169 lines
8.0 KiB
Plaintext
169 lines
8.0 KiB
Plaintext
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A Hamster Bedtime Story
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_______________________
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The characters (purely fictional of course *cough*):
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Evilster (Evilster) - Fictional Ex-friend of the nark
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IgnoGerbil (IG) - NARK
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DamnedHamster - Fictional Storyteller (Me!@#)
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#hamsters - The fictional channel this took place on
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hamsters - Fictional term for people that hang
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out on #hamsters
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Disklaimer: All characters in this fictional story are
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fictional. Any resemblance to real or other
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fictional characters is purely unintentional.
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Fictional (had to say it once more).
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The story:
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IG and Evilster were good friends at a college on the East
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Coast. Every day they would hang out, messed with their
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computers, drank coffee, gossiped/talked, and had fun. Since
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they both had computers, and both had net accounts, they both
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developed a sense of curiosity about the internet. Sometime
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after activating their accounts, IG decided she wanted to get
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on IRC, and Evilster said "I'll get us there". Two days later,
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they were both IRCing and having a great 'ole time.
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Weeks passed, and they met a guy that seemed willing
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to help them out with some unix/irc_client problems (Enter
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DamnedHamster). One night, the three of them sat in a channel and
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worked on the problem of compiling an IRC client for their
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home accounts, so they could easily access IRC without
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telneting. All I could tell from conversation was, they were
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the only two people who wanted to IRC from their home
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accounts. Both seemed pretty cool in general, and the
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challenge of getting a client running was quite fun.
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As time passed, I found out that very few people from
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their college used their net accounts, and that those that did
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only used mail (roughly 15,000 accounts, never more than 100
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people on from their college at once). I also found out, that
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they were basically the only two people from their college who
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knew of, and used IRC at all. During these weeks of IRCing,
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IG had problems of all sorts. Common sense eluded her in many
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cases which frustrated the hell out of her counterpart, which
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caused tension between them.
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The whole time this was going on, Evilster was becoming good
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friends with all the people on #hamsters. Feeling left out, IG
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wanted to get in with a similiar group of hamsters. It was a
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matter of days before she became a class one info-whore. Within
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hours of hanging out with other hamsters, she had given her
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password out to several of these hamsters in hopes of being
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accepted, and learning more about this great hamster cage we
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all live in.
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If you don't know much about the net, and systems, and
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operating systems, let me fill you in on something. As soon
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as a hamster has a new place to play, they explore their
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surroundings quite well. They look for 'backdoors' to become
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the Big Hamster of the area, and eventually take 'Root' on a
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system. Once IgnoGerbil had given her password out, several
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of these wiley hamsters invaded the system. It took less than
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a day for her entire system to lose its security. The whole
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time IG was handing her password out, Evilster was
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explaining the consequences of doing so. Her response, "But I
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change it everyday!@#$". Of course, we all know that once a
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hamster is in your room, he doesn't have to leave. He often
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establishes other routes into the room.
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A month passes, Evilster moves away to live with
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DamnedHamster, IG feels left out, gives her password out to more
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hamsters, and things progress...
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During this month that passes, Evilster loses her
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account due to wiley hamsters. Despite the loss of the
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account, she continues to use DamnedHamster's account to IRC and chat
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with the other hamsters. During her process of 'learning' the
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ways of the hamster, IG decides to start teaching her sysadmin
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the same thing. Sysadmin is quite upset at all the holes into
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his room, and spends time patching them up one at a time, only
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to discover(through mail from IgnoGerbil) that there are
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more holes. IG also decides to inform the sysadmin, that
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Evilster and herself are the reason behind all the wiley
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hamsters invading the system. By this time, even some warez puppies
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had root at their system.
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Current status in our story... Evilster is still out of her
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original account, IG has given her password to over 20
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hamsters, warez pups had taken root at the system, IG was in
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continual contact via email with 'Sysadmin', IG was still
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looking for a group of hamsters to play with.
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Throughout email contact, not only did IG inform the
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sysadmin of her own actions and associations, she also
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informed him of Evilster's habit of talking with hamsters. Days
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later, IG informed 'Sysadmin' of certain other hamsters and
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their nicknames who were suspected of playing in the system.
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The rodents of #hamsters caught wind of this and didn't like
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it. IgnoGerbil soon found she wasn't liked in #hamsters,
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and became an outcast to their little world. Word spread of
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her narcing to other hamsters in other channels, and soon, she
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was back chatting with old irc friends.
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The more word spread, the more outraged IG became.
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Here she was, wanting to be a hamster one day, but all the
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other hamsters hated her!@$! Revenge came to her mind..So she
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mailed Evilster and threatened her several times, in various
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ways. Everything from leaking her info, to narcing her
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more/again to 'Sysadmin'. Evilster reminded IG that to do
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that would enrage the other hamsters, and they might get wiley
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in the system, and play rough.
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And the story continues.. as each day passes, more of
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this story is written.. (ie: a sequel to this story maybe!)
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To sum up what IG narced on:
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Herself
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Her ex-best friend
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Her ex-best friend's boyfriend
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Denizens of #hamsters
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Various other hamsters by name
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Different holes into their realm
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Just for reference, 'Sysadmin' has always hated IRC
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for various reasons. Because of the troubles IG has brought
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from IRC, he is currently using some wierd thing called 'Dee
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En Are' on indials to their realm. He is also monitoring all
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mail in and out of various accounts, carefully watching the
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logs, and still staying in touch with his favorite narc.
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Sources: IgnoGerbil - Via email, vox conversations, and
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various irc logs.
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DamnedHamster - Via observation.
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Evilster - Relays of vox conversations and
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various irc logs.
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I beg you fellow hamsters.. flee to a different realm,
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frolic in other pastures rich with fresh grass and NO FUCKING
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NARKS.
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DamnedHamster
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PS: /mode #hamsters +b *!*garner@*oswego*
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/mode #hamsters +b *!*ivory@*eidos*
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