textfiles/messages/ALTERREALITY/ar05.txt

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From: TURTLE
To: CORWYN OF AMBER
Subject: Life
Date & Time: 12/08/89 21:23:33
Message Number 801
Naah, Life consists primarily of four parts:
Fast cars
Fast computers
Sex
Loud music
There are a few other things worth mentioning about Life, like, say,
money, more sex, and Mountain Dew, but those are the big four.
===========
From: TURTLE
To: ROCKY
Subject: movies...
Date & Time: 12/08/89 21:30:09
Message Number 802
Hmm. I've seen Phantasm //, but never Phantasm. The biggest thing I
remember about Phantasm // was the silver balls that flew around killing
people, and the way they blew up a beautiful mint-condition 1967
Hemi 'Cuda. It was the most obscene thing I've ever seen--when that
beautiful car went up in flames, I wanted to cry. There should be a
law against things like that.
--A speed-loving Turtle
===========
From: TURTLE
To: ROCKY
Subject: GameCon
Date & Time: 12/08/89 21:32:44
Message Number 803
Quarters isn't really as much fun as Mexican...a somewhat obscure and
more complex drinking game played with two six-sided dice. It's kind of
like Liar's Poker, only with dice instead of cards, and it's a whole lot
more fun.
--A gaming-enthusiast Turtle
===========
From: TURTLE
To: ROCKY
Subject: BTW....
Date & Time: 12/08/89 21:34:30
Message Number 804
Okay, okay, I'll bite. (And no, I'm not a snapping turtle!) Turtle
is, of course, unique, but most closely resembles a large, anthro-
pomorphic version of a Southeast Asian wood turtle. He's brown and
orange, with orange highlights on his shell. And he is, naturally, a
hard-rock Turtle (a particular sub-species of Turtle, you understand,
which is kind of silly since Turtle's species has no other members and
he is therefore not only unique, but a unique sub-species of his own
species as well...Never mind.)
--A hard-rocking fast-driving one-of-a-kind Turtle!!
===========
From: TURTLE
To: ROCKY
Subject: Yarg! Yarg!
Date & Time: 12/08/89 21:39:48
Message Number 805
Yarg! Yarg! is a shorthand way of saying "Please consider the preceeding
statements to have been made with tongue in cheek, and therefore kindly
do not take the aforementioned statements excessively seriously, as they
are presented for your amusement only and do not necessarily reflect the
opinions, attitudes, or beliefs of the person making them, or reality,
for that matter."
===========
From: QTIP
To: TURTLE
Subject: Life
Date & Time: 12/08/89 22:28:42
Message Number 806
tURTLE,  You forgot BOATS.. and why can'"Mt {_Iback up w
with this thing--- NO REVERSE????????Gads. How uncontrolable.
All mistakes are hopeless!Yikes. Its another one way
line by line mono-directional TRAP! You toitle !
===========
From: QTIP
To: TURTLE
Subject: Chat
Date & Time: 12/08/89 22:47:46
Message Number 807
Great. I'll see what I can find and try to upload a couple of zipped pr
programs that I enjoy. Gee, we'll hav e to get you auto warp for
Christmas!!
===========
From: SPELLWIND
To: ROCKY
Subject: Phantasm
Date & Time: 12/08/89 23:52:39
Message Number 808
I don't think you realize whaat the special FX teams do to make those
balls seem to fly. Am I the only one here that actually KNOWS what these
FX people go through? Whew, where do I begin?
===========
From: SPELLWIND
To: ROCKY
Subject: GameCon
Date & Time: 12/08/89 23:57:55
Message Number 809
Pente is a game this archdemon almost remembers...
===========
From: SPELLWIND
To: ROCKY
Subject: Drunk
Date & Time: 12/08/89 23:59:04
Message Number 810
I wouldn't dare drink too much, I get very violent when I'm drunk.
(got that from my long-dead alcoholic father)
===========
From: RUFUS
To: ROCKY
Subject: movies...
Date & Time: 12/09/89 01:08:39
Message Number 812
One of my favorites from Heavy Metal was the one where the secretary is
"kidnapped." I laughed my head off at the whole thing.
"If it's one thing I know how to do, it's drive when I'm stoned."
===========
From: RUFUS
To: ROCKY
Subject: My Brother?
Date & Time: 12/09/89 01:11:19
Message Number 813
You know what I'd like to see with the Trumps? GTE Services. Like
Trump Waiting
Trump Forwarding
and of course, an answering Trump "Sorry, but Corwin is not available at
this time, but if you'd like to leave a message, he will get back to you
as soon as possible. Don't hold your breath." BEEP
===========
From: RUFUS
To: SPELLWIND
Subject: Phantasm
Date & Time: 12/09/89 01:15:16
Message Number 814
Do you know how much work a beaver does to build a damn? First they
have to decide where to put the damn. Next they form commitees on what
the enviromental impact will be, what the benefits will be, etc..etc..
Next they have to secure a building permit from the 'Beaver Builders of
America', then they build. First they have to get the raw materials.
They either have to gnaw down trees and other items, or they learn
to drive, and go down to Home Depot and buy the stuff. But do you know
the kinda looks beavers get when they ask "Scuse me sir, where's the
cement at? Oh yea, we need a chain saw, and a few dozen 2 x 4s"
Anyways, once they get the materials, they have to build. This means
they gotta put up safety nets, deal with unions, vacations, and
sometimes a strike or two. And once it is built, they have to dedicate
it to someone. Since "The Jerry Mathers Memorial Damn" has been used
about 40 times, they have to really think of a good name. After it's
been built and named, they have to have the ribbon cutting ceremony.
Unfortunatly(sp?), they can't use scissors to well, so they gnaw the
ribbon, which is usually plastic, so they ingest the plastic, and die!
Turtle, how'z that?? I gotta work on my Turtle posts and timed writings
===========
From: CYBERPUNK
To: BEATLE
Subject: ChristmasCon
Date & Time: 12/09/89 07:16:05
Message Number 816
well, hummm, it's not really planned out yet, but i would have some
animated cartoon features like Robotech II:The Sentinels, and Captain
Harloc. and I would teach who ever wanted to play the Robotech game on
Tylers board how to do it.. and a whole lot of other things, like humm..
we would hide Rufus's prt rubber chicken etc.. hehehe just jokin' Rufus
!! heheh but it would be like RufusCon kinda, a whole bunch of computer
freaks trying to have fun!! hehehe
Cy
===========
From: CYBERPUNK
To: CHIP P. UNICORN
Subject: ChristmasCon
Date & Time: 12/09/89 07:22:15
Message Number 817
well, ya, that's what will happen, we will have a homemade bomb contest
and instead of a rudabega, we would have my IBM!! hehehehe NOT! but we
would have animation stuff and such forth... okie dokie>
?
Cy
===========
From: CYBERPUNK
To: KALI
Subject: What? An Indoor
Date & Time: 12/09/89 07:26:03
Message Number 818
how about Club Mary?? hehehehe
Cy
===========
From: CYBERPUNK
To: ROCKY
Subject: BTW....
Date & Time: 12/09/89 07:29:30
Message Number 819
he's a Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtle hehehe
Cy
===========
From: RUFUS
To: CYBERPUNK
Subject: ChristmasCon
Date & Time: 12/09/89 11:55:02
Message Number 821
Listen, no one touches the rubber chicken without my permision (sp? Arg
my head is clogged up, and my brain is running like a ZX-81 ). But
he could use a good stretch, he's been watching the computer for the pas
week.
===========
From: PSYCHE
To: ROCKY
Subject: GameCon
Date & Time: 12/09/89 13:01:47
Message Number 822
Yeah, I have played, and still do play occasionally, Pente. It's
really a fun game, but since I have not played it enough to get good
at it, I tend to look for something else to play after I lose the first
game. But it's a possibility...
===========
From: SAURON
To: TURTLE
Subject: Bah!
Date & Time: 12/09/89 14:01:26
Message Number 823
Precisely!
===========
From: SAURON
To: CORWYN OF AMBER
Subject: catchy slogans
Date & Time: 12/09/89 14:02:24
Message Number 824
Catchy slogans? What shall we say then about"pro-choice"? Shall we
extend the "choice" to one hour before the end of the second trimester?
...or maybe one hour after birth? When-precisely??
This whole debate has become so pointless, I see no gain to be made by
continuing it. Neither side is going to flex an inch, and until we can
eliminate all the forked-tongue rhetoric, euphisms, and hypocrisy,
that's how it will remain.
===========
From: SAURON
To: CRYSTAL
Subject: Used Cars
Date & Time: 12/09/89 14:11:12
Message Number 825
I absolutely agree! Hysterical. Kurt Russell is an under-rated
talent.
===========
From: SPELLWIND
To: CYBERPUNK
Subject: ChristmasCon
Date & Time: 12/09/89 17:25:55
Message Number 827
If you hve it at my house, you'll have an AAmiga 2000 and walls
covered with pictures of gory death and beautiful women...
You people'd like my house...
===========
From: CORWYN OF AMBER
To: ROCKY
Subject: My Brother?
Date & Time: 12/09/89 18:19:20
Message Number 828
Yep.. You may have to paint yourself a new trump to get a hold of me,
(it might have 359-1717 in a corner somewhere) As I am trying to
contact Oberon between 5:00 and 11:00 please don't interrupt my
concentration then, he's out there somewhere! I shall return to the
courts of chaos if it is possible some time in the near future, but of
course as time flows more slowly here.. it may seem a while to you. The
best bet is to trump me directly.. try it soon..
- Corwin
===========
From: CORWYN OF AMBER
To: TURTLE
Subject: Life
Date & Time: 12/09/89 18:25:02
Message Number 829
Fast cars: an extra
Fast computers: assumed
sex = (sex) cookies & Rock 'n Roll
Loud music = sex, cookies and (Rock 'n Roll)
Sex is first... (implying your more sex addition..)
Cookies has sometimes been modified to include pizza.. but
this ruins the rythm.
Mountain Dew.. OK I left something out...
- Corwyn (Known in some shadows as Confucious [aka Confuse-us])
===========
From: CORWYN OF AMBER
To: RUFUS
Subject: My Brother?
Date & Time: 12/09/89 18:32:48
Message Number 830
Talk to Ghostwheel... Your freindly local trump equipped computer
switchboard.
- Corwyn
===========
From: CORWYN OF AMBER
To: SAURON
Subject: catchy slogans
Date & Time: 12/09/89 18:35:36
Message Number 831
I HATE THAT ANSWER!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Let's see: "We're having trouble with our terms, so let's not talk
about it anymore."
Or: "We're not going to convince each other.. so let's stop talking
about it."
How many real discussions would continue if everyone took this position
I'm sorry if you're so close minded that you don't think anyone else's
argument will ever affect you.. I don't see how anyone can ever be that
sure of themselves.. (I call it smug self-confidence that you are OF
COURSE absolutely correct.)
- Corwyn
===========
From: CYBERPUNK
To: RUFUS
Subject: ChristmasCon
Date & Time: 12/09/89 20:08:33
Message Number 832
hey, it's ok, don't make you head explode now!! ack! i was just joking!
no!, dont'!!! aagggrrghjjj *BLAM* hehehehhee
CY
===========
From: CYBERPUNK
To: SPELLWIND
Subject: ChristmasCon
Date & Time: 12/09/89 20:10:40
Message Number 833
ya, sounds like an interesting place, well, i dunno, whatever
*BURP* x cuse me !
CY
===========
From: SPELLWIND
To: HMMMM
Subject: sigh...
Date & Time: 12/09/89 22:24:20
Message Number 834
Love: When spring is in the air and it's dead winter.
An Archdemon with someone he'd die for if she asked,
Spellwind
(P.S. The books on postpont for now...wow)
===========
From: TURTLE
To: QTIP
Subject: Life
Date & Time: 12/10/89 03:20:02
Message Number 835
>...You forgot BOATS...
No, not really. Boats (unless they're /really fast,/ like, say, Scarabs
or Checkmates) rank right up there with studying wall charts of
tonsils for excitement. (Although I did get the unique experience of
riding in a Checkmate at about 70 miles per driven by the capable,
if reckless, insane, and demented, hands of a friend of mine once...I
almost wet my pants.) For the necessities of life, boats rank right
after disposable cameras but right before rubber chickens.
--A dry-land Turtle
===========
From: TURTLE
To: QTIP
Subject: Chat
Date & Time: 12/10/89 03:23:52
Message Number 836
>...we'll have to get you auto warp for Christmas!!
No thanks, I'm quite warped enough already!
--A rp Turtle
a e
w d
===========
From: TURTLE
To: SPELLWIND
Subject: Drunk
Date & Time: 12/10/89 03:25:29
Message Number 837
>...I get very violent when I'm drunk.
Gosh, and I only get...well, like I am, only more so. Hmm...
===========
From: TURTLE
To: RUFUS
Subject: Beavers
Date & Time: 12/10/89 03:26:20
Message Number 838
Well, you're getting there, kid. Admittedly, I'm not quite sure what
you'll do when you actually *do* arrive...possibly set up a nice cafe,
with pastel-colored curtains in the windows and a small, patient child
who tries inexorably to remove the cat's tail (which isn't really a
problem if it's a reasonably patient cat, or one that believes in
turnabout as fair play, considering how often it has the small child's
tongue (which is to say, often enough that he is unable to respond when
his teacher asks him a question (no that that's any great loss or any-
thing, seeing how they're usually fairly pointless questions (like
"Who invented America?" and "If you had ten fingers, and you put them
in a mailbox, then how much postage would a penguin require to fly to
last Tuesday?" (you see, drug abuse by professional instructors of
young and budding minds is a sadly neglected crisis in this country
(as is the ever-growing menace of imported "Buy American" bumper
stickers))))) and cause her to believe she's ignoring him (which he
really is, but that's beside the point) and send him to the principal's
office)), and maybe some nice potted plants.
===========
From: TURTLE
To: CORWYN OF AMBER
Subject: Life
Date & Time: 12/10/89 03:38:50
Message Number 839
Confucious say...too damn much.
===========
From: TURTLE
To: SPELLWIND
Subject: sigh...
Date & Time: 12/10/89 03:39:43
Message Number 840
Love: A grave mental illness.
--Plato
Love: The wonderful period between meeting the most beautiful woman in
the world and finding out she looks like a haddock.
--Ambrose Bierce
Love: A bloody pain in the ass.
--Robert Byrne
Survey says...
===========
From: SPELLWIND
To: TURTLE
Subject: sigh...
Date & Time: 12/10/89 05:46:02
Message Number 841
I feel NO pain..
===========
From: SPELLWIND
To: >
Subject: Anything Goes
Date & Time: 12/10/89 05:47:46
Message Number 842
===========
From: TURTLE
To: SPELLWIND
Subject: Anything Goes
Date & Time: 12/10/89 13:09:39
Message Number 843
Come again? I didn't quite catch that.
===========
From: BEATLE
To: PSYCHE
Subject: WHY?
Date & Time: 12/10/89 15:09:54
Message Number 844
I do! and the problem is that I need good grades in high school or my
parents will kill me!
===========
From: BEATLE
To: TURTLE
Subject: sigh...
Date & Time: 12/10/89 15:19:48
Message Number 845
I would choose #3, then #1, and then #2...
It definetely is a pain in the ass...
===========
From: DONTHEN
To: SPELLWIND
Subject: sigh...
Date & Time: 12/10/89 16:30:10
Message Number 846
> I feel NO pain..
Well, it's about time you start. Are you sure you're doing it properly?
Whoops, what are we talking about again? Never mind.
===========
From: DONTHEN
To: ALL
Subject: Executive 10/78
Date & Time: 12/10/89 16:33:40
Message Number 847
I am typing this message on a bizarre terminal called the Executive
10/78. I'm not really sure what good the thing is, mind you, especially
seeing as how the backspace key doesn't really work and I have to use
ALT-H to backspace. Not ^H, you say? No, ALT-H. The other thing is,
well, the damn thing has a 3278 keyboard layout and it's an incredible
pain in the butt to type on, seeing as how the ENTER key is down by the
spacebar, the exact same way the LUIS terminals at New College are
arranged. In fact, this keyboard /is/ the same as the ones that the
LUIS terminals use; in fact, it has the same little dorky ruler line
at the bottom of the screen that lights up with little arrows and stuff
when you press different buttons. Out in the car I have another
terminal just like this one, except that it's a 5271 terminal instead of
a 3278 terminal.
GODS, why did IBM make such a stupid keyboard arrangement? This is
an incredibly nice terminal that has been rendered effectively useless
to me because of the layout it uses. AAAAAAARRRRGGGGHHHHH!!!!!
..so, anybody want to buy it?
===========
From: SPELLWIND
To: THE WORLD
Subject: sigh...
Date & Time: 12/10/89 17:00:59
Message Number 849
I sat up last night listening to Neil Diamond...
something is going on...
===========
From: CYBERPUNK
To: SPELLWIND
Subject: sigh...
Date & Time: 12/10/89 17:10:30
Message Number 850
i think you might be sick Spellwind, why dont you stay home from school
tommorow.... hehehe
Cy
===========
From: CORWYN OF AMBER
To: TURTLE
Subject: Life
Date & Time: 12/10/89 17:33:28
Message Number 851
A nicely laid out 28' Morgan w/ a diesel and two kegs of beer are
extremely pleasant companions, well OK, not as pleasant as the six or
eight girls which also belong aboard.. add an autopilot, new sails..
(What I'm missing.. besides the girls currently) and you're ready for a
quite pleasant, and enjoyable afternoon sail... Try sailing sometime..
just be sure you don't forget.. they're a necessary part of the laid
back sailing experience... Now when you're on a Hobie.. (or a J24 for
that matter.. the girl better also be a damn good sailor.. or "Wench
overboard!" ..
- Corwyn (Pleasantly Remeniscing)
===========
From: CORWYN OF AMBER
To: TURTLE
Subject: Beavers
Date & Time: 12/10/89 17:40:10
Message Number 852
NO MORE PARENTHESES.. if you must nest them, at least alternate ({[,s I
have this irresistible urge to match each parenthese and I /don't/ like
it! Stop it!
- Corwyn
===========
From: CORWYN OF AMBER
To: SPELLWIND
Subject: sigh...
Date & Time: 12/10/89 17:42:53
Message Number 853
You know you're in love when:
"You finish tossing off, and you /still/ think you love her."
- Some lame brained baseball player
===========
From: CHIP P. UNICORN
To: TURTLE
Subject: Present!
Date & Time: 12/10/89 19:58:38
Message Number 855
Hi! We wanted to drop off a slightly early Christmas present,
but nobody was home. We kept calling to try to drop it off, but
nobody answered. Are you mad at me?
I assure you -- the present will give you another religious
experience.
Chip P. Unicorn
===========
From: CYBERPUNK
To: ALL
Subject: bbs
Date & Time: 12/10/89 20:42:25
Message Number 856
hi all, i finally got my BBS functional, all i need is a phone line,
but when i get it, Cyberpunk's Fantasy World will be up for the public!
Featuring: Cyberpunks Fantasy Lounge; The Turtle Zone; Tylers Sex
Emporuim, and more!!! so if you wan this BBS to get up faster, send
donations payable to
Charles Mays
send them to
Charlie Mays
6950 Jarvis Rd.
Sarasota, Fl.
34241
Thanks!
===========
From: RUFUS
To: CYBERPUNK
Subject: bbs
Date & Time: 12/10/89 22:34:47
Message Number 857
I'll donate my lunch from Friday. Actually Cy, I just purchased a
10 meg HD, so I is broke, in fact, I'm in the red. But hey, it's
so much fun being broke..try it.
===========
From: RUFUS
To: ALL
Subject: auctions
Date & Time: 12/10/89 22:36:01
Message Number 858
If you happen to be at an auction and see Chip P. Unicorn or Raven, run
for your life. Don't look back, don't even say hello, just run.
"Does your van always feel like it's draggin a 1/2 ton?"
-Raven
===========
From: SPELLWIND
To: CYBERPUNK
Subject: sigh...
Date & Time: 12/10/89 23:07:57
Message Number 859
I don't go to school, Cyb. I'm 18.
===========
From: SPELLWIND
To: CYB
Subject: Jarvis Rd.
Date & Time: 12/10/89 23:11:58
Message Number 860
Lake Sarasota???
===========
From: CORWYN OF AMBER
To: TURTLE
Subject: in Ham Center..
Date & Time: 12/11/89 00:31:33
Message Number 861
.. A DEC mainframe.. do you know what the hell it's doing there...
Just figured you'd be the guy to ask.
- Corywn (Much into brevity these days, isn't he?)
===========
From: BARTHOLOMEW FOX
To: TURTLE
Subject: Zap!
Date & Time: 12/11/89 01:20:24
Message Number 864
Sounds like a project for next time, eh?
Anyway, I'm goin' up to the Great White North until the 29th, so I'll
B C N U
-- Fox
===========
From: BARTHOLOMEW FOX
To: ROCKY
Subject: animation
Date & Time: 12/11/89 01:25:00
Message Number 865
As for 101 Dalmations, I have a very VERY bad tape of that... almost
gives you a headache to watch. I'm waiting to see The Fox and the Hound
come out on videotape (letterboxed, I hope, but doubt).
Have you seen Rock 'n' Rule? The Demon sequence was animated by the
same people that did some of the work on The Wall. It has some really
incredible effects that can trick you into thinking you're looking at
a photographed scene (uhm... well, I mean by using video camera effects
like lens flare and limited depth of field, it seems like you're watchin
a live action film).
===========
From: BARTHOLOMEW FOX
To: BEATLE
Subject: Disney Releases
Date & Time: 12/11/89 01:28:22
Message Number 866
I really don't think Fantasia will ever make it to videotape, but then
again, I'd never have thought Bambi would go on tape, but hey... money
changes attitudes. Mitch brought Jungle Book to the Necronomicon's
FurryParty, but forgot about it until about 3am when people were packing
it in. I'd figure we'll see Peter Pan or Snow White out next... they
seem to go for what will sell the most (making me think The Fox and the
Hound won't be out for some time).
===========
From: BARTHOLOMEW FOX
To: TURTLE
Subject: Rock 'n' Rule
Date & Time: 12/11/89 01:31:49
Message Number 867
Some of the photographic-type effects can be found in Don Bluth films
and Disney films, although interestingly enough, only in the intros...
not in the body of the film. You know, the infinate depth of field
never struck me until I saw Rock 'n' Rule.
I still get a kick out of the animated lens flare in the into to the
first two seasons of Star Trek: The Next Generation...
===========
From: BARTHOLOMEW FOX
To: CORWYN OF AMBER
Subject: Wizard
Date & Time: 12/11/89 01:34:27
Message Number 868
That's not the new feature-length Nintendo comercial, is it? (grin)
I don't recognise the title...
===========
From: BARTHOLOMEW FOX
To: RUFUS
Subject: Beaver Dam
Date & Time: 12/11/89 01:39:22
Message Number 869
Biuld a "damn"? Hmm....
Anyway, look for a book called "The Cold Moons" by Aeron Clement.
Really good... and somewhat furry.
===========
From: BARTHOLOMEW FOX
To: TURTLE
Subject: Beavers
Date & Time: 12/11/89 01:41:20
Message Number 870
I kinda felt like I was reading a LISP program...
I like the imported "Buy American" bumper stickers, though. (grin)
===========
From: BARTHOLOMEW FOX
To: YOU PEOPLE/CRITTERS
Subject: The Season
Date & Time: 12/11/89 02:12:51
Message Number 871
Welp, I'm off to Ohio to experience that magnificent fable known as a
"White Christmas." I wish you all a happy Chanuka, a merry Christmas,
and/or whatever it is you celebrate this time of year. And in case I
don't make it back before the next century, have a happy and furry new
year. Or, as Juan Alfonso put it yesterday on the phone, "<snort> Er...
and have a Furry Nude Rear!" Later, all...
Yip!
===========
From: TURTLE
To: SPELLWIND
Subject: sigh...
Date & Time: 12/11/89 03:12:50
Message Number 873
>I sat up late night listening to Neil Diamond...
> something is going on...
Yeah, you're losing your taste in music.
===========
From: TURTLE
To: CORWYN OF AMBER
Subject: Life
Date & Time: 12/11/89 03:14:07
Message Number 874
I /have/ tried the sailing thang. I used to own a little Sunfish, and
I used to go Hobie Catting frequently and sailing on a 25 footer less
frequently. Notice the past tense. Sailing is boring. B O R I N G .
If I wanted R&R that was about as exciting as watching grass grow, I'd
stay home and watch grass grow; it's less expensive. I happen to /like/
excitement, adventure, and really wild things. My idea of a good time
is trying to keep a VW Bug in a flat spin from flying over a steep
embankment into a canal whilst ripping along at about 60 or so in the
dead of night. Now THAT takes skill, or else it's... BUG OVERBOARD!
--An exciting, adventurous, and really wild Turtle
===========
From: TURTLE
To: CORWYN OF AMBER
Subject: sigh...
Date & Time: 12/11/89 03:18:54
Message Number 875
You know you're in love when you walk down a hallway and step into an
elevator that isn't there, and plummet down the shaft to land in an
undignified manner upon a maintenance worker, who mistakes you for
Jesus Christ instead of a cuncussion (which would probably be a more
logical guess) and immediately tries to hand you all his money like
the nice preacher on TV told him to do, and in his haste dislodges the
small grenade in his pocket, which falls to the floor and rolls away to
find somewhere greener to be, and comes to rest on the dog, which it
promptly blows up, and you respond "Yes, I believe I will have a danish
with that today" and wander out of the shaft in a blissed-out haze,
totally unaware that your pants are still hanging from the edge of the
elevator door twelve floors above you--at least until you try to put
the lollipop in your pocket and discover it isn't there.
===========
From: TURTLE
To: CHIP P. UNICORN
Subject: Present!
Date & Time: 12/11/89 03:26:35
Message Number 876
Well, I've just returned from visiting Cindy in Ft. Myers (and watching
"Black Rain"--a worthwhile flick), so that explains why I wasn't around.
I'm afraid I can't accept anything which may lead to another religious
experience, though--I've had three so far this week, and my doctor's
getting annoyed with me...
--A holy Turtle
===========
From: TURTLE
To: CORWYN OF AMBER
Subject: in Ham Center..
Date & Time: 12/11/89 03:30:01
Message Number 877
What would I know about a DEC mainframe in Ham Center? I've been in Ft.
Myers this weekend!! Actually, I suspect Raven, Chip, and Rufus may be
the people to ask about this one...I just hope it doesn't end up
migrating over here like the last one did. (I still want to find an
operating system for the PDP in the utility room, it'd be so nice to
have a PC with some /real/ processing power...)
===========
From: SPELLWIND
To: ARTHURIAN TYPES
Subject: Mists of Avalon
Date & Time: 12/11/89 04:43:16
Message Number 878
Not all King Arthur revisions are alike! Of all the different tellings
of one of my favorite stories, The Mists of Avalon is by far the BEST!
The Mists of Avalon--- By Marion Zimmer Bradley,
The best of the best...
A truly Arthured out Archdemon,
Spellwind
===========
From: CYBERPUNK
To: RUFUS
Subject: bbs
Date & Time: 12/11/89 07:15:50
Message Number 879
beleive me, if i wasn't broke, i would have a phone line!!
Cy
===========
From: CYBERPUNK
To: SPELLWIND
Subject: sigh...
Date & Time: 12/11/89 07:16:36
Message Number 880
your 18?!?!?!?!! damn, you look younger than me!!! oh well
*BURP*
Cy
===========
From: SIR AVALON
To: CYBERPUNK
Subject: sigh...
Date & Time: 12/11/89 07:33:05
Message Number 881
Thanks alot! I am glad I retain my youth, It'll pay off in the future
when you all look like old farts and I'm still youthfull...
Anyway, This is (was) Spellwind, with a new outlook/additude. Info on my
phonomenal change can be found in Wyvern's Den, and alot more in Courts
of Chaos. I'm not so high and mighty anymore.

Sir Avalon the Wisdom Seeker
Teach me new things, for I will be a willing
student.
===========
From: CYBERPUNK
To: SPELLWIND
Subject: Jarvis Rd.
Date & Time: 12/11/89 16:47:11
Message Number 882
ya, why?
Cy
===========
From: CORWYN OF AMBER
To: BARTHOLOMEW FOX
Subject: Wizard
Date & Time: 12/11/89 17:11:54
Message Number 883
It's an animated movie.. "They shot Fritz!" is probably the most famous
line.. watch for it.. (Go out and rent the movie now, any self respecin
movie rental store should have it)
- Corwyn
===========
From: CORWYN OF AMBER
To: TURTLE
Subject: Life
Date & Time: 12/11/89 17:14:09
Message Number 884
One: sunfishes suck. Two: Hobie's are best when the wind is about
twenty to thirty knots. Three: I expect that you were missing the girls
and the beer... now /that's/ boring!
- Corwyn
===========
From: CORWYN OF AMBER
To: TURTLE
Subject: sigh...
Date & Time: 12/11/89 17:16:33
Message Number 885
I was curious about that.. thank's for clarify-ing it. But what about
when you notice that your lollipop is grape not cherry? Are you still
in love?
- Corwyn
===========
From: SIR AVALON
To: CYBERPUNK
Subject: Jarvis Rd.
Date & Time: 12/11/89 18:10:17
Message Number 886
I almost moved to the house back there with all the plants and trees
in the backyard... Nice houses.
===========
From: RUFUS
To: CORYWN OF AMBER
Subject: Mainframe
Date & Time: 12/11/89 18:54:22
Message Number 887
O.K. This is for Turtle too. Raven and Chip purchased the mainframe.
We stuck it in the back of my van to bring to your house, you wern't
home so we took it to Ham center where they had me drive on the
sidewalk about 1/2 mile, then backup for some reason. They bought
it because it has an Operating system with it. Other than that, all I
know is it is named Athena Axelbreaker.
Athena for the original name for HAL from 2001.
Axelbreaker because it is heavy.
Come on down to Rufus' we move it. Mainframes to moose, we move it all.
===========
From: CHIP P. UNICORN
To: PSYCHE
Subject: WHY?
Date & Time: 12/11/89 19:52:00
Message Number 889
Kind of. I'm quickly finding my love of mainframes over my love
of homework... (BTW, it's finally over at Turtle's place. Crystal
will probably KILL Turtle when she gets home...)
Chip P. Unicorn
===========
From: TURTLE
To: SPELLWIND
Subject: Mists of Avalon
Date & Time: 12/12/89 02:45:00
Message Number 890
Not even close. If you're looking for the most imaginitive, most
unusual, and generally all-around most amazing retelling of the
King Author legend, check out "Mage"--a series of graphic novels by
(I believe) Mark Wagner (or sumpin' like that.) It is truly an
impressive work.
===========
From: TURTLE
To: SIR AVALON
Subject: sigh...
Date & Time: 12/12/89 02:47:49
Message Number 891
You're weird.
===========
From: TURTLE
To: CORWYN OF AMBER
Subject: Life
Date & Time: 12/12/89 02:48:30
Message Number 892
>Three: I expect that you were missing the girls and the beer...
Certainly not the beer. Beer is one of the most disgusting substances
you can possibly put in your mouth. It has all the appeal of rotting
grain, with none of the delicate flavor. Beer is an amazingly noxious
liquid that really should recevie a hazardous waste code...if it doesn't
have one already.
--A beer-loathing Turtle
===========
From: TURTLE
To: CORWYN OF AMBER
Subject: love! & stuff
Date & Time: 12/12/89 02:51:01
Message Number 893
>But what about when you notice that your lollipop is grape not cherry?
>Are you still in love?
No.
===========
From: TURTLE
To: RUFUS
Subject: Mainframe II
Date & Time: 12/12/89 02:52:18
Message Number 894
Well, gang, an update on the mysterious DEC mainframe in Hamilton
Center: It ain't there anymore. That's 'cause it's in my utility room,
sitting right next to another, similar machine who will be its friend.
The new puppy works okey-dokey, boots up and everything, 'cept Yours
Truly doesn't have anything like...oh, documentation or manuals or
anything for it, so the reptile's playing blind. He's used RT-11
exactly once in his life, you see, and, well, TECO ain't exactly
intuitive, if you catch my drift. Still, it's a fun toy to play
with...think I'll use it to store recipies. All of them. And maybe
write letters.
--A mainframe Turtle
===========
From: CORWYN OF AMBER
To: TURTLE
Subject: Life
Date & Time: 12/12/89 04:01:24
Message Number 895
Fine: Rum and Coke, OK (another sailor's standby)
if you're /really/ into sailing... you skip the coke.
- Corywn (Competitor in the: Who get drink the most and still
manage to sail regatta) Aka Regatta time in Abaco
===========
From: CORWYN OF AMBER
To: TURTLE
Subject: love! & stuff
Date & Time: 12/12/89 04:03:52
Message Number 896
How many lick's /does/ it take to get to the tootsie roll center of a
tootsie roll pop?
===========
From: CHIP P. UNICORN
To: TURTLE
Subject: PDP
Date & Time: 12/12/89 10:06:53
Message Number 897
So... when are you going to put up the function "<D>oorway to the PDP"?
Chip P. Unicorn
===========
From: CHIP P. UNICORN
To: CORWYN OF AMBER
Subject: Life
Date & Time: 12/12/89 10:07:32
Message Number 898
You missed chocolate. And puppies. And flowers.
Have an excruciatingly pleasant day,
Chip P. Unicorn
===========
From: CHIP P. UNICORN
To: CORWYN OF AMBER
Subject: Me? Paranoid?
Date & Time: 12/12/89 10:09:51
Message Number 899
The Computer is your friend. The Computer wants you to be happy.
The Computer thinks that you are not happy enough. The Computer wants
you to take these happy pills. Failure to take these pills is treason.
You will be happy.
Chip P. Unicorn
===========
From: CHIP P. UNICORN
To: ROCKY
Subject: My Brother?
Date & Time: 12/12/89 10:14:17
Message Number 900
Yes, yes, thank you; thank you; I DID play a part of Amber, didn't I?
Temples to me strewn throughout Shadow... hundreds of admirers...
Oh, hell; I'm not The Unicorn, just a unicorn. But you can worship
me if you feel like it.
Chip P. Unicorn
===========