349 lines
6.4 KiB
Plaintext
349 lines
6.4 KiB
Plaintext
ÚÄÄÄ¿ ÚÄÄÄ¿ ÚÄÄÄÄÄÄ¿
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ÚÙ À¿ ³ ÀÄÄÄÄÄÄ ³
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³ ÀÄ¿ ³ ÀÄÄÄÄ¿
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³ À¿ ÃÄÄÄÄ¿ ÀÄ¿
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³ ³ ³ ÀÄÄ À¿
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³ ³ ³ ÚÙ
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³ ÚÄÙ ³ ÄÄ¿ ÚÄÄÙ
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ÀÄÄÄÄÄÄÙ ³ ÀÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÙ
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Damned Fucking Shit
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Edited by Access Denied
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Issue #18
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Title: A Chat On Blurred Vision
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Date: 1/14/94
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By: Anonymous
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¯¯¯¯¯¯¯¯¯¯¯¯¯¯¯¯¯¯¯¯¯¯¯¯¯¯¯¯¯¯¯¯¯¯¯¯¯¯¯¯¯¯¯¯¯¯¯¯¯¯¯¯¯¯¯¯¯¯¯¯¯¯¯¯¯¯¯¯¯¯¯¯¯¯¯¯¯¯¯
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[Editor's Note: Well, seeing that this was sent in anonymously, I can't in
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anyway verify the authenticity of this. So if you are the sysop of Blurred
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Vision and this didn't really happen to you, oh well. Write something about
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it and maybe I'll publish it. If this DID happen though, thanks, a lot of
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people will laugh. So anyway, this may have happened, it may have not. In
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any case, it's pretty funny. -AD]
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A Chat On Blurred Vision
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This chat was captured from a board called Blurred Vision.
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The SysOp is a twit. Read and you will see why.
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ÚÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄ THiS BULLETiN BOARD iS PRiVATE ÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄ¿
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ÀÄÄÄÄÄ iF YOU HAVE NOT BEEN iNViTED, HANGUP NOW ÄÄÄÄÙ
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ÄÄÄ Enter your account name or number
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ÄÄÄ New users type NEW
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[þ LOGiN þ]: NEW
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Newuser password: ÛÛÛÛÛÛ
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Newuser password:
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%LF, (( XXXXX )) has broken in to chat..
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Identify yourself.
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***Straight to the point.
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hold please
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Identify yourself.
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***A man of many words.
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Bob
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Bob what?!
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Bob Smith.
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WHere did you get this #?
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War dialer
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Yeah.. how did you get the NUP?
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War dialer?
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Get lost you fuckwad before i take drastic measures..
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***Oh no! Not that!
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What is drastic measures?
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It means if i find out who you are, you will not have a reputation in the
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morning.
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***Wow. What a scary guy!
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I don't have one yet.
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Hang up.
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But why?
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Cuz you were not invited to this board.
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***No shit.
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How do I get invited?
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First of all, you don't read autoposts at MOSH
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How else?
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Get a fucking life..
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Why are you being so mean?
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Becuase you're not supposed to be here.
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But I thought it was for everyone?
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You thought wrong.
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But I'm such a good user...I have tons of files..
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Identify yourself.
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***Here we go again.
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Let's just say I'm a good user.
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Identify yourself.
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I've been informed to the identity of this person you are looking for.
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***He's looking for some Gath Baal guy or some shit..
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***He wants to kill him for some reason...
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Identify that individual.
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Golf Ball or something.
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Identify his true identity.
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What will I get for it?
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Identify his true identity.
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His first name is Chris.
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Is this person Chris P$%@$?
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*** ^^^^ For this lamers sake, we'll protect his name.
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Could be..
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Thank you for complying.
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No problem.
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Leave me.
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But, your presence enlightens me.
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Identify yourself.
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Sam.
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State your full identity.
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Yosemite Sam.
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Incorrect response.. State your Handle.
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Yosemete Sam!
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Incorrect response.. State your handle.
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Whatchamacalit.
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I know who you are. If you persist, you will be executed.
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***Death by drool? :)
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Then if you know who I am, why do you keep asking me?
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You are N#@#@#@#@.
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***We'll protect his identity too..
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Yep.
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You are not welcome here.
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But I'm a good user.
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You are not one of the chosen.
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But it is my destiny.
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Alex says to go away.
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Alex who?
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Alex J#@#@#.
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***And his..
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That's me.
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You lie like a dog.
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Dog's don't lie, they lay.
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Leave me.
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Like a tree?
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Leave me.. or you will suffer.
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Suffer what?
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The consequences.
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What were those again?
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Death by means of Blacklisture.
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Blacklisture?
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Yes.
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Could you define that for me?
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The ruining of an individuals "BBS" life.
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But, according to you, I don't have one.
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Then you have nothing to worry about. Leave me.
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If I have nothing to worry about, why don't you let me on?
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Because you do not have the proper New User Password.
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So fill me in.
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The New User Password is "G"
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No it's not.
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Ok.. i lied.. it's Crtl-Alt-Del..
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Is that with the dashes?
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no.. hist Crtl, then Alt, then Del.. (Hold them all down real tight)
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On my keyboard?
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Yes.
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I don't have a Ctrl key...just little Apples.
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***Heh heh
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Uhh.. get out of my fucking face.
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I am supposed to tell you I have access on the best board in the AC.
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What board would that be?
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P$^!#^*& L&!@.
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***Don't want to get sued, you know.
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Identify your handle on P@$%$?&% L^&@.
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N#^#@ M%&@!#.
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You are not N#^#@ M%&@!#. N^@$^ M%!*#^ does not currently reside in the 414.
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Yes I do.
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C!$&$!, leave now.
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This is not C#%$%&
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If you don't leave now, i'll be forced to use *69.
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Isn't that a little personal? I just met you.
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Get off this carrier. Hang up.
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What's a carrier?
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Leave me.
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Who do you think this is?
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<hold><now calling your residence><XXX-XXXX>
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Wrong..my phone isn't ringing..
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<please wait>
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Well?
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You are not N!^!$%&*!. Identify Yourself.
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B@# D#@#.
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Big Lie. Identify Yourself.
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Z@#@#@.
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Incorrect Response.
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W#@.
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What is your full name?
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Abdul Clamwacker.
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Greetings Zach K!#$&~!@#.. How may help you?
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How come you keep deleting me?
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What is your voice #?
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XXX-XXXX.
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Correct. What happened after i left, that one night.
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What night would that be?
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The one when me and DW went to Hammer's?
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We got laid.
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Incorrect Response. Try Again.
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We got drunk.
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One more guess. Than you will be cut off.
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From what?
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This carrier.
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You still haven't told me what a carrier is.
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You are dumb. Figure it out.
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How?
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Get a life.
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Where?
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Forget it.. goodbye
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NO CARRIER
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***What a nice guy, eh?
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Find DFS On These Fine Systems
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=========================================================
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| Paradise Lost - +1.414.476.3181 |
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| Ti - (Private) |
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| Realms of Decadence - +1.216.671.0078,,t66 |
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| Plan 9 Information Archives - +1.716.881.FONE (3663) |
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| AE - Plan 9 Information Archives - Login: DFS |
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| FTP - etext.archive.umich.edu - pub/Zines/DFS |
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| To submit, call Paradise Lost and log on as DFS. The |
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| password is JINGLE JINGLE. |
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=========================================================
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