146 lines
7.0 KiB
Plaintext
146 lines
7.0 KiB
Plaintext
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ÜÜÜÜÜÜÜÜÜÜÜÜÜÜÜÜÜÜÜÜÜÜÜÜÜÜÜÜÜÜÜÜÜÜÜÜÜÜÜÜÜÜÜÜÜÜÜÜÜÜÜÜÜÜÜÜÜÜÜÜÜÜÜÜÜÜÜÜÜÜÜÜÜÜÜ
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ݱ06 Apr 86±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±_ROR_-_ALUCARD_±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±Ý Þ°
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Ý Ý A Þ°
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Ý The Wedding of the Wood Nymph & Raistlin Ý Þ°
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Ý Wedded on Peabody's Tomb A ßßßßß°
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Ý Tfile Þ°
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Ý Author: Shandor Distribution Þ°
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ÜÜÜÜÜ Centere Þ°
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Ý Þ (Wood Nymph / Aka: Muffled Screams) - RoR - Þ°
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Ý A Þ_____________________________________________________________________Þ°
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Ý Þ Shawn-Da-Lay Boy Productions, Inc.úúúúúúúúúúúúúúúúúúúúúúúúúúúúúúúúúúÞ°
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ÝÜÜÜÞÜÜÜÜÜÜÜÜÜÜÜÜÜÜÜÜÜÜÜÜÜÜÜÜÜÜÜÜÜÜÜÜÜÜÜÜÜÜÜÜÜÜÜÜÜÜÜÜÜÜÜÜÜÜÜÜÜÜÜÜÜÜÜÜÜÜÜÜÜÞ°
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°°°The°Pirates'°Hollow°-°415/236/2371°°The°Electric°Pub°-°415/236/4380°°°°
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*@*@* Reading: Wedding
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*---]]]]> (P)ause/(Q)uit <[[[[---*
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As I approached the chapel, I knew that history was about to be made. Never
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before had any adventurer actually pinned one of the elusive nymphs into
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marriage. Nymphs are usually love em and leave 'em types.
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Then I looked up and my thoughts were replaced with AWE. Before me, in the
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fog, loomed THE CHURCH, carefully crafted of stone, wood, and metal, it
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rose above the mist. Grinning stone gargoyles stared at me and then looked
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away. Lightning flashed in the background, lighting the stained glass
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windows momentarily, and giving the whole scene an eerie mood.
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My swimfins plopped noisly on the wet ground, and I pushed my mask and
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snorkel back onto my forehead.
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Straightening my bowtie, and checking to see that my tux jacket and black
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shorts were in order, I walked into the church's atrium. The doors to
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the chapel stood open, and I peeked through before heading for the
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dressing room.
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Most of the wedding guests had arrived. Near the front, King Phillip and his
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three loyal Nights sat decked in silk and jewels, swilling wine from golden
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goblets. Allanon, Death Wish, Serper, and The Unnamable all looked quite
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daper showing the late arrivals to seats while wearing black pants and
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tux top t-shirts.
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Walking around the back, I proceeded to the dressing rooms. There I found
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Raistlin, dressing in his Black robes, and staring at the ceiling with his
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hourglass eyes. "Well," said I, waking him from his reverie, "looks like the
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big day is finally here. How did you ever decide to wed a nymph, anyway?"
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"Ahh, it was the best choice I had," he replied, "Somebody who looks
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youthful even through my eyes. Besides, I know where her tree is."
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Music began to eminate from the walls.
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"Well, this is it. All ready?"
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"Yes, except for one thing. Have you got the ring?"
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"Awww, how could I forget something like that?" I said, fishing in my
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pocket. "It's right here.... somewhere"
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There was a small flash in Raistlin's right hand and he chuckled, "Sorry, I
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couldn't resist. Here you go." And he tossed me the ring. "Now, whatever
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you do, don't put that on. It's specially enchanted, and I don't want
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to be married to you, you know."
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"Hey, no problem. Personally, I'd rather spend eternity in thrall to
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a vampire."
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We began our walk to the altar, and out of the corner of my eye, I caught
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a glimpse of the nymph. AWOOOO!! I've never seen anybody wear bark and
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leaves in quite that manner before, but I sure would like to see it again.
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At the end of the walk, I saw Father Hawk, the minister. He had kind of an
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etherial smile, but also had a look of "Well, God, what kind of joke are
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You gonna play on me next." If you know what I mean.
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Raistlin and I took our places, and looked back up the aisle. Cairo,
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Chron, and Roach had begun their walk down the aisle, and I realized
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that the music had changed just a bit.
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I don't know if "Minnie the Moocher" it appropriate for most weddings, but it
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seemed to fit perfectly in this case.
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Donblas, Nymph's big brother, took her hand, and proceeded to walk down
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the aisle with her to give her away in her father's absence. Whistles
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came up from the crowd, but they were silenced quickly with stares from
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both Father Hawkwind and Raistlin.
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"Dearly beloved," began father Hawkwind, " we are gathered here today to
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see this mage and this nymph wedded in holy matrimony.
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And so on and so on....
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"Do you Raistlin take Wood Nymph to be your lawfully wedded wife, to
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honor and to charish, in sickness and health, for better or worse?
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"And do you Wood Nymph take Raistlin to be your lawfully wedded husband
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to honor and to charish, through sickness and health for better or for
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worse?
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A gleam came into Wood Nymph's eye. "Gee, I thought you'd never ask! Yes,
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ok."
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Raistlin looked up and said, "I dew, doo-doo, and do."
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"So by the powers vested unto me by a case of acid indegestion and the
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permanent state of insanity, I now pronounce you Mage and Nymph.
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"What God hath joined, let no man put asunder.
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"You may now kiss the bride.
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"This is a reminder: I will be doing confessions afterwards and i will
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be giving blessings.
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Raistlin lifted Wood Nymph's leafy veil, and bent down to kiss her. Her arms
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shot out and grabbed him around the neck, pulling him close. They kissed
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passionately for a minute. Two minutes. Three minutes. Cmeras flashed,
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and a little guy with a tweed jacket and a rumpled Fedora with a card
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saying:
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PRESS
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Image Man
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stuck in its band approached them to get a good closeup of Raistlin as he
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gradually turned purple.
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Finally, they broke their embrace, and amidst showers of rice and birth control
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pills, they walked back up the aisle together.
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Outside, the clouds had cleared, and a long green limo waited for them.
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In the front sat Maud'dib, decked in his finest black stillsuit, and a leather
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chauffer's cap.
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They got in the back and the limo took off down the forest road with a squeal
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of rubber. A sign on the back proclaimed "Just Married" and bells, shoes, and
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tin cans bounced on the road, hanging from vines tied to the back bumper.
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X-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-X
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Another file downloaded from: The NIRVANAnet(tm) Seven
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& the Temple of the Screaming Electron Taipan Enigma 510/935-5845
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Burn This Flag Zardoz 408/363-9766
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realitycheck Poindexter Fortran 510/527-1662
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Lies Unlimited Mick Freen 801/278-2699
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The New Dork Sublime Biffnix 415/864-DORK
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The Shrine Rif Raf 206/794-6674
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Planet Mirth Simon Jester 510/786-6560
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"Raw Data for Raw Nerves"
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X-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-X
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