393 lines
18 KiB
Plaintext
393 lines
18 KiB
Plaintext
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### ###
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### #### ### ### ### ####
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### ### ##### ### ###
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########## ### ### ##########
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Underground eXperts United
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Presents...
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####### ## ## ####### # # ####### ####### #######
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## ## ## ## ##### ## ## ## ## ##
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#### ## ## #### # # ####### ## ## ## ##
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## ## ## ## ##### ## ## ## ## ##
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## ## ####### ####### # # ####### ####### #######
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[ Just A Number ] [ By The uXu Concept ]
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____________________________________________________________________
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____________________________________________________________________
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'Just a Number' 500 FILES!
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by the uXu YES YES YES YES YES!
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5 0 0 WE (ALSO) MADE IT!
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IT (ONLY) TOOK US EIGHT YEARS!
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HO HO HO HO HO HO HO HO HO
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"The secret of popular writing is never to put more
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on a given page than the common reader can lap off
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it with no strain whatsoever on his habitually slack
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attention."
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(Ezra Pound)
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we don't think so
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and we never will
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If you're looking for cheap entertainment, move on. This file is not for
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you. It's for... someone else. Move on to alta vista. Search for sex.
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Drop your pants in front of the monitor and express your only talent.
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Now, for the rest of you who are still here...
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This is a typical anarchistic textfile within the realm of electronic
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underground writing. It has no real beginning or end. It is about nothing
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special. No author? No specific one.
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No layout.
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No design, no credits, no spell checking, no grammar checking, no prestige,
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hard to read, hard to understand. A bundle of opinions and beliefs
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expressed in no systematic combination whatsoever.
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These kind of files were very common, once upon a time.
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We wrote it partially to celebrate the 500th file of the uXu.
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But mainly as an homage to the last ASCII generation.
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You see...
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We are of what we believe to be the last recognizable generation of a
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full-time, life-time writers dedicated to the american standard code
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of information interchange.
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We love being writers, but we cannot stand the paperwork. Therefore,
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computers are exactly what - and the only thing - we need. When it comes
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to the analogue world, we are like everyone else. We breathe, eat and
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work. We have friends and family. But in the digital world, we are
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esoteric and anonymous; few of us use our real names. We will never appear
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in the culture section of your favorite morning paper, talking about
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"post-modern projects". We will never show up in debates on television,
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debating classic and modern prose in relation to "democratic alienation". We
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will all die anonymous, and few will ever know who wrote the uXu files. We
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do not tell you this to think that we are special, because we are not.
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This is written in 1999, but it all started a long time ago, in an era of
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romantic anarchy in digital publishing, a time when everything went, nothing
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was too extreme, most people just wanted their Voice to be heard, not their
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Face to be shown.
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But we were of course not the first. We were far from the first, even. Ever
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since the seventies people all around the world had discovered the freedom
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inherent in the various machines for aretmetical and logical operations,
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occasionally connected to each other thanks to ingenious protocols. And we
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will not be the last. We are not the best. But certainly not the worst
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either.
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Like all e-zines in the ascii-industry we are grateful to the Cult.
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Without them, who knows how the electronic world would have looked today?
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What counted was not the Form, but the Content. Not because people simply
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did not care about Form, but because they had no choice. The american
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standard code of information interchange defines itself as text-only. Bright
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green (or orange) text on a black screen, that's all you got, do the best
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of it, if you can. If you're not interested in doing your best, do whatever
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you can, no one will complain. They will just read.
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Yeah, sure, some tried to make themselves bigger than they actually were
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by lame attempts to charm the audience with sentences like hEy MaN IZ
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n0t Th1Z C000L, but it never worked out. There are no short cuts to the
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art of .txt - because it is only text, and text-only.
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We wrote all the shit we wanted to write. We could do it, because we
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were anonymous. We were not Persons, but Handles. Anonymous individuals
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who could present whatever sick opinion we had - just for the sake of
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it! Just for the sake of feeling "hey! I can write this! AND NO ONE WILL
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STOP ME!" Try the same today... it's impossible. You are always Known,
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Controlled, Examined, Valued, Rejected, And So On... FREEDOM! FREEDOM!
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Modern technology made it possible for us to say whatever we wanted to
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say, no matter if we meant it or not. Fantasies are nice, thoughts are
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interesting, but they are to a certain extent strictly private. But modern
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technology made it possible for us to share our private views, without
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being shot down by a lynch mob of critics the next day. FREEDOM! FREEDOM!
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Modern technology makes it possible for any mediocre philosopher to put
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out some trite cliche' in big big capital letters, and get away with it,
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because before the viewers mind says "what the hell is this shit?" the
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screen explodes in cascades of pointless graphics. It is called "design",
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but it is nothing more than color to cover up and hide the empty space
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behind. Take your little hammer and carefully bang it against some of the
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great statues of the Internet that has been erected during the past years.
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What do you hear? It echoes - it is empty. It is nice to watch, it is big
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and majestic - but it is empty.
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This is our five-hundreth file. We ought to talk about ourselves in this
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text, but what should we say? A lot, of course. But no one knows where
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to begin. So why not let someone else talk about the uXu instead:
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Electronic Magazines: UXU (Underground eXperts United)
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Founded in 1991, based in Sweden, uXu is a good example of a textfile
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endeavor where you can actually track the progression of a small social
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group through nearly a decade. The files begin with descriptions of the
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computer "scene" of Sweden, bombs, technology and eventually expands
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over the years to journal entries, musings about philosphy, song lyrics,
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interviews, and a bunch of nice fellows just letting you know what
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they're up to. All in all, good solid quality and a fascinating study.
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(Thank you, Jason at <www.textfiles.com>.)
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Speaking of thanks............
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There are do many people we would like to thank that we dare not even
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try. If we did, we would most probably forget someone important. So,
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instead of making someone sad, let us just say that we thank <PUT YOUR
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NAME HERE>. You deserve it, you really do. We love you, we really do.
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If we tried to thank all the people around the world who have contributed
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to the existance of the uXu, we would certainly fail and forget someone.
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Those of you who really deserves to be thanked know who you are.
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Some deserves to be fucked in the ass. Those we can mention, they are
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not many; in fact, only one. The uXu do not thank: the anonymous (what?
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didn't you dare to state your name?) investigator at the swedish police
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force who in 1993 called the uXu "a group dedicated to spreading textfiles
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on the subject of terrorism". YOU KNOW NOTHING YOU ARE NOTHING YOU WILL
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NEVER BECOME ANYTHING BUT THE UXU WILL LIVE FOREVER
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But hey, let bygones be bygones.
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Laugh and forget, love and remember.
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and... oh... let us not forget our dear WRITERS!
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*** WRITER'S GALLERY ***
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First one: Joseph
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Date: 1/1/96
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Time: 5.30 A.M.
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Place: Highway leading out of Uppsala
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After a rather wet new-years eve, when the last bottle was finished, I
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decided to walk home. Due to my intoxicated status I took the wrong way and
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found myself walking down the highway to Stockholm. It had started to snow
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and the freezing wind bit my cheeks. Vision was down to five feet and my
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can of beer almost empty. I finally realised that I was lost - in my home
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town. What to do? I argued with my drunken mind. Perhaps it was better to
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turn around and take new directions from the last place I recognised? Nope,
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wine and beer-fumes told me, if I walked on I would eventually, one way or
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the other, come home. Most likely with the help from the local police, but
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who cared. So, there I was, walking down the middle of the highway. Cars
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honked their horns as they almost hit me in the blazing snow. By that time I
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was really depressed and had almost lost all hope to find my way home. Then
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I suddenly heard music! I turned my head and in a window not far away I saw
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the blurred contours of a man leaning out, singing.
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He spotted me and our eyes met.
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"Can you drink?" he asked.
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My throat was aching for alcohol so my reply was instant.
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"Yes!" I shouted.
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And so it began. My saviour turned out to be The GNN and he introduced
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me that morning to the uXu. Looking back, I can clearly say that encounter
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opened up a new world for me.
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Second one: Hedge.
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When I was around the age of 20, I came into contact with a guy who were
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really into anarchistic stuff. He had books about lockpicking, how to make
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bombs and any other non-normal book you can imagine. This guy also wrote a
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lot of weird litterature on his old dusty Amiga and, as he told me,
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everything got published.
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Everything published? I asked myself. Who could be stupid enough to
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publish anything written by this anarco-militarist? He talked about this
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group which had a huge amount of readers, and how the texts were
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distributed via the Internet. Internet was just becoming known to the
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general public at this time, so I had little knowledge about what that
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meant. Nor had I ever heard of the group he wrote for: the uXu.
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During this period I was concentrating on my studies at the university,
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and had built up a lot of frustration when it came to socio-political
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issues, and the intellectual climate in Sweden at the time. uXu gave me the
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chance to write about any thoughts I had, and they published them all,
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uncensored. Now, they may not have been read by that many, but the sheer
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possibility of someone reading them made my frustration a lot easier to
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handle.
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Some years have passed since I first started writing for uXu, and I don't
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write as much nowadays. This is partly because I have a job which takes up
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most of my time, and partly because I don't have same the inspiration I had
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when starting out. Still, once in a while, I hack away at the texteditor.
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It could be about anything, perhaps just some passing thought I feel I need
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to put down in writing.
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The comfort of knowing it will be seen is still as good.
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Too much information
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Runnin through my brain
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Too much information
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Driving me insane
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(Police)
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Third: Max West
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I HAD NEVER HEARD OF THE uXu....
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...until some months ago when the file came across my desk. It is now 3
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o'clock A.M., no way I am going to sleep any time soon; my option list is
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light and they're moving in. Down in front on the sidewalk, furtive
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movement in the bushes and I haven't seen any sign of The Fatboy, (my
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field operative), yet. I wonder if they got him too......
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REPORT TO ICI:
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Of the extensive amount of underground Cybersites investigated thus
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far, one of the most suspicious was uXu; reportedly basing it's Earthside
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strike force in Sweden, we found that no such organization, underground'
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or otherwise, actually existed in this location. Though the documentation,
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i.e, photos, e-mail etc., (did you see how they were holding up those
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drinks? When we examined the photo enlargement, I saw empty vodka bottles
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and prophylactics under one table), indicate that they obviously have the
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resource and technology for convincing cover, I happen to know that their
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true form is a sort of proto human-like shape which appears to be
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constructed of small curd cottage cheese. The material flowing into the
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site from various Cyber venues is at best, insalubrious, subversive and
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obscene.....
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"What's fuckin' "underground !" From Tony in front of the monitor
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where she's cracking the site we need full profiles on all principals; I
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would like to know what color underwear they prefer, providing they use
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such articles, and if so, how often do they change etc.
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"You are Tony. Your underground...." I had to tell her. Reports from
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other districts were filled with wild rumor and innuendo about uXu, but I
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can't believe they'd be involved in a royal assassination plot. I mean, if
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you're a Cyber-entity, why bother? What are they really up to?
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So far we haven't been able to determine their true M.O., or location
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but something tells me it isn't going to matter in a few more minutes
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anyway. Yeah, I can hear them outside they don't pretend to not be there,
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they know by now that we can't escape. Goddamn uXu agents! They're all over
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the place, their post-modern cut-out shadows already windmilling through
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the room; scratching at the door....must...get...free....
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Fourth: The GNN
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Hey. How's it going?
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Wanna know something? During the eight years I have been active, I have
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written more than 250 textfiles for the uXu, 1500 pages crammed with pure
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text. I tell you this to boast. I seldom get the chance. Anyway, in most
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of these files, I have described lots of people and put them in various
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situations. These people, the characters, do not exist, of course. But
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I cannot help to think that I really would like to meet them, to see
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how they are. "What?" you say, "What an absurd thought!" Yes, I know.
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But I cannot help it. Maybe I will see them all when I die. Perhaps
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there is such a place as a limbo of t-file characters, to where I will
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go too and stand trial for everything I have done to them.
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See you around.
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uXu forever
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Fifth: Speed Devil Show
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What's wrong?
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What's wrong?
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I need something stronger.
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I am someone else, in a new costume.
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Fuck you, A.P./C.S., hope you die soon, and in pain. If you disrespect
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my art one more time, I will end your life with my bare hands, asshole.
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Sixth: Jericho / F.U.C.K.
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uXu and me.
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For those of you who don't recognize my name, I'm the editor of an e-zine
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founded in 1993 called 'FUCK' (Fucked Up College Kids). In six years, we
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have released 550 files, almost 25% of which were my own. So why do I
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write for uXu? Two main reasons. First, uXu has continually produced a
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steady stream of high quality files. By accepting my files, it lets me
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know that others out there see some value in my writing or my message.
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Second, uXu offers a chance to reach a completely different crowd and
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solicit more diverse feedback. While it probably isn't recognized in our
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lifetimes, e-zines like uXu will later be historical and noteworthy events
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that helped shape the way we communicate online.
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Last: Bravemoore
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I started out as part of the behind-the-scenes uXu crew. I managed the
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stage sets (lights & pyrotechnics mainly), but I also served a couple of
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years as one of the road crew, i.e., driving one of the trucks.
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During the uXu European Tour 1995, The GNN was supposed to read a poem
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on stage as the final part of the two-hour show. The Chief and Phearless
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was resting backstage, exhausted from their much appreciated, but now
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discontinued show "Two men, one bike and a chainsaw" (due to a most
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unfortunate accident).
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The GNN had only recited two lines of the poem, when the timer controlled
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fireworks suddenly blasted off behind him and literally burned off
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everything on his back, including his skin. It took the surgeons six months
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to put him back together, but almost one year before we two talked again.
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Not because he couldn't, but because I was the one who set the timers
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incorrectly.
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But now, we're one big family once again, and during the annual uXu
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conference in 1996, I was granted the status of "Official uXu Member."
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One of the happiest moments in my life.
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*** END OF WRITER'S GALLERY ***
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(yeah, the other 65 writers dared not contribute...)
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And now, the moment we have all been waiting for....
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THE BRIEF HISTORY OF THE UXU SO FAR
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-----------------------------------
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Apart from the notorious logo, it all began in august 1991 with:
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"Perhaps an introduction is due, and some sort of explanation why
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this author starts a new group instead of writing for the group
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he once founded and lead. This is the story."
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Six months later, The Chief wrote in the fourth index:
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"I thought that release #3 would be the last one."
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But eight years (thousand years in computer years) and around seven
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megabytes (3000 pages of real text) of English and Swedish .txt later, it
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will, as always, for the moment, end with:
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"If anything is unclear or if you want to get more material from
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the uXu, please write directly to the editor: editor@uxu.org"
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More to come. The united experts of the underground will live forever.
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THE END
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-------
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Every day is a fresh beginning,
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Listen my soul to the glad refrain.
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And, spite of old sorrows
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And older sinning,
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Troubles forecasted
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And possible pain
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Take heart with the day and begin again.
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("New Every Morning", Susan Coolidge)
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Right. After all this, the uXu will go back to the normal, structured
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and organised way again.
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Greetings from Sweden, autumn of 1999.
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See you all somewhere in The Netherlands 2001.
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all questions go to: editor@uxu.org
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all else: www.uxu.org
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---------------------------------------------------------------------------
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uXu #500 Underground eXperts United 1999 uXu #500
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Send your submissions to submission@uxu.org
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---------------------------------------------------------------------------
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