1061 lines
59 KiB
Plaintext
1061 lines
59 KiB
Plaintext
NUMBER OF LINES: 999
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001=Usr:0 Null User 06/30/87 20:34 Msg:0 Call:0 Lines:19
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1$If you are in need of help, you need but ask...
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2$************************* 26 JAN 90 **************************************
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3$Welcome to BWMS II (BackWater Message System II) Mike Day System operator
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4$**************************************************************************
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5$GENERAL DISCLAIMER: BWMS II IS NOT RESPONSIBLE FOR ANY INFORMATION
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6$ PLACED ON THIS SYSTEM.
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7$BWMS II was created as an electronic bill board. BWMS II is a privately
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8$owned and operated system which is currently open for use by the general
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9$public. No restrictions are placed on the use of the system. As the
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10$system is privately owned, I retain the right to remove any and all
|
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11$messages which I may find offensive. Because of the limited size of the
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12$system, it will be periodically purged of messages (only 999 lines of data
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13$can be saved). To leave a message, type 'ENTER'. Use ctrl/C to get out
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14$the ENTER mode. The message is automatically stored. If after entering
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15$the message you find you made a mistake, use the replace command to
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16$replace the line. To exit from the system, type 'BYE' then hang up.
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17$Type 'HELP' to see other commands that are available on the system.
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18$**************************************************************************
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19$
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002=Usr:1 CISTOP MIKEY 01/26/90 20:34 Msg:4898 Call:27090 Lines:3
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20 However well organized the foundations of life may be,
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21 life must always be full of risks. -- Havelock Ellis
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22 **************************************************************
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003=Usr:84 Michael Miller j 01/26/90 22:23 Msg:4899 Call:27093 Lines:9
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23 &*&*&*&*'s
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24 AT THE TOP!
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25
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26 It's been awhile since I've been at the top, and here I am on the first
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27 complete disk of the 90's.
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28
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29 An Astral Dreamer
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30 &*&*&*&*'s
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31
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004=Usr:385 Steve Culliton 01/26/90 23:36 Msg:4900 Call:27094 Lines:4
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32 ------------------------------- ------------------------------
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33 First new disk of the 90's? Heck I want to be remembered also!
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34 ------------------------------- ------------------------------
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35 And what a bonus, almost at the TOP!
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005=Usr:11 L'homme sans Par 01/27/90 01:42 Msg:4902 Call:27096 Lines:11
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36 *%@#*)#^)*$@(_)(#%(#@^()#$(^#$(^#(^@#(_)(@)_%(_)~%(@%(_)%(~_)%(#(_)(%!@%(_)(%
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37 Mikey, you have connections at Borland - could you forward a big thanks
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38 from me to Jeff Brown in Quattro Customer support - he discovered an
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39 undocumented but important bit of information for printing from QP to
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40 postscript printers, but I was not able to thank him since he left the
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41 information in a phone message. Anyway, if you could I would appreciate
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42 it - competent help on answer lines is so rare these days...
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43 voyeur: How goes the new box? Not even a peep (or just a small peep)
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44 out of you. Can you make it to the PCS meeting on the 1st of Feb???
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45 *_)#*$)%$#)^(_)(_)@#(%_@(%%() L'homme sans Parity *(%@#(%@((%@)_%*@%@#%(@(%)@
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46
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006=Usr:136 Linda Forsyth 01/27/90 12:21 Msg:4904 Call:27101 Lines:20
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47 \/-\/-\/-\/-\/-\/-\/-\/-\/-\/-\/-\/-\/-\/-\/-\/-\/-\/-\/-\/-\/-\/-\/-\/\
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48 About the 6-year-old Programmers...
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49 My brother first got an Apple II whe was 12 years old, and then
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50 he found out about modems and BBSs when her was 14. In fact, one of the
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51 first BBSs he was on was the first BackWater. Because he didn't want to
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52 look like a "juvie", he got himself a dictionary and thesaurus and learned
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53 to type and to spell and to sound like an educated human being. In fact,
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54 I'm grateful to the BBSs for that -- he had been in a phonetic reading
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55 program that has screwed up his spelli, I thought beyond repair.
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56 My Point: If he had been insulted and ragged on fot getting those
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57 first attempts exactly correct, he would never have made a further effort
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58 and U of O would not have the excellent RA they now have. Please give the
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59 "juvies" a little slack; just enough for them to either learn something or
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60 hang themselves. Think about it.
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61 Blue Rose
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62 /\-/\-/\-/\-/\-/\-/\-/\-/\-/\/-\/\-/\-/\-/\-/\-/\-/\-\/-\/\-/\-/\-/\-/\-/\-
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63 /\-/\-/\-/\-
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64 Sorry about the typos: new roomie, new computer, lousy keyboard.
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65 'he', 'when','spelling', 'fo.
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66 /\-/\-/\-/\-
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007=Usr:70 Kurfur Redlig 01/27/90 12:42 Msg:4905 Call:27102 Lines:14
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67 KKKKKKKKKKKKKKKurfur Redlig | I Be Back. Read Last Disk Fer Detailsssssssss
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68
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69 What are even scarier than the six year programmers are the 20 year old
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70 programmers who've never grown up. Think about it. A six year old at least
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71 has the chance to become a responsible modemer, and besides, they usually
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72 don't have as much experience in twitdom as some of the 20 year olds I know
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73 (some of whom are employed as computer programmers developing the software
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74 the unsuspecting public buys, really scary huh?).
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75
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76 The point of this statement being (I assume nobody could get the drivel
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77 above) that the younger generation out there at least has time to learn
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78 responsibility before they learn to do anything really destructive.
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79
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80 KKKKKKKKKKKKKurfur Redlig | Spam! Spam! Spam! Spam! Spam! Spam!!!!!!!!!!!!!
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008=Usr:137 The Professor 01/27/90 13:37 Msg:4906 Call:27103 Lines:5
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81 !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
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82 The Professor returns.......(I know, big deal.)
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83 !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
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84
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85
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009=Usr:1 CISTOP MIKEY 01/27/90 13:55 Msg:4907 Call:27105 Lines:4
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86 L'homme, The message is on it's way through the electronic
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87 pathways and byways. With luck, it won't get lost or side
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88 tracked to some small out of the way bit sink like BW <g>.
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89 ********************************************************
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010=Usr:70 Kurfur Redlig 01/27/90 16:44 Msg:4908 Call:27108 Lines:15
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90 KKKKKKKKKKKKKKKurfur Redlig | Survey Time!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
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91
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92 Enquiring Minds Want To Know:
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93
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94 Who all here saw Erik The Viking? What's you think of it?
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95
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96 Does anyone here finish reading the old disk when it is replaced by a
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97 new disk? If not, what's the point of leaving final messages?
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98
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99 What's the difference between a duck?
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100
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101 Whadd'ya think of re-introducing wolves into the wilderness?
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102
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103 KKKKKKKKKKKurfur Redlig | >R Spam! Spam! Spam! Spam! Spam! Spam!!!!!!!!!!
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104
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011=Usr:136 Linda Forsyth 01/28/90 11:57 Msg:4909 Call:27121 Lines:10
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105 /\-/\-/\-/\-/\-/\-/\-/\-/\-/\-/\-/\-/\-/\-/\-/\-/\-/\-/\-/\-/\-/\-/\-/\-/\
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106
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107 20-year-olds are pretty bed... I lived with four for a while!
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108
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109 I wanted to see Erik the Viking, but they canceled it to sw a fight...
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110 *I* read the last disk, so I think last messages are pretty important...
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111 Re-introducing wolves is a goothing. "Predators Keep the Balance!"
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112
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113 (On that first line I meantAd... I still need to learn to type...)
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114 /\-/\-/\-/\-/\-/\-/\-/\-/\-/\-/\-/\-/\-/-\/\-Blue Rose-/\-/\-/\-/\-/\-/\-/\
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012=Usr:70 Kurfur Redlig 01/28/90 13:55 Msg:4910 Call:27125 Lines:1
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115@
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013=Usr:70 Kurfur Redlig 01/28/90 18:31 Msg:4911 Call:27137 Lines:3
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116
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117 Awright! Where the hell is everyone?!??!
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118
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014=Usr:4 Milchar 01/29/90 03:17 Msg:4912 Call:27145 Lines:2
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119 We're hiding, KR. We're here, but we're hiding. :-)
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120
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015=Usr:84 Michael Miller j 01/29/90 09:42 Msg:4913 Call:27147 Lines:5
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121 {Whispered} "What was that?"
|
||
122 {Loud whisper} "Is it time to come out yet?"
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||
123 {Silence}
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124 {Quite whisper} "I guess not."
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125
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016=Usr:136 Linda Forsyth 01/29/90 17:41 Msg:4914 Call:27156 Lines:3
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126 If you made the last "real" entry 24 hours ago, is it bad taste to put on
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127 another one?
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128 /\-/\-/\-/\-Blue Rose
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017=Usr:368 Nemesis Warlock 01/29/90 18:55 Msg:4915 Call:27158 Lines:1
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129@YES.
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018=Usr:1 CISTOP MIKEY 01/29/90 20:32 Msg:4916 Call:27159 Lines:10
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130 It's not bad taste as long as you don't hog the disk.
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131 What will get people mad at you is using their character without
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132 permission. Other than that, they'll let you know if it is iritating.
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133 ********************************************************************
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134 If you are having trouble getting through, keep trying. We seem to
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135 be experiencing phone line problems. It looks like the old problem
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136 has returned. Hopefully it will be cleared up soon. In the meantime,
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137 if you get a busy signal, try calling again. you may get through after
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138 couple of tries.
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139 *********************************CM***********************************
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019=Usr:84 Michael Miller j 02/02/90 14:02 Msg:4917 Call:27185 Lines:7
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140 &*&*&*&*'s
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141 Looks lik BWMSII has returned from the land of dead telephone lines.
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142 Perhaps this was all a plot by the enemys of the NET...
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143
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144 An Astral Dreamer (Am I to hard to understand?)
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145 &*&*&*&*'s
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146
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020=Usr:7 Leonard Erickson 02/02/90 18:17 Msg:4918 Call:27204 Lines:6
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147 RYRYRYRYRYRYRYRYRYRYRYRYRYRYRYRYRYRYRYRYRYRYRYRYRYRYRYRYRYRYRYRYRYRYRYRYRY
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148 The NET has no enemies...
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149
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150
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151 ....left.
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152 RYRYRYRYRYRYRYRYRYRYRYRYRYRYRYRYRYRYRYRYRYRYRYRYRYRYRYRYRYRYRYRYRYRYRYRYRY
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021=Usr:70 Kurfur Redlig 02/02/90 19:41 Msg:4919 Call:27206 Lines:9
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153 KKKKKKKKKKKKKKKurfur Redlig | Enemies, No. Rivals, Yes!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
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154
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155 AD- You are perfectly understandable. One only needs to go without sleep
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156 for 3 days before reading your messages.
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157
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158 Question: Since such classes as Art Appreciation and Literature
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159 Appreciation exist, why are there no classes on Alchohol Appreciation?
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160
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161 KKKKKKKKKKKKKurfur Redlig | Spam! Spam! Spam! Spam! Spam! Spam!!!!!!!!!!!!
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||
022=Usr:1 CISTOP MIKEY 02/02/90 20:57 Msg:4921 Call:27207 Lines:2
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162 NET has no need for enemies, they _are_ the enemy! <grin>
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163 ----------------------------------------------------------
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023=Usr:136 Linda Forsyth 02/04/90 10:28 Msg:4924 Call:27221 Lines:7
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164 /\-/\-/\-/\-/\-/\-/\-/\-/\-/\-/\-/\-/\-/\-/\-/\-/\-/\-/\-/\-/\-/\-/\-/\-/\-
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165 So that's why I could never get through! Explains a lot - apparently
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166 Artistic Licence had the same problem . . .
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167 Does anyone ever do Backwater Inn stories any more? Are they passe?
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168 Will people throw bricks if I start one up again? Whad'ya think?
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169 /\-/\-/\-/\-/\-/\-/\-/\-/\-/\-/\-/\-/\Blue Rose/\-/\-/\-/\-/\-/\-/\-/\-/\-
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170
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024=Usr:1 CISTOP MIKEY 02/04/90 15:27 Msg:4925 Call:27225 Lines:3
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171 No one would throw bricks if you were to write something. They might
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172 throw flowers though...
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173 .........................................................................
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025=Usr:81 Albright 02/05/90 23:50 Msg:4926 Call:27234 Lines:49
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174 Speaking of writing something -
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175 Al*Al*Al*Al*Al*Al*Al*Al*Al*Al*Al*Al*Al*Al*Al*Al*Al*Al*Al*Al*Al*Al*Al*Al*Al
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176
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177 Scarlet, Wadsworth, and I were separated in the brothel before I
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178 could get any information concerning our mission. I was led to a room
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179 adorned with lots of pretty things, including a redhead.
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180 As we began the usual business procedures, I couldn't figure out
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181 why the words "never put yourself into a vulnerable position" kept
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182 flashing through my head. Within a couple minutes, however, I was mildly
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183 surprised to find myself chained helplessly to the bed, with no specific
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184 memory of the actual motions that had put me there.
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185 "Tell me everything you know, mister." She demanded, slowly
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186 unfastening my belt. I laughed in appreciation of the fantasy-scenario
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187 she had chosen. She played her role well -- with a manner that was both
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188 menacing and seductive.
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189 She produced a knife. "Simon Albright. Tell me everything you
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190 know about George!" Scratch seductive. Suddenly she was invoking certain
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191 mental images involving knives and dropping-pants that, frankly, spoiled
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192 the mood for me.
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193 Just as I reached certain key stages of un-dress, her eyes blew
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194 open and she froze in amazement (much to the satisfaction of my ego).
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195 But when she collapsed across my supine body, I could see the tranquilizer
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196 dart protruding from her posterior.
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197 And I watched as my benefactor emerged from a darkened corner of
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198 the room. It was the dark woman I had encountered in the lobby. She
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199 hurried to my side and hauled the other woman off of me, glancing for only
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200 a moment in the obvious direction, and then stretched over me to unlock
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201 the handcuffs. Suddenly we heard angry, confused shouts and the sound of
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202 panicked running in the hall.
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203 "Hurry!" She pleaded. "They're here! I can get you to safety!"
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204 She hit a control somewhere and a section of the wall slid away, revealing
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205 a dark passage. I was almost through the doorway when I remembered
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206 Scarlet!
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207 "Wait!" I shouted, grabbing her by the shoulders. "I have to get
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208 the two men I came with!"
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209 "It's too late!" She said frantically. "They've already been
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210 taken away! I found this--" She handed me a card featuring a silhouetted
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211 rabbit.
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212 Just then the commotion in the hall grew louder and someone
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213 started pounding on the door to our room.
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214 "Dammit, you're coming with me," I growled, forcing her roughly
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215 into the passage ahead of me. Scarlet never had a chance to tell me what
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216 the mission was about, and I needed someone with answers!
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217 We emerged in a dark alley and found a black limousine with keys
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218 in the ignition. It wasn't until after we had driven for several minutes
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219 that we noticed a deck of the rabbit-cards on the dashboard.
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220
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221 Albright
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222 Al*Al*Al*Al*Al*Al*Al*Al*Al*Al*Al*Al*Al*Al*Al*Al*Al*Al*Al*Al*Al*Al*Al*Al*Al
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026=Usr:11 L'homme sans Par 02/07/90 20:12 Msg:4927 Call:27253 Lines:19
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223 *@)*%_)@#%_)@#%_)(!(%!#(%#(%!#+_)#+_%($#_^*@!_)$!+@_%)!_#+(%@_#(^_@+%#+@_%(@+_(
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224 Mikey: Sorry for missing the PCS meeting, but the professor kept us in class
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225 till 9:00pm ('spoused to get over at 7:00pm) and I figured it was a bit too
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226 late to drive from 196th west side to 92nd east side by then. I assume you
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227 have worked out your own transform algorithms by now. If not, a good source
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228 for such things is the seminal book on Computer Graphics by Foley and VanDam
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229 (sp) - Also, Newman and Sproul (again sp?) have a CG book full of great
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230 mathematical stuff. I have both and have used them many times...
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231
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232 voyeur: Still no peep? Is the box working or not? Phosphor does not reveal
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233 its origin, 8MHz or 33MHz!
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234
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235 Blue person: The thing that gets me about 6-year-old programmers is how they
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236 invariably claim they have been programming for 7 years. A feat I have yet
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237 to figure out, given there are no registered patents for womb-based rs232
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238 devices.
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239
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240 *%#@_%*_)#%_#%)@#%@#*%_)#*%_@#&%@#)*^@ L'homme sans Parity *%_*_)!)(_)%*!*%!%!%
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241
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027=Usr:84 Michael Miller j 02/08/90 19:55 Msg:4929 Call:27259 Lines:6
|
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242 &*&*&*&*'s
|
||
243 One Short
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||
244
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245 An Astral Dreamer
|
||
246 &*&*&*&*&*'s
|
||
247
|
||
028=Usr:81 Albright 02/08/90 20:51 Msg:4930 Call:27262 Lines:19
|
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248 Al*Al*Al*Al*Al*Al*Al*Al*Al*Al*Al*Al*Al*Al*Al*Al*Al*Al*Al*Al*Al*Al*Al*Al
|
||
249
|
||
250 "Who is this rabbit!?" I demanded, thrusting the deck of rabbit-
|
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251 cards into my companion's face.
|
||
252 Alexandra only shook her head. "All I know is that he's been
|
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253 taking over all sorts of small-time crime operations. Drugs. Prostitution.
|
||
254 Confidence. You name it. Apparently this is one of his limousines we
|
||
255 borrowed."
|
||
256 I nodded. It made sense -- George had spent years consolidating
|
||
257 small organizations, knowing that the surest way of influencing a country's
|
||
258 actions is to corrupt and dictate the morals of her people. It was no
|
||
259 wonder George was interested in this Zephyr. Although it was probable
|
||
260 that Zephyr was just a penny-ante, greed-motivated thug.
|
||
261 "How can we get my friends back?" I asked her. "How can I get in
|
||
262 touch with this rodent?"
|
||
263 "Lagomorph," she corrected. "You can't. He's completely unreachable."
|
||
264 So I practically jumped through the roof when the car-phone rang.
|
||
265 Albright
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||
266 Al*Al*Al*Al*Al*Al*Al*Al*Al*Al*Al*Al*Al*Al*Al*Al*Al*Al*Al*Al*Al*Al*Al*Al*Al*Al
|
||
029=Usr:146 mike ahl 02/09/90 11:28 Msg:4931 Call:27271 Lines:2
|
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267
|
||
268
|
||
030=Usr:368 Nemesis Warlock 02/09/90 14:07 Msg:4933 Call:27275 Lines:87
|
||
269 :::::=====:::::=====:::::=====:::::=====:::::=====:::::=====:::::=====:::::====
|
||
270
|
||
271 "Are you certain? Did you sweep the area?"
|
||
272 "From floor to ceiling, and damn straight. They're nowhere to be
|
||
273 found."
|
||
274 Dawson cursed softly. "Right, then. Turn this building over to
|
||
275 one of the Crack groups, and set them up with the materials for what they
|
||
276 need." Stepping through the doorway, he kicked aside the impaled blonde who
|
||
277 blocked the entrance. "And somebody clean this place up! It looks like a
|
||
278 Whorehouse!"
|
||
279
|
||
280 * * *
|
||
281
|
||
282 Leichter stepped through the Main Hall and into the inner chamber,
|
||
283 Hall and into the inner chamber, heading towards a wall of books. Examining
|
||
284 the rows of titles, he made a selection, removing THE COLLECTED WORKS OF
|
||
285 BEATRIX POTTER from its place on the shelf. Immediately, with a dull hum,
|
||
286 the wall rose upwards, clicking firmly into place above him and revealing a
|
||
287 tiny door.
|
||
288 He rapped three times, listening to the resounding echo.
|
||
289 "Come in, come in, Leichter." came the syrupy voice from inside.
|
||
290 Leichter complied, squeezing through the miniscule entrance with as much
|
||
291 dignity and respect as he could.
|
||
292 "Sit down, sit down." wheezed the old man behind a desk that looked
|
||
293 as if it had been hewn from stone. "And tell me..." he paused "Tell me
|
||
294 about how things are going."
|
||
295 Leichter eyed the Old Man warily, trying to gauge the emotions that hid
|
||
296 behind those glassy eyes. He complied with the Old Man's wishes, seating
|
||
297 himself in the soft leather seat that had slid into place in front of the
|
||
298 desk from across the room.
|
||
299 "If you're asking about George-"
|
||
300 "Now," the Owithered face twisted into a grin that chilled Leichter.
|
||
301 "What else do you think I'm talking about?"
|
||
302 "The fact of the matter is that my independent research hasn't turned up
|
||
303 anything beyond what we already knew. Specifically, that it was a covert
|
||
304 group independent of government ties, though it was not initially such.
|
||
305 That, and that it's on the move, and that their chief agent for is motion
|
||
306 is a man named Albright. Beyond that, the records are so ridden with bugs and
|
||
307 psuedo-viruses that we can't go ay further. At least, not now."
|
||
308 "So in other words, we're back to where we started from?"
|
||
309 "Look at it this way. You cleared out the brothel."
|
||
310 The Old Man's eyes never left Leichter's as he rose from his desk and
|
||
311 hobbled over to a cabinet. Opening a drawer, he extracted a whiskey bottle
|
||
312 and two glasses. "Leichter... you're a good man, and I look for that in my
|
||
313 line of work."
|
||
314 Leichter shifted, decidedly uncomfortable with the tone of the
|
||
315 false praise. "Thanks." he muttered.
|
||
316 "You're young, bright, resourceful, and looking to, erh, go places..."
|
||
317 He filled the two glasses with liquor. "Whiskey?" the Old Man offered.
|
||
318 Leichter popped a stick of spearmint gum into his mouth.
|
||
319 "Ehr, I see." the Old Man coughed. "Now, let us get down to the real
|
||
320 matter at hand-" The intercom on the Old Man's desk began flashing
|
||
321 frantically. "Just a moment. Yes?"
|
||
322 "Sir?"
|
||
323 "Yes, Dawson, what is it?"
|
||
324 "Sir, we've located the missing operative. It seems that he stole our
|
||
325 vehicle."
|
||
326 "Excuse me?" the Old Man hissed.
|
||
327 "Yes, he stole our vehicle while we were inside..." Dawson's voice
|
||
328 trailed off.
|
||
329 o "Ah, I see. Now get back to what you were doing. I'm busy here."
|
||
330 "But-" There was an audible click.
|
||
331 "We'll discuss our little matter later, Leichter. Now, I believe that
|
||
332 you had some business to attend to?"
|
||
333 "Right, boss."
|
||
334
|
||
335 * * *
|
||
336
|
||
337 Leichter strode like a lion into the still air of the white chamber,
|
||
338 sending the fine mist that permeated it darting about his massive form.
|
||
339 He eyed the man chained to one of the padded walls. "Hello there, my friend.
|
||
340 I belive we have a mutual acuaintence by the name of George?"
|
||
341 The replywas suitably derogatory.
|
||
342 "Thank you. I DID so want this to be fun." Leichter opened a pocket
|
||
343 on his overcoat and withdrew a large skinning knife. "I believe your name
|
||
344 is Scarlet, no? How appropriate."
|
||
345
|
||
346 * * *
|
||
347
|
||
348 Within the confines of the black limousine, the ringing of the phone
|
||
349 was the only sound. Finally, someone realized that they should answer.
|
||
350 "Hello?" came the quavering voice.
|
||
351 "Hello there, my young friend. I hope that you have been suitably
|
||
352 enlightened regarding our procedures. How delightful."
|
||
353 Beneath the car, a small box with an LED readout sprang to life...
|
||
354 15...14....13....12...
|
||
355 :::::=====:::::=====:::::=====:::::==Zephyr::=====:::::=====:::::=====:::::====
|
||
031=Usr:148 aaron kimpton 02/10/90 20:42 Msg:4935 Call:27290 Lines:5
|
||
356
|
||
357 For all you modem people....
|
||
358 A NWBS
|
||
359
|
||
360
|
||
032=Usr:152 Aaron Kimpton 02/12/90 17:39 Msg:4936 Call:27328 Lines:10
|
||
361 For all you modem people....
|
||
362
|
||
363 A NEW BBS
|
||
364 Capt. Zzap introduces:
|
||
365 Programers Paridise=641-7295
|
||
366 It has the latest online games, and the best
|
||
367 Vietnam, Darklord, Qest
|
||
368 Suports ATARI, ANSI, ASCII color modes
|
||
369
|
||
370
|
||
033=Usr:84 Michael Miller j 02/12/90 20:00 Msg:4937 Call:27335 Lines:5
|
||
371
|
||
372 HELOOOOOOO!!!!!!!!!
|
||
373
|
||
374 Not even an echo.
|
||
375
|
||
034=Usr:1 CISTOP MIKEY 02/12/90 20:41 Msg:4938 Call:27337 Lines:1
|
||
376 burp!
|
||
035=Usr:11 L'homme sans Par 02/12/90 23:41 Msg:4939 Call:27344 Lines:7
|
||
377 *@#*%^*(^@%(@_)(@#_)^$#^*_)%(#@_)%(@_)%(@#_%)(@#+%)@_#+%@#_*%@_^*@@#_^*
|
||
378 That burp must signify that no, you don't need any graphics routines
|
||
379 anymore, and yes, I can put my books back on the shelf, eh? :-)
|
||
380
|
||
381 voyeur: still no word? This is worse than the trs-80 model 1 days!
|
||
382 *(%_)@#*%)_%(*_)(%#%^_)%@%)(@#_% L'homme sans Parity %*)_%_(@_)%(@#_)%(
|
||
383
|
||
036=Usr:394 Rayall the Pirat 02/13/90 16:02 Msg:4942 Call:27355 Lines:5
|
||
384 ArrArrArrArrArrArrArrArrArrArrArrArrArrArrArrArrArrArrArrArrArrArrArrArrArrArr
|
||
385 Ah yes, I remember back in MY day! Had to use an ABACUS then, matey, so don't
|
||
386 be complainin' about no TRS-80, me boyo! Arr! Whiskey for everyone!
|
||
387 Rayall
|
||
388 ArrArrArrArrArrArrArrArrArrArrArrArrArrArrArrArrArrArrArrArrArrArrArrArrArrArr
|
||
037=Usr:4 Milchar 02/13/90 22:56 Msg:4944 Call:27364 Lines:12
|
||
389 ++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++
|
||
390 All I wanted was a ray trace... and it wouldn't give it to me! Just
|
||
391 a ray trace...all I wanted was a ray trace...
|
||
392 CM: A two-cpu Sequent running Dynix under a moderate load takes 10 minutes
|
||
393 to generate a trace. I seem to be taking 93% of one of the cpus...
|
||
394 Since QRT hasn't produced any results, I am using a ported version of
|
||
395 another program entirely, with the help of one of the local graphics
|
||
396 gods... But I still haven't got the effect we want. Now, if I had an
|
||
397 account in the engineering department, where all the COLOR workstations
|
||
398 lurk, perhaps things would be different...
|
||
399
|
||
400 ++++++++++++++++++ still trying ++++++++++++++++++++++++ Milch ++++
|
||
038=Usr:1 CISTOP MIKEY 02/14/90 20:20 Msg:4945 Call:27380 Lines:7
|
||
401 L'Homme: I managed to sweet talk a certain friend to help out. Don't know
|
||
402 how long he'll remain a friend after this though! <grin>
|
||
403 Milch: Well, I suppose you could come over and use my Cray that my wife
|
||
404 Morgan Fairchild gave to me for my birthday last year. Yeah, right,
|
||
405 my wife gave it to me...yeah, that's that ticket!
|
||
406 Just got a new book. Crc Handbook of Mathematical Curves and Surfaces.
|
||
407 ******************************* CM ***************************************
|
||
039=Usr:4 Milchar 02/14/90 21:58 Msg:4946 Call:27383 Lines:4
|
||
408 ++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++
|
||
409 Oh, I don't think I'll need more than a few nano-cpu-seconds (now, is
|
||
410 that a few seconds on a nano-cpu, or...?)
|
||
411 +++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++ Milch ++++++++++++++++++++++
|
||
040=Usr:1 CISTOP MIKEY 02/15/90 19:14 Msg:4947 Call:27395 Lines:3
|
||
412 Well, as Robin Williams might say, I think I might have a few Nanu's to
|
||
413 spare. Nanu nanu.
|
||
414 ********************************* CM ************************************
|
||
041=Usr:84 Michael Miller j 02/15/90 21:24 Msg:4948 Call:27398 Lines:6
|
||
415 &*&*&*&*'s
|
||
416 New Part Time BBS. Hours are 11 pm till 6pm weekdays. 1200 N81.
|
||
417
|
||
418 An Astral Dreamer
|
||
419 &*&*&*&*'s
|
||
420
|
||
042=Usr:11 L'homme sans Par 02/16/90 17:32 Msg:4949 Call:27416 Lines:5
|
||
421 *@#*%@#%@#(%_)(%_)(^_)*^)@(%%(_)(%#%@#^*@#_)(!_)%(!_)*^_)(%!#(%_)(!%(%(_!%_(
|
||
422 CM: Good news. Let's see if your friend is still a friend in a few weeks.
|
||
423 AAD: How many kid-co-sysops do you have? Can I be one too, pleeeze???
|
||
424 *%_@#(%*_)@#(%_)@#(_)#(%@&@#^@_( L'homme sans Parity %(_#%_%(!_%_)#^*_(_%(_%(
|
||
425
|
||
043=Usr:1 CISTOP MIKEY 02/16/90 21:54 Msg:4950 Call:27421 Lines:6
|
||
426 But Lhomy, you already *are* a kid-co-sysop!!! ;-)
|
||
427 ********************************* CM ************************************
|
||
428 All: I've been considering reducing the number of lines available on
|
||
429 each disk here by about 300 or so lines to pick up some needed disk
|
||
430 space. Any comments? Do you hate the idea? Like it? Don't care?
|
||
431 ****************************** CM ***********************************
|
||
044=Usr:4 Milchar 02/16/90 22:57 Msg:4951 Call:27423 Lines:6
|
||
432 +++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++
|
||
433 About 300 lines or so....999 - 300 = 699. Oh, NO! We're approaching the
|
||
434 dreaded 629 LINE LIMIT! Aaaack! :-)
|
||
435 L'homme: Count 1 roommate with sysop powers. First time I've been a kid-co
|
||
436 -sysop...
|
||
437 +++++++++++++++++++++++++++++ Milch +++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++
|
||
045=Usr:84 Michael Miller j 02/18/90 11:07 Msg:4952 Call:27439 Lines:9
|
||
438 &*&*&*&*'s
|
||
439 No Kid Co-Sysops. In fact, so far there are very few users. The hours are
|
||
440 rather limiting right now. It's hard to get people to call in regularly, as
|
||
441 there are a billion or so BBS's in portland. Given full time status I think
|
||
442 things will improve.
|
||
443
|
||
444 An Astral Dreamer
|
||
445 &*&*&*&*'s
|
||
446
|
||
046=Usr:1 CISTOP MIKEY 02/18/90 20:42 Msg:4953 Call:27448 Lines:2
|
||
447 How come when I log on I get this "rooms available message?"
|
||
448 -------------------- kid-co-sysop ---------------------------
|
||
047=Usr:1 CISTOP MIKEY 02/19/90 00:08 Msg:4955 Call:27452 Lines:2
|
||
449 And what's this "ALL" command thingy?
|
||
450 ---------------------------------------
|
||
048=Usr:84 Michael Miller j 02/19/90 08:33 Msg:4959 Call:27457 Lines:7
|
||
451 &*&*&*&*'s
|
||
452 Just a reminder to everyone to call my BBS. Number posted above. Milch and
|
||
453 I are the sysops.
|
||
454
|
||
455 An Astral Dreamer
|
||
456 &*&*&*&*'s
|
||
457
|
||
049=Usr:81 Albright 02/20/90 20:43 Msg:4967 Call:27499 Lines:67
|
||
458 Al*Al*Al*Al*Al*Al*Al*Al*Al*Al*Al*Al*Al*Al*Al*Al*Al*Al*Al*Al*Al*Al*Al*Al*Al*Al*
|
||
459
|
||
460 I slammed the phone down and skidded the car to a stop.
|
||
461 ...TEN...NINE...EIGHT...
|
||
462 "What's wrong?!" screamed Alexandra.
|
||
463 ...SEVEN...
|
||
464 "Get out!" I shouted, trying to open my door.
|
||
465 ...SIX...
|
||
466 She spotted the LED and froze for a moment while I leaned across
|
||
467 her to open her door. It wouldn't budge.
|
||
468 ...FIVE...FOUR...
|
||
469 She started banging on a window with one of her stiletto heels.
|
||
470 ...THREE...
|
||
471 I looked around wildly, helplessly.
|
||
472 ...TWO...
|
||
473 We cringed grotesquely.
|
||
474 ...ONE...
|
||
475 Alexandra lunged suddenly, grasping the ignition key and rotating
|
||
476 it from "ACC" to "Off." The LED faded.
|
||
477 ...?...
|
||
478 After several seconds, considerably less than one of which involved
|
||
479 our dismemberment, we burst into laughter, and threw our arms around each
|
||
480 other. The tension slowly drained from our bodies as we held each other in
|
||
481 the ensuing silence.
|
||
482 Finally, we took stock of our situation. The doors wouldn't open
|
||
483 and we couldn't locate any knobs for the windows.
|
||
484 "Oh, here!" Alexandra proclaimed, pointing to a switch on the
|
||
485 door. "This switch lowers the window." She clicked it a couple times, with
|
||
486 no effect. "Needs electricity though."
|
||
487 "No problem!" I said, absently reaching for the ignition.
|
||
488 Albright
|
||
489 Al*Al*Al*Al*Al*Al*Al*Al*Al*Al*Al*Al*Al*Al*Al*Al*Al*Al*Al*Al*Al*Al*Al*Al*Al*Al
|
||
490
|
||
491 WwWwWwWwWwWwWwWwWwWwWwWwWwWwWwWwWwWwWwWwWwWwWwWwWwWwWwWwWwWwWwWwWwWwWwWwWwWw
|
||
492
|
||
493 Scarlet hung, exhausted, from the wall where Leichter was interrogating
|
||
494 him. He had revealed nothing to the fiendish man.
|
||
495 "So, you are willing to die rather than reveal your secrets!" said the
|
||
496 interrogator. "We'll see if you feel the same way while your friend is
|
||
497 mutilated before your eyes!" So Scarlet was removed and Wadsworth was
|
||
498 fastened to the wall in his place.
|
||
499 "You realize I am sworn to delete myself, and my companion, before
|
||
500 downloading...uh...revealing any vital data," said Scarlet quietly.
|
||
501 "But Leichter simply ordered an electric shock to be administered to
|
||
502 Wadsworth's helpless body. Scarlet watched in anguish.
|
||
503 "Now, Scarlet," Leichter said smoothly, "let's start with this cal-
|
||
504 culator-looking thing." He produced Scarlet's little computer device. "My
|
||
505 scientists can't get it to work. Tell me what it is."
|
||
506 Scarlet took it from Leichter. "This? Why, this is just a simple
|
||
507 calculator." He secretly connected its dangling wire to something beneath
|
||
508 his jacket. "For example," Scarlet continued, "If I were to enter two
|
||
509 zeroes, like this ...zero...zero... an then an undefined variable, like this
|
||
510 "D", which could stand for ... oh, say... 'Destruct', and then I were to enter
|
||
511 another zero..."
|
||
512 Wadsworth
|
||
513
|
||
514 WwWwWwWwWwWwWwWwWwWwWwWwWwWwWwWwWwWwWwWwWwWwWwWwWwWwWwWwWwWwWwWwWwWwWwWwWwWw
|
||
515
|
||
516 Al*Al*Al*Al*Al*Al*Al*Al*Al*Al*Al*Al*Al*Al*Al*Al*Al*Al*Al*Al*Al*Al*Al*Al*Al*Al
|
||
517
|
||
518 "You nearly blew the shit out of us." Alexandra observed.
|
||
519 "Well you didn't have to overreact." I replied, massaging my
|
||
520 bruised jaw. "Anyway, it's a good thing I remembered about this anvil I've
|
||
521 been carrying around!"
|
||
522 And so I smashed the window and we were free.
|
||
523 Albright
|
||
524 Al*Al*Al*Al*Al*Al*Al*Al*Al*Al*Al*Al*Al*Al*Al*Al*Al*Al*Al*Al*Al*Al*Al*Al*Al*Al
|
||
050=Usr:1 CISTOP MIKEY 02/21/90 18:48 Msg:4971 Call:27513 Lines:6
|
||
525 the one with the muscular arm decending from above with a vaugly
|
||
526 labial growth on the shoulder, clutching a mammary nosed Zephyr,
|
||
527 veiled in thin chromnium yellow, spewing a green chrona, with a
|
||
528 figure in the rear dashing to the distance to get out of the path
|
||
529 or pull away from the chest of the arm, I don't know which....
|
||
530 -------------------------------------------------------------------
|
||
051=Usr:165 Bart Simpson 02/22/90 14:24 Msg:4974 Call:27530 Lines:150
|
||
531 696969696969
|
||
532 The Little UFO that Could
|
||
533 *************************
|
||
534 * TOP SECRET *
|
||
535 *************************
|
||
536 GAMMA SIGMA PHI
|
||
537 FOR YOUR EYES ONLY
|
||
538 by
|
||
539 Benjamim Jamen
|
||
540 What I am about to tell you is a story which will tax the limits of your
|
||
541 imagination. This story is as true as any other UFO documentary. Every word
|
||
542 of it. There is a Howard (known around the office as Howierd). We ARE the
|
||
543 best of buddies. There is a Prissy. She IS a skinny little Japanese girl who
|
||
544 works at Frizby's. And, worst of all, there IS a coverup in progress right as
|
||
545 you read these words!
|
||
546
|
||
547 What does all this have to do with UFO's? More than you think. Read on...
|
||
548
|
||
549 Howy and I were designing the next generation of software on the back of beer
|
||
550 soaked napkins at Frizby's when the subject was first broached. Howierd
|
||
551 designs software with wire wrap tools and soldering irons. He's the kind of
|
||
552 guy who reads every issue of Microcornucopia from cover-to-cover and has
|
||
553 little gadgets, scattered throughout his cubicle, to prove it. Since the
|
||
554 company won't let him connect directly into the phone line with some of his
|
||
555 wizmos (our 'Telephone Control Officer' is a flunky GS-2 who constantly has to
|
||
556 flex his nonexistant power muscle by not letting us do the neat and
|
||
557 interesting things which require a direct connection to the local PBX), Howy
|
||
558 built a neat little robot arm (see issue 16 of Byte magazine) that lifts up
|
||
559 the handset and places it on his 'answering machine', which is really a
|
||
560 digitizer connected to his PC which...anyway, you get the picture. Howy,
|
||
561 despite his harmless pudge, is a force to be reckoned with. The Aliens never
|
||
562 had a chance against him.
|
||
563
|
||
564 There I go, getting sidetracked again. But, if you want to hear this story,
|
||
565 you're going to have to sit through the whole thing, as I remember it.
|
||
566 Anything less would be a distortion of the truth! You wouldn't see the 'big
|
||
567 picture', as they say in the Intelligence world. Howy and I have worked on
|
||
568 Intel projects for years, now. We go in the building in the morning and
|
||
569 sometimes come out at night. There are no windows or anything like that in
|
||
570 there. Looking from the outside, you'd call me a liar, because it looks like
|
||
571 the building is no less than 80% glass. But, if you could look through that
|
||
572 glass you'd see a metal shield staring you right back in the face. The shield
|
||
573 is there so that the important work Howy and I do for the security of this
|
||
574 country doesn't emanate into the government housing project across the street.
|
||
575 No telling what the dead beats across the street would do with that kind of
|
||
576 information.
|
||
577
|
||
578 With a job like that, you can now see why we were at Frizby's soaking up the
|
||
579 suds. Prissy was standing there-after a few I always wind up leaning as far
|
||
580 back as possible to get a good gander at her posterial (look that up in your
|
||
581 Websters!) gift as she bends over to hand Howy his next brew (if you are going
|
||
582 to appreciate any part of her anatomy, it's got to be the rear since the other
|
||
583 two parts are smaller than freeze dried lotus buds). I use the angle of the
|
||
584 lean as a measure, that is, I allow myself to lean far enough back to fall out
|
||
585 of the chair up to 3 times before declaring I've had enough and calling it
|
||
586 quits for the night. This proved to be a good night. The chair was already
|
||
587 at a good 45 degree angle and I wasn't even beginning to lose balance.
|
||
588
|
||
589 Howy started it, "You seen all that UFO stuff on the Bulletin Boards lately?"
|
||
590
|
||
591 "Yeah, pretty crazy...", I replied. Prissy was ambling away, holding the
|
||
592 empty tray in the curve of her left side. I watched her. You know, there
|
||
593 comes a point just short of middle age when the lower part of a man's anatomy
|
||
594 sporadically and totally drains the cerebral cortex of blood, leaving him in a
|
||
595 state of semiconsciousness, a point at which he is no longer responsible for
|
||
596 his actions. In other words, the brain is drained of blood in order to feed
|
||
597 the capillaries of the lower extremity. Thinking is not possible. It is a
|
||
598 good time to talk about UFO's.
|
||
599
|
||
600 "No, I don't think it is, Ben. Think about it. It's all starting to fit
|
||
601 together. Why would the United States government fund such a silly project
|
||
602 like SETI to the tune of millions of dollars for years unless there was
|
||
603 something in it? You've been doing government contracts for years-doesn't all
|
||
604 of that strike you as the least bit peculiar?"
|
||
605
|
||
606 (...to be continued...)
|
||
607 696969696969696969
|
||
608 696969696969 (part 1b)
|
||
609 "Nope. The government's got tons of money and doesn't know what the hell to
|
||
610 do with it. Look at all the rat shit things they've had us do. Just this
|
||
611 morning I was calling all over the place to find someone to QA that little EMF
|
||
612 monitoring trinket you threw together. Only, when we find someone to do it,
|
||
613 they won't be cleared to even see the thing, much less QA it. By the time
|
||
614 they get cleared, you'll have come up with something even spiffier which will
|
||
615 obselete the first one while this QA guy sits around reading something really
|
||
616 mentally straining, like Wadsworth, and earning $50K/year. It's absurd!"
|
||
617
|
||
618 "Oh, you mean Herb. He was reading Whitman, not Wadsworth."
|
||
619
|
||
620 "It's all the same-your quintessential Liberal Arts trash."
|
||
621
|
||
622 "Funny-didn't you get a BA, as in Liberal Arts?"
|
||
623
|
||
624 "I got a degree in mathematics at a time when physics, chemistry, and math
|
||
625 degrees all fell under the BA umbrella. Now you can even get a BS in Business
|
||
626 Administration! Hey, when we got our degrees, the men were men and so were
|
||
627 the women. Remember, Howy???" I smiled and did a Groucho with my eyebrows.
|
||
628
|
||
629 "Hey, that's not funny. I had no idea that Brit was in drag. And facts are
|
||
630 facts: The Intelligence Community was willing enough to overlook my little
|
||
631 misadventure and still hand me a compartmented clearance.
|
||
632
|
||
633 "Look, Ben, don't change the subject. I'm serious. I want to talk about
|
||
634 UFO's before you lose count of how many times you've fallen off your stool and
|
||
635 decide to go home. Damn, beer's empty. HEY, PRISSY," Howy held up his hand
|
||
636 in the peace salute of yesteryear, "TWO MORE COLD ONES!"
|
||
637
|
||
638 Howy turned back and looked at me. This thing was eating him. Howy gets that
|
||
639 way sometimes. A problem is eating at him. He sleeps in his office a few
|
||
640 days, his breath starts smelling like axle grease, eyes turn red and wild,
|
||
641 everybody starts avoiding him. Then the problem is solved and good old Howy
|
||
642 is back.
|
||
643
|
||
644 Howy leaned over the table. He was really getting serious. "UFO's, Ben.
|
||
645 They're real. And you and me, we've got to prove that science is useful here.
|
||
646 The whole UFO movement is going over the deep end into all this mysticism
|
||
647 crap. "
|
||
648
|
||
649 "Why 'you and me'?"
|
||
650
|
||
651 "Because you're a practical person. You believe in the scientific method and
|
||
652 all that. You-"
|
||
653
|
||
654 "Wait a hold it. I'm a mathemaultician." Words were starting to slur a bit,
|
||
655 but I still had only tipped over once. "I make a bunch of rules, apply
|
||
656 numbers to them, if it all works out-great. If it means homosexuals can make
|
||
657 babies and the sky is green, that's fine as long as it all fits within the
|
||
658 context of the latest rules."
|
||
659
|
||
660 "Ben, you're such a logical person you can't even see it. Listen, I want to
|
||
661 tell you something serious and I don't want you to laugh. We have to go to
|
||
662 South America, Ben. We have to go to prove the UFO phenomenom is real and the
|
||
663 Aliens are a force to be reckoned with.
|
||
664
|
||
665 "Please, don't ask me how I know this. It's hard to accept, but it IS the
|
||
666 truth. Have I ever been wrong before?"
|
||
667
|
||
668 Good point. Wasn't much I could say to that. Howy, no matter how wierd his
|
||
669 claims have seemed in the past, has always turned out to be dead center, on
|
||
670 target, whenever he gets past the hypothesis stage. On the other hand...
|
||
671
|
||
672 "Before you always have said things for a reason. Yeah, there's been lots of
|
||
673 times when I haven't understood the reasons, but at least I had some idea,
|
||
674 maybe subconcious, you were on the right track." Then I suddenly realized I
|
||
675 was getting sucked into Howy's sullen attitude and tried to get the
|
||
676 conversation back to reality. "Jesus, let's get off the philosophical jargon.
|
||
677 Howy, you've already had too many beers and the fact is YOUR facts warped."
|
||
678
|
||
679 (...to be continued...)
|
||
680 696969696969696969
|
||
052=Usr:84 Michael Miller j 02/24/90 01:14 Msg:4975 Call:27557 Lines:8
|
||
681 &*&*&*&*'s
|
||
682 I've been somewhat less verbal here recently. Seems the older I get the less
|
||
683 of interest I have to say. This doesn't stop me from checking in every couple
|
||
684 of days though. I wonder what the lurk to post ratio is right now.
|
||
685
|
||
686 An Astral Dreamer
|
||
687 &*&*&*&*'s
|
||
688
|
||
053=Usr:4 Milchar 02/24/90 20:53 Msg:4976 Call:27572 Lines:3
|
||
689 +++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++
|
||
690 Calls/messages = 5.54.
|
||
691 +++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++ Milch-almost-lurking ++++++
|
||
054=Usr:13 voyeur 02/25/90 23:28 Msg:4978 Call:27588 Lines:11
|
||
692 :::::::O O:::::::02/26/90::::::::::::::::::::::::::::00:09:14:::::O O::::::::
|
||
693 L'homme: the Savage Bench88 gives Error: 0.0046340376139
|
||
694 E.T. : 00:00:09.06
|
||
695 Relative to IBM-PC: 22.185
|
||
696 (just a bit slower than a 286 /w 287)
|
||
697 the Dhrystone says:
|
||
698 Dhrystone(1.1) time for 50000 passes = 4
|
||
699 This machine benchmarks at 12500 dhrystones/second.
|
||
700 As someone once remarked, "Aye, Captain, and at Warp 9 we're going nowhere
|
||
701 mighty fast."
|
||
702 ::::::::O O::::::::::::::::::::::::voyeur::::::::::::::::::::::::::O O::::::::
|
||
055=Usr:11 L'homme sans Par 02/26/90 22:58 Msg:4981 Call:27605 Lines:4
|
||
703 $@%@%#@%))^)^*^(%$^#%^$#^(_*(&^$#%@#$%$)&(^^)^&_&$@#%$@%)^)^^%%(*%$%$^&%^$@&(_&
|
||
704 voyeur: green!
|
||
705 $#%@#%@$#%@#%~@~!@)^)^*)(_+(+^%^$^#@ L'homme sans Parity ^)^(*())%@#%#@%%^)^((&
|
||
706
|
||
056=Usr:368 Nemesis Warlock 02/28/90 14:06 Msg:4986 Call:27629 Lines:54
|
||
707 :::::=====:::::=====:::::=====:::::=====:::::=====:::::=====:::::=====:::::====
|
||
708 The Old Man watched in abject fascination as the unsavory occupants
|
||
709 of the automobile struggled in vain to extricate themselves from what appeared
|
||
710 to be an inescapable trap. He rotated away from the private camscreen he was
|
||
711 watching to flip open a small control panel, his trembling fingers hovering
|
||
712 over a few of the buttons... TOXIC SPILL, ACID, GAS... The decisions wer
|
||
713 so TAXING! But, then, that's why he was in charge, he mused.
|
||
714 A loud crash from the camscreen shattered both the distant car window
|
||
715 and his narrative posturing. He spun back to face the screen, cursing low
|
||
716 when he witnessed Albright and his group climbing clumsily from the car.
|
||
717 "Blast!" he hissed, sending a shiver down his spine with his own foulness
|
||
718 of word. "Such as this will not be accepted." He turned back to the
|
||
719 control panel and punched a key. TIMED DETONATION... 3... 2... 1
|
||
720
|
||
721 * * *
|
||
722
|
||
723 Far away at that exact same moment, Albright and company were
|
||
724 amazed to witness the exploding car provide them with a showing of what
|
||
725 appeared to be the widest assortment of car-deaths imaginable outside of a
|
||
726 James Bond film. Gas nozzles flared amidst burning jets of acid, a thick
|
||
727 green ooze devoured the leather interior, all as the flames from the
|
||
728 charges placed strategically around the car chose to detonate. Truly, it
|
||
729 was a sght to behold.
|
||
730
|
||
731 * * *
|
||
732
|
||
733 Leichter grabbed the calculator from its owner, ignoring the intense
|
||
734 electric shock that coursed through him. He held the device in front of
|
||
735 Wadsworth. As an evil grin crossed his mangled face, he crushed it,
|
||
736 sending bits of circuit board to the pristine white floor. "American
|
||
737 engineering." he whispered, as a black boot pressed the life out of whatever
|
||
738 bold computer chip had survived the terrible fall. "Now, as we say, back
|
||
739 to business?" Leichter drew the skinning knife. "George?"
|
||
740
|
||
741 * * *
|
||
742
|
||
743 Dawson pressed firmly on the intercom switch. "Boss?"
|
||
744 "Yes?"
|
||
745 "About the George cronies... Whaddayawan us to do wit' em?"
|
||
746 "Once Leichter is finished with them you can do whatever you wish.
|
||
747 Just make sure that they turn up floating in the East River by morning."
|
||
748 "You got it, Boss."
|
||
749 "Oh, and Dawson?"
|
||
750 "Yeah?" The Old Man could hear the audible snap ofDawson's bubble gum,
|
||
751 even across the intercom thick with coding static.
|
||
752 "Make it messy."
|
||
753 "Ciao."
|
||
754
|
||
755 Dawson lifted his finger from the first switch and pressed another.
|
||
756 "Boss wants us to ice the twerps. They took our main means of transport.
|
||
757 Accordin' to the Big Guy, they're somewhere near Fifth and Hutch. Send
|
||
758 in about seven guys and a chopper backup in case things don't work out."
|
||
759
|
||
760 :::::=====:::::=====:::::=====:::::==Zephyr (I told you We're Fast)===:::::====
|
||
057=Usr:165 Bart Simpson 03/01/90 12:57 Msg:4989 Call:27640 Lines:56
|
||
761 696969696969 (part one-c)
|
||
762 Prissy showed up right about then. Frizby's was pretty packed. She must have
|
||
763 heard the last part of the conversation since she chimed in while setting down
|
||
764 the little golden treasures, "You guys believe in flying saucers?"
|
||
765
|
||
766 "No", Me.
|
||
767
|
||
768 "Yes", Howy.
|
||
769
|
||
770 "I tell you something," Prissy continued. "I know flying saucer are real.
|
||
771 Believe it or not, I never slept with a man in my whole life. But I still
|
||
772 have a little boy. How that happen? Very simple. Space Aliens. They came
|
||
773 one night, give me a shot, then I have little boy in nine months."
|
||
774
|
||
775 You know, some people say that love can be measured in inches. If so, my love
|
||
776 for Prissy just deflated itself sufficiently well so that I was able, at least
|
||
777 a short time, to think in her prescence. In other words, the cerebrum became
|
||
778 engorged with blood and my brain's first reaction was to make me laugh. It
|
||
779 made me laugh real hard. Then it made me fall out of the stool for the second
|
||
780 time that night.
|
||
781
|
||
782 Howy was disgusted with me as he looked at Prissy, "Immaculate Conception-very
|
||
783 common theme among UFOlogists. Prissy, where are you from? I don't mean your
|
||
784 parents-you Orientals think 'where are you from?' means where are your folks
|
||
785 from. No, Dear," (boy, he was laying it on pretty thick-wish I'd thought of
|
||
786 that), "Where are YOU from?".
|
||
787
|
||
788 "I born and raised in Tokyo. But I still US citizen. Lot's of men here think
|
||
789 I need to get married to stay here, but that not so."
|
||
790
|
||
791 "Thanks for the personal history." Howy turned back to me, "Japanese. Gosh.
|
||
792 Do you know what that means, Ben? Part of this UFO cult believes the
|
||
793 Orientals are under the control of the Aliens. Mind boggling.
|
||
794
|
||
795 "How do you think a nation that has seen their currency double in value can
|
||
796 still produce superior automobiles at competitive prices?"
|
||
797
|
||
798 "Subsidies?" Prissy asked.
|
||
799
|
||
800 "No. Look at their Subaru's, for instance. No one else in the world can
|
||
801 build an $8,000 4 wheel drive vehicle and sell it with a 100K mile warranty.
|
||
802 Nobody. I'm not going to jump to conclusions-don't misunderstand me. It's
|
||
803 just part of the evidence. Ben, let me tell you something. Do you know what
|
||
804 Subaru means in Japanese?"
|
||
805
|
||
806 "Yeah, it mean a kind of star-consterration?" That was Prissy again.
|
||
807
|
||
808 "Right! It's a constellation, Pleiades to be exact. Why would a car company
|
||
809 name itself after a constellation?" Howy turned to me with that serious look
|
||
810 in his eyes again. I think Howy's been working too hard lately. Then he
|
||
811 slurred, "It all adds up. Ben, WILL you go to South America with me?"
|
||
812
|
||
813 At this point, I was afraid he was going to fall out of HIS chair.
|
||
814
|
||
815 "HEY, PRISS!" It was the bartender. "We got some thirsty people over here,
|
||
816 let's quit yapping and start flapping." I'm not sure what that meant,
|
||
058=Usr:165 Bart Simpson 03/01/90 13:16 Msg:4990 Call:27641 Lines:119
|
||
817 "HEY, PRISS!" It was the bartender. "We got some thirsty people over here,
|
||
818 let's quit yapping and start flapping." I'm not sure what that meant,
|
||
819 probably some sort of alien talk.
|
||
820
|
||
821 "Sorree. Got to go. You be here at 3am and we talk more. Okay?"
|
||
822
|
||
823 "You bet I'll be here!", I said, tipping back a little too far and crashing
|
||
824 into the floor behind me. Ouch, that hurt. Prissy was giggling, and then
|
||
825 walked away. Howy wasn't too impressed. Let's see, that leaves two crash
|
||
826 dives before I've got to make an exit. Or have I used them up? Damn.
|
||
827 Probably best to order another brew.
|
||
828
|
||
829 -----------------------------------
|
||
830
|
||
831 Let's summarize what's happened here. Howy wants to go to Rio and I've
|
||
832 unknowingly contributed to the Alien cause by owning a Subaru. Prissy is
|
||
833 probably related to the Aliens by race and has certainly been impregnated by
|
||
834 them. This is almost too much to bear. Got to get this story out to the
|
||
835 local BBS before the CIA finds out. The FBI, KGB, and the Aussies (that
|
||
836 comes later) will be standing in line to bug my phone after this story hits
|
||
837 the line...
|
||
838
|
||
839 By the way, Howy says, "Happiest of Holidays to all of you, and stay tuned for
|
||
840 the next episode.".
|
||
841
|
||
842 Next episode: We hypnotize Bob, Prissy's 4 year old son, to find the truth
|
||
843 about the abductions.
|
||
844
|
||
845 =========================================================================
|
||
846 696969696969696969
|
||
847 -696969696969
|
||
848 =========================================================================
|
||
849 2 of many
|
||
850 The Little UFO that Could
|
||
851 *************************
|
||
852 * TOP SECRET *
|
||
853 *************************
|
||
854 GAMMA SIGMA PHI
|
||
855 FOR YOUR EYES ONLY
|
||
856 by
|
||
857 Benjamim Jamen
|
||
858
|
||
859 "I've always dreaded the day when the Chinese
|
||
860 discover communism is bull shit."
|
||
861 -Former President Reagan to
|
||
862 Former Prime Minister Nakasone over a cup of Saki
|
||
863 at Frizby's East in Tokyo
|
||
864
|
||
865 Hello, we're back again. Hope you survived the holidays as well as we
|
||
866 did. The biggest complaint we heard about the last episode was that it
|
||
867 "jumped around a lot". The second biggest complaint was that it didn't
|
||
868 start with a memorable quote. Well, there's your quote.
|
||
869
|
||
870 The last thing I remember from the last episode was slopping down
|
||
871 a brew or two at Frizby's and then...
|
||
872
|
||
873 Drifting, drifting, going somewhere. Was this an astral experience?
|
||
874 Where the hell did Howy go? I looked behind me to see if he was
|
||
875 following. He wasn't. The only thing behind me was a massive
|
||
876 blue-white sphere, which began receding rapidly as I looked back. Oh
|
||
877 shit. What have I done now?
|
||
878
|
||
879 Obviously, I died in the bar and was disembarking from my home planet.
|
||
880 That must be it. It was an effect of missing my physical exam this
|
||
881 year. Too many cold ones at Frizby's, too little warm food at home,
|
||
882 typical Western excesses, the next thing you know you're an astronaut.
|
||
883 Goodbye, earth...
|
||
884
|
||
885 I looked up in time to see the Moon approaching. Let's see, there's
|
||
886 Tycho, Mare Nubium, and, holy shit! We're really picking up speed now.
|
||
887 "We"? Who's that? I looked back. Neither Howy nor Prissy was following
|
||
888 me. In fact, all that was there was the blue-white orb (rapidly
|
||
889 receding), the Moon (rapidly receding) and millions of stars (not
|
||
890 rapidly receding). I was really going somewhere this time.
|
||
891
|
||
892 You know, after you've died and started this long journey to the Maker,
|
||
893 you say a prayer, even if you're not inclined towards that sort of
|
||
894 thing. So, I started the prayer process. It's pretty hard when you
|
||
895 haven't even mumbled thanks for a crummy meal in over 20 years. Time to
|
||
896 put my best foot forward.
|
||
897
|
||
898 "Hi, God. I'm not sure what to say, it's been so long. " Even the sun
|
||
899 seemed to be receding now. Boy, was I in trouble. "How are things up
|
||
900 there? Guess I'll find out in just few. Nice view." It's hard to
|
||
901 make conversation with Someone you've ignored for 20 years. "Say, you
|
||
902 know what? All that ELINT work I did for Uncle Sam? Well, it was
|
||
903 just a job, you know. Yeah, I did have fun at other people's expense,
|
||
904 but look at the circumstances-the Sovs were doing the same thing to us.
|
||
905 And, hell...sorry, I meant 'heck'...I was doing it for cheap."
|
||
906
|
||
907 God didn't say anything.
|
||
908
|
||
909 It's pretty tough when you're trying to remember something you did for
|
||
910 which you should repent, knowing that any second now you'll meet whoever
|
||
911 happens to be at the Gates of Heaven. Damn. I wish Howy was here.
|
||
912 Howy's religion is better defined than mine. He doesn't go to Synagogue
|
||
913 much any more, but he was better raised to know the ins and outs of
|
||
914 getting to heaven, I guess. Me, coming from a Gentile/WASP background,
|
||
915 I had no idea where to even start.
|
||
916
|
||
917 "God is great
|
||
918 God is good
|
||
919 And we thank him for this food..."
|
||
920 No. That's not the right thing to say.
|
||
921 "Now I lay me down to sleep..."
|
||
922
|
||
923 No, I should just shutup and enjoy the view. Maybe I wasn't dead
|
||
924 after all. Maybe the Aliens had abducted me and were now transporting
|
||
925 me, Shirley MacLaine style, to their Leader.
|
||
926
|
||
927 It was the dead quiet which was most unnerving. The quiet almost had a
|
||
928 texture to it. Against that texture, was this deep black (by deep, I
|
||
929 mean light years deep). Against that black, were the stars and a few
|
||
930 shiny orbs speckled here and there. The thoughts finally quit rattling
|
||
931 through my mind. My mind took on the texture of the quiet. Maybe I
|
||
932 fell asleep for a while.
|
||
933 (...to be continued...)
|
||
934 696969696969696969
|
||
935
|
||
059=Usr:368 Nemesis Warlock 03/02/90 13:17 Msg:4991 Call:27656 Lines:3
|
||
936 HOW CLEVER!
|
||
937 I'VE GOT IT! LET'S JUST HAVE ABSOLUTELY EVERYBODY WAIT FOR EVERYBODY ELSE TO
|
||
938 FILL THE LAST 64 LINES! THEN WE'LL GET TO A NEW DISK REALLY QUICKLY!!!!!!
|
||
060=Usr:272 Talos 03/03/90 19:03 Msg:4993 Call:27678 Lines:61
|
||
939 <*><*><*><*><*><*><*><*><*><*><*><*><*><*><*><*><*><*><*><*><*><*><*><*><*><*>
|
||
940 Okay, but I'll bet not many will see it!
|
||
941@
|
||
942@ Birdhouse in your Soul
|
||
943@
|
||
944@ ' orol redImntyur only friend
|
||
945@ u ' ite gloigfiend
|
||
946@ u eally I'm not actually your friend...
|
||
947@ .but I am
|
||
948@
|
||
949@ lecnr nteote y the lightswitch, who watches over you
|
||
950@ aealtl idos nyour soul
|
||
951@ o oput too fine a point on it, say I'm the only bei your bonnet
|
||
952@ aealtle birdhouse in your soul
|
||
953@ Ihve a secret to tell, rmm lcrcal well
|
||
954@ tsemsaeadImleaving out the whistles and bells
|
||
955@ othe room ms iten to me; filibuster vigilantly
|
||
956@ ynm sbu canary one-note spelled l-i-t-e
|
||
957@
|
||
958 Birdhouse in your Soul
|
||
959
|
||
960 'yu oly friend-I'm ot your only friend
|
||
961 But I'm a little glowing friend
|
||
962 But really I'm not actually your friend...
|
||
963 ...but I am
|
||
964
|
||
965 lue canary in the outlet by the lightswitch, who watches over you?
|
||
966 Make a little birdhouse in your soul
|
||
967 ot to put too fine a point on it, say I'm the only bee in your bonnet
|
||
968 Make a little birdhouse in your soul
|
||
969
|
||
970 I have a secret to tell, from my electrical well
|
||
971 It's a simple message and I'm leaving out the whistles and bells
|
||
972 So the room must listen to me; filibuster vigilantly
|
||
973 My name is blue canary one-note spelled l-i-t-e
|
||
974
|
||
975 My story's infinite, like the Longines Symphonette-it doesn't rest
|
||
976
|
||
977 Blue canary in the outlet by the lightswitch, who watches over you?
|
||
978 Make a little birdhouse in your soul
|
||
979 Not to put too fine a point on it, say I'm the only bee in your bonnet
|
||
980 Make a little birdhouse in your soul
|
||
981
|
||
982 I'm your only friend-I'm not your only friend
|
||
983 But I'm a little glowing friend
|
||
984 But really I'm not actually your friend...
|
||
985 ...but I am
|
||
986
|
||
987 There's a picture opposite me, of my primitive ancestry
|
||
988 Which stood on rocky shores and kept the beaches shipwreck free
|
||
989 Though I respect that a lot, I'd be fired if that were my job
|
||
990 After killing Jason off and countless screaming Argonauts
|
||
991
|
||
992 luebird of friendliness like guardian angels it's always near
|
||
993
|
||
994 Blue canary in the outlet by the lightswitch, who watches over you?
|
||
995 Make a little birdhouse in your soul
|
||
996 Not to put too fine a point on it, say I'm the only bee in your bonnet
|
||
997 Make a little birdhouse in your soul
|
||
998
|
||
999@ Adwhile you're at it leave the nite light on
|