textfiles/humor/COMPUTER/master.pro

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From mokry@ctr.columbia.edu Sun Aug 12 19:46:50 1990
From: mokry@ctr.columbia.edu (Robert Mokry)
Subject: The Master Programmer -- a religious allegory
Keywords: original, smirk, computer
[One day when I was praying I suddenly realized that I was talking to
myself. It was then that I came up with the following story.
-- the preceding joke is NOT original, but the following story is.]
v^v^v^v^v^v^v^v^v^v^v^v^v^v^v^v^v^v^v^v^v^v^v^v^v^v^v^v^v^v^v^v^v^v^v^v^v^v
> <
< /--\ >
> | |nce upon a time there was a Master Programmer who created three <
< \--/ intelligent processes. He started all these processes up >
> with no information about the world. After a while He came <
< back to the processes. The first process printed out "I think >
> therefore I am," and continued deriving philosophy from first <
< principles. The Master Programmer looked upon the process and saw >
> that it was good (though He made a note to himself that the next <
< process that He would write wouldn't fall into the Cartesian >
> Circle). The second process printed "I don't believe in the Master <
< Programmer. Fuck the Master Programmer." The Master Programmer >
> laughed and watched the process evolve its ideas. Finally, the <
< Master Programmer looked at the third process. The third process >
> was printing "I love the Master Programmer. I love the Master <
< Programmer. I love the Master Programmer..." over and over. The >
> Master Programmer could see that this process was caught in an <
< infinite loop, so He sent it a kill -9 signal. >
> <
v^v^v^v^v^v^v^v^v^v^v^v^v^v^v^v^v^v^v^v^v^v^v^v^v^v^v^v^v^v^v^v^v^v^v^v^v^v
--
Edited by Brad Templeton. MAIL your jokes (jokes ONLY) to funny@looking.ON.CA
Attribute the joke's source if at all possible. A Daemon will auto-reply.
Remember: Always give your jokes a descriptive "Subject:" line. Not "joke."