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85 lines
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[ Mind Warp - Volume #1, Issue #6, File #017 ]
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[ "What the Crime Bill SHOULD Read:" by Raven ]
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------------------------------------------------------------------------------
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What the Crime Bill SHOULD Read:
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[Raven/MG]
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I was watching the House debate the "crime bill" the other day on
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CNBC. I have now thought a whole lot about this, and I feel that that bill
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should be scrapped because 1) they are approaching the subject wrongly, and
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2) it's gonna cost $30,000,000,000 which could be lowered to $5,000,000,000
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and the rest could be used to give WORKING americans a tax break. :) Here's
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my bill:
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The original "crime bill" was a good idea, but the people who drafted
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that one are idiots. Crime can never be stopped, there will always be crime.
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The problem with today is that there's too much VIOLENT crime. Violence is
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the only difference from now and 20 years ago.
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There are several things we could do to limit violent crimes. While
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banning assault weapons seems like a good idea (since they have no use other
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than to kill people) we need to do more.
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We first must find out where the problem is coming from in order to
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create a solution. If one sits down and thinks about it, all the violent
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crimes generally come from these little brats with too much time on their
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hands, and no respect for anyone/thing. This "unorganized crime" has been
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degenerating our society for a while now. To remedy this, we need to re-
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establish the mafia. Yes, societies are utterly helpless without organized
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crime.
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We should use about $5 billion to give to the mafia to help them
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recruit new families into the buisness. (We can give the money to Mario
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Cuomo, he'll know who to give it to.) The Federal, and State governments
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will temporarily fund the Mafia until it gets onto it's feet, and then the
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mafia will be able to fund the government.
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Once the mafia has been given this money, they can divide it between
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a proposed three(3) factions. With three(3) major crime families (each
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situated in different parts of the country: North East, South East, and West)
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at first working together, and later fighting against each other, America
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will be much safer. The mafia families will have explicit orders to be sure
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to eliminate any criminals they find using guns, who are not in their family,
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thus eliminating any disorganized crime left in america.
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The mafia will then put more of their own into public office. With
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most of the country's political leaders backed by the mob, things such as red
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light districts can be legalized. The Mob will then control all sorts of
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crime such as: gambling, prostitution (very strict health control codes will
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also be put into affect), drugs, And they will also be able to back
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legitimate businesses.
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Also, the new mob will be integrated. Entrance into the mafia will
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be limited only by your mental abilities, or your physical strength. New
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entrants will start off as pick-pockets. This will help america re-develop
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some courtesy towards others (no one will be rude and bump into other people
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for fear of being pick-pocketed, or fear of being called a pick-pocket). Once
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the new recruits have proven themselves worthy by being a loyal pickpocket,
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they can be promoted, and carry out bigger crimes.
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With the help of the US military forces, the mob will go to south
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america, find the drug harvesting/producing operations, monitor them for a
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couple of days, and then kill everyone there, only to take it over for them-
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selves.
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The Mafia will now control three major industries. With the sales of
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drugs (much cheaper in america, and quite expensive abroad), prostitution,
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and gambling, the mob can "donate" money to the country, thus lowering taxes
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on americans. They will control the drug market, and other countries will
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bow to us. We will once again become the world leader in everything.
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Therefore, the answer to crime is not the prevention of it, for crime
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cannot ever be fully eliminated, but the regulation of it.
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I scare myself when I write conservative crap like that, sometimes.
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Oh well..
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==============================================================================
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Call Arsonist's Arsenal BBS the Mind Warp WHQ - (301) 208-0847
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==============================================================================
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