480 lines
15 KiB
Plaintext
480 lines
15 KiB
Plaintext
.COMMENT: THE BUTTON "CATTLE MUTILATIONS" WILL GIVE YOUR GOLDPAX HYPE v2.1A
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.COMMENT: A RUNTIME ERROR. WHY?? WE DON'T KNOW!! INSPECT IT YOURSELF!!
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.COMMENT: THERE'S NOTHING WRONG - WHY DOESN'T IT JUST SAY THERE ISN'T A
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.COMMENT: TOPIC CALLED THAT??? WHY DON'T I TURN OFF MY CAPSLOCK KEY???
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.COMMENT: THESE ARE QUESTIONS THAT NEED TO BE ANSWERED!!!!
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.COMMENT: IT GIVES YOU A RUNTIME ERROR, SO I LEFT IT THAT WAY.
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.COMMENT: EVIL!! I'M EVIL!!
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.TOPIC:MAIN
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.COMMENT:
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:):):):):):):):):):):):):):):):):):):):):):):):):):):):):):):):):):):):):):):):)
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:):):):):):):):):):):):):):):):):):):):):):):):):):):):):):):):):):):):):):):):)
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:):):):):):):):):):):):):):):):):):):):):):):):):):):):):):):):):):):):):):):):)
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:):):):):):):):):):):):):):):):):):):):):):):):):):):):):):):):):):):):):):):):)
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:):):):ÛÛÛÛÛÛÛÛÛÛÛÛÛÛÛÛÛÛÛÛ):ÛÛÛÛÛÛÛÛÛ:):):):ÛÛÛÛÛÛÛÛÛ:ÛÛÛÛÛÛÛÛÛÛÛÛÛÛÛ:):):):):)
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:):):)ÛÛÛÛÛÛÛÛÛÛÛÛÛÛÛÛÛÛÛÛÛÛ:):ÛÛÛÛÛ:):):):):):ÛÛÛÛÛ:):):ÛÛÛÛÛÛÛÛÛÛÛÛÛÛÛ:):):):)
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:):):)ÛÛÛÛÛÛ:):):):):):)ÛÛÛÛÛ):ÛÛÛÛÛ:):):):):):ÛÛÛÛÛ:):):ÛÛÛÛÛ:):):):ÛÛÛÛÛ:):):)
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:):):)ÛÛÛÛÛ):):):):):):):ÛÛÛÛ):ÛÛÛÛÛ:):):):):):ÛÛÛÛÛ:):):ÛÛÛÛÛ:):):):ÛÛÛÛÛ:):):)
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:):):)ÛÛÛÛÛ):):):):):):):ÛÛÛÛ):ÛÛÛÛÛ:):):):):):ÛÛÛÛÛ:):):ÛÛÛÛÛ:):):):ÛÛÛÛÛ:):):)
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:):):)ÛÛÛÛÛ):):):):):):):ÛÛÛÛ):ÛÛÛÛÛ:):):):):):ÛÛÛÛÛ:):):ÛÛÛÛÛ:):):):ÛÛÛÛÛ:):):)
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:):):)ÛÛÛÛÛÛ:):):):):):)ÛÛÛÛÛ):ÛÛÛÛÛ:):):):):):ÛÛÛÛÛ:):):ÛÛÛÛÛ:):):):ÛÛÛÛÛ:):):)
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:):):)ÛÛÛÛÛÛÛÛÛÛÛÛÛÛÛÛÛÛÛÛÛÛ:):ÛÛÛÛÛ:):):):):):ÛÛÛÛÛ:):):ÛÛÛÛÛ:):):):ÛÛÛÛÛ:):):)
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:):):)ÛÛÛÛÛÛÛÛÛÛÛÛÛÛÛÛÛÛÛÛÛ):):ÛÛÛÛÛ:):):):):):ÛÛÛÛÛ:):):ÛÛÛÛÛ:):):):ÛÛÛÛÛ:):):)
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:):):)ÛÛÛÛÛ):):):):):):):):):):ÛÛÛÛÛ:):):):):):ÛÛÛÛÛ:):):ÛÛÛÛÛ:):):):ÛÛÛÛÛ:):):)
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:):):)ÛÛÛÛÛ):):):):):):):):):):ÛÛÛÛÛ:):):):):):ÛÛÛÛÛ:):):ÛÛÛÛÛ:):):):ÛÛÛÛÛ:):):)
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:):):)ÛÛÛÛÛ):):):):):):):):):):ÛÛÛÛÛ:):):):):):ÛÛÛÛÛ:):):ÛÛÛÛÛ:):):):ÛÛÛÛÛ:):):)
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:):):)ÛÛÛÛÛ):):):):):):):):):):ÛÛÛÛÛ:):):):):):ÛÛÛÛÛ:):):ÛÛÛÛÛ:):):):ÛÛÛÛÛ:):):)
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:):):)ÛÛÛÛÛ):):):):):):):);):):ÛÛÛÛÛ:):):):):):ÛÛÛÛÛ:):):ÛÛÛÛÛ:):):):ÛÛÛÛÛ:):):)
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:):):)ÛÛÛÛÛ):):):):):):):):):):ÛÛÛÛÛ:):):):):):ÛÛÛÛÛ:):):ÛÛÛÛÛ:):):):ÛÛÛÛÛ:):):)
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:):):)ÛÛÛÛÛ):):):):):):):):):):ÛÛÛÛÛÛÛÛÛÛÛÛÛÛÛÛÛÛÛÛÛ:):):ÛÛÛÛÛÛÛÛÛÛÛÛÛÛÛ:):):):)
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:):):)ÛÛÛÛÛ):):):):):):):):):):)ÛÛÛÛÛÛÛÛÛÛÛÛÛÛÛÛÛÛÛ):):ÛÛÛÛÛÛÛÛÛÛÛÛÛÛÛ:):):):):)
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:):):):):):):):):):):):):):):):):):):):):):):):):):):):):):):):):):):):):):):):)
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:):):):):):):):):):):):):):):):):):):):):):):):):):):):):):):):):):):):):):):):)
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:):):):):):):):):):):):):):):):):):):):):):):):):):):):):):):):):):):):):):):):)
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:):):):):):):):):):):):):):):):):):):):):):):):):):):):):):):):):):):):):):):):)
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:):):):):):):):):):):):):):):):):):):):):):):):):):):):):):):):):):):):):):):):)
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:):):):):):):):):):):):):):):):):):):):):):):):):):):):):):):):):):):):):):):):)
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:):):):):):ÚÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄ¿):):):):):)
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:):):):):):³ ~Cattle Mutilations~ ³):):):):):)
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:):):):):):³ ~Job Hunting~ ³):):):):):)
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:):):):):):³ ~CORRECTION~ ³):):):):):)
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:):):):):):³ WHaT'S In ÚÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄ¿ mI IDe Ha ³):):):):):)
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:):):):):):³ THiS K-K0 ³:):):):):):):):):):):):):):):):)³ RD DRiVE ³):):):):):)
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:):):):):):³ 0L IssUe ³:):):):):):):):):):):):):):):):)³ HaZ N0 Ba ³):):):):):)
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:):):):):):³ of PuD, d ³:):):):):):):):):):):):):):):):)³ D SeCTuRz ³):):):):):)
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:):):):):):³ U0D? Iz I ³:):):):):):):):):):):):):):):):)³ Or AnYTHi ³):):):):):)
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:):):):):):³ t EXtERNa ³:):):):):):):):):):):):):):):):)³ Ng LiKE T ³):):):):):)
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:):):):):):³ L Or INtE ³:):):):):):):):):):):):):):):):)³ HaT! Itz ³):):):):):)
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:):):):):):³ RNaL, dU0 ³:):):):):):):):):):):):):):):):)³ a K-L0K ³):):):):):)
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:):):):):):³ D?!?!!11? ÀÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÙ DaTs WHy! ³):):):):):)
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:):):):):):³ ~Button:Addresses Text:Other Stuff~ ³):):):):):)
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:):):):):):³ ~Inside Information~ ³):):):):):)
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:):):):):):³ ~Button:[MaF] Text:[MaF] ASCii Gallery II~ ³):):):):):)
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:):):):):):ÀÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÙ):):):):):)
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:):):):):):):):):):):):):):):):):):):):):):):):):):):):):):):):):):):):):):):):)
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:):):):):):):):):):):):):):):):):):):):):):):):):):):):):):):):):):):):):):):):)
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:):):):):):):):):):):):):):):):):):):):):):):):):):):):):):):):):):):):):):):):)
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[MaF]):):):):):):):):):):):):):):):):):):):):):):):):):):):):):):):):):):):):):)
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.END:MAIN
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---------------
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.TOPIC:Cattle Mutilations
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.WINDOW:
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.END:Cattle Mutilations
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---------------
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.TOPIC:CORRECTION
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.WINDOW:5,0,6,0,7,0,5,5,70,17
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Even with the welterweight of NC's death on our shoulders, PuD
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continues to be the most prestigous and most outspoken K_RaD T/FiLE
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there is. However, even the divine chosen ones here in LiMA make
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mistakes. Well, they're not mistakes. They're just changes in plan
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which are later elaborated on. Yhea.
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Anyway, last night as I was sleeping I had a dream...
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"Mandy... Mandy... Wake up, honey."
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"Whu... whu.. huh?"
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"Mandy... It's me... NC... Your former S&M sex fiend lust slave."
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"Huh? I'm still a virgin though! ...can you turn in to a dog?"
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"Mandy... I'm not your mom, and thank goodness I am not your
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brother. I have come to bring you sad news, Mandy, of many
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things."
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I was unsure about this. Even though NC used to spank me in the
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back room of Colombo Yogurt as I had so vehemently demanded,
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I was apprehensive about trusting a dead person.
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"Uh... NC... What is it you want from me? I gave you lots of free
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yogurt when you were alive... What do you want now?"
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"Mandy, You have taken my place in many areas of my past existence.
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It is very important that you let things be known... things that
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I would of let known if I had the time..."
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"But NC, I hate the world. I hate everybody. I am not even a
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member of my own family anymore. Why would I want to let
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public earth-shattering information that would save this
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god-forsaken planet?"
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"Do it for me, Mandy. Think of all of our good times together...
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Walking in the park... Clog-Dancing at the Western Sizzler...
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Throwing cats in front of Jeff's House... Do you remember when we
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liberated that pylon in your own frontyard? Wasn't that fun?
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Don't you want to feel that good about yourself again? The way to
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do it is to simply let known what I have to say."
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"Uhhh... Ok, what is it that I must tell the world?
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"Baphomet and I had a lot of K-K00L phun with PuD. I am glad that
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He, Hymie, Crowe and even Squinky continue without me. I am happy
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to see the greatness of PuD still influencing every aspect of life
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even though I am gone. Baphomet has done well... kill him."
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"NC, you said that all I had to do was tell people stuff... you
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didn't say I had to kill anybody!"
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"Mandy, you're too stupid and too caught up with yourself to
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know the difference. Do it anyway."
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"But... We're getting married! I love Chris... he's the light
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of my life... and the sex isn't bad either... plus, he buys
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me things... like Krystals and stuff."
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"Take out a big life insurance policy on him after you get
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married. Kill him then."
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"Ok."
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"Is that all you want?"
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"No. The most important thing I must make you tell everybody
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you see. You must tell everybody you talk to on the
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telephone when you get ungrounded. You must tellk this to
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every single soul on the planet before you die... and you
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never know when you might die."
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"What is so important?"
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"Like I said earlier, Baphomet and I had lots of PHuN with PuD.
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We had lots of things to say. However, before I died, I never
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got to mention something that was always on my mind...
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Something that screamed for attention so badly that somehow it
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was deprived. This something was the force, the root of evil
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that gave me reason to publicize my knowledge and perhaps save
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a soul fromn this sort of demon. This evil is so dreadful that
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it gave me the strength to fight against such lameness and
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stupidity. It made me do PuD."
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"What is this demon, NC? What is this evil - so evil - that
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you could not mention it in PuD in the world of the living?
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What is it?
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"Mandy my love... my sweetheart... my Pooky-wooky... this evil
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is simply the middle name... the middle name of death... the
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middle name of evil... the middle name of Satan and all
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hellions commanded by him."
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"What is this name, NC? What is this name?
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"All evils in this dimension feed on the word... they feed on
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every syllable... every evil phonetic curve and twist in its
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pronounciation. Do you have the nerve to let known this word,
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my little cutey-pie?
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"Yes NC... I can do it. I can do anything. I can put my
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feet behind my head.
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"Alright... I shall pass this name unto you, though my soul
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will forever slice, dice, and mince in unrest, torment and
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strife because of my action. My soul will forever be
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stained with the burden of conscience... the conscience of
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knowing what I have done. ALL EVIL HAS A NAME, AND IT'S
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NAME IS SIMANT."
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.END:CORRECTION
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---------------
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.TOPIC:[MaF]
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.WINDOW:15,0,4,0,5,0,1,15,50,13
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THE /\/\OOGA /\SCii /=ANATIC ASCii GALLERY II:
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An exploration in TheEdlin FONTS
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~Outline~
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~Big Outline~
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~Thick Outline~
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~Medium~
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~Rounded~
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~Small Rounded~
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~Raster~
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~Shadow~
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~Medieval~
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.END:[MaF]
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-------------
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.TOPIC:Outline
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.WINDOW:7,0,7,0,7,0,1,1,78,23
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ÚÄ¿
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ÚÄ¿ À¿À¿
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ÀÄÙ ³ ³
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³ ³
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ÚÄ¿ ÚÙÚÙ
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ÀÄÙ ÀÄÙ
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.END:Outline
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-------------
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.TOPIC:Big Outline
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.WINDOW:7,0,7,0,7,0,1,1,78,23
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ÚÄÄ¿
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À¿ À¿
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ÚÄÄ¿ ³ ³
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ÀÄÄÙ ³ ³
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³ ³
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ÚÄÄ¿ ³ ³
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ÀÄÄÙ ÚÙ ÚÙ
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ÀÄÄÙ
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.END:Big Outline
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----------------
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.TOPIC:Thick Outline
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.WINDOW:7,0,7,0,7,0,1,1,78,23
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ÜÜÜ
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ÛßÛ ÛÜßÛ
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ÛßÛ ÜÛ Û
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ßßß ÛÜÛß
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.END:Thick Outline
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---------
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.TOPIC:Medium
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.WINDOW:7,0,7,0,7,0,1,1,78,23
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Ä¿
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o ³
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o ³
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ÄÙ
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.END:Medium
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--------------------
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.TOPIC:Rounded
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.WINDOW:7,0,7,0,7,0,1,1,78,23
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ÛÛÛÛÜ
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ÜÜ ßÛÛÛ
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ßÛÛß ÛÛÛ
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ÜÜ ÛÛÛ
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ßÛÛß ÜÛÛÛ
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ÛÛÛÛß
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.END:Rounded
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-----------------
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.TOPIC:Small Rounded
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.WINDOW:7,0,7,0,7,0,1,1,78,23
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ßÛÜ
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ÛÛ ÛÛ
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ÜÜ ÛÛ
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ßß ÜÛß
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.END:Small Rounded
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----------
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.TOPIC:Raster
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.WINDOW:7,0,7,0,7,0,1,1,78,23
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ßß
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ÛÛ ßß
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ßß
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ÛÛ ßß
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ßß
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.END:Raster
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-----------
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.TOPIC:Shadow
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.WINDOW:7,0,7,0,7,0,1,1,78,23
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ÛÛ»
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ÛÛ» ÈÛÛ»
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Èͼ ÛÛº
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ÛÛ» ÛÛº
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Èͼ ÛÛɼ
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Èͼ
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.END:Shadow
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------------
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.TOPIC:Medieval
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.WINDOW:7,0,7,0,7,0,1,1,78,23
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ßÜ
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Û ßÜ
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Û
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Û Û
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ß
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.END:Medieval
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----------
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.TOPIC:Inside Information
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.WINDOW:12,0,7,0,7,0,1,1,78,23
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You Suck.
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.END:Inside Information
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---------------
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.TOPIC:Job Hunting
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.WINDOW:9,0,5,0,6,0,1,1,25,7
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Look at "OTHER STUFF"
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and find out how YOU
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can attain a BOISTROUS
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career in the T/FiLE
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industry!
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.END:Job Hunting
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--------------------
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.TOPIC:Addresses
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.WINDOW:4,0,9,0,5,0,1,1,78,23
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ROLAND <In my Opinion>ÄÄÄÄÄÂÄÄÄÄÄ
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ÚÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄ¿ 1@1 ViRTualNeT ³
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Hymie ³ ³ ³ ³
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84@2506 ³ ³ ÚÄÄÄÄÄ¿ ÚÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄ¿ ³ ³
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WWiV ³ ³ ³ ³ ³ ³ ³ ³ SQUINKY
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MPruitt@nyx.cs.du.edu³ ³ ³ ³ ³ ³ ³ <dunno>
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MPruitt@uahcs2.uah.edu ³ ³ ³ ÚÄÄÄÄÄÄ´ ³ ³
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God@Mt.Olympus.Com ÀÄÄÄÙ ³ ÃÄÄÄÙ ³ ³ ³
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³ ³ ³ ³ ³ ³
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³ ³ ³ ³ ³
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Baphomet the Limbo King ³ ³ ³ ³ ³
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#14@2506 WWiVNET ³ ³ ³ ³ ³
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CRFISHER@NYX.CS.DU.EDU À¿ ³ ³ Ú´ ÀÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄ
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Ú¿ ³ ³ ÄÄÁÁÄÄ
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ÚÄÄÄÂÄÄÄij ÀÅÙ CR0\/\/e
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ÀÄÄÄÅÄÄÄÄÙ ³ ÚÄ¿ ³ ÚÄÄÄÄ ÂÄ¿ 240@2506 WWiVNET
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³ ³³ ³ ³ À¿ ³ ³ ÀÄÙÚÂÄÄ¿ ÚÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄ
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³ ôÚÅ¿ ³ À¿³ ³ ÚÄ¿ ³ ³ÃÄÄÙ ³
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³ ³³ÁÁÙ ³ ÀÙ ³ ³ ³ ÃÅÂÄ¿ ³ [MaF]
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Mandy The Flex-O-Matic ÀÄÄÄÄÙ ³ ÃÅÁÄÙ ÀÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄ¿ 1@1 VNeT
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#36@2506 WWiVNET ÃÁÄÄÄÄÄÄ¿ ÀÄ¿
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MANDY@COLOMBO.YOGURT.COM ÀÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÙ ³ MAIL Us, Be K_RaD,
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ÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÙ ANd Be a PuDidian!
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.END:Addresses
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