62 lines
3.1 KiB
Plaintext
62 lines
3.1 KiB
Plaintext
BoddAH <UNREADABLE>
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Speaking from the tongue of an experienced simpleton who
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obviously would rather be an emasculated, infantile
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complaind. This note should be pretty easy to understand.
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All the warnings from the Punk Rock 101 Courses over the
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years, it's my first introduction to the, shall we say ethics
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involved with independence and the embracement of your
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community has been proven to be very true. I haven't
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felt the excitement of listening to, as well as creating
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music, along with really writing something for too many
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years now. I feel guilty beyond words about these things,
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for example when we're backstage and the lights go out
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and the manic roar of the crowd begins. It doesn't affect
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me in the way which it did for Freddie Mercury, who seemed
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to love and relish the love and admiration from the crowd,
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which is something I totally admire and envy. The fact is,
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I can't fool you, any of you. It simply isn't fair to you,
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or to me. The worst crime can think of would be to pull
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people off by faking it, pretending as if I'm having one
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100% fun. Sometimes I feel as though I should have
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a punch-in time clock before I walk out on-stage. I've
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tried everything within my power to appreciate it, and I do,
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God believe me, I do, but it's not enough. I appreciate the
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fact that I, and we, have affected, and entertained a lot
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of people. I must be one of the narcisists who only
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appreciate things when they're alone. I'm too sensitive,
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I need to be slightly numb in order to regain the enthusiasm.
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But, what's sad is our child. On our last three tours, I've
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had a much better appreciation of all the people I've known
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personally, and as fans of our music. But I still can't
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get out the frustration, the guilt, and the sympathy I have
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for everybody. There is good in all of us, and I simply
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love people too much. So much that it makes me feel too
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fucking sad. The sad little sensitive unappreciative pisces
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Jesus man! why don't you just enjoy it? I dont know!
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I have a <UNREADABLE> of a wide who sweats ambition and empadny,
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and a doughter who reminds me to much of what I use to be.
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full of love and joy, <UNREADABLE> every person she meets
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because everyone is good and will do her no harm. And that
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terrifies me to the point to where I can barely function. I
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cant stand the thought of Frances becoming the miserable self
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destructive, deathrocker she become. I have it good, very good,
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and I'm grateful, but since the age of seven, I've become
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hateful towards all humans in general. Only because it seems
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so easy for people to get along and have empathy. Empathy
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only because I love and feel for people too much I guess.
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Thank you from the pit of my burning nauseas stomach for your
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letters and concern during the last years. I'm too much of
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a neurotic moody person and I don't have the passion anymore,
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so remember, it's better to burn out, than fade away. Peace,
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love, empathy, Kurt Cobain.
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Frances and Courtney, I'll be at your altar.
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please keepgoing Courtney
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for Frances
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for her life which will be so much happier
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without me. I lOVE YOU. I LOVE YOU!
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