textfiles/humor/sayings.hum

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The following is a list of famous sayings as you have never heard them
before. See how many you can figure out.
Hint: Number 1 is "twinkle, twinkle, little star".
CELEBRATED ORACULAR UTTERANCES
Phill Caron 3-2-86
1. Scintillate, scintillate, asteroid minific.
2. Members of an avian species of identical plumage congregate.
3. Pulchritude possesses solely cutaneous profundity.
4. Surveillance should precede saltation.
5. It is fruitless to become lachrymose over precipitately departed
lacteal fluid.
6. Freedom from incrustations of grime is contiguous to rectitude.
7. The stylus is more potent than the claymore.
8. It is fruitless to attempt to indoctrinate a superannuated canine with
innovative maneuvers.
9. Eschew the implement of correction and vitiate the scion.
10. The temperature of the aqueous content of an unremittingly ogled
saucepan does not reach 212 degrees F.
11. All articles that coruscate with resplendence are not truly
auriferous.
12. Where there are visible signs of vapors having their prevenience in
ignited carbonaceous materials, there is conflagration.
13. Sorting on the part of mendicants must be interdicted.
14. A plethora of individuals with expertise in culinary techniques vitiate
the potable concoction produced by steeping certain comestibles.
15. Eleemosynary deeds have their incipience intramurally.
16. Male cadavers are incapable of yielding any testimony.
17. Individuals who make their abode in vitreous edifices would be advised
to refrain from catapulting petrous projectiles.
18. Neophyte's serendipity.
19. Exclusive dedication to necessitous chores without interlude of
hedonistic diversion renders Jack a hebetudinous fellow.
20. A revolving lithic conglomerate accumulates no congeries of a small,
green bryophytic plant.
21. The person presenting the ultimate cachinnation possesses thereby the
optimal cachinnation.
22. Abstention from any elevatory undertakings precludes a potential
escalation of a lucrative nature.
23. Missiles of ligneous or petrous consistency have the potential of
fracturing my osseous structure, but appellations will eternally remain
innocuous.
Need hints?
2. avian = birds
3. pulchritude = beauty
4. saltation = leaping
5. lachrymose = tearful
6. rectitude = upright moral character (don't be too literal)
7. claymore = a Scotish weapon capable of slicing off body parts
8. superannuated = old
9. scion = offspring
10. aqueous = water
11. auiferous = (literally) golden metal
12. prevenience = antecedents (lotsa help? means what came before)
13. mendicants = beggars
14. steeping comestibles = making broth
15. eleemosynary = charitable
16. cadavers = bodies (but you knew that didn't you)
17. petrous = stony
18. serendipity = good fortune (from the 7 princes of Serendip in
Candide who always had good things happen even though their
plans always went awry)
19. hebetudinous = dull
20. lithic = stony (as in paleolithic = stone age)
& congeries = collections
21. cachinnation = laughter
22. lucrative = profitable, but maybe gainful is a better clue
23. osseous = bony
Quite possibly you find the Greek and Latin easy, but it's
aphorism (adage if you prefer) that escapes memory. Here are
the first words of each:
Twinkle Birds Beauty Look No Cleanliness The You Spare A All
Where Beggars Too Charity Dead People Beginners All A He Nothing
Sticks
Allright, some do begin with articles; it shouldn't be too easy.