67 lines
3.2 KiB
Plaintext
67 lines
3.2 KiB
Plaintext
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ooooo ooooo .oooooo. oooooooooooo HOE E'ZINE RELEASE #562
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`888' `888' d8P' `Y8b `888' `8
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888 888 888 888 888 "Friends"
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888ooooo888 888 888 888oooo8
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888 888 888 888 888 " by Phairgirl
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888 888 `88b d88' 888 o 4/11/99
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o888o o888o `Y8bood8P' o888ooooood8
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A friend is someone who is there for you when you have problems.
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A friend is someone who listens.
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A friend is someone who calms you down when you're upset.
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A friend is someone you spend time and have fun with.
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Blah, blah, blah. What kind of fairy tale bullshit is that?
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I've had many *friends*, ever since I can remember communicating
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with people. My friends ranged from Rhonda and Amy, who gave me lice a
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bunch of times, to Kelly who moved away to California, to Terri who chose
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her other friends over me, to Wendy who wouldn't stop BUGGING me, to
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Heidi, who stole a bunch of my stuff, to Jenny, who was a messed up
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psycho, to Charity, who fucked my boyfriend and almost left me homeless
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and still owes me a ton of money.
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Needless to say, I don't like having friends.
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However, it is necessary to socialize and have fun and generally
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keep a decent peace of mind, or risk complete and total insanity. This
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brings me to my current set of friends, whose names I will NOT say,
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because I still count them as my friends, even though some are about to
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go the way of Rhonda and Amy.
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Friend #1: Met over the Internet. Dated for a bit, but then decided
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to be just friends. Met in person, did the sex thing. Went back to being
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just friends. Now tells me all the shit his girlfriend talks about me
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behind my back, then yells at me for calling her on it.
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Friend #2: Lent him money for rent. Got him a job when he was
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desperate, then acted like a complete fuck-up and general ass until (thank
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goodness) he got fired. Tells me he'll pay me back *someday*, then asks
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me if he can borrow *more* money. Now hangs out with the crowd he was
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trying to get away from by hanging around with me, and acts like a
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jackass.
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Friend #3: Owes me money. Asks for asinine favors sometimes (and
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drives me up the wall in general, although not always in a bad way). Is
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turning into a major pothead and alienating his closest friends in the
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process by ditching them for the wacky weed, doesn't call, doesn't e-mail.
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Treading on thin ice at this point.
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Friend #4: Tells a lot of stupid lies for no reason. Drives me up
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the wall, but she's a total sweetheart. On the worst day I've had at work
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in months, she invites me to a hot tub party. THIS IS THE BEST I CAN DO.
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And people wonder why I have four cats and am always online
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fiendishly downloading mp3s and listening to music and watching anime and
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working as many hours a week as possible.
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Be my friend?
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[ (c) !LA HOE REVOLUCION PRESS! HOE #562 - WRITTEN BY: PHAIRGIRL - 4/11/99 ]
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