228 lines
6.4 KiB
Plaintext
228 lines
6.4 KiB
Plaintext
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% %
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% What Assholes Do /// %
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% 'AE Assholes' %
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% Brought to you by %
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% The Neon Knights %
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% Written by: %
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% The Master of Reality %
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% & %
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% Zandar Zan %
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% Metal kicks ass! %
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A Neon Knight and Metal Communications
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presentation
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THE MORDOR AE-201-528-6467 PW:ZANDAR
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MS REALITY AE-818-706-2054 PW:HARRIS
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======================================
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This file is directed to better help all
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you assholes out there who don't know
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how to use an AE line a little more wise
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first of all,this is me (Zandar Zan)
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and MS Reality..telewriting together
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from opposite sides of this great,
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fantastic...worthless country of ours.....
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Let's go.....
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Assholes login and type in S7 D1 V2
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to catalog a volume.
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Assholes always, always look at the '?'
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option 3000 times before they finally
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memorize it.
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Assholes hit C>opy to get a ware.
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Assholes never, never upload anything
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better than '100 Different Ways to Eat
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Grapefruit' and then think that they are
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awesome for doing it.
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Assholes always, always look at each
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directory five times before looking at
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anything, and then try to V>iew a binary
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file.
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Assholes always take everything on your
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line, then page you 6000 times and when
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you finally answer, ask you to put more
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stuff up for them to D/L.
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Assholes break out of the hello file
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before they see the part saying...
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'now run on 10 megs' then they rag on
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you for not having anything up in
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yer floppy drives.
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Assholes post rag messages until they
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run out of space telling the sysop what
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a shitty system he has, because he
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doesnt have anything new up, even though
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he just D/L it the day before!
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Assholes don't know what Dalton's is and
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assholes try to BRUN a game that
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was split with Dalton's.
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Assholes don't know the difference
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between 'Dalton's' and 'Disk Rigger'
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and post messages asking if there is
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a difference and why.
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Assholes can't figure out why they
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can't R>eceive a game on the AE-line.
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Assholes call up AE lines with Data-
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Capture 4.0 and get upset when nothing
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works...
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Assholes call up AE lines and still
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use Smartcom I.
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Assholes don't know how to post private
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messages.
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Assholes who don't know how to post
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private msgs put their home phone
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number in the msg anyway.
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Assholes enter in the AE PW 40 times
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after they have already logged on, and
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don't have a clue as to how to use the
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system.
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Assholes hit 'return' after typing
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in the pswd to an AE-line.
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Assholes type D>irectory and then return
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and wonder why it wont show the catalog.
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Assholes use the C>opy function, then
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type away. when they are done, they
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type'/ex' and when that doesnt work.
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'help me sysop!' and finally hang-up
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and call right back.
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Assholes can't figure out why they
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can't D/L from an AE-line with their
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C-64.
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Assholes call the same AE line 10 times
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a day because it is local to see if
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there are any new wares to leech.
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Assholes read a file giving them
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directions on how to use ae with a
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hard drive, then have to view it 4 times
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because they forgot what they just read.
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Assholes call up the AE-line again and
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again after they just got a voice
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answering saying the line is down,
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call back later' thinking they got
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a wrong number.
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Assholes never say who they are when
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the sysop breaks in to chat..they give
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names like 'Mr. Who' and 'Dr. Nobody'
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and then when they decide to give their
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names out it is in the form of 'K-K00L'
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text gra-fix.
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Assholes use spinning cursors and other
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such K-K00L text graphics in their
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welcome file on their hours AE's that
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they set up two days a week from
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3:26pm to 6:47 pm.
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Assholes can't figure out why they got
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hung up on when the only left AE
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sitting there for 25 minutes without
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doing anything.
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Assholes S>end a ware, then sit there
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and watch it get BS Errs and don't know
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what they did wrong. (they don't know
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how to Ctrl-Q 'G' yet).
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Let me reiterate something that has been
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said before....Assholes are assholes.
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This is true, and will always remain so.
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assholes are invariably stupid. Very,
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very stupid. They don't know what is
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going on around them, or how to correct
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the matter at any given time at all.
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They are usually so stupid as to enter
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the wrong PW to the system 8 times in
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a row, until the sysop prompts them thru
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then they stare at the hello message un-
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til AE hangs them up! What assholes!!
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Assholes can't even read at the speed
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of 300 baud, frequently Ctrl-S ing and
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waiting 10 mins to read the page.
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Assholes shit if the sysop wants to go
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voice because they still either have
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a 2600 hz tone voice or a 1000 hz tone
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voice (both of which are really quite
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annoying).
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Assholes (AE assholes that is) read the
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file saying what wares are in what
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volume of a hard drive, then catalog
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every volume anyway..also, assholes
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catalog every volume, then view the file
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saying what wares are in what volume.
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What total assholes!
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Assholes copy their own 'Neet-0 K00L
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pagerzzz' onto the line which invariably
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feature real neat text graphics with a
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lot of Ctrl-G's...even though the sysop
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stated in the hello message that either
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his speaker was unplugged or he suppres
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sed Ctrl-G...which of course they did
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not see, because they broke out of the
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message prematurely.
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Now, this is only a small part of what
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AE assholes do. This is a guide direct-
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ed towards those of you who fit in here
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so you can learn to stop doing them and
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driving your friendly, courteous, AE
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sysops crazy with your lame assholeness
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and general idioticness.
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In our next file, we will discuss the
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lifestyle of the AE asshole, to maybe
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figure out what makes him so and why!
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This msg has been brought to
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you by the Neon Knight Network.
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Later and watch for the next file
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from MS Reality and Zandar Zan 'the
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life and times of the AE asshole'.
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Call 201-528-6467 PW:ZANDAR
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10 megs on-line 24hrs a day
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Also 818-706-2054 PW:HARRIS
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new wares and personal kraks by
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MS Reality.
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Call the Labyrinth: 401-885-2079
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