113 lines
5.3 KiB
Plaintext
113 lines
5.3 KiB
Plaintext
,...
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$$$$
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$$$$T""P$$$ba, ,gd&P""T&bg. ,gd&P""T&bg.
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ggggggggggg $$$$ $$$$$b d$$$$ $$$$b d$$$$ $$$$$b ggggggggggg
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""""""""""" $$$$ $$$$$$ $$$$$ $$$$$ $$$$$bxxP&$$&P """""""""""
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$$$$ $$$$$$ T$$$$ $$$$P T$$$$
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$$$"""""" " """" $$$$$$ "T&$bxxd$&P" "T&$bxx$$$$$' " """"""$$$
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""" """""" """
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ggg "Revival In My Panties!" ggg
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$$$ by - CannibalButterfly $$$
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$$$ $$$
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$$$ [ HOE E-Zine #936 -- 12/05/99 -- http://www.hoe.nu ] .,$$$
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`"""""""""""""""""""""""""""""""""""""""""""""""""""""""""""""""""""""""'
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"Dude, Has anyone ever wondered if rain is just Jesus blowing a
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serious load, duuuuude?"
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He spreads my legs and slowly enters my holy church. I am his
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Mary, but no longer a virgin. Pulsating me deeper and deeper until we
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melt into each other. I yearn to scream and let it all out, but words
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wont come to my lips. What should I say? My eyes roll to the back of my
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head and I freeze.
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I was recently invited to the hottest party of the year. Should I
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go? Should I stay? Tough choice, especially since T.G.I.F is on the same
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night. Egad! What shall a girl do? Boy Meets World? Girls just wanna have
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fun? Boy Meets World? Girls just wanna have fun? Okay, okay. Cyndi Lauper
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talked me into it. Fiesta!
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I ran out the door and hopped on my beach cruiser. I'm one bad
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mofo when I'm traveling in style! I immediately pedaled over to the newly
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remodeled Big K-Mart. I needed a kickin' outfit for what was going to be
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the most exciting night of my life. I ran to the plus size department and
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picked out a slammin' pair of Kathy Lee jeans. They were painted on and
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my ass was bumpin. I still needed a shirt, but there wasn't enough time
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to pick one out. I didn't think the day would ever come, but it did. I
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was going to resort to my emergency clothing source, a pack of Hanes her
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Way t-shirts that I hid away in the chimney for a special occasion like
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this. I'm going to be all that and a reduced fat can of Pringles!
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After checking out and paying with my foods tamp credit card, I
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rushed home. It was time to beautify! I combed the nap out of my afro and
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douched. Damn, I was already looking pretty as a peach. I then got
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together my outfit and put on my Reebok high-tops. Finally, I licked my
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index finger and gently placed it on my right butt cheek. -sizzle sizzle-
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I'm definitely going to be the Belle of the Ball!
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The clock striked 8 and it was time for me to saddle up on my
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beach cruiser again and head over to the affair. I got lost a few times,
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but I finally arrived at the gates around 9. Two angels were at guard and
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checking invitations. Err...of all the luck! No one told me this was a
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costume party!
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The get together was a blast, but all they had was bread and red
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wine. They sure skipped out on making it a fancy event!
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Anyways, in a few short hours, I was guzzling away and drunk as a
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skunk. Clouds consumed me and electric jolts flew through my soul. Next
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thing I knew I was in a bed with a man I don't even remember meeting. His
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heavy breath was blowing in my ears while his body weight crushed me.
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Throbbing and heavenly. My lips quivered and I began to scream
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in pleasure.
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"Oh God, Oh God, OHHH GOD!!"
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He suddenly pushed himself off of me and threw his wife beater
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back on. He lit a cigarette and began puffing away.
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"So, you've been with my father, too!?"
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"Huh? I've never been with your dad. What are you talking about?"
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"Then why did you call out his name? To make some sort of demented
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joke?"
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I sat there in silence. Trembling in the darkness wondering how to
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respond. What in the world is this man talking about?? If God is
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supposedly his dad then he must be Jesus. Wow, I'm obviously
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hallucinating! But what if he is actually Jesus? Should I get on my knees
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and give him head or should I get on my knees and repent?? It would be a
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sin to not do what he asks of me, but so would giving him a piece of the
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booty without being married. I'll never win!
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The room was quiet except for Jesus mumbling under his breath. I
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couldn't make out everything he said, but the asshole had enough nerve to
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accuse me of sleeping with Jonah and Moses!
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After an hour of silence, he grabbed at his crotch and took the
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last drag of another cigarette.
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"Come drink of my fountain and make me weep bitch."
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I was shocked, but immediately crawled his way and began bouncing
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to his beat.
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"HALLELUJAH!"
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Minutes later, Jesus came in my eyes and mouth. He then forced me
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to sing 'Amazing Grace' while gargling the cum. He wiped the sticky mess
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off with cheap one-ply toilet paper and even scraped the dried up crust
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off my eyelashes. Holy Swedish meat balls BatMan, it's true! Jesus does
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make the blind see again!
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Anyhoot, we quickly fell asleep in each other's arms and slept the
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night away. I was finally woken up by Jesus yanking me by the hair. He
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passionately looked me in my eyes and said....
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"PSYCH, MY NAME IS BOB! HAHAHA"
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[--------------------------------------------------------------------------]
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[ (c) !LA HOE REVOLUCION PRESS! HOE #936 - BY CANNIBALBUTTERFLY - 12/05/99 ]
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