128 lines
4.0 KiB
Plaintext
128 lines
4.0 KiB
Plaintext
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'##::::'##:::'#####:::'########: VIVA LA REVOLUCION! CERDO DEL CAPITALISTA!!
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##:::: ##::'##.. ##:: ##.....:: ===========================================
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##:::: ##:'##:::: ##: ##::::::: THE HELOTS OF ECSTASY PRESS RELEASE #323 !!
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#########: ##:::: ##: ######::: ZIEGO VUANTAR SHALL BE MUCH VICTORIOUS! !!
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##.... ##: ##:::: ##: ##...:::: ===========================================
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##:::: ##:. ##:: ##:: ##::::::: "Bums & The Everlasting Search for God" !!
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##:::: ##::. #####::: ########: by -> The Jester !!
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..:::::..::::.....::::........:: 12/9/98 !!
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!!========================================================================!!
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1:00.
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fuck. i was late. i needed to get home.
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"hi."
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as i turned i noticed god. well, it was a bum really, but i was
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sure he was god. "hi... god?" i spoke, so happy to finally speak with
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the guy.
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"yes, my son, you have beckoned for me?" god asked.
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"well, yeah, but like, i called for you a lot, but i never
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expected you to come," i said.
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"well, i am quite the busy person, my child. what is it that
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troubles you?" god seemed understanding, i think this happens to him
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quite a bit.
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"ya see, er. like. well, where do i start. ok. so i was
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involved with a girl, and i started questioning life in general and--"
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"--and you wanted to know what the meaning of life is?" god was
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reading my mind. i could tell these sorts of things.
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"yeah. what *is* the meaning of life."
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come on a journey with me my son.
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wait, god, you're in my head now?
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yeah, so stop thinking or else.
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ok.
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do you see this cow my son? do you see how happy he is?
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yes, god, that's why i don't eat beef. i think its inhumane.
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well, start eating beef again, because it quite yummy and hey,
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it's only a cow.
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but god, aren't we supposed to love our fellow animals?
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do you want to see the meaning of life or not my son?
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well, yeah.
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do you see this american flag my son? do you understand what
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it stands for?
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yes, god, it stands for hypocrisy and hate and murder.
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no, it stands for truth and honesty, the american way.
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god, they lie to us...
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maybe i should stop this whole giving out the meaning of life
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thing.
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no! i am sorry god!@@!! continue, please.
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if you insist, my son.
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do you see the universe, my son?
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i see the universe. it is a vast expanse of atoms, subatomic
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particles, suns, moons, planets, animals, plants, and things unknown
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to us.
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no, my son. you just don't understand.
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well, fuck you, god. if you would give us a bigger fucking
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cerebellum then i just fucking might.
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i'm pissed, god. you suck. you are such an asshole. you don't
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understand human beings at all. i don't think you fucking created us.
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big bang starts all, fucker.
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my son, you are out of line--
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no god, *you* are fucking out of line. you don't exist. you are
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a figment of organized religion's imagination.
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son, you will stop...
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no god!@ die!!@!@#@!~
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damn.
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you are out of my head.
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"do you have any spare change, young sir?" the bum questioned.
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hm. checking my pockets. 2 pennies, 3 nickels and a quarter.
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a piece of lint. a lighter.
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"why, yes i do," i said as i pulled out my lighter and burnt
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the bum in the eye.
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"ah! that hurts!@!@ stop! i don't have medical insurance!@"
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he screamed.
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"die god!@@@!" i didn't even hear the police cars coming. i
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continued burning his eye.
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wow.
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playing out my angst on bums sure isn't fun.
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so, god, this text file is for you.
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die, fucker!
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!!========================================================================!!
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!! (c) !LA HOE REVOLUCION PRESS! #323 - WRITTEN BY: THE JESTER - 12/9/98 !!
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