184 lines
8.5 KiB
Plaintext
184 lines
8.5 KiB
Plaintext
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Random Access Humor - The Electronic Humor Magazine
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Writer's Guidelines
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Random Access Humor (RAH) was originally formed within the deep
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psychoses from which the editor suffers. If it's going to last for
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long, the support of the online community (as well as the psychiatric
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community) will be needed. Many people out there seem to think that
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they're comedians. Here is their chance to prove it.
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There are two basic forms of submission being sought for publication
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in RAH: Articles, fillers and taglines. No, *three* basic forms of
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submission.
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Articles are humorous collections of words which should be somewhat
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related to the BBS/Online world, or at least personal computing.
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Articles should be between 200 and 2000 words in length. High
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quality longer articles may be accepted and published in serial form
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if necessary.
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Fillers are humorous tidbits less than 200 words long. These can be
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jokes or anecdotes. They must definitely be funny.
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Taglines should be self explanatory. You may submit a few at a time
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if you'd like. We only want funny taglines for publication here.
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Language and content: Harsh language is not allowed in RAH. This is
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a "PG" rated publication. Double entendres are allowed, provided
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they are witty and subtle. Childish, scatological humor is not
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welcome in RAH. We are looking for "mature" humor, but not adult
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humor. All submissions should be witty, but not abusive. Make fun
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of online institutions and personality types, not individual persons.
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For example, it's OK to make fun of Compu$erve, but not OK to make
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fun of Joe Smith, who hangs out on Compu$erve. Public figures, like
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politicians, are always fair game for humorists.
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Style:
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Since RAH is steeped in the online world, it follows that RAH should
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support the style of writing generally found in online messages.
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This does not include the semi-literate, mostly obscene trash found
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in conferences such as the FidoNet FLAME echo. It *does* include
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some of the basic online writing conventions. There is one in the
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previous sentence, did you see it? The asterisks around "*does*" in
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the previous sentence indicate that the word is being emphasized, but
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the writer IS NOT SHOUTING. Remember that the use of all caps in an
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online message indicates that the writer is shouting. Shouting is
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considered rude in the online world, just as in real life.
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Another important facet of online writing is the use of acronyms
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for common phrases, which tends to save bytes in writing that is
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being shipped around the country or world at someone's expense. Here
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is a brief list of a few common online writing acronyms:
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BTW By the way
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FYI For your information
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IMHO In my humble opinion
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OTOH On the other hand
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ROFL Rolling on floor, laughing
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TPTB The powers that be
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There are many more. Another online custom which needs mentioning is
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the practice of placing action statements in between "<>" signs, for
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example: <grin>, <evil laughter>, <ducking and running>. These
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action indicators can be used to good effect, and humor, so they are
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welcome here. Like everything, they are best used in moderation.
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One online custom which will not be welcome in the pages of RAH is
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the practice of including smiley faces { :-) } or variations on that
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theme. I use these myself in messages, but they have no place in the
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semi-serious writing being published in RAH. Remember, writing humor
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can be a very serious business. Besides, humorists are not supposed
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to laugh at their own jokes.
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Legalities:
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In writing jargon, RAH is deemed to be given "One Time Rights" to
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anything submitted for publication unless otherwise noted in the
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message accompanying the contribution. You still own the material,
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and RAH will make no use of the material other than publishing it
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electronically in the usual manner. The only exception is that your
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article may be selected for publication in a planned annual "Best of
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RAH" electronic book.
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RAH is copyrighted and each issue is registered with the U.S.
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Copyright Office. Rights revert to the author after publication. If
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you want your own copyright notice to appear in your article, place
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it as desired in the text you submit. Previously published articles
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may be submitted, but proper acknowledgement must be included:
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periodical name, date of previous publication. In some cases you
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must obtain the permission of the previous publisher before your work
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may be published in RAH. Simultaneous submissions are accepted.
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RAH can accept only the following types of material for publication:
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1) Any material in the public domain.
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2) Material for which you own the copyright. If you wrote it
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yourself, you are automatically the copyright holder.
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3) Authorized agents for a copyright holder (typically an
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organization) may submit material on behalf of that holder.
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Payment:
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RAH is given away to the online public and accepts no advertising,
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so obviously we can offer no payment to writers. It should be noted
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that RAH is distributed throughout North America and Europe each
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month, and each issue may remain in the file libraries of boards for
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years. A few issues have even found their way to Australia. So RAH
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is an excellent vehicle for getting your writing known to the online
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reading public. Payment may be offered to writers in the future. In
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this event, writers who contributed to RAH in the early years will be
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given preferential treatment.
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It is currently planned to compensate authors whose original articles
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are selected for the "Best of RAH" Annual. Rates have not as yet
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been established. Authors whose work has appeared in RAH may also be
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invited to submit additional original material for the RAH Annual.
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How to Submit Material to RAH:
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Contributions to RAH are always welcome. All submissions must be
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made electronically. File attach your article to a netmail message
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to Dave Bealer at 1:261/1129. E-mail may also be sent via Internet
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to: dbealer@access.digex.net
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Users who do not have netmail or Internet access should ask their
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local RAH distribution sysop if he/she would be willing to send in
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your article for you.
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Tagline and filler submissions may be made via e-mail. Article
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submissions should be made via file. Submitted files must be plain
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ASCII text files in normal MS-DOS file format: artname.RAH; where
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artname is a descriptive file name and RAH is the mandatory
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extension. Your text should be less than 70 columns across for
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widest readability. If your article does not conform to these simple
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specs, it may get lost or trashed. Also note that such imaginative
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names as RAH.RAH might get overlaid by the blatherings of similarly
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minded contributors. If your hardware is incapable of producing file
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names in the proper format, you may send your article as one or more
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e-mail messages.
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You may manually upload your submission to the RAH Publication BBS:
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The Puffin's Nest BBS
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(410) 437-3463
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1200-14400 bps (V.32bis)
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Make your upload in any area. All uploads go to a private area for
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perusal by the sysop before being posted for download. Make sure to
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indicate in the description that the file is a submission for RAH.
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The Puffin's Nest (TPN) contains many files pertaining to electronic
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publishing. TPN also carries the conferences of the Electronic
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Publishing Network (EPubNet). Limited Access on your first call.
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If you have absolutely no way of getting your submission to RAH via
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modem, you may make your submission via diskette. Your disk must be
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in MS-DOS format (5.25" or 3.5", high or low density) and the file(s)
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should consist of plain ASCII text, with no word processor control
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codes. Mail your diskette to:
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Random Access Humor
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P.O. Box 595
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Pasadena, MD. 21122 USA
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The editors will attempt to respond personally to all submissions and
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correspondence received. As the volume of mail increases this may
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become impossible for *every* message. Mailed contributions that do
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not have an e-mail return address cannot be acknowledged at all
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unless accompanied by an SASE. Make sure to include a valid e-mail
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return address with all submissions. All submissions should be
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accepted or rejected within 30 days. If you do not receive a reply
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within that time, resend your contribution. Mail does get lost on
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BBS systems.
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The editors reserve the right to publish or not to publish any
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submission as/when they see fit. The editors also reserve the right
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to "edit", or modify any submission prior to publication. This last
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right will rarely be used, typically only to correct spelling or
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grammar misteaks that are not funny.
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Dave Bealer, Editor
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Random Access Humor
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Pasadena, Maryland, USA
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May 30, 1993
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