177 lines
10 KiB
Plaintext
177 lines
10 KiB
Plaintext
,...
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$$$"""""" " """" $$$$$$ "T&$bxxd$&P" "T&$bxx$$$$$' " """"""$$$
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""" """""" """
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ggg "Choosing Where To Sit In Class" ggg
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$$$ by Mogel $$$
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$$$ $$$
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$$$ [ HOE E-Zine #939 -- 12/05/99 -- http://www.hoe.nu ] .,$$$
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`"""""""""""""""""""""""""""""""""""""""""""""""""""""""""""""""""""""""'
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Quite often we give little active thought towards selecting where
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to sit within an average high school or college classroom seating
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arrangement. This is certainly normal. If you do think about it,
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however, there's a certain strategy or logic behind most seating choices.
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Sometimes these choices are very passive, and we're unaware of them. I'm
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still certain, however, that where we choose to sit does give a certain
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"message" to the teacher involved, and being aware of that message--or
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being aware of the decisions of your fellow classmates, may come to your
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advantage at some point in time. In addition, sitting in various
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positions in the class fit certain archetypes and qualities related to
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human psychology.
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The most common seating arrangements vary between 5 and 6 columns
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and/or 5 or 6 rows. Rather than being incredibly redundant, and
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discussing each of the possible variations, I'm going to create a compact
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"5x5" model which can be applied to virtually any other standard
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arrangement.
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The Seating Model -- 5 Rows, 5 Columns
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======================================
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[Teacher is here.]
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.----------------------------.
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| A1 A2 A3 A4 A5 |
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| B1 B2 B3 B4 B5 |
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| C1 C2 C3 C4 C5 |
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| D1 D2 D3 D4 D5 |
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| E1 E2 E3 E4 E5 |
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`----------------------------'
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This model assumes that all 25 positions here will eventually be
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taken up. The emptiness or fullness of one position might affect a
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students decision as to where he sits, so one must be careful not to
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assume too much too quickly. It's best to use this model AFTER either
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(1) a student establishes either a clear pattern for sitting in one
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particular position type, or (2) when given a virtually empty room, a
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student leans towards sitting in one a particular location. If a student
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does exhibits a clear pattern, we can make quite a number of comments
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about the typical positions of students within the class. The following
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are some of the most obvious.
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- All 5 positions of "E" we will call "The Bad Kids". The
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significance of this position is usually the message intended
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for the teacher. If you sit in the back, it's generally
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understood that you're not interested in participating in the
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class. Teachers generally are standing up front, so, basically,
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you're telling your professor "I want to be as far away from you
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as the limitations of this classroom will possibly allow for."
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It's a very actively stand-offish.
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- All 5 positions of "A" we will call lovingly call "The Nerds".
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This position, as opposed to "The Bad Kids", gives off the
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message to a professor: "I care about this class! I care
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about learning! I want to be as close to you as I can! I am an
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active agent and participant here! You're going to see me FIRST
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when you look out into that vast sea of faceless students, and
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I'll be there for you!" As you might detect, although
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academically positive, both teachers (and more often) students
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are both aware that this position of seating is also the "Suck
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Up" position. It's extending just a little too much effort. Not
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that effort is bad, of course, but sitting in the front row
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generally has a stigma. That sigma, good or bad, still exists.
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Any student that chooses to sit in a Nerd position is making an
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active choice to give a message to a teacher. Position "A3" is
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generally the Super Nerd position.
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- Less often, but commonly, all 5 positions of "C" are designated
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for the Invisible Students. These are students who seem to be
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choosing to sit in the middle of the class a bit too actively.
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In actuality, students that choose to be Invisible are quite
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often doing what the Bad Kids *think* they're doing far more
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effectively--that is, hiding from the teacher and trying not to
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be noticed. Teachers are always aware of the bad kids, because
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of the blatantness of their choice in seating, but Invisible
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kids give off more of a superficial image of "caring" about the
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class, so they don't get watched quite as actively. Position C3
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is the worst choice you can make as an invisible student since
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this is the actual physical center of the class, and it's just
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inevitable that a teacher will eventually look to see what's
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going on in the center. It's only natural.
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- All of the "1" and "5" positions on the most right and left
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sides of the class are classically called the Cynic positions.
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These are students who are disinterested in the class, but make
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less effort than the Bad Kids to inform the teacher of it.
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Instead, they sit in a position that's on the remote outskirts
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of the class, the sides. Not always, but commonly, the classic
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Cynic kid will not really feel like they're "part" of the class,
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which gives them special rights, privileges, and powers that
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other students in the class wouldn't have quite as naturally.
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For example, these students are allowed to make very rude
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commentary regarding the events of the class. They are also
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allowed to talk to other students around them with less
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immediate attention.
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- All the "B" and "D" positions are generally 'tweeners. These
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are people that are leaning towards either "A" or "E", but try
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not to make a point of being any one position too clearly. These
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are probably the two least offensive rows to sit in.
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As you may have deduced, there are people who do exhibit *mixed*
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characteristics from different types of students, or special positions
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worthy of noting. The following are some of the mixes, which look eerily
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like categories you might find in a role-playing game.
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- Position "A1" and "A5" are the "Nerd-Cynics". These are
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students that are generally Nerdy, but still want to the special
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rights and privileges that cynic students seem to have.
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- Position "E1" and "E5" are the "Bad-Cynics". This is the
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deepest, most baddy-bad position in the class. Not only are you
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putting up a big flag to the teacher saying "I don't care", but
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you also get the special rights and privileges that the cynic
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students seem to have. These students can be also called the
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"Will Probably Drop Out" students.
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- Position "C1" and "C5" are the "Invisible-Cynics". As to be
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expected, these students have the special powers that Cynics
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seem to have, but they're a more conservative type of Cynic that
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prefers to hide their cynical nature from the world and whisper
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their comments (or pass notes for those of you in high school).
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- Position "D2" and "D4" are generally the Gimp Positions. These
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are students who generally don't have any clear identity and are
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probably not very helpful or interesting. They are not
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offensive positions in any way, but these students often
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exhibits minor traits of both the Invisible kids and the Bad
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kids. This mixture often creates a very annoying and passive
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type of person.
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- Position "B2" and "B4" are what *I* consider to the the Ideal
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Positions in the classroom. These students are letting the
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teacher know that they care about the class (which can't really
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HURT since being in a class should be why you're THERE), but
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it's not too over-the-top, like the Nerd kids. They are a bit
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faded out, like the Invisible kids, but this usually creates a
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more "un-offensive" aura as opposed to a "I'm-just-blending-in"
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aura. Incidentally, "B3" is not an ideal position because I
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think that it's *too* ideal of a position, which makes it fall
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into a special class I call the Sub-Nerd--someone who would
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probably sit in the Nerd position but is probably too shy.
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As I mentioned above, the classroom model I'm using here is the
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most compact of the models. There's obviously situations with far more
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rows and columns. Some of the same rules do apply, but the gradiations
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of subtlety are more in effect within those larger models.
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The most disturbing thing about this model, more than the fact
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that it exists, is that the process of thinking this up in the middle of
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one of my classes was *far* more interesting and entertaining than the
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class itself. And you may find this true, too, one day... when you're
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sitting in one of your own boring classes, and peering out into the room
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of students, and thinking about the seating choices they've made... and
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how these seating arrangement suggest information about the students
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psychology, and how interesting that might be compared to the class
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you're in itself.
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Doesn't it suck?
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[--------------------------------------------------------------------------]
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[ (c) !LA HOE REVOLUCION PRESS! HOE #939, BY MOGEL - 12/05/99 ]
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