61 lines
2.0 KiB
Plaintext
61 lines
2.0 KiB
Plaintext
Disorder in the Court: a Collection of 'Transquips'
|
|
by Richard Lederer
|
|
|
|
Most language is spoken language, and most words, once they are
|
|
uttered, vanish forever into the air. But such is not the case with
|
|
language spoken during courtroom trials, for there exists an army of
|
|
courtroom reporters whose job it is to take down and preserve every
|
|
statement made during the proceedings.
|
|
|
|
Q. Now, Mrs. Johnson, how was your first marriage terminated?
|
|
A. By death.
|
|
Q. And by whose death was it terminated?
|
|
|
|
Q. What is your name?
|
|
A. Ernestine McDowell.
|
|
Q. And what is your marital status?
|
|
A. Fair.
|
|
|
|
Q. Are you married?
|
|
A. No, I'm divorced.
|
|
Q. And what did your husband do before you divorced him?
|
|
A. A lot of things I didn't know about.
|
|
|
|
Q. Do you know how far pregnant you are right now?
|
|
A. I will be three months November 8th.
|
|
Q. Apparently then, the date of conception was August 8th?
|
|
A. Yes.
|
|
Q. What were you and your husband doing at that time?
|
|
|
|
Q. Doctor, how many autopsies have you peformed on dead people?
|
|
A. All my autopsies have been performed on dead people.
|
|
|
|
Q. What happened then?
|
|
A. He told me, he says, "I have to kill you because you can
|
|
identify me."
|
|
Q. Did he kill you?
|
|
A. No.
|
|
|
|
|
|
THE COURT: Now, as we begin, I must ask you to banish all present
|
|
information and prejudice from your minds, if you have any.
|
|
|
|
Q. You say you had three men punching at you, kicking you, raping you,
|
|
and you didn't scream?
|
|
A. No ma'am.
|
|
Q. Does that mean you consented?
|
|
A. No, ma'am. That means I was unconscious.
|
|
|
|
Q. Did he pick the dog up by the ears?
|
|
A. No.
|
|
Q. What was he doing with the dog's ears?
|
|
A. Picking them up in the air.
|
|
Q. Where was the dog at this time?
|
|
A. Attached to the ears.
|
|
|
|
Q. When he went, had you gone and had she, if she wanted to and were
|
|
able, for the time being excluding all the restraints on her not
|
|
to go, gone also, would he have brought you, meaning you and she,
|
|
with him to the station?
|
|
MR. BROOKS: Objection. That question should be taken out and shot.
|