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Pointy Issue-Pointy Issue-Pointy Issue-Pointy Issue-Pointy Issue-Pointy Issue
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_ /\ _ _ /\ _
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/ \_/\_/ \_/\_/ \ M M 0000 0000 SSSSS EEEEEEE / \_/\_/ \_/\_/ \
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\_____/ () \_____/ MM MM 0 //0 0 //0 S E \_____/ () \_____/
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/ \ M M M M 0 // 0 0 // 0 SSSS EEEEE / \
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/ \__/ \ M M M 0// 0 0// 0 S E / \__/ \
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/__________\ M M 0000 0000 SSSSS EEEEEEE /__________\
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DDDD RRRR OOOO PPPPP PPPPP IIIII N N GGGGG SSSSS
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D D R R O O P P P P I NN N G S
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D D RRRR O O PPPPP PPPPP I N N N G GGG SSSS
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D D R R O O P P I N NN G G S
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DDDD R R OOOO P P IIIII N N GGGG SSSSS
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A-M00SE-ING ANECDOTES AND ILLUMINATION BY AND FOR THE PAWNS OF THE
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M00SE ILLUMINATI
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Issue #32| Disclaimer: The Editors will place almost anything in |Nov.10 , 1989
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---------- this newsletter out of a frantic desire to fill the --------------
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issue, so don't blame them for the quality or content of the submissions. Except
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-ing those they may have written themselves, the enclosed items do not in any
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way represent the Editors' fnord opinions. In fact, let's be real safe, and say
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that as far as this newsletter is concerned, they have no opinions at all. OK?
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================================================================================
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************************************* STAFF ************************************
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Editor - Patrick Salsbury <V291NHTP@UBVMS.BITNET>
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Submissions to: DangerM00se <V291NHTP@UBVMS.BITNET>
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Back issue requests: WarM00se <V291NHTP@UBVMS.BITNET>
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M00se List updates and changes: Darkling M00se <V123NKUX@UBVMS.BITNET>
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(This space to let): Contact <V291NHTP@UBVMS.BITNET>
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**************************** EDITORIALS AND LETTERS ****************************
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Woof Woof Woof! Hello! My name is Raggs! (If you don't understand that, see
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"Sleeper", by Woody Allen (c) 1972 or -3)
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Yes, it's another one of those damned...uh...I mean...WUNNERFUL issues
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of M00se Droppings come to clutter up your mailboxes and directories!
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As to the "Pointyness" of this issue...I was just browsing through issue
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23 of M.D. this morning, and I stumbled across the Steve Martin poem, "The
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Pointy Birds."
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The Pointy Birds are pointy, pointy.
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They annoint my head, annointy, 'nointy.
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I thought this was AMAZINGLY funny, and thought I should re-share it
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with all of you.
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-Pat
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- - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - -
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(Submitted by BrandyM00se)
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A SMILE costs nothing, but gives much. It enriches those who receive,
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without making poorer those who give. it takes but a moment, but the
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memory of it sometimes lasts forever. None is so rich or mighty that
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he can get along without it, and none is so poor but that he can be made
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rich by it. A smile creates happiness in the home, fosters good will
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in business, and is the countersign of friendship. It brings rest to the
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weary, cheer to the discouraged, sunshine to the sad, and it is nature's
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best antidote for trouble. Yet it cannot be bought, begged, borrowed, or
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stolen, for it is something that is of no value to anyone until it is given
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away. Some people are too tired to give you a smile. Give them one of
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yours, as none needs a smile so much as he who has no more to give.
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- author unknown to me.
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0 0
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>
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\_/
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- - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - -
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Imagine you are a poor seafaring lobster who can't quite afford to
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book passage aboard the Queen Mary (is that still running???). So, quite
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naturally (literally quite naturally), you begin to swim from point a to
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point b, both point a and point b being basically water somewhere, which
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looks like water everywhere, except for water at toxic waste sites, or
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somesuch. Anyhow, as you relax, working out, doing the backstroke, you
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realize that there is a vast net around you. Suddenly you are pulled into
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a boat very unlike the Queen Mary, and soon find yourself on ice. In
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handcuffs. Upon waking up, you learn that you are either still in handcuffs,
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or else you are suddenly performing Houdini's last trick.
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Where to from there????? At last we find out. Some 200+ lb. woman who
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speaks no decipherable language(at least not decipherable to lobsters)decides
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you'd look better in her home than in a store. She neglects to mention that
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the invitation to dinner involves you as the main course. you realize that
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when she holds you over her cauldron of boiling water and threatens to
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make you into a chameleon: you will turn a very unnatural shade of red.
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Well, now is the time to stop this torture of poor harmless sea
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creatures! join the Lobster Liberation League (LLL)! Now! That's right!
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what could be a more joyful sight than 30 lobsters trotting happily out
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the automatic doors of your local supermarket? Hobbling out the doors of
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your local fish markets(is that the right word???), claw in claw,
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crying "free at last!", or at least its nearest lobsterian equivalent.
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The time for action is NOW!!!!
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brought to you by the LLL
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goodbye and hello as always,
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valerie (aka vam00se)
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******************************* EVENTS AND NEWS ********************************
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Bill Dickson and I were discussing having a Mega-Thr0ng-A-Thon sometime soon.
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I've found a particularly good place for it. (You're not going to beleive this!)
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BIG M00SE, NY!!!!!!!!!
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(And better yet!) Population: ***6***
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- - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - -
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Hey, Bill! What's the news on those M.I. T-shirts? Send me some info, and I'll
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post it.....
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- - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - -
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[I believe this is from Bill Dickson, but I'm not sure.....-Pat]
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Hi there! It's the Pompous Critic once again, telling you who and what to like
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if you want to be a hip art snob. Remember, if I don't say it's good, it's
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not, no matter how much you like it!
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Today I'm going to review the David Byrne concert that took place at the Palace
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Theatre in New Haven, CT on November 4. Byrne, as those of you with brains
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instead of squid in your heads will know, is the singer and songwriter for
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Talking Heads. He has a new solo album out, with a latin feel to it --
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inspired by the song "Mr. Jones," which was on the last Heads album, _Naked_.
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Byrne isn't alone on this tour. Your Pompous Critic counted fourteen people on
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the stage at one time, including seven men playing brass instruments of one
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kind or another, four percussionists, a keyboardist, a female backup singer
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(who sang a couple of songs herself as well), and Byrne. The guys on the horns
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took turns playing a spare keyboard, playing some spare percussion, dancing,
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and singing backup as well.
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The concert basically consisted of the songs on Byrne's new album, _Rei_Momo_,
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plus "Mr. Jones" and a song from the Jonathon Demme film, _Something_Wild_.
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That song is one of the extra tracks on the Compact Disc version of the album.
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In addition, for the second encore, Byrne played "Papa Legba" from his own
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film, _True_Stories_.
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The band looked great. They were all in solid white, they were all enjoying
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themselves immensely, and they were all *moving*, whenever they didn't have to
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stand still to play. The seven guys in back had choreographed little movements
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to each song, and were obviously having a ball. Byrne, even though he looks
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like Norman Bates and sweats like a pig, could get an award for the Person Who
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Enjoys Himself The Most On Stage. He was constantly dancing around, by himself
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or with his backup singer. He suggested we all dance as well, with the warning
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that "state regulations require that the aisles be kept clear, but there's no
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aisles in the middle." The energy they put out to the audience was wonderful.
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So how was the music? Well, let me put it this way:
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There were only two flaws with the entire concert. The first, more mild one
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was when Byrne fumbled a drum he was picking up and had to chase it a bit,
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causing him to get back to the microphone in the middle of a line he was
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supposed to be singing. He was clearly disturbed by this, but the audience
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forgave him instantly, and he relaxed again.
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The second was that there *was* no room to dance. The music was so
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entertaining, so successfully performed that it was impossible to sit still.
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Even the older fogies I saw were moving around, and many of the Yalies were
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doing their best to dance in the four inches they had between their own seats
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and the seats in front of them. "Mr. Jones" in particular, good as it was,
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would have been infinitely better in an outdoor theatre with a green for
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everybody to dance on. It was a bit frustrating, getting all that energy from
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Byrne and his band, and not having much outlet for it.
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All in all, it was well worth the money. It was even worth the money that
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Jethro Tull, four days before, wasn't worth; so I kind of felt as if New Haven
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had made it up to me. Byrne was friendly, unpretentious, and entirely
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entertaining. The Pompous Critic says "go see it or be hopelessly crass and
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inadequately tasteful."
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***************************** FICTION AND POETRY *******************************
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The Armadillo -- Chapter Two
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by Lord Trelf
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As you remember, the dame was just about to tell The Armadillo why she
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needed help when an explosion ripped through the room. The concussive blast
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came from the direction of the window behind The Armadillo, pushing him
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forward and onto the dame, knocking her to the floor. The fact that he
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landed on top of her [after all, what good flatfoot wouldn't be on top
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of...oh never mind] and the sheer invulnerability of his Armadillo Armor
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was what saved them both.
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As the smoke cleared, The Armadillo picked himself up, brushed the loose
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debris and dust from his trench coat, and helped the dame up to her feet.
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"Well, that certainly was an adventure, now wasn't it?" he said.
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The dame gave him a weird look.
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And Hollywood sued the author for stealing lines from "The Princess Bride".
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Or at least they would, but they won't ever read this, so screw 'em.
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"What was that?" the dame breathed, frightened and shocked and confused.
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"I don't know, but I'm gonna' find out, shweetheart," The Armadillo said.
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Moving toward the window, he looked out to see a black sedan parked at
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the curb, and a man in a three piece suit get in. The Armadillo pulled
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out his revolver with surprising speed for an armadillo and took a few shots
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at the sedan before it drove off. The car sped of down the street.
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"Damn," The Armadillo said. "I'll get those sons-a-bitches."
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"My God!" said the dame, who looked out the window just as the man
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got into the car. "I know that person! Those are the guys trying to kill
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me!"
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The Armadillo turned to her. "Oh really? Who are they and why would the
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be wanting to kill you?"
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They were just a coupla' fellas workingfor the mafia until recently.
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They want me 'cause I'm the only one who knows about their new boss."
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"Who is this mysterious new boss that they wanna kill you 'cause you
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know him?" The Armadillo asked.
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"You wouldn't believe me if I told you," the dame said.
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"Try me," The Armadillo said.
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"The ressurrected Al Capone," the dame said.
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"You're right," The Armadillo said, taking the bottle of bourbon out of his
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pocket and taking a swig. "I don't believe you."
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On the other side of the city, a figure in a black tuxedo sat behind
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a very large and opulent desk. A knock sounded at the door.
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"YWho is it?" asked a very gruff Italian voice that sounded as if it
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was being spoken through a voice synthesizer.
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"Duh, it's Lumpy, Boss."
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"C'mon in Lumpy."
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Lumpy walked in, stealing himself for the encounter. He looked at the
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man behind the desk, who's right profile was in view to Lumpy. It was the
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face of an average middle aged Italian-American, but slightly scared. However,
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the scars were becoming to his features. Then he turned. Lumpy looked at the
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other side of the man's face. It was a robotic face: steel skin, mechanical
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eye, the works. The voice was filtered through a synthesizer in the man's
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throat, giving it a metallic edge. This side of the man's face always gave
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Lumpy the willies.
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"Did you do as I instructed, Lumpy?" the man asked.
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"Duh, we tried boss, but it didn't work. We blew up his office like you
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told us we should, but he survived. So did the broad." Lumpy said in a
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terrified voice.
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"WHAT!?!??!?" roared the man.
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"I'm sorry boss. It's dat damn armor of his. It fucked us up."
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"DID I ASK YOU FOR EXCUSES?" roared the man. He raised his left hand,
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which was also robotic, and shot a laser beam at Lumpy, disintegrating him
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instantly. "Let that be a lesson to you," he said.
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Just then the phone rang. "Hello," the man said. "Al Capone here."
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IS THIS REALLY AL CAPONE RESSURRECTED?
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WHO RESSURRECTED HIM?
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CAN THE ARMADILLO SURVIVE THAT LASER BEAM?
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DOES THAT DAME HAVE A NAME?
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IS ANYBODY READING THIS?
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For the answers to these and few other questions, check out that envelope
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at "Rick's Place" like I told you last time, or....
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Tune in next time...same Armadillo time....same Armadillo channel
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A production of Superguy Ltd. ---- we're Beatrice
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- - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - -
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Ode to Life
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Oh life with your trembling tresses
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Why do you put me in all of these messes?
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There's love and there's hate
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Isn't that great?
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Then someone comes over and knees ya right in the groin.
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Life can suck the chrome off a trailor hitch
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Till then,
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O.DM00se
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- - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - -
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[From hugh@kink.UUCP (Hugh D. Gamble @ Phaedra V's Amiga 2500) - Someone write
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to these people and send them the m00se.info file! We need to sign them up, and
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I'm too busy laughing! ;^) -Pat]
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Number one in the Kinky Cat Sex Series:
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Kitten With A Whip
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==================
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Kitten with a whip,
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tail, swish swish,
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take what you will,
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get what you wish.
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Teddy bear in chains,
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spread on a bed;
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fantasy games,
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deep in your head.
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Puss in leather boots,
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rising thigh high;
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black rubber suits;
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making him cry.
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Squirm from the blows,
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writhe from the pain;
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but teddy bear knows,
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that he wants it again.
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Now pussy's all hot,
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from the power trip;
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ready or not,
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next swing's from the hip.
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Teddy bear sighs;
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kitty's on top;
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there's fire in her eyes,
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and the cat won't stop.
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The world explodes,
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her claws dig in;
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then kitty cat goes,
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cause she's through with him.
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Teddy's still tied;
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lying all alone;
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even if he tried,
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he couldn't go home.
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Kitten with a whip,
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tail, swish swish,
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take what you will,
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get what you wish.
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--------------------------------------------------------------------------------
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*************************** M00SCELLANEOUS NONSENSE ****************************
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--------------------------------------------------------------------------------
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From V093P9AX (Who I still don't know the name of! :) )
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Things III
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A DEMONSTRATION TO THINGS POETRY
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--------------------------------
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Many Hugenots and other 17th century Reformers have asked me, Slapgruck,
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you are such a great poet. Why don't you teach us the way? To this I say this:
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"Gnnnnnnnnnnnannnnnnnnnng!!" (For no other reason except I like holding down
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turtles until they scream for yogurt). I then say, I am neither Slapgruck nor
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his evil Twin, Brucie, but I'll give you a primer.
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All is based on the following:
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Things are good.
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Things are bad.
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Things are great.
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Aren't you glad?
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Now, you try it. I knew you could.
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DIALOUGE
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---------------------------------
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Okay. Here's the situation. My broccoli went away on a week's vacation.
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That is the problem with being a Lenny Bruce fanatic, you get easily bowled
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over.
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WHALE GEOMETRY
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----------------------------------
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We can all benefit from the Society of Sophomores protecting Albatrosses
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and Djibouti. SOSPAAD, created in 1986, had no real pur- pose when created, but
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even less after it disbanded in early 1987.
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After the fall of Southern Civilization (what am I referring to THIS time,
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PAT 8) ), we lost all of our resourses of recourses. Of course, we can all find
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the common cure to the common cold by isolating the common cause. I have never
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screamed at a grapefruit, but it's safer than burning a flag. But, wait . . .
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THE SCREAMING AT GRAPEFRUIT AMENDMENT
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-------------------------------------
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Yes, folks. Just when you though it was safe to take out your frustrations
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every morning, we are faced with this. What are we, as omnipotent, impotent,
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non-potent, impatient, malevolent and malodorous pseudo-Americans, supposed to
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do???
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Nothing, of course. That's what they want. Oh yes, I know their kind, the
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non- grapefruit discriminants. Why, their common denominator can cause quite an
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infraction.
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- - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - -
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..."Gertie," he crooned...which is a strange thing to say to me, since
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my name's not Gertie. "Gertie my love, my potato salad, come go with me."
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Now, I'm not one to quibble over a silly little thing like a name,
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Goddess knows....ask anyone who's called me Gertie. They'll tell you the same.
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So I looked into his eyes, like limpid pools of burning petroleum, and hollered,
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"Yes, Marty my life, my splatball. I'll follow you to the ends of the Earth, or
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at least 'til next Tuesday."
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And so we went. I'm not exactly sure *where* we went, but at least it
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wasn't that dismal palace anymore. That place can get dreary after a while.
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'Specially with Stella moaning about the apples in her nostrils. My, what a
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wet blanket. Definitely depressing.
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We hopped into Marty's helicopter, and drove off down the road. It
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really is a nice 'copter - all shiny chrome and gleaming glass and naugahide
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interior. Too bad for all those naugas, though. Poor things.
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We bumped along, never a care in the world, until suddenly there was
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this sickening thud. Marty pulled over and got out to look at what we'd hit.
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It was a narwhal, the poor thing. Broke its horn clean off, and so it looked
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just like a manatee. A mortally injured manatee, granted, but a manatee
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nonetheless. We picked it up, beat it until it was totally and irretrievably
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dead, and dumped it into the trunk.
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("FOOT LOCKER!" Shut up, Stella. I'm telling this story.)
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A little while later, after Marty strapped on a parachute and bailed
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out, mumbling something about forgetting to turn off the iron that morning,
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I took the 'copter down to ground level, and had a look around. Unfortunately,
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I took it too far and ended up decapitating a whole schoolyard full of kids
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with the 'copter blades. Hey, when I goof, at least it's productive.
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I dragged myself out of the burning, twisted wreckage, only to find
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that the trunk and a case of Chivas Regal had been thrown clear. Being unable
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to carry either one of them for any distance, what with the narwhal carcass
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in the trunk and everything, I decided to make the best of a bad job and have
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a party. I opened the trunk, thinking to hack off a few narwhal steaks to
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roast in the burning wreckage, only to find that the narwhal was gone and a
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full array of Mary Kay cosmetics had appeared in its place. (Yes, it was the
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trunk from the living room.)
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Well. If I couldn't barbecue narwhal, I'd have to make do as best I
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could. I searched around the carnage of the schoolyard for some tidbits, and
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you know something? Children wings basted with cold cream really does hit the
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spot. Especially when chased with a couple of bottles of Chivas. Aaaaaaaah!
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Well, just about then, I heard the sound of windswept nylon, and Marty
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landed square on my head. Little darling - he's such a kidder. He scrambled
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off, hacking at the shroud lines with a bow saw, and screaming about spiders.
|
|
What a character. I tried to follow him, but ended up getting lost among all
|
|
the ambulances which suddenly appeared. All those pretty flashing lights.
|
|
Quite hypnotic. I guess that's what first attracted me to Marty. Ambulances
|
|
follow him, like sharks follow a whaling ship. He really does lead an exciting
|
|
life.
|
|
|
|
Just your daily dose of wierdness....
|
|
Lorelei
|
|
- - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - -
|
|
[Submitted (Without even knowing it! ;^) ) by atw@mtunf.ATT.COM (Allen Ward)
|
|
ANOTHER not-m00se that should be! -Pat]
|
|
|
|
LITTLE RED RIDING HOOD
|
|
1989
|
|
|
|
Once upon a time the was a girl by the name of Little Red Riding Hood, who
|
|
was on her way to her Grandmother's house. As she passed a large rock a
|
|
large bear jumped out and said "Red Riding Hood, The Big bad wolf is waiting
|
|
for you at your grandmother's house. He said he's going to tie you down on
|
|
the bed, and screw your brains out!" "No he won't," said Little Red Riding
|
|
Hood. "I've got a gun, and if he tries that I'll blow him away!" So off
|
|
goes Little Red Riding Hood down the road to Grandmother's house when she
|
|
is approached by a rabbit. "Little Red Riding Hood, the Big bad wolf is
|
|
waiting for you at your Grandmother's house, He said he's going to tie you
|
|
down to the bed and screw your brains out!" "I'm not worried Mr. Rabbit,
|
|
I've got a gun, and if he tries something, he's going to be in big trouble."
|
|
So off goes Red down the road and finally arriving at Grandmother's house.
|
|
As she walks through the front door the Big bad wolf jumps out and says,"AH HA,
|
|
Now I've got you Little Red Riding Hood! I"m going to tie you to this bed and
|
|
screw your brains out!" Red Riding Hood quickly pulls her piece and says "OH
|
|
NO YOU'RE NOT GOING TO TIE ME TO THE BED AND SCREW MY BRAINS OUT, I HAVE A GUN
|
|
AND YOU'RE GOING TO EAT ME LIKE THE FAIRY TALE SAYS!!!!"
|
|
|
|
Fairy Tales have changed!
|
|
AL
|
|
{PROTECTOR OF THE PLEASURE PRINCIPLE}
|
|
- - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - -
|
|
[Submitted by Yale-Martin <DEGSUSM@YALEVM.BITNET> -Pat]
|
|
-----------------------------------------------------------------
|
|
_The Cat in the Hat_
|
|
by Dr. Seuss, 61 pages. Beginner Books, $3.95
|
|
Reviewed by: Josh LeBeau
|
|
|
|
The Cat in the Hat is a hard-hitting novel of prose and poetry in
|
|
which the author re-examines [?] through the window of their
|
|
single-family dwelling. In the foreground, a large tree/phallic
|
|
symbol dances wildly in the wind, taunting the children and
|
|
encouraging them to succumb to the sexual yearnings they
|
|
undoubtedly feel for each other. Even to the most unlearned
|
|
reader, the blatant references to the incestuous relationship the
|
|
two share set the tone for Seuss' probing examination of the
|
|
satisfaction of primitive needs. The Cat proceeds to charm the
|
|
wary youths into engaging in what he so innocently refers to as
|
|
"tricks." At this point, the fish, an obvious Christ figure who
|
|
represents the prevailing Christian morality, attempts to warn
|
|
the children, and thus, in effect, warns all of humanity of the
|
|
dangers associated with the unleashing of the primal urges. In
|
|
response to this, the cat proceeds to balance the aquatic
|
|
naysayer on the end of his umbrella, essentially saying, "Down
|
|
with morality; down with God!"
|
|
|
|
After poohpoohing the righteous rantings of the waterlogged
|
|
Christ figure, the Cat begins to juggle several icons of Western
|
|
culture, most notably two books, representing the Old and New
|
|
Testaments, and a saucer of lactal fluid, an ironic reference to
|
|
maternal loss the two children experienced when their mother
|
|
abandoned them "for the afternoon." Our heroic Id adds to this
|
|
bold gesture a rake and a toy man, and thus completes the Oedipal
|
|
triangle.
|
|
|
|
Later in the novel, Seuss introduces the proverbial Pandora's
|
|
box, a large red crate out of which the Id releases Thing One, or
|
|
Freud's concept of Ego, the division of the psyche that serves as
|
|
the conscious mediator between the person and reality, and Thing
|
|
Two, the Superego which functions to reward and punish through a
|
|
system of moral attitudes, conscience, and guilt. Referring to
|
|
this box, the Cat says, "Now look at this trick. Take a look!"
|
|
In this, Dr. Seuss uses the children as a brilliant metaphor for
|
|
the reader, and asks the reader to re-examine his own inner self.
|
|
|
|
The children, unable to control the Id, Ego, and Superego allow
|
|
these creatures to run free and mess up the house, or more
|
|
symbolically, control their lives. This rampage continues until
|
|
the fish, or Christ symbol, warns that the mother is returning to
|
|
reinstate the Oedipal triangle that existed before her abandonment
|
|
of the children. At this point, Seuss introduces a many-armed
|
|
cleaning device which represents the psychoanalytic couch, which
|
|
proceeds to put the two youngsters' lives back in order.
|
|
|
|
With powerful simplicity, clarity, and drama, Seuss reduces
|
|
Freud's concepts on the dynamics of the human psyche to an easily
|
|
understood gesture. Mr. Seuss' poetry and choice of words is
|
|
equally impressive and serves as a splendid counterpart to his
|
|
bold symbolism. In all, his writing style is quick and fluid,
|
|
making _The Cat in the Hat_ impossible to put down. While this
|
|
novel is 61 pages in length, and one can read it in five minutes
|
|
or less, it is not until after multiple readings that the genius
|
|
of this modern day master becomes apparent.
|
|
|
|
-------------------------------------------------------------------------
|
|
Josh LeBeau writes for Koala, UCSD's humor newspaper, which has absolutely
|
|
no copyright notices anywhere.
|
|
-------------------------------------------------------------------------
|
|
--------------------------------------------------------------------------------
|
|
******************************* MEET THE M00SES ********************************
|
|
--------------------------------------------------------------------------------
|
|
NAME: Michael Oose
|
|
SCHOOL ADDRESS: Drew University
|
|
BC-COMPCEN
|
|
Madison, NJ 07940
|
|
PHONE NUMBER: Drew Ext. 8423
|
|
NODE NAME: DRUNIVAC
|
|
USERID: MOOSE
|
|
HOME ADDRESS: RD 1
|
|
Harappa, ON
|
|
SCHOOL: Drew University
|
|
CLASS: 1993
|
|
MAJOR: Computer Science
|
|
NICKNAMES: Mike (friends and family)
|
|
Mr. Oose (zoo keepers, animal trainers, publishers clearing
|
|
house)
|
|
Moose (close friends and mammals)
|
|
Animal (those who have seen me eat)
|
|
Communist Pig (those who don't like mooses)
|
|
Dinner (hunters)
|
|
BIRTHDATE: Sometime in the late 60's (what do you expect I was born in the
|
|
woods).
|
|
RELIGION: Mookerjian (I worship the confused moose god.)
|
|
POLITICS: Anarchist
|
|
PHYSICAL DESCRIPTION:
|
|
Big, heavy, furry, big nose, two big antlers, a stylist tail,
|
|
four long strong legs, two big brown eyes. I don't wear
|
|
glasses since they won't balance right on my nose, and besides
|
|
contacts are much better for those rare moments I am being
|
|
chased by hunters.
|
|
HOBBIES: I like to write trashy romance novels (I am still working on
|
|
the first one.) I love to play practical jokes, and leave my
|
|
friends weird mail. I am also member of a semi-secret
|
|
Illuminati orginization. I also like to sleep, and sometimes
|
|
chase rug rats. Oh, eating, how could I ever forget that. I
|
|
love to eat line printer paper. YUM! I watch soap operas too.
|
|
Playing dead at the side of a major highway is always fun.
|
|
READING: I read a lot of nature books. They remind me of home. I also
|
|
tend to spend a lot of time researching the great trash authors
|
|
of this decade. Romance novels are so educational.
|
|
MUSIC: I'm a wilderness moose. I love that hoof stomping country beat,
|
|
and their wonderfully traditional "my dog died" lyrics. They
|
|
make me feel at home. That doesn't make me stuff though. On
|
|
weekends I wear some fancy fur and slick back my antlers for
|
|
a night at the clubs. Such fun. I am the life of the party
|
|
there because I have more feet than anyone else there, and let
|
|
me tell you what an added advantage a tail is at those places!
|
|
FAVORITE TV SHOW: Bullwinkle. (He's my hero.)
|
|
FAVORITE MOVIES: The Moose That Ate Everything, The Three Mooseketeers
|
|
THINGS THAT ANNOY ME:
|
|
Moose Hunters, construction sites, forest fires, paper shortages
|
|
Zoos, People trying to make cloth lines on my antlers.
|
|
LOVES: The company of fellow mooses. I'm all alone at the moment.
|
|
ATTENTION FEMALE MOOSES: SEND MAIL.
|
|
QUOTES:
|
|
Mooooooooose.
|
|
-Unknown
|
|
|
|
ArooooOOOOOOoooooooo.
|
|
-Traditional
|
|
|
|
I'm so confused.
|
|
-Bullwinkle
|
|
|
|
I'm so depressed.
|
|
-unavailable for further comment
|
|
--------------------------------------------------------------------------------
|
|
*************** AND, OF COURSE, THE UBIQUITOUS M00SE LIST UPDATE ***************
|
|
--------------------------------------------------------------------------------
|
|
TOTAL CHAPTERS: 162
|
|
|
|
THRONG/CHAPTER USERID NODE NAME
|
|
--------------------------------------------------------------------------------
|
|
|
|
Alaska thr0ng FSDEM2 @ ALASKA Mugwump
|
|
(5 chapters) FSJBK @ ALASKA G00se
|
|
FSJPC @ ALASKA Jonathan
|
|
FSSTM @ ALASKA Steve Munk
|
|
TSJV @ ALASKA Boogel
|
|
|
|
Apple Computer, inc. chapter REWING @ APPLE.COM SlickRick
|
|
|
|
Berkeley chapter MHIRSCH @ MATH.BERKELEY.EDU
|
|
Micheal
|
|
|
|
Boston University thr0ng ENLDC8C @ BUACCA Paladin
|
|
(3 chapters) LAN @ BUCSF.BU.EDU
|
|
Larry Nathanson
|
|
CLXLAUC @ BUACCA Rorshach
|
|
|
|
Brockport thr0ng DS1437 @ BROCK1P Don Schleede
|
|
(3 chapters) KG5927 @ BROCK1P Fry-Guy
|
|
MW2440 @ BROCK1P FryM00se
|
|
|
|
Bucknell Chapter SHAFFERJ @ BKNLVMS James Shaffer
|
|
|
|
The U.B. Mega/Giga Throng
|
|
(46 Chapters)
|
|
V047KFZ7 @ UBVMS Grim-M00se
|
|
V054NN84 @ UBVMS PacifistM00se
|
|
V056GZPK @ UBVMS BritM00se
|
|
V056QKT3 @ UBVMS L0i0m00se
|
|
V061REGM @ UBVMS Captain Devious!
|
|
V065L4KV @ UBVMS Donald Duck
|
|
V065LRN6 @ UBVMS The M00sco Kid
|
|
V066EDD9 @ UBVMS Musical M00se
|
|
V067LUFD @ UBVMS Riff, DeathM00se
|
|
V068GZ8E @ UBVMS Evil
|
|
V068MVHU @ UBVMS Brandy M00se
|
|
V078QM32 @ UBVMS F00nels
|
|
V078JQ@Q @ UBVMS BullWinkle
|
|
V083PZ6U @ UBVMS Confused
|
|
V085PWPZ @ UBVMS Vam00se,Valerie :)
|
|
V090QRDN @ UBVMS Irish DreamM00se
|
|
V093QLRB @ UBVMS Gund Prime
|
|
V096JBXL @ UBVMS G0neR0gueSch0lar M00se
|
|
V096NHDQ @ UBVMS Chris M00spaw
|
|
V097NQQG @ UBVMS EXPL0RER 01
|
|
V098PZJD @ UBVMS Cardinal M00se, The
|
|
Grand Illuminator
|
|
V100JVAE @ UBVMS Red M00se
|
|
V101PYRW @ UBVMS Villager M00se
|
|
V109MEN5 @ UBVMS O.DM00SE
|
|
V110JQ34 @ UBVMS The Reverend M00ster
|
|
V113PX6J @ UBVMS Not M00se
|
|
V115NQF5 @ UBVMS Michele Karlinski
|
|
V115GWE6 @ UBVMS Canisius M00se,Doctor X
|
|
V115QRJ8 @ UBVMS MightyM00se
|
|
V116PFFT @ UBVMS Zem00se
|
|
V117MG7B @ UBVMS Lord Masinde,L0rd M00se
|
|
Spot Toxic
|
|
V118PV6E @ UBVMS Crissm00se
|
|
V122QQVZ @ UBVMS Sweeper M00se
|
|
V123NKUX @ UBVMS DArkling M00se
|
|
V123P62M @ UBVMS Lorelei
|
|
V126HN32 @ UBVMS Father Judas M00se
|
|
V129N2V6 @ UBVMS G.I. M00se, SgtGim00se
|
|
V133NNUW @ UBVMS BigBadM00se
|
|
V285RAAG @ UBVMS Sm00sh
|
|
V291NHTP @ UBVMS Pat, WarM00se,
|
|
DangerM00se
|
|
V409EPKE @ UBVMS CygM00se
|
|
|
|
|
|
And our REMOTE members of the UB SUPERTHR0NG:
|
|
|
|
JJZ @ S.CC.PERDUE.EDU
|
|
EC256A46 @ CANISIUS Claudette M00se
|
|
DMCGURRIN @ CANISIUS Long Legs Dee M00se
|
|
HARRIS @ CANISIUS (NO NAME GIVEN)
|
|
IN%"JPRISCO @OSWEGO.OSWEGO.EDU
|
|
Pope Zaphod I of the 80 M00ses
|
|
|
|
Colgate U chapter JSIMON @ COLGATEU Jamie
|
|
|
|
Connecticut College chapter LMRAC @ CONNCOLL Rat
|
|
|
|
Connecticut State U thr0ng CLAFFEY_JOR @ CTSTATEU Indiana Joe
|
|
(8 chapters) COLANGELO @ CTSTATEU Ken Colangelo
|
|
CRAMER @ CTSTATEU Scopus
|
|
HENNEQUI_WEM @ CTSTATEU Anonym00se
|
|
LEE_JES @ CTSTATEU SalmonM00se
|
|
PHINNEY_AVK @ CTSTATEU Phredde
|
|
WENGER_BRE @ CTSTATEU
|
|
WITHALL @ CTSTATEU Goblin
|
|
|
|
Cornell thr0ng CBRY @ CORNELLA Ladykate
|
|
(2 chapters) ZEMANIAN%CHEME.DECNET @ CHEME.TN.CORNELL.EDU
|
|
Spaceman Biff
|
|
|
|
CUNY chapter S99QC @ CUNYVM Yossi
|
|
|
|
Drew Thr0ng KLOHNER @ DRUNIVAC Karl Lohner
|
|
(3 chapters) MHEAD @ DREW Drewid
|
|
MOOSE @ DRUNIVAC Mr. Oose
|
|
|
|
HABiT (H0use 0f Ap0stles DB06103 @ UAFSYSB M00se Man
|
|
0f Biggles Thr0ng) DB06103 @ UAFSYSB Ms. M00se
|
|
(3 chapters) JC06081 @ UAFSYSB Nemesis Milph
|
|
|
|
Hartford thr0ng AHRENS @ HARTFORD Wrangle
|
|
(7 chapters) BEAUBIEN @ HARTFORD Sindex
|
|
DICKSON @ HARTFORD Pickle/MOON ROACH!
|
|
ROSSI @ HARTFORD The Chairman
|
|
SZIMMERM @ HARTFORD Greymalkin
|
|
WEIMAN @ HARTFORD Rhiannon/Sushi
|
|
WHITE @ HARTFORD Demon Ick
|
|
|
|
Haverford thr0ng K_KRAVITZ @ HVRFORD Q.[A
|
|
(2 chapters) S_BLINN @ HVRFORD Sean Blinn
|
|
|
|
Kansas State Uni. Chapter BETH1 @ KSUVM Beth
|
|
|
|
Lansing, NY thr0ng B45J @ CORNELLA Lord Sabre
|
|
(4 chapters) B45J @ CRNLVAX5 Half-Elf
|
|
B45J @ CRNLVAX5 The Innkeeper
|
|
WXCY @ CRNLVAX5 Lord Trelf
|
|
|
|
Loyola thr0ng FRANK @ LOYVAX Spank
|
|
(8 chapters) GAIL @ LOYVAX Sybil
|
|
KEVIN @ LOYVAX
|
|
Mr. Sparebuttonssuppliedwithhisshirt
|
|
MARKUS @ LOYVAX Markus
|
|
MARY_BETH @ LOYVAX Cinderella
|
|
PAMELA @ LOYVAX Mommydammit
|
|
STASA @ LOYVAX Phoenix
|
|
TERESA @ LOYVAX Teresa
|
|
|
|
Maine chapter IO80222 @ MAINE Rainmaker
|
|
|
|
Marist chapter KKG1 @ MARISTB Crimson M00se
|
|
|
|
New Hampshire Uni. Chapter J-BUTMAN @ UNHH Oliver
|
|
|
|
North Dakota State U. chapter UD140680 @ NDSUVM1 The Anachronist
|
|
|
|
Northeastern U. chapter ACM_MDB @ NUHUB The_Sage
|
|
|
|
0ber0n Trading Thr0ng ST5616 @ SIUCVMB QuantumCat
|
|
(2 chapters) ST6344 @ SIUCVMB Black_D0G the pirate
|
|
|
|
Old Dominion University thr0ng LBS100S @ ODUVM (nick unknown)
|
|
(3 chapters) MRH100C @ ODUVM Frizbog Gordnik
|
|
SAB100C @ ODUVM Sandi Bedford
|
|
|
|
Penn State thr0ng MSP @ PSUECL Mark S. Pfaff
|
|
(2 chapters) WCF @ PSUECL Bill Fenner
|
|
|
|
Portland thr0ng IP85014 @ PORTLAND qwerty
|
|
(2 chapters) IP85033 @ PORTLAND Mitya the Red M00se
|
|
|
|
Pratt Institute Chapter TPIERCE @ PRATT M0ab
|
|
|
|
Purdue Chapter PATWHITE @ PURCCVM Patrick White
|
|
|
|
Siberacuse thr0ng CRUSSELL @ SUNRISE GypsyLynx
|
|
(7 chapters) JBANKERT @ SUNRISE CHAOS Engineer
|
|
RABEELER @ SUNRISE Beez
|
|
RETANTS @ SUNRISE Scamp
|
|
VASISON @ SUNRISE Vince Sison
|
|
LIBLJR @ SUVM Niniane
|
|
LIBISU2 @ SUVM Guardian Angel
|
|
|
|
Stony Brook thr0ng CJAMES @ SBCCVM Carl James
|
|
(12 chapters) DEISENBE @ SBCCVM David Eisenberg
|
|
GSMITH @ SBCCVM Gregg Smith
|
|
JDN @ SBCS.SUNYSB.EDU
|
|
John Norden
|
|
JROSENSH @ SBCCVM JoM00se
|
|
RRKHAN @ SBCCVM Romel
|
|
WALL @ SBCCVM Wall
|
|
DNOVELLA @ SBCCVM Doug Novellano
|
|
MFISCHER @ SBCCVM Greendog
|
|
MROSE @ SBCCVM MagickM00se
|
|
GSMITH @ SBCCVM M00sicM00se
|
|
CLFSI @ SBCCVM Fnord
|
|
|
|
Sweden chapter ICE @ SEQZ51 Ice
|
|
|
|
U California Riverside chapter WATKINS @ UCRVMS Kevin
|
|
|
|
UConn chapter WALLFESH @ UCONNVM Sande
|
|
|
|
U Regina thr0ng BLACKWEL @ UREGINA1 Mickey M00se
|
|
(2 chapters) RUDYK @ UREGINA1 BackdoorM00se
|
|
|
|
Villanova thr0ng 054649739 @ VUVAXCOM Squish
|
|
(6 chapters) 188622462 @ VUVAXCOM Kamikaze
|
|
580074787 @ VUVAXCOM Fiben
|
|
59401463 @ VUVAXCOM Starscream
|
|
SWORD05 @ VUVAXCOM Ford Prefect
|
|
WATER @ VUVAXCOM The Doctor
|
|
|
|
Washington State U. thr0ng 24945863 @ WSUVM1 Bard
|
|
(3 chapters) 23480853 @ WSUVM1 Ishtar
|
|
90289872 @ WSUVM1 Cthulhu
|
|
|
|
Wesleyan thr0ng AG @ WESLEYAN Damsel
|
|
(8 chapters) JBLUESTEIN @ WESLEYAN WabeWalker
|
|
JVINCENT @ WESLEYAN Lord Rassilon
|
|
JDOTY @ WESLEYAN The Keeper
|
|
LBURKA @ WESLEYAN The Heresiarch
|
|
LGREENSTEIN @ WESLEYAN Pope Atheist I
|
|
LMARR @ WESLEYAN His Serene Randomness
|
|
RSIMON @ WESLEYAN Rich ??
|
|
|
|
Wilfred Hyde-White thr0ng CWELLER @ TRINCC b0liver shagnastY iv
|
|
(2 chapters) FANTASYG @ TRINCC Trinity Fantasy Guild
|
|
|
|
Xavier chapter BRUGGMNJ @ XAVIER the WILD ONE!!!
|
|
|
|
?? chapter OZER%ARKLE.DECNET
|
|
@ CHEME.TN.CORNELL.EDU
|
|
--------------------------------------------------------------------------------
|
|
Pointy Issue-Pointy Issue-Pointy Issue-Pointy Issue-Pointy Issue-Pointy Issue
|
|
--------------------------------------------------------------------------------
|