107 lines
5.8 KiB
Plaintext
107 lines
5.8 KiB
Plaintext
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Åe%Å Õ0r3C4zÅER5
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(TeXT FoReCaSTeRS 4 U NoN-/<R4D D0o|>z!)
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PRouDLeY PReZ3NÅS!
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T0P1o wA'z 2 GiT a SÅR4iGôŠ|>00|> To d0 Da NaZ-T WiT CHš!
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(c)oPyRoNG 199S! BY(Se%£4L): GoDD [TúF]
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HeY0HoW-D /<-R4D D()0Ds! WoW tHiZ iZ thA (capslock!!!!) K00LeST D00D HeRe!
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úù-=[ GoDD ]=-ùú
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WiT THa SPeCiAL-ED (HeY 1 WaZ iN SPeC-E|> aT SCHo01!) oF THa K-C00L-AiD
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MaGaZYnE C4L'D Åe%Å f0R3C4zÅER5 4gIN! DiS iZ Da Se<oNd R3LEaSe aND tHiZ
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YeAR'z SPeCiAL-EDiTi0N. heHA k!? yAH! oK HErE iZ dA Co0L3SÅ TxT e\/eR
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CoMMiN' Up! "I LiK iT LiK3 dAÅ!" - I f0rGit WHo DiS Qu0Åe FRo/\/\!? AcK!
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oK! UnPHoRTuN8Ly, MoZt oF U kAn'T ReAd /<-R4D sO PHuCKT U aLL aND GiT a
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LifE aNd Le4nre 2 TyPe Da GooD SHiT LiK3 mE!!!!!!!
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T0P1o wA'z 2 GiT a SÅR8 |>00|> To d0 Da NaZ-T WiT CHš!
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-=( 1 ]ùú GiT HiM (SÅR4iGHÅ |>00|>) 2 CuM o\/eR! TeLL HiM YoU'rE NoT a
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LiF3lEsZ L0oZ3R aN|> YoU'Re HaVn' A /<-/<00L PaR=T! WiT LoTz
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oF CHiC/<s! (Wit BiG TiTiES!) AnD TeLL HiM He BeTTeR HuRRy Up
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Be-4 DeY GiTT heR3! Den, When He' GiÅz DaR3, U GiVe HiM@ eNuFF
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1o() % PR0oPH Bo()z3! AnD d3N! Just Go PuT oN Da MaK3-Up aN'd
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Da DrUN/< FuKC3r WoN't KnOW da DIfferENse! PaCK DaT FuDgE!
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-=( 2 ]ùú D00 Da SaME TinG WiT Da PaR=T SheeIT! BuT INsT34d oV GiT'n iM
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hAMm3ReD, HiT iM WiT a HaMM3r! DeN RiD3 Da HurSHeY Hi-WaY!!!
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-=( 3 ]ùú T3eL iM DaT U 1 dah L0Å0 aND WaNÅ t0 PaY iM $1,000,000 t0 sUk
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iM wHaRe DuH sUn DoN'Å ShIN3! DeN WhEn YoU'Re ReD-D, U tI3 iM
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2 dA BeD s0 He DoN'Å bEAÅ dA LiViN' SHiT OuT o You! iV hE wAz
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GoNNa Do ThAt WiT hIS C0Ck, iT'd B FuN, BuT hE's GoNNa WaNNa
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KiLL-U! So RuN aWaY To SuCk-4-C0cK 4'NoÅHeR D'A!
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-=( 4 ]ùú DiS iZn'Å tO GiT a SÅr4iGHÅ Do0d BuT iT's FuN to!, G0 iN'2 yEr
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fAv0R1Te GaY-B4R aND StAR'T SiNG'N "R4P3 M3!, R4Pe! M3 M'eye
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Fr31nD!" aN' YoU'lL HaV3 A /<-R4D TyME! An' iV yEr' LuCKy!
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LiK3 Me DaDDy WaZ, Yoo GeT ThROwN InTO Da StATe PenA10tURy!
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aNd GiT 2 DOO TyM3 Dr0pIN'g dA SoAP!!!! "O0P's, Oh yes! yes!"
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DiZ 4Ls0 iS D4 qUiK'eSÅ 4NuS EnL4rG'M3NÅ AR0uND!!!!!
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-=( 5 ]ùú TRiCkED iM iN 2 TiNK'n YaR a GiRL'y! (ShOOd't HaVE AnY Tr0Ble
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0V'eR Da F0N3 iF U SoUN'd N-E tHInG LieK Me!) AnD TeL'iM YoU
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Com'N OvEr f0R A Go0D PHuCK! JuST TeLL iM, H3 CaN D0 aN3TiNG
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aNd YoU PLaY A Me3N SKiN FLo0Åe! BuT oNLy iF Da LiGHTz R OuT!
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-=( 6 ]ùú PR33TeND YoU'Re' NeAL anD BoB! aN'D MaKe iT iN YeR Dr34MS!
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WaRN1Ng 2 DaH WaNNa"B"GoDD! : THiZ MaK3S a MeZS oV yEr ShEE3Tz!
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-=( 7 ]ùú DeR iZ N0 NuMer0 SePT! (EnGLiSH: ThErE iZ N0 NuMBeR SeV3N!!!)
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s0 dAt M43ANs D4Å U MuST hAB dA Wr0Ng NuMbA anD iT AiNÅ LuCKy!
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wE'LL aTl34sÅ U w0N't GeT lUCkY WiT NuMBa SeV3N!!!! s0 TrY
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aNoTHeR /<-R4D Nuú\\Ba!!!!!! aNd HaB YeR <0NdoMs ReD-D!!!!!
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-=( 8 ]ùú DiS 1 iZ PR0BaBlY Da HaRDeST, (LiE/< My FRuIÅY FL00Ty!) OnE oV
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DeM 4LL!!!!!! WHaT YoU HaV'2 d0 iZ LeVe' Im a MeSS4gE oN iZ VMB
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(All /<-C00L SÅR4iGHÅ d00D's HaV3 dA V0lC3 M4L3 B0%35!!!!!)
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AnD Da MeSSaGe MuST CoNT'aiN PoSÅ-PR3/HypN0Ti< SuGGesTi0Nz tA
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CaLL u FoR Da RiD3 oV HiS LiPHe! TeLL iM YaR NamMe iZ SteVe ANd
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He'll SoAk iZ pAnTz iN DaH CrOTCH ArE4 WiT CuM! He' ThInk's YeR
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a GiRl By tHe S0uND of YeR V01c3, s0 aS So0N'a y0u GiT dEr, PuT
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YeR LiPz 4R0UNd iZ P3NiZ anD M4Ke Im eNjOy' iT aZ MuCH aS U D0!
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-=( 9 ]ùú GiT YaR HaND's 0N a iSSuE oV tHaT MaGiZyNE 4LL uZ /<-R4D Do0Dz
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|)iSpIZe aN|> H4Å3!!!! "PlAyBoy!", and GiT a U-HUH GlU StiCK!
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GlU dA DiSGuSTinG PiCKTureS tO yA anD He "MigHT;' MiSTaKE yOU
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F0R a HoT-BuStY cHIck LieK dA uuGly 976 Wh0rEz! (ew!) bUt HeY!
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iV iT GiTS YoU S0M3, DaN it's WoRTH iT! YoU CaN Re4D YaR OwN
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PlAyGiRLs MaGiZYne'Z AfTeR Ya Do DuH N4ZÅY wIt Da SÅR8 Do0D!
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-=(10 ]ùú iV U R r34d'N DiZ SÅiLL, U R mUsT HaB a BiG HaRD Dic/<!, so
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t4kE 5 2 sP4nK iT (GoD (Da OtHeR 1!) NoEs i HaV3 l0Ts 0v TiM3S
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wHiLE RiGHT'N DiZ K-RAD/Co0L-eLiT3-PhAth3rPhUCk'n-Te%Å-FilE!!)
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r3AL G0oD aN'D CuM Re4L HaR|> 0N yeR KeYBoARd fEr m3!!! 0Oh yeS!
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0 WoW! ... dAt wAZ FuNN!! oK NoW tHe LaZT WaY tO GiT a STr4iGHT
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D0oD's C0Ck In' YoU'r3 Azz and Mouth (In' DaT OrDeR iZ BeST!!!)
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U haV 2 KiDnApp HiS SiSteR aND FaMiL33! AnD LoCK eM' iN ummm,
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dA CloS3Å oR B4THr00M oR oTher RooM!.. and teLL iM, dAt if hE
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d0N't d0 y0u RiGhT, y0U'lL KiLL deM 0N3 Bi 1 UntIL hE doES!!!
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MaKe' SuRe YoU d0n't d0 DiZ UnL3sz YoU' l00K lIEk daT dood ...
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aRN01D SwARtzNIggER! CuZ WhEn'S I tRI'ed it, DeY AlL BeaT mE
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uP cUz I l00K lieK aRNoLD dA gUy (oH dAt SeXy B0D!) oN Da TV
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ShOW Ca1L'd Da WoNDeR YeARz! BuTT Da'Ts oK, cUZ StR8 GuI's
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ArN'Å Az Mu<H PhUNN iN dA SaC, aN'd dOn'T eN-JoY LiCK'n
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SaC liKe aLL mY /<=RaD MeMb3Rs of Å3%Å f0r3<45Å3eS!!!!!
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MoZT 0V DeeZ WeRk GR8! I uSe DeM 41l DuH TyM3! N-E WaYS! Re3MeMB'R D0oDz!
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"If Se% iZ a PaiN iN D'a aZZ, YeR Do0'n iT rIÅ3!" -GoDD [TúF]
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If U hAV NE Go0D GAY! GiF oR JPG filez, PLeAZE!!!! UPl04D eM tO dA TF WHQ!!!
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