624 lines
17 KiB
Plaintext
624 lines
17 KiB
Plaintext
Young men, young women:
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||
Mom won't buy Playboy Channel?
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You're not allowed to surf
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porn?
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Fear not.
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There's always CMT.
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||
Country Music Television; soft
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core porn or what?
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Greeeeeeeetings, and welllllllcome
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||
to ATI, Actively Toasted Ink.
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||
Issue 170! It's March 15, I'm
|
||
prime anarchist and you're not.
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||
ATI is not sponsored by 7UP.
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The official cola of the UN.
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||
Also, not brought to you by
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Proctor and Gamble, the makers
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||
of Always, Ultra Maxi with Wings,
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||
Mount Pleasant, Iowa.
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Look for your free samples Today!
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||
Postal Service regulations require
|
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that this 'zine be delivered together
|
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with its accompanying postage-paid
|
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sample.
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||
If you should receive this 'zine
|
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without its accompanying sample,
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||
please complain to your local
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postalworker.
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Now available in larger, more
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||
complicated Jumbo size packages.
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Thank you, Proctor and Hamburger.
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,
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_ || '
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< \, =||= \\
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/-|| || ||
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(( || || ||
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\/\\ \\, \\
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FROM THE PUBLISHER
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------------------
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GUILTY 'TIL PROVEN OOPS:
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Wrongfully Accused in the USA.
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by Prime Anarchist
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What do David Keaton, Randall Padgett,
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Ronald Keine, Jay Smith, Perry Cobb
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and Freddy Pitts have in common?
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All were released from death row
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between 1973 and 1997, having served
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a combined total of 35 years.
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Wrongfully accused.
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Has anyone looked them in the eye
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and said sorry? Not one that I know
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of.
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Mumia Abu Jamal would add 17 years
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to that total! 69 other people have
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been released since 1972 because the
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US justice system had made what we
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should call a big boo boo, for all
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intents and purposes.
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I became a tax-payer in this country
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on or about 1986. I stayed that way
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for quite a few years. The more I
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learn, the more I say "too many years,
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!Ya Basta!"
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OK Lemme get to the point.
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Padgett, Smith, Cobb, Abu-Jamal,
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let me be the next to say I'm sorry.
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!Lo fucking siento! Me f***ing disculpe.
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OR AM I THE FIRST? Anyone care to
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repeat after me? I'm sorry. Where do
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we go from here?
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Keaton, Keine, Pitts; I'm sorry, but
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I don't apologize for your plight.
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That didn't happen during MY cash-flow
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citizenship. Didn't happen on my watch.
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I empathize, I feel sorry, but I didn't
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allow these ones. Not my 'ballofwax.'
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Please forgive me, I paid my taxes like
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a "good nazi."
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Where do we go from here? I guess
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the Pope's guiltier than me. He started
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to atone earlier, and he's still going at
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it. He's pushing harder. Let me nudge the
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Pope a little.
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Hey Polish Pontiff. Let my death row
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people go. Talk louder, Pope. The prison
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industrial complex isn't hearing you yet.
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/prime/
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a side note that may hurt a little:
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if you're white, mostly white,
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or "passing" and you ever got
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pulled over for driving the wrong
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way on a one-way or something and
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all YOU got was a "let that be a
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warning" rather than handcuffs,
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bruises and your brother on death-
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row, repeat after me:
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"I'm really, really sorry."
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)(LETTUCE)(
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love your ezine as always
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:) krissy
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To the Editor of ATI:
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I only submit this spam in full because
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135 seconds after I posted a "usenet"
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blasting Viagra as something that
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sucks, I received this in my box.
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I don't have anything but two
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co-incident-al events here to go on,
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so I submit this for ATI's Conspiracy
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of the Month.
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prime (414)
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-------- Forwarded message --------
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Date: Sat, 13 Mar 1999 15:45:22 PST
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From: Dr John <grandcm@tm.net.my>
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To: none <grandcm@tm.net.my>
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Subject: Buy Viagra Online
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Hi
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are you shy? you don't have to be.
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NOW You can Buy Viagra online
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click below
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http://KwikMed.com/viagra/104194/
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The Online Source for Viagra.
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from Dr John
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Your Friendly Doctor
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hey, that haiku
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(there are no dryers in belize)
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is the best piece of poetry
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that ati has published yet...
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send more by her. Hey baby,
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I'm workin' on my PhD in
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creative writing...let's get
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concrete sometime.
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Chad.
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"How about canceling funds for
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weapons and counterinsurgency
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training for Mexico's armed forces??
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How about cancelling funds for the
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SCHOOL OF ASSASSINS at Ft. Benning,
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Ga.?? I'm putting in my order for
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this book!"
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--Michael Roadrunner about Marcos
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making the NYTimes again, and the
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SOA (school of the americas)
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1)How many blocks from your house
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is the nearest Taco Bell.
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12
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2)Nearest Walmart?
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30
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3)Nearest Walgreens.
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10
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Unfortunately this does not put
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all three within walking
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(spraypainting/wheatpasting)
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distance. How about for a
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future poll, how many blocks are
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you inclined to walk in a night
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of Wheatpasting in winter?
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Wheatpasting in summer?
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Spraypainting in winter?
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Spraypainting in summer?
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Steve (203)
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Subject: True-analog mastering
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on your desktop!!!
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If you record music with digital
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gear, you already know how
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challenging it can be to get
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that warm, broad, analog sound.
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T-RackS (http://www.t-racks.com)
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solves this digital dilemma with
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the first stand-alone mastering
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software for your Mac or PC,
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physically modeled after vintage
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analog gear.
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anon.
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[hmmm. spam or something useful?]
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[sometimes we get other peoples'
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mail...]
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Dear Mr. Benchley:
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Thank you for taking the
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time to read this letter. I have
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enjoyed you books very much!
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I, in turn, am working on a
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writing project that entails
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contacting writers, editors,
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and publishers who have a bit
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more familiarity with the horror
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genre than most others do, and
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asking them to vote for their
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own personal choice of the three
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best horror films of all time.
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I am tabulating the votes
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as they come in, calculating
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the results, and determining the
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order of approximately the top 50
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or 100 films to receive votes.
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I will of course be happy to
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furnish those results to all
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who have responded. The results
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will form the basis of a magazine
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article I will write on the very
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subject.
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I would be most honored if you
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could therefore e-mail your response
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to this thorny question: What are the
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three best horror films of all time?
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Best of luck to you in all
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your endeavors!
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Yours Sincerely,
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William Kozy care of
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billkozy@aol.com
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or
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billkozy@juno.com
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Lets flan the bastards!
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CVance
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Open Letter to Biotic Bakers
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I suggest the following:
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How about build a list of people
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we think FC might have bombed
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next, were Ted K not convicted
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and then arrested -- and pie them
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one by one declaring ourselves
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"a kinder gentler Luddite."
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Pi2K (541)
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DO THE NUMBAH RUMBA
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http://www.denverpost.com/news/news0314a.htm
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http://www.americanclass.com
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http://www.wildoats.com
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http://www.covertcomic.com
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http://www.clydelewis.com
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http://www.theofficenet.com/~redorman/pagea~1.htm
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http://www.laneta.apc.org/consultaEZLN
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http://www.truthinmedia.org
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http://www.netcom.com/~rnroybal
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http://www.ecoecho.org
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http://www.papershops.com
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http://www.cat.org.au/afaq/links.html
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http://elint.server101.com
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NEPOTISM WATCH.
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Drew Barrymore. All these
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years I never gathered, "wonder
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if she's related to the great male
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lead John Barrymore?" Well she
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is. Grand-daughter I'm told.
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For a review of "Never Been Kissed"
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see the back issues of ATI.
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(don't remember which one. 164?
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169?)
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MOVIE SCOOP OF THE WEEK.
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Brad Pitt will soon play General
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George Armstrong Custer in a yet-
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to-be-titled Oliver Stone movie.
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ATI - Occasionally Kicking
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Matt Drudge's Butt.
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FUNNIEST COMIC OF THE WEEK
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"The Future of Corporate Protest!"
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by R Sikoryak.
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Panel 2.
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<INLINE>
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BUSINESSES TELL THEIR CUSTOMERS
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WHICH PRODUCTS TO BOYCOTT.
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"If you worry about peasant
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farmers," says a skater-kid-looking-
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guy representing a coffee company
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which uses a lot of green marketing
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and has a "star" in its name and
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also a "bucks."
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"Don't buy the mocha. If you
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worry about recycling, avoid the
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styrofoam cups," he says looking
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so much the automaton a Seattle/
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Chicago merger made him.
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"If you worry about exploited
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workers," he says in a deliberate
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act of sensibility and self-awareness,
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"use the self-serve line."
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Heads up.
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Father Roy will be in Lodi, NJ
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March 20-21, and Philly Mar 24-28.
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He will be in Boston Apr 9-10,
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New Haven and Hartford Apr 12-13.
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Just so you know.
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If you're wondering what the heck
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I'm talking about, go back to your
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television, you'll be fine.
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----<><><><>----
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In memory of Alice Benally
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(Oct 30 1923 - May 21 1997),
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Robert Dorman will be posting a
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photograph of her (John Benally's
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mother) to his BM web page later
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today.
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Here is John's statement:
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MARCH 1999 AD
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My name is John Benally and I am
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'Where the water meets together'
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Clan and born for edge water,
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my patrilineal clan is Apache Clan.
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My matrilineal Grandfather is 'Many
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Goat Clan'.
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We need all the support we can
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at this time, a pressure on the
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BIA, the Dept of Interior.
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We are threatened with losing our way
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of life by relocating to the outside
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world. It is very important that we
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preserve our culture and ways of life.
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We can't live in western world. Our
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choices.. our ways of life.. being on
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land exercising our belief and we don't
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want any U.S. Government interference
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with our life. This is on behalf of all
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the ways on Indian land in this
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hemisphere. We don't like the human
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abuse, natural resource abuse thats
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happening in our nation.
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As we are all aware as five fingered
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family... we are ALL aware that we
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are losing all the differant
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atmosphere and depletion of our
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ozone, to where we're liable to
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||
sacrifice under these consequences.
|
||
We all know that once everything
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||
was in balance and pure, now we all
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know it's out of balance. Climate,
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global changes are happening, it's
|
||
here, greenhouse effect is here.
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These are my awareness's and my
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concern.. then I think we are all
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in the same boat. So act now, pressure
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the United States Government to tell
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them that they're liable for it.
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That means industrial nation, fossil
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fuel addiction, and nuclear addict.
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And thank you very much.
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John Benally.
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Black Mesa, AZ
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][ ][ ][ ][
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BROADSHEET TIME
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SOA by Marc Frucht. completed 12Mar99
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(cl) 1991 Marc Frucht.
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-for details on "copyleft"
|
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agreements see bottom-
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Bm
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Just got back from the school today, mama.
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F#7
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Didn't learn a thing today, mama.
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Bm
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Stuff you said about the golden rule
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E7 G
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Never shows up at that evil school
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Bm F#7 Bm
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Ain't goin to that school no more.
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(ch)
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Bm
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Ain't goin to that school no more,
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F#7
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Ain't goin to that school no more,
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Bm
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Don' worry mama I'll be OK
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E7 G
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They got nothin I can use anyway.
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Bm F#7 Bm
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Ain't goin to that school no more.
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Bm
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Marched right into that school today, mama.
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F#7
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Told them to put their toys away, mama.
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Bm
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All they taught me I don' need.
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E7 G
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Glutton, stealin' corporate greed.
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Bm F#7 Bm
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Ain't goin to that school no more.
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Bm
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This is school in americas, mama
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F#7
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Hate and conflict 101, mama
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Bm
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Programmed rage from the butt of a gun
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E7 G
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Sold their soul to Channel One.
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Bm F#7 Bm
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Ain't goin to that school no more.
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intro.
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------------2---
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------------3---
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------------4---(repeats
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-----------4---- once)
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-----4--2-------
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-2-5---5--------
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||
|
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-2-------2
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||
-3-------3
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||
-2-------4
|
||
-4-------4
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||
-5-4-2-0-2
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||
-2--------
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||
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melody.
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-----------------------------------------
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-------------------------3---------------
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||
-4---4----4----4----4----------4-2---2-4-
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-----------------------------------------
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-----------------------------------------
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-----------------------------------------
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Just got back from the school today mama
|
||
|
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----------------------2-2---2----
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-------------2---3------------2--
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-4-4------4----------------------
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---------------------------------
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---------------------------------
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---------------------------------
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Didn't learn a thing today, mama!
|
||
|
||
(cl) Copyleft. If you take this, you
|
||
must keep it intact at all times.
|
||
Anyone who asks for it must receive it
|
||
as quickly as you can get it to them.
|
||
Authorship information must remain
|
||
intact.
|
||
|
||
Any changes, parodies, editing must
|
||
be clearly marked.
|
||
|
||
Feel free to share, with any and all.
|
||
Please never make any money off this.
|
||
If you ever make more than you can
|
||
handle, please give away an equal
|
||
amount to the charity of your
|
||
choice.
|
||
|
||
Storage of this content in any
|
||
form signifies acceptance of
|
||
copyleft and the philosophy as
|
||
a whole.
|
||
|
||
Should you not agree with these
|
||
terms, there is a delete button
|
||
on your keyboard.
|
||
|
||
<><><><>
|
||
|
||
So here's the chart from last
|
||
week's ATI Poll.
|
||
We only got 6 responses so far.
|
||
Send yours in soon, so we can
|
||
have a much more accurate social
|
||
statement.
|
||
ati@etext.org
|
||
|
||
TB 12 1 8 12 11 8
|
||
WM 15 - 18 30 21 19
|
||
WG 25 - 9 10 14 13
|
||
|
||
So the average human, carbon-
|
||
based, lives about 9 blocks from
|
||
a Taco Bell, 17 blocks from a
|
||
Walmart and 12 blocks from a
|
||
Walgreens.
|
||
|
||
Oh yeah, and to the person who
|
||
sent in "1." What are you, the
|
||
owner?
|
||
#
|
||
|
||
Dateline March. In seperate
|
||
incidents, two Bronx toddlers were
|
||
killed when television sets toppled
|
||
on to their heads as they attempted
|
||
to hug the teletubbies.
|
||
/source/ Gear Magazine. March 99
|
||
pg. 32.
|
||
#
|
||
|
||
SHIPWRECK MAY BELONG TO MARCO POLO
|
||
<PAWN> Newport, RI - A marinara collegist
|
||
has uncovered clues that suggest a wreck
|
||
at the bottom of the harbour is that of
|
||
the HMS Sparticus, the ship that carried
|
||
the Polish Pope, Capt. Marco Polo on his
|
||
legendary South Pacific expedition two
|
||
years ago.
|
||
After James Cook didn't want it
|
||
anymore, Marco Polo bought it for an
|
||
undisclosed amount of $5.97; renamed it
|
||
and its fate became lost to time.
|
||
But DK Biafra says her reading of
|
||
old Yiddish proverbs indicates that
|
||
Sparticus may be lying in 20 feet of
|
||
jellyfish and Naval Weekend vomit in
|
||
Newsport Harbour.
|
||
If she is right, it "would easily
|
||
be one of the most important vessels
|
||
to be discovered in the history of
|
||
international merry time exploration,"
|
||
says Cotten "Hot Rod" Mather, an
|
||
underwater skinnydippologist at the
|
||
University of Rhode Island.
|
||
"If she's wrong," said John
|
||
Ledyard, UConn's department head of
|
||
Merry Time Anthropology, Archeology,
|
||
and Geological Surveys 7-432, "we'll
|
||
stone her in a public den of thieves,
|
||
vermin, prostitutes and politicians."
|
||
The Sparticus will be razed up as
|
||
soon as the divers can entice Keiko
|
||
to get away from it.
|
||
|
||
ATI FLAGWORD OF THE DAY
|
||
If on a resume or at an interview someone
|
||
keeps telling you how "proactive" they
|
||
are, steer clear. "Don't call us, we'll
|
||
call you." Get away, flee, kick them
|
||
out.
|
||
They won't get a darned thing done.
|
||
Proactive is a twenty-dollar word.
|
||
You can buy it in sheets at temp agencies
|
||
and job search companies all over the
|
||
world. Why, I once saw an 8X10 chock
|
||
full of these "power words." I was
|
||
tempted to apply for a job filling
|
||
out the resume alphabetically just
|
||
to see what comes of the interview.
|
||
But I didn't need a job.
|
||
|
||
|
||
To Interact interactively with ATI
|
||
go to:
|
||
http://www.thepentagon.com/primeanarchist
|
||
|
||
SWAG ME WITH A SPOONERISM
|
||
I've just learned of a neo-new
|
||
music industry standard. I do the
|
||
"double neo" there because it might
|
||
not be so new afterall. <payola>
|
||
It's something that probably should
|
||
have stopped before it began <payola>
|
||
Everyone from the Sex Pistons to
|
||
RadioHeard and everyone in between,
|
||
it seems, is required to think up a
|
||
junk toy <payola> price range $30-80
|
||
to attach to promo CD's given or lent
|
||
to journalists and DJ's. <payola>
|
||
It also parallels something which
|
||
greatly disturbs me in the past and
|
||
present <payola>
|
||
Say you're a rear-end admiral in
|
||
the US Davy or a Prentagon poop. And
|
||
you're trying to decide who gets a
|
||
billion dollar contract <payola>
|
||
Suddenly your secretary gets a dozen
|
||
roses from an anonymous source named
|
||
P Takis Veliotis of General Dynamics.
|
||
It's got hundred dollar bills poked
|
||
onto all the thorns. <payola> Who
|
||
Ya Gonna Award?
|
||
I don't know. Am I making too
|
||
much here? Reaching? Am I drawing
|
||
a parallel <payola> that's just
|
||
not close enough? You decide.
|
||
|
||
|
||
|
||
We end with two parodies to the
|
||
same song. NSinc's "Your Love is
|
||
Like a River."
|
||
|
||
1.
|
||
Your love is like a river
|
||
Gettin' me wet
|
||
Your soul is like a secret
|
||
That I never forget.
|
||
When I look into your eyes
|
||
My heart gets all blue.
|
||
God must have trust-
|
||
Ed me just to lust after you.
|
||
|
||
2.
|
||
You came into my life
|
||
Sent from above
|
||
When I lost all hope
|
||
You showed me love
|
||
I'm checkin for you
|
||
Boy you're right on time
|
||
Angel of mine.
|
||
|
||
Send everything to our complaint
|
||
dept. ati@etext.org
|
||
|
||
|