textfiles/magazines/DFS/dfs014.txt

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                    Damned       Fucking        Shit
                        Edited by Access Denied

                              Issue #14
                      Title: Death of a BBSer
                      Date: 11/5/93
                      By: Access Denied
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                      Death of a BBSer

     The song from Mission: Impossible was playing in the
background.  Suddenly with a huge scratch of a record it stopped. 
Somebody started playing Fairlight (FAIRLIGH.MOD) in the background
and someone else's skin crawled.  A parrot's voice was heard, but
no one paid attention.  The random clicking of keys could be heard
in the background.  A dial tone, followed by some odd beeps and a
ringing sound could also be heard.  This was no ordinary gathering. 
It was nothing anybody could describe.  It was, in all senses,
DISGUSTING.
     Suddenly, a voice cried out "HAHHAHA LAMER BOY!"  The entire
crowd turned around and all the music and sound stopped.  Standing
in the doorway was none other than.... Oh... never mind.

     Well that was a boring story.... on to another....

     The day grew dark.... ahhh that sucked too.... lemme think...

     Ok.... I got one.

     A BBSer that many people hated sat in front of his computer. 
He called a BBS and read some messages.... suddenly he screamed out
"LAMER BOY!  I HATE LAMER BOY!  It is my life's destiny to UTTERLY
DESTROY LAMER BOY!!!!!!!"  Leaving a message lacking all forms of
maturity, the BBSer logged off the BBS with a sly grin.  Little did
he know what was in store for him.
     After logging off the BBS, he typed "CD \PORNO\BONDAGE\MEN". 
"Oh... Steve!  I can't wait to take a look at your handsome body!"
the BBSer cried!  But without a warning, his monitor exploded with
a huge bang.  When the smoke cleared, nothing was left of the
computer.
     There was, however, a grim reminder of what had just happened. 
The BBSer's limp body was slumped over the table on which the
computer had once stood.  The body was missing something however...
     Instead of a head and shoulders, the top of the body was a
mass of bloody, steaming, tissue, bones, and mucus.  The BBSer's
arms were strewn on both sides of him, his left pointer finger
still twitching from nervous reactions.  Blood spewed out of the
massive wound onto what was left of the former computer's keyboard.
     Blood and tan colored brains were splattered on the wall
behind the BBSer.  A chunk of his skull could be seen on the floor,
spinning in circles with a piece of brain still inside of it.  A
half-crushed eye ball could be seen hanging from the bookcase on
the wall, swinging back and forth.  After a few moments, it fell to
the ground, the entrails that were holding it up having torn.  A
part of the BBSer's tongue could be seen on the extra chair next to
the maimed body.  Bone fragments were strewn everywhere, and a
small nose was also on the ground.  It was a very interesting
predicament.

     Of course it must be realized that when a body loses major
parts, such as the head, the smell tends to be fairly repulsive. 
The repulsive odors of this headless body drifted outside onto the
street where people walking by were overcome.  Being a busy street,
the sight of people walking into oncoming traffic is something to
see.  One young woman walked straight out in front of an oncoming
semi.  The driver had no time to even see her, much less attempt to
stop.  Her limp body was torn in two by the force of the truck and
was thrown a few feet into a brick wall.
     She was still alive however, her face twitching in horror as
she saw her legs and lower body lying next to her, her intestines
strewn in front of her.
     The truck driver was in much worse shape though.  Hearing the
crunch of bones under his wheels, his slammed on his breaks.  They
locked though and the truck went skidding into a group of fifteen
school children.
     The driver, not wearing his seat belt, flew through the
windshield and into the wall of a building nearby.  His head was
nowhere to be seen after this.  However, there was an odd bulge in
his chest area.  Upon examination by the medical people, it was
found his partially flattened head had been pushed into his lung
cavity.  His spine tore down his right leg and out the back of his
knee.
     The semi plowed directly into the group of school children. 
Of the fifteen, only two survived.  One of these two was maimed for
life, his right arm bent into an unsightly shape, only two of his
fingers on his left hand were still in tact, and he was paralyzed
from the next down... what was left of his lower body actually. 
His legs were so torn apart that they had to be amputated.  The
other child was completely unharmed... physically.  Mentally he
suffered from uncontrollable fits of violence, finally killing
himself three years later.
     After it was finally over, small hands and other small severed
limbs could be seen strewn around the ground.  In all, 16 people
died.  The street was stained such a bright red from all the blood
that it had to be rebuilt.
     The city this happened in never recovered from this and total
anarchy broke out.  The US government decided the city was too bad
to exist, and a 20 megaton nuclear bomb was tested on it.
     Then the world blew up.

     Hmm.. that was a k00l story!
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