142 lines
6.8 KiB
Plaintext
142 lines
6.8 KiB
Plaintext
|
||
|
||
|
||
|
||
ÜÜÜÜÜÜÜÜÜÜÜÜÜÜÜÜÜÜÜÜÜÜÜÜÜÜÜÜÜÜÜÜÜÜÜÜÜÜÜÜÜÜÜÜÜÜÜÜÜÜÜÜÜÜÜÜÜÜÜÜÜÜÜÜÜÜÜÜÜÜÜÜÜÜÜ
|
||
ݱ06 Apr 86±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±_ROR_-_ALUCARD_±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±Ý Þ°
|
||
Ý Ý A Þ°
|
||
Ý The Wedding of the Wood Nymph & Raistlin Ý Þ°
|
||
Ý Wedded on Peabody's Tomb A ßßßßß°
|
||
Ý Tfile Þ°
|
||
Ý Author: Shandor Distribution Þ°
|
||
ÜÜÜÜÜ Centere Þ°
|
||
Ý Þ (Wood Nymph / Aka: Muffled Screams) - RoR - Þ°
|
||
Ý A Þ_____________________________________________________________________Þ°
|
||
Ý Þ Shawn-Da-Lay Boy Productions, Inc.úúúúúúúúúúúúúúúúúúúúúúúúúúúúúúúúúúÞ°
|
||
ÝÜÜÜÞÜÜÜÜÜÜÜÜÜÜÜÜÜÜÜÜÜÜÜÜÜÜÜÜÜÜÜÜÜÜÜÜÜÜÜÜÜÜÜÜÜÜÜÜÜÜÜÜÜÜÜÜÜÜÜÜÜÜÜÜÜÜÜÜÜÜÜÜÜÞ°
|
||
°°°The°Pirates'°Hollow°-°415/236/2371°°The°Electric°Pub°-°415/236/4380°°°°
|
||
|
||
|
||
*@*@* Reading: Wedding
|
||
|
||
*---]]]]> (P)ause/(Q)uit <[[[[---*
|
||
|
||
|
||
|
||
As I approached the chapel, I knew that history was about to be made. Never
|
||
before had any adventurer actually pinned one of the elusive nymphs into
|
||
marriage. Nymphs are usually love em and leave 'em types.
|
||
Then I looked up and my thoughts were replaced with AWE. Before me, in the
|
||
fog, loomed THE CHURCH, carefully crafted of stone, wood, and metal, it
|
||
rose above the mist. Grinning stone gargoyles stared at me and then looked
|
||
away. Lightning flashed in the background, lighting the stained glass
|
||
windows momentarily, and giving the whole scene an eerie mood.
|
||
My swimfins plopped noisly on the wet ground, and I pushed my mask and
|
||
snorkel back onto my forehead.
|
||
Straightening my bowtie, and checking to see that my tux jacket and black
|
||
shorts were in order, I walked into the church's atrium. The doors to
|
||
the chapel stood open, and I peeked through before heading for the
|
||
dressing room.
|
||
Most of the wedding guests had arrived. Near the front, King Phillip and his
|
||
three loyal Nights sat decked in silk and jewels, swilling wine from golden
|
||
goblets. Allanon, Death Wish, Serper, and The Unnamable all looked quite
|
||
daper showing the late arrivals to seats while wearing black pants and
|
||
tux top t-shirts.
|
||
Walking around the back, I proceeded to the dressing rooms. There I found
|
||
Raistlin, dressing in his Black robes, and staring at the ceiling with his
|
||
hourglass eyes. "Well," said I, waking him from his reverie, "looks like the
|
||
big day is finally here. How did you ever decide to wed a nymph, anyway?"
|
||
"Ahh, it was the best choice I had," he replied, "Somebody who looks
|
||
youthful even through my eyes. Besides, I know where her tree is."
|
||
Music began to eminate from the walls.
|
||
"Well, this is it. All ready?"
|
||
"Yes, except for one thing. Have you got the ring?"
|
||
"Awww, how could I forget something like that?" I said, fishing in my
|
||
pocket. "It's right here.... somewhere"
|
||
There was a small flash in Raistlin's right hand and he chuckled, "Sorry, I
|
||
couldn't resist. Here you go." And he tossed me the ring. "Now, whatever
|
||
you do, don't put that on. It's specially enchanted, and I don't want
|
||
to be married to you, you know."
|
||
"Hey, no problem. Personally, I'd rather spend eternity in thrall to
|
||
a vampire."
|
||
We began our walk to the altar, and out of the corner of my eye, I caught
|
||
a glimpse of the nymph. AWOOOO!! I've never seen anybody wear bark and
|
||
leaves in quite that manner before, but I sure would like to see it again.
|
||
At the end of the walk, I saw Father Hawk, the minister. He had kind of an
|
||
etherial smile, but also had a look of "Well, God, what kind of joke are
|
||
You gonna play on me next." If you know what I mean.
|
||
Raistlin and I took our places, and looked back up the aisle. Cairo,
|
||
Chron, and Roach had begun their walk down the aisle, and I realized
|
||
that the music had changed just a bit.
|
||
I don't know if "Minnie the Moocher" it appropriate for most weddings, but it
|
||
seemed to fit perfectly in this case.
|
||
Donblas, Nymph's big brother, took her hand, and proceeded to walk down
|
||
the aisle with her to give her away in her father's absence. Whistles
|
||
came up from the crowd, but they were silenced quickly with stares from
|
||
both Father Hawkwind and Raistlin.
|
||
"Dearly beloved," began father Hawkwind, " we are gathered here today to
|
||
see this mage and this nymph wedded in holy matrimony.
|
||
And so on and so on....
|
||
"Do you Raistlin take Wood Nymph to be your lawfully wedded wife, to
|
||
honor and to charish, in sickness and health, for better or worse?
|
||
|
||
"And do you Wood Nymph take Raistlin to be your lawfully wedded husband
|
||
to honor and to charish, through sickness and health for better or for
|
||
worse?
|
||
|
||
|
||
A gleam came into Wood Nymph's eye. "Gee, I thought you'd never ask! Yes,
|
||
ok."
|
||
|
||
|
||
|
||
Raistlin looked up and said, "I dew, doo-doo, and do."
|
||
|
||
|
||
|
||
"So by the powers vested unto me by a case of acid indegestion and the
|
||
permanent state of insanity, I now pronounce you Mage and Nymph.
|
||
|
||
"What God hath joined, let no man put asunder.
|
||
|
||
"You may now kiss the bride.
|
||
|
||
|
||
|
||
|
||
|
||
"This is a reminder: I will be doing confessions afterwards and i will
|
||
be giving blessings.
|
||
|
||
|
||
Raistlin lifted Wood Nymph's leafy veil, and bent down to kiss her. Her arms
|
||
shot out and grabbed him around the neck, pulling him close. They kissed
|
||
passionately for a minute. Two minutes. Three minutes. Cmeras flashed,
|
||
and a little guy with a tweed jacket and a rumpled Fedora with a card
|
||
saying:
|
||
|
||
PRESS
|
||
Image Man
|
||
|
||
stuck in its band approached them to get a good closeup of Raistlin as he
|
||
gradually turned purple.
|
||
Finally, they broke their embrace, and amidst showers of rice and birth control
|
||
pills, they walked back up the aisle together.
|
||
Outside, the clouds had cleared, and a long green limo waited for them.
|
||
In the front sat Maud'dib, decked in his finest black stillsuit, and a leather
|
||
chauffer's cap.
|
||
They got in the back and the limo took off down the forest road with a squeal
|
||
of rubber. A sign on the back proclaimed "Just Married" and bells, shoes, and
|
||
tin cans bounced on the road, hanging from vines tied to the back bumper.
|
||
|
||
|
||
Call these other fine boards.....
|
||
-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-
|
||
-= The Legion Outpost.........................................415/521/7413 =-
|
||
-= C.A.M.E.L.O.T..............................................415/887/0983 =-
|
||
-= RAT HEAD...................................................415/524/3649 =-
|
||
-= International House Of Leeches.............................415/527/9444 =-
|
||
-= Lunatic Labs...............................................213/655/0691 =-
|
||
-= Skeleton Crue..............................................415/376/8060 =-
|
||
-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=- RoR - Alucard -=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-
|
||
|