636 lines
34 KiB
Plaintext
636 lines
34 KiB
Plaintext
LIST
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FILE ON
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MARGIN IS 64
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STATUS: ALL ALLOWED
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NUMBER OF LINES: 629
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1 If you are in need of help, you need but ask....
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2 ********************** REMOVED: 25 MAR 84 ******************
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3 Welcome to BWMS (BackWater Message System) Mike Day System operator
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4 ************************************************************
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5 GENERAL DISCLAIMER: BWMS IS NOT RESPONSIBLE FOR ANY INFORMATION
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6 PLACED ON THIS SYSTEM.
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7 BWMS was created as an electronic bill board. BWMS is a privatly owned
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8 and operated system which is currently open for use by the general public.
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9 No restrictions are placed on the use of the system. As the system is
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10 privatly owned, I retain the right to remove any and all messages which
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11 I may find offensive. Because of the limited size of the system, it will be
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12 periodically purged of messages. (only 629 lines of data can be saved)
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13 To leave a message, type 'ENTER' and use ctrl/C or break to get out of the
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14 ENTER mode. The message is automatically stored. If after entering the
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15 message you find you made a mistake, use the replace command to replace
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16 the line. To exit from the system, type 'OFF' then hang up.
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17 Type 'HELP' to see other commands that are available on the system.
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18 ************************************************************
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19
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20 @@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@
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21 Oh, how I love new disks!!!!!!!
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22 actually, I really haven't much to say, but I couldn't pass up the
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23 oppertunity to use a new disk.
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24 Commander: Where are you?
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25 Come to think of it, where are d and tarn and brenden and all the others
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26 who's writing I used to love (especially d's)
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27 Fast Fred
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28 BSAL
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29 (ret)
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30 @@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@
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31 ::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::
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32 "well sir,you have proved yourself,here is your answer..."
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33 "wmsksqrqccimsrrfcmpgegml?rcpmdnpgk?j@cjafrfcpgnw"
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34 t"the rest of you may wish the same knowledge,ffor you a potluck question"
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35 what was the name of the cat in "macbeth":hint,called by the first witch.
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36 ::::::::::::::WIZARD::::::::::::
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37 +++++++++++++++++++++++
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38 ++++++I DID IT!++++++++
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39 +++++++++++++++++++++++
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40 EXIT
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41 :::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::
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42 #Bard: the answer to the first is
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43 you must seek out the originater of primal belch theripy.
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44 It was a two position alphabetic shift.
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45 The second seems to be Graymalkin (interesting!).
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46 I know, I know - you would have gotten that too. Well, until
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47 I get up enough courage to actively join an 'adventure', I must
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48 content myself with occasional commentary.
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49 Thanks for the BOLO info. Is that a Retief story? I've not read
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50 them all, I have to be in a particularly 'silly' mood for them.
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51 My head is starting to hurt from the strain of this long
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52 telepathic comunication. Ciao (oops!)#
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53 ::::::::::::::::::O O::::::::voyeur::::::::O O::::::::::::::::::::::::
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54 ????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????
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55 Voyeur:in communicating with the Bard over a strange and wonderful medium
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56 known as the "telephone" he stated that he would have wanted to solve said
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57 riddle himself.oh well,you` are correct in the name of the cat also.you
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58 seem to have an enormus store of knowledge,so for you...
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59 how long does process c-41 take and at what temp??
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60 ha!!!
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61 A somewhat disgrunted
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62 Man in Gray
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63 ????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????
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64 pppppppppppppppppppppppppppppppppppppppppppppppppppppppppppppppppppppppppppp
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65 To all: It looks like our wizard is on the ball! (I'm glad that someone
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66 can answer the questions -- I'm typing this at 5:00 AM and things get kind
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67 of fuzzy around the edges.)
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68 Bard: I have commited this Saturday to my young one. It gets difficult
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69
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70 to break a date with a 4-year old. They do not accept excuses. When is
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71 the next meeting? (This time I'll mark it on the calendar and reserve
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72 that time!)
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73 Deborah: I haven't seen you trying to stir up an arguement for a while!
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74 Let's get a topic going -- how about mixing morality into our adventure?
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75 We should probably get out of Oz and break new ground somewhere. Perhaps
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76 in a Fundamentalist Christian Universe where prayer is compulsory in public
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77 schools and teachers who are not devout enough are stoned in the schoolyard
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78 by the administration? (When I taught school I made it a matter of
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79 principle never to get stoned on school property!)
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80 ----------------------------------------------------------------------------
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81 The piper asked his compainions as they stood in the wizard's room,
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82 "Do you have enough information to go on? I am unable to complete the
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83 mental exercises and must depent upon your knowlege and guidance in these
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84 wizardly matters. I can help, but someone must furnish direction!"
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85 pppppppppppppppppppppppppppppppppppppppppppppppppppppppppppppppppppppppppppp
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86 Ah, the sight of all these words of wisdom and great humor have fired
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87 the great inferno of thought. I'd rather not visit this neat place
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88 where you get stoned just for not conforming. When 'I' was in school
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89 you got stoned to be a non-conformist, my how times do change!
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90 As for all this talk of fees for usage, please, oh great Sysop in the
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91 sky, keep it just as it is! A poor and starving person { such as myself}
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92 could not possibly say enougxh about the advantages of free time. While
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93 I'm new at this, it rhelps to see others in their natural environs and
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94 learn. Without the use of FREE systems there is no chance to learn!
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95 I thank you all! FINI FIN
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96 ********************************************************************************
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97 M. d'Autun: Surely you are familiar with TPC? As anyone who has ever seen
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98 James Coburn in "The President's Analyst" could tell you, TPC is a most dread
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99 organization! (T.P.C. = The Phone Company)
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100 ********************************************************************************
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101 Mr. Peckinpah, I must correct thee. Tandy cannot possibly have anything to do
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102 with reality pills! They are a non-patentable item! And in any case, no one on
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103 Earth knows how they are made. They were brought here by an alien race.
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104 (it is a VERY long story)
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105 ..............................the apprentice....................................
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106 Voyeur: please refrain from answering my questions before I get to them!
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107 As for the BOLO stories, they are NOT silly. They have nothing to do
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108 with Retief (well, they are mentioned in passing a couple of times, but that's
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109 it). If the only Laumer you have read are the Retief stories, you have a
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110 somewhat skewed idea of his writing. He is quite capable of writing serious
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111 stories.
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112 ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
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113 Piper: the meetings are every OTHER Saturday, thus the next meeting is April 7th
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114 (if nothing happens!)
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115 ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
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116 "Mckane AGAIN!" shouted bard, (the following is translated from
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117 a WIDE variety of languages) "May maledictions follow this nameless one to the
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118 uttermost depths of world slime, may he have a long life in interesting times,
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119 ......." after a bit he paused, "Sorry, but he is beginning to get on my nerves!
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120 Everywhere we turn -- there he is! That, that... OH! HIS PARENTS WERE BROTHERS!"
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121 ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
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122 When I calm down I'll apologize to any one I've offended....
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123 ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
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124 Rogues In a Nation (Steeleye Span)
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125 Farewell to all our Scottish fame
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126 Farewell our ancient glory
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127 Farewell even to our Scottish name
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128 Sae famed in martial story
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129 Now sark runs o'er the Solway sands
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130 And tween runs to the ocean
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131 To mark where England's province stands
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132 Such a parcel of rogues in a nation.
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133
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134 What force or guile could not subdue
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135 Through many warlike ages
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136 Is wrought now by a coward few
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137 For hireling traitor's wages
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138 The English steel we could disdain
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139 Secure in valour's station
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140 But English gold has been our bane
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141 Such a parcel of rogues in a nation.
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142
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143 Oh would ere I had seen the day
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144 That treason thus could sell us
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145 My auld grey head had lain in clay
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146 With Bruce and loyal Wallace
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147 But pith and power til my last hour
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148 I'll make this declaration
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149 We were bought and sold for English gold
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150 Such a parcel of rogues in a nation.
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151 ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~BARD~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
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152
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153 RYRYRYRYRYRYRYRYRYRYRYRYRYRYRYRYRYRYRYRYRYRYRYRYRYRYRYRYRYRYRYRYRYRYRRYRYRYRYRYR
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154 the following is a partial transcript of a conversation between M. d'Autun and
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155 his secretary:
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156 M:Any messages while I was out?
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157 S:Yes, sir. The Department of Motor Vehicles says that the license # of
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158 the company limo hasn't been issued yet. The police wanted the correct license
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159 number for the stolen vehicle report.
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160 Sir, when I called back, they couldn't find the case number....
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161 M: (muttering, possibly "it figures")
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162 S:Anyway, you got a call from immigration, something about a visa problem...
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163 M: (wearily)Anything else?
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164 S:Yes, sir. I can't get the Telex to work, so I haven't been able to send
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165 those messages.
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166
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167 ...............
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168 As you can see, we are preceding according to plan. The only way
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169 d'Autun will be able to get a msg thru is by going in person. (of course, he may
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170 have some trouble with his reservations...) All bank accounts have been diverted
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171 but there are large cash reserves in various locations.
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172 MacHinery
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173 Portland mgr
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174 RYRYRYRYRYRYRYRYRYRYRYRYRYRYRYRYRYRYRYRYRYRYRYRYRYRYRYRYRYRYRYRYRYRYRYRYRYRYRYRY
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175 !~!~!~!~!~!~!~!~!~!~!~!~!~!~!~!~!~!~!~!~!~!~!~!~!~!~!~!~!~!~!~!~!~!~!~!~!~!~
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176 After bushwacking through the forest for several hours, we finally
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177 reached the city's wall. The wall was your standard Ozish blue -- smooth
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178 with no outcroppings or cracks visible, approxiamtely 18' high. A sign
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179 hung on it:
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180 "TRESPASSERS WILL BE TURNED INTO FROGS"
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181 I turned to Wassir; "O.K. wise guy, this was your bright idea. What
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182 do we do now?" With an impish grin he pulled a length of rope and grappling
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183 hook from beneath his tunic. He proceeded to toss it to the top of the wall
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184 where it held fast. We rapidly climbed up and over to the other side.
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185 Once inside the city we were confronted by an alley running eastbound.
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186 No inhabitants were visible. Stealthily we moved down the alley to what
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187 appeared to be a main thoroughfare. Peeking around the corner we spied
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188 beings of all shapes and sizes. Munchins and elves and even little people
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189 made of china. All had one thing in common--they were wearing blue-tinted
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190 glasses.
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191 I whispered to Wassir; "We can't go out these. Without those funny
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192 looking shades, we'll be recognized in a second."
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193 Wassir moved to a storm drain at the edge of the alley and pried up
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194 the grating. "I know. The only way to go is down."
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195 "We can't go down there. There's probably all kinds of rats, snakes,
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196 and spiders lurking for us." <Shudder>
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197 "Can it Salazar. Any dufus knows the best way to reach the wizard's
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198 lair is through the underground tunnels." I looked down into the darkened
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199 hole and felt my anxiety rising.
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200 We climbed down into the tunnel and closed the grate behind us. The
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201 tunnel was lit by smoking torches held in sconces every 100'. After fifteen
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202 minutes we were hopelessly lost. I knew we were in big trouble.
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203 After a couple of hours of roaming, we stopped to rest. Wassir played
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204 a mournful tune on his recorder; whilst I daydreamed about Serena. Suddenly
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205 the tramping of many boot-shod feet and the clanking of weapons broke our
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206 reveries. At the far end of the passageway several foul-looking Orcs
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207 appeared.
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208 Wassir tried the friendly approach: "Hi guys, could you tell us where
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209 the nearest bathroom is?" Friendly isn't in the Orc vocabulary. With
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210 blood-curdling warcries they charged, weapons drawn. Instantly my magna-
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211 ported .44 was in my fist, spitting lead at the subhuman monsters that
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212 attacked us. Wassir's trench knife took care of those that got too close.
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213 When my gun was empty, I grabbed a fallen sword and joined in hand to hand
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214 combat... Blood lust in my heart.
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215 More Orcs began to pour into the passageway. I shouted "RUN!!!" Wassir
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216 and I sprinted through the twisting tunnels. Our pursuers close at our
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217 heels. Just as we started to outdistance them, we were cut off by a deadend
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218 We turned to fight our final battle. This was it.
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219 As the Orcs edges closer, a voice rang in out brains: #Big ones in
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220 deep do-do, we will help# Suddenly, the floor dropped from our feet. We
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221 fell a short distance and then started rolling down a steep incline. We
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222 ended up in a heap in a strange room. Arcane instruments and musty leather-
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223 bound books lined the walls. At the far end of the room several
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224 outlandishly dressed people stood staring at us in disbelief. One was
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225 different from the rest. He had an aura of mystical and ageless power. I
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226 glanced at Wassir. He dreww himself to his feet... a childish glint in his
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227 eye. He piped up:
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228 "Hello Mr. Wizard..."
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229 !~!~!~!~!~!~!~!~!~!~!~!~!~!~!~!~!~!~!~!~!~!~!~!Valinor!~!~!~!~!~!~!~!~!~!~!~
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230 !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
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231 My dearest Leroy;
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232 I also have noticed an unusual activity on the international and
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233 domestic espionage scene. Of course all that has passed between us has just
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234 been a slight misunderstanding. My resources will be at your disposal to
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235 combat the mysterious interloper. If indeed it is The Phone Company, we
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236 may be in deep do-do. As I am currently in an alternate reality, Serena
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237 will be contacting you shortly regarding our alliance.
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238 Mohammed Wassir
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239 <A Really Nice Albanian>
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240 P.S. If this is a trick, you're going to be in deep <Expletive Deleted>.
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241 !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
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242 -----------------------------------------------------------------
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243 ^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^
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244 Back to the real world...
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245 Has anyone heard of a book called P-1??? (May be wrong spelling)
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246 It was a science-fiction book concerning computers written several
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247 years back.
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248
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249 ---------------------->unsigned<--------------------------------
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250 =-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-
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251 I havent heard of it. I would like all of you to know that working
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252 all spring vacation is the pits. I know a lot of you out there have
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253 left school, but for those who aren't, how are you all spending
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254 your vacation?
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255 Bo
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256 =-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-
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257 ^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^
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258 I must ask myself "What is reality? And why use pills?" I thought that
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259 all people lived there. Much confusion and anguish! Well, since we're
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260 going down illuusion lane we may as well enjoy it! Channel 002- Who
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261 was Duey Duck? And I might add "Why a duck?" F. Fin - CPAL
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262 *~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~
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263 Dearest Leroy;
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264 Mohammed asked me to contact you about the mysterious new power on the
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265 spy scene. I have little information other than they seem to have control
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266 of AP wire services and most data communications networks. Various state,
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267 federal and international enforcement agencies seem to be in the dark.
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268 You can reach me at Salazar's office in Old Town. Be discrete. Salazar
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269 would be very angry if he knew I was working for Wassir again. If you have
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270 time drop by. Bring a donkey; I'll supply the trapeze set.
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271 Anxiously,
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272 Serena
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273 *~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~
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274
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275 ___________________________________________________________________________
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276 Apprentice: My apologies, but with Tandy's formidable marketing power, the
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277 aliens you spoke of chose us as the sole distributer of the reality pills.
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278 We were still in FDA testing phase when we became aware of the unauthorized
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279 use of the still-not-completely-tested pills. Our concern is due to the fact
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280 that advance use by non-testing agents of the pill have hurt our chances
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281 of getting it approved for general sale. It has also hust our standing with
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282 the FDA, who up until this point we have had a good relationship with.
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283
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284 Our references with the aliens are quite secure, and our records are
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285 available for public inspection under the Freedom of Information Act. Any
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286 sensitive material has been removed from the public record of course.
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287 Thank you for your memo.
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288
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289 Sam Peckinpah
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290 Reality Corp div of Tandy Corp.
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291 _________________________________________________________________________
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292
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293 !@@#@$$%#%$^%&*^&(&**%^&^%$#%^%&^&*^&(&*)&*(^&*%^&#^!%#$%#$%#$^$%^$%^#
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294 The book in question is the "Adolesence of P1". Required reading for
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295 computer scientists and others interested in the subject. The copy I
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296 read had been passed around amoung a large group of current and former
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297 PSU students, and is complete with dog-eared edges and all.
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298 %$^%$#^$%^$%^$%^$% L'Homme sans parity @$#%$%%#$%^$%^$%#$%#$%#$%%#$%%%
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299
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300 '`'`'`'`'`'`'`'`'`'`'`'`'`'`'`'`'`'`'`'`'`'`'`'`'`'`'`'`'`'`'`'`'`'`'`'`
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301
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302 Hehehehehe! I see my pretties have made it to the wizard's lair. My plans
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303 are going perfectly! hehehehehehe (cackle) I have vowed revenge on
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304 Dorothy and her gang and any who she might call a friend ever since she
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305 took out 2 of my sisters! hehhehehehehehe (cackle) My other dippy sister
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306 doesn't care about anything except her skin and her modeling contract
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307 with that agency in NY city. But I will get them, and dorothy, and anyone
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308 else who dares enter OZ without my permission! hehehehehehehe (cackle)
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309 I must be careful though, because like it or not, the wizard is powerful,
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310 and he can cause me great pain. BUT BEWARE!!! HERE COMES DEEP DO-DO!!!
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311 hehehehehehehehehe (cackle) heheheheheheheheheh (cackle) etc etc etc...
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312
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313 '`'`'`'`'`'`'`'`'`'`'`'`'`'`'`'`'`'`'`'`'`'`'`'`'`'`'`'`'`'`'`'`'`'`'`'`
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314
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315 S:HOW ARE YOU DOING TODAY?
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316 M:SAME AS YOU WON'T BE TOMORROW!!
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317 -=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=
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318 @#$!#@$%$%&^$&%*$)*&$&@!^$#*!!%$#$^%^*@!
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319
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320 ----------------------------------------------------------------------------
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321 From: Orc Fieldmarshal 4
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322 To: Orc HQ
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323 Re: Human Invasion, Sector 14B
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324
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325 All hail:
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326
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327 At 1415 a large invasion party of heavily armed humans attacked our recon
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328 party in Sector 14B. Descriptions of leaders are as follows:
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329 #1. Big floppy ears, idiotic grin, bears a strong resemblence to
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330 Alfred E. Neuman
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331 #2. Tall man in khaki; brown hair, BIG gun
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332 Subjects lead a party of at least 50-100 of those vile, smelly humans that
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333 attacked our peaceful recon party without warning or provocation.
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334 Casualties to our forces were a mere 17 Orcs. Reinforcements arrived in the
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335 nick of time to repulse the invaders. Casualties inflicted by our heroic
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336 forces to the humans were heavy. No body count available.
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337
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338 Request further reinforcements to launch an all out attack against humans.
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339 We will take no prisoners.
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340 Respectfully,
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341 Gnartic the Putrid
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342 ----------------------------------------------------------------------------
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343 !()?()!()!??()!)()?
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344 #Wizard! What are ORCS doing roaming the streets of the Emerald City?#
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345 The Mysterious Voice
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346 !()?()!()?()!()?
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347 :::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::
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348 Bard: mea culpa mea culpa...
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349 MIG: The info on C-41 is in another room, where my father is sleeping.
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350 As it is 01:36, I won't have access to it until manana.
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351 Rumor has it that you have 5 aliases currently. How prolific!
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352 I have enough trouble with 1!
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353 :::::::::::::::::::::O O::::::::voyeur::::::::O O:::::::::::::::::::::
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354 _(#%^_%(^_(%^_%^_(#*%^_#^%_(#%_(#*%^_@#%^_@%^_(%^_#(%^#_%
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355 Mysterious Voice:
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356 They were in another adventure and one apparently sneezed while trying
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357 to say "XYZZY" and you know the rest.
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358 fdud, fdntf
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359 _@$^#($^_@^*^)&)#$)@$^)@$&@$#^%!)@%)%_@$%_@_%$@#%^@(^$)@&^)@
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360 ::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::
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361 "and what may I do for you little timmy??" said mr.wizard in a voice that made them wonder to what sex the
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362 wizard was...
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363 canting his head to one side he looked deep in thought and muttered "orcs,in my city hummm" after which he was seen
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364 preping for a major spellcasting saying magical words like "DDT" and "EDB"
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365 :::::::::::::WIZARD:::::::::::::
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366
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367 ???????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????
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368 Voyeur,you could have at least hinted at what C-41 was,you make me think you have to actualy LOOK UP the info...
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369 you have also overlooked 2 key factors;
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370 a:when this and other messages from you appear on the backwater.
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371 b:when certon people access the bit bucket where I just put up the message about 5 identitys today(tonight)
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372 c:the bit bucket has user files,I believe if you type l,your user number say...293 as an offhand guess it would tell you when
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373 you were last on.
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374 perhaps I have met you before? perhaps again on saturday?
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375
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376
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377 Sans Parity:(de de du da)*2 zonette???
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378
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379 Jonithan Chance,Cap'n Crazy,commander Lacells:hope you all had fun at Robbies watching vids while I slaved over my new operatin
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380 system.
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381
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382 Bard:what say next week we kill Jonithan Chance once and for all,perhaps the apprentice will come allong too??
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383
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384
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385 Deborah,d,anybody:I await a subject folks...
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386
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387 A somewhat giddie from lack of sleep...
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388 Man in Gray
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389
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390 ?????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????
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391 --------------------------------
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392 Hay you,out there in the cold,getting lonely getting old,can you feel me?
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393 Hay you standing in the ailes with itchy feet and aching smiles,can you feel me?
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394 Hay you,don't help them to bury the light!!!
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395 Dont give in,without a fight.
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396 (musical interlude)
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397 But it was only fantasy,the wall was too high,as you can see.
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398 No matter how he tried,he could not break free,and the Worms ate into his brain...
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399
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400 wall lp
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401 side 1 albium 2 trac 1
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402 -------------FLOYD--------------
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403
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404 ppppppppppppppppppppppppppppppppppppppppppppppppppppppppppppppppppppppppppppppp
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405 The piper watched the action with disbelief. Vast tides of power shifted
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406 and pulled at the present reality. Another blending took place, it seemed that
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407 middle earth was grafted into the sewers of Oz. (It also seems that the
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408 person doing the grafting was color-blind! While the graft was being done,
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409 the distinction between blue and green disappeared.) As the color non-red
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410 faded into blues and greens, the piper sensed that a powerful conflict was in
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411 the making. Thinking to warn the peacful inhabitants of the city, he stepped
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412 out the door and nearly into the jaws of an immense tiger with a pink ribbon
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413 tied in a bow on its tail. Stopping short, the piper decided to be VERY polite
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414 indeed. The tiger yawned and stretched -- those teeth must be five inches
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415 long! -- then asked in a rather bored voice, "Where are you going little man?"
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416 and continued, "You wouldn't happen to have any fat babies with your party
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417 would you? I'm getting hungry again and havent eaten a fat baby for a long,
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418 long time." The piper breathed a sigh of relief.
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419 "You must be the Hungry Tiger. Quick! We must let everyone know that
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420 trouble is brewing. Someone has grafted the reality of middle-earth onto the
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421 sewers of Oz. Not only does there seem to be a party of Orcs approaching, I'm
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422 sure we'll see trolls, wolves, and other creatures trying to get in.
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423 The tiger yawned again and said "Don't worry, little man. We have coped
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424 with worse situations in the last 80 years. This is the kind of place that
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425 someone is always tring to but in on. Now you just get back to your own
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426 adventure and we'll keep it off our streets.
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427 The piper somehow found himself turned around and propelled gentluy through
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428 the door by a velvet paw against his back. As the door shut, he heard a VERY
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429 deep voice saying, "I know, but it's not FAIR to let a wicked witch in who
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430 only saw the movie. She would not know enough to be worth worryi.." THUNK
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431 pppppppppppppppppppppppppppppppppppppppppppppppppppppppppppppppppppppppppp
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432 IS THERE ANYBODY IN THERE?
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433 JUST NOD IF YOU CAN HEAR ME...
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434
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435 Nod
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436 YOU GUY'S ARE ALL NUTS! SIGNED: THE MANAGEME
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437 ................................................................................
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438 Mr. Peckinpah: I suggest you check out the aliens more carefully! Those blue
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439 lobsters were trying to conquer your world by using the "side-effects" of the
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440 pills!
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441 I *can* supply documentation, if neccesary!
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442 ................................
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443 The apprentice pulled a crystal ball (actually, more of a marble)
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444 from his pouch. He looked into it and spoke, "I'd like to place a mage to witch
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445 call to Glinda the Good..."
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446 "Greetings, Your Wisdom, I am honored that you have accepted this
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447 contact", without moving a muscle the apprentice gave the impression of having
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448 made a deep and courtly bow. "While I realize that your people can handle the
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449 orcs quite well, I feel that we owe you some aid. They are almost certainly
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450 here because of us."
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451 "I know of some people who can remove these creatures with a minimum of
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452 disturbance. In any case, I must notify my liege of this intrusion, no matter
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453 what your decision."
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454 "I will await your decision. Ciao."
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455 He made a gesture and the sense of another's presence faded. He replaced
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456 the ball and took out a ring which he placed on his third finger.
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457 #Pentagram HQ. Please state your business#
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458 #I am Eric of the House of Camber. I must speak to Lord Sam the Grey.
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459 I have news of an orcish invasion.#
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460 #Immediately, sir!#
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461 #What is this about an invasion, lad? This had better be important!#
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462 #Look into my mind, milord...............#
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463 #I see, we'll be there SOON!#
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464 #But, lord, what of..#
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465 #I *SAID* we ARE COMING! I know little of this "Oz" place, but if
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466 there are orcs, then we are going to get them - do you understand APPRENTICE?#
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467 #yes, your lordship#
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468
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469 "I was afraid of that.... Wizard, your pardon, but my liege is determined
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470 to come. It was my duty to inform him, but I fear the consequences". The
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471 apprentice seem very small as he stood waiting.
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472 While everyone was trying to decide how to handle this new devolopment,
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473 a figure seemed to materialize out of the air in front of Wassir and Salazar.
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474 They reached for their weapons, only to discover that the figure had them in his
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475 hands! "You two looked like the most trigger happy, so I relieved you of these
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476 toys. You couldn't of done any real damage, but I didn't want to waste half an
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477 hour healing up."
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478 "Allow me to introduce my self, the name is Sam. Some of my Pentagram
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479 colleagues are returning the orcs n' tunnels to OUR world. We can take care of
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480 them there." Turning to the apprentice, he said, "Now look, I thought I told you
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481 to try and stay out of trouble! You're almost as bad as your father. Try not to
|
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482 end up like he did, OK?"
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483 Tossing the weapons back to their owners, he started to fade out again, "Mouse
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484 is gonna love this, fresh orcs....."
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485 ............................................the apprentice......................
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486 ps to Mr Peckinpah: the pills are not patentable, because they were desribed in
|
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487 open literature more than 10 years before the application was filed! Check with
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488 your legal section!
|
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489 ................................................................................
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490 RYRYRYRYRYRYRYRYRYRYRYRYRYRYRYRYRYRYRYRYRYRYRYRYRYRYRYRYRYRYRYRYRYRYRYRYRYRYRYRY
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491 NETWORK
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492 NET central
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493
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494 McKane Enterprises
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495 c/o M d'Autun
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496
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497 You are cordially invited to send a representative to the PORSFIS meeting
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498 this Saturday. Main branch, Multnomah county library, 2 PM.
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499 You will be contacted there.
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500 | | || || | | || | | || || | | | || || | | || | | | || | || || | | |
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501 RYRYRYRYRYRYRYRYRYRYRYRYRYRYRYRYRYRYRYRYRYRYRYRYRYRYRYRYRYRYRYRYRYRYRYRYRYRYRYRY
|
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502 Wassir: We suggest that you have a representative there also!
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503 RYRYRYRYRYRYRYRYRYRYRYRYRYRYRYRYRYRYRYRYRYRYRYRYRYRYRYRYRYRYRYRYRYRYRYRYRYRYRYRY
|
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504 What! Someone implies that I don't have the real gem! Let's see here.
|
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505 Reaching into my trans-reality box I whip out the gem I have.
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506 Glowing a drak green, the gem speaks,"I await you command, oh fool!"
|
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507 "Then...you are the real gem?"
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508 "All but a sliver."
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509 "But....what are your powers?"
|
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510 "My powers are beyond your imagination, oh mortal!"
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511 "Then shrink lacells ship into the palm of my hand."
|
|
512 Holding my hand palm up, I notice a miniture ship has materialized.
|
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513 Just what I need! Opening up my trans-reality box, I chuck it into one of
|
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514 the realities that the box services. This gem scares me. Plop! I chuck the
|
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515 gem into still another reality and lock the box to my mental waves.
|
|
516 "Well then, off to see the wizard," I whisper to myself as I hop
|
|
517 into the tunnels under the city. -The Ninja-
|
|
518 WELL GUYS, I SEE YOU HAVE MADE AN ATTEMPT TO CLEAN UP THIS
|
|
519 JOKE A LITTLE BIT. LETS HAVE SOME MORE GOOD
|
|
520 MESSAGES ON HERE AND MAYBE I COULD SEE IT IN
|
|
521 MY BETTER JUDGMENT TO CALL HERE MORE OFTEN
|
|
522 . THE NEXT TIME YOU START CRYING ABOUT NOT GETTING ANY CALLERS,
|
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523 REMEMBER WHAT YOUR TRYING TO GET THEM TO READ-----GARBAGE.
|
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524
|
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525 KEEP IT CLEAN,
|
|
526 555
|
|
527
|
|
528 ________________________________________________________________________________
|
|
529 Memo to all Reality Pill Corp div of Tandy Corp distributers...
|
|
530
|
|
531 Regrettably I must inform you all the Reality Corp will cease to exist
|
|
532 as a corporate entity as of the 1, April, 1984. Our legal section, under the
|
|
533 guidance of one known as 'the apprentice' has discovered the aliens who were
|
|
534 to be our sole suppliers of the reality pill, for which your corporation was
|
|
535 formed to distribute, were merely a small outlaw faction with no real power
|
|
536 in the courts or government of the alien's ruling class.
|
|
537
|
|
538 This turn of events is rather difficult to swallow, but, as employees
|
|
539 of Tandy corp, you will not be left out in the cold by the blunders of our
|
|
540 marketing dept. Applications are being sent for re-assignment, please have
|
|
541 them filled out and turned in by 9:00 AM, March 30th, Two Tandy Towers
|
|
542 Fort Worth Texas, USE, Earth.
|
|
543
|
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544 Please put your minds at rest, and be re-assured that those in
|
|
545 marketing who are responsible for the fiasco will suffer the same fate as
|
|
546 those who had Tandy invest so heavily in CB radios, they will be forced to
|
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547 become floor managers at local Toys-R-Us outlets.
|
|
548
|
|
549 Thank you and again please accept my apologies...
|
|
550
|
|
551 Sam Peckinpah
|
|
552 (form) Reality Corp div of Tandy Corp
|
|
553
|
|
554 _______________________________________________________________________________
|
|
555
|
|
556 Aside to 'the apprentice' : The board of directors, and myself, CEO of
|
|
557 Reality corp, wish to give you our sincere thanks for pointing out the
|
|
558 aliens scam. Although we did lose some money on the deal, it is a pittance
|
|
559 compared to what would have been lost if trans-glaxian shipping routes etc,
|
|
560 would have been set up...
|
|
561 Regards...
|
|
562 Sam Packinpah
|
|
563 etc. etc.
|
|
564
|
|
565 _______________________________________________________________________________
|
|
566
|
|
567 gdfg
|
|
568 g
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|
569
|
|
570 #@!#@!$#@%^^%*&^)*()^*%^*#@$@#%^&*&^()&*(*&^%^#%!@#$#$%$#$%^&&^*&(*)(&*^&%^
|
|
571 MIG...another person recognizes the call of chris serling? (de de do da)^2
|
|
572 Yupp...its definitly another zonette!
|
|
573 !@!@@#@$#$#*%$*)($*^ L'homme sans parity %$#^*($%)^%)^%^%$^%^%^%^%^%$^%^%$^
|
|
574 PS M. D'Autun --- Have you visted Paris recently? It is really quite beautiful
|
|
575 this time of year, n'ect-ce pas?
|
|
576
|
|
577
|
|
578 C-41 IS A 4 STEP PROCES THAT RUNS
|
|
579 AT 100F +- .23DIGRES IT TAKES 25 MIN
|
|
580 AND 15 SEC TEMP IS VERY IMPORTANT
|
|
581 SO BE CAIRE FULL E-6 TAKES ABOUT
|
|
582 60 MIN AND HAS THE SAME TEMP
|
|
583 REQUIRMENTS
|
|
584
|
|
585 PROF. PENTAX
|
|
586 ZANEY ZELOTE 500
|
|
587 MIKE,HOPE I CAN GET IN TOUCH WITH YOU
|
|
588 TOMORROW WHY DONT YOU DO YOU RAIN DANCE
|
|
589
|
|
590
|
|
591
|
|
592
|
|
593
|
|
594
|
|
595
|
|
596
|
|
597
|
|
598
|
|
599
|
|
600 XXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXX
|
|
601
|
|
602 HELP!,THE OWLBEARS ARE ATTACKING!
|
|
603 DARN DOGGY DOO-DOOS WHERES
|
|
604 MY LARTHORIAN?
|
|
605
|
|
606 GRIFFONHAS JUST GOTTEN A FRONTAL
|
|
607 LOBIGER'S BRAINS ARE ALL OVER
|
|
608 AIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIGGH!GUUWHO'S BIGGER?
|
|
609 MR.BIGGER OR MISTER BIGGER'S BABY?
|
|
610
|
|
611
|
|
612 WELL ITS THE BABY BECAUSE HE IS
|
|
613 A LITTLE BIGGER!!!!!!!!!END MESSAGE,
|
|
614 FROM JAMES BOLIVAR DIGRIZ
|
|
615 TROY
|
|
616 I WILL CALL YOU AT 8:00 AM
|
|
617 TOMOROW
|
|
618 MMMMMMMMMMMMMMMM,MMMMMMMMMIKE
|
|
619 PLEASE MAKE YOUR MESSAGES MORE
|
|
620 INTERESTING ,THERE IS A MESSAGE FOR YOU
|
|
621 ON CBBS PLEASE GRANT ME THIS BOON
|
|
622 MY CAT DIED OF BOREDOM
|
|
623 ??????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????
|
|
624 my GOD!!,somebody else reads pulp science fiction...SS rat,beware
|
|
625
|
|
626 All:see you saturday!
|
|
627 Prof.Pentax:close,C-41 takes 24.5 minuts,how many times must I ask...
|
|
628
|
|
629 use spellguard!! last line folks,Man in Gray signing off,Ninja,will get to you later ?????????????????/????????????????????????
|
|
|
|
> |