372 lines
8.4 KiB
Plaintext
372 lines
8.4 KiB
Plaintext
ÚÄÄÄ¿ ÚÄÄÄ¿ ÚÄÄÄÄÄÄ¿
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ÚÙ À¿ ³ ÀÄÄÄÄÄÄ ³
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³ ÀÄ¿ ³ ÀÄÄÄÄ¿
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³ À¿ ÃÄÄÄÄ¿ ÀÄ¿
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³ ³ ³ ÀÄÄ À¿
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³ ³ ³ ÚÙ
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³ ÚÄÙ ³ ÄÄ¿ ÚÄÄÙ
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ÀÄÄÄÄÄÄÙ ³ ÀÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÙ
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Damned Fucking Shit
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Edited by Access Denied
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Issue #22
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Title: DFS #18 Revisited
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Date: 1/18/94
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By: Nosferatu
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¯¯¯¯¯¯¯¯¯¯¯¯¯¯¯¯¯¯¯¯¯¯¯¯¯¯¯¯¯¯¯¯¯¯¯¯¯¯¯¯¯¯¯¯¯¯¯¯¯¯¯¯¯¯¯¯¯¯¯¯¯¯¯¯¯¯¯¯¯¯¯¯¯¯¯¯¯¯¯
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[Editor's Note: Hmm... Nosferatu had some fun with this one. Here's DFS #18
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revisited... but a little bit differently. Read on... -AD]
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ÚÄÄÄ¿ ÚÄÄÄ¿ ÚÄÄÄÄÄÄ¿
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ÚÙ À¿ ³ ÀÄÄÄÄÄÄ ³
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³ ÀÄ¿ ³ ÀÄÄÄÄ¿
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³ À¿ ÃÄÄÄÄ¿ ÀÄ¿
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³ ³ ³ ÀÄÄ À¿
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³ ³ ³ ÚÙ
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³ ÚÄÙ ³ ÄÄ¿ ÚÄÄÙ
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ÀÄÄÄÄÄÄÙ ³ ÀÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÙ
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Damned Fuckin' Shit
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Edited by Access Denied
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Issue #18
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Title, dig dis: A Chat On Blurred Vision
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Date, dig dis: 1/14/94
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By, dig dis: Anonymous
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¯¯¯¯¯¯¯¯¯¯¯¯¯¯¯¯¯¯¯¯¯¯¯¯¯¯¯¯¯¯¯¯¯¯¯¯¯¯¯¯¯¯¯¯¯¯¯¯¯¯¯¯¯¯¯¯¯¯¯¯¯¯¯¯¯¯¯¯¯¯¯¯¯¯¯¯¯¯¯
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[Editor's Note, dig dis: Well, seein' dat dis wuz sent in anonymously, Ah can't
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in anyway verify de authenticity o' dis. So's if ya' be de sysop o' Blurred
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Vision and dis didn't really happen t' ya', oh well. What it is, Mama!
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Scribble sump'n about it and maybe I'll publish it. If dis DID happen dough,
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danks, some lot o' suckas gots'ta laugh. What it is, Mama! So's anyway, dis
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may gots happened, it may gots not. In any case, it's pretty funny. Ya'
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know? -AD]
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A Chat On Blurred Vision
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Dis chat wuz captured fum some board called Blurred Vision.
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De SysOp be some twit. Eyeball and ya' gots'ta see why. Ya' know?
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ÚÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄ THiS BULLETiN BOARD iS PRiVATE ÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄ¿
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ÀÄÄÄÄÄ iF YOU HAVE NOT BEEN iNViTED, HANGUP NOW ÄÄÄÄÙ
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ÄÄÄ Enta' yo' account dojigger o' numba'
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ÄÄÄ New users type NEW
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[þ LOGiN þ]: NEW
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Newusa' password, dig dis: ÛÛÛÛÛÛ
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Newusa' password, dig dis:
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%LF, (( XXXXX )) gots'ta buggered in t' chat..
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Identify yourself. What it is, Mama!
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***Straight t' de point.
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hold please
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Identify yourself. What it is, Mama!
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***A dude o' many words.
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Massa'
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Massa' whut?. Right On!
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Massa' Smith. What it is, Mama!
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WHere dun did ya' git dis #?
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War diala'
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Yeah. What it is, Mama!. how dun did ya' git de NUP?
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War diala'?
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Git lost ya' fuckwad before ah snatch drastic measures..
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***Oh no. Right On! Not dat. Right On!
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Whut be drastic measures?
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It means if ah find out who ya' be, ya' gots'ta not gots some reputashun in de
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mornin'.
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***Wow. Ya' know? Whut some scary guy. Right On!
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Ah duzn't gots one yet.
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Hang up.
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But why?
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Cuz ya' wuz not invited t' dis board. Sheeeiit.
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***No shit.
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How do Ah git invited?
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Fust o' all, ya' duzn't eyeball autoposts at MOSH
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How else?
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Git some fuckin' life. Sheeeiit..
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Why be ya' bein' so's mean?
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Becuase youse not supposed t' be here. Sheeeiit.
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But Ah dought it wuz fo' everyone?
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Ya' dought wrong. What it is, Mama!
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But I'm such some baaaad usa'...Ah gots tons o' files..
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Identify yourself. What it is, Mama!
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***Here we go again.
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Let's plum say I'm some baaaad usa'.
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Identify yourself. What it is, Mama!
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I've been informed t' de identity o' dis sucka' ya' be lookin' fo'.
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***He's lookin' fo' some Gath Baal guy o' some shit..
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***He wants t' kill him fo' some reason...
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Identify dat individual. What it is, Mama!
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Golf Ball o' sump'n.
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Identify his true identity. Ya' know?
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Whut gots'ta Ah git fo' it?
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Identify his true identity. Ya' know?
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His fust dojigger be Chris.
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Be dis sucka' Chris P$%@$?
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*** ^^^^ Fo' dis lamers sake, we'll protect his dojigger.
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Could be. Sheeeiit..
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Dank ya' fo' complyin'.
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No problem. What it is, Mama!
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Leave me. Sheeeiit.
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But, yo' presence enlightens me. Sheeeiit.
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Identify yourself. What it is, Mama!
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Sam. What it is, Mama!
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State yo' full identity. Ya' know?
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Yosemite Sam. What it is, Mama!
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Incorrect response. Sheeeiit.. State yo' Handle. Sheeeiit.
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Yosemete Sam. Right On!
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Incorrect response. Sheeeiit.. State yo' handle. Sheeeiit.
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Whatchamacalit.
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Ah know who ya' be. If ya' persist, ya' gots'ta be 'secuted. Sheeeiit.
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***Death by drool? :)
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Den if ya' know who Ah am, why do ya' keep askin' me?
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Ya' be N#@#@#@#@.
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***We'll protect his identity too..
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Yep.
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Ya' be not welcome here. Sheeeiit.
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But I'm some baaaad usa'.
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Ya' be not one o' de chosen.
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But it be mah destiny. Ya' know?
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Alex says t' go away. Ya' know?
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Alex who?
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Alex J#@#@#.
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***And his..
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Dat's me. Sheeeiit.
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Ya' honky jive likes some dog. What it is, Mama!
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Dog's duzn't honky jive, dey lay. Ya' know?
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Leave me. Sheeeiit.
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Likes some tree?
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Leave me. Sheeeiit.. o' ya' gots'ta suffa'.
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Suffa' whut?
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De consequences.
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Whut wuz dose again?
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Death by means o' Blacklisture. Sheeeiit.
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Blacklisture?
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Yes.
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Could ya' define dat fo' me?
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De ruinin' o' an individuals "BBS" life. Sheeeiit.
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But, accordin' t' ya', Ah duzn't gots one. Sheeeiit.
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Den ya' gots nothin' t' worry about. Leave me. Sheeeiit.
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If Ah gots nothin' t' worry about, why duzn't ya' let me on?
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A'cuz ya' do not gots de propa' New Usa' Password. Sheeeiit.
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So's fill me in.
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De New Usa' Password be "G"
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No it's not.
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Ok. What it is, Mama!. ah lied. Sheeeiit.. it's Crtl-Alt-Del. What it is,
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Mama!.
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Be dat wid de dashes?
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no.. hist Crtl, den Alt, den Del. What it is, Mama!. (Hold dem all down real
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tight)
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On mah keyboard?
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Yes.
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Ah duzn't gots some Ctrl key. Ya' know?..plum little Apples.
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***Heh heh
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Uhh. What it is, Mama!. git out o' mah fuckin' face. Sheeeiit.
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Ah am supposed t' tell ya' Ah gots access on de best board in de AC.
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Whut board would dat be?
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P$^!#^*& L&!@.
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***Don't wants t' git sued, ya' know. Ya' know?
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Identify yo' handle on P@$%$?&% L^&@.
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N#^#@ M%&@!#.
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Ya' be not N#^#@ M%&@!#. N^@$^ M%!*#^ duz not currently reside in de 414.
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Yes Ah do.
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C!$&$. Right On!, leave now. Ya' know?
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Dis be not C#%$%&
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If ya' duzn't leave now, i'll be forced t' use *69.
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Isn't dat some little personal? Ah plum met ya'.
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Git off dis carria'. Hang up.
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What's some carria'?
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Leave me. Sheeeiit.
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Who do ya' dink dis be?
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<hold><now callin' yo' residence><XXX-XXXX>
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Wrong. What it is, Mama!.mah phone isn't ringin'..
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<please wait>
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Well?
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Ya' be not N!^!$%&*. Right On!. Identify Yourself. What it is, Mama!
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B@# D#@#.
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Big Honky jive. Identify Yourself. What it is, Mama!
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Z@#@#@.
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Incorrect Response. Sheeeiit.
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W#@.
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Whut be yo' full dojigger?
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Abdul Clamwacka'.
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Greetings Zach K!#$&~!@#.. How may help ya'?
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How mosey on down ya' keep deletin' me?
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Whut be yo' voice #?
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XXX-XXXX.
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Correct. Whut happened afta' ah left, dat one night.
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Whut night would dat be?
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De one when me and DW went t' Hammer's?
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We gots laid. Sheeeiit.
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Incorrect Response. Sheeeiit. Try Again.
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We gots drunk. What it is, Mama!
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One more guess. Dan ya' gots'ta be cut off. What it is, Mama!
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Fum whut?
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Dis carria'.
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Ya' still ain't told me whut some carria' be.
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Ya' be dumb. Sheeeiit. Figure it out.
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How?
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Git some life. Sheeeiit.
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Where?
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Forget it.. goodbye
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NO CARRIER
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***What some supa' fine guy, eh?
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Find DFS On These Fine Systems
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=========================================================
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| Paradise Lost - +1.414.476.3181 |
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| Ti - (Private) |
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| Realms of Decadence - +1.216.671.0078,,t66 |
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| Plan 9 Information Archives - +1.716.881.FONE (3663) |
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| AE - Plan 9 Information Archives - Login: DFS |
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| FTP - etext.archive.umich.edu - pub/Zines/DFS |
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| To submit, call Paradise Lost and log on as DFS. The |
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| password is JINGLE JINGLE. |
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=========================================================
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