99 lines
5.8 KiB
Plaintext
99 lines
5.8 KiB
Plaintext
Û Û [MiLK] Û Û
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Û Û Û Û
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Û Û Mighty Issue #2 Û Û
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Û²²²²²²²²²Û Liquid "Warez boards can be fun" Û²²²²²²²²²Û
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Û²²²²²²²²²Û illicit By James Hetfield Û²²²²²²²²²Û
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Û²²²²²²²²²Û Kollections Û²²²²²²²²²Û
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Û²²²²²²²²²Û Û²²²²²²²²²Û
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ÛÛÛÛÛÛÛÛÛÛÛ ÛÛÛÛÛÛÛÛÛÛÛ
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The young boy flips on his modem, looks down his CBBS listing for a
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random number he hasn't tried yet that is in his area code, fluently types in
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"atdt" and the number, and watches the modem do its magic. The boy sighs as
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the message "CONNECT 14400" appears on the screen. He watches a 10-page Ansi
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dance its way across the screen. At the logon prompt, he types in the word
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"NEW". He gasps in horror as the screen displays the cryptic message
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"New User Password:".
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The boy calls around to all the BBSes he's already on, frantically
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searching for the New User Password of the "Really Neat BBS". Finally, he
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discovers it. He calls back and fills out the new user information, only
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noticing one this out of the ordinary, one of the questions being "are you
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a FED?". Now the true horror comes. He finishes his New user information,
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and a New user Infoform pops up. A lot of boards use new user infoforms, not
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a big deal, right? Wrong. This is no ordinary infoform. The questions on it
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would disgust even the most strong of stomachs. "What are your 3 newest
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consoles?". "What does iCE stand for?" "Do you pirate software?" the
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list goes on and on.
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Sound familiar? An Experience most of us have probably encountered
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many a times in our lives. Yet most of us do nothing about it, just never
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call the boards back, living our lives the same as if it never happened.
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Well look how much that has done for the Cyberspace we live in! The Warez
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board has grown from a minority to a majority in less than a year. The simple
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message board has nearly disappeared from existence. The only boards these
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days with active message bases are either filled with horribly long ANSi's
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promoting Warez boards, or Blabber about the newest version of d00m Out.
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The few actually worthwhile users of BBSes are being driven away from the
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scene by the massive inflation of 3l1t3n3ss in our realm.
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Something Must be done.
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"But What Can I Do, I'm just a simple BBSer!" you exclaim.
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Well, there are many things, really. You could Crash The Warez
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Boards, but that's real messy and tends to get you in trouble in the long run
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<if you get caught, that is>. You could Kill the Warez Sysops, but that too
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ends up quite messy. You could do nothing and let the problem multiply until
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you're the only non-3l1t3 BBSer in the state.
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There is another way, however.
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Most Sysops run boards for enjoyment. Most like the message bases
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and want to watch them prosper, and the file bases are not as big of a deal.
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However, most feel that the file bases are needed to keep the activity on
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their board high. So post a message. Post a LOT of messages. Post things
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like "So I hear the Pacific Ocean is mighty rough these days.. maybe Cthulhu
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is rising?". Or another great Message getter is "Yeah, I believe that the
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income taxes are a great benefit to the human race as a whole!". If everyone
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on the board isn't too Warezized yet, Someone eventually will reply "What the
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hell are you talking about?". Then, you can get a conversation going. Maybe
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even a Normal conversation that doesn't mention 0-3 days in it anywhere.
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Perhaps you can even continue this conversation and even get a few more
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Warezites talking. Yes, Warezites Talking about something not file related.
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It is possible. If you plan it right, a Chain Reaction can occur and bring
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a twist to the common Warez board. Now, if that idea fails, which in reality
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it probably will, because the common Warez geek will reply <if at all>
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something in the lines of "Whatever Dude. Hey anybody got that new CoNSoLE
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Little People's Farm?" and bring the subject back to the file section, the
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next option for You is to u/l fake files. This always causes a stir that
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usually ends up sending people to the message bases complaining, and you
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can have the opportunity to start up normal conversation. When I say
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fake files I mean something along the lines of a .exe file that displays
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a Text file "you fucking Warez Geek!" and comes with 2 or 3 megs of useless
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.dat Files. The common sysop doesn't even look at the warez u/l'd to him, so
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this process might get you somewhere. I suggest that you do this under a
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back-up account, just in case the sysop gets a tad annoyed and deletes you.
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If these fail, you can always try becoming good friends with the sysop
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and going to his house one day and accidentally editing his board to your
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liking. a good band-aid form of reform. And, if all else fails, you can
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choke the little fucker by shoving Spam down his throat until he bleeds
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internally. Yes, there ARE uses for Spam. I'd Love to hear more ways to foil
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the warez atmosphere on BBSes! please leave me mail with YOUR ideas on how to
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destroy the common Warez Board.
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¯¯¯¯¯¯¯¯¯¯¯¯¯¯¯¯¯¯¯¯¯¯¯¯¯¯¯¯¯¯[MiLK] Information®®®®®®®®®®®®®®®®®®®®®®®®®®®®®
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[MiLK] Sights - The Obloid Sphere (708)965-3098
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[MiLK] Member Listing - James Hetfield
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Nyarlathotep
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[MiLK] Issue Number - 2
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[MiLK] Issue Size - 5905 Bytes
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[MiLK] Date of Production: 12/27/93
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¯¯¯¯¯¯¯¯¯¯¯¯¯¯¯¯¯¯¯¯¯¯ Happy people are Ignorant People ®®®®®®®®®®®®®®®®®®®®®
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