cattle, and labor. The method in this: in an acre of      
ground you bury, at six inches distance and eight deep, a quantity          
of acorns, dates, chestnuts, and other mast or vegetables whereof           
these animals are fondest; then you drive six hundred or more of            
them into the field, where in a few days they will root up the whole        
ground in search of their food, and make it fit for sowing, at the          
same time manuring it with their dung. It is true, upon experiment          
they found the charge and trouble very great, and they had little or        
no crop. However, it is not doubted that this invention may be capable      
of great improvement.                                                       
  I went into another room, where the walls and ceiling were all            
hung round with cobwebs, except a narrow passage for the artist to          
go in and out. At my entrance he called aloud to me not to disturb his      
webs. He lamented the fatal mistake the world had been so long in of        
using silk worms, while we had such plenty of domestic insects, who         
infinitely excelled the former, because they understood how to weave        
as well as spin. And he proposed farther that by employing spiders the      
charge of dyeing silks should be wholly saved, whereof I was fully          
convinced when he showed me a vast number of flies most beautifully         
colored, wherewith he fed his spiders, assuring us that the webs would      
take a tincture from them; and as he had them of all hues, he hoped to      
fit everybody's fancy, as soon as he could find proper food for the         
flies, of certain gums, oils, and other glutinous matter to give a          
strength and consistence to the threads.                                    
  There was an astronomer who had undertaken to place a sundial upon        
the great weathercock on the townhouse, by adjusting the annual and         
diurnal motions of the earth and sun, so as to answer and coincide          
with all accidental turnings by the wind.                                   
                                                    {P_3|CH_5 ^paragraph 10}
  I was complaining of a small fit of the colic, upon which my              
conductor led me into a room, where a great physician resided, who was      
famous for curing that disease by contrary operations from the same         
instrument. He had a large pair of bellows with a long slender              
muzzle of ivory. This he conveyed eight inches up the anus, and             
drawing in the wind, he affirmed he could make the guts as lank as a        
dried bladder. But when the disease was more stubborn and violent,          
he let in the muzzle While the bellows were full of wind, which he          
discharged into the body of the patient, then withdrew the                  
instrument to replenish it, clapping his thumb strongly against the         
orifice of the fundament; and this being repeated three or four times,      
the adventitious wind would rush out, bringing the noxious along            
with it (like water put into a pump), and the patient recover. I saw        
him try both experiments upon a dog, but could not discern any              
effect from the former. After the latter, the animal was ready to           
burst, and made so violent a discharge, as was very offensive to me         
and my companions. The dog died on the spot, and we left the doctor         
endeavoring to recover him by the same operation.                           
  I visited many other apartments, but shall not trouble my reader          
with all the curiosities I observed, being studious of brevity.             
  I had hitherto seen only one side of the Academy, the other being         
appropriated to the advancers of speculative learning, of which I           
shall say something when I have mentioned one illustrious person more,      
who is called among them the universal artist. He told us he had            
been thirty years employing his thoughts for the improvement of             
human life. He had two large rooms full of wonderful curiosities,           
and fifty men at work. Some were condensing air into a dry tangible         
substance, by extracting the nitre, and letting the aqueous or fluid        
particles percolate; others softening marbles for pillows and               
pin-cushions; others petrifying the hoofs of a living horse to              
preserve them from foundering. The artist himself was at that time          
busy upon two great designs; the first, to sow land with chaff,             
wherein he affirmed the true seminal virtue to be contained, as he          
demonstrated by several experiments which I was not skillful enough to      
comprehend. The other was, by a certain composition of gums, minerals,      
and vegetables outwardly applied, to prevent the growth of wool upon        
two young lambs; and he hoped in a reasonable time to propagate the         
breed of naked sheep all over the kingdom.                                  
  We crossed a walk to the other part of the Academy, where, as I have      
already said, the projectors in speculative learning resided.               
  The first professor I saw was in a very large room, with forty            
pupils about him. After salutation, observing me to look earnestly          
upon a frame, which took up the greatest part of both the length and        
breadth of the room, he said perhaps I might wonder to see him              
employed in a project for improving speculative knowledge by practical      
and mechanical operations. But the world would soon be sensible of its      
usefulness, and he flattered himself that a more noble exalted thought      
never sprang in any other man's head. Everyone knew how laborious           
the usual method is of attaining to arts and sciences; whereas by           
his contrivance the most ignorant person at a reasonable charge, and        
with a little bodily labor, may write books in philosophy, poetry,          
politics, law, mathematics, and theology, without the least assistance      
from genius or study. He then led me to the frame, about the sides          
whereof all his pupils stood in ranks. It was twenty feet square,           
placed in the middle of the room. The superficies was composed of           
several bits of wood, about the bigness of a die, but some larger than      
others. They were all linked together by slender wires. These bits          
of wood were covered on every square with paper pasted on them, and on      
these papers were written all the words of their language, in their         
several moods, tenses, and declensions, but without any order. The          
professor then desired me to observe, for he was going to set his           
engine at work. The pupils at his command took each of them hold of an      
iron handle, whereof there were forty fixed round the edges of the          
frame, and giving them a sudden turn, the whole disposition of the          
words was entirely changed. He then commanded thirty-six of the lads        
to read the several lines softly as they appeared upon the frame;           
and where they found three or four words together that might make part      
of a sentence, they dictated to the four remaining boys who were            
scribes. This work was repeated three or four times, and at every turn      
the engine was so contrived that the words shifted into new places, as      
the square bits of wood moved upside down.                                  
                                                    {P_3|CH_5 ^paragraph 15}
  Six hours a day the young students were employed in this labor,           
and the professor showed me several volumes in large folio already          
collected, of broken sentences, which he intended to piece together,        
and out of those rich materials to give the world a complete body of        
all arts and sciences; which however might be still improved, and much      
expedited, if the public would raise a fund for making and employing        
five hundred such frames in Lagado, and oblige the managers to              
contribute in common their several collections.                             
                           (SEE PLATE 5)                                    
  He assured me, that this invention had employed all his thoughts          
from his youth, that he had emptied the whole vocabulary into his           
frame, and made the strictest computation of the general proportion         
there is in books between the numbers of particles, nouns, and              
verbs, and other parts of speech.                                           
  I made my humblest acknowledgement to this illustrious person for         
his great communicativeness, and promised if ever I had the good            
fortune to return to my native country, that I would do him justice,        
as the sole inventor of this wonderful machine; the form and                
contrivance of which I desired leave to delineate upon paper, as in         
the figure here annexed. I told him, although it were the custom of         
our learned in Europe to steal inventions from each other, who had          
thereby at least this advantage, that it became a controversy which         
was the right owner, yet I would take such caution, that he should          
have the honor entire without a rival.                                      
  We next went to the school of languages, where three professors           
sat in consultation upon improving that of their own country.               
                                                    {P_3|CH_5 ^paragraph 20}
  The first project was to shorten discourse by cutting                     
polysyllables into one, and leaving out verbs and participles, because      
in reality all things imaginable are but nouns.                             
  The other project was a scheme for entirely abolishing all words          
whatsoever; and this was urged as a great advantage in point of health      
as well as brevity. For it is plain that every word we speak is in          
some degree a diminution of our lungs by corrosion, and consequently        
contributes to the shortening of our lives. An expedient was therefore      
offered, that since words are only names for things, it would be            
more convenient for all men to carry about them such things as were         
necessary to express the particular business they are to discourse on.      
And this invention would certainly have taken place, to the great ease      
as well as health of the subject, if the women, in conjunction with         
the vulgar and illiterate, had not threatened to raise a rebellion,         
unless they might be allowed the liberty to speak with their                
tongues, after the manner of their ancestors; such constant                 
irreconcilable enemies to science are the common people. However, many      
of the most learned and wise adhere to the new scheme of expressing         
themselves by things, which has only this inconvenience attending           
it, that if a man's business be very great, and of various kinds, he        
must be obliged in proportion to carry a greater bundle of things upon      
his back, unless he can afford one or two strong servants to attend         
him. I have often beheld two of those sages almost sinking under the        
weight of their packs, like pedlars among us; who, when they met in         
the streets, would lay down their loads, open their sacks, and hold         
conversation for an hour together; then put up their implements,            
help each other to resume their burdens, and take their leave.              
  But for short conversations a man may carry implements in his             
pockets and under his arms, enough to supply him, and in his house          
he cannot be at a loss. Therefore the room where company meet who           
practise this art, is full of all things ready at hand, requisite to        
furnish matter for this kind of artificial converse.                        
  Another great advantage proposed by this invention was that it would      
serve as a universal language to be understood in all civilized             
nations, whose goods and utensils are generally of the same kind, or        
nearly resembling, so that their uses might easily be comprehended.         
And thus ambassadors would be qualified to treat with foreign               
princes or ministers of state, to whose tongues they were utter             
strangers.                                                                  
  I was at the mathematical school, where the master taught his pupils      
after a method scarce imaginable to us in Europe. The proposition           
and demonstration were fairly written on a thin wafer, with ink             
composed of a cephalic tincture. This the student was to swallow            
upon a fasting stomach, and for three days following eat nothing but        
bread and water. As the wafer digested, the tincture mounted to his         
brain, bearing the proposition along with it. But the success has           
not hitherto been answerable, partly by some error in the quantum or        
composition, and partly by the perverseness of lads, to whom this           
bolus is so nauseous, that they generally steal aside, and discharge        
it upwards before it can operate; neither have they been yet persuaded      
to use so long an abstinence as the prescription required.                  
                                                                            
P_3|CH_6                                                                    
  CHAPTER VI                                                                
-                                                                           
  In the school of political projectors I was but ill entertained, the      
professors appearing in my judgment wholly out of their senses,             
which is a scene that never fails to make me melancholy. These unhappy      
people were proposing schemes for persuading monarchs to choose             
favorites upon the score of their wisdom, capacity, and virtue; of          
teaching ministers to consult the public good; of rewarding merit,          
great abilities, eminent services; of instructing princes to know           
their true interest by placing it on the same foundation with that          
of their people; of choosing for employments persons qualified to           
exercise them; with many other wild impossible chimeras, that never         
entered before into the heart of man to conceive, and confirmed in          
me the old observation, that there is nothing so extravagant and            
irrational which some philosophers have not maintained for truth.           
  But however I shall so far do justice to this part of the Academy,        
as to acknowledge that all of them were not so visionary. There was         
a most ingenious doctor who seemed to be perfectly versed in the whole      
nature and system of government. This illustrious person had very           
usefully employed his studies in finding out effectual remedies for         
all diseases and corruptions, to which the several kinds of public          
administration are subject by the vices or infirmities of those who         
govern, as well as by the licentiousness of those who are to obey. For      
instance, whereas all writers and reasoners have agreed, that there is      
a strict universal resemblance between the natural and the political        
body; can there be anything more evident, than that the health of both      
must be preserved, and the cured by the same prescriptions? It is           
allowed that senates and great councils are often troubled with             
redundant, ebullient, and other peccant humors, with many diseases          
of the head, and more of the heart; with strong convulsions, with           
grievous contractions of the nerves and sinews in both hands, but           
especially the right; with spleen, flatus, vertigos, and deliriums;         
with scrofulous tumors full of fetid purulent matter; with sour frothy      
ructations, with canine appetites and crudeness of digestion,               
besides many others needless to mention. This doctor therefore              
proposed, that upon the meeting of a senate, certain physicians should      
attend at the three first days of their sitting, and at the close of        
each day's debate, feel the pulses of every senator; after which,           
having maturely considered, and consulted upon the nature of the            
several maladies, and the methods of cure, they should on the fourth        
day return to the senate house, attended by their apothecaries              
stored with proper medicines; and before the members sat, administer        
to each of them lenitives, aperitives, abstersives, corrosives,             
restringents, palliatives, laxatives, cephalalgics, icterics,               
apophlegmatics, acoustics, as their several cases required; and             
according as these medicines should operate, repeat, alter, or omit         
them at the next meeting.                                                   
  This project could not be of any great expense to the public, and         
would, in my poor opinion, be of much use for the dispatch of business      
in those countries where senates have any share in the legislative          
power; beget unanimity, shorten debates, open a few mouths which are        
now closed, and close many more which are now open; curb the petulancy      
of the young, and correct the positiveness of the old; rouse the            
stupid, and damp the pert.                                                  
  Again, because it is a general complaint, that the favorites of           
princes are troubled with short and weak memories, the same doctor          
proposed, that whoever attended a first minister, after having told         
his business with the utmost brevity and in the plainest words, should      
at his departure give the said minister a tweak by the nose, or a kick      
in the belly, or tread on his corns, or lug him thrice by both ears,        
or pin into his breech, or pinch his arm black and blue, to prevent         
forgetfulness; and at every levee day repeat the same operation,            
till the business were done or absolutely refused.                          
  He likewise directed, that every senator in the great council of a        
nation, after he had delivered his opinion, and argued in the               
defense of it, should be obliged to give his vote directly contrary;        
because if that were done, the result would infallibly terminate in         
the good of the public.                                                     
                                                     {P_3|CH_6 ^paragraph 5}
  When parties in a state are violent, he offered a wonderful               
contrivance to reconcile them. The method is this. You take a               
hundred leaders of each party, you dispose them into couples of such        
whose heads are nearest of a size; then let two nice operators saw off      
the occiput of each couple at the same time, in such a manner that the      
brain may be equally divided. Let the occiputs thus cut off be              
interchanged, applying each to the head of his opposite party-man.          
It seems indeed to be a work that requires some exactness, but the          
professor assured us that if it were dexterously performed the cure         
would be infallible. For he argued thus; that the two half brains           
being left to debate the matter between themselves within the space of      
one skull, would soon come to a good understanding, and produce that        
moderation, as well as regularity of thinking, so much to be wished         
for in the heads of those who imagine they come into the world only to      
watch and govern its motion: and as to the difference of brains in          
quantity or quality among those who are directors in faction, the           
doctor assured us from his own knowledge that it was a perfect trifle.      
  I heard a very warm debate between two professors, about the most         
commodious and effectual ways and means of raising money without            
grieving the subject. The first affirmed the most just method would be      
to lay a certain tax upon vices and folly, and the sum fixed upon           
every man to be rated after the fairest manner by a jury of his             
neighbors. The second was of an opinion directly contrary, to tax           
those qualities of body and mind for which men chiefly value                
themselves, the rate to be more or less according to the degrees of         
excelling, the decision whereof should be left entirely to their own        
breast. The highest tax was upon men who are the greatest favorites of      
the other sex, and the assessments according to the number and natures      
of the favors they have received; for which they are allowed to be          
their own vouchers. Wit, valor, and politeness were likewise                
proposed to be largely taxed, and collected in the same manner, by          
every person's giving his own word for the quantum of what he               
possessed. But as to honor, justice, wisdom, and learning, they should      
not be taxed at all, because they are qualifications of so singular         
a kind, that no man will either allow them in his neighbor, or value        
them in himself.                                                            
  The women were proposed to be taxed according to their beauty and         
skill in dressing, wherein they had the same privilege with the men,        
to be determined by their own judgment. But constancy, chastity,            
good sense, and good nature were not rated, because they would not          
bear the charge of collecting.                                              
  To keep senators in the interest of the crown, it was proposed            
that the members should raffle for employments, every man first taking      
an oath, and giving security that he would vote for the court, whether      
he won or not; after which the losers had in their turn the liberty of      
raising upon the next vacancy. Thus hope and expectation would be kept      
alive, none would complain of broken promises, but impute their             
disappointments wholly to fortune, whose shoulders are broader and          
stronger than those of a ministry.                                          
  Another professor showed me a large paper of instructions for             
discovering plots and conspiracies against the government. He               
advised great statesmen to examine into the diet of all suspected           
persons; their times of eating; upon which side they lay in bed;            
with which hand they wiped their posteriors; to take a strict view          
of their excrements, and, from the color, the odor, the taste, the          
consistence, the crudeness of maturity of digestion, form a judgment        
of their thoughts and designs. Because men are never so serious,            
thoughtful, and intent, as when they are at stool, which he found by        
frequent experiment; for in such conjunctures, when he used merely          
as a trial to consider which was the best way of murdering the king,        
his ordure would have a tincture of green, but quite different when he      
thought only of raising an insurrection or burning the metropolis.          
                                                    {P_3|CH_6 ^paragraph 10}
  The whole discourse was written with great acuteness, containing          
many observations both curious and useful for politicians, but as I         
conceived not altogether complete. This I ventured to tell the author,      
and offered if he pleased to supply him with some additions. He             
received my proposition with more compliance than is usual among            
writers, especially those of the projecting species, professing he          
would be glad to receive further information.                               
  I told him that in the kingdom of Tribnia, by the natives called          
Langden, where I had sojourned some time in my travels, the bulk of         
the people consist in a manner wholly of discoverers, witnesses,            
informers, accusers, prosecutors, evidences, swearers, together with        
their several subservient and subaltern instruments, all under the          
colors and conduct of ministers of state and their deputies. The plots      
in that kingdom are usually the workmanship of those persons who            
desire to raise their own characters of profound politicians, to            
restore new vigor to a crazy administration, to stifle or divert            
general discontents, to fill their pockets with forfeitures, and raise      
or sink the opinion of public credit, as either shall best answer           
their private advantage. It is first agreed and settled among them,         
what suspected persons shall be accused of a plot; then, effectual          
care is taken to secure all their letters and papers, and put the           
criminals in chains. These papers are delivered to a set of artists,        
very dexterous in finding out the mysterious meanings of words,             
syllables, and letters. For instance, they can discover a                   
close-stool to signify a privy council; a flock of geese, a senate;         
a lame dog, an invader; a codshead, a ---; the plague, a standing           
army; a buzzard, a prime minister; the gout, a high priest; a               
gibbet, a secretary of state; a chamber-pot, a committee of                 
grandees; a sieve, a court lady; a broom, a revolution; a mousetrap,        
an employment; a bottomless pit, the treasury; a sink, the court; a         
cap-and bells, a favorite; a broken reed, a court of justice; an empty      
tun, a general; a running sore, the administration.                         
  When this method fails, they have two others more effectual, which        
the learned among them call acrostics and anagrams. First they can          
decipher all initial letters into political meanings. Thus, N. shall        
signify a plot; B. a regiment of horse; L. a fleet at sea; or secondly      
by transposing the letters of the alphabet in any suspected paper,          
they can discover the deepest designs of a discontented party. So           
for example if I should say in a letter to a friend, Our brother Tom        
has just got the piles, a skillful decipherer would discover that           
the same letters which compose that sentence may be analyzed into           
the following words: Resist -- a plot is brought home -- the tour. And      
this is the anagrammatic method.                                            
  The professor made me great acknowledgments for communicating             
these observations, and promised to make honorable mention of me in         
his treatise.                                                               
  I saw nothing in this country that could invite me to a longer            
continuance, and began to think of returning home to England.               
                                                                            
P_3|CH_7                                                                    
  CHAPTER VII                                                               
-                                                                           
  The continent of which this kingdom is a part extends itself, as I        
have reason to believe, eastward to that unknown tract of America,          
westward to California, and north to the Pacific Ocean, which is not        
above a hundred and fifty miles from Lagado, where there is a good          
port and much commerce with the great island of Luggnagg, situated          
to the northwest about 29 degrees north latitude, and 140 longitude.        
The island of Luggnagg stands southeastward of Japan, about a               
hundred leagues distant. There is a strict alliance between the             
Japanese Emperor and the King of Luggnagg, which affords frequent           
opportunities of sailing from one island to the other. I determined         
therefore to direct my course this way, in order to my return to            
Europe. I hired two mules with a guide to show me the way, and carry        
my small baggage. I took leave of my noble protector, who had shown me      
so much favor and made me a generous present at my departure.               
  My journey was without any accident or adventure worth relating.          
When I arrived at the port of Maldonada (for so it is called) there         
was no ship in the harbor bound for Luggnagg, nor likely to be in some      
time. The town is about as large as Portsmouth. I soon fell into            
some acquaintance, and was very hospitably received. A gentleman of         
distinction said to me that since the ships bound for Luggnagg could        
not be ready in less than a month, it might be no disagreeable              
amusement for me to take a trip to the little island of                     
Glubbdubdrib, about five leagues off to the southwest. He offered           
himself and a friend to accompany me, and that I should be provided         
with a small convenient barque for the voyage.                              
  Glubbdubdrib, as nearly as I can interpret the word, signifies the        
Island of Sorcerers or Magicians. It is about one-third as large as         
the Isle of Wight, and extremely fruitful; it is governed by the            
head of a certain tribe, who are all magicians. This tribe marries          
only among each other, and the eldest in succession is Prince or            
Governor. He has a noble palace, and a park of about three thousand         
acres, surrounded by a wall of hewn stone twenty feet high. In this         
park are several small enclosures for cattle, corn, and gardening.          
  The Governor and his family are served and attended by domestics          
of a kind somewhat unusual. By his skill in necromancy, he has a power      
of calling whom he pleases from the dead, and commanding their service      
for twenty-four hours, but no longer; nor can he call the same persons      
up again in less than three months, except upon very extraordinary          
occasions.                                                                  
  When we arrived at the island, which was about eleven in the              
morning, one of the gentlemen who accompanied me, went to the               
Governor, and desired admittance for a stranger, who came on purpose        
to have the honor of attending on his Highness. This was immediately        
granted, and we all three entered the gate of the palace between two        
rows of guards, armed and dressed after a very antic manner, and            
something in their countenances that made my flesh creep a horror I         
cannot express. We passed through several apartments, between servants      
of the same sort, ranked on each side as before, till we came to the        
chamber of presence, where after three profound obeisances, and a           
few general questions, we were permitted to sit on three stools near        
the lowest step of his Highness's throne. He understood the language        
of Balnibarbi, although it were different from that of his island.          
He desired me to give him some account of my travels; and to let me         
see that I should be treated without ceremony, he dismissed all his         
attendants with a turn of his finger, at which to my great                  
astonishment they vanished in an instant, like visions in a dream,          
when we awake on a sudden. I could not recover myself in some time,         
till the Governor assured me that I should receive no hurt; and             
observing my two companions to be under no concern, who had been often      
entertained in the same manner, I began to take courage, and related        
to his Highness a short history of my several adventures, yet not           
without some hesitation, and frequently looking behind me to the place      
where I had seen those domestic specters. I had the honor to dine with      
the Governor, where a new set of ghosts served up the meat, and waited      
at table. I now observed myself to be less terrified than I had been        
in the morning. I stayed till sunset, but humbly desired his                
Highness to excuse me for not accepting his invitation of lodging in        
the palace. My two friends and I lay at a private house in the town         
adjoining, which is the capital of this little island; and the next         
morning we returned to pay our duty to the Governor, as he was pleased      
to command us.                                                              
                                                     {P_3|CH_7 ^paragraph 5}
  After this manner we continued in the island for ten days, most part      
of every day with the Governor, and at night in our lodging. I soon         
grew so familiarized to the sight of spirits, that the third or fourth      
time they gave me no emotion at all; or if I had any apprehensions          
left, my curiosity prevailed over them. For his Highness the                
Governor ordered me to call up whatever persons I would choose to           
name, and in whatever numbers among all the dead from the beginning of      
the world to the present time, and command them to answer any               
questions I should think fit to ask; with this condition, that my           
questions must be confined within the compass of the times they             
lived in. And one thing I might depend upon, that they would certainly      
tell me truth, for lying was a talent of no use in the lower world.         
  I made my humble acknowledgments to his Highness for so great a           
favor. We were in a chamber from whence there was a fair prospect into      
the park. And because my first inclination was to be entertained            
with scenes of pomp and magnificence, I desired to see Alexander the        
Great, at the head of his army just after the battle of Arbela;             
which upon a notion of the Governor's finger immediately appeared in a      
large field under the window where we stood. Alexander was called up        
into the room; it was with great difficulty that I understood his           
Greek, and had but little of my own. He assured me upon his honor that      
he was not poisoned, but died of a fever by excessive drinking.             
  Next I saw Hannibal passing the Alps, who told me he had not a            
drop of vinegar in his camp.                                                
  I saw Caesar and Pompey at the head of their troops, just ready to        
engage. I saw the former in his last great triumph. I desired that the      
senate of Rome might appear before me in one large chamber, and an          
assembly of somewhat a latter age in counterview in another. The first      
seemed to be an assembly of heroes and demigods; the other a knot of        
pedlars, pickpockets, highway-men, and bullies.                             
  The Governor at my request gave the sign for Caesar and Brutus to         
advance towards us. I was struck with a profound veneration at the          
sight of Brutus, and could easily discover the most consummate virtue,      
the greatest intrepidity and firmness of mind, the truest love of           
his country, and general benevolence for mankind in every lineament of      
his countenance. I observed with much pleasure that these two               
persons were in good intelligence with each other, and Caesar freely        
confessed to me that the greatest actions of his own life were not          
equal by many degrees to the glory of taking it away. I had the             
honor to have much conversation with Brutus; and was told, that his         
ancestor Junius, Socrates, Epaminondas, Cato the younger, Sir Thomas        
More, and himself were perpetually together: a sextumvirate to which        
all the ages of the world cannot add a seventh.                             
                                                    {P_3|CH_7 ^paragraph 10}
  It would be tedious to trouble the reader with relating what vast         
numbers of illustrious persons were called up, to gratify that              
insatiable desire I had to see the world in every period of                 
antiquity placed before me. I chiefly fed my eyes with beholding the        
destroyers of tyrants and usurpers, and the restorers of liberty to         
oppressed and injured nations. But it is impossible to express the          
satisfaction I received in my own mind, after such a manner as to make      
it a suitable entertainment to the reader.                                  
                                                                            
P_3|CH_8                                                                    
  CHAPTER VIII                                                              
-                                                                           
  Having a desire to see those ancients who were most renowned for wit      
and learning, I set apart one day on purpose. I proposed that Homer         
and Aristotle might appear at the head of all their commentators;           
but these were so numerous that some hundreds were forced to attend in      
the court and outward rooms of the palace. I knew and could                 
distinguish those two heroes at first sight, not only from the crowd        
but from each other. Homer was the taller and comelier person of the        
two, walked very erect for one of his age, and his eyes were the            
most quick and piercing I ever beheld. Aristotle stooped much, and          
made use of a staff. His visage was meager, his hair lank and thin,         
and his voice hollow. I soon discovered that both of were perfect           
strangers to the rest of the company, and had never seen or heard of        
them before. And I had a whisper from a ghost, who shall be                 
nameless, that these commentators always kept in the most distant           
quarters from their principals in the lower world, through a                
consciousness of shame and guilt, because they had so horribly              
misrepresented the meaning of those authors to posterity. I introduced      
Didymus and Eustathius to Homer, and prevailed on him to treat them         
better than perhaps they deserved; for he soon found they wanted a          
genius to enter into the spirit of a poet. But Aristotle was out of         
all patience with the account I gave him of Scotus and Ramus, as I          
presented them to him; and he asked them whether the rest of the tribe      
were as great dunces as themselves.                                         
  I then desired the Governor to call up Descartes and Gassendi,            
with whom I prevailed to explain their systems to Aristotle. This           
great philosopher freely acknowledged his own mistakes in natural           
philosophy, because he proceeded in many things upon conjecture, as         
all men must do; and he found, that Gassendi, who had made the              
doctrine of Epicurus as palatable as he could, and the vortices of          
Descartes, were equally exploded. He predicted the same fate to             
attraction, whereof the present learned are such zealous asserters. He      
said that new systems of nature were but new fashions, which would          
vary in every age; and even those who pretend to demonstrate them from      
mathematical principles, would flourish but a short period of time,         
and be out of vogue when that was determined.                               
  I spent five days in conversing with many others of the ancient           
learned. I saw most of the first Roman emperors. I prevailed on the         
Governor to call up Eliogabalus's cooks to dress us a dinner, but they      
could not show us much of their skill, for want of materials. A             
helot of Agesilaus made us a dish of Spartan broth, but I was not able      
to get down a second spoonful.                                              
  The two gentlemen who conducted me to the island were pressed by          
their private affairs to return in three days, which I employed in          
seeing some of the modern dead, who had made the greatest figure for        
two or three hundred years past in our own and other countries of           
Europe; and having been always a great admirer of old illustrious           
families, I desired the Governor call up a dozen or two of kings            
with their ancestors in order for eight or nine generations. But my         
disappointment was grevious and unexpected. For instead of a long           
train with royal diadems, I saw in one family two fiddlers, three           
spruce courtiers, and an Italian prelate. In another, a barber, an          
abbot, and two cardinals. I have too great a veneration for crowned         
heads to dwell any longer on so nice a subject. But as to counts,           
marquesses, dukes, earls, and the like, I was not so scrupulous. And I      
confess it was not without some pleasure that I found myself able to        
trace the particular features, by which certain families are                
distinguished, up to their originals. I could plainly discover from         
whence one family derives a long chin, why a second has abounded            
with knaves for two generations, and fools for two more; why a third        
happened to be crack-brained, and a fourth to be sharpers. Whence it        
came what Polydore Virgil says of a certain great house, Nec vir            
fortis, nec femina casta. How cruelty, falsehood, and cowardice grew        
to be characteristics by which certain families are distinguished as        
much as by their coat of arms. Who first brought the pox into a             
noble house, which has lineally descended in scrofulous tumors to           
their posterity. Neither could I wonder at all this, when I saw such        
an interruption of lineages by pages, lackeys, valets, coachmen,            
gamesters, captains and pickpockets.                                        
  I was chiefly disgusted with modern history. For having strictly          
examined all the persons of greatest name in the courts of princes for      
a hundred years past, I found how the world had been misled by              
prostitute writers, to ascribe the greatest exploits in war to              
cowards, the wisest counsel to fools, sincerity to flatterers, Roman        
virtue to betrayers of their country, piety to atheists, chastity to        
sodomites, informers. How many innocent and excellent persons had been      
condemned to death or banishment, by the practising of great ministers      
upon the corruption of judges, and the malice of factions. How many         
villains had been exalted to the highest places of trust, power,            
dignity, and profit: how great a share in the motions and events of         
courts, councils, and senates might be challenged by bawds, whores,         
pimps, parasites, and buffoons. How low an opinion I had of human           
wisdom and integrity, when I was truly informed of the springs and          
motives of great enterprises and revolutions in the world, and of           
the contemptible accidents to which they owed their success.                
                                                     {P_3|CH_8 ^paragraph 5}
  Here I discovered the roguery and ignorance of those who pretend          
to write anecdotes, or secret history, who send so many kings to their      
graves with a cup of poison; will repeat the discourse between a            
prince and chief minister, where no witness was by; unlock the              
thoughts and cabinets of ambassadors and secretaries of state, and          
have the perpetual misfortune to be mistaken. Here I discovered the         
secret causes of many great events that have surprised the world,           
how a whore can govern the backstairs, the backstairs a council, and        
the council a senate. A general confessed in my presence, that he           
got a victory purely by the force of cowardice and ill conduct; and an      
admiral, that for want of proper intelligence, he beat the enemy to         
whom he intended to betray the fleet. Three kings protested to me,          
that in their whole reigns they never did once prefer any person of         
merit, unless by mistake or treachery of some minister in whom they         
confided; neither would they do it if they were to live again; and          
they showed with great strength of reason that the royal throne             
could not be supported without corruption, because that positive,           
confident, restive temper, which virtue infused into man, was a             
perpetual clog to public business.                                          
  I had the curiosity to enquire in a particular manner, by what            
method great numbers had procured to themselves high titles of              
honor, and prodigious estates; and I confined my inquiry to a very          
modern period; however, without grating upon present times, because         
I would be sure to give no offense even to foreigners (for I hope           
the reader need not be told that I do not in the least intend my own        
country in what I say upon this occasion), a great number of persons        
concerned were called up, and upon a very slight examination,               
discovered such a scene of infamy, that I cannot reflect upon it            
without some seriousness. Perjury, oppression, subornation, fraud,          
panderism, and the like infirmities, were amongst the most excusable        
arts they had to mention, and for these I gave, as it was                   
reasonable, great allowance. But when some confessed they owed their        
greatness and wealth to sodomy or incest, others to the prostituting        
of their own wives and daughters; others to the betraying of their          
country or their prince; some to poisoning, more to the perverting          
of justice in order to destroy the innocent; I hope I may be                
pardoned if these discoveries inclined me little to abate of that           
profound veneration which I am naturally apt to pay to persons of high      
rank, who ought to be treated with the utmost respect due to their          
sublime dignity, by us their inferiors.                                     
  I had often read of some great services done to princes and               
states, and desired to see the persons by whom those services were          
performed. Upon inquiry I was told that their names were to be found        
on no record, except a few of them whom history has represented as the      
vilest rogues and traitors. As to the rest, I had never once heard          
of them. They all appeared with dejected looks, and in the meanest          
habit, most of them telling me they died in poverty and disgrace,           
and the rest on a scaffold or a gibbet.                                     
  Among the rest there was one person whose case appeared a little          
singular. He had a youth about eighteen years old standing by his           
side. He told me he had for many years been commander of a ship, and        
in the sea fight of Actium had the good fortune to break through the        
enemy's great line of battle, sink three of their capital ships, and        
take a fourth, which was the sole cause of Antony's flight, and of the      
victory that ensued; that the youth standing by him, his only son, was      
killed in action. He added that upon the confidence of some merit, the      
war being at an end, he went to Rome, and solicited at the court of         
Augustus to be preferred to a greater ship, whose commander had been        
killed; but without any regard to his pretensions, it was given to a        
youth who had never seen the sea, the son of Libertine, who waited          
on one of the emperor's mistresses. Returning back to his own               
vessel, he was charged with neglect of duty, and the ship given to a        
favorite page of Publicola, the vice-admiral; whereupon he retired          
to a poor farm at a great distance from Rome, and there ended his           
life. I was so curious to know the truth of this story, that I desired      
Agrippa might be called, who was admiral in that fight. He appeared,        
and confirmed the whole account, but with much more advantage to the        
captain, whose modesty had extenuated or concealed a great part of his      
merit.                                                                      
  I was surprised to find corruption grown so high and so quick in          
that empire, by the force of luxury so lately introduced, which made        
me less wonder at many parallel cases in other countries, where             
vices of all kinds have reigned so much longer, and where the whole         
praise as well as pillage has been engrossed by the chief commander,        
who perhaps had the least title to either.                                  
                                                    {P_3|CH_8 ^paragraph 10}
  As every person called up made exactly the same appearance he had         
done in the world, it gave me melancholy reflections to observe how         
much the race of human kind was degenerate among us, within these           
hundred years past. How the pox under all its consequences and              
denominations had altered every lineament of an English countenance,        
shortened the size of bodies, unbraced the nerves, relaxed the              
sinews and muscles, introduced a sallow complexion, and rendered the        
flesh loose and rancid.                                                     
  I descended so low as to desire that some English yeomen of the           
old stamp might be summoned to appear, once so famous for the               
simplicity of their manners, diet and dress, for justice in their           
dealings, for their true spirit of liberty, for their valor and love        
of their country. Neither could I be wholly unmoved after comparing         
the living with the dead, when I considered how all these pure              
native virtues were prostituted for a piece of money by their               
grandchildren, who in selling their votes, and managing at                  
elections, have acquired every vice and corruption that can possibly        
be learned in a court.                                                      
                                                                            
P_3|CH_9                                                                    
  CHAPTER IX                                                                
-                                                                           
  The day of our departure being come, I took leave of his Highness         
the Governor of Glubbdubdrib, and returned with my two companions to        
Maldonada, where after a fortnight's waiting, a ship was ready to sail      
for Luggnagg. The two gentlemen, and some others, were so generous and      
kind as to furnish me with provisions, and see me on board. I was a         
month in this voyage. We had one violent storm and were under a             
necessity of steering westward to get into the tradewind, which             
holds for above sixty leagues. On the 21st of April, 1709, we sailed        
into the river of Clumegnig, which is a seaport town, at the southeast      
point of Luggnagg. We cast anchor within a league of the town, and          
made a signal for a pilot. Two of them came on board in less than half      
an hour, by whom we were guided between certain shoals and rocks,           
which are very dangerous in the passage, to a large basin, where fleet      
may ride in safety within a cable's length of the town wall.                
  Some of our sailors, whether out of treachery or inadvertence, had        
informed the pilots that I was a stranger and a traveler, whereof           
these gave notice to a custom house officer, by whom I was examined         
very strictly upon my landing. This officer spoke to me in the              
language of Balnibarbi, which by the force of much commerce is              
generally understood in that town, especially by seamen, and those          
employed in the customs. I gave him a short account of some                 
particulars, and made my story as plausible and consistent as I             
could; but I thought it necessary to disguise my country, and call          
myself an Hollander, because my intentions were for Japan, and I knew       
the Dutch were the only Europeans permitted to enter into that              
kingdom. I therefore told the officer, that having been shipwrecked         
on the coast of Balnibarbi, and cast on a rock, I was received up           
into Laputa, or the Flying Island (of which he had often heard), and        
was now endeavoring to get to Japan, from whence I might find a             
convenience of returning to my own country. The officer said I must         
be confined till he could receive orders from court, for which he           
would write immediately, and hoped to receive an answer in a                
fortnight. I was carried to a convenient lodging, with a sentry             
placed at the door; however I had the liberty of a large garden, and        
was treated with humanity enough, being maintained all the time at          
the King's charge. I was visited by several persons, chiefly out of         
curiosity, because it was reported that I came from countries very          
remote of which they had never heard.                                       
  I hired a young man who came in the same ship to be an                    
interpreter; he was a native of Luggnagg, but had lived some years          
at Maldonada, and was a perfect master of both languages. By his            
assistance I was able to hold a conversation with those who came to         
visit me; but this consisted only of their questions, and my answers.       
  The dispatch came from court about the time we expected. It               
contained a warrant for conducting me and my retinue to Traldragdubb        
or Trildrogdrib, for it is pronounced both ways as near as I can            
remember, by a party of ten horse. All my retinue was that poor lad         
for an interpreter, whom I persuaded into my service, and at my humble      
request, we had each of us a mule to ride on. A messenger was               
dispatched half a day's journey before us, to give the King notice          
of my approach, and to desire that his Majesty would please appoint         
a day and hour, when it would be his gracious pleasure that I might         
have the honor to lick the dust before his footstool. This is the           
court style, and I found it to be more than matter of form. For upon        
my admittance two days after my arrival, I was commanded to crawl on        
my belly, and lick the floor as I advanced; but on account of my being      
a stranger, care was taken to have it made so clean that the dust           
was not offensive. However, this was a peculiar grace, not allowed          
to any but persons of the highest rank, when they desire an                 
admittance. Nay, sometimes the floor is strewn with dust on purpose,        
when the person to be admitted happens to have powerful enemies at          
court. And I have seen a great lord with his mouth so crammed, that         
when he had crept to the proper distance from the throne, he was not        
able to speak a word. Neither is there any remedy, because it is            
capital for those who receive an audience to spit or wipe their mouths      
in his Majesty's presence. There is indeed another custom, which I          
cannot altogether approve of. When the king has a mind to put any of        
his nobles to death in a gentle indulgent manner, he commands to            
have the floor strewn with a certain brown powder, of a deadly              
composition, which being licked up infallibly kills him in twenty-four      
hours. But in justice to this prince's great clemency, and the care he      
has of his subject's lives (wherein it were much to be wished that the      
monarchs of Europe would imitate him), it must be mentioned for his         
honor, that strict orders are given to have the infected parts of           
the floor well after every such execution; which if his domestics           
neglect, they are in danger of incurring his royal displeasure. I           
myself heard him give directions, that one of his pages should be           
whipped, whose turn it was to give notice about washing the floor           
after an execution, but maliciously had omitted it; by which neglect a      
young lord of great hopes coming to an audience, was unfortunately          
poisoned, although the King at that time had not design against his         
life. But this good prince was so gracious as to forgive the poor page      
his whipping, upon promise that he would do so no more, without             
special orders.                                                             
  To return from this digression; when I had crept within four yards        
of the throne, I raised myself gently upon my knees, and then striking      
my forehead seven times on the ground, I pronounced the following           
words, as they had been taught me the night before, Ickpling                
gloffthrobb squutserumm blhiop mlashnalt zwin tnodbalkguffh                 
slhiophad gurdlubh asht. This is the compliment established by the          
laws of the land for all persons admitted to the King's presence. It        
may be rendered into English thus: May your Celestial Majesty               
outlive the sun, eleven moons and a half. To this the King returned         
some answer, which although I could not understand, yet I replied as I      
had been directed: Fluft drin yalerick dwuldom prastrad mirpush, which      
properly signifies, My tongue is in the mouth of my friend, and by          
this expression was meant that I desired leave to bring my                  
interpreter; whereupon the young man already mentioned was accordingly      
introduced, by whose intervention I answered as many questions as           
his Majesty could put in over an hour. I spoke in the Balnibarbian          
tongue, and my interpreter delivered my meaning in that of Luggnagg.        
                                                     {P_3|CH_9 ^paragraph 5}
  The King was much delighted with my company, and ordered his              
Bliffmarklub or High Chamberlain, to appoint a lodging in the court         
for me and my interpreter, with a daily allowance for my table, and         
a large purse of gold for my common expenses.                               
  I stayed three months in this country out of perfect obedience to         
his Majesty, who was pleased highly to favor me, and made me very           
honorable offers. But I thought it more consistent with prudence and        
justice to pass the remainder of my days with my wife and family.           
                                                                            
P_3|CH_10                                                                   
  CHAPTER X                                                                 
-                                                                           
  The Luggnaggians are a polite and generous people, and although they      
are not without some share of that pride which is peculiar to all           
Eastern countries, yet they show themselves courteous to strangers,         
especially such who are countenanced by the court. I had many               
acquaintance among persons of the best fashion, and being always            
attended by my interpreter, the conversation we had was not                 
disagreeable.                                                               
  One day in much good company I was asked by a person of quality,          
whether I had seen any of their Struldbrugs, or Immortals. I said I         
had not, and desired he would explain to me what he meant by such an        
appellation applied to a mortal creature. He told me, that                  
sometimes, though very rarely, a child happened to be born in a family      
with a red circular spot in the forehead, directly over the left            
eyebrow, which was an infallible mark that it should never die. The         
spot, as he described it, was about the compass of a silver                 
threepence, but in the course of time grew larger, and changed its          
color; for at twelve years old it became green, so continued till           
twenty-five, then turned to a deep blue; at forty-five it grew coal         
black, and as large as an English shilling, but never admitted any          
further alteration. He said these births were so rare, that he did not      
believe there could be above eleven hundred struldbrugs of both             
sexes in the whole kingdom, of which he computed about fifty in the         
metropolis, and among the rest a young girl born about three years          
ago. That these productions were not peculiar to any family, but a          
mere effect of chance; and the children of the struldbrugs                  
themselves were equally mortal with the rest of the people.                 
  I freely own myself to have been struck with inexpressible delight        
upon hearing this account, and the person who gave it me happening          
to understand the Balnibarbian language, which I spoke very well, I         
could not forbear breaking out into expressions perhaps a little too        
extravagant. I cried out as in a rapture: Happy nation where every          
child hath at least a chance for being immortal! Happy people who           
enjoy so many living examples of ancient virtue, and have masters           
ready to instruct them in the wisdom of all former ages! but, happiest      
beyond all comparison are those excellent struldbrugs, who being            
born exempt from that universal calamity of human nature, have their        
minds free and disengaged, without the weight and depression of             
spirits caused by the continual apprehension of death. I discovered my      
admiration that I had not observed any of these illustrious persons at      
court; the black spot on the forehead being so remarkable a                 
distinction, that I could not have easily overlooked and it was             
impossible that his Majesty, a most judicious prince, should not            
provide himself with a good number of such wise and able counselors.        
Yet perhaps the virtue of those reverend sages was too strict for           
the corrupt and libertine manners of a court. And we often find by          
experience that young men are too opinionative and volatile to be           
guided by the sober dictates of their seniors. However, since the King      
was pleased to allow me access to his royal person, I was resolved          
upon the very first occasion to deliver my opinion to him on this           
matter freely and at large, by the help of my interpreter; and whether      
he would please to take my advice or not, yet in one thing I was            
determined, that his Majesty having frequently offered me an                
establishment in this country, I would with great thankfulness              
accept the favor, and pass my life here in the conversation of those        
superior beings the struldbrugs, if they would please to admit me.          
  The gentleman to whom I addressed my discourse, because (as I have        
already observed) he spoke the language of Balnibarbi, said to me with      
a sort of a smile, which usually arises from pity to the ignorant,          
that he was glad of any occasion to keep me among them, and desired my      
permission to explain to the company what I had spoke. He did so,           
and they talked together for some time in their own language,               
whereof I understood not a syllable, neither could I observe by             
their countenances what impression my discourse had made on them.           
After a short silence, the same person told me that his friends and         
mine (so he thought fit to express himself) were very much pleased          
with the judicious remarks I had made on the great happiness and            
advantages of immortal life; and they were desirous to know in a            
particular manner, what scheme of living I should have formed to            
myself, if it had fallen to my lot to have been born a struldbrug.          
  I answered, it was easy to be eloquent on so copious and                  
delightful a subject, especially to me who have been often apt to           
amuse myself with visions of what I should do if I were a king, a           
general, or a great lord; and upon this very case I had frequently run      
over the whole system how I should employ myself and pass the time          
if I were sure to live for ever.                                            
                                                    {P_3|CH_10 ^paragraph 5}
  That if it had been my good fortune to come into the world a              
struldbrug, as soon as I could discover my own happiness by                 
understanding the difference between life and death, I would first          
resolve by an arts and methods whatsoever to procure myself riches. In      
the pursuit of which by thrift and management, I might reasonably           
expect, in about two hundred years to be the wealthiest man in the          
kingdom. In the second place, I would from my earliest youth apply          
myself to the study of arts and sciences, by which I should arrive          
in time to excell all others in learning. Lastly, I would carefully         
record every action and event of consequence that happened in the           
public, impartially draw the characters of the several successions          
of princes and great ministers of state, with my own observations on        
every point. I would exactly set down the several changes in                
customs, language, fashions of dress, diet and diversions. By all           
which acquirements, I should be a living treasury of knowledge and          
wisdom, and certainly become the oracle of the nation.                      
  I would never marry after threescore, but live in an hospitable           
manner, yet still on the saving side. I would entertain myself in           
forming and directing the minds of hopeful young men, by convincing         
them from my own remembrance, experience and observation, fortified by      
numerous examples, of the usefulness of virtue in public and private        
life. But my choice and constant companions should be a set of my           
own immortal brotherhood, among whom I would elect a dozen from the         
most ancient down to my own contemporaries. Where any of these              
wanted fortunes, I would provide them with convenient lodges round          
my own estate, and have some of them always at my table, only mingling      
a few of the most valuable among you mortals, whom length of time           
would harden me to lose with little or no reluctance, and treat your        
posterity after the same manner; just as a man diverts himself with         
the annual succession of pinks and tulips in his garden, without            
regretting the loss of those which withered the preceding year.             
  These struldbrugs and I would mutually communicate our                    
observations and memorials through the course of time, remark the           
several gradations by which corruption steals into the world, and           
oppose it in every step, by giving perpetual warning and instruction        
to mankind; which, added to the strong influence of our own example,        
would probably prevent that continual degeneracy of human nature so         
justly complained of in all ages.                                           
  Add to all this the pleasure of seeing the various revolutions of         
states and empires, the changes in the lower and upper world,               
ancient cities in ruins, and obscure villages become the seats of           
kings. Famous rivers lessening into shallow brooks, the ocean               
leaving one coast dry, and overwhelming another; the discovery of many      
countries yet unknown. Barbarity over-running the politest nations,         
and the most barbarous become civilized. I should then see the              
discovery of the longitude, the perpetual motion, the universal             
medicine, and many other great inventions brought to the utmost             
perfection.                                                                 
  What wonderful discoveries should we make in astronomy, by outliving      
and confirming our own predictions, by observing the progress and           
returns of comets, with the changes of motion in the sun, moon, and         
stars.                                                                      
                                                   {P_3|CH_10 ^paragraph 10}
  I enlarged upon many other topics, which the natural desire of            
endless life and sublunary happiness could easily furnish me with.          
When I had ended, and the sum of my discourse had been interpreted          
as before, to the rest of the company, there was a good deal of talk        
among them the language of the country, not without some laughter at        
my expense. At last the same gentleman who had been my interpreter          
said he was desired by the rest to set me right in a few mistakes,          
which I had fallen into through the common imbecility of human nature,      
and upon that allowance was less answerable for them. That this             
breed of struldbrugs was peculiar to their country, for there were          
no such people either in Balnibarbi or Japan, where he had the honor        
to be ambassador from his Majesty, and found the natives in both those      
kingdoms very hard to believe that the fact was possible; and it            
appeared from my astonishment when he first mentioned the matter to         
me, that I received it as a thing wholly new, and scarcely to be            
credited. That in the two kingdoms above mentioned, where during his        
residence he had conversed very much, he observed long life to be           
the universal desire and wish of mankind. That whoever had one foot in      
the grave was sure to hold back the other as strongly as he could.          
That the oldest had still hopes of living one day longer, and looked        
on death as the greatest evil, from which nature always prompted him        
to retreat; only in this island of Luggnagg the appetite for living         
was not so eager, from the continual example of the struldbrugs before      
their eyes.                                                                 
  That the system of living contrived by me was unreasonable and            
unjust, because it supposed a perpetuity of youth, health, and              
vigor, which no man could be so foolish to hope, however extravagant        
he may be in his wishes. That the question therefore was not whether a      
man would choose to be always in the prime of youth, attended with          
prosperity and health, but how he would pass a perpetual life under         
all the usual disadvantages which old age brings along with it. For         
although few men will avow their desires of being immortal upon such        
hard conditions, yet in the two kingdoms before mentioned of                
Balnibarbi and Japan, he observed that every man desired to put off         
death for some time longer, let it approach ever so late; and he            
rarely heard of any man who died willingly, except he were incited          
by the extremity of grief or torture. And he appealed to me whether in      
those countries I had traveled as well as my own, I had not observed        
the same general disposition.                                               
  After this preface he gave me a particular account of the                 
struldbrugs among them. He said they commonly acted like mortals, till      
about thirty years old, after which by degrees they grew melancholy         
and dejected, increasing in both till they came to fourscore. This          
he learned from their own confession; for otherwise there not being         
above two or three of that species born in an age, they were too few        
to form a general observation by. When they came to fourscore years,        
which is reckoned the extremity of living in this country, they had         
not only all the follies and infirmities of other old men, but many         
more which arose from the dreadful prospect of never dying. They            
were not only opinionative, peevish, covetous, morose, vain,                
talkative, but uncapable of friendship, and dead to all natural             
affection, which never descended below their grandchildren. Envy and        
impotent desires are their prevailing passions. But those objects           
against which their envy principally directed, are the vices of the         
younger sort, and the deaths of the old. By reflecting on the               
former, they find themselves cut off from all possibility of pleasure;      
and whenever they see a funeral, they lament and repine that others         
have gone to a harbor of rest, to which they themselves never can hope      
to arrive. They have no remembrance of anything but what they               
learned and observed in their youth and middle age, and even that is        
very imperfect. And for the truth or particulars of any fact, it is         
safer to depend on common traditions than upon their best                   
recollections. The least miserable among them appear to be those who        
turn to dotage, and entirely lose their memories; these meet with more      
pity and assistance, because they want many bad qualities which abound      
in others.                                                                  
  If a struldbrug happen to marry one of his own kind, the marriage         
is dissolved of course by the courtesy of the kingdom, as soon as           
the younger of the two comes to be fourscore. For the law thinks it         
a reasonable indulgence, that those who are condemned without any           
fault of their own to a perpetual continuance in the world, should not      
have their misery doubled by the load of a wife.                            
  As soon as they have completed the term of eighty years, they are         
looked on as dead in law; their heirs immediately succeed to their          
estates, only a small pittance is reserved for their support, and           
the poor ones are maintained at the public charge. After that period        
they are held incapable of any employment of trust or profit, they          
cannot purchase lands or take leases, neither are they allowed to be        
witnesses in any cause, either civil or criminal, not even for the          
decision of meers and bounds.                                               
                                                   {P_3|CH_10 ^paragraph 15}
  At ninety they lose their teeth and hair, they have at that age no        
distinction of taste, but eat and drink whatever they can get, without      
relish or appetite. The diseases they were subject to still continue        
without increasing or diminishing. In talking they forget the common        
appellation of things, and the names of persons, even of those who are      
their nearest friends and relations. For the same reason they never         
can amuse themselves with reading, because their memory will not serve      
to carry them from the beginning of a sentence to the end; and by this      
defect they are deprived of the only entertainment whereof they             
might otherwise be capable.                                                 
  The language of this country being always upon the flux, the              
struldbrugs of one age do not understand those of another, neither are      
they able after two hundred years to hold any conversation (farther         
than by a few general words) with their neighbors the mortals; and          
thus they lie under the disadvantage of living like foreigners in           
their own country.                                                          
  This was the account given me of the struldbrugs, as near as I can        
remember. I afterwards saw five or six of different ages, the youngest      
not above two hundred years old, who were brought to me at several          
times by some of my friends; but although they were told that I was         
a great traveler, and had seen all the world, they had not the least        
curiosity to ask me a question; only desired I would give them              
slumskudask, or a token of remembrance, which is a modest way of            
begging, to avoid the law that strictly forbids it, because they are        
provided for by the public, although indeed with a very scanty              
allowance.                                                                  
  They are despised and hated by all sorts of people; when one of them      
is born, it is reckoned ominous, and their birth is recorded very           
particularly; so that you may know their age by consulting the              
registry, which however hath not been kept above a thousand years           
past, or at least hath been destroyed by time or public                     
disturbances. But the usual way of computing how old they are, is by        
asking them what kings or great persons they can remember, and then         
consulting history, for infallibly the last prince in their mind did        
not begin his reign after they were fourscore years old.                    
  They were the most mortifying sight I ever beheld, and the women          
more horrible than the men. Besides the usual deformities in extreme        
old age, they acquired an additional ghastliness in proportion to           
their number of years, which is not to be described; and among half         
a dozen, I soon distinguished which was the eldest, although there          
were not above a century or two between them.                               
                                                   {P_3|CH_10 ^paragraph 20}
  The reader will easily believe, that from what I had heard and seen,      
my keen appetite for perpetuity of life was much abated. I grew             
heartily ashamed of the pleasing visions I had formed, and thought          
no tyrant could invent a death into which I would not run with              
pleasure from such a life. The king heard of all that had passed            
between me and my friends upon this occasion, and rallied me very           
pleasantly, wishing I would send a couple of struldbrugs to my own          
country, to arm our people against the fear of death; but this it           
seems is forbidden by the fundamental laws of the kingdom, or else I        
should have been well content with the trouble and expense of               
transporting them.                                                          
  I could not but agree that the laws of this kingdom relating to           
the struldbrugs, were founded upon the strongest reasons, and such          
as any other country would be under the necessity of enacting in the        
like circumstances. Otherwise, as avarice is the necessary                  
consequent of old age, those immortals would in time become                 
proprietors of the whole nation, and engross the civil power, which,        
for want of abilities to manage, must end in the ruin of the public.        
                                                                            
P_3|CH_11                                                                   
  CHAPTER XI                                                                
-                                                                           
  I thought this account of the Struldbrugs might be some                   
entertainment to the reader, because it seems to be a little out of         
the common way, at least I do not remember to have met the like in any      
book of travels that has come to my hands; and if I am deceived, my         
excuse must be, that it is necessary for travelers, who describe the        
same country, very often to agree in dwelling on the same particulars,      
without deserving the censure of having borrowed or transcribed from        
those who wrote before them.                                                
  There is indeed a perpetual commerce between this kingdom and the         
great empire of Japan, and it is very probable that the Japanese            
authors may have given some account of the struldbrugs; but my stay in      
Japan was so short, and I was so entirely a stranger to that language,      
that I was not qualified to make any inquiries. But I hope the Dutch        
upon this notice will be curious and able enough to supply my defects.      
  His Majesty having often pressed me to accept some employment in his      
court, and finding me absolutely determined to return to my native          
country, was pleased to give me his license to depart, and honored          
me with a letter of recommendation under his own hand to the Emperor        
of Japan. He likewise presented me with four hundred and forty-four         
large pieces of gold (this nation delighting in even numbers), and a        
red diamond which I sold in England for eleven hundred pounds.              
  On the 6th day of May, 1709 I took a solemn leave of his Majesty and      
all my friends. This prince was so gracious as to order a guard to          
conduct me Glanguenstald, which is a royal port to the southwest            
part of the island. In six days I found a vessel ready to carry me          
to Japan, and spent fifteen days in the voyage. We landed at a small        
port town called Xamoschi, situated on the southeast part of Japan;         
the town lies on the western point, where there is a narrow strait,         
leading northward into a long arm of the sea, upon the northwest            
part of which, Yedo the metropolis stands. At landing, I showed the         
custom house officers my letter from the King of Luggnagg to his            
Imperial Majesty. They knew the seal perfectly well; it was as broad        
as the palm of my hand. The impression was, a King lifting up a lame        
beggar from the earth. The magistrates of the town hearing of my            
letter, received me as a public minister. They provided me with             
carriages and servants, and bore my charges to Yedo, where I was            
admitted to an audience, and delivered my letter, which was opened          
with great ceremony, and explained to the Emperor by an interpreter,        
who then gave me notice by his Majesty's order, that I should               
signify my request, and, whatever it were, it should be granted for         
the sake of his royal brother of Luggnagg. This interpreter was a           
person employed to transact affairs with the Hollanders; he soon            
conjectured by my countenance that I was a European, and therefore          
repeated his Majesty's commands in Low Dutch, which he spoke perfectly      
well. I answered (as I had before determined) that I was a Dutch            
merchant, shipwrecked in a very remote country, from whence I traveled      
by sea and land to Luggnagg, and then took shipping for Japan, where I      
knew my countrymen often traded, and with some of these I hoped to get      
an opportunity of returning into Europe: I therefore most humbly            
entreated his royal favor, to give order that I should be conducted in      
safety to Nangasac. To this I added another petition, that for the          
sake of my patron the King of Luggnagg, his Majesty would condescend        
to excuse my performing the ceremony imposed on my countrymen, of           
trampling upon the crucifix, because I had been thrown into his             
kingdom by my misfortunes, without any intention of trading. When this      
latter petition was interpreted to the Emperor, he seemed a little          
surprised, and said he believed I was the first of my countrymen who        
ever made any scruple in this point, and that he began to doubt             
whether I was a real Hollander or not, but rather suspected I must          
be a Christian. However, for the reasons I had offered, but chiefly to      
gratify the King of Luggnagg by an uncommon mark of his favor, he           
would comply with the singularity of my humor; but the affair must          
be managed with dexterity, and his officers should be commanded to let      
me pass as it were by forgetfulness. For he assured me, that if the         
secret should be discovered by my countrymen the Dutch, they would cut      
my throat in the voyage. I returned my thanks by the interpreter for        
so unusual a favor, and some troops being at that time on their             
march to Nangasac, the commanding officer had orders to convey me safe      
thither, with particular instructions about the business of the             
crucifix.                                                                   
  On the 9th day of June, 1709, I arrived at Nangasac, after a very         
long and troublesome journey. I soon fell into the company of some          
Dutch sailors belonging to the Amboyna, of Amsterdam, a stout ship          
of 450 tons. I had lived long in Holland, pursuing my studies at            
Leyden, and I spoke Dutch well. The seamen soon knew from whence I          
came last: they were curious to inquire into my voyages and course          
of life. I made up a story as short and probable as I could, but            
concealed the greatest part. I knew many persons in Holland; I was          
able to invent names for my parents, whom I pretended to be obscure         
people in the province of Gelderland. I would have given the captain        
(one Theodorus Vangrult) what he pleased to ask for my voyage to            
Holland; but understanding I was a surgeon, he was contented to take        
half the usual rate, on condition that I would serve him in the way of      
my calling. Before we took shipping, I was often asked by some of           
the crew whether I had performed the ceremony above mentioned. I            
evaded the question by general answers, that I had satisfied the            
Emperor and court in all particulars. However, a malicious rogue of         
a skipper went to an officer, and pointing to me, told him I had not        
yet trampled on the crucifix: but the other, who had received               
instructions to let me pass, gave the rascal twenty strokes on the          
shoulders with a bamboo, after which I was no more troubled with            
such questions.                                                             
                                                    {P_3|CH_11 ^paragraph 5}
  Nothing happened worth mentioning in this voyage. We sailed with a        
fair wind to the Cape of Good Hope, where we stayed only to take in         
fresh water. On the 10th of April we arrived safe at Amsterdam, having      
lost only three men by sickness in the voyage, and a fourth who fell        
from the foremast into the sea, not far from the coast of Guinea. From      
Amsterdam I soon after set sail for England in a small vessel               
belonging to that city.                                                     
  On the 16th of April, 1710, we put in at the Downs. I landed the          
next morning, and saw once more my native country after an absence          
of five years and six months complete. I went straight to Redriff,          
where I arrived the same day at two in the afternoon, and found my          
wife and family in good health.                                             
-                                                                           
               THE END OF THE THIRD PART                                    
                                                                            
                                                                            
                                                                            
                                                                            
                                                                            
                                                                            
                                                                            
                                    PART IV                                 
                                                                            
                           A VOYAGE TO THE HOUYHNHNMS                       
                                                                            
                                                                            
                                  (SEE PLATE 6)                             
                                                                            
P_4|CH_1                                                                    
  CHAPTER I                                                                 
-                                                                           
  I continued at home with my wife and children about five months in a      
very happy condition, if I could have learned the lesson of knowing         
when I was well. I left my poor wife big with child, and accepted an        
advantageous offer made me to be Captain of the Adventure, a stout          
merchantman of 350 tons: for I understood navigation well, and being        
grown weary of a surgeon's employment at sea, which however I could         
exercise upon occasion, I took a skillful young man of that calling,        
one Robert Purefoy, into my ship. We set sail from Portsmouth upon the      
seventh day of August, 1710; on the fourteenth we met with Captain          
Pocock of Bristol, at Teneriffe, who was going to the bay of Campechy,      
to cut logwood. On the sixteenth he was parted from us by a storm; I        
heard since my return that his ship foundered, and none escaped but         
one cabin boy. He was an honest man, and a good sailor, but a little        
too positive in his own opinions, which was the cause of his                
destruction, as it has been of several others. For if he had                
followed my advice, he might have been safe at home with his family at      
this time, as well as myself.                                               
  I had several men die in my ship of calentures, so that I was forced      
to get recruits out of Barbadoes, and the Leeward Islands, where I          
touched by the direction of the merchants who employed me, which I had      
soon too much cause to repent: for I found afterwards that most of          
them had been buccaneers. I had fifty hands on board, and my orders         
were that I should trade with the Indians in the South Sea, and make        
what discoveries I could. These rogues whom I had picked up                 
debauched my other men, and they all formed a conspiracy to seize           
the ship and secure me; which they did one morning, rushing into my         
cabin, and binding me hand and foot, threatening to throw me                
overboard, if I offered to stir. I told them I was their prisoner           
and would submit. This they made me swear to do, and then they unbound      
me, only fastening one of my legs with a chain near my bed, and placed      
a sentry at my door with his piece charged, who was commanded to shoot      
me dead, if I attempted my liberty. They sent me down victuals and          
drink, and took the government of the ship to themselves. Their design      
was to turn pirates, and plunder the Spaniards, which they could not        
do, till they got more men. But first they resolved to sell the             
goods in the ship, and then go to Madagascar for recruits, several          
among them having died since my confinement. They sailed many weeks,        
and traded with the Indians, but I knew not what course they took,          
being kept a close prisoner in my cabin, and expecting nothing less         
than to be murdered, as they often threatened me.                           
  Upon the ninth day of May, 1711, one James Welch came down to my          
cabin; and said he had orders from the Captain to set me ashore. I          
expostulated with him but in vain; neither would he so much as tell me      
who their new Captain was. They forced me into the longboat, letting        
me put on my best suit of clothes, which were as good as new, and a         
small bundle of linen, but no arms except my hanger; and they were          
so civil as not to search my pockets, into which I conveyed what money      
I had, with some other little necessaries. They rowed about a               
league, and then set me down on a strand. I desired them to tell me         
what country it was. They all swore they knew no more than myself, but      
said that the Captain (as they called him) was resolved, after they         
had sold the lading, to get rid of me in the first place where they         
could discover land. They pushed off immediately, advising me to            
make haste, for fear of being overtaken by the tide, and so bade me         
farewell.                                                                   
  In this desolate condition I advanced forward, and soon got upon          
ground, where I sat down on a bank to rest myself, and consider what I      
had best do. When I was a little refreshed I went up into the country,      
resolving to deliver myself to the first savages I should meet, and         
purchase my life from them by some bracelets, glass rings, and other        
toys which sailors usually provide themselves with in those voyages,        
and whereof I had some about me. The land was divided by long rows          
of trees, not regularly planted, but naturally growing; there was           
plenty of grass, and several fields of oats. I walked very                  
circumspectly for fear of being surprised, or suddenly shot with an         
arrow from behind or on either side. I fell into a beaten road,             
where I saw many tracks of human feet, and some of cows, but most of        
horses. At last I beheld several animals in a field, and one or two of      
the same kind sitting in trees. Their shape was very singular and           
deformed, which a little discomposed me, so that I lay down behind a        
thicket to observe them better. Some of them coming forward near the        
place where I lay, gave me an opportunity of distinctly marking             
their form. Their heads and breasts were covered with a thick hair,         
some frizzled and others lank; they had beards like goats, and a            
long ridge of hair down their backs and the foreparts of their legs         
and feet, but the rest of their bodies were bare, so that I might           
see their skins, which were of a brown buff color. They had no              
tails, nor any hair at all on their buttocks, except about the anus;        
which, I presume, nature had placed there to defend them as they sat        
on the ground; for this posture they used, as well as lying down and        
often stood on their hind feet. They climbed high trees, as nimbly          
as a squirrel, for they had strong extended claws before and behind,        
terminating in sharp points, and hooked. They would often spring and        
bound and leap with prodigious agility. The females were not so             
large as the males; they had long lank hair on their heads, but none        
on their faces, nor anything more than a sort of down on the rest of        
their bodies, except about the anus, and pudenda. Their dugs hung           
between their forefeet, and often reached almost to the ground as they      
walked. The hair of both sexes was of several colors, brown, red,           
black, and yellow. Upon the whole, I never beheld in all my travels so      
disagreeable an animal, nor one against which I naturally conceived so      
strong an antipathy. So that thinking I had seen enough, full of            
contempt and aversion, I got up and pursued the beaten road, hoping it      
might direct me to the cabin of some Indian. I had not got far when         
I met one of these creatures full in my way, and coming up directly to      
me. The ugly monster, when he saw me, distorted several ways every          
feature of his visage, and stared as at an object he had never seen         
before; then approaching nearer, lifted up his forepaw, whether out of      
curiosity or mischief, I could not tell. But I drew my hanger, and          
gave him a good blow with the flat side of it, for I dare not strike        
him with the edge, fearing the inhabitants might be provoked against        
me, if they should come to know that I had killed or maimed any of          
their cattle. When the beast felt the smart, he drew back, and              
roared so loud that a herd of at least forty came flocking about me         
from the next field, howling and making odious faces; but I ran to the      
body of a tree, and leaning my back against it, kept them off by            
waving my hanger. Several of this cursed brood getting hold of the          
branches behind, leaped up into the tree, from where they began to          
discharge their excrements on my head; however, I escaped pretty well,      
by sticking close to the stem of the tree, but was almost stifled with      
the filth, which fell about me on every side.                               
  In the midst of this distress, I observed them all to run away of         
a sudden as fast as they could, at which I ventured to leave the tree,      
and pursue the road, wondering what it was that could put them into         
this fright. But looking on my left hand, I saw a horse walking softly      
in the field; which my persecutors having sooner discovered, was the        
cause of their flight. The horse started a little when he came near         
me, but soon recovering himself, looked full in my face with                
manifest tokens of wonder; he viewed my hands and feet, walking             
round me several times. I would have pursued my journey, but he placed      
himself directly in the way, yet looking with a very mild aspect,           
never offering the least violence. We stood gazing at each other for        
some time; at last I took the boldness to reach my hand towards his         
neck, with a design to stroke it, using the common style and whistle        
of jockeys when they are going to handle a strange horse. But this          
animal seeming to receive my civilities with disdain, shook his             
head, and bent his brows, softly raising up his right forefoot to           
remove my hand. Then he neighed three or four times, but in so              
different a cadence, that I almost began to think he was speaking to        
himself in some language of his own.                                        
                                                     {P_4|CH_1 ^paragraph 5}
  While he and I were thus employed, another horse came up; who             
applying himself to the first in a very formal manner, they gently          
struck each other's right hoof before, neighing several times by            
turns, and varying the sound, which seemed to be almost articulate.         
They went some paces off, as if it were to confer together, walking         
side by side, backward and forward, like persons deliberating upon          
some affair of weight, but often turning their eyes towards me, as          
it were to watch that I might not escape. I was amazed to see such          
actions and behavior in brute beasts, and concluded with myself,            
that if the inhabitants of this country were endued with a                  
proportionable degree of reason, they must needs be the wisest              
people upon earth. This thought gave me so much comfort, that I             
resolved to go forward until I could discover some house or village,        
or meet with any of the natives, leaving the two horses to discourse        
together as they pleased. But the first, who was a dapple gray,             
observing me to steal off, neighed after me in so expressive a tone,        
that I fancied myself to understand what he meant; whereupon I              
turned back, and came near him, to expect his farther commands, but         
concealing my fear as much as I could, for I began to be in some pain,      
how this adventure might terminate; and the reader will easily believe      
I did not much like my present situation.                                   
  The two horses came up close to me, looking with great earnestness        
upon my face and hands. The gray steed rubbed my hat all round with         
his right forehoof, and discomposed it so much that I was forced to         
adjust it better, by taking it off, and settling it again; whereat          
both he and his companion (who was a brown bay) appeared to be much         
surprised; the latter felt the lappet of my coat, and finding it to         
hang loose about me, they both looked with new signs of wonder. He          
stroked my right hand, seeming to admire the softness and color; but        
he squeezed it so hard between his hoof and his pastern, that I was         
forced to roar; after which they both touched me with all possible          
tenderness. They were under great perplexity about my shoes and             
stockings, which they felt very often, neighing to each other, and          
using various gestures, not unlike those of a philosopher, when he          
would attempt to solve some new and difficult phenomenon.                   
  Upon the whole, the behavior of these animals was so orderly and          
rational, so acute and judicious, that I at last concluded they must        
needs be magicians, who had thus metamorphosed themselves upon some         
design, and seeing a stranger the way, were resolved to divert              
themselves with him; or perhaps were really amazed at the sight of a        
man so very different in habit, feature, and complexion from those who      
might probably live so remote a climate. Upon the strength of this          
reasoning, I ventured to address them in the following manner:              
Gentlemen, if you be conjurers, as I have good cause to believe, you        
can understand any language; therefore I make bold to let your              
worships know that I am a poor distressed Englishman, driven by his         
misfortunes upon your coast, and I entreat one of you, to let me            
ride upon his back, as if he were a real horse, to some house or            
village where I can be relieved. In return of which favor I will            
make you a present of this knife and bracelet (taking them out of my        
pocket). The two creatures stood silent while I spoke, seeming to           
listen with great attention; and when I had ended, they neighed             
frequently towards each other, as if they were engaged in serious           
conversation. I plainly observed, that their language expressed the         
passions very well, and the words might with little pains be                
resolved into an alphabet more easily than the Chinese.                     
  I could frequently distinguish the word Yahoo, which was repeated by      
each of them several times; and although it was impossible for me to        
conjecture what it meant, yet while the two horses were busy in             
conversation, I endeavored to practice this word upon my tongue; and        
as soon as they were silent, I boldly pronounced Yahoo in a loud            
voice, imitating, at the same time, as near as I could, the neighing        
of a horse; at which they were both visibly surprised, and the gray         
repeated the same word twice, as if he meant to teach me the right          
accent, wherein I spoke after him as well as I could, and found myself      
perceivably to improve every time, though very far from any degree          
of perfection. Then the bay tried me with a second word, much harder        
to be pronounced; but reducing it to the English orthography, may be        
spelt thus, Houyhnhnm. I did not succeed in this so well as the             
former, but after two or three farther trials, I had better fortune;        
and they both appeared amazed at my capacity.                               
  After some further discourse, which I then conjectured might              
relate to me, the two friends took their leave, with the same               
compliment of striking each other's hoof; and the gray made me signs        
that I should walk before him, wherein I thought it prudent to comply,      
till I could find a better director. When I offered to slacken my           
pace, he would cry Hhuun, Hhuun; I guessed his meaning, and gave him        
to understand as well as I could, that I was weary, and not able to         
walk faster; upon which he would stand a while to let me rest.              
                                                                            
P_4|CH_2                                                                    
  CHAPTER II                                                                
-                                                                           
  Having traveled about three miles, we came to a long kind of              
building, made of timber stuck in the ground, and wattled across;           
the roof was low, and covered with straw. I now began to be a little        
comforted, and took out some toys, which travelers usually carry for        
presents to the savage Indians of America and other parts, in hopes         
the people of the house would be thereby encouraged to receive me           
kindly. The horse made me a sign to go in first; it was a large room        
with a smooth clay floor, and a rack and manger extending the whole         
length on one side. There were three nags, and two mares, not               
eating, but some of them sitting down upon their hams, which I very         
much wondered at; but wondered more to see the rest employed in             
domestic business. These seemed but ordinary cattle; however, this          
confirmed my first opinion, that a people who could so far civilize         
brute animals, must needs excel in wisdom all the nations of the            
world. The gray came in just after, and thereby prevented any ill           
treatment which the others might have given me. He neighed to them          
several times in a style of authority, and received answers.                
  Beyond this room there were three others, reaching the length of the      
house, to which you passed through three doors, opposite to each            
other, in the manner of a vista; we went through the second room            
towards the third; here the gray walked in first, beckoning me to           
attend: I waited in the second room, and got ready my presents for the      
master and mistress of the house: they were two knives, three               
bracelets of pearl, a small looking glass, and a bead necklace. The         
horse neighed three or four times, and I waited to hear some answers        
in a human voice, but I heard no other returns than in the same             
dialect, only one or two a little shriller than his. I began to             
think that this house must belong to some person of great note among        
them, because there appeared so much ceremony before I could gain           
admittance. But, that a man of quality should be served all by horses,      
was beyond my comprehension. I feared my brain was disturbed by my          
sufferings and misfortunes: I roused myself, and looked about me in         
the room where I was left alone; this was furnished like the first,         
only after a more elegant manner. I rubbed my eyes often, but the same      
objects still occurred. I pinched my arms and sides to awake myself,        
hoping I might be in a dream. then absolutely concluded, that all           
these appearances could be nothing else but necromancy and magic.           
But I had no time to pursue these reflections; for the gray horse came      
to the door, and made me a sign to follow him into the third room,          
where I saw a very comely mare, together with a colt and foal, sitting      
on their haunches, upon mats of straw, not unartfuUy made, and              
perfectly neat and clean.                                                   
  The mare soon after my entrance, rose from her mat, and coming up         
close, after having nicely observed my hands and face, gave me a            
most contemptuous look; then turning to the horse, I heard the word         
Yahoo often repeated betwixt them; the meaning of which word I could        
not then comprehend, although it were the first I had learned to            
pronounce; but I was soon better informed, to my everlasting                
mortification: for the horse beckoning to me with his head, and             
repeating the word Hhuun, Hhuun, as he did upon the road, which I           
understood was to attend him, led me out into a kind of court, where        
was another building at some distance from the house. Here we entered,      
and I saw three of these detestable creatures, whom I first met             
after my landing, feeding upon roots, and the flesh of some animals,        
which I afterwards found to be that of asses and dogs, and now and          
then a cow dead by accident or discase. were all tied by the neck with      
strong withes, fastened to a beam; they held their food between the         
claws of their forefeet, and tore it with their teeth.                      
  The master horse ordered a sorrel nag, one of his servants, to untie      
the largest of these animals, and take him into the yard. The beast         
and I were brought close together, and our countenances diligently          
compared, both by master and servant, who thereupon repeated several        
times the word Yahoo. My horror and astonishment are not to be              
described, when I observed in this abominable animal a perfect human        
figure: the face of it indeed was flat and broad, the nose                  
depressed, the lips large, and the mouth wide. But these differences        
are common to all savage nations, where the lineaments of the               
countenance are distorted by the natives suffering their infants to         
lie groveling on the earth, or by carrying them on their backs,             
nuzzling with their face against the mother's shoulders. The fore feet      
of the Yahoo differed from my hands in nothing else but the length          
of the nails, the coarseness and brownness of the palms, and the            
hairiness on the backs. There was the same resemblance between our          
feet, with the same differences, which I knew very well, though the         
horses did not, because of my shoes and stockings; the same in every        
part of our bodies, except as to hairiness and color, which I have          
already described.                                                          
  The great difficulty that seemed to stick with the two horses, was        
to see the rest of my body so very different from that of a Yahoo, for      
which I was obliged to my clothes whereof they had no conception.           
The sorrel nag offered me a root, which he held (after their manner,        
as we shall describe in its proper place) between his hoof and              
pastern; I took it in my hand, and having smelt it, returned it to him      
again as civilly as I could. He brought out of the Yahoo's kennel a         
piece of ass's flesh, but it smelt so offensively that I turned from        
it with loathing: he then threw it to the Yahoo, by whom it was             
greedily devoured. He afterwards showed me a wisp of hay, and a             
fetlock full of oats; but I shook my head, to signify that neither          
of these were food for me. And indeed, I now apprehended that I must        
absolutely starve, if I did not get to some of my own species; for          
as to those filthy Yahoos, although there were few greater lovers of        
mankind, at that time, than myself, yet I confess I never saw any           
sensitive being so detestable on all accounts; and the more I came          
near them, the more hateful they grew, while I stayed in that country.      
This the master horse observed by my behavior, and therefore sent           
the Yahoo back to his kennel. He then put his fore hoof to his              
mouth, at which I was much surprised, although he did it with ease,         
and with a motion that appeared perfectly natural, and made other           
signs to know what I would eat; but I could not return him such an          
answer as he was able to apprehend; and if he had understood me, I did      
not see how it was possible to contrive any way for finding myself          
nourishment. While we were thus engaged, I observed a cow passing           
by, whereupon I pointed to her, and expressed a desire to let me go         
and milk her. This had its effect; for he led me back into the              
house, and ordered a mareservant to open a room, where a good store of      
milk lay in earthen and wooden vessels, after a very orderly and            
cleanly manner. She gave me a large bowl full, of which I drank very        
heartily, and found myself well refreshed.                                  
                                                     {P_4|CH_2 ^paragraph 5}
  About noon I saw coming towards the house a kind of vehicle, drawn        
like a sledge by four Yahoos. There was in it an old steed, who seemed      
to be of quality; he alighted with his hind feet forward, having by         
accident got a hurt in his left fore foot. He came to dine with our         
horse, who received him with great civility. They dined in the best         
room, and had oats boiled in milk for the second course, which the old      
horse ate warm, but the rest cold. Their mangers were placed                
circular in the middle of the room, and divided into several                
partitions, round which they sat on their haunches upon bosses of           
straw. In the middle was a large rack with angles answering to every        
partition of the manger; so that each horse and mare ate their own          
hay, and their own mash of oats and milk, with much decency and             
regularity. The behavior of the young colt and foal appeared very           
modest, and that of the master and mistress extremely cheerful and          
complaisant to their guest. The gray ordered me to stand by him, and        
much discourse passed between him and his friend concerning me, as I        
found by the stranger's often looking on me, and the frequent               
repetition of the word Yahoo.                                               
  I happened to wear my gloves, which the master gray observing,            
seemed perplexed, discovering signs of wonder what I had done to my         
fore feet; he put his hoof three or four times to them, as if he would      
signify that I should reduce them to their former shape, which I            
presently did, pulling off both my gloves, and putting them into my         
pocket. This occasioned farther talk, and I saw the company was             
pleased with my behavior, whereof I soon found the good effects. I was      
ordered to speak the few words I understood, and while they were at         
dinner the master taught the names for oats, milk, fire, water, and         
some others; which I could readily pronounce after him, having from my      
youth a great facility in learning languages.                               
  When dinner was done the master horse took me aside, and by signs         
and words made me understand the concern that he was in, that I had         
nothing to eat. Oats in their tongue are called hlunnh. This word I         
pronounced two or three times; for although I had refused them at           
first, yet upon second thoughts I considered that I could contrive          
to make of them a kind of bread, which might be sufficient with milk        
to keep me alive, till I could make my escape to some other country         
and to creatures of my own species. The horse immediately ordered a         
white mare-servant of his family to bring me a good quantity of oats        
in a sort of wooden tray. These I heated before the fire as well as         
I could, and rubbed them till the husks came off, which I made a shift      
to winnow from the grain; I ground and beat them between two stones,        
then took water, and made them into a paste or cake, which I toasted        
at the fire, and ate warm with milk. It was at first a very insipid         
diet, though common enough in many parts of Europe, but grew tolerable      
by time; and having been often reduced to hard fare in my life, this        
was not the first experiment I had made how easily nature is                
satisfied. And I cannot but observe, that I never had one hour's            
sickness while I stayed in this island. 'Tis true, I sometimes made         
a shift to catch a rabbit or bird by springes made of Yahoos' hairs,        
and I often gathered wholesome herbs, which I boiled, or ate as salads      
with my bread, and now and then, for a rarity, I made a little butter,      
and drank the whey. I was at first at a great loss for salt; but            
custom soon reconciled the want of it; and I am confident that the          
frequent use of salt among us is an effect of luxury, and was first         
introduced only as a provocative to drink; except where it is               
necessary for preserving of flesh in long voyages, or in places remote      
from great markets. For we observe no animal to be fond of it but man:      
and as to myself, when I left this country, it was a great while            
before I could endure the taste of it in anything that I ate.               
  This is enough to say upon the subject of my diet, wherewith other        
travelers fill their books, as if the readers were personally               
concerned whether we fared well or ill. However, it necessary to            
mention this matter, lest the world should think it impossible that         
I could find sustenance for three years in such a country, and among        
such inhabitants.                                                           
  When it grew towards evening, the master horse ordered a place for        
me to lodge in; it was but six yards from the house, and separated          
from the stable of the Yahoos. Here I got some straw, and covering          
myself with my own clothes, slept very sound. But I was in a short          
time better accommodated, as the reader shall know hereafter, when I        
come to treat more particularly about my way of living.                     
                                                                            
P_4|CH_3                                                                    
  CHAPTER III                                                               
-                                                                           
  My principal endeavor was to learn the language, which my master          
(for so I shall henceforth call him) and his children, and every            
servant of his house, were desirous to teach me. For they looked            
upon it as a prodigy that a brute animal should discover such marks of      
a rational creature. I pointed to every thing and inquired the name of      
it, which I wrote down in my journal book when I was alone, and             
corrected my bad accent by desiring those of the family to pronounce        
it often. In this employment, a sorrel nag, one of the under servants,      
was ready to assist me.                                                     
  In speaking they pronounce through the nose and throat, and their         
language approaches nearest to the High Dutch or German of any I            
know in Europe; but is much more graceful and significant. The Emperor      
Charles made almost the same observation, when he said that if he were      
to speak to his horse it should be in High Dutch.                           
  The curiosity and impatience of my master were so great, that he          
spent many hours of his leisure to instruct me. He was convinced (as        
he afterwards told me) that I must be a Yahoo, but my teachableness,        
civility, and cleanliness, astonished him; which were qualities             
altogether so opposite to those animals. He was most perplexed about        
my clothes, reasoning sometimes with himself whether they were a            
part of my body; for I never pulled them off till the family were           
asleep, and got them on before they waked in the morning. My master         
was eager to learn from where I came, how I acquired those appearances      
of reason which I discovered in all my actions, and to know my story        
from my own mouth, which he hoped he should soon do by the great            
proficiency I made in learning and pronouncing their words and              
sentences. To help my memory, I formed all I learned into the               
English alphabet, and wrote the words down with the translations. Ibis      
last after some time I ventured to do in my master's presence. It cost      
me much trouble to explain to him what I was doing; for the                 
inhabitants have not the least idea of books or literature.                 
  In about ten weeks time I was able to understand most of his              
questions, and in three months could give him some tolerable                
answers. He was extremely curious to know from what part of the             
country I came, and how I was taught to imitate a rational creature;        
because the Yahoos (whom he saw I exactly resembled in my head, hands,      
and face, that were only visible), with some appearance of cunning,         
and the strongest disposition to mischief, were observed to be the          
most unteachable of all brutes. I answered that I came over the sea         
from a far place, with many others of my own kind, in a great hollow        
vessel made of the bodies of trees. That my companions forced me to         
land on this coast, and then left me to shift for myself. It was            
with some difficulty, and by the help of many signs, that I brought         
him to understand me. He replied, that I must needs be mistaken, or         
that I said the thing which was not. (For they have no word in their        
language to express lying or falsehood.) He knew it was impossible          
that there could be a country beyond the sea, or that a parcel of           
brutes could move a wooden vessel whither they pleased upon water.          
He was sure no Houyhnhnm alive could make such a vessel, nor would          
trust Yahoos to manage it.                                                  
  The word Houyhnhnm, in their tongue, signifies a horse, and in its        
etymology, the perfection of nature. I told my master, that I was at a      
loss for expression, but would improve as fast as I could; and hoped        
in a short time I should be able to tell him wonders: he was pleased        
to direct his own mare, his colt and foal, and the servants of the          
family, to take all opportunities of instructing me, and every day for      
two or three hours he was at the same pains himself. Several horses         
and mares of quality in the neighborhood came often to our house            
upon the report spread of a wonderful Yahoo, that could speak like a        
Houyhnhnm, and seemed in his words and actions to discover some             
glimmerings of reason. These delighted to converse with me: they put        
many questions, and received such answers as I was able to return.          
By all these advantages I made so great a progress that in five months      
from my arrival I understood whatever was spoke, and could express          
myself tolerably well.                                                      
                                                     {P_4|CH_3 ^paragraph 5}
  The Houyhnhnms who came to visit my master with the design of seeing      
and talking with me, could hardly believe me to be a right Yahoo,           
because my body had a different covering from others of my kind.            
They were astonished to observe me without the usual hair or skin,          
except on my head, face, and hands; but I discovered that secret to my      
master, upon an accident which happened about a fortnight before.           
  I have already told the reader, that every night when the family          
were gone to bed it was my custom to strip and cover myself with my         
clothes. It happened one morning early, that my master sent for me          
by the sorrel nag, who was his valet; when he came I was fast               
asleep, my clothes fallen off on one side, and my shirt above my            
waist. I awakened at the noise he made, and observed him to deliver         
his message in some disorder; after which he went to my master, and in      
a great fright gave him a very confused account of what he had seen.        
This I presently discovered; for going as soon as I was dressed to pay      
my attendance upon his Honor, he asked me the meaning of what his           
servant had reported, that I was not the same thing when I slept as         
I appeared to be at other times; that his valet assured him, some part      
of me was white, some yellow, at least not so white, and some brown.        
  I had hitherto concealed the secret of my dress, in order to              
distinguish myself as much as possible from that cursed race of             
Yahoos; but now I found it in vain to do so any longer. Besides, I          
considered that my clothes and shoes would soon wear out, which             
already were in a declining condition, and must be supplied by some         
contrivance from the hides of Yahoos or other brutes; whereby the           
whole secret would be known. I therefore told my master that in the         
country from which I came those of my kind always covered their bodies      
with the hairs of certain animals prepared by art, as well for decency      
as to avoid the inclemencies of air, both hot and cold; of which, as        
to my own person, I would give him immediate conviction, if he pleased      
to command me; only desiring his excuse, if I did not expose those          
parts that nature taught us to conceal. He said my discourse was all        
very strange, but especially the last part; for he could not                
understand why nature should teach us to conceal what nature had            
given. That neither himself nor family were ashamed of any parts of         
their bodies; but however I might do as I pleased. Whereupon I first        
unbuttoned my coat and pulled it off. I did the same with my                
waistcoat; I drew off my shoes, stockings, and breeches. I let my           
shirt down to my waist, and drew up the bottom, fastening it like a         
girdle about my middle to hide my nakedness.                                
  My master observed the whole performance with great signs of              
curiosity and admiration. He took up all my clothes in his pastern,         
one piece after another, and examined them diligently; he then stroked      
my body very gently and looked round me several times, after which          
he said it was plain I must be a perfect Yahoo; but that I differed         
very much from the rest of my species, in the softness and whiteness        
and smoothness of my skin, my want of hair in several parts of my           
body, the shape and shortness of my claws behind and before, and my         
affectation of walking continually on my two hind feet. He desired          
to see no more, and gave me leave to put on my clothes again, for I         
was shuddering with cold.                                                   
  I expressed my uneasiness at his giving me so often the                   
appellation of Yahoo, an odious animal for which I had so utter a           
hatred and contempt. I begged he would forbear applying that word to        
me, and take the same order in his family, and among his friends            
whom he suffered to see me. I requested likewise that the secret of my      
having a false covering to my body might be known to none but himself,      
at least as long as my present clothing should last; for as to what         
the sorrel nag his valet had observed, his Honor might command him          
to conceal it.                                                              
                                                    {P_4|CH_3 ^paragraph 10}
  All this my master very graciously consented to, and thus the secret      
was kept till my clothes began to wear out, which I was forced to           
supply by several contrivances that shall hereafter be mentioned. In        
the meantime he desired I would go on with my utmost diligence to           
learn their language, because he was more astonished at my capacity         
for speech and reason than at the figure of my body, whether it were        
covered or not; adding that he waited with some impatience to hear the      
wonders which I promised to tell him.                                       
  From thenceforward he doubled the pains he had been at to instruct        
me; he brought me into all company, and made them treat me with             
civility, because, as he told them privately, this would put me into        
good humor and make me more diverting.                                      
  Every day when I waited on him, beside the trouble he was at in           
teaching, he would ask me several questions concerning myself, which I      
answered as well as I could; and by these means he had already              
received some general ideas, though very imperfect. It would be             
tedious to relate the several steps by which I advanced to a more           
regular conversation: but the first account I gave of myself in any         
order and length, was to this purpose:                                      
  That I came from a very far country, as I already had attempted to        
tell him, with about fifty more of my own species; that we traveled         
upon the seas, in a great hollow vessel made of wood, and larger            
than his Honor's house. I described the ship to him in the best             
terms I could, and explained by the help of my handkerchief displayed,      
how it was driven forward by the wind. That upon a quarrel among us, I      
was set on shore on this coast, where I walked forward without knowing      
whither, till he delivered me from the persecution of those                 
execrable Yahoos. He asked me who made the ship, and how it was             
possible that the Houyhnhnms of my country would leave it to the            
management of brutes? My answer was that I dare proceed no further          
in my relation, unless he would give me his word and honor that he          
would not be offended, and then I would tell him the wonders I had          
so often promised. He agreed; and I went on by assuring him that the        
ship was made by creatures was myself, who in all the countries I           
had traveled, as well as in my own, were the only governing,                
rational animals; and that upon my arrival here I was as much               
astonished to see the Houyhnhnms act like rational beings, as he or         
his friends could be finding some marks of reason in a creature he was      
pleased to call a Yahoo, to which I owned my resemblance in every           
part, but could not account for their degenerate and brutal nature.         
I said farther that if good fortune ever restored me to my native           
country, to relate my travels here, as I resolved to do, everybody          
would believe that I said the thing which was not; that I invented the      
story out of my own head; and with all possible respect to himself,         
his family and friends, and under his promise of not being offended,        
our countrymen would hardly think it probable, that a Houyhnhnm should      
be the presiding creature of a nation, and a Yahoo the brute.               
                                                                            
P_4|CH_4                                                                    
  CHAPTER IV                                                                
-                                                                           
  My master heard me with great appearances of uneasiness in his            
countenance, because doubting, or not believing, are so little known        
in this country, that the inhabitants cannot tell how to behave             
themselves under such circumstances. And I remember in frequent             
discourses with my master concerning the nature of manhood in other         
parts of the world, having occasion to talk of lying and false              
representation, it was with much difficulty that he comprehended            
what I meant, although he had otherwise a most acute judgment. For          
he argued thus: that the use of speech was to make us understand one        
another, and to receive information of facts; now if anyone said the        
thing which was not, these ends were defeated; because I cannot             
properly be said to understand him; and I am so far from receiving          
information, that he leaves me worse than in ignorance, for I am led        
to believe a thing black when it is white, and short when it is             
long. And these were all the notions he had concerning that faculty of      
lying, so perfectly well understood among human creatures.                  
  To return from this digression; when I asserted that the Yahoos were      
the only governing animals in my country, which my master said was          
altogether past his conception, he desired to know whether we had           
Houyhnhnms among us, and what was their employment: I told him we           
had great numbers, that in summer they grazed in the fields, and in         
winter were kept in houses, with hay and oats, where Yahoo servants         
were employed to rub their skins smooth, comb their manes, pick             
their feet, serve them with food, and make their beds. I understand         
you well, said my master, it is now very plain, from all you have           
spoken, that whatever share of reason the Yahoos pretend to, the            
Houyhnhnms are your masters; I heartily wish our Yahoos would be so         
tractable. I begged his Honor would please to excuse me from                
proceeding any farther, because I was very certain that the account he      
expected from me would be highly displeasing. But he insisted in            
commanding me to let him know the best and the worst: I told him he         
should be obeyed. I owned that the Houyhnhnms among us, whom we called      
horses, were the most generous and comely animals we had, that they         
excelled in strength and swiftness; and when they belonged to               
persons of quality, employed in traveling, racing, or drawing               
chariots, they were treated with much kindness and till they fell into      
diseases or became foundered in the feet; and then they were sold, and      
used to all kind of drudgery till they died; after which their skins        
were stripped and sold for what they were worth, and their bodies left      
to be devoured by dogs and birds of prey. But the common race of            
horses had not so good fortune, being kept by farmers and carriers,         
and other mean people, who put them to great labor, and fed them            
worse. I described, as well as I could, our way of riding, the shape        
and use of a bridle, a saddle, a spur, and a whip, of harness and           
wheels. I added that we fastened plates of a certain hard substance         
called iron at the bottom of their feet, to preserve their hoofs            
from being broken by the stony ways on which we often traveled.             
  My master, after some expressions of great indignation, wondered how      
we dared to venture upon a Houyhnhnm's back, for he was sure that           
the weakest servant in his house would be able to shake off the             
strongest Yahoo, or by lying down and rolling on his back squeeze           
the brute to death. I answered that our horses were trained up from         
three or four years old to the several uses we intended them for; that      
if any of them proved intolerably vicious, they were employed for           
carriages; that they were severely beaten while they were young, for        
any mischievous tricks; that the males, designed for common use of          
riding or draught, were generally castrated about two years after           
their birth, to take down their spirits and make them more tame and         
gentle; that they were indeed sensible of rewards and punishments; but      
his Honor would please to consider, that they had not the least             
tincture of reason any more than the Yahoos in this country.                
  It put me to the pains of many circumlocutions to give my master a        
right idea of what I spoke; for their language does not abound in           
variety of words, because their wants and passions are fewer than           
among us. But it is impossible to represent his noble resentment at         
our savage treatment of the Houyhnhnm race, particularly after I had        
explained the manner and use of castrating horses among us, to              
hinder them from propagating their kind, and to render them more            
servile. He said if it were possible there could be any country             
where Yahoos alone were endued with reason, they certainly must be the      
governing animal, because reason will in time always prevail against        
brutal strength. But considering the frame of our bodies, and               
especially of mine, he thought no creature of equal bulk was so ill         
contrived, for employing that reason in the common offices of life;         
whereupon he desired to know whether those among whom I lived               
resembled me or the Yahoos of his country. I assured him, that I was        
as well shaped as most of my age; but the younger and the females were      
much more soft and tender, and the skins of the latter generally as         
white as milk. He said I differed indeed from other Yahoos, being much      
more cleanly, and not altogether so deformed, but in point of real          
advantage he thought I differed for the worse. That my nails were of        
no use either to my fore or hind feet; as to my fore feet, he could         
not properly call them by that name, for he never observed me to            
walk upon them; that they were too soft to bear the ground; that I          
generally went with them uncovered, neither was the covering I              
sometimes wore on them of the same shape or so strong as that on my         
feet behind. That I could not walk with any security, for if either of      
my hind feet slipped, I must inevitably fall. He then began to find         
fault with other parts of my body, the flatness of my face, the             
prominence of my nose, my eyes placed directly in front, so that I          
could not look on either side without turning my that I was not able        
to feed myself without lifting one of my fore feet to my mouth; and         
therefore nature had placed these joints to answer that necessity.          
He knew not what could be the use of those several clefts and               
divisions in my feet behind; that these were too soft to bear the           
hardness and sharpness of stones without a covering made from the skin      
of some other brute; that my whole body wanted a fence against heat         
cold, which I was forced to put on and off every day with                   
tediousness and trouble. And lastly that he observed every animal in        
this country naturally to abhor the Yahoos, whom the weaker avoided         
and the stronger drove from them. So that supposing us to have the          
gift of reason, he could not see how it were possible to cure that          
natural antipathy which every creature discovered against us; nor           
consequently, how we could tame and render them serviceable.                
However, he would (as he said) debate the matter no farther, because        
he was more desirous to know my own story, the country where I was          
born, and the several actions and events of my life before I came           
here.                                                                       
  I assured him how extremely desirous I was that he should be              
satisfied on every point; but I doubted much whether it would be            
possible for me to explain myself on several subjects whereof his           
Honor could have no conception, because I saw nothing in his country        
to which I could resemble them. That however I would do my best, and        
strive to express myself by similitudes, humbly desiring his                
assistance when I wanted proper words; which he was pleased to promise      
me.                                                                         
                                                     {P_4|CH_4 ^paragraph 5}
  I said my birth was of honest parents in an island called England,        
which was remote from this country, as many days' journey as the            
strongest of his Honor's servants could travel in the annual course of      
the sun. That I was bred a surgeon, whose trade it is to cure wounds        
and hurts in the body, got by accident or violence; that my country         
was governed by a female man, whom we called a Queen. That I left it        
to get riches, whereby I might maintain myself and family when I            
should return. That in my last voyage I was Commander of the ship, and      
had about fifty Yahoos under me, many of which died at sea, and I           
was forced to supply them by others picked out from several nations.        
That our ship was twice in danger of being sunk; the first time by a        
great storm, and the second, by striking against a rock. Here my            
master interposed, by asking me how I could persuade strangers out          
of different countries to venture with me, after the losses I had           
sustained, and the hazards I had run. I said they were fellows of           
desperate fortunes, forced to fly from the places of their birth, on        
account of their poverty or their crimes. Some were undone by               
lawsuits; others spent all they had in drinking, whoring, and gaming;       
others fled for treason; many for murder, theft, poisoning, robbery,        
perjury, forgery, coining false money, for committing rapes or              
sodomy, for flying from their colors, or deserting to the enemy, and        
most of them had broken prison; none of these dared return to their         
native countries for fear of being hanged, or of starving in a jail;        
and therefore were under the necessity of seeking a livelihood in           
other places.                                                               
  During this discourse my master was pleased to interrupt me               
several times; I had made use of many circumlocutions in describing to      
him the nature of the several crimes, for which most of our crew had        
been forced to fly their country. This labor took up several days'          
conversation before he was able to comprehend me. He was wholly at a        
loss to know what could be the use or necessity of practicing those         
vices. To clear up which I endeavored to give some ideas of the desire      
of power and riches, of the terrible effects of lust, intemperance,         
malice and envy. All this I was forced to define and describe by            
putting of cases, and making of suppositions. After which, like one         
whose imagination was struck with something never seen or heard of          
before, he would lift up his eyes with amazement and indignation.           
Power, government, war, law, punishment, and a thousand other things        
had no terms wherein that language could express them, which made           
the difficulty almost insuperable to give my master any conception          
of what I meant. But being of an excellent understanding, much              
improved by contemplation and converse, he at last arrived at a             
competent knowledge of what human nature in our parts of the world          
is capable to perform, and desired I would give him some particular         
account of that land which we call Europe, but especially of my own         
country.                                                                    
                                                                            
P_4|CH_5                                                                    
  CHAPTER V                                                                 
-                                                                           
  The reader may please to observe, that the following extract of many      
conversations I had with my master, contains a summary of the most          
material points which were discoursed at several times for above two        
years; his Honor often desiring fuller satisfaction as I farther            
improved in the Houyhnhnm tongue. I laid before him, as well as I           
could, the whole state of Europe; I discoursed of trade and                 
manufactures, of arts and sciences; and the answers I gave to all           
the questions he made, as they arose upon several subjects, were a          
fund of conversation not to be exhausted. But I shall here only set         
down the substance of what passed between us concerning my own              
country, reducing it into order as well as I can, without any regard        
to time or other circumstances, while I strictly adhere to truth. My        
only concern is that I shall hardly be able to do justice to my             
master's arguments and expressions, which must needs suffer by my want      
of capacity, as well as by a translation into our barbarous English.        
  In obedience therefore to his Honor's commands, I related to him the      
Revolution under the Prince of Orange; the long war with France             
entered into by the said prince, and renewed by his successor the           
present Queen, wherein the greatest powers of Christendom were              
engaged, and which still continued: I computed at his request that          
about a million of Yahoos might have been killed in the whole progress      
of it, and perhaps a hundred or more cities taken, and thrice as            
many ships burnt or sunk.                                                   
  He asked me what were the usual causes or motives that made one           
country go to war with another. I answered they were innumerable,           
but I should only mention a few of the chief. Sometimes the ambition        
of princes, who never think they have land or people enough to govern;      
sometimes the corruption of ministers, who engage their master in a         
war in order to stifle or divert the clamor of the subjects against         
their evil administration. Difference in opinions has cost many             
millions of lives: for instance, whether flesh be bread, or bread be        
flesh; whether the juice of a certain berry be blood or wine;               
whether whistling be vice or a virtue; whether it be better to kiss         
a post, or throw it into the fire; what is the best color for a             
coat, whether black, white, red, or gray; and whether it should be          
long or short, narrow or wide, dirty or clean; with many more. Neither      
are any wars so furious and bloody, or of so long continuance, as           
those occasioned by difference in opinion, especially if it be in           
things indifferent.                                                         
  Sometimes the quarrel between two princes is to which of them             
shall dispossess a third of his dominions, where neither of them            
pretend to any right. Sometimes one prince quarrels with another,           
for fear the other should quarrel with him. Sometimes a war is entered      
upon, because the enemy is too strong, and sometimes because he is too      
weak. Sometimes our neighbors want the things which we have, or have        
the things which we want; and we both fight, till they take ours or         
give us theirs. It is a very justifiable cause of a war to invade a         
country after the people have been wasted by famine, destroyed by           
pestilence, or embroiled by factions among themselves. It is                
justifiable to enter into war against our nearest ally, when one of         
his towns lies convenient for us, or a territory of land, that would        
render our dominions round and complete. If a prince sends forces into      
a nation where the people are poor and ignorant, he may lawfully put        
half of them to death, and make slaves of the rest, in order to             
civilize and reduce them from their barbarous way of living. It is a        
very kingly, honorable, and frequent practice, when one prince desires      
the assistance of another to secure him against an invasion, that           
the assistant, when he has driven out the invader, should seize on the      
dominions himself, and kill, imprison or banish the prince he came          
to relieve. Alliance by blood or marriage is a frequent cause of war        
between princes; and the nearer the kindred is, the greater is their        
disposition to quarrel: poor nations are hungry, and rich nations           
are proud; and pride and hunger will ever be at variance. For these         
reasons, the trade of a soldier is held the most honorable of all           
others; because a soldier is a Yahoo hired to kill in cold blood as         
many of his own species, who have never offended him, as possibly he        
can.                                                                        
  There is likewise a kind of beggarly princes in Europe, not able          
to make war by themselves, who hire out their troops to richer              
nations, for so much a day to each man; of which they keep                  
three-fourths to themselves, and it is the best part of their               
maintenance; such are those in Germany and other northern parts of          
Europe.                                                                     
                                                     {P_4|CH_5 ^paragraph 5}
  What you have told me (said my master) upon the subject of war, does      
indeed discover most admirably the effects of that reason you               
pretend to: however, it is happy that the shame is greater than the         
danger; and that nature has left you utterly uncapable of doing much        
mischief.                                                                   
  For your mouths lying flat with your faces, you can hardly bite each      
other to any purpose, unless by consent. Then as to the claws upon          
your feet before and behind, they are so short and tender, that one of      
our Yahoos would drive a dozen of yours before him. And therefore in        
recounting the numbers of those who have been killed in battle, I           
cannot but think that you have said the thing which is not.                 
  I could not forbear shaking my head and smiling a little at his           
ignorance. And being no stranger to the art of war, I gave him a            
description of cannons, culverins, muskets, carabines, pistols,             
bullets, powder, swords, bayonets, battles, sieges, retreats, attacks,      
undermines, countermines, bombardments, sea fights; ships sunk with         
a thousand men, twenty thousand killed on each side; dying groans,          
limbs flying in the air, smoke, noise, confusion, trampling to death        
under horses' feet; flight, pursuit, victory; fields strewed with           
carcases left for food to dogs, and wolves, and birds of prey;              
plundering, stripping, ravishing, burning, and destroying. And to           
set forth the valor of my own dear countrymen, I assured him that I         
had seen them blow up a hundred enemies at once in a siege, and as          
many in a ship, and beheld the dead bodies come down in pieces from         
the clouds, to the great diversion of the spectators.                       
  I was going on to more particulars, when my master commanded me           
silence. He said whoever understood the nature of Yahoos might              
easily believe it possible for so vile animals to be capable of             
every action I had named, if their strength and cunning squalled their      
malice. But as my discourse had increased his abhorrence of the             
whole species, so he found it gave him a disturbance in his mind, to        
which he was wholly a stranger before. He thought his ears being            
used to such abominable words, might by degrees admit them with less        
detestation. That although he hated the Yahoos of this country, yet he      
no more blamed them for their odious qualities, than he did a gnnayh        
(a bird of prey) for its cruelty, or a sharp stone for cutting his          
hoof. But when a creature pretending to reason could be capable of          
such enormities, he dreaded lest the corruption of that faculty             
might be worse than brutality itself. He seemed therefore confident,        
that instead of reason, we were only possessed of some quality              
fitted to increase our natural vices; as the reflection from a              
troubled stream returns the image of an ill-shapen body, not only           
larger, but more distorted.                                                 
  He added, that he had heard too much upon the subject of war, both        
in this and some former discourses. There was another point which a         
little perplexed him at present. I had informed him, that some of           
our crew left their country on account of being ruined by Law; that         
I had already explained the meaning of the word; but he was at a            
loss how it should come to pass, that the law which was intended for        
every man's preservation, should be any man's ruin. Therefore he            
desired to be further satisfied what I meant by law, and the                
dispensers thereof, according to the present practice in my own             
country; because he thought nature and reason were sufficient guides        
for a reasonable animal, as we pretended to be, in showing us what          
we ought to do, and what to avoid.                                          
                                                    {P_4|CH_5 ^paragraph 10}
  I assured his Honor that law was a science wherein I had not much         
conversed, further than by employing advocates, in vain, upon some          
injustices that had been done me: however, I would give him all the         
satisfaction I was able.                                                    
  I said there was a society of men among us, bred up from their youth      
in the art of proving by words multiplied for the purpose, that             
white is black, and black is white, according as they are paid. To          
this society all the rest of the people are slaves. For example, if my      
neighbor has a mind to my cow, he hires a lawyer to prove that he           
ought to have my cow from me. I must then hire another to defend my         
right, it being against all rules of law that any man should be             
allowed to speak for himself. Now in this case I who am the right           
owner lie under two great disadvantages. First, my lawyer, being            
practiced almost from his cradle in defending falsehood, is quite           
out of his element when he would be an advocate for justice, which          
as an office unnatural, he always attempts with great awkwardness if        
not with ill-will. The second disadvantage is that my lawyer must           
proceed with great caution, or else he will be reprimanded by the           
judges, and abhorred by his brethren, as one that would lessen the          
practice of the law. And therefore I have but two methods to                
preserve my cow. The first is to gain over my adversary's lawyer            
with a double fee, who will then betray his client by insinuating that      
he has justice on his side. The second way is for my lawyer to make my      
cause appear as unjust as he can by the cow to belong to my adversary:      
and this, if it be skillfully done will certainly bespeak the favor of      
the bench.                                                                  
  Now, your Honour is to know that these judges an appointed to decide      
all controversies of property, as well as for the trial of                  
criminals, and picked out from the most dexterous lawyers, who are          
grown old or lazy, and having been biassed all their lives against          
truth and equity, are under such a fatal necessity of favoring              
fraud, perjury, and oppression, that I have known several of them           
refuse a large bribe from the side where justice lay, rather than           
injure the faculty, by doing any thing unbecoming their nature or           
their office.                                                               
  It is a maxim among these lawyers, that whatever has been done            
before may legally be done again: and therefore they take special care      
to record all the decisions formerly made against common justice and        
the general reason of mankind. These, under the name of precedents,         
they produce as authorities, to justify the most iniquitous                 
opinions; and the judges never fail of directing accordingly.               
  In pleading they studiously avoid entering into the merits of the         
cause, but are loud, violent, and tedious in dwelling upon all              
circumstances which are not to the purpose. For instance, in the            
case already mentioned, they never desire to know what claim or             
title my adversary has to my cow; but whether the said cow were red or      
black, her horns long or short, whether the field I graze her in be         
round or square, whether she was milked at home or abroad, what             
diseases she is subject to, and the like; after which they consult          
precedents, adjourn the cause from time to time, and in ten, twenty,        
or thirty years, come to an issue.                                          
                                                    {P_4|CH_5 ^paragraph 15}
  It is likewise to be observed, that this society has a peculiar cant      
and jargon of their own, that no other mortal can understand, and           
wherein all their laws are written, which they take special care to         
multiply; whereby they have wholly confounded the very essence of           
truth and falsehood, of right and wrong; so that it will take thirty        
years to decide whether the field left me by my ancestors for six           
generations belongs to me, or to a stranger three hundred miles off.        
  In the trial of persons accused for crimes against the state the          
method is much more short and commendable: the judge first sends to         
sound the disposition of those in power, after which he can easily          
hang or save the criminal, strictly preserving all due forms of law.        
  Here my master interposing, said it was a pity that creatures             
endowed with such prodigious abilities of mind as these lawyers, by         
the description I gave of them, must certainly be, were not rather          
encouraged to be instructors of others in wisdom and knowledge. In          
answer to which I assured his Honor that in all points out of their         
own trade, they were usually the most ignorant and stupid generation        
among us, the most despicable in common conversation, avowed enemies        
to all knowledge and learning, and equally to pervert the general           
reason of mankind in every other subject of discourse, as in that of        
their own profession.                                                       
                                                                            
P_4|CH_6                                                                    
  CHAPTER VI                                                                
-                                                                           
  My master was yet wholly at a loss to understand what motives             
could incite this race of lawyers to perplex, disquiet, and weary           
themselves, and engage in a confederacy of injustice, merely for the        
sake of injuring their fellow animals; neither could he comprehend          
what I meant in saying they did it for hire. Whereupon I was at much        
pains to describe to him the use of money, the materials it was made        
of, and the value of the metals; that when a Yahoo had got a great          
store of this precious substance, he was able to purchase whatever          
he had a mind to; the finest clothing, the noblest houses, great            
tracts of land, the most costly meats and drinks, and have his              
choice of the most beautiful females. Therefore since money alone           
was able to perform all these feats, our Yahoos thought they could          
never have enough of it to spend or save, as they found themselves          
inclined from their natural bent either to profusion or avarice.            
That the rich man enjoyed the fruit of the poor man's labor, and the        
latter were a thousand to one in proportion to the former. That the         
bulk of our people were forced to live miserably, by laboring every         
day for small wages to make a few live plentifully. I enlarged              
myself much on these and many other particulars to the same purpose;        
but his Honor was still to seek; for he went upon a supposition that        
all animals had a title to their share in the productions of the            
earth, and especially those who presided over the rest. Therefore he        
desired I would let him know what these costly meats were, and how any      
of us happened to want them. Whereupon I enumerated as many sorts as        
came into my head, with the various methods of dressing them, which         
could not be done without sending vessels by sea to every part of           
the world, as well for liquors to drink, as for sauces, and                 
innumerable other conveniences. I assured him that this whole globe of      
earth must be at least three times gone round, before one of our            
better female Yahoos could get her breakfast or a cup to put it in. He      
said that must needs be a miserable country which cannot furnish            
food for its own inhabitants. But what he chiefly wondered at, was how      
such vast tracts of ground as I described should be wholly without          
fresh water, and the people put to the necessity of sending over the        
sea for drink. I replied that England (the dear place of my                 
nativity) was computed to produce three times the quantity of food,         
more than its inhabitants are able to consume, as well as liquors           
extracted from grain, or pressed out of the fruit of certain trees,         
which made excellent drink, and the same proportion in every other          
convenience of life. But, in order to feed the luxury and intemperance      
of the males, and the vanity of the females, we sent away the greatest      
part of our necessary things to other countries, from whence in return      
we brought the materials of diseases, folly, and vice, to spend             
among ourselves. Hence it follows of necessity that vast numbers of         
our people are compelled to seek their livelihood by begging, robbing,      
stealing, cheating, pimping, forswearing, flattering, suborning,            
forging, gaming, lying, fawning, hectoring, voting, scribbling,             
star-gazing, poisoning, whoring, canting, libeling, free thinking, and      
the like occupations: every one of which terms, I was at much pains to      
make him understand.                                                        
  That wine was not imported among us from foreign countries, to            
supply the want of water or other drinks, but because it was a sort of      
liquid which made us merry by putting us out of our senses, diverted        
all melancholy thoughts, begat wild extravagant imaginations in the         
brain, raised our hopes, and banished our fears, suspended every            
office of reason for a time, and deprived us of the use of our              
limbs, till we fell into a profound sleep; although it must be              
confessed, that we always awoke sick and dispirited and that the use        
of this liquor filled us with diseases, which made our lives                
uncomfortable and short.                                                    
  But beside all this, the bulk of our people supported themselves          
by furnishing the necessities or conveniences of life to the rich, and      
to each other. For instance, when I am at home and dressed as I             
ought to be, I carry on my body the workmanship of a hundred                
tradesmen; the building and furniture of my house employ as many more,      
and five times the number to adorn my wife.                                 
  I was going on to tell him of another sort of people, who get             
their livelihood by attending the sick, having upon some occasions          
informed his Honor that many of my crew had died of diseases. But here      
it was with the utmost difficulty that I brought him to apprehend what      
I meant. He could easily conceive that a Houyhnhnm grew weak and heavy      
a few days before his death, or by some accident might hurt a limb.         
But that nature, who works all things to perfection, should suffer any      
pains to breed in our bodies, he thought impossible, and desired to         
know the reason of so unaccountable an evil. I told him we fed on a         
thousand things which operated contrary to each other; that we ate          
when we were not hungry, and drank without the provocation of               
thirst; that we sat whole nights strong liquors without eating a            
bit, which disposed us to sloth, inflamed our bodies, and precipitated      
or prevented digestion. That prostitute female Yahoos acquired a            
certain malady, which bred rottenness in the bones of those who fell        
into their embraces; that this and many other diseases were propagated      
from father to son, so that great numbers come into the world with          
complicated maladies upon them; that it would be endless to give him a      
catalogue of all diseases incident to human bodies; for they could not      
be fewer than five or six hundred, spread over every limb and joint;        
in short, every part, external and intestine, having diseases               
appropriated to them. To remedy which there was a sort of people            
bred up among us, in the profession or pretense of curing the sick.         
And because I had some skill in the faculty, I would in gratitude to        
his Honor let him know the whole mystery and method by which they           
proceed.                                                                    
  Their fundamental is that all diseases arise from repletion, from         
which they conclude that a great evacuation of the body is                  
necessary, either through the natural passage or upwards at the mouth.      
Their next business is from herbs, minerals, gums, oils, shells,            
salts, juices, seaweed, excrements, barks of trees, serpents, toads,        
frogs, spiders, dead men's flesh and bone, birds, beasts and fishes,        
to form a composition for smell and taste the most abominable,              
nauseous and detestable they can possibly contrive, which the               
stomach immediately rejects with loathing; and this they call a vomit;      
or else from the same storehouse, with some other poisonous additions,      
they command us to take in at the orifice above or below (just as           
the physician then happens to be disposed) a medicine equally annoying      
and disgustful to the bowels; which relaxing the belly, drives down         
all before it, and this they call a purge or a cluster. For nature (as      
the physicians allege) having intended the superior anterior orifice        
only for the intromission of solids and liquids, and the inferior           
posterior for ejection, these artists ingeniously considering that          
in all diseases nature is forced out of her seat, therefore to replace      
her in it the body must be treated in a manner directly contrary, by        
interchanging the use of each orifice, forcing solids and liquids in        
at the anus, and making evacuations at the mouth.                           
                                                     {P_4|CH_6 ^paragraph 5}
  But besides real diseases we are subject to many that are only            
imaginary, for which the physicians have invented imaginary cures;          
these have their several names, and so have the drugs that are              
proper for them, and with these our female Yahoos are always infested.      
  One great excellency in this tribe is their skiff at prognostics,         
wherein they seldom fail; their predictions in real diseases, when          
they rise to any degree of malignity, generally portending death,           
which is always in their power, when recovery is not: and therefore,        
upon any unexpected signs of amendment, after they have pronounced          
their sentence, rather than be accused as false prophets, they know         
how to approve their sagacity to the world by a seasonable dose.            
  They are likewise of special use to husbands and wives who are grown      
weary of their mates, to eldest sons, to great ministers of state, and      
often to princes.                                                           
  I had formerly upon occasion discoursed with my master upon the           
nature of government in general, and particularly of our own excellent      
constitution, deservedly the wonder and envy of the whole world. But        
having here accidentally mentioned a minister of state, he commanded        
me some time after to inform him what species of Yahoo I                    
particularly meant by that appellation.                                     
  I told him that a First or Chief Minister of State, who was the           
person I intended to describe, was a creature wholly exempt from joy        
and grief, love and hatred, pity and anger; at least made use of no         
other passions but a violent desire of wealth, power, and titles; that      
he applies his words to all uses, except to the indication of his           
mind; that he never tells a truth but with an intent that you should        
take it for a lie; nor a lie but with a design that you should take it      
for a truth; that those he speaks worst of behind their backs are in        
the surest way of preferment; and whenever he begins to praise you          
to others or to yourself, you are from that day forlorn. The worst          
mark you can receive is a promise, especially when it is confirmed          
with an oath; after which every wise man retires, and gives over all        
hopes.                                                                      
                                                    {P_4|CH_6 ^paragraph 10}
  There are three methods by which a man may rise to be chief               
minister: the first is by knowing how with prudence to dispose of a         
wife, a daughter, or a sister: the second, by betraying or undermining      
his predecessor: and the third is by a furious zeal in public               
assemblies against the corruptions of the court. But a wise prince          
would rather choose to employ those who practice the last of these          
methods; because such zealots prove always the most obsequious and          
subservient to the will and passions of their master. That these            
ministers having all employments at their disposal, preserve                
themselves in power by bribing the majority of a senate or great            
council; and at last, by an expedient called an Act of Indemnity            
(whereof I described the nature to him) they secure themselves from         
after reckonings, and retire from the public, laden with the spoils of      
the nation.                                                                 
  The palace of a chief minister is a seminary to breed up others in        
his own trade: the pages, lackeys, and porter, by imitating their           
master, become ministers of state in their several districts, and           
learn to excel in the three principal ingredients of insolence, lying,      
and bribery. Accordingly they have a subaltern court paid to them by        
persons of the best rank, and sometimes by the force of dexterity           
and impudence arrive through several gradations to be successors to         
their lord.                                                                 
  He is usually governed by a decayed wench or favorite footman, who        
are the tunnels through which all graces are conveyed, and may              
properly be called, in the last resort, the governors of the kingdom.       
  One day in discourse my master, having heard me mention the nobility      
of my country, was pleased to make me a compliment which I could not        
pretend to deserve: that he was sure I must have been born of some          
noble family, because I far exceeded in shape, color, and cleanliness,      
all the Yahoos of his nation, although I seemed to fail in strength         
and agility, which must be imputed to my different way of living            
from those other brutes; and besides I was not only endowed with the        
faculty of speech, but likewise with some rudiments of reason, to a         
degree that with all his acquaintance I passed for a prodigy.               
  He made me observe, that among the Houyhnhnms, the white, the             
sorrel, and the iron grey were not so exactly shaped as the bay, the        
dapple grey, and the black; nor born with equal talents of the mind,        
or a capacity to improve them; and therefore continued always in the        
condition of servants, without ever aspiring to match out of their own      
race, which in that country would be reckoned monstrous and unnatural.      
                                                    {P_4|CH_6 ^paragraph 15}
  I made his Honor my most humble acknowledgments for the good opinion      
he was pleased to conceive of me; but assured him at the same time          
that my birth was of the lower sort, having been born of plain              
honest parents, who were just able to give me a tolerable education;        
that nobility among us was altogether a different thing from the            
idea he had of it; that our young noblemen are bred from their              
childhood in idleness and luxury; that as soon as years will permit,        
they consume their vigor and contract odious diseases among lewd            
females; and when their fortunes are almost ruined, they marry some         
woman of mean birth, disagreeable person, and unsound constitution,         
merely for the sake of money, whom they hate and despise. That the          
productions of such marriages are generally scrofulous, rickety, or         
deformed children; by which means the family seldom continues above         
three generations, unless the wife takes care to provide a healthy          
father among her neighbors or domestics, in order to improve and            
continue the breed. That a weak diseased body, a meagre countenance,        
and sallow complexion, are the true marks of noble blood; and a             
healthy robust appearance is so disgraceful in a man of quality,            
that the world concludes his real father to have been a groom or a          
coachman. The imperfections of his mind run parallel with those of his      
body, being a composition of spleen, dullness, ignorance, caprice,          
sensuality and pride.                                                       
  Without the consent of this illustrious body no law can be                
enacted, repealed, or altered; and these have the decision of all           
our possessions without appeal.                                             
                                                                            
P_4|CH_7                                                                    
  CHAPTER VII                                                               
-                                                                           
  The reader may be disposed to wonder how I could prevail on myself        
to give so free a representation of my own species, among a race of         
mortals who were already too apt to conceive the vilest opinion of          
human kind, from that entire congruity betwixt me and their Yahoos.         
But I must freely confess that the many virtues of those excellent          
quadrupeds placed in opposite view to human corruptions, had so far         
opened my eyes and enlarged my understanding, that I began to view the      
actions and passions of man in a very different light, and to think         
the honor of my own kind not worth managing; which, besides, it was         
impossible for me to do before a person of so acute a judgment as my        
master, who daily convinced me of a thousand faults in myself, whereof      
I had not the least perception before, and which among us would             
never be numbered even among human infirmities. I had likewise learned      
from his example an utter detestation of all falsehood or disguise,         
and truth appeared so amiable to me, that I determined upon                 
sacrificing everything to it.                                               
  Let me deal so candidly with the reader as to confess that there was      
yet a much stronger motive for the freedom I took in my representation      
of things. I had not been a year in this country before I contracted        
such a love and veneration for the inhabitants, that I entered on a         
firm resolution never to return to human kind, but to pass the rest of      
my life among these admirable Houyhnhnms in the contemplation and           
practice of every virtue; where I could have no example or                  
incitement to vice. But it was decreed by fortune, my perpetual enemy,      
that so great a felicity should not fall to my share. However, it is        
now some comfort to reflect that in what I said of my countrymen I          
extenuated their faults as much as I dared before so strict an              
examiner, and upon every article gave as favorable a turn as the            
matter would bear. For indeed who is there alive that will not be           
swayed by his bias and partiality to the place of his birth?                
  I have related the substance of several conversations I had with          
my master, during the greatest part of the time I had the honor to          
be in his service, but have indeed for brevity sake omitted much            
more than is here set down.                                                 
  When I had answered all his questions, and his curiosity seemed to        
be fully satisfied, he sent for me one morning early, and commanding        
me to sit down at some distance (an honor which he had never before         
conferred upon me), he said he had been very seriously considering          
my whole story, as far as it related both to myself and my country;         
that he looked upon us as sort of animals to whose share, by what           
accident he could not conjecture, some small pittance of reason had         
fallen, whereof we made no other use than by its assistance to              
aggravate our natural corruptions, and to acquire new ones which            
nature had not given us. That we disarmed ourselves of the few              
abilities she had bestowed, had been very successful in multiplying         
our original wants, and seemed to spend our whole lives in vain             
endeavors to supply them by our own inventions. That as to myself,          
it was manifest I had neither the strength or agility of a common           
Yahoo, that I walked infirmly on my hinder feet, had found out a            
contrivance to make my claws of no use or defense, and to remove the        
hair from my chin, which was intended as a shelter from the sun and         
the weather. Lastly, that I could neither run with speed, nor climb         
trees like my brethren (as he called them) the Yahoos in this country.      
  That our institutions of government and law were plainly owing to         
our gross defects in reason, and by consequence, in virtue; because         
reason alone is sufficient to govern a rational creature; which was         
therefore a character we had no pretense to challenge, even from the        
account I had given of my own people; although he manifestly perceived      
that in order to favor them I had concealed many particulars, and           
often said the thing which was not.                                         
                                                     {P_4|CH_7 ^paragraph 5}
  He was the more confirmed in this opinion, because he observed            
that as I agreed in every feature of my body with other Yahoos, except      
where it was to my real disadvantage in point of strength, speed and        
activity, the shortness of my claws, and some other particulars             
where nature had no part; so from the representation I had given him        
of our lives, our manners, and our actions, he found as near a              
resemblance in the disposition of our minds. He said the Yahoos were        
known to hate one another more than they did any different species          
of animals; and the reason usually assigned was the odiousness of           
their own shapes, which all could see in the rest, but not in               
themselves. He had therefore begun to think it not unwise in us to          
cover our bodies, and by that invention conceal many of our own             
deformities from each other, which would else be hardly supportable.        
But he now found he had been mistaken, and that the dissensions of          
those brutes in his country were owing to the same cause with ours, as      
I had described them. For if (said he) you throw among five Yahoos          
as much food as would be sufficient for fifty, they will, instead of        
eating peaceably, fall together by the ears, each single one impatient      
to have all to itself; and therefore a servant was usually employed to      
stand by while they were feeding abroad, and those kept at home were        
tied at a distance from each other: that if a cow died of age or            
accident, before a Houyhnhnm could secure it for his own Yahoos, those      
in the neighborhood would come in herds to seize it, and then would         
ensue such a battle as I had described, with terrible wounds made by        
their claws on both sides, although they seldom were able to kill           
one another, for want of such convenient instruments of death as we         
had invented. At other times the like battles have been fought between      
the Yahoos of several neighborhoods without any visible cause; those        
of one district watching all opportunities to surprise the next before      
they are prepared. But if they find their project has miscarried, they      
return home, and, for want of enemies, engage in what I call a civil        
war among themselves.                                                       
  That in some fields of his country there are certain shining              
stones of several colors, whereof the Yahoos are violently fond, and        
when part of these stones is fixed in the earth, as it sometimes            
happens, they will dig with their claws for whole days to get them          
out, then carry them away, and hide them by heaps in their kennels;         
but still looking round with great caution, for fear their comrades         
should find out their treasure. My master said he could never discover      
the reason of this unnatural appetite, or how these stones could be of      
any use to a Yahoo; but now he believed it might proceed from the same      
principle of avarice which I had ascribed to mankind: that he had           
once, by way of experiment, privately removed a heap of these stones        
from the place where one of his Yahoos had buried it: whereupon the         
sordid animal missing his treasure, by his loud lamenting brought           
the whole herd to the place, there miserably howled, then fell to           
biting and tearing the rest, began to pine away, would neither eat nor      
sleep nor work, till he ordered a servant privately to convey the           
stones into the same hole and hide them as before; which when his           
Yahoo had found, he presently recovered his spirits and good humor,         
but took good care to remove them to a better hiding place, and has         
ever since been a very serviceable brute.                                   
  My master farther assured me, which I also observed myself, that          
in the fields where the shining stones abound, the fiercest and most        
frequent battles are fought, occasioned by perpetual inroads of the         
neighboring Yahoos.                                                         
  He said it was common when two Yahoos discovered such a stone in a        
field, and were contending which of them should be the proprietor, a        
third would take the advantage, and carry it away from them both;           
which my master would needs contend to have some kind of resemblance        
with our suits at law; wherein I thought it for our credit not to           
undeceive him; since the decision he mentioned was much more equitable      
than many decrees among us; because the plaintiff and defendant             
there lost nothing beside the stone they contended for, whereas our         
courts of equity would never have dismissed the cause while either          
of them had any thing left.                                                 
  My master, his discourse, said there was nothing that rendered the        
Yahoos more odious than their undistinguishing appetite to devour           
every thing that came in their way, whether herbs, roots, berries, the      
corrupted flesh of animals, or all mingled together; and it was             
peculiar in their temper that they were fonder of what they could           
get by rapine or stealth at a greater distance than much better food        
provided for them at home. If their prey held out, they would eat till      
they were ready to burst, after which nature had pointed out to them a      
certain root that gave them a general evacuation.                           
                                                    {P_4|CH_7 ^paragraph 10}
  There was also another kind of root very juicy, but somewhat rare         
and difficult to be found, which the Yahoos sought for with much            
eagerness, and would suck it with great delight; and it produced in         
them the same effects that wine has upon us. It would make them             
sometimes hug, and sometimes tear one another; they would howl and          
grin, and chatter, and reel, and tumble, and then fall asleep in the        
dirt.                                                                       
  I did indeed observe that the Yahoos were the only animals in this        
country subject to any diseases; which, however, were much fewer            
than horses have among us, and contracted not by any ill treatment          
they meet with, but by the nastiness and greediness of that sordid          
brute. Neither has their language any more than a general                   
appellation for those maladies, which is borrowed from the name of the      
beast, and called Hnea-Yahoo, or the Yahoo's evil, and the cure             
prescribed is a mixture of their own dung and urine forcibly put            
down the Yahoo's throat. This I have since often known to have been         
taken with success, and do freely recommend it to my countrymen, for        
the public good, as an admirable specific against all diseases              
produced by repletion.                                                      
  As to learning, government, arts, manufactures, and the like, my          
master confessed he could find little or no resemblance between the         
Yahoos of that country and those in ours. For he only meant to observe      
what parity there was in our natures. He had heard indeed some curious      
Houyhnhnms observe that in most herds there was a sort of ruling Yahoo      
(as among us there is generally some leading or principal stag in a         
park), who was always more deformed in body and mischievous in              
disposition than any of the rest. That this leader had usually a            
favorite as like himself as he could get, whose employment was to lick      
his master's feet and posteriors, and drive the female Yahoos to his        
kennel; for which he was now and then rewarded with a piece of ass's        
flesh. This favorite is hated by the whole herd, and therefore to           
protect himself, keeps always near the person of his leader. He             
usually continues in office till worse can be found; but the very           
moment he is discarded, his successor, at the head of all the Yahoos        
in that district, young and old, male and female, come in a body,           
and discharge their excrements upon him from head to foot. But how far      
this might be applicable to our courts and favorites, and ministers of      
state, my master said I could best determine.                               
  I dared make no return to this malicious insinuation, which               
debased human understanding below the sagacity of a common hound,           
who has judgment enough to distinguish and follow the cry of the            
ablest dog in the pack, without being ever mistaken.                        
  My master told me there were some qualities remarkable in the             
Yahoos, which he had not observed me to mention, or at least very           
slightly, in the accounts I had given him of human kind. He said those      
animals, like other brutes, had their females in common; but in this        
they differed, that the she Yahoo would admit the male while she was        
pregnant; and that the hes would quarrel and fight with the females as      
fiercely as with each other. Both which practices were such degrees of      
brutality, that no other sensitive creature ever arrived at.                
                                                    {P_4|CH_7 ^paragraph 15}
  Another thing he wondered at in the Yahoos was their strange              
disposition to nastiness and dirt, whereas there appears to be a            
natural love of cleanliness in all other animals. As to the former          
accusation, I was glad to let it pass without any reply, because I had      
not a word to offer upon it in defense of my species, which                 
otherwise I certainly had done from my own inclinations. But I could        
have easily vindicated human kind from the imputation of singularity        
upon the last article, if there had been any swine in that country (as      
unluckily for me there were not), which although it may be a sweeter        
quadruped than a Yahoo, cannot I humbly conceive in justice pretend to      
more cleanliness; and so his Honor himself must have owned, if he           
had seen their filthy way of feeding, and their custom of wallowing         
and sleeping in the mud.                                                    
  My master likewise mentioned another quality which his servants           
had discovered in several Yahoos, and to him was wholly unaccountable.      
He said, a fancy would sometimes take a Yahoo to retire into a corner,      
to lie down and howl and groan, and spurn away all that came near him,      
although he were young and fat, wanted neither food nor water; nor did      
the servants imagine what could possibly ail him. And the only              
remedy they found was to set him to hard work, after which he would         
infallibly come to himself. To this I was silent out of partiality          
to my own kind; yet here I could plainly discover the true seeds of         
spleen, which only seizes on the lazy, the luxurious, and the rich;         
who, if they were forced to undergo the same regimen, I would               
undertake for the cure.                                                     
  His Honor had further observed that a female Yahoo would often stand      
behind a bank or a bush, to gaze on the young males passing by, and         
then appear, and hide, using many antic gestures and grimaces, at           
which time it was observed that she had a most offensive smell; and         
when any of the males advanced, would slowly retire, looking often          
back, and with a counterfeit show of fear, run off into some                
convenient place where she knew the male would follow her.                  
  At other times if a female stranger came among them, three or four        
of her own sex would get about her, and stare and chatter, and grin,        
and smell her all over; and then turn off with gestures that seemed to      
express contempt and disdain.                                               
  Perhaps my master might refine a little in these speculations, which      
he had drawn from what he observed himself, or had been told him by         
others; however, I could not reflect without some amazement, and            
much sorrow, that the rudiments of coquetry, censure, and scandal,          
should have place by instinct in womankind.                                 
                                                    {P_4|CH_7 ^paragraph 20}
  I expected every moment that my master would accuse the Yahoos of         
those unnatural appetites in both sexes, so common among us. But            
nature, it seems, has not been so expert a school mistress; and             
these politer pleasures are entirely the productions of art and             
reason, on our side of the globe.                                           
                                                                            
P_4|CH_8                                                                    
  CHAPTER VIII                                                              
-                                                                           
  As I ought to have understood human nature much better than I             
supposed it possible for my master to do, so it was easy to apply           
the character he gave of the Yahoos to myself and my countrymen; and I      
believed I could yet make farther discoveries from my own observation.      
I therefore often begged his favor to let me go among the herds of          
Yahoos in the neighborhood, to which he always very graciously              
consented, being perfectly convinced that the hatred I bore those           
brutes would never suffer me to be corrupted by them; and his Honor         
ordered one of his servants, a strong sorrel nag, very honest and           
good-natured, to be my guard, without whose protection I dare not           
undertake such adventures. For I have already told the reader how much      
I was pestered by those odious animals upon my first arrival. And I         
afterwards failed very narrowly three or four times of falling into         
their clutches, when I happened to stray at any distance without my         
hanger. And I have reason to believe they had some imagination that         
I was of their own species, which I often assisted myself, by               
stripping up my sleeves, and showing my naked arms and breast in their      
sight, when my protector was with me. At which times they would             
approach as near as they dare, and imitate my actions after the manner      
of monkeys, but ever with great signs of hatred; as a tame jackdaw          
with cap and stockings is always persecuted by the wild ones, when          
he happens to get among them.                                               
  They are prodigiously nimble from their infancy; however, I once          
caught a young male of three years old, and endeavored by all marks of      
tenderness to make it quiet; but the little imp fell a squalling and        
scratching and biting with such violence that I was forced to let it        
go; and it was high time, for a whole troop of old ones came about          
us at the noise, but finding the cub was safe (for away it ran), and        
my sorrel nag being by, they dare not venture near us. I observed           
the young animal's flesh to smell very rank, and the stink was              
somewhat between a weasel and a fox, but much more disagreeable. I          
forgot another circumstance (and perhaps I might have the reader's          
pardon if it were wholly omitted), that while I held the odious vermin      
in my hands, it voided its filthy excrements of a yellow liquid             
substance, all over my clothes; but by good fortune there was a             
small brook hard by, where I washed myself as clean as I could;             
although I dare not come into my master's presence, until I were            
sufficiently aired.                                                         
  By what I could discover, the Yahoos appear to be the most                
unteachable of all animals, their capacities never reaching higher          
than to draw or carry burdens. Yet I am of opinion this defect              
arises chiefly from a perverse, restive disposition. For they are           
cunning, malicious, treacherous, and revengeful. They are strong and        
hardy, but of a cowardly spirit, and by consequence, insolent, abject,      
and cruel. It is observed that the red haired of both sexes are more        
libidinous and mischievous than the rest, whom yet they much exceed in      
strength and activity.                                                      
  The Houyhnhnms keep the Yahoos for present use in huts not far            
from the house; but the rest are sent abroad to certain fields,             
where they dig up roots, eat several kinds of herbs, and search             
about for carrion, or sometimes catch weasels and luhimuhs (a sort          
of wild rat), which they greedily devour. Nature has taught them to         
dig deep holes with their nails on the side of a rising ground,             
wherein they lie by themselves; only the kennels of the females are         
larger, sufficient to hold two or three cubs.                               
  They swim from their infancy like frogs, and are able to continue         
long under water, where they often take fish, which the females             
carry home to their young. And upon this occasion, I hope the reader        
will pardon my relating an odd adventure.                                   
                                                     {P_4|CH_8 ^paragraph 5}
  Being one day abroad with my protector, the sorrel nag, and the           
weather exceeding hot, I entreated him to let me bathe in a river that      
was near. He consented, and I immediately stripped myself stark naked,      
and went down softly into the stream. It happened that a young              
female Yahoo, standing behind a bank, saw the whole proceeding, and         
inflamed by desire, as the nag and I conjectured, came running with         
all speed, and leaped into the water, within five yards of the place        
where I bathed. I was never in my life so terribly frighted; the nag        
was grazing at some distance, not suspecting any harm. She embraced me      
after a most fulsome manner; I roared as loud as I could, and the           
nag came galloping towards me, whereupon she quitted her grasp, with        
the utmost reluctancy, and leaped upon the opposite bank, where she         
stood gazing and howling all the time I was putting on my clothes.          
  This was matter of diversion to my master and his family, as well as      
of mortification to myself. For now I could no longer deny that I           
was a real Yahoo in every limb and feature, since the females had a         
natural propensity to me, as one of their own species. Neither was the      
hair of this brute of a red color (which might have been some excuse        
for an appetite a little irregular), but black as a sloe, and her           
countenance did not make an appearance altogether so hideous as the         
rest of the kind; for, I think, she could not be above eleven years         
old.                                                                        
  Having lived three years in this country, the reader I suppose            
will expect that I should, like other travelers, give him some account      
of the manners and customs of its inhabitants, which it was indeed          
my principal study to learn.                                                
  As these noble Houyhnhnms are endowed by nature with a general            
disposition to all virtues, and have no conceptions or ideas of what        
is evil in a rational creature, so their grand maxim is to cultivate        
reason, and to be wholly governed by it. Neither is reason among            
them a point problematical as with us, where men can argue with             
plausibility on both sides of the question; but strikes you with            
immediate conviction; as it must needs do where it is not mingled,          
obscured, or discolored by passion and interest. I remember it was          
with extreme difficulty that I could bring my master to understand the      
meaning of the word opinion, or how a point could be disputable;            
because reason taught us to affirm or deny only where we are                
certain, and beyond our knowledge we cannot do either. So that              
controversies, wranglings, disputes, and positiveness in false or           
dubious propositions, are evils unknown among the Houyhnhnms. In the        
like manner when I used to explain to him our several systems of            
natural philosophy, he would laugh that a creature pretending to            
reason should value itself upon the knowledge of other people's             
conjectures, and in things where that knowledge, if it were certain,        
could be of no use. Wherein he agreed entirely with the sentiments          
of Socrates, as Plato delivers them; which I mention as the highest         
honor I can do that prince of philosophers. I have often since              
reflected what destruction such a doctrine would make in the libraries      
of Europe, and how many paths to fame would be then shut up in the          
learned world.                                                              
  Friendship and benevolence are the two principal virtues among the        
Houyhnhnms, and these not confined to particular objects, but               
universal to the whole race. For a stranger from the remotest part          
is equally treated with the nearest neighbor, and wherever he goes          
looks upon himself as at home. They preserve decency and civility in        
the highest degrees, but are altogether ignorant of ceremony. They          
have no fondness for their colts or foals, but the care they take in        
educating them proceeds entirely from the dictates of reason. And I         
observed my master to show the same affection to his neighbor's             
issue that he had for his own. They will have it that nature teaches        
them to love the whole species, and it is reason only that makes a          
distinction of persons, where there is a superior degree of virtue.         
                                                    {P_4|CH_8 ^paragraph 10}
  When the matron Houyhnhnms have produced one of each sex, they no         
longer accompany with their consorts, except they lose one of their         
issue by some casualty, which very seldom happens; but in such a            
case they meet again; or when the like accident befalls a person whose      
wife is past bearing, some other couple bestow on him one of their own      
colts, and then go together again till the mother is pregnant. This         
caution is necessary to prevent the country from being overburdened         
with numbers. But the race of inferior Houyhnhnms bred up to be             
servants is not so strictly limited upon this article; these are            
allowed to produce three of each sex, to be domestics in the noble          
families.                                                                   
  In their marriages they are exactly careful to choose such colors as      
will not make any disagreeable mixture in the breed. Strength is            
chiefly valued in the male, and comeliness in the female; not upon the      
account of love, but to preserve the race from degenerating; for where      
a female happens to excel in strength, a consort is chosen with regard      
to comeliness. Courtship, love, presents, jointures, settlements, have      
no place in their thoughts, or terms whereby to express them in             
their language. The young couple meet and are joined, merely because        
it is the determination of their parents and friends: it is what            
they see done every day, and they look upon it as one of the necessary      
actions of a rational being. But the violation of marriage, or any          
other unchastity, was never heard of; and the married pair pass             
their lives with the same friendship and mutual benevolence that            
they bear to all others of the same species who come in their way;          
without jealousy, fondness, quarrelling, or discontent.                     
  In educating the youth of both sexes, their method is admirable, and      
highly deserves our imitation. These are not suffered to taste a grain      
of oats, except upon certain days, till eighteen years old; nor             
milk, but very rarely; and in summer they graze two hours in the            
morning, and as long in the evening, which their parents likewise           
observe; but the servants are not allowed above half that time, and         
a great part of their grass is brought home, which they eat at the          
most convenient hours, when they can be best spared from work.              
  Temperance, industry, exercise and cleanliness, are the lessons           
equally enjoined to the young ones of both sexes; and my master             
thought it monstrous in us to give the females a different kind of          
education from the males, except in some articles of domestic               
management; whereby, as he truly observed, one half of our natives          
were good for nothing but bringing children into the world; and to          
trust the care of our children to such useless animals, he said, was        
yet a greater instance of brutality.                                        
  But the Houyhnhnms train up their youth to strength, speed, and           
hardiness, by exercising them in running races up and down steep            
hills, and over hard stony grounds; and when they are all in a              
sweat, they are ordered to leap over head and ears into a pond or           
river. Four times a year the youth of a certain district meet to            
show their proficiency in running and leaping, and other feats of           
strength and agility; where the victor is rewarded with a song made in      
his or her praise. On this festival the servants drive a herd of            
Yahoos into the field, laden with hay and oats and milk, for a              
repast to the Houyhnhnms; after which these brutes are immediately          
driven back again, for fear of being noisome to the assembly.               
                                                    {P_4|CH_8 ^paragraph 15}
  Every fourth year, at the vernal equinox, there is a                      
representative council of the whole nation, which meets in a plain          
about twenty miles from our house, and continues about five or six          
days. Here they inquire into the state and condition of the several         
districts; whether they abound or be deficient in hay or oats, or cows      
or Yahoos. And wherever there is any want (which is seldom) it is           
immediately supplied by unanimous consent and contribution. Here            
likewise the regulation of children is settled: as for instance, if         
a Houyhnhnm has two males, he changes one of them with another that         
has two females; and when a child has been lost by any casualty, where      
the mother is past breeding, it is determined what family in the            
district shall breed another to supply the loss.                            
                                                                            
P_4|CH_9                                                                    
  CHAPTER IX                                                                
-                                                                           
  One of these grand assemblies was held in my time, about three            
months before my departure, whither my master went as the                   
representative of our district. In this council was resumed their           
old debate, and indeed, the only debate which ever happened in that         
country; whereof my master after his return gave me a very                  
particular account.                                                         
  The question to be debated was whether the Yahoos should be               
exterminated from the face of the earth. One of the members for the         
affirmative offered several arguments of great strength and weight,         
alleging that as the Yahoos were the most filthy, noisome, and              
deformed animal which nature ever produced, so they were the most           
restive and indocible, mischievous and malicious: they would privately      
suck the teats of the Houyhnhnms' cows, kill and devour their cats,         
trample down their oats and grass, if they were not continually             
watched, and commit a thousand other extravagancies. He took notice of      
a general tradition, that Yahoos had not been always in that                
country; but that many ages ago two of these brutes appeared                
together upon a mountain, whether produced by the heat of the sun upon      
corrupted mud and slime, or from the ooze and froth of the sea, was         
never known. That these Yahoos engendered, and their brood in a             
short time grew so numerous as to overrun and infest the whole nation.      
That the Houyhnhnms to get rid of this evil, made a general hunting,        
and at last enclosed the whole herd; and destroying the elder, every        
Houyhnhnm kept two young ones in a kennel, and brought them to such         
a degree of tameness, as an animal so savage by nature can be               
capable of acquiring; using them for draught and carriage. That             
there seemed to be much truth in this tradition, and that those             
creatures could not be Ylnhniamshy (or aborigines of the land),             
because of the violent hatred the Houyhnhnms, as well as all other          
animals, bore them; which although their evil disposition sufficiently      
deserved, could never have arrived at so high a degree, if they had         
been aborigines, or else they would have long since been rooted out.        
That the inhabitants taking a fancy to use the service of the               
Yahoos, had very imprudently neglected to cultivate the breed of            
asses, which were a comely animal, easily kept, more tame and orderly,      
without any offensive smell, strong enough for labor, although they         
yield to the other in agility of body; and if their braying be no           
agreeable sound, it is far preferable to the horrible howlings of           
the Yahoos.                                                                 
  Several others declared their sentiments to the same purpose, when        
my master proposed an expedient to the assembly, whereof he had indeed      
borrowed the hint from me. He approved of the tradition mentioned by        
the honorable member who spoke before, and affirmed that the two            
Yahoos said to be first seen among them had been driven there over the      
sea; that coming to land and being forsaken by their companions they        
retired to the mountains, and degenerating by degrees, became in            
process of time, much more savage than those of their own species in        
the country from where these two originals came. The reason of his          
assertion was that he had now in his possession a certain wonderful         
Yahoo (meaning myself), which most of them had heard of, and many of        
them had seen. He then related to them how he first found me; that          
my body was all covered with an artificial composure of the skins           
and hairs of other animals; that I spoke in a language of my own,           
and had thoroughly learned theirs; that I had related to him the            
accidents which brought me there; that when he saw me without my            
covering I was an exact Yahoo in every part, only of a whiter color,        
less hairy, and with shorter claws. He added how I had endeavored to        
persuade him that in my own and other countries the Yahoos acted as         
the governing, rational animal, and held the Houyhnhnms in                  
servitude; that he observed in me all the qualities of a Yahoo, only a      
little more civilized by some tincture of reason, which however was in      
a degree as far inferior to the Houyhnhnm race as the Yahoos of             
their country were to me; that among other things I mentioned a custom      
we had of castrating Houyhnhnms when they were young, in order to           
render them tame; that the operation was easy and safe; that it was no      
shame to learn wisdom from brutes, as industry is taught by the ant,        
and building by the swallow. (For so I translate the word lyhannh,          
although it be a much larger fowl.) That this invention might be            
practiced upon the younger Yahoos here, which, besides rendering            
them tractable and fitter for use, would in an age put an end to the        
whole species without destroying life. That in the meantime the             
Houyhnhnms should be exhorted to cultivate the breed of asses,              
which, as they are in all respects more valuable brutes, so they            
have this advantage, to be fit for service at five years old, which         
the others are not till twelve.                                             
  This was all my master thought fit to tell me at that time of what        
passed in the grand council. But he was pleased to conceal one              
particular, which related personally to myself, whereof I soon felt         
the unhappy effect, as the reader will know in its proper place, and        
from which I date all the succeeding misfortunes of my life.                
  The Houyhnhnms have no letters, and consequently their knowledge          
is all traditional. But there happening few events of any moment among      
a people so well united, naturally disposed to every virtue, wholly         
governed by reason, and cut off from all commerce with other                
nations, the historical part is easily preserved without burdening          
their memories. I have already observed that they are subject to no         
diseases, and therefore can have no need of physicians. However,            
they have excellent medicines composed of herbs, to cure accidental         
bruises and cuts in the pastern or frog of the foot by sharp stones,        
as well as other maims and hurts in the several parts of the body.          
                                                     {P_4|CH_9 ^paragraph 5}
  They calculate the year by the revolution of the sun and the moon,        
but use no subdivisions into weeks. They are well enough acquainted         
with the motions of those two luminaries, and understand the nature of      
eclipses; and this is the utmost progress of their astronomy.               
  In poetry they must be allowed to excel all other mortals; wherein        
the justness of their similes, and the minuteness, as well as               
exactness of their descriptions, are indeed inimitable. Their verses        
abound very much in both of these, and usually contain either some          
exalted notions of friendship and benevolence, or the praises of those      
who were victors in races and other bodily exercises. Their buildings,      
although very rude and simple, are not inconvenient, but well               
contrived to defend them from all injuries of cold and heat. They have      
a kind of tree, which at forty years old loosens in the root, and           
falls with the first storm: they grow very straight, and being pointed      
like stakes with a sharp stone (for the Houyhnhnms know not the use of      
iron), they stick them erect in the ground about ten inches asunder,        
and then weave in oat straw, or sometimes wattles betwixt them. The         
roof is made after the same manner, and so are the doors.                   
  The Houyhnhnms use the hollow part between the pastern and the            
hoof of their fore feet as we do our hands, and this with greater           
dexterity than I could at first imagine. I have seen a white mare of        
our family thread a needle (which I lent her on purpose) with that          
joint. They milk their cows, reap their oats, and do all the work           
which requires hands, in the same manner. They have a kind of hard          
flints, which by grinding against other stones, they form into              
instruments, that serve instead of wedges, axes, and hammers. With          
tools made of these flints they likewise cut their hay and reap             
their oats, which there groweth naturally in several fields: the            
Yahoos draw home the sheaves in carriages, and the servants tread them      
in certain covered huts, to get out the grain, which is kept in             
stores. They make a rude kind of earthen and wooden vessels, and            
bake the former in the sun.                                                 
  If they can avoid casualties, they die only of old age, and are           
buried in the most obscure places that can be found, their friends and      
relations expressing neither joy nor grief at their departure; nor          
does the dying person discover the least regret that he is leaving the      
world, any more than if he were upon returning home from a visit to         
one of his neighbors. I remember my master having once made an              
appointment with a friend and his family to come to his house upon          
some affair of importance, on the day fixed the mistress and her two        
children came very late; she made two excuses, first for her                
husband, who, as she said, happened that very morning to shnuwnh.           
The word is strongly expressive in their language, but not easily           
rendered into English; it signifies, to retire to his first mother.         
Her excuse for not coming sooner was that her husband dying late in         
the morning, she was a good while consulting her servants about a           
convenient place where his body should be laid; and I observed she          
behaved herself at our house as cheerfully as the rest, and died about      
three months after.                                                         
  They live generally to seventy or seventy-five years, very seldom to      
fourscore: some weeks before their death they feel a gradual decay,         
but without pain. During this time they are much visited by their           
friends, because they cannot go abroad with their usual ease and            
satisfaction. However, about ten days before their death, which they        
seldom fail in computing, they return the visits that have been made        
them by those who are nearest in the neighborhood, being carried in         
a convenient sledge drawn by Yahoos; which vehicle they use, not            
only upon this occasion, but when they grow old, upon long journeys,        
or when they are lamed by any accident. And therefore when the dying        
Houyhnhnms return those visits, they take a solemn leave of their           
friends, as if they were going to some remote part of the country,          
where they designed to pass the rest of their lives.                        
                                                    {P_4|CH_9 ^paragraph 10}
  I know not whether it may be worth observing that the Houyhnhnms          
have no word in their language to express any thing that is evil,           
except what they borrow from the deformities or ill qualities of the        
Yahoos. Thus they denote the folly of a servant, an omission of a           
child, a stone that cuts their feet, a continuance of foul or               
unseasonable weather, and the like, by adding to each the epithet of        
Yahoo. For instance, Hhnm Yahoo, Whnaholm Yahoo, Ynlhmndwihlma Yahoo,       
and an ill-contrived house Ynholmhnmrohlnw Yahoo.                           
  I could with great pleasure enlarge further upon the manners and          
virtues of this excellent people; but intending in a short time to          
publish a volume by itself expressly upon that subject, I refer the         
reader there, and in the meantime, proceed to relate my own sad             
catastrophe,                                                                
                                                                            
P_4|CH_10                                                                   
  CHAPTER X                                                                 
-                                                                           
  I had settled my little economy to my own heart's content. My master      
had ordered a room to be made for me after their manner, about six          
yards from the house; the sides and floors of which I plastered with        
clay, and covered with rushmats of my own contriving; I had beaten          
hemp, which there grows wild, and made of it a sort of ticking; this I      
filled with the feathers of several birds I had taken with springes         
made of Yahoos' hairs, and were excellent food. I had worked two            
chairs with my knife, the sorrel nag helping me in the grosser and          
more laborious part. When my clothes were worn to rags, I made              
myself others with the skins of rabbits, and of a certain beautiful         
animal about the same size, called nnuhnoh, the skin of which is            
covered with a fine down. Of these I likewise made very tolerable           
stockings. I soled my shoes with wood which I cut from a tree and           
fitted to the upper leather, and when this was worn out, I supplied it      
with the skins of Yahoos dried in the sun. I often got honey out of         
hollow trees, which I mingled with water, or ate with my bread. No man      
could more verify the truth of these two maxims, That nature is very        
easily satisfied; and That necessity is the mother of invention. I          
enjoyed perfect health of body, and tranquillity of mind; I did not         
feel the treachery or inconstancy of a friend, nor the injuries of a        
secret or open enemy. I had no occasion of bribing, flattering, or          
pimping to procure the favor of any great man or of his minion. I           
wanted no fence against fraud or oppression; here was neither               
physician to destroy my body, nor lawyer to ruin my fortune; no             
informer to watch my words and actions, or forge accusations against        
me for hire; here were no gibers, censurers, backbiters,                    
pickpockets, highwaymen, housebreakers, attorneys, bawds, buffoons,         
gamesters, politicians, wits, splenetics, tedious talkers,                  
controvertists, ravishers, murderers, robbers, virtuosos; no leaders        
or followers of party and faction; no encouragers to vice, by               
seducement or examples; no dungeon, axes, gibbets, whipping posts,          
or pillories; no cheating shopkeepers or mechanics; no pride,               
vanity, or affectation; no fops, bullies, drunkards, strolling whores,      
or poxes; no ranting, lewd, expensive wives; no stupid, proud pedants;      
no importunate, overbearing, quarrelsome, noisy, roaring, empty,            
conceited, swearing companions; no scoundrels, raised from the dust         
for the sake of their vices, or nobility thrown into it on account          
of their virtues: no lords, fiddlers, judges, or dancing masters.           
  I had the favor of being admitted to several Houyhnhnms, who came to      
visit or dine with my master; where his Honor graciously suffered me        
to wait in the room, and listen to their discourse. Both he and his         
company would often descend to ask me questions, and receive my             
answers. I had also sometimes the honor of attending my master in           
his visits to others. I never presumed to speak, except in answer to a      
question; and then I did it with inward regret, because it was a            
loss of so much time for improving myself; but I was infinitely             
delighted with the station of an humble auditor in such conversations,      
where nothing passed but what was useful, expressed in the fewest           
and most significant words; where the greatest decency was observed,        
without the least degree of ceremony; where no person spoke without         
being pleased himself, and pleasing his companions; where there was no      
interruption, tediousness, heat, or difference of sentiments. They          
have a notion that when people are met together, a silence does much        
improve conversation: this I found to be true; for during those little      
intermissions of talk, new ideas would arise in their thoughts,             
which very much enlivened the discourse. Their subjects are                 
generally on friendship and benevolence, or order and economy;              
sometimes upon the visible operations of nature, or ancient                 
traditions; upon the bounds and limits of virtue; upon the unerring         
rules of reason, or upon some determinations to be taken at the next        
great assembly; and often upon the various excellencies of poetry. I        
may add without vanity that my presence often gave them sufficient          
matter for discourse, because it afforded my master an occasion of          
letting his friends into the history of me and my country, upon             
which they were all pleased to descant in a manner not very                 
advantageous to human kind; and for that reason I shall not repeat          
what they said: only I may be allowed to observe that his Honor, to my      
great admiration, appeared to understand the nature of Yahoos in all        
countries much better than myself. He went through all our vices and        
follies, and discovered many which I had never mentioned to him, by         
only supposing what qualities a Yahoo of their country, with a small        
proportion of reason, might be capable of exerting; and concluded,          
with too much probability, how vile as well as miserable such a             
creature must be.                                                           
  I freely confess that all the little knowledge I have of any value        
was acquired by the lectures I received from my master, and from            
hearing the discourses of him and his friends; to which I should be         
prouder to listen than to dictate to the greatest and wisest                
assembly in Europe. I admired the strength, comeliness, and speed of        
the inhabitants; and such a constellation of virtues in such amiable        
persons produced in me the highest veneration. At first, indeed, I did      
not feel that natural awe which the Yahoos and all other animals            
bear towards them; but it grew upon me by degrees, much sooner than         
I imagined, and was mingled with a respectful love and gratitude, that      
they would condescend to distinguish me from the rest of my species.        
  When I thought of my family, my friends, my countrymen, or human          
race in general, I considered them as they really were, Yahoos in           
shape and disposition, perhaps a little more civilized, and                 
qualified with the gift of speech, but making no other use of reason        
than to improve and multiply those vices whereof their brethren in          
this country had only the share that nature allotted them. When I           
happened to behold the reflection of my own form in a lake or               
fountain, I turned away my face in horror and detestation of myself,        
and could better endure the sight of a common Yahoo than of my own          
person. By conversing with the Houyhnhnms, and looking upon them            
with delight, I fell to imitate their gait and gesture, which is now        
grown into an habit, and my friends often tell me in a blunt way, that      
I trot like a horse; which, however, I take for a great compliment.         
Neither shall I disown that in speaking I am apt to fall into the           
voice and manner of the Houyhnhnms, and hear myself ridiculed on            
that account without the least mortification.                               
  In the midst of all this happiness, and when I looked upon myself to      
be fully settled for life, my master sent for me one morning a              
little earlier than his usual hour. I observed by his countenance that      
he was in some perplexity, and at a loss how to begin what he had to        
speak. After a short silence he told me he did not know how I would         
take what he was going to say; that in the last general assembly, when      
the affair of the Yahoos was entered upon, the representatives had          
taken offense at his keeping a Yahoo (meaning myself) in his family         
more like a Houyhnhnm than a brute animal. That he was known                
frequently to converse with me, as if he could receive some                 
advantage or pleasure in my company; that such a practice was not           
agreeable to reason or nature, nor a thing ever heard of before             
among them. The assembly did therefore exhort him, either to employ me      
like the rest of my species, or command me to swim back to the place        
from where I came. That the first of these expedients was utterly           
rejected by all the Houyhnhnms who had ever seen me at his house or         
their own: for they alleged that because I had some rudiments of            
reason, added to the natural pravity of those animals, it was to be         
feared I might be able to seduce them into the woody and mountainous        
parts of the country, and bring them in troops by night to destroy the      
Houyhnhnms cattle, as being naturally of the ravenous kind, and averse      
from labor.                                                                 
                                                    {P_4|CH_10 ^paragraph 5}
  My master added that he was daily pressed by the Houyhnhnms of the        
neighborhood to have the assembly's exhortation executed, which he          
could not put off much longer. He doubted it would be impossible for        
me to swim to another country, and therefore wished I would contrive        
some sort of vehicle resembling those I had described to him, that          
might carry me on the sea; in which work I should have the                  
assistance of his own servants, as well as those of his neighbors.          
He concluded that for his own part he could have been content to            
keep me in his service as long as I lived; because he found I had           
cured myself of some bad habits and dispositions, by endeavoring, as        
far as my inferior nature was capable, to imitate the Houyhnhnms.           
  I should here observe to the reader, that a decree of the general         
assembly in this country is expressed by the word hnhloayn, which           
signifies an exhortation, as near as I can render it; for they have no      
conception how a rational creature can be compelled, but only               
advised or exhorted, because no person can disobey reason without           
giving up his claim to be a rational creature.                              
  I was struck with the utmost grief and despair at my master's             
discourse, and being unable to support the agonies I was under, I fell      
into a swoon at his feet; when I came to myself he told me that he          
concluded I had been dead (for these people are subject to no such          
imbecilities of nature). I answered in a faint voice that death             
would have been too great a happiness; that although I could not blame      
the assembly's exhortation, or the urgency of his friends, yet, in          
my weak and corrupt judgment, I thought it might consist with reason        
to have been less rigorous. That I could not swim a league, and             
probably the nearest land to theirs might be distant above a                
hundred; that many materials necessary for making a small vessel to         
carry me off, were wholly wanting in this country, which, however, I        
would attempt in obedience and gratitude to his Honor, although I           
concluded the thing to be impossible, and therefore looked on myself        
as already devoted to destruction. That the certain prospect of an          
unnatural death was the least of my evils; for supposing I should           
escape with life by some strange adventure, how could I think with          
temper of passing my days among Yahoos, and relapsing into my old           
corruptions, for want of examples to lead and keep me within the paths      
of virtue? That I knew too well upon what solid reasons all the             
determinations of the wise Houyhnhnms were founded, not to be shaken        
by arguments of mine, a miserable Yahoo; and therefore, after               
presenting him with my humble thanks for the offer of his servants'         
assistance in making a vessel, and desiring a reasonable time for so        
difficult a work, I told him I would endeavor to preserve a wretched        
being; and if ever I returned to England, was not without hopes of          
being useful to my own species by celebrating the praises of the            
renowned Houyhnhnms, and proposing their virtues to the imitation of        
mankind.                                                                    
  My master in a few words made me a very gracious reply, allowed me        
the space of two months to finish my boat; and ordered the sorrel nag,      
my fellow servant (for so this distance I may presume to call him)          
to follow my instructions, because I told my master that his help           
would be sufficient, and I knew he had a tenderness for me.                 
  In his company my first business was to go to that part of the coast      
where my rebellious crew had ordered me to be set on shore. I got upon      
a height, and looking on every side into the sea, fancied I saw a           
small island towards the northeast: I took out my pocket-glass, and         
could then clearly distinguish it about five leagues off, as I              
computed; but it appeared to the sorrel nag to be only a blue cloud;        
for as he had no conception of any country beside his own, so he could      
not be as expert in distinguishing remote objects at sea as we who          
so much converse in that element.                                           
                                                   {P_4|CH_10 ^paragraph 10}
  After I had discovered this island, I considered no farther; but          
resolved it should, if possible, be the first place of my                   
banishment, leaving the consequence to fortune.                             
  I returned home, and consulting with the sorrel nag, we went into         
a copse at some distance, where I with my knife, and he with a sharp        
flint fastened very artificially after their manner to a wooden             
handle, cut down several oak wattles about the thickness of a               
walking-staff, and some larger pieces. But I shall not trouble the          
reader with a particular description of my own mechanics; let it            
suffice to say that in six weeks time, with the help of the sorrel          
nag, who performed the parts that required most labor, I finished a         
sort of Indian canoe, but much larger, covering it with the skins of        
Yahoos well stitched together, with hempen threads of my own making.        
My sail was likewise composed of the skins of the same animal; but I        
made use of the youngest I could get, the older being too tough and         
thick; and I likewise provided myself with four paddles. I laid in a        
stock of boiled flesh, of rabbits and fowls, and took with me two           
vessels, one fined with milk and the other with water.                      
  I tried my canoe in a large pond near my master's house, and then         
corrected in it what was amiss; stopping all the chinks with Yahoos'        
tallow, till I found it staunch, and able to bear me and my freight.        
And when it was as complete as I could possibly make it, I had it           
drawn on a carriage very gently by Yahoos to the seaside, under the         
conduct of the sorrel nag and another servant.                              
-                                                                           
  When all was ready, and the day came for my departure, I took             
leave of my master and lady and the whole family, my eyes flowing with      
tears, and my heart quite sunk with grief. But his Honor, out of            
curiosity, and perhaps (if I may speak it without vanity) partly out        
of kindness, was determined to see me in my canoe, and got several          
of his neighboring friends to accompany him. I was forced to wait           
above an hour for the tide, and then observing the wind very                
fortunately bearing towards the island to which I intended to steer my      
course, I took a second leave of my master; but as I was going to           
prostrate myself to kiss his hoof, he did me the honor to raise it          
gently to my mouth. I am not ignorant how much I have been censured         
for mentioning this last particular. For my detractors are pleased          
to think it improbable that so illustrious a person should descend          
to give so great a mark of distinction to a creature so inferior as I.      
Neither have I forgot how apt some travelers are to boast of                
extraordinary favors they have received. But if these censurers were        
better acquainted with the noble and courteous disposition of the           
Houyhnhnms, they would soon change their opinion.                           
                                                   {P_4|CH_10 ^paragraph 15}
  I paid my respects to the rest of the Houyhnhnms in his Honor's           
company; then getting into my canoe, I pushed off from shore.               
                                                                            
P_4|CH_11                                                                   
  CHAPTER XI                                                                
-                                                                           
  I began this desperate voyage on February 15, 1714-5, at 9 o'clock        
in the morning. The wind was very favorable; however, I made use at         
first only of my paddles; but considering I should soon be weary,           
and that the wind might chop about, I ventured set up my little             
sail; and thus with the help of the tide I went at the rate of a            
league and a half an hour, as near as I could guess. My master and his      
friends continued on the shore till I was almost out of sight; and I        
often heard the sorrel nag (who always loved me) crying out, Hnuy illa      
nyha majah Yahoo, Take care of thyself, gentle Yahoo.                       
  My design was, if possible, to discover some small island                 
uninhabited, yet sufficient by my labor to furnish me with the              
necessaries of life, which I would have thought a greater happiness         
than to be first minister in the politest court of Europe; so horrible      
was the idea I conceived of returning to live in the society and under      
the government of Yahoos. For in such a solitude as I desired I             
could at least enjoy my own thoughts, and reflect with delight on           
the virtues of those inimitable Houyhnhnms, without any opportunity of      
degenerating into the vices and corruptions of my own species.              
  The reader may remember what I related when my crew conspired             
against me and confined me to my cabin. How I continued there               
several weeks without knowing what course we took; and when I was           
put ashore in the long-boat, how the sailors told me with oaths,            
whether true or false, that not in what part of the world we were.          
However, I did then believe us to be about ten degrees southward of         
the Cape of Good Hope, or about 45'degrees souther latitude, as I           
gathered from some general words I overheard among them, being I            
supposed to the southeast in their intended voyage to Madagascar.           
And although this were but little better than conjecture, I resolved        
to steer my course eastward, hoping to reach the south-west coast of        
New Holland, and perhaps some such island as I desired, lying westward      
of it. The wind was full west, and by six in the evening I computed         
I had gone eastward at least eighteen leagues, when I spied a very          
small island about half a league off, which I soon reached. It was          
nothing but a rock, with one creek, naturally arched by the force of        
tempests. Here I put in my canoe, and climbing up a part of the             
rock, I could plainly discover land to the east, extending from             
south to north. I lay all night in my canoe; and repeating my voyage        
early in the morning, I arrived in seven hours to the south-east point      
of New Holland. This confirmed me in the opinion I have long                
entertained, that the maps and charts place this country at least           
three degrees more to the east than it really is; which thought I           
communicated many years ago to my worthy friend Mr. Herman Moll, and        
gave him my reasons for it, although he has rather chosen to follow         
other authors.                                                              
  I saw no inhabitants in the place where I landed, and being unarmed,      
I was afraid of venturing far into the country. I found some shellfish      
on the shore, and ate them raw, not daring to kindle a fire, for            
fear of being discovered by the natives. I continued three days             
feeding on oysters and limpets, to save my own provisions; and I            
fortunately found a brook of excellent water, which gave me great           
relief.                                                                     
  On the fourth day, venturing out early a little too far, I saw            
twenty or thirty natives upon a height, not above five hundred yards        
from me. They were stark naked, men, women, and children, round a           
fire, as I could discover by the smoke. One of them spied me, and gave      
notice to the rest; five of them advanced towards me, leaving the           
women and children at the fire. I made what haste I could to the            
shore, and getting into my canoe, shoved off: the savages observing me      
retreat, ran after me; and before I could get far enough into the sea,      
discharged an arrow, which wounded me deeply on the inside of my            
left knee (I shall carry the mark to my grave). I apprehended the           
arrow might be poisoned, and paddling out of the reach of their             
darts (being a calm day), I made a shift to suck the wound and dress        
it as well as I could.                                                      
                                                    {P_4|CH_11 ^paragraph 5}
  I was at a loss what to do, for I durst not return to the same            
landing-place, but stood to the north, and was forced to paddle; for        
the wind, though very gentle, was against me, blowing northwest. As         
I was looking about for a secure landing-place, I saw a sail to the         
north-northeast, which appearing every minute more visible, I was in        
some doubt whether I should wait for them or no; but at last my             
detestation of the Yahoo race prevailed, and turning my canoe, I            
sailed and paddled together to the south, and got into the same             
creek from whence I set out in the morning, choosing rather to trust        
myself among these barbarians, than live with European Yahoos. I            
drew up my canoe as close as I could to the shore, and hid myself           
behind a stone by the little brook, which, as I have already said, was      
excellent water.                                                            
  The ship came within half a league of this creek, and sent her            
long-boat with vessels to take in fresh water (for the place it             
seems was very well known), but I did not observe it till the boat was      
almost on shore, and it was too late to seek another hiding-place. The      
seamen at their landing observed my canoe, and rummaging it all             
over, easily conjectured that the owner could not be far off. Four          
of them well armed searched every cranny and lurking-hole, till at          
last they found me flat on my face behind the stone. They gazed awhile      
in admiration at my strange uncouth dress, my coat made of skins, my        
wooden-soled shoes, and my furred stockings; from whence, however,          
they concluded I was not a native of the place, who all go naked.           
One of the seamen in Portuguese bid me rise, and asked who I was. I         
understood that language very well, and getting upon feet, said I           
was a poor Yahoo, banished from the Houyhnhnms, and desired they would      
please to let me depart. They admired to hear me answer them in             
their own tongue, and saw by my complexion I must be a European, but        
were at a loss to know what I meant by Yahoos and Houyhnhnms, and at        
the same time fell a laughing at my strange tone in speaking, which         
resembled the neighing of a horse. I trembled all the while between         
fear and hatred: I again desired leave to depart, and was gently            
moving to my canoe; but they laid hold of me, desiring to know what         
country I was of, whence I came, with many other questions. I told          
them I was born in England, from whence I came about five years ago,        
and then their country and ours were at peace. I therefore hoped            
they would not treat me as an enemy, since I meant them no harm, but        
was a poor Yahoo, seeking some desolate place where to pass the             
remainder of his unfortunate life.                                          
  When they began to talk, I thought I never heard or saw any thing so      
unnatural; for it appeared to me as dog or a cow should speak in            
England, or a Yahoo in Houyhnhnm-land The honest Portuguese were            
equally amazed at my strange dress, and the odd manner of delivering        
my words, which however they understood very well. They spoke to me         
with great humanity, and said they were sure the Captain would carry        
me gratis to Lisbon, from whence I might return to my own country;          
that two of the seamen would go back to the ship, inform the Captain        
of what they had seen, and receive his order; in the mean time, unless      
I would give my solemn oath not to fly, they would secure me by force.      
I thought it best to comply with their proposal. They were very             
curious to know my story, but I gave them very little satisfaction;         
and they all conjectured my misfortunes had impaired my reason. In two      
hours the boat, which went laden with vessels of water, returned            
with the Captain's command to fetch me on board. I fell on my knees to      
preserve my liberty; but all was in vain, and the men having tied me        
with cords, heaved me into the boat, from whence I was taken into           
the ship, and from thence into the Captain's cabin.                         
  His name was Pedro de Mendez; he was a very courteous and generous        
person; he entreated me to give some account of myself, and desired to      
know what I would eat or drink; said I should be used as well as            
himself, and spoke so many obliging things, that I wondered to find         
such civilities from a Yahoo. However, I remained silent and sullen; I      
was ready to faint at the very smell of him and his men. At last I          
desired something to eat out of my own canoe; but he ordered me a           
chicken and some excellent wine, and then directed that I should be         
put to bed in a very clean cabin. I would not undress myself, but           
lay on the bed-clothes, and in half an hour stole out, when I               
thought the crew was at dinner, and getting to the side of the ship         
was going to leap into the sea, and swim for my life, rather than           
continue among Yahoos. But one of the seamen prevented me, and              
having informed the Captain, I was chained to my cabin.                     
  After dinner Don Pedro came to me, and desired to know my reason for      
so desperate an attempt, assured me he only meant to do me all the          
service he was able, and spoke so very movingly, that at last I             
descended to treat him like an animal which had some little portion of      
reason. I gave him a very short relation of my voyage, of the               
conspiracy against me by own men, of the country where they set me          
on shore, and of my three years residence there. All which he looked        
upon as if it were a dream or a vision; whereat I took great                
offense, for I had quite forgotten the faculty of lying, so peculiar        
to Yahoos in all countries where they preside, and, consequently the        
disposition of suspecting truth in others of their own I asked him          
whether it were the custom in his country to say the thing that was         
not. I assured him I had almost forgotten what he meant by                  
falsehood, and if I had lived a thousand years in Houyhnhnm-land, I         
should never have heard a lie from the meanest servant, that I was          
altogether indifferent whether he believed me or not, but however,          
in return for his favors, I would give so much allowance to the             
corruption of his nature as to answer any objection he would please to      
make, and then he might easily discover the truth.                          
                                                   {P_4|CH_11 ^paragraph 10}
  The Captain, a wise man, after many endeavors to catch me tripping        
in some part of my story, at last began to have a better opinion of my      
veracity, and the rather, because he confessed he met with a Dutch          
skipper, who pretended to have landed with five others of his crew          
upon a certain island or continent south of New Holland, where they         
went for fresh water, and observed a horse driving before him               
several animals exactly resembling those I described under the name of      
Yahoos, with some other particulars, which the Captain said he had          
forgotten; because he then concluded them all to be lies. But he added      
that since I professed so inviolable an attachment to truth, I must         
give him my word of honor to bear him company in this voyage,               
without attempting any thing against my life, or else he would              
continue me a prisoner till we arrived at Lisbon. I gave him the            
promise he required, but at the same time protested that I would            
suffer the greatest hardships rather than return to live among Yahoos.      
  Our voyage passed without any considerable accident. In gratitude to      
the Captain I sometimes sat with him at his earnest request, and            
strove to conceal my antipathy to human kind, although it often             
broke out, which he suffered to pass without observation. But the           
greatest part of the day I confined myself to my cabin, to avoid            
seeing any of the crew. The Captain had often entreated me to strip         
myself of my savage dress, and offered to lend me the best suit of          
clothes he had. This I would not be prevailed on to accept,                 
abhorring to cover myself with any thing that had been on the back          
of a Yahoo. I only desired he would lend me two clean shirts, which         
having been washed since he wore them, I believed would not so much         
defile me. These I changed every second day, and washed them myself.        
  We arrived at Lisbon, Nov. 5, 1715. At our landing the Captain            
forced me to cover myself with his cloak, to prevent the rabble from        
crowding about me. I was conveyed to his own house, and at my               
earnest request he led me up to the highest room backwards. I conjured      
him to conceal from all persons what I had told him of the Houyhnhnms,      
because the least hint of such a story would not only draw numbers          
of people to see me, but probably put me in danger of being                 
imprisoned, or burned by the Inquisition. The Captain persuaded me          
to accept a suit of clothes newly made; but I would not suffer the          
tailor to take my measure; however, Don Pedro being almost of my size,      
they fitted me well enough. He accoutred me with other necessaries all      
new, which I aired for twenty-four hours before I would use them.           
  The Captain had no wife, nor above three servants, none of which          
were suffered to attend at meals, and his whole deportment was so           
obliging, added to very good human understanding, that I really             
began to tolerate his company. He gained so far upon me that I              
ventured to look out of the back window. By degrees I was brought into      
another room, from whence I peeped into the street, but drew my head        
back in a fright. In a week's time he seduced me down to the door. I        
found my terror gradually lessened, but my hatred and contempt              
seemed to increase. I was at last bold enough to walk the street in         
his company, but kept my nose well stopped with rue, or sometimes with      
tobacco.                                                                    
  In ten days Don Pedro, to whom I had given some account of my             
domestic affairs, put it upon me as a matter of honor and                   
conscience, that I ought to return to my native country, and live at        
home with my wife and children. He told me there was an English ship        
in the port just ready to sail, and he would furnish me with all            
things necessary. It would be tedious to repeat his arguments, and          
my contradictions. He said it was altogether impossible to find such a      
solitary island as I had desired to live in; but I might command in my      
own house, and pass my time in a manner as recluse as I pleased.            
                                                   {P_4|CH_11 ^paragraph 15}
  I complied at last, finding I could not do better. I left Lisbon the      
24th day of November, in an English merchantman, but who was the            
master I never inquired. Don Pedro accompanied me to the ship, and          
lent me twenty pounds. He took kind leave of me, and embraced me at         
parting, which I bore as well as I could. During this last voyage I         
had no commerce with the master or any of his men; but pretending I         
was sick, kept close in my cabin. On the fifth of December, 1715, we        
cast anchor in the Downs about nine in the morning, and at three in         
the afternoon I got safe to my house at Rotherhith.                         
  My wife and family received me with great surprise and joy,               
because they concluded me certainly dead; but I must freely confess         
the sight of them filled me only with hatred, disgust, and contempt,        
and the more by reflecting on the near alliance I had to them. For          
although since my unfortunate exile from the Houyhnhnm country, I           
had compelled myself to tolerate the sight of Yahoos, and to                
converse with Don Pedro de Mendez, yet my memory and imagination            
were perpetually filled with the virtues and ideas of those exalted         
Houyhnhnms. And when I began to consider that by copulating with one        
of the Yahoo species I had become a parent of more, it struck me            
with the utmost shame, confusion, and horror.                               
  As soon as I entered the house, my wife took me in her arms and           
kissed me, at which, having not been used to the touch of that              
odious animal for so many years, I fell in a swoon for almost an hour.      
At the time I am writing it is five years since my last return to           
England: during the first year I could not endure my wife or                
children in my presence, the very smell of them was intolerable,            
much less could I suffer them to eat in the same room. To this hour         
they dare not presume to touch my bread, or drink out of the same cup,      
neither was I ever able to let one of them take me by the hand. The         
first money I laid out was to buy two young stone-horses, which I keep      
in a good stable, and next to them the groom is my greatest                 
favorite; for I feel my spirits revived by the smell he contracts in        
the stable. My horses understand me tolerably well; I converse with         
them at least four hours every day. They are strangers to bridle or         
saddle; they live in great amity with me, and friendship to each            
other.                                                                      
                                                                            
P_4|CH_12                                                                   
  CHAPTER XII                                                               
-                                                                           
  Thus, gentle reader, I have given thee faithful history of my             
travels for sixteen years and above seven months; wherein I have not        
been so studious of ornament as truth. I could perhaps like others          
have astonished you with strange improbable tales; but I rather             
chose to relate plain matter of fact in the simplest manner and style;      
because my principal design was to inform, and not to amuse you.            
  It is easy for us who travel into remote countries, which are seldom      
visited by Englishmen or other Europeans, to form descriptions of           
wonderful animals both at sea and land. Whereas a traveler's chief aim      
should be to make men wiser and better, and to improve their minds          
by the bad as well as good example of what they deliver concerning          
foreign places.                                                             
  I could heartily wish a law was enacted, that every traveler, before      
he were permitted to publish his voyages, should be obliged to make         
oath before the Lord High Chancellor that all he intended to print was      
absolutely true to the best of his knowledge; for then the world would      
no longer be deceived as it usually is, while some writers, to make         
their works pass the better upon the public, impose the grossest            
falsities on the unwary reader. I have perused several books of             
travels with great delight in my younger days; but having since gone        
over most parts of the globe, and been able to contradict many              
fabulous accounts from my own observation, it has given me a great          
disgust against this part of reading, and some indignation to see           
the credulity of mankind so impudently abused. Therefore since my           
acquaintances were pleased to think my poor endeavors might not be          
unacceptable to my country, I imposed on myself as a maxim, never to        
be swerved from, that I would strictly adhere to truth; neither indeed      
can I be ever under the least temptation to vary from it, while I           
retain in my mind the lectures and example of my noble master, and the      
other illustrious Houyhnhnms, of whom I had so long the honor to be         
a humble bearer.                                                            
-                                                                           
      ---Nec si miserum Fortuna Sinonem                                     
                                                    {P_4|CH_12 ^paragraph 5}
      Finxit, vanum etiam, mendacemque improba finget.                      
-                                                                           
  I know very well how little reputation is to be gotten by writings        
which require neither genius nor learning, nor indeed any other             
talent, except a good memory or an exact journal. I know likewise that      
writers of travels, like dictionary-makers, are sunk into oblivion          
by the weight and bulk of those who come after, and therefore lie           
uppermost. And it is highly probable that such travelers who shall          
hereafter visit the countries described in this work of mine, may,          
by detecting my errors (if there be any), and adding many new               
discoveries of their own, jostle me out of vogue, and stand in my           
place, making the world forget that I was ever an author. This              
indeed would be too great a mortification if I wrote for fame: but, as      
my sole intention was the PUBLIC GOOD, I cannot be altogether               
disappointed. For who can read of the virtues I have mentioned in           
the glorious Houyhnhnms, without being ashamed of his own vices,            
when he considers himself as the reasoning, governing animal of his         
country? I shall say nothing of those remote nations where Yahoos           
preside; amongst which the least corrupted are the Brobdingnagians,         
whose wise maxims in morality and government it would be our happiness      
to observe. But I forbear descanting farther, and rather leave the          
judicious reader to own remarks and applications.                           
  I am not a little pleased that this work of mine can possibly meet        
with no censurers: for what objections can be made against a writer         
who relates only plain facts that happened in such distant                  
countries, where we have not the least interest with respect either to      
trade or negotiations? I have carefully avoided every fault with which      
common writers of travels are often too justly charged. Besides, I          
meddle not the least with any party, but write without passion,             
prejudice, or illwill against any man or number of men whatsoever. I        
write for the noblest end, to inform and instruct mankind, over whom I      
may, without breach of modesty, pretend to some superiority, from           
the advantages I received by conversing so long among the most              
accomplished Houyhnhnms. I write without any view towards profit or         
praise. I never suffer a word to pass that may look like reflection,        
or possibly give the least offence even to those who are most ready to      
take it. So that I hope I may with justice pronounce myself an              
author perfectly blameless, against whom the tribes of answerers,           
considerers, observers, reflecters, detecters, remarkers, will never        
be able to find matter for exercising their talents.                        
  I confess it was whispered to me that I was bound in duty as a            
subject of England to have given in a memorial to a Secretary of State      
at my first coming over; because whatever lands are discovered by a         
subject belong to the Crown. But I doubt whether our conquests in           
the countries I treat of, would be as easy as those of Ferdinando           
Cortez over the naked Americans. The Lilliputians I think are hardly        
worth the charge of a fleet and army to reduce them; and I question         
whether it might be prudent or safe to attempt the Brobdingnagians; or      
whether an English army would be much at their ease with the Flying         
Island over their heads. The Houyhnhnms, indeed, appear not to be so        
well prepared for war, a science to which they are perfect                  
strangers, and especially against missive weapons. However,                 
supposing myself to be a minister of state, I could never give my           
advice for invading them. Their prudence, unanimity,                        
unacquaintedness with fear, and their love of their country, would          
amply supply all defects in the military art. Imagine twenty                
thousand of them breaking into the midst of a European army,                
confounding the confounding the ranks, overturning the carriages,           
battering the warriors' faces into mummy by terrible yerks from             
their hinder hoofs. For they would well deserve the character given to      
Augustus: Recalcitrat unclique tutus. But instead of proposals for          
conquering that magnanimous nation, I rather wish they were in a            
capacity or disposition to send a number of their inhabitants for           
civilizing Europe, by teaching us the first principles of honor,            
truth, temperance, public spirit, fortitude, chastity, benevolence,         
and fidelity. The names of all which virtues are still retained             
among us in languages, and are to be met with in modern as well as          
ancient which I am able to assert from my own small reading.                
                                                   {P_4|CH_12 ^paragraph 10}
  But I had another reason which made me less forward to enlarge his        
Majesty's dominions by my discoveries. To say the truth, I had              
conceived a few scruples with relation to the distributive justice          
of princes upon those occasions. For instance, a crew of pirates are        
driven by a storm they know not whither, at length a boy discovers          
land from the topmast, they go on shore to rob and plunder, they see a      
harmless people, are entertained with kindness, they give the               
country a new name, they take formal possession of it for their             
King, they set up a rotten plank or a stone for a memorial, they            
murder two or three dozen of the natives, bring away a couple more          
by force for a sample, return home, and get their pardon. Here              
commences a new dominion acquired with a title by divine right.             
Ships are sent with the first opportunity, the natives driven out or        
destroyed, their princes tortured to discover their gold, a free            
license given to all acts of inhumanity and lust, the earth reeking         
with the blood of its inhabitants: and this execrable crew of butchers      
employed in so pious an expedition, is a modern colony sent to convert      
and civilize an idolatrous and barbarous people.                            
  But this description, I confess, does by no means affect the British      
nation, who may be an example to the whole world for their wisdom,          
care, and justice in planting colonies; their liberal endowments for        
the advancement of religion and learning; their choice of devout and        
able pastors to propagate Christianity; their caution in stocking           
their provinces with people of sober lives and conversations from this      
the mother kingdom; their strict regard to the distribution of              
justice, in supplying the civil administration through all their            
colonies with officers of the greatest abilities, utter strangers to        
corruption; and to crown all, by sending the most vigilant and              
virtuous governors, who have no other views than the happiness of           
the people over whom they preside, and the honor of the King their          
master.                                                                     
  But, as those countries which I have described do not appear to have      
any desire of being conquered, and enslaved, murdered or driven out by      
colonies, nor abound either in gold, silver, sugar, or tobacco; I           
did humbly conceive they were by no means proper objects of our             
zeal, our valor, or our interest. However, if those whom it more            
concerns think fit to be of another opinion, I am ready to depose,          
when I shall be lawfully called, that no European did ever visit these      
countries before me. I mean, if the inhabitants ought to he                 
believed; unless a dispute may arise about the two Yahoos, said to          
have been seen many ages ago in a mountain in Houyhnhnm-land, from          
whence the opinion is, that the race of those brutes has descended;         
and these, for anything I know, may have been English, which indeed         
I was apt to suspect from the lineaments of their posterity's               
countenances, although very much defaced. But, how far that will go to      
make out a title, I leave to the learned in colony-law.                     
  But as to the formality of taking possession in my Sovereign's name,      
it never came once into my thoughts; and if it had, yet as my               
affairs then stood, I should perhaps in point of prudence and               
self-preservation have put it off to a better opportunity.                  
  Having thus answered the only objection that can ever be raised           
against me as a traveler, I here take a final leave of all my               
courteous readers, and return to enjoy my own speculations in my            
little garden at Redriff, to apply those excellent lessons of virtue        
which I learned among the Houyhnhnms, to instruct the Yahoos of my own      
family as far as I shall find them docile animals; to behold my figure      
often in a glass, and thus if possible habituate myself by time to          
tolerate the sight of a human creature; to lament the brutality of          
Houyhnhnms in my own country, but always treat their persons with           
respect, for the sake of my noble master, his family, his friends, and      
the whole Houyhnhnm race, whom these ours have the honor to resemble        
in all their lineaments, however their intellectuals came to                
degenerate.                                                                 
                                                   {P_4|CH_12 ^paragraph 15}
  I began last week to permit my wife to sit at dinner with me, at the      
farthest end of a long table, and to answer (but with the utmost            
brevity) the few questions I ask her. Yet the smell of a Yahoo              
continuing very offensive, I always keep my nose well stopped with          
rue, lavender, or tobacco leaves. And although it be hard for a man         
late in life to remove old habits, I am not altogether out of hopes in      
some time to suffer a neighbor Yahoo in my company, without the             
apprehensions I am yet under of his teeth or his claws.                     
  My reconcilement to the Yahoo-kind in general might not be so             
difficult, if they would be content with those vices and follies            
only which nature has entitled them to. I am not in the least provoked      
at the sight of a lawyer, a pick-pocket, a colonel, a fool, a lord,         
a gamester, a politician, a whore-master, a physician, an evidence,         
a suborner, an attorney, a traitor, or the like; this is all according      
to the due course of things: but when I behold a lump of deformity and      
diseases both in body and mind, smitten with pride, it immediately          
breaks all the measures of my patience; neither shall I be ever able        
to comprehend how such an animal and such a vice could tally together.      
The wise and virtuous Houyhnhnms, who abound in all excellencies            
that can adorn a rational creature, have no name for this vice in           
their language, which has no terms to express anything that is evil,        
except those whereby they describe the detestable qualities of their        
Yahoos, among which they were not able to distinguish this of pride,        
for want of thoroughly understanding human nature, as it shows              
itself in other countries, where that animal presides. But I, who           
had more experience, could plainly observe some rudiments of it             
among the wild Yahoos.                                                      
  But the Houyhnhnms, who live under the government of reason, are          
no more proud of the good qualities they possess, than I should be for      
not wanting a leg or an arm, which no man in his wits would boast           
of, although he must be miserable without them. I dwell the longer          
upon this subject from the desire I have to make the society of an          
English Yahoo by any means not insupportable; and therefore I here          
entreat those who have any tincture of this absurd vice, that they          
will not presume to come in my sight.                                       
-                                                                           
                             THE END                                        
                                                                            
                                                                            

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