132 lines
4.3 KiB
Plaintext
132 lines
4.3 KiB
Plaintext
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[]The Brady Bunch[]
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by Dick Cheese
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and Stu
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The Brady Bunch was a really great
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tv show in the swinging 70's. Yet, its
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ramifications have been sorely mis-
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calculated. For example, how many of
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you know that the episode in which
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Marsha didn't want to go to school was
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the main influence upon the outcome of
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the 1980 Presidental Election? And how
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many of you still remember the day in
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1977 in which tree houses above 30'
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were outlawed after the airing of the
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episode in which Bobby fell from a
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perilous climb? Well, the Brady Bunch
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has had such a profound influence upon
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Stu and me that we wish to do it
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justice in this G file. Oh yea, for
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your information, this system is being
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run in an architecht's den that was
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converted to a psychedelic 'pad'. The
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decision to do this was result of
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the rerun of the episode in which Greg
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converted Mike's den into his own
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swingin' crash pad.
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One of our favorite episodes is the
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one in which Bobby tries to win some
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sort of prize, and eventually gets on
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the hip program "Kartoon King!" This is
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an avant-gard show, for it really lets
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us probe the inner recesses of Bobby
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Brady's psyche. We like the scene in
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which the fat kid, like the slovenly
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pig he is, eats the ice cream first,
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and we are left with a shot of a
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crushed and humiliated Bobby with ice
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cream on his nose. Hilarous!
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The scene could have been inproved,
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says Stu, if Kartoon King said some-
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thing to Bobby like, "Hey kid. Looks
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like your parents got stuck with a
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2 timing jerk and a 3 time loser for
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a son!" Then two strongarms would
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clap his ears and dump sludge down the
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seat of his pants.
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Dick Cheese and Stu now present some
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opinions on various episodes of The
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Brady Bunch:
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1] The episode in which Greg falls in
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love with his teacher.
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Dick: Loved it! But the teacher should
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have had REAL big tits!
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Stu: A S&M scene would have made it a
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perfect show!
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2] The episode that has Cindy thinking
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she was going to be the new Shirley
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Temple.
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Dick: Super! I wouldn't change a thing!
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Stu: And how!
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3] The episode in which Marsha holds a slumber party.
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Dick: A good show, but lacking one
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particular element. The element was
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realism. The itching powder gag was
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a good concept, but it never really
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got off the ground. This episode must
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have been written during a writers
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strike.
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Stu: I agree, but a lesbian scene
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would have been nice.
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4] The episode in which Bobby had a
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greater pull-up ratio than Greg, so
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Greg became the first white slave.
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Dick: The original "underdog" story.
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Bobby, being the "underdog" and Greg
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being the "heavy". Rocky, The Karate
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Kid, Vision Quest are all dispace-
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ments of this superb story.
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Stu: It had me cheering, but I think
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that if Bobby did soooo many pull-ups,
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his forearms should have looked like
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Popey's in the next episode.
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5] The show which had the Brady's
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become a musical group.
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Dick: This one had me dancing in my
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seat! The Brady's were nothing short
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of superb! I call them the Jackson's of
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the 70's!
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Stu: The music community lost a great
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talent when the Brady kids stuck with
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tv, and eventually saw their carreers
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go down the toilet.
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6] The show in which the Brady family
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took a family trip to the Grand
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Canyon.
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Dick: The best miniseries I've ever
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seen, except the reason this one
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didn't win the Emmy was the scene in
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which Bobby and Cindy gave baked beans
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to a little indian lad in a flashlight.
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Let's be serious folks, how many of
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you would eat baked beans out of a
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flashlight. You know the acid residue
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woudl have given the boy some sort of
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gastric disorders. Poor planning on
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behalf of the writers guild. One could
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easily mistake this scene for Bobby
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and Cindy just trying to harm the
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minority member. Some might mistake
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this for a racial slur. Thought that
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the scene in which they all tied
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articles of clothing together to get
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the keys was very novel!
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Stu: I agree, but I don't think you
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have really scratched the surface on
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Alice's role in this show. Alice, off
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camera, made a sick joke in which she
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called the indian boy a "sad excuse
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for the human." Perhaps this is the
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answer to the great mystery: Why was
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Ann B. Davis removed from the show
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mid-season and to be replaced with a
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robot, never to be seen again. The
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Alice/Sam the butcher motif creeps up
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here.
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This will be discussed in part //...
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Dick Cheese Stu
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