64 lines
2.6 KiB
Plaintext
64 lines
2.6 KiB
Plaintext
come on, wake up and smell the pyrethrin! if you look around on
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BBSes these days, you will see three sharp delineations:
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a) the GEEKS. these people always call boards using their real
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names, often mis-spelled, and ask questions like `WHY CANT I
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GET MY C-^$, OOPS MY SEE SIXTY FOR, WHY WONT IT RUN DOOM?'
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b) the d00dz (or LAMERS). these guys (ALWAYS. there are NO
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D00D females) spend their time thusly:
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92 % Leeching x-rated GIFS and pirated games
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06 % reading one or two message areas, looking for game
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hints, new BBS numbers and ways to get around the
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fact that they're running up their parent's (ALWAYS.
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D00DZ ALWAYS live with their parents) phone bill;
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01 % composing messages that brag about themselves.
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sometimes, D00DZ will be content to quote
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Guns'n'Roses or Rap lyrics in reference to
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themselves, pointing out
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i) how much they hate the cops (R1LLY WE D0!!!!!)
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ii) how large their penises are (ITZ R1LLY BIG!!!!!)
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iii) how they are, generally, cool
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(WE R FUKEN EL1TE AN D U ALL SUK SH1T HEHEHEH!!!!)
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0.5 % lumping these messages into large chunks of text,
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calling them El1TE FUKEN E-Z1NEZ D00D!!!!! and
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uploading them under several different names, in
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order to help their already seriously bloated
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upload/download ratios.
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0.5 % trying to chat up anything on the board with a
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female-sounding pseudonym and masturbating messily
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all over the keyboard.
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then, there's -
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c) Us. people like Black Rose, Tal Meta, Gregh and our ilk.
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we've been here for a while, we've acquired a couple of
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clues, we can spell, are familiar with basic rules of
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grammar - and if you dare fall back on the John Kanash
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Excuse of `BUT 1 DONT FOLOW SOS1ET1EZ RULEZ 4 SPELING! 1M
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TOO FUKEN EL1TE 4 THAT!!!!!!', then we will all KNOW that
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you're a Lamer, and there's nothing you can do that will
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change it -
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i think the one thing that members of BBS class C have in
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common is Imagination and Creativity. i don't mean
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collecting Rap Lyrics, Doom Cheat modes and wads of all-caps
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swearing into EL1TE E-Z1NEZ!!!!!!!
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i mean the ability to step back from ourselves (falling off
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varioous soap-boxes if we do), look around us and laugh at
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what's going on.
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help is at hand. go find an album by `Pop Will Eat Itself',
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called `This Is The Day, This Is The Hour, This Is This!'
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and listen to the track called `Wise Up, Sucker!'
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