1039 lines
44 KiB
Plaintext
1039 lines
44 KiB
Plaintext
p T A M e R S H R e W ... vol. 4
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¿¿¿¿¿¿¿¿¿¿
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¿¿¿¿ ¿¿¿¿¿¿¿ ¿¿¿ ¿¿¿¿ ¿¿¿¿¿¿ ¿¿¿¿¿¿¿
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¿¿¿ ¿¿¿ ¿¿¿ ¿¿¿ ¿¿ ¿¿¿¿¿¿¿¿¿
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¿¿¿ ¿¿¿ ¿¿¿ ¿¿¿ ¿¿¿¿¿¿ ¿¿¿ ¿¿¿
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¿¿¿¿¿¿¿ ¿¿¿ ¿¿¿
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¿¿¿¿¿¿¿ ¿¿¿
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¿¿¿ ..edited, compiled, prelimanarily perused,
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¿¿¿ felt up, jostled and spell checked by,
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Stretch
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===================>-WorDs--To---------<====================
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===================>----------Be-HaD---<====================
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1> "Felino" ... Xann
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2> "Untitled" ... Cosmic Coyote
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3> "Fingers" ... Stretch
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4> "Soulglasses" ... W. Dennis
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5> "Untitled" ... Shadou
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6> "Tales of the Net: Part 4" ... Watchman 'Tong
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7> "The (Extremely Erroneous) Odor-ssey" ... Black Sabbath
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8> "Poetic Penetration" ... William Burroughs
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9> "HOMER.TXT" ... Homer the Brave
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10> "Illusion" ... William Burroughs
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11> "In Early Morning" ... Cosmic Coyote
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12> "Vampire" ... Xann
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13> A portion of the novel, _MOUNT_ ... Brandon Aubrey
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===================>-------------------<====================
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===================>-------------------<====================
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Felino
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wendells car, karens car, warming up in coldness dark 430 on the am
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dial in homeless hopeless houston.
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the invasion from the cyborg star it seemed had finally been
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repelled we waved goodbye the coke machines and the pilots were out
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of petrol.
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so i strolled under the freeway where the homeless men are found
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but i couldnt find a single one in the overgrown parking lot.
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wendells car, karens car, warming up in coldness dark four lights
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delta in the fog of homeless hopeless houston.
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**********
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i, of course, could not drive them home thru the weeds and asphalt.
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not without a suitable exit. there is, however, an office,
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abandoned. the foyer is overgrown with vine and steam and tree. a
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rainforest cold and misty. large white cat, angry, staring into an
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lcd laptop screen. light, green, ambient. turns, glares:
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"waste yr talent, twoleg!"
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"o? and what talent is that?"
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"fully articulated, digitory manipulation!"
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"?"
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"my god, mann! do you know what its like to live in such silence?
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do you know the years? no voice that a mann save you
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understands! no usable hand no twoleg to stand you bastard! if
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for one day i had yr body and hands...two good hands with which
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to write, id change this world...waste yr talent, twoleg!"
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pick him up, reassure him.
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"you can write thru me, then. come on..."
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***********
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lift cat, gift cat, felino yr my only friend
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write thru me
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and let me see
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what eternal silence teaches.
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further into darkness office, pale, seagreen sunlight
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shattered thickened
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stainglass dirt
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and roach and rat and weed.
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!radiant reddress queen awaits; white felina by her side
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felines peer
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and wave goodbye
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and suddenly were alone.
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sensual pose and in my nose patchouly strikes me dead
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breathe it down
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and see the crown
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appear with each warm breath:
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"you know, jewel, no longer am i afraid to touch you.."
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"o?...what are you going to do about it?"
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************
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[long pause]
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white cat! male brat! never satisfied!
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unwitting, emulates the womb in everything he tried!
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'passion-beast, how ever!'
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'passion-beast, how could you!'
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'passion-beast o tell us please of the holy womb which made
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you!'
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'beast flown down from starry ocean to get back into the whale!
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please o please tell us yr tale!'
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"oedipal. sensual. a pilgrims dream come true."
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[no details for you]
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[*] (Xann)
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Untitled: September 3, 1993
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If I had never accepted your affections
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My happiness would never have returned.
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Had I known the pain of such acceptance
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would I have trod so willingly this current path?
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My heart brought my mind to states of delight
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thought dead since a wedding became a funeral day.
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Now,
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that tapestry hangs ripped in tattered shreds.
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Defying me my arrogance to have dared to love again.
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The foundations of the universe stand planted on my heart.
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Mocking my feeble attempts to leave the oppressions of loss.
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Denying my last dignity.
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Departure
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Passage needed to end our mutual pain.
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In a great depression there are no words
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to tell those who must know
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when you learn your time has come to leave.
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Goodbye.
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I never wanted you to feel this pain.
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My love will live beyond this passage.
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Forever.
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[*] Cosmic Coyote
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Fingers
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This man talked a bit about
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a change that was coming over
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his fingers.
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New lines...
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New hair...
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And a slight tremor he tried
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not to think about too much.
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I remember most of our conversation, something about good health
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and a strong cock always ready..something about 'something is
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happening.' He had a pleasant voice. And at some level his
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words affected me greatly. Changed the way I feel about certain
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things and situations. Fingers and even toes. Changed the way
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I 'process information.'
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Words...
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It was he that first mentioned 'skin;' he that first mentioned
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'cock;' he that first mentioned 'something;' he that first
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noticed whatever it was that was happening to his finger.
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His words...
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This same man talked about
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drinking coffee and how,
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when pouring,
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his girlfriend and he would
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comment on the rainbow sheen of
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fat-swirls that would bend and
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wrap in upon themselves on the surface...
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the very same thing
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that 'would one day stop our hearts.'
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I've seen this...
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And now I'm taken with a woman not three feet from where my
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fingers frantically crawl over these keys ... oh, horror. And
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yet I'm even more taken with a dead man's words ... simple, black
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on white, so much like me. The woman will be gone in a moment,
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both from my thoughts and my sight, but this dead man's
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words--something about a change that was coming over his
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fingers--will be with me longer than I, or she can imagine.
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[*] (stretch)
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Soulglasses
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why should i mind what you find
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when you look inside of me
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i think its kind that yr not blind to who i want to be
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why must we always see oceans
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how come we never see the sharks?
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as we define all our emotions
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and live our lives out in the dark-
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recess of our brains
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stand before the masses
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place on yr soul glasses
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end the fascination
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puke up fabrication
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find out who you are
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well i wonder, yes i wonder
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who you really are
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thoughts are bullets in the flesh gun of mann
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the dead unloaded we fear them
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and give them value in a worthless state
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cause someday were gonna be near them
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flesh hides monsters inside of us all
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although we try not to see them
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animals call out and animals crawl out
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when you have sex you will free them
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animal passion escapes my lips
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animal passion im onna trip
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animal passion its drivin my hips
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animal passion i wanna slip
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inside animal you
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animal me
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i see animal me
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inside animal, animal you
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one two
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animal me
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animal you
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i see animal me
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inside of animal, cannibal you!
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[*] (W. Dennis)
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--N-O-T-E---------------------------------------------------
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For those of you who don't know ... W. Dennis just so
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happens to be Xann's uncle ... 'Soulglasses' was sent down
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here, from Michigan, via Xann ... Xann claims it's the best
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poem ever written. If you didn't get anything out of it,
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try reading it again...
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--------------------------------------------ED.-------------
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Untitled
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Now for stream of unthought, whatever comes into my un-mind, my
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little hidden organic computer running programs to build an
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emotional response through chemical reations......hmmm, nothing but
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an animal, a piece of flesh, blood, bleeding hatred, congealed
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anger forming scabs of power to protect from the jeers and leers of
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fools, and rules to be broken, and breaks to take, breaking away
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from the reality i thought a lie, lying in fields of molten
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daisies, fiery flowers firing their screams in my direction, my
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association notwithstanding, not with standing.......sitting in
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rooms, geraniums filled pots of dirt spilled on the carpet, stains
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of the larvae breeding, juices of often romanticized insect love
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drying on the floor i thought was mine alone. lonely, no, only the
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lonely have not anyone, anyone could be everything, a thing to do,
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something to occupy my free time, time is an essence, another time,
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another crime, another analogy, metaphorically speaking enough
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uncounted thoughts, uncollected, organized chronologically for my
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benefit, bereft of all but one.................................
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[*] (shadou)
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Tales of the Net, Part 4: The Armageddon Packet
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Bar arrived and padded next to Qux, Baz and Foo. Damn, been
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dragging dead horses all day; What a pain, she said.
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What was it this time, a new _Rabid Raiders of the Crypt_ game?
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asked Baz. He smiled. Or a new font set? quipped Foo.
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No, same old thing. `My dog is better than your dog.' Same song,
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different verse, she sighed.
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Let me guess, said Foo. Ford vs. Chevys? IBM vs. Macs? Democrats
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vs. Republicans? Or the old standby - baby vs. tissue?
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Baz chuckled humorlessly. Hey, you forgot blacks vs. whites,
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PCBoard vs. Celerity, Straights vs. Gays and Telemate vs. Qmodem.
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And don't forget: `A woman's place is...'. said Qux, feigning
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conviction. They all grimaced at her for that one.
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Nope. Immigration vs. Protectionism this time. It was like
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firebombs in a fireworks stand once the guy posted it. Everyone
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just HAD to set the record straight on that one. No `IMHO' (in my
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humble opinion), no `I think...', just BLAM - Believe it or die!
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Dig the trenches, load the buffer, and kill the infidels! You'll be
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transing them too before it's all over, I would imagine, said Bar.
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They nodded knowingly.
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I know! said Baz brightly. Someday, someone is going to get it all
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just perfect - sort of a combination of everything all rolled into
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one post. An Armageddon Packet! God vs. the whole Net! Yeah, it'll
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melt down the Net and kill us all. They all laughed for a long
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time.
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[*] (Watchman T'ong)
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The (Extremely Erroneous) Odor-ssey
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Use-less-eez trudged onward, his feet riddled with bruises and the
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occasional toejam. He had travelled far, and had yet to walk upon his
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homeland, Iacoca. Giving up was not an option for him, however, and his
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weary feet took him a little farther toward his destination, which was
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unknown because he was totally and thoroughly lost. His stomach grumbled,
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and his beard had grown unruly, but that didn't bother him now.
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Soon enough, a small blur appeared on the horizon. He squinted.
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Nothing. He squinted harder. Nothing. He tried his very hardest to see
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what it was, and almost lost an eye squinting that hard, but to no avail.
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And finally, it hit him.
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"I've been staring at the sun too much," he muttered.
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With that, he gasped, as something tapped him on the shoulder.
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Use-less-eez looked behind him, but saw nothing again.
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He realized what happened, and whirled around in the other direction.
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He said, "That's a really old joke, you kno..."
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He suddenly recognized who he was talking to, and his jaw dropped
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several inches (double take has been edited out). The figure before him
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was none other than the grey-contact-lensed Pallas Acetominephen! It was
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she who had protected him during the fierce battles of the Trojan (no joke
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needed here) War, it was she who had given him twenty-four hour relief
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when he had migraines, and it would be she, if any, who would bring him
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out of this terrible dilemma.
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Acetominephen eyed him warily, and said, "Is it you, Oedipus?"
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"It's USE-LESS-EEZ! Get it RIGHT!"
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"Oh. Whatever. Listen Omnibus..."
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"...Use-less-EEZ!"
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Acetominephen, not to be stopped in mid-sentence, continued stubbornly,
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"...Emphysema..."
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"It's... oh, forget it."
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"...Oedipus, I've lost track of you ever since the finale of the Trojan
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War. Whatever happened to you afterwards?" she asked.
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His expression grew two times more weary, mostly because he had already
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told his story to at least three hundred people, and he began to relate to
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his immortal friend his tale of mortal toil.
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"Well, I was inside the Trojan horse, where you undoubtedly saw me last,
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and then one of my men let one. We all ran out, holding our noses, fleeing
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for cleaner air. The Trojans *snicker* ran in to intercept us, but some
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idiot left the Trojan horse in neutral, and it rolled over them like
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a rolling pin over dough (great simile, huh?). The Trojans who didn't
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come out were laughing so hard they were unable to fight, and we sacked
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the great town of Priam. I personally led my men up to the capital, where
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our objective was located. We entered the great hall of the king, and
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he challenged me to an arm-wrestling match. I shrugged, asked him if I
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could use the restroom first, to which he agreed, and walked into the inner
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chamber. There lay the object of our entire war. A pair of genuine Dr.
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Scholl's Odor-ssey Eaters, the fruit of our labor, was right before me,
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and I quickly seized them and ran out the door. Of course, the king
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pursued me, but he had put in a few dozen too many grape jelly donuts, and
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collapsed in a heap as his stomach cramped. Shakespeare, Othellomenon,
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Hidey-Ho, and Sneezy were told immediately that our goal had been reached,
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and we withdrew from the great city of Priam. From there we sailed for
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forty days and forty nights, until we discovered our navigator Gilligan
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was actually a blind Ethiopian named Manchu. We were totally lost. For
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another week, we sailed the sea, and on the last night, our only hope had
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disappeared when the shuffleboard equipment washed overboard. It must have
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been you, my friend, who saved us..."
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Pallas Acetominephen looked up from picking her immortal nose, and,
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startled, said, "Huh? Er... yeah! That was... me..."
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Not to be interrupted, Use-less-eez doggedly continued, "I thought as
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much. We sighted an island, and landed. Although we didn't know it at the
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time, it was the island of Caeser Palace, and we sent scouts to search the
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island. They came back two days later to our relief, and informed us that
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they had a very nice casino in the middle of the island at which they had
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gambled away several herds of cattle, their ship, and, apparently, their
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clothes. I walked to the casino in hopes of having their large
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fee paid in small monthly installments, but the proprietor, Poseidon, and
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his burly goon, Guido, would not let me. Instead, Poseidon Casino-Lord
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took his pay in the form of my crew's lives and our ship, and threw me to
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the beerdark sea. I drifted for a long time, not knowing what day it
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was because the water had shorted out my Rolex, and I finally landed on the
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island we're on now. And, Pallas Acetomineohen, I am now at your mercy.
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Without your help, I am as good as gone."
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Pallas Acetominephen snored lightly, and then quickly woke up.
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"Er... really? What? Can't you just call a taxi, Ustedes?"
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Use-less-eez flushed angrily, and then replied, "Nah. No change.
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Besides, it costs over four hundred head of cattle for tip alone."
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"Well, I'll tell you what. I will take you home myself. But when
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you arrive home, you must satsify the gods by microwaving your finest frozen
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dinners as tribute. Click your heels together and say, "No Decent Human
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Listens To Country Music". And when you arrive home, do as I told you, and
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never forget what I have done for you."
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Use-less-eez smiled happily, and said, "A thousand thanks, oh grey-
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contact-lensed one! Bless you!"
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He then clicked his heels together and sputtered, "No decent humans
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listens to country music!". A small flash of light, and Use-less-eez was
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instantly transported back to his beloved homeland, Iacoca.
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EPILOGUE
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There really is no need for an epilogue, because, incidentally,
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Use-less-eez was instantly transported into the middle of I-45
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during rush hour, and was promptly run over by an eight-wheeler
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carrying foreign beer like a rolling pin over... oh, never mind.
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[*] (Black Sabbath)
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Poetic Penetration
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I
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Lies working their way to news
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Zen life The cigarette-like ashes of society
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Ashes on the street & on the schools
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Will our intelligence walk past us
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Wearing Nikes & fear
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Walking past houses of paper & glass
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& I scream You scream
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We have to get out of this place
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We have to run
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Run far away
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& once we get to our destination,
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We must run more to get away
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From our friends & from our lives
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& everything is everything
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The world waits to explode
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Watch out for the trains
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The mother now cries,
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Cries for the child that never was
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& waits for more
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& waits for more
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Keeps waiting
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Keeps waiting
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What a disturbing feeling
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I don't know anymore...
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II
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Penmarks Scratches Jottings
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Formed into meaningless illedgable illogical
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Words
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Passages in time & spirit
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Which runs away
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Goes away
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Let me live again & eat my chili
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Corn dog
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Call the gardener'd call for the asking
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& the giving & the alms
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Take the bread away
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Throw away the food
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The life
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III
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Surf in the morning
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W/ the tide coming in
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& the morning dew
|
||
& the guns & the blood
|
||
Why don't you go away
|
||
& why do you stay w/ me
|
||
I'm not a very nice person
|
||
& you still talk to me
|
||
Save your city
|
||
Right then
|
||
Go away
|
||
Amen
|
||
|
||
[*] (Williams Burroughs)
|
||
|
||
|
||
|
||
|
||
|
||
HOMER.TXT
|
||
|
||
She wasn't sure why she had come to the forest.
|
||
|
||
She was an urban type, unaccustomed to enjoying flora and fauna,
|
||
and certainly not accustomed to fresh air. But she had come.
|
||
|
||
It was a small state park, a pocket-sized oasis of green and fresh
|
||
and damp in a rural landscape of furrowed and plowed. Her mother
|
||
had brought her there as a small child, just before the thing had
|
||
happened, the thing she didn't like to think about.
|
||
|
||
And she was here, thinking about it. Pondering all the what-ifs,
|
||
the first tender tears trying to well up in her heart.
|
||
|
||
'Why did I come here?' she was heard to think to herself. 'Things
|
||
were going so well...'
|
||
|
||
Still she trudged along the well-kept trails, half wanting to go
|
||
back to the car and leave, half wanting to go to the place in the
|
||
forest, the place where...
|
||
|
||
She was thinking too much. 'No one can re-live a painful memory in
|
||
such vivid detail as I.'
|
||
|
||
She thought back to that guy, what was his name, the one with the
|
||
useless haircut, the one with the keychain that was a little rubber
|
||
man-shape with chakras marked in rhinestone... Anyway, she had been
|
||
introduced to him at a coffeehouse one time, and had felt strangely
|
||
at ease with his gentle demeanour, which was odd for her. She was
|
||
usually suspicious of friendly people. Over the course of the
|
||
evening, her friends had left her with him, and somehow she had
|
||
told this total strange stranger all about her problems: Her
|
||
mother, herself...
|
||
|
||
He had told her to just breathe, and to think only about breathing.
|
||
She had laughed a cold laugh in his face, just then, but he smiled
|
||
and said, "Well, at least you heard me. You know, most people don't
|
||
have the slightest idea what I mean when I say those things. They
|
||
usually react like you just did, but they laugh because they can
|
||
only see a guy in a tie-dye and sandals.. You laugh because even
|
||
though we've been sharing ourselves, you think I'm a fool for
|
||
believing these things. Its qualitatively better, I guess." and got
|
||
up to get another coffee. He sat back down with someone else,
|
||
leaving her comfortably alone.
|
||
|
||
So, here in the forest, she managed to think about breathing. 'That
|
||
guy. I felt so bad about laughing at him afterward...'
|
||
|
||
So she decided on a whim to take his advice. 'Why the hell not?'
|
||
she cynically decided, smirking. 'He'd get a kick out of knowing I
|
||
was doing this.'
|
||
|
||
She walked on, knowing the trail, having walked it a million times
|
||
in memory and imagination and dream and nightmare. She walked,
|
||
feeling her breathing becoming more even, thinking about her lungs
|
||
and her feet and her hair sticking to her neck, her long brown
|
||
hair, her inhale, her sweat, sticking to her hair, her exhale, the
|
||
muscles in her legs, her inhale... The outside world was a grey
|
||
blurred generality. To think about the forest would remind her
|
||
of... She concentrated again on her walking and breathing.
|
||
|
||
Somewhere, somehow, acceptance comes from within. The Gods shoot
|
||
their lightning bolts and make the sky crack open like an egg,
|
||
spilling a huge yolk of acceptance. It drains into the water supply
|
||
and everyone drinks it, and they all know then that what they've
|
||
been worried about is crap. Its all crap. Not a cynical crap, but a
|
||
humane crap. A crap that you know you can discard, never needing it
|
||
again; a crap that in retrospect is all but trivial.
|
||
|
||
She thought of the path as it stretched in front of her, but she
|
||
didn't see it, didn't even feel it as it hit the soles of her
|
||
shoes. It was in her memory and imagination. Imprinted by years of
|
||
longing, longing for mother, for...
|
||
|
||
Recoil, reclaim, she began to think about breathing again, in...
|
||
out...... in...... and inward it all went. Until she
|
||
noticed the panther leading her by about twelve feet. She continued
|
||
walking, even though the adrenaline told her to run away, run the
|
||
fuck away, move away as quickly as possible. But something made her
|
||
retain her even pace, her forward movement. Either the panther
|
||
didn't know she was there, or it didn't care.
|
||
|
||
She had never imagined it this way, and she was almost denying the
|
||
reality. She felt the panther. She had never felt anything like
|
||
this, from an animal or a person, even her ex-husband. She knew it
|
||
was all there, that she wasn't in any danger, but at the same time
|
||
her brain cried out the desperate cry of religious zealots,
|
||
screaming to her that she make fucking tracks in the opposite
|
||
direction.
|
||
|
||
Her mouth and lungs let out a pitiful grunt of physiological
|
||
confusion, at which the panther stopped, its physical grace present
|
||
even in stillness. She stopped in fright, in abject terror, the
|
||
shockwave realization strapping her body to space. The panther
|
||
turned its head quietly around and glanced at her, then resumed its
|
||
same pace, even footsteps, an even breathing, in, out, pads
|
||
footfalling in even rythm that she recognized, her body recognized,
|
||
from some primal genetic memory.
|
||
|
||
She began to shake, trembling the rivulets of sweat from her skin,
|
||
dripping off the tips of her fingers. The temperature seemed to
|
||
have risen by about a thousand degrees. Her body locked itself,
|
||
every muscle tensed, their combined forces threatening to snap all
|
||
her bones.
|
||
|
||
The forest world became a visual blur. She thought she was going to
|
||
pass out, but she did not. All she could see was a swirl of green
|
||
and grey and brown, and the lithe form of a very large cat as it
|
||
pawed its way along the trail ahead of her. Its rythm reached out
|
||
to her, she saw it. It has a physical grasp on her. She felt it
|
||
wrap a warm feeling around her chest. It reminded her to breathe,
|
||
and she did, and it gently pushed on her back, upsetting her
|
||
balance, and her body took an instinctive step forward. After
|
||
that, her fear-blanked mind was no match for this vaporous tendril
|
||
of incentive which pulled her.
|
||
|
||
No match.
|
||
|
||
She found herself riding a machine, a machine that had once been
|
||
her body. It leapt and started in uneasy syncopation, autonomic
|
||
control systems preventing the vaporous Feeling from causing it to
|
||
crash. She wondered at her future, at the thought of a forest
|
||
creature pulling her into its lair, there to consume her flesh,
|
||
useless frightened flesh.
|
||
|
||
It was taking her somewhere; where, she could not be sure.
|
||
|
||
Illogic tore her brain into tiny pieces, a tiny voice inside:
|
||
'Where am I being led? Who can save me? I'm scared! Mommy! John!
|
||
Help me!' but she was alone, with the cat. On it sauntered, pulling
|
||
her like a toy soldier.
|
||
|
||
Seeming hours later, an etheric blue wave of feeling came from the
|
||
panther. It stroked her fears, her muscles. The desperation, the
|
||
tension washed from her like a flash flood. Gone.
|
||
|
||
Gone. She could breathe, she had motor control back. She no longer
|
||
saw the green pulling thing, but she knew it was there. She still
|
||
could not resist it.
|
||
|
||
She saw the cat look back, and then her field of vision widened to
|
||
see that she was nowhere she had been before. She could not
|
||
remember this place from her memory or imagination. She had never
|
||
dreamed a place like this. It was still the forest, still
|
||
indigenous, still the same, but very... very different.
|
||
|
||
Then she was released and abruptly fell to her knees. The world
|
||
swam, the forest floor seemed to be alive, covered with insects and
|
||
other moist things, the trees were tuning forks, vibrating in the
|
||
slowest motion, agitated by the breeze. She concentrated and the
|
||
cat was an inch from her face, purring.
|
||
|
||
Then it began to clean her face. The broad tounge coarse, though
|
||
moist and pleasurable. Her mind gave up and she fell forward,
|
||
arms instinctively embracing the big cat in exhaustion. It lay down
|
||
under her, and continued its cleaning.
|
||
|
||
Her head resting on the wide shoulder, she felt the thrumming purr
|
||
of pleasure, saw the contented twitch of the black-tipped tail,
|
||
felt the warm tounge making swaths across her neck, then her
|
||
shoulders... Then the sound of speaking, only deep from within the
|
||
soul of the most ancient of panthers, a feline language, a very
|
||
gentle and very deep and very... motherly sound, said, "You are
|
||
absolved."
|
||
|
||
[*] (Homer the Brave)
|
||
|
||
----Homey-Note--------------------------------------------
|
||
Jeez, Homey ... that gave me chills, man. Hope you don't
|
||
mind the re-arrangement; the original that you uploaded turned
|
||
out to be one *extremely* long sentence ... that's right, one.
|
||
Had to manually break it into what you see above. Fkking c00l,
|
||
dude!!1!1@
|
||
Ä-Ä-------------------------------------------------------
|
||
|
||
|
||
|
||
|
||
|
||
|
||
ILLUSION
|
||
|
||
A BLANK MIRROR-GUNFIRE-BLOOD & PUS-WATCH OUT FOR THAT TIGER!-MORE
|
||
OF THE SAME-THOUGHTS, ILLEGIBLE, ON WADED UP SHEETS OF PAPER,
|
||
LITTER THE FLOOR-SILENCE-A SCREAM-MORE OF THE SAME GO AWAY-LEAVE ME
|
||
THE HELL ALONE-GRAB THE GUN-PUT IT DOWN-FOCUS ON THE POET'S
|
||
FACE-PICKS UP THE GUN, LIGHTS A CIGARETTE, FLUSHES THE Toilet-I
|
||
LOVE YOU-COME HERE-I REALLY DO LOVE YOU-`WILL YOU DIE FOR ME?'
|
||
|
||
[*] (william burroughs)
|
||
|
||
|
||
|
||
|
||
|
||
|
||
|
||
In Early Morning
|
||
|
||
In early morning,
|
||
her voice comes to me from the answering machine.
|
||
The sound evokes small trickles of pleasure
|
||
reminder of happier days.
|
||
Happiness now lost with only remote possibility of return.
|
||
She speaks to me in ways only a lover can.
|
||
|
||
In early morning,
|
||
our hearts almost meet again
|
||
reminding me of feelings which lie buried
|
||
beneath a monument of tears, pain and failed attempts to forget.
|
||
The memories and feelings cling to my spirit,
|
||
deriding visions of a future that might have been.
|
||
|
||
In early morning,
|
||
the sadness retreats a short distance.
|
||
Granting relief from pain for all too brief an instant.
|
||
Revealing glimpses of happiness now lost.
|
||
The sadness endures in her absence
|
||
Broken only by her voice when we next talk again.
|
||
|
||
|
||
[*] (cosmic coyote)
|
||
|
||
|
||
|
||
|
||
|
||
Vampire
|
||
|
||
for seven years in single days
|
||
and seven nights in sweet torment
|
||
i was
|
||
so very
|
||
stoned
|
||
|
||
on that beauty.
|
||
|
||
a vampires wet dream sucking kiss
|
||
a cigarette smoking open wound
|
||
follows her memory resident bliss
|
||
the whole way to the tomb.
|
||
|
||
addicted written seduction goes
|
||
the friction fades, the answer soon
|
||
would it were for me to know
|
||
and seal my empty tomb.
|
||
|
||
a cigarette burns my lungs away
|
||
in cliche mocking silent gloom
|
||
i need yr memory here to stay
|
||
with me inside my tomb.
|
||
|
||
a vampires written sucking bliss
|
||
ill walk beside, despite my wound
|
||
and well follow memory resident bliss
|
||
the whole way to the Womb.
|
||
|
||
for seven lifetimes single days
|
||
and one night on the Inside, man
|
||
i was
|
||
so very
|
||
stoned
|
||
on that beauty.
|
||
|
||
|
||
[*] (xann) ...definitely THE man(N).
|
||
|
||
|
||
|
||
|
||
|
||
|
||
A Portion of the novel, _Mount_
|
||
|
||
by Brandon Aubrey (AKA "Mount") & Lance Hatcher
|
||
|
||
|
||
Oh yes, Harvey Lee had bought many a soul on his
|
||
journey, and he was going to buy one more tonight.
|
||
Buy it and deliver it in one big rip, C.O.D. Master, goods on
|
||
your doorsteps, her soul is yours, you know, used, abused, but
|
||
soul still intact. The girl, of course, thought she was Harvey
|
||
Lee's lover, and thought Harvey Lee was just a glorified
|
||
egocentric rock star, and even thought that the whole business
|
||
up on the mountain had something to do with a Christmas concert
|
||
or something.
|
||
But she was nothing to Harvey Lee. A pretty face and a pretty
|
||
body and a decent sex dancer, but not much more. A possession,
|
||
Harvey Lee's very own, the one he had never shared with anyone
|
||
else. She had been quite a find, a cherubic babe with flair.
|
||
Harvey Lee had taken her off the ice rink at sixteen, a literal
|
||
virgin, but Harvey Lee had quickly fixed that. Since then,
|
||
she'd been just his, his alone, and now, he'd give her up for
|
||
his Master and wait and see if his request was granted. But
|
||
being a possession, it wasn't a sacrifice, it was just a gift, a
|
||
tribute to his lord.
|
||
What Harvey Lee really wanted for Christmas was a big fat juicy
|
||
bloody great-grandmother of a mutilating, pain creating, hell
|
||
raising Earthquake. Satan Clause, won't you take this bitch and
|
||
grant Harvey Lee's wish?
|
||
John brought her out. She wore a red silk dress, red slippers,
|
||
and she was smiling, no clue at all. Harvey Lee even smiled
|
||
back.
|
||
"Hello, Jessie," Harvey Lee said.
|
||
"Howdy, Harvey," she said, smiling. "What's all this?"
|
||
"Oh, you'll see, nothing much, just one of my little
|
||
ceremonies."
|
||
She grinned knowingly, "Out here, in front of everybody?"
|
||
Harvey Lee nodded affirmative.
|
||
"Kinky," she said.
|
||
"Lay up here," Harvey Lee said.
|
||
Jessie jumped up on the stone pedestal, and lay down, smiling.
|
||
S & M was one of her favorites, exhibitionism being the other.
|
||
Harvey Lee took four lengths of rope and tied her legs and arms
|
||
down.
|
||
Harvey Lee then ripped her dress off of her.
|
||
"Harvey," she moaned.
|
||
"Shut-up," he said. He turned and looked out at his follower,
|
||
all of whom starred with excitement in their eyes. Harvey Lee
|
||
wondered if he should make up some ritual ceremony, but decided
|
||
against it. Hell, this was between him and his master.
|
||
He turned back to Jessie, still smiling, and said softly,
|
||
"Jessie, you've been a pretty good bitch. I have to admit that
|
||
and thank you. I know you'll have fun where you're going."
|
||
Harvey looked up, and spoke to the Master of the Air. "You
|
||
know what I want, Master. So I'm giving you this bitch, take
|
||
her and give me what I need."
|
||
Harvey Lee spoke two e-vil sounding words, and shouted a third.
|
||
He pulled a long silver knife out of his scabbard, and clutched
|
||
it in both hands, raising it high over Jessie's breast.
|
||
Jessie's eyes lit up in mock horror. Damn, she thought,
|
||
Harvey's being so realistic!
|
||
Harvey closed his eyes and prepared to bring the knife down.
|
||
A car honked somewhere behind him, and several people began to
|
||
scream.
|
||
Harvey Lee turned and looked. The White Cadillac was driving
|
||
through the throng of Waste-heads and coming straight at Harvey
|
||
Lee.
|
||
The Ghost stopped just five yards from Harvey Lee. Galahad
|
||
leaped out of the driver's seat.
|
||
"Hold it right there, Wilson," Harvey Lee shouted. "One step
|
||
and I'll cut this bitch's throat."
|
||
Harvey Lee was compromised with the knife in his hands, so he
|
||
bullshited. If he could just keep them back a few steps, he
|
||
could get his hands free and show them some real power.
|
||
Galahad stepped forward, "She's your bitch," he said. "Do what
|
||
you want."
|
||
Mount and Gwen and Spring got out of the other side of the car.
|
||
"Hey," Mount said, genuinely surprised. "I know that chick."
|
||
Harvey Lee turned his head and glared at the person he hated
|
||
more than any other. "Yeah," Mount said. "I've got something
|
||
of hers."
|
||
Mount reached into his jean-jacket pocket and pulled out
|
||
the panties. He threw them so they landed right on Jessie's
|
||
belly. Harvey Lee turned and looked down and saw the initials
|
||
embroidered on the panties. 'H.L.'
|
||
Harvey Lee went into a fit of rage. Rather then drop his knife
|
||
and use his free hands and other-worldly powers, he ran at Mount
|
||
with knife raised.
|
||
Mount stepped aside at the last moment, and Harvey Lee went
|
||
flying, falling into the snow.
|
||
Harvey Lee got up, turned, screamed, and dropped the knife.
|
||
He raised his hands high into the air.
|
||
A burst of electricity leapt from his fingers, straight at
|
||
Mount. Mount took an involuntary step back, and then raised his
|
||
arm, Black Cross held in his hand.
|
||
The rays and waves of e-vil electrons hit Mount, and caused the
|
||
Cross to expand into a wave of nothing, a sheet of space that
|
||
went somewhere, perhaps everywhere, else.
|
||
The Cross grew, but kept its shape. Harvey Lee added intensity
|
||
to the flux. Mount stepped forward, pushing the Cross, which
|
||
was now dense and wet, forward.
|
||
One step at a time, Mount reached Harvey Lee.
|
||
Harvey Lee stepped back.
|
||
Now, the crowd of Waste-heads were coming at Mount from behind
|
||
and from the sides. Galahad and Mount's sisters blocked them
|
||
the best they could, but they were only eight. Gwen would
|
||
partake in no physical violence.
|
||
"I've beat you this time," Harvey Lee said.
|
||
And Mount realized he was right. People were running towards
|
||
him from all sides. In addition, The Cross had grown to nearly
|
||
fifteen feet tall, and was still growing. It took all of
|
||
Mount's strength to keep it from toppling over on him.
|
||
Mount saw nothing but black, so he never fully realized what
|
||
happened. But Galahad saw it all.
|
||
From Harvey Lee's side of the Cross, a grayish, wasted,
|
||
corpse-like arm reached out slowly, and then a face. Harvey Lee
|
||
saw it and directed his beams at it, but it kept coming. Soon
|
||
their was a shoulder, and another arm, and then suddenly, a face
|
||
and a neck.
|
||
Harvey Lee's flux of light was too bright, and Galahad could
|
||
not make out the face, but he heard what Harvey Lee said.
|
||
The arms reached out through the flux of e-vil electrons and
|
||
grabbed Harvey Lee by the shoulders. The figure pulled Harvey
|
||
Lee into the Cross, into the hole, through the door.
|
||
And Harvey Lee screamed, "FATHER!"
|
||
And that was it.
|
||
The Cross diminished to its normal size and fell into the snow.
|
||
Mount stood there, looking confused, muttered. "What the fuck?"
|
||
And the crowd of Waste-heads started slowly to step back, not
|
||
sure what had just happened, not sure that they wanted to know,
|
||
but knowing they didn't want to have anything to do with Mount
|
||
McKinley and his Cross.
|
||
Within five minutes, the once cohesive caravan had split into
|
||
about five hundred cars fleeing for their lives.
|
||
And Mount just stood there, wondering how and why.
|
||
Galahad walked over to him, said, "Good work."
|
||
Galahad shook his head approvingly.
|
||
"I think they shut off the weather," Hope said, pointing out
|
||
over the basin of L.A. There, a hole in the clouds had opened,
|
||
and another hole to the South, and one way out over the Ocean.
|
||
The holes where growing with amazing rapidity, and you could see
|
||
the stars.
|
||
Gwen walked over to Mount and padded him on the back.
|
||
"Good Work," she said.
|
||
"What's next?" Spring asked.
|
||
"Honey," Galahad said. "The next thing for us to do is to
|
||
bring this good, important, powerful, potentially dangerous work
|
||
to the world, without at the same time bringing any bad karma
|
||
down upon ourselves."
|
||
"Just how are we going to do that?" Mount wondered aloud.
|
||
"I know," Gwen said. "You do it for Love, not money. For
|
||
Humanity, not country. For your posterity, not pride. For
|
||
Hope, not fear. You must care, and smile honestly, and believe
|
||
what you are doing is right."
|
||
"This mission isn't over yet, Mount," Galahad said.
|
||
"It's not?"
|
||
"No. Sorry, brother."
|
||
"Well, I suppose we can't take a long enough break to get these
|
||
girls back to their mother, can't we?"
|
||
"Why sure, Mount, and there's still plenty of country these
|
||
girls haven't seen. Time to see the world."
|
||
"Cool," Summer said.
|
||
"Yeah," River said. "Screw School. Let's just hang with
|
||
Galahad."
|
||
Galahad turned to Gwen and asked, "You up for the trip, sister?"
|
||
"Well, maybe--"
|
||
"I do believe as an equal opportunity religious believer you
|
||
should allow young Mount here a chance to convert you to his own
|
||
brand of Love and Trust. You Catholic's did it to the Indians,
|
||
you owe a karmic debt."
|
||
"Well--"
|
||
"Yeah, sister, why not?" Winter said. "Mount's never had a
|
||
girlfriend, so maybe you could hang out with him and pretend so
|
||
everybody won't think our brother is so weird."
|
||
"Sure," she said. "I guess I was born for the road."
|
||
So the McKinley clan and Galahad the cultural outlaw and the
|
||
Angel rolled on down the mountain. After they reached the end
|
||
of the mountain road and turned back on the highway, something
|
||
began to bother Mount, and he couldn't figure out just what the
|
||
heck it was.
|
||
They were about halfway back to L.A. before Mount realized what
|
||
it was.
|
||
"Galahad?"
|
||
"Yeah, buddy."
|
||
"I hope I'm wrong, but did we, or didn't we leave that babe
|
||
tied up there to that rock."
|
||
Everyone in the car looked at each other.
|
||
"I think we did," Galahad said.
|
||
"Yeah," the girls said.
|
||
"I can't believe I did that," Gwen said.
|
||
"Whoa," Galahad said. "That would have been some heavy bad
|
||
karma. Girls, we're trying to set ourselves up for failure.
|
||
You should thank the Lord you got such a smart big brother.
|
||
Mount, you stopped a bad cycle, that's a good sign for you."
|
||
Galahad made a big U-Turn and drove back up to Mount Wilson.
|
||
When they got there, Galahad got out and un-tied girl and helped
|
||
her put on her tattered dress and helped her into the Ghost.
|
||
"That had to be the biggest tease job ever," she said. "What
|
||
the hell happened to Harvey Lee?"
|
||
No one answered her, no one knew quite how. Jessie turned to
|
||
Mount and said, "Thanks for coming all this way to bring my
|
||
panties back to me. What the hell did you want them for in the
|
||
first place?"
|
||
Nine sets of eyes turned towards Mount McKinley.
|
||
"Yeah, Mount," Winter said, "What did you want with a pair of
|
||
panties?"
|
||
"Kinky," River said, "I didn't know you had it in you."
|
||
"Mount, baby," Spring said, "You've got seven sisters, if you
|
||
wanted a pair of panties, all you had to do was ask. You didn't
|
||
have to go to a complete stranger."
|
||
Mount met eyes with Galahad through the rear-view mirror.
|
||
Galahad smiled a shy, knowing grin, and then turned his gaze
|
||
away. He drove on.
|
||
"I was on a mission from God," Mount McKinley said.
|
||
|
||
[*]
|
||
|
||
===================--------------------====================
|
||
|
||
If you dug that, you can download the entire novel from
|
||
HoWL (713-862-1415), as well as leave any feedback, sug-
|
||
gestions, etc., to Brandon ... he's known as 'Mount' on
|
||
the board. He'd dig hearing what you think .. be it
|
||
good, bad or indifferent. By the time this issue of Tamer
|
||
is released ... _MounT_ should be available in a hyper-
|
||
text version. So download it MAN!!
|
||
|
||
===================--------------------====================
|
||
|
||
|
||
Uh, ... so ends number four. Shit, ... I really slacked on this
|
||
one. Sorry it took so long. And thanks for all the uploads. Some
|
||
of you probably noticed that everything you sent was not in this
|
||
issue ... too much. I'm hanging on to it for number five. Peace..
|
||
|
||
Submissions: HoWL BBS
|
||
713.862.1415
|
||
|
||
|
||
|