1025 lines
40 KiB
Plaintext
1025 lines
40 KiB
Plaintext
From ai815@freenet.carleton.caFri Dec 15 10:04:28 1995
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Date: Fri, 15 Dec 1995 05:52:39 -0500
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From: Greg Erwin <ai815@freenet.carleton.ca>
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To: apabel@prairienet.org, ap818@freenet.buffalo.edu, paracom@cyberstore.ca
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Subject: December 1995 Nullifidian
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/ / (__(__
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) \| (__(__(___(__(__(___(__(__(__(__(__(__/ (__
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===========================================================
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*The*E-Zine*of*Atheistic*Secular*Humanism*and*Freethought**
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############################################################
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###### Volume II, Number 12 ***A Collector's Item!***#####
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################### ISSN 1201-0111 #######################
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####################### DEC 1995 ###########################
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nullifidian, n. & a. (Person) having no religious faith or
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belief. [f. med. L _nullifidius_ f. L _nullus_ none +
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_fides_ faith; see -IAN] Concise Oxford Dictionary
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The purpose of this magazine is to provide a source of
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articles dealing with many aspects of humanism.
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We are ATHEISTIC as we do not believe in the actual
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existence of any supernatural beings or any transcendental
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reality.
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We are SECULAR because the evidence of history and the daily
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horrors in the news show the pernicious and destructive
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consequences of allowing religions to be involved with
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politics or government.
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We are HUMANISTS and we focus on what is good for humanity,
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in the real world. We will not be put off with offers of
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pie in the sky, bye and bye.
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NEW: visit my Home Page at http://infoweb.magi.com/~godfree/
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Re: navigation.
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Search for BEG to find the beginning of the next article.
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Search for the first few words of the title as given in the
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table of contents to find a specific article. I try to
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remember to copy the title from the text and then paste it
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into the ToC, so it should be exact. Search for "crass
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commercialism:" to see what's for sale. Subscription
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information, etc is at the end of the magazine, search for
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END OF TEXTS.
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============================================================
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/=\_/=\/=\_/=\/=\_/=\/=\_/=\/=\_/=\/=\_/=\/=\_/=\/=\_/=\/=\
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TABLE OF CONTENTS
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1. Predictions for 1995 Amateur prophecy
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2. The Pearly Gates, a Sketch by the Frantics
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3. BUDDHISM by: tmwe@maths.nott.ac.uk Tim Eyre
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4. Jokes compiled by Jim Dew
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5. That holiday
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===========================================================
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|| BEGINNING OF ARTICLE ||
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===========================================================
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Predictions for 1995 Amateur prophecy
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These were the predictions made in November and December of
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last year. We said:
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<<Predictions for 1995!! Definitely by unpsychic, dull,
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ordinary type people with no help from any ghosts or other
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supernatural entities. Will we do better, or worse, than
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than the pundits, jeezers and crazies? Check back in
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December 1995!>>
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Here are the results:
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>From the illustrious editor & publisher:
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>>I predict that the Bosnian war will still be sputtering
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along much as it is now. However, it may be that they will
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claim that it has ended. It will not spread to Macedonia in
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1995.
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Wrong! It seems to have nearly ended. A correct prediction
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would have had to specify the Muslim offensives, Serb losses
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in Croatia, and the peace talks.
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A "never wrong" defence would say that there is still some
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fighting going on, and that it did indeed sputter during
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most of the year, so I was right.
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That last was written about a month ago. Now in December, it
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seems to have completely stopped.
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>>There will be a severe famine in Africa.
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Nothing that got in the news, but the situation in the Sudan
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is still pretty bad. I think an honest hit would have
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required something like the Ethiopia thing. Dishonestly,
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there is chronic famine in parts of Africa.
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>>No cure for or vaccine against AIDS will be found.
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Right! If I had predicted a cure, I would have claimed that
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the recently announced day after drug for monkeys fit the
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bill, or that the most recently released palliative drug is
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the cure, or I would say that they cure has been discovered
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but we don't know it for sure yet.
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>>More than one pair of pommy royals will finally break up.
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Queen E will still be around.
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Well, the Chuck & Di break looks pretty final. Queen E is
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still here. Two hits!
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[the best reason for Canada, New Zealand or Australia to
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become a republic: imagine Chuckie's face and EARS on your
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money!]#
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>>#Long term: Canada and Australia will be republics before
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the year 2001.
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Looks bad for Canada, the PM just announced NO intention of
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abandoning the monarchy. Looks good for Australia, where
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support for republic status is high.
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>>The economy of North America and Europe will be about the
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same as now. No big inflation, no real recovery. Employment
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will increase slightly, mainly in the low-paid service
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sector. The reason for this is that all the causes of
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inflation have now been well-hidden among the sectors of the
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economy which are not measured in the various indices.
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Right. Pretty vague prediction, but I think it is accurate
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enough.
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>>The new states of the former Soviet Union will stumble
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along, none will join with the Iranians in taking up Shi'a
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fanaticism. Nasty little fights on the order of Armenia vs
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Azerbaijan will continue without resolution. There will be
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a rise in "nationalist" antiSemitic, Nazi-style fascist,
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irrational political movements. Some of these Nazis will be
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elected in local governments.
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Right. Seeing as I didn't specify any particular states, or
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get very specific, the general tone of the prediction is
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pretty well confirmed. There is still fighting in Armenia
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and Azerbaijan and Georgia. Nationalists have taken over
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many of the Central Asian Republics An impressive
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prediction would have been the fight in Chechnya.
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>>In Europe, the Czech Republic, Slovenia, Hungary and
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Poland will do OK, the rest of Eastern Europe will struggle.
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The European Union will increase in membership. Turkey will
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not be allowed to join in 1995.
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Well, at least Turkey didn't get in. The Czech Republic is
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doing well, I'm not really sure about Slovenia, Hungary and
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Poland, though nothing really awful has happened in any of
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them. I think I based the membership increase on a known
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set of admissions already scheduled.
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>>Castro will die.
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Wrong. [Uh, I meant "Castro" in a symbolic way. What
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really died was CastoISM, this is "proven" by the free
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market reforms in the Cuban economy.]
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>>South Africa will do well. The fanatical whites will
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continue to be a minor irritation without significant
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impact. The rest of sub-Saharan Africa will continue to do
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poorly with at least one and probably two, countries
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suffering severe famine. An incident in the war in Sudan
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will shock and horrify the world.
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South Africa continues to amaze me. The African population
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of South Africa should bottle and market whatever it is that
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they have. The rest of sub Saharan Africa is doing poorly,
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no shining spots of contradiction here. No new severe
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famine, No incident in Sudan. [Of course, there were many
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incidents that occurred in the Sudan, which will be revealed
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later, and when they are they will shock and horrify the
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world, then.]
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>>A famous child star will confess/admit to having been
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molested by Michael Jackson.
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I heard some things through the tabloids, but not
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unequivocally.
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/*****************************************************/
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[From Carol Roberts, indexer and copy editor,
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e-mail: Carol.Roberts@mixcom.com]
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Here are my predictions for 1995:
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>>Michael Jackson and Lisa Marie Presley will split up.
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Unofficially, it could be argued "yes," officially, that is,
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a legal separation or divorce, "no".
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>>The Pope will die.
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Wrong. I guess it was just wishful thinking.
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>>The Second Coming (or first, depending on how you count)
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will not occur.
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Right, pretty safe bet.
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>>Elvis will be sighted in a mall in Scottsdale, Arizona.
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Possibly, I didn't hear about it.
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>>A woman seeking an abortion will be shot by anti-
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abortionists.
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I don't recall such an event. Only the doctors.
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>>The number of reports of child molesting by Catholic
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priests will rise by 50%.
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As far as I can see, my only source of such reports
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(Freethought Today) looks about the same.
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/=\/=\/=\/=\/=\/=\/=\/=\/=\/=\/=\/=\/=\/=\/=\/=\/=\/=\
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from Michael Haggerty
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[who is about as psychic as a fencepost]
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{that is HIS statement} gae
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I made the following predictions a few months back in a post
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on CompuServe and I'm still standing behind them.
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=-=-=-=
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>>There will be more sex scandals in the halls of the US
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congress.
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Well, that fellow (Mr Tongue) was forced out of office.
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Good one!
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>>Another war will break out in Africa before the end of
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this century. Many thousands of innocents will die senselessly.
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Nigeria's a good candidate. Liberia, Sierra Leone, Sudan
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are currently fighting, and were at the time of the
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prediction, so they don't count. I don't think a new war
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occurred during 1995.
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>>A new, as yet unknown disease will be discovered and many
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people will suffer its effects before a cure is found.
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I think this may have been the case. I recently saw a
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mention of an unknown hemorrhagic fever case on TV. Maybe
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it was later identified. New horse virus killed a bunch of
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horses and at least two people in Australia. Easily argued that
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the new disease is around but not in the news yet.
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>>The radical factions of the white minority in South Africa
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will create problems for the new government there. There
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will be a campaign of terror and violence that will not end
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before their leader is killed or jailed.
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As this conflicts with my prediction, it is obviously wrong.
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Although they did create problems, these have so far been
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fairly minor. No newsworthy campaign of terror and
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violence, as yet. No dead leader.
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>>A new cuisine will be introduced to the popular culture in
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America and it will become a common part of the diets of
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many Americans.
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I don't recall any new one. The last big new wave of
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cuisine was SE Asian, mainly Thai.
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The number of smokers in this country will decline over the
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next 20 years.
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Pretty safe, so far, on track.
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>>Ronald Reagan will be one of the next two former
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presidents to die. (It won't be my fault, by the way.)
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Pretty safe, but not yet. Unless you count brain death.
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>>Clinton will suffer even more scandals before the '96
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elections.
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Pretty safe, I guess there have been a few.
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>>A new, unsuspected environmental health hazard will be
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discovered and many Americans will be affected.
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Don't think so.
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[these go a little beyond the 1995 limit]
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[they are from Michael Haggerty]
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>>I predict that a famous world leader will have to step
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down from power before their time in the next 20 years.
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Italy, due to scandals; Poland: it could be said this was
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before Walesa's time. This one is a certainty. Famous
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world leaders step down all the time.
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>>There will be a great earthquake in Southern California
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that will be one of the worst disasters on record. Relief will
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arrive from all over the world. This will happen before the
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end of the 21st century.
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Still waiting, very likely to happen as is known by standard
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scientific methods.
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Some absolutely safe predictions:
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>>A natural disaster will kill thousands.
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Hurricanes and typhoons.
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>>Many governments will change hands.
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State and local elections. Many national elections around
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the world, another certainty.
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=========================================================
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The point of the predictions was to illustrate the entire
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dishonest prophecy business. If this were a sleazy tabloid,
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I would simply never have mentioned the incorrect
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predictions. I would have dug up the ones that were
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correct, and headlined them. When making the predictions I
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would intersperse (as we did) the specific with the vague.
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I would also use as many specific sounding ones, the kind
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that predict things that happen every year, as possible.
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The "change of governments," "many die in natural
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disasters," are great because such things happen every year
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without fail.
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Then I would drop all of the specific ones that didn't
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happen. For the specific ones that actually got lucky, I
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would really emphasize them, (both the Pope and Castro are
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old, they could easily have died) claiming that this is
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proof of clairvoyance. Hey, either one could keel over in
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the next two weeks and make us right. Even if either dies
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in 1996, I can claim I was close. Failing that, if heavily
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challenged, I claim that the Pope was supposed to die, but
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the prayers of the faithful averted destiny. The ones that
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sound specific, but aren't, (you predict 'natural disaster
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will kill many') are transformed into specific predictions:
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'devastation of Typhoon Angela predicted by psychic.' The
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actual prediction is buried inside the rag, if it is
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mentioned at all.
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=========================================================
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|| END OF ARTICLE ||
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=========================================================
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"To assert that the earth revolves around the sun is as
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erroneous as to claim that Jesus was not born of a virgin."
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[Cardinal Bellarmine 1615, during the trial of Galileo]
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===========================================================
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|| BEGINNING OF ARTICLE ||
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===========================================================
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The Pearly Gates, a Sketch by the Frantics
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St Peter: Next! Welcome to the Pearly Gates.
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Tom Hatton: Saint Peter!
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St Peter: Name?
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Tom Hatton: Tom. Tom Hatton.
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St Peter: Tom Hatton, the butcher?
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Tom Hatton: Yes.
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St Peter: Well, according to the celestial registry
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you've been a good man. You may enter the
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Kingdom of Heaven and live for eternity at
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God's side.
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Tom Hatton: Thank you. Thank God!
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St Peter: Enter and join your fellow Presbyterians.
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Tom Hatton: No, I'm Catholic.
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St Peter: Oh...well, then; go to Hell. Next!?
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Tom Hatton: But, you just said I could to to heaven.
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St Peter: Well, heaven is reserved for those who follow
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the one true path.
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Tom Hatton: Presbyterians?
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St Peter: Presbyterians.
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Tom Hatton: What about everybody else who lived
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faithfully by the tenants of their religion?
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St Peter: Tenets. And they blew it. Next?!
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Tom Hatton: No, wait a minute. I went to mass! I went
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to communion! I went to confession!
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St Peter: Waste of time! You might as well have stayed
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home Sunday mornings and watched Red Fisher.
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He's a good Presbyterian.
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Tom Hatton: The Jews claimed they were God's chosen
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People.
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St Peter: The Jews. That was years ago! God's fickle.
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Tom Hatton: Fickle?
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St Peter: Well, it was the Jews for a few thousand
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years, then it was the Muslims, 'cause he
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liked their hats. Then it was the Aztecs,
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then it was...oh, who are they? the men wear
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little skirts and poke dead animals with
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sticks, and wear carrots in their hair...
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Tom Hatton: Methodists!
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St Peter: Methodists!
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Tom Hatton: What about us Catholics.
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St Peter: Oh, God never liked Catholics.
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Tom Hatton: Oh
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St Peter: No no, as close as he got to Catholics was
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Anglicans. He thought they were a laugh and
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a half.
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Tom Hatton: Why?
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St Peter: Can you imagine? A religion breaks off from
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the Catholic Church...takes all the worst
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parts?
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Tom Hatton: So, anyone who isn't Presbyterian goes
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straight to hell?
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St Peter: Oh, no no no. Baptists go to purgatory.
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Tom Hatton: God likes Baptists.
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St Peter: No, he just likes getting their hopes up.
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Then when they figure they're in...whsshht,
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Yaaaaah! Every Friday at 3, it's a riot!
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Tom Hatton: That's awful.
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St Peter: That's God.
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Tom Hatton: So, I'm going to go to hell.
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St Peter: Don't worry, you can always get legal
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counsel, and appeal.
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Tom Hatton: There's lawyers in hell?
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St Peter: Where else would they be?
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Tom Hatton: Which way is it?
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St Peter: Out the same way you came. First door on the
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right. Next!? Name?
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Murray
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Weinbaum: Murray Weinbaum.
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St Peter: Religion?
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Murray: Presbyterian.
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St Peter: Enter the Kingdom of Heaven.
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Murray: Shalom!
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St Peter: Shalom! Wait a minute...wait a minute.
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The End.
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This is no doubt copyright material, and performing or
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otherwise reproducing this for profit would likely be
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illegal.
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It could be fun at your next atheistic humanist conspiracy
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meeting. It's short, only needs three people, and the only
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prop necessary is some suggestion of the Pearly Gates for
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Pete to stand in front of.
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=========================================================
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|| END OF ARTICLE ||
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=========================================================
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"John Wesley said that if you give up the witchcraft, you
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must give up the Bible. He is right. The choice is easy
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for me." [Rupert Hughes]
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===========================================================
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|| BEGINNING OF ARTICLE ||
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===========================================================
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BUDDHISM
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by: tmwe@maths.nott.ac.uk Tim Eyre
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Buddhism was invented in the 6th century BC by
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Siddhartha Gautama in India. He was brought up in
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luxury which he abandoned to seek enlightenment.
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During his search he was confronted by the signs
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of old age, sickness and death. He was desperate
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to find a means of enlightenment that would
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escape from these three weaknesses.
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Buddha is supposed to have achieved
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enlightenment while in deep meditation. He took
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the name "Buddha" which means "enlightened one".
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His 'realization' was that all life is suffering.
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No one can escape from sickness, death, old age
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or separation from those they love. He decided
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that all such suffering is caused by the physical
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desires of the body. To overcome this is to reach
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Nirvana, the complete freedom from the desires
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that cause suffering. Nirvana is supposed to be
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reached by following an `eightfold path' which
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involves 'realising' what the situation is,
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cultivating a mind free from negative emotions,
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being kind and engaging in meditation.
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The better one manages these steps, the higher
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up one is reincarnated. If one does it really
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well, one attains Nirvana. If one does it badly,
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one is reincarnated as a lower creature.
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So, there you have it, an outline of Buddhism.
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Some Buddhists are in fact atheists; the
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Theravada school of Bhuddism has no deity. They
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consider the attainment of Nirvana to be an
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individual pursuit, practised by monks and nuns.
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The other main school of Buddhism, the Mahayana
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school, deifies Buddha.
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What, then, is wrong with Buddhism? The
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Christian, Jewish and Islamic faiths all have
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large amounts of violence, immorality and general
|
|
bad behavior to answer for. As far as I am
|
|
aware, no holy wars have been fought for Buddha,
|
|
nor have major Buddhist inquisitions taken place.
|
|
It is worth noting, however, that Ghengis Khan's
|
|
Mongol hoards converted to Buddhism as they moved
|
|
through Asia. So it cannot be said that Buddhism
|
|
has a universal pacifying effect.
|
|
|
|
It seems that the most significant criticism of
|
|
Buddhism is that it is FALSE. Buddhism is
|
|
definitely a proselytising religion. It is
|
|
therefore guilty of filing peoples' heads with
|
|
nonsense. Why is it nonsense? For the sake of
|
|
being explicit I will mention just a few problems
|
|
that arise with the doctrine of reincarnation.
|
|
|
|
1. Why are there so many people around
|
|
nowadays? The world population is increasing
|
|
explosively. This would imply that animals are
|
|
behaving themselves and being reincarnated as
|
|
humans while fewer humans are being 'relegated'
|
|
to animal status. In the light of the atrocities
|
|
committed in the 20th Century, this seems
|
|
unlikely.
|
|
|
|
2. Particularly bad souls are supposed to be
|
|
reincarnated as lower animals. Is there a cut off
|
|
point in how low a soul can go? Are there animals
|
|
without souls? If amoebas are reincarnations, how
|
|
are they meant to make a conscious effort to do
|
|
better next time?
|
|
|
|
3. Where does evolution fit into this scheme?
|
|
The doctrine of 'reincarnation by merit' is so
|
|
blatantly incompatible with this somewhat
|
|
established scientific theory that any discussion
|
|
of the matter is superfluous.
|
|
|
|
4. Who administers the reincarnation scheme?
|
|
Who knows what who has done and what subsequent
|
|
status should be assigned? If it is
|
|
automatic, by what mechanism does it operate?
|
|
|
|
5. By what mechanism does a soul move from one
|
|
body to another? Does the soul take residence in
|
|
the fertilized egg? The zygote? The newborn
|
|
child? What evidence is there for the
|
|
existence of an actual 'soul' anyway?
|
|
|
|
6. In what sense is the soul that moved from
|
|
body A to body B the 'same' soul? Presumably it
|
|
has no physical presence, nor does it have any
|
|
recollection of the life in body A. Why, then, is
|
|
it the same soul?
|
|
|
|
|
|
It seems as if Heaven and Hell are quite
|
|
plausible constructs compared to reincarnation!
|
|
|
|
We are told that 'all life is suffering' is a
|
|
fundamental principle of Buddhism. Such a bleak
|
|
outlook! Plenty of people enjoy life; if life
|
|
was that bad, suicide rates would be
|
|
astronomical. Why not take a positive approach
|
|
and enjoy life?
|
|
|
|
Buddhism is not a violent religion. It does,
|
|
however, encourage and even require that its
|
|
adherents engage in meditation. It cannot be
|
|
denied that meditation in moderation is a
|
|
beneficial activity. However, if spending the
|
|
better part of one's waking hours staring at the
|
|
end of one's nose and chanting the same phrase
|
|
over and over again is not a pointless waste of
|
|
human life, I don't know what is. Even Mormons,
|
|
Hassidic Jews or Syrian terrorists can put their
|
|
lives to some useful purpose, real or imagined.
|
|
|
|
Buddhists are as guilty as any other religion
|
|
of hypocrisy. Consider the rank materialism of
|
|
the Thai people, the opulence of the Buddhist
|
|
temples of Borobudur on Java, Ankor Wat in
|
|
Cambodia or the still very active Kek Lok Si
|
|
temple in Malaysia. So much for transcending
|
|
materialism.
|
|
|
|
The idea that entertaining bodily desires
|
|
leads to sickness, old age and death is catchy,
|
|
but where is the causal connection? Perhaps the
|
|
rewards for abstinence only exist in Nirvana.
|
|
|
|
A final point is that the typical atheist
|
|
believes that some kind of 'Nirvana' will be
|
|
attained on dying anyway. Oblivion is certainly
|
|
a complete freedom from suffering and bodily
|
|
desires.
|
|
|
|
In conclusion, Buddhism may not cause as much
|
|
trouble as more dogmatic religions. It does,
|
|
however, waste lives, preach false propositions
|
|
and divert creative energies that could be better
|
|
spent elsewhere. No doubt a more thorough
|
|
investigation of Buddhist teachings would yield
|
|
still more absurdities and lies.
|
|
|
|
*******************************************************
|
|
Brief editorial comment.
|
|
|
|
When it counted, Buddhist monarchs were quite able to
|
|
reconcile their religion with their need to wage war and
|
|
maintain political control. Asoka reigned over large
|
|
portions of India in medieval times as a Buddhist,
|
|
conquering monarch.
|
|
|
|
On a global scale, the world changed from local religions
|
|
that had a social function in the community to monarchical
|
|
religions with a distant sky god and all rewards put off
|
|
until another life or another world.
|
|
|
|
This contrasts drastically with the pagan religions and
|
|
early Hinduism (as opposed to later Brahmanism), the early
|
|
religions distributed the results of a sacrifice to the
|
|
community, everybody got a share of the feast, the rich
|
|
donor received prestige and praise, the poor recipient got
|
|
an occasional chance at a decent meal.
|
|
|
|
Under christianity the redistributive feast is a shadow of
|
|
its former self, with the recipient receiving a mere cracker
|
|
and in some cases the priests drinking the wine themselves.
|
|
Buddhism also ended the redistributive sacrifice,
|
|
substituting only non-material blessings.
|
|
=========================================================
|
|
|| END OF ARTICLE ||
|
|
=========================================================
|
|
They were allowed to stay there on one condition, and that
|
|
is that they didn't eat of the tree of knowledge. That has
|
|
been the condition of the Christian church from then until
|
|
now. They haven't eaten as yet, as a rule they do not. --
|
|
Clarence Darrow
|
|
===========================================================
|
|
|| BEGINNING OF ARTICLE ||
|
|
===========================================================
|
|
Jokes compiled by Jim Dew
|
|
|
|
Here's a fun thing I've done that you freethinkers might
|
|
try: Go into a religious book store and ask them if they
|
|
have any books on how to tell real faith healers from fake
|
|
ones. You'll need to get them to agree that there are some
|
|
fake ones however. Then, you might ask them for their
|
|
personal advice. They'll probably tell you to pray about
|
|
it. Then you can ask them how they can know if it's god,
|
|
the devil, or themselves talking! Do the voices differ?
|
|
|
|
********************************
|
|
|
|
What's wrong with the logic in this Bible verse from Titus
|
|
(1:12): "...even a prophet of their own, said, The Cretians
|
|
are alway liars..."?
|
|
|
|
********************************
|
|
|
|
Many years ago, in his final sermon to the
|
|
congregation of the Wyoming Presbyterian Church in
|
|
Cincinnati, Ohio, Reverend Charlie Fredricks said "God is
|
|
like the square-root of negative two." In other words, God
|
|
is similar to this mathematical expression occasionally used
|
|
in engineering. What Reverend Fredricks didn't tell his
|
|
congregation is that mathematicians consider the square-root
|
|
of negative two to be "an irrational, imaginary number"!
|
|
Perhaps the analogy was more appropriate than intended!
|
|
|
|
********************************
|
|
|
|
"In Holy Writ there is no record of Jehovah ever having
|
|
laughed, although he certainly played many a grim joke on
|
|
his devotees. We are told that 'Jesus wept', but never that
|
|
he smiled." - Rationalist Society of St. Louis (1958)
|
|
|
|
********************************
|
|
|
|
Recently, the Democrats have suggested that a new
|
|
Congressional chaplain be hired because, they argue, we
|
|
don't need someone praying for the House and Senate, but
|
|
someone to start praying for the welfare of our country!
|
|
|
|
********************************
|
|
|
|
When a dead cowboy recently arrived at his eternal
|
|
home, he said to the angel at the gates, "Gee, I didn't know
|
|
Heaven would be so much like Texas." To which the angel
|
|
replied, "Heaven?!!"
|
|
|
|
********************************
|
|
|
|
You may be interested in the following "James Madison
|
|
quote" published twice in the Wisconsin State Journal (1/93
|
|
and 3/95), widely circulated in Christian fundamentalist
|
|
literature, and even cited in a book by Rush Limbaugh:
|
|
|
|
"We have staked the future of all our political
|
|
institutions upon the capacity of each and all of us to
|
|
govern ourselves according to the Ten Commandments of
|
|
God."
|
|
|
|
I tried for two years to track down its origin, from the
|
|
persons who cited it, from their sources, and by spending
|
|
weeks looking in the writings and speeches of Madison.
|
|
Although Madison was a devout Christian, he never made this
|
|
quote!
|
|
|
|
On March 28, 1995 I received a letter from Mark J.
|
|
Haynes of "WallBuilders, Inc." (P.O. Box 397, Aledo TX
|
|
76008) that produced the video "America's Godly Heritage"
|
|
which cites this quote. Haynes writes, "The truth is the
|
|
quote does not exist. We are in the process of eliminating
|
|
it from our materials." He suggests that "Someone, perhaps
|
|
a preacher, probably elaborated..." on the following
|
|
statement from the Federalist Papers: "...[we] rest all our
|
|
political experiments on the capacity of [hu]mankind for
|
|
self-government."
|
|
|
|
********************************
|
|
|
|
A fundamentalist wanting to buy a Parrot asked the pet
|
|
store owner for a bird that didn't talk dirty. The owner
|
|
said, "Have I got the bird for you. This parrot, as you can
|
|
see, has a string tied to each leg. Pull the string on his
|
|
right leg and he recites the Ten Commandments. Pull the
|
|
string on his left leg and he recites the Lord's Prayer."
|
|
"What happens if I pull both strings?" asked the
|
|
fundamentalist. To which the parrot replied, "I'd fall on
|
|
my ass, you damn fool!"
|
|
|
|
********************************
|
|
|
|
While rushing to the Cathedral, a young woman, late
|
|
for church, slipped on the stairs and fell back onto the
|
|
pavement. A woman coming out of the church, ran down to
|
|
help her to her feet.
|
|
|
|
"Oh!", replied late comer, "Is Mass out?!"
|
|
"No," replied the kind woman, "but the back is torn a bit."
|
|
|
|
********************************
|
|
|
|
A gay atheist decided to attend a Christian retreat
|
|
designed to change one's sexual orientation through prayer.
|
|
While there, participants were asked to say why they thought
|
|
they were gay. One avid fellow stood and said, "My mother
|
|
made me a homosexual."
|
|
|
|
Immediately the atheist jumped up and said, "Hey! Can she
|
|
make me one?!"
|
|
|
|
********************************
|
|
|
|
When the doctor informed me that for $350.00 he would
|
|
circumcise my son, I looked him straight in the eye and
|
|
said, "Hell! Let 'em wear it off like his old man had to!"
|
|
|
|
*****************************
|
|
|
|
Recently, Sally Jesse Raphael stated in an interview
|
|
to the National Enquirer that she does not believe in God.
|
|
True story! Thanks, Sally! (Like anyone's going to believe
|
|
her!) Well, at least it's a start to making atheists more
|
|
visible.
|
|
I also heard that at a recent fund raiser, Sally sat
|
|
between a celebrated Bishop and a distinguished Rabbi. She
|
|
told them, "I feel as if I were a leaf between the Old and
|
|
New Testaments."
|
|
The rabbi replied, "That page is usually blank!"
|
|
|
|
*****************************
|
|
|
|
Recently, after preaching that there are 726 different
|
|
sins, James Kennedy was flooded by requests for the list
|
|
from people thinking they were missing out on something.
|
|
|
|
*****************************
|
|
|
|
God was getting concerned about the decline of
|
|
humankind, so he called in Jesus and said, "My Son, I would
|
|
like you to return to earth and help those poor sinners."
|
|
Jesus replied, "Are you kidding, Father, last time they
|
|
hung me on a cross! Why don't you go?"
|
|
God said, "Well, I'll just loose my temper and end up
|
|
wiping them all out." So God called in the Holy Ghost and
|
|
said, "Neither Jesus nor I are able to go to earth to help
|
|
the poor sinners, we would like you to go."
|
|
To which the Holy Ghost replied, "Are you kidding?
|
|
They haven't stopped talking about the last time I fucked
|
|
around down there!"
|
|
|
|
|
|
=========================================================
|
|
|| END OF ARTICLE ||
|
|
=========================================================
|
|
The Santa myth is one of the most effective means ever
|
|
devised for intimidating children, eroding their self-
|
|
esteem, twisting their behavior, warping their values, and
|
|
slowing their development of critical thinking skills.
|
|
--Tom Flynn, _The Trouble with Christmas_
|
|
===========================================================
|
|
|| BEGINNING OF ARTICLE ||
|
|
===========================================================
|
|
That holiday
|
|
|
|
Isn't it nice to receive the December issue of a magazine
|
|
that has no mention of that holiday in it?
|
|
|
|
Happy Saturnalia, Joyous LastWeek, see you next year
|
|
=========================================================
|
|
|| END OF ARTICLE ||
|
|
=========================================================
|
|
Philosophy is questions that may never be answered.
|
|
Religion is answers that may never be questioned.
|
|
==========================================================
|
|
|| END OF TEXTS ||
|
|
==========================================================
|
|
Atheism is the world of reality, it is reason, it is
|
|
freedom, Atheism is human concern, and intellectual honesty
|
|
to a degree that the religious mind cannot begin to
|
|
understand. And yet it is more than this. Atheism is not an
|
|
old religion, it is not a new and coming religion, in fact
|
|
it is not, and never has been, a religion at all. The
|
|
definition of Atheism is magnificent in its simplicity:
|
|
Atheism is merely the bed-rock of sanity in a world of
|
|
madness.
|
|
ATHEISM: An Affirmative View, by Emmett F. Fields
|
|
(_)(_)(_)(_)(_)(_)(_)(_)(_)(_)(_)(_)(_)(_)(_)(_)(_)(_)(_)
|
|
The person in charge of our complain department is Helen
|
|
Teller. If you have a complaint go to Helen Teller.
|
|
(_)(_)(_)(_)(_)(_)(_)(_)(_)(_)(_)(_)(_)(_)(_)(_)(_)(_)(_)
|
|
=><====><====><====><====><====><====><====><====><====><==
|
|
|| Begging portion of the Zine ||
|
|
==><====><====><====><====><====><====><====><====><====><==
|
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There is no charge for receiving this, and there is no
|
|
charge for distributing copies to any electronic medium.
|
|
Nor is there a restriction on printing a copy for use in
|
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discussion. You may not charge to do so, and you may not do
|
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so without attributing it to the proper author and source.
|
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|
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If you would like to support our efforts, and help us
|
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acquire better equipment to bring you more and better
|
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articles, you may send money to Greg Erwin at: 100,
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Terrasse Eardley / Aylmer, Qc / J9H 6B5 / CANADA. Or buy
|
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our atheist quote address labels, and other fine products,
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see "Shameless advertising and crass commercialism" below.
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Articles will be welcomed and very likely used IF:
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(
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they are emailed to:
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((ai815@FreeNet.Carleton.CA; or,
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godfree@magi.com), or
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sent on diskette to me at the above Aylmer address in
|
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any format that an IBM copy of WordPerfect can read;
|
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) and
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they don't require huge amounts of editing; and
|
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I like them.
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|
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I will gladly reprint articles from your magazine, local
|
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group's newsletter, or original material. There are
|
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currently about 140 subscribers, plus each issue is posted
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in some newsgroups and is archived as noted elsewhere.
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If you wish to receive a subscription, email a simple
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We will automate this process as soon as we know how.
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Yes, please DO make copies! (*)
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Please DO send copies of The Nullifidian to anyone who might
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The only limitations are:
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At least clearly indicate the source, and how to subscribe.
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You do NOT have permission to copy this document for
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commercial purposes.
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|
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The contents of this document are copyright (c) 1995, Greg
|
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Erwin (insofar as possible) and are on deposit at the
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National Library of Canada
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|
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You may find back issues in any place that archives
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alt.atheism. Currently, all back issues are posted at
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the Humanist Association of Ottawa's area on the National
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Capital Freenet. telnet to 134.117.1.22, and enter <go
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ARCHIVES
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For America On-Line subscribers:
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To access the Freethought Forum on America Online enter
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keyword "Capital", scroll down until you find Freethought
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Forum, double click and you're there. Double click "Files &
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And thanks to the people at the _Truth Seeker_, who edited,
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Shameless advertising and crass commercialism:
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\_/=\/=\_/=\/=\_/=\/=\_/=\/=\_/=\/=\_/=\/=\_/=\/=\_/=\/=\_/
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Atheistic self-stick Avery(tm) address labels. Consisting
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of 210 different quotes, 30 per page, each label 2 5/8" x
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_________________________________________________
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|"Reality is that which, when you stop believing |/\
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|in it, doesn't go away." [Philip K. Dick] | |
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|Greg Erwin 100 Terrasse Eardley | 1"
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|Aylmer, Qc J9H 6B5 Canada | |
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| email: ai815@FreeNet.Carleton.CA | |
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|________________________________________________|\/
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_________________________________________________
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|"...and when you tell me that your deity made |
|
|
|you in his own image, I reply that he must be |
|
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|very ugly." [Victor Hugo, writing to clergy] |
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|Greg Erwin 100 Terrasse Eardley |
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|
|Aylmer, Qc J9H 6B5 Canada Ph: (613) 954-6128 |
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| email: ai815@FreeNet.Carleton.CA |
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|________________________________________________|
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Other quotes in between the articles are usually part of the
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add $2 postage/handling for first book & 0.50 for each
|
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additional book. (All prices US$)
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Send 2 first class stamps for H.H. Waldo's current catalog.
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(Use international reply coupon, or get hold of US Stamps)
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TO:
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H.H Waldo, Bookseller
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P.O. Box 350
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Rockton, IL 61072
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or phone 1-800-66WALDO !!!
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tell 'im: "that nullifidian guy sent me!"
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Once again: ISSN: 1201-0111 The Nullifidian Volume Two,
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Number 8: AUGUST 1995.
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=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-
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The problem with religions that have all the answers is that
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they don't let you ask the questions.
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=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-
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Last of all, you can now find me at:
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http://infoweb.magi.com/~godfree/
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(*) There is no footnote, and certainly not an endnote.
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--
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|\ ( ) ) /- / godfree | ai815
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| \ | / / . _/_ . __ / . __ __ @magi.com | @Freenet.
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| \ | / / / / ) / ) / / ) __ ) / ) Greg | Carleton.
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) \| (__(__(___(__(__(___(__(__(__(__(__(__/ (__ Erwin | ca
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