535 lines
19 KiB
Plaintext
535 lines
19 KiB
Plaintext
|
|
[\__/] i don't care if you read this [\__/]
|
|
.-( Oo )---------------------------------( oO )-.---------.
|
|
| |..| volume numero uno mi amigo! |..| | email |
|
|
| ~~ los funky ass biznatchin' zine! ~~ | version |
|
|
`-----------------------------------------------^---------'
|
|
|
|
table of contents:
|
|
|
|
.o introduction to idciyrt
|
|
.o interview with m0gel
|
|
.o save a plant, eat a cow
|
|
.o a little cybersex (can't hurt, eh?)
|
|
.o ode to my armpits
|
|
|
|
/\__/\ ---------------------------------------.
|
|
( o@ ) this divider line is better than d2o's |
|
|
|..| ----------------------------------------'
|
|
~~
|
|
|
|
welcome to my third mag so far. it's not much to look
|
|
at. you may not even feel that it's not too much to
|
|
read, but i don't really care. hence the name of the
|
|
mag. if you don't like reading mags, then reply to
|
|
this email and ask to be taken off of the email
|
|
list and it'll be done promptly. if you like it, and
|
|
know someone who would enjoy getting this annoying
|
|
piece of junk in their box, send me their email
|
|
address. i am on several mailing lists myself, so
|
|
i can also get you on a couple others if you like.
|
|
|
|
you can save this message and make a .zip, .arj (or
|
|
whatever compressor is your favorite) with a little
|
|
file_id.diz file in it to describe it, and upload
|
|
it to your local favorite bbs. so far, this is
|
|
possibly the only way that idciyrt will be distributed
|
|
around, save some bbsni in the 714 huntington beach
|
|
california and 908 toms river new jersey area.
|
|
|
|
so spread the word if you like... if not. phine. be a
|
|
bitch.
|
|
|
|
|
|
/\__/\ ---------------------------------------------.
|
|
( co ) this is not a divider line... this is not... |
|
|
|..| ----------------------------------------------'
|
|
~~
|
|
interview with mogel
|
|
|
|
a little foreshadowing before we get into this interview. mogel is a
|
|
prominent figure in the "underground 'zine scene", so he is quite
|
|
influencial. this is just for those of you who are way too lame to hang out
|
|
on irc a ll day like we do.
|
|
|
|
|
|
you ask mogel once for an interview...
|
|
|
|
(mogel) I don't do interviews.
|
|
|
|
twice...
|
|
|
|
(mogel) I'm not one for self-indulgence.
|
|
|
|
three times
|
|
|
|
(mogel) I just write stupid t-files.
|
|
|
|
four...
|
|
|
|
(mogel) pip do you like gumby's poetry?
|
|
|
|
and then he folds on the fifth...
|
|
|
|
|
|
(mogel) fine.
|
|
> you're a jerkoff
|
|
(mogel) you do realize that I'm going to be highly abusive in this interview,
|
|
don't you?
|
|
> eye don't care if you're abusive
|
|
> I like it
|
|
> I've been a bad boy
|
|
(mogel) good.
|
|
(mogel) I will spank you.
|
|
(mogel) hurry up already.
|
|
> OK, ready?
|
|
(mogel) ready, asshole.
|
|
* Pip flips on the tape.
|
|
> (whirrrrr)
|
|
> are the allegations of you and the dead puppy prostitution ring true or
|
|
false?
|
|
(mogel) false. I only dig squid. sorry.
|
|
> how did you get into modeming? were you an abused child? did you not like
|
|
the regular diet of TV that your family probably fed you in your suburban
|
|
home?
|
|
(mogel) ahem.
|
|
> TALK DAMNIT@#!
|
|
(mogel) first off, although I come from a sick and diseased yuppie area, I am
|
|
a true city-boy.
|
|
(mogel) anyhow,
|
|
> true as in the sense of west side story city?
|
|
(mogel) some five-six years ago this pally of mine got my dad's
|
|
"prodigy-only" modem to call up some local bbs.
|
|
(mogel) yeah. I met a girl named maria.
|
|
(mogel) anyhow,
|
|
> yes... go on...
|
|
> please enunciate... the tape recorder's old you know....
|
|
(mogel) I became an instant door-game geekster. oh yes. tradewars forever.
|
|
> tradewars... you don't say...
|
|
(mogel) then I began exploring more shady stuff.
|
|
(mogel) I will not comment upon it.
|
|
> you were, what.. 14? 15?
|
|
(mogel) eventually, I became deep into the t-file thing about 2 years ago.
|
|
> just the age for a youngster to get into mischievous things...
|
|
(mogel) uh.
|
|
(mogel) no.
|
|
> ahhh... I remember those days well...
|
|
> of dad...
|
|
> and the shower... and...
|
|
(mogel) I think I was 14 when I started.
|
|
> sorry, this is YOUR interview...
|
|
(mogel) oh so silly.
|
|
(mogel) pip you big silly bastard.
|
|
(mogel) let's see here.
|
|
(mogel) over a year ago,
|
|
(mogel) I stared "hoe" out of boredom. I wanted to make a stupid 'zine to
|
|
bring a buncha rad writer guys around together. oh, and I had a
|
|
cdc-wannabe thing.
|
|
> yes, that's well talked about in the #zine inner circle...
|
|
(mogel) hoe grew bigger and bigger. I was happy. ultimately, I fell in love
|
|
with a few cdc people, but the rest all were big asshole's to me.
|
|
(mogel) so I cut out of writing for cdc (I wrote two issues for them. one
|
|
day they'll come out).
|
|
(mogel) and then I cut off hoe. it was too much of a cdc/blah rip for me.
|
|
(mogel) we took all our rad talents and pooled them with bf and pez into dto.
|
|
(mogel) there. phew.
|
|
> is that it?
|
|
> are you going to shut up?
|
|
> please?
|
|
(mogel) next question, fuckface.
|
|
> OK... now for my next question...
|
|
(mogel) indeed.
|
|
(mogel) fire away, dickhead.
|
|
> as one of the more prominent, or THE most prominent figure in the #zine
|
|
scene, how do you deal with the so called '#zine groupies'...
|
|
> please do tell...
|
|
(mogel) I love 'em! there's nothing like getting you're ego stoked.
|
|
(mogel) uh
|
|
> any of them especially annoying? tiring?
|
|
(mogel) actually, there's only a few groupie guys.
|
|
> do you want to, say... shoot any?
|
|
(mogel) some are annoying.
|
|
(mogel) I guess I usually just answer their questions and ignore them.
|
|
> commit murder, per se? maybe a little blood shed is what the #zine scene
|
|
needs... would you say mogel? why don't you talk about that
|
|
(mogel) death is good.
|
|
(mogel) I like it.
|
|
> WHY DON'T YOU TALK ABOUT THE INNOCENTS THAT YOU SLAUGHTERED WHEN THEY SAID
|
|
HOE WASN'T AS GOOD AS GASP YOU DIRTY BASTARD!
|
|
(mogel) I want more of it.
|
|
> huh?
|
|
> why don't you talk about _that_
|
|
(mogel) well, that's just a blasphemous lie.
|
|
(mogel) hoe is obviously better.
|
|
(bF) no way! it's true!
|
|
(bF) he did it!
|
|
> and who would you be?
|
|
(mogel) bf@!#?
|
|
(mogel) is that you!@#?!@#
|
|
(bF) I'm black Francis!
|
|
(bF) I'm a poser!
|
|
> ahhh...
|
|
> I see... but this isn't your interview... please be quiet
|
|
(bF) oh.. ok
|
|
(mogel) hurry up, (insert generic insult here).
|
|
> now mogel, is it true that you're not actually going to rit, but are
|
|
actually working full time at a 7-11 on the corner of main and 2nd street
|
|
in NYC?
|
|
(mogel) actually, I'm _at_ rit, however not as a student. I'm actually
|
|
smuggling deadpuppies to students.
|
|
> would you say that they were deadpuppies.com?
|
|
> (horrible plug)
|
|
(mogel) it's a big money maker. you'd be surprised.
|
|
> I have heard rumors about you and Jessica Hahn vacationing in Tahiti on the
|
|
taxpayer's money... is that ALSO true...
|
|
|
|
[mogel took quite some time to answer this question, hiding something?]
|
|
|
|
> ANSWER THE FUCKING QUES... sorry... please answer my question....
|
|
> heeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeelo?@#?@#?!#?
|
|
(mogel) no. I am saving myself for Bjork.
|
|
(mogel) I'm sorry.
|
|
|
|
- mogel is ~MPG4681@vaxb.isc.rit.edu (chuck foo)
|
|
- on channels: #ZiNeS @#netsex @#teen.fuck.frenzy @#gaysex
|
|
- on irc via server azure.acsu.buffalo.edu ([128.205.7.6] University at Buffalo, Buffalo NY, U)
|
|
|
|
[ you can see why he's so distracted]
|
|
|
|
(mogel) I'm a virgin! I admit it! Bjork is my one true love.
|
|
> yes yes yes... sure she is... but what I'm sure you know, but don't want to
|
|
admit about your lover, is that she's actually A SIBERIAN TIGER!
|
|
(mogel) girl ask me for sex - I say "N0 WAY!@# I MUZT H4V BJ0RK!@"
|
|
(mogel) I told you, asshole. squid.
|
|
(mogel) what are you some kind of retard?
|
|
(mogel) huh?
|
|
(mogel) what the hell is your problem, moron?
|
|
(mogel) huh?
|
|
> that is not the question
|
|
(mogel) you some kind of reject?
|
|
(mogel) HUH!@?#
|
|
> I asked you about the fact that she's a SIBERIAN TIGER
|
|
> she is not from Europe as most would think
|
|
(mogel) Bjork r0x mah werld.
|
|
(mogel) enough said.
|
|
> H0W DEW YEW LYKE DEM APPLEZ?@#!?@#
|
|
(mogel) next question, brain-child.
|
|
> so, are you saying that you are into 'bestiality'?
|
|
(mogel) no.
|
|
(mogel) although the occasional squid-suck is nice.
|
|
> yes, whatever, scum sucker.
|
|
(mogel) listen asswipe.
|
|
(mogel) just get on with the interview.
|
|
(mogel) you're too slow, idiot.
|
|
> is it true that you want to move out to California and start up an
|
|
internet server called 'deadpupppies.com' with a 'pip the angry youth'
|
|
(mogel) (no comment)
|
|
> so you are not denying that?
|
|
(mogel) that's classified. sorry.
|
|
(mogel) zine-patrol.
|
|
> this wont' be the last you'll hear about this...
|
|
> what comes into your mind when I say "big time sensuality'?
|
|
(mogel) some wonderful ideal girlee with a great smile and a great wit
|
|
and is sex-ee and has a big squid on her head.
|
|
> do you realize that she's already MARRIED?@#?@#
|
|
> well???
|
|
> hello Mr. mogel?
|
|
(mogel) you mock me.
|
|
(mogel) die.
|
|
> I donut mock you.
|
|
(mogel) yew do, duncan donuts.
|
|
> I just ask you straight forward questions that you cannot seem to
|
|
answer
|
|
> HEY!
|
|
> let's not get into name calling...
|
|
> MICHAEL MICHAEL MOTORCYCLE, TURN THE KEY AND WATCH HIM PEE!
|
|
(mogel) gasp!
|
|
> ha!
|
|
> there!
|
|
> you said it! gasp! the best mag in the world!
|
|
> do you notice when people are astonished, they don't say 'hoe?'
|
|
(mogel) well - at least some girl didn't turn into a lesbian after she went
|
|
out with me!
|
|
> hey!
|
|
> I converted her back!
|
|
> this interview is not about me!
|
|
> it's about you!
|
|
(mogel) haha
|
|
(mogel) people use hoe's all the time. it's a wonderful commoncy.
|
|
> for the record, boys and girls, my ex g/f dyked out before we went
|
|
out, I found out after we went out... and I had sex while we were going
|
|
out with her... so I turned her back.
|
|
(mogel) indeed.
|
|
> but, as you said... they USE them...
|
|
(mogel) "likes girls - likes pip"
|
|
> they don't FEEL them
|
|
> HEY!
|
|
(mogel) no way.
|
|
(mogel) people feel hoes a lot, too.
|
|
> hahahah
|
|
> you are very amusing Michael.
|
|
(mogel) indeed.
|
|
> now tell me about d2o...
|
|
> where do you see it going?
|
|
(mogel) (insert witty retort about "up" here) oh. I think dto will
|
|
only get super big.
|
|
(mogel) we're gonna plug the hell out of it.
|
|
(mogel) we're gonna make it famous all over the 'puter world.
|
|
(mogel) we'll appear on geraldo.
|
|
(mogel) see, although dto claims to have ideals of spreading people's free
|
|
opinions on any issue in the 'zine, we actually just want to make a
|
|
bundle of money and be famous from dto.
|
|
(mogel) so we will.
|
|
(mogel) one day you'll see mogel and bf on teevee and say "I talked to
|
|
him on irc d00d@!#"
|
|
> and how do you plan on doing this?
|
|
(mogel) ahem.
|
|
> I don't think so
|
|
> I plan on being very very rich and owning a TV station where you
|
|
produce my shows
|
|
(bF) answer him mogel!
|
|
(bF) don't be a hoseboy
|
|
(mogel) well, it's a very special plan.
|
|
(mogel) some of it is classified.
|
|
(mogel) I'll give you the "public" version.
|
|
(mogel) ahem.
|
|
(mogel) we plan to put out roughly ten issues of high-quality stuff.
|
|
very ground setting.
|
|
(mogel) then we're going to slowly move into massive plugging
|
|
advertising and attention getters. we'll have a real telnet, mailing
|
|
list, maybe usenet group set up at that point.
|
|
(mogel) next we're going to pull real-life publicity stunts.
|
|
(mogel) to get media attention.
|
|
(mogel) eventually we'll pull in lots of writers from all over.
|
|
(mogel) excuse me.
|
|
(mogel) I'm not done.
|
|
(mogel) then we're going to start putting slow "controversial" things
|
|
into the 'zine.
|
|
(bF) mog: pip is lagged...
|
|
(mogel) this will nab us attention and soon we'll be on geraldo.
|
|
(mogel) I have to make fun of that man's hair on TV once in my life.
|
|
(mogel) I just gotta.
|
|
> no I am no longer lagged... thank you though bf
|
|
(mogel) then from there it's newspapers, TV, and attention.
|
|
(mogel) money will come.
|
|
(mogel) fame will come.
|
|
> sounds like a dastardly plan...
|
|
(mogel) we'll ride on the recent "INFORMATION SUPER HIGHWAY" media
|
|
hype.
|
|
(mogel) well, that's it. of course there are more "questionable" means
|
|
we're going to use.
|
|
(mogel) but that's top secret.
|
|
(mogel) hush hush.
|
|
> mogel: and how would someone go about obtaining that information?
|
|
> and who is privy to that information?
|
|
(mogel) the top secret info? only me, eerie, bf, murmur and shadow tao
|
|
know the "dark" half of the dto manifesto.
|
|
(mogel) no one else on the planet knows.
|
|
> would I have been privy to that information if I decided to write for
|
|
d2o?
|
|
> or was I just going to be a mindless lackey?
|
|
(mogel) you're a writer. you contribute to the dto cause in the best
|
|
way, of course.
|
|
> I was going to be a no-body... pip the angry youth, zine writer
|
|
extrodinaire... just a nothing....
|
|
(mogel) the dto cause = style and realness.
|
|
> so what you are saying is that d2o doesn't regard their writers as
|
|
anything more than just pulp on which to build themselves up on top of
|
|
(mogel) oh yes.
|
|
> I really should spell check this before I release it as idciyrt
|
|
(mogel) well, if we feel a writer is truly special we can enlighten
|
|
them on more of the powers that be.
|
|
(mogel) yep.
|
|
> I see... and with that, I must go... it was a pleasure interviewing
|
|
you, but one or two more questions please...
|
|
> 1: why did you let me interview you instead of edi?
|
|
> and 2: do you know where the tarantula lives?
|
|
(mogel) I don't know. I'm tired. actually, I had better answers when
|
|
edi started to interview me back in time.
|
|
(mogel) Hawaii.
|
|
(mogel) I learned that on the brady bunch special.
|
|
> and with that, I'd like to wish our readers a good night.
|
|
|
|
and he left with this comment...
|
|
|
|
- mogel has quit IRC (SMEWCH PIP L0V)
|
|
|
|
/\__/\ ---------------------------------.
|
|
( #@ ) eND oF eLYTE m0GEL iNTUH'vIEW!@# |
|
|
|..| ----------------------------------'
|
|
~~
|
|
save a plant, eat a cow
|
|
|
|
i don't understand why vegitarians are the way they are, how
|
|
they can be so hypocritical as to point a finger at us and
|
|
say "murderer!" when we pick up a big mac, and then they go
|
|
out and 'save a tree' by using their brand spankin
|
|
new canvas bags to go home and eat a salad. i say save a
|
|
plant, eat a cow. i _refuse_ to follow the crowd and eat a
|
|
salad with my dinner, no sir-ree bobie for me... i think i
|
|
shall never eat a plant again in my life. i am now a carnivor
|
|
straight through.
|
|
|
|
fuck that, i'll go out and eat a vegitarian. roast them over
|
|
an open flame, smoke them in a hut and make jimmy dean sausages
|
|
out of them. eat the marrow from their bones, use their leathered
|
|
flesh for clothing, give a bone to my dog named killer, then use
|
|
their bodies to feed the plants in my back yard that i refuse to
|
|
eat. hell, i should just use my garden as bait for future
|
|
vegitarians to fall into my traps. all this talk of eating
|
|
vegitarians is making me hungry...
|
|
|
|
|
|
don't eat me! i'm just a harmless cow-thing...
|
|
/
|
|
/\__/\ ---------------------.
|
|
( %o ) idciyrt divider line |
|
|
|..| ----------------------'
|
|
~~
|
|
don't hate me because i'm ugleeee
|
|
|
|
i've been having netsex with this guy from spain for about 5 minutes
|
|
posing as a woman with the name of BigTits. i asked him if he wanted
|
|
me for my mind or my large breasts... he said it was my breasts... so i
|
|
tried to p
|
|
ersuade him into loving me for my mind...
|
|
|
|
> hmmm... is there anything i can do to persuade you?
|
|
(MSG from JOI) are you hot?
|
|
(MSG from JOI) no
|
|
> how about if i crack open my skull and rub my brain all over you
|
|
(MSG from JOI) :)
|
|
> would that get you hot?
|
|
> oh yeah, i'm pretty hot
|
|
> gassy too
|
|
> ate a bunch of beans before i went on the computer
|
|
> are you hot?
|
|
(MSG from JOI) put your tits in the computer
|
|
(MSG from JOI) yes
|
|
> they're up on teh screen big boy... rub me... my nipples are _so_
|
|
cold
|
|
> now i'm shoving a crowbar up inside of me... it's so cold... so
|
|
hard... oh yeah...
|
|
(MSG from JOI) take my cock
|
|
> how can i not?
|
|
> it's so big! and hard!
|
|
> but not as large as my crowbar... but i bet i can fix that
|
|
(MSG from JOI) yeah
|
|
> how about if we stick your dick into a vaccum cleaner and sucked it
|
|
longer?
|
|
> what if i straddle a washing machine while you hit me with a baseball
|
|
bat? would you like that?
|
|
(MSG from JOI) yes
|
|
> i can coach youlike they do the kids at little league games, "good
|
|
eye, good eye..."
|
|
> don't you have anything else to say than just 'yes?'
|
|
(MSG from JOI) i eat your tits.
|
|
> you 'eat my tits'?
|
|
> is that all?@!#?
|
|
(MSG from JOI) im very occupated
|
|
> say something like "i sautee your flamboyant breasts with a bit of
|
|
fettuchini sauce'
|
|
> that'd get me hot if someone said that to me
|
|
> occupied? doing what?
|
|
> are you having sex with heavy equipment like i am?
|
|
(MSG from JOI) hehehehehehehe
|
|
> i'm thinking about going out back and using that forklift i've been
|
|
saving for oh so long...
|
|
(MSG from JOI) yeah....ummmmmmm
|
|
|
|
- JOI is realJOI!@term31.aiind.upv.es (real)
|
|
- on channels: #teensex
|
|
- on irc via server scott.uab.es ([UAB] Univ. Autonoma Barcelona)
|
|
|
|
> .es? what country is that, big boy?
|
|
> spain?
|
|
(MSG from JOI) spain
|
|
> espaniol?
|
|
(MSG from JOI) yes
|
|
> wow, i love foreign men
|
|
(MSG from JOI) and u?
|
|
> i'm from the us of a
|
|
(MSG from JOI) ok
|
|
(MSG from JOI) i put my big cock in your mouth
|
|
> oh...your cock is just SO large...
|
|
> but... i can't breathe with something so big in my mouth
|
|
(MSG from JOI) yeah
|
|
> i'm starting to gag...
|
|
> ack ack ack...
|
|
(MSG from JOI) lick it
|
|
> i vomit all over your chest and cock...
|
|
(MSG from JOI) i fuck you with my dirty cock
|
|
> oh, the chunks from your penis feels so nice against my clit... oh
|
|
yes!
|
|
(MSG from JOI) you are very pig,ummm
|
|
> we're having sex on a far away beach in the middle of the day... it's
|
|
very sunny...
|
|
> so the vomit begins to stink...
|
|
> while we are kissing, the vomit's smell gets to me... so i vomit down
|
|
your throat and it chokes you to death....
|
|
> the end.
|
|
> go away before i taunt you a second time.
|
|
|
|
|
|
it's high noon on my sun dial...
|
|
/
|
|
/\__/\ --------------------------------------------.
|
|
( *o ) semi-official licensed idciyrt divider line |
|
|
|..| ---------------------------------------------'
|
|
~~
|
|
|
|
ode to my armpits
|
|
|
|
oh sweaty armpit, how I love thee
|
|
you smell better than a summer's breeze
|
|
you're so slippery and shiny in the sun
|
|
i can show you off just for some fun
|
|
|
|
wow, just about as touching as a sledgehammer to the gut.
|
|
/
|
|
/\__/\ -----------------.
|
|
( OO ) mr. divider line |
|
|
|..| ------------------'
|
|
~~
|
|
|
|
that about wraps it up for this installment of idciyrt,
|
|
look for furthur installments of our lovely magazine.
|
|
|
|
|
|
ZZZzzz...
|
|
/
|
|
.- <\__/\ ---------------------------------------------- /\__/\ -.
|
|
|X ( uu ) XXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXX ( OO ) X|
|
|
`-- |..| ------------.------------------------.---------- |..| --'
|
|
~~ | information on idciyrt | ~~
|
|
`------------------------'
|
|
|
|
.- /\__/\ ----------------------.
|
|
| ( oo ) who writes this shit? |
|
|
`-- |..| -----------------------'
|
|
~~
|
|
pip2 the angry youth - he's just this guy, you know?
|
|
|
|
.- /|__/\ -----------------------.
|
|
| ( o+ ) where can i reach you? |
|
|
`- |..| ------------------------'
|
|
~~
|
|
you can email pip2 at his current email address of
|
|
tmacse@ix.netcom.com with whatever you feel nessesary.
|
|
|
|
.- !\__/\ --------------------------.
|
|
| ( __ ) where can i find idciyrt? |
|
|
`-- |..| ---------------------------'
|
|
~~
|
|
if someone remembers to put it there, and the sysadmin finds it, you
|
|
can probably find it on ftp.fc.net in the /pub/deadkat/? directory.
|
|
|
|
.- /\__/\ ------------------------- /\__/\ -.
|
|
| ( %% ) end of informational file ( ,, ) |
|
|
`-- |..| --------------------------- |..| --'
|
|
~~ ~~
|
|
"we're the people your mother forgot to warn you about"
|
|
|
|
-eof-
|
|
|