845 lines
43 KiB
Plaintext
845 lines
43 KiB
Plaintext
*=-- --=*
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{ George Carlin: nonconformist, liberal, open-minded, and by far }
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funnier than any other comedian-come-lately. His latest effort
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{ has been transcribed for your carnal [dis]pleasure. Enjoy! }
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*=-- --=*
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*=-- --=*
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{ the }
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-=*/> Buzzz Bros. <\*=-
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present
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_____________
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AN INCOMPLETE LIST OF IMPOLITE WORDS:
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2,443 FILTHY WORDS AND PHRASES
|
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Part I
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Compiled By George Carlin
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______________
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Text Entry by Havoc
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{ }
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*=-- --=*
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Note
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------
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During the nearly twenty years since the "Seven Words You Can Never Say On
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Television" first appeared on the Class Clown album, and especially since the
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time (1982) when the idea was expanded to include impolite expressions of all
|
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types, TV-banned or otherwise, hundreds of people have sent me suggestions on
|
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words and phrases which they thought ought to be included on the list. Some
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sent single items, while others submitted long lists they had obviously taken
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some trouble to compile. I wish now I had kept a record of their names. Not
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knowing I would one day attempt this project, my practice at the time was to add
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the submitted entries to my "filth" folder, send the person a few autographed
|
||
items (albums, pictures, videos, shirts) in appreciation, and discard the
|
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original letters. I wish I had handled it differently so that I could give them
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credit here. But, of course, the real credit belongs to the thousands of people
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over the centuries who invented these phrases in the first place, folk poets,
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all. To those who sent me their suggestions, you know who you are, and I thank
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you from the bottom of my farting clapper.
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George Carlin
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|
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Male Genitals
|
||
---------------
|
||
|
||
aaron's rod arm
|
||
baby-maker beef
|
||
blue vein meatroll bald-headed butler
|
||
bald-headed mouse belly buster
|
||
bathtub eel bearded blood sausage
|
||
bird bone
|
||
baloney banana
|
||
bat bayonet
|
||
bean tosser beef
|
||
belly ruffian blade
|
||
broomstick bum tickler
|
||
bush beater button-hole worker
|
||
cock candle
|
||
carrot club
|
||
crack haunter cranny hunter
|
||
cracksman creamstick
|
||
culty gun carnal stump
|
||
chicken child-getter
|
||
chink-stopper corey
|
||
crook dick
|
||
dork dong
|
||
doniker dingus
|
||
dipstick dagger
|
||
dart of love dearest member
|
||
dickey ding-dong
|
||
dinger dingle-dangle
|
||
dummy dodaddy
|
||
dolly dooflicker
|
||
down-leg dragon
|
||
eel end
|
||
family organ fiddle bow
|
||
fish fishing rod
|
||
flapper fool-sticker
|
||
forefinger fucker
|
||
foreman gun
|
||
gut wrench giggle stick
|
||
gadget gardener
|
||
giggling pin gooser
|
||
gravy maker grinding tool
|
||
gristle gut stick
|
||
hair splitter hambone
|
||
hammer hanging johnny
|
||
hoe handle holy poker
|
||
horn hose
|
||
hot rod heat-seeking moisture missle
|
||
hairy hot dog jack in the box
|
||
jemson jerking iron
|
||
jigger jing hang
|
||
jockam johnnie
|
||
johhny one-eye the bald-headed champ
|
||
johnson joint
|
||
joy knob joy prong
|
||
joy stick key
|
||
kidney cracker kielbasa
|
||
king member knob
|
||
knocker ladies' delight
|
||
ladies' lollipop ladies' treasure
|
||
lamp of life lance
|
||
life preserver little brother
|
||
little willie liver turner
|
||
live sausage lizard
|
||
lob lobcock
|
||
lobster lollypop
|
||
long john love dart
|
||
love gun love missile
|
||
lucy lung disturber
|
||
mad mick magic wand
|
||
man-root marrow bone
|
||
master john thursday master of ceremonies
|
||
meat meat hook
|
||
meat whistle member
|
||
merry maker middle leg
|
||
milkman mister goodwrench
|
||
mister tom mouse
|
||
muscle mutton dagger
|
||
my body's captain natural scythe
|
||
needle nimrod
|
||
nippy noodle
|
||
noony old blind rob
|
||
one-eyed night crawler in the turtle neck sweater
|
||
one-eyed milkman one-eyed trouser trout
|
||
one-eyed wonder worm pant muscle
|
||
pecker pee-pee
|
||
pen pencil
|
||
pendulum perch
|
||
peter piccolo
|
||
pike staff pile driver
|
||
pin pink pencil
|
||
pipe pisser
|
||
pistol plugtail
|
||
pocket piccolo pocket rocket
|
||
pointer poker
|
||
pole pork
|
||
pork sword post
|
||
prick pride and joy
|
||
prong pud
|
||
pudding pump handle
|
||
purple-helmeted warrior of love
|
||
pup putz
|
||
quickening peg quimstake
|
||
ram ramrod
|
||
rawmeat reamer
|
||
redcap rod
|
||
rod of love rolling pin
|
||
root rudder
|
||
rupert russell the wonder muscle
|
||
st. peter salami
|
||
sausage sceptre
|
||
schlong sexing piece
|
||
shaft shmock
|
||
short arm shove devil
|
||
shvontz silent flute
|
||
skin flute snake
|
||
spigot spike-faggot
|
||
spindle split-rump
|
||
spout staff
|
||
steaming hot kanga stem
|
||
stick sting
|
||
stump sugar stick
|
||
sword tail pin
|
||
tally-whacker tassel
|
||
tent-peg thing
|
||
third leg thistler
|
||
throbber throbbing python of love
|
||
tickle-gizzard tickler
|
||
tong tool
|
||
torch of cupid toy
|
||
trap-stick trouser anaconda
|
||
tube steak uncle dick
|
||
vomiting cobra wand
|
||
wang wazoo
|
||
weapon wedge
|
||
wheenie wacker
|
||
whip whistle
|
||
whore-pipe wick
|
||
willie winkle
|
||
wire worm
|
||
yang yard
|
||
yosh zubrick
|
||
|
||
|
||
Well-Endowed (male)
|
||
--------------------
|
||
|
||
Basket for days donkey-rigged
|
||
double-shung hung like a bull
|
||
miracle meat timbered
|
||
tons of basket tons of meat
|
||
well-favored by nature well hung
|
||
yard
|
||
|
||
|
||
Semen
|
||
-------
|
||
|
||
baby food baby juice
|
||
bull gravy buttermilk
|
||
chism come
|
||
cream crud
|
||
cum duck butter
|
||
fetch glue
|
||
gravy hockey
|
||
honey hot milk
|
||
jam jazz
|
||
jelly jism
|
||
jizz juice
|
||
letch water load
|
||
love liquor man oil
|
||
marrow mettle
|
||
milk oil of man
|
||
ointment oyster
|
||
prick juice pudding
|
||
scum seed
|
||
slime soap
|
||
spendings sperm
|
||
spew spratz
|
||
spume spunk
|
||
starch stuff
|
||
tail juice tail water
|
||
tallow wad
|
||
white blow white honey
|
||
|
||
|
||
Semen Related
|
||
---------------
|
||
|
||
pearl necklace pecker tracks
|
||
wet dream
|
||
|
||
|
||
Ejaculate
|
||
-----------
|
||
|
||
big bang bust your nuts
|
||
come come off
|
||
cream cum
|
||
die in a woman's lap drop your load
|
||
fire a shot get off
|
||
get the dirty water off your chest
|
||
get wet get your cookies
|
||
get your jollies get your rocks off
|
||
go off number three
|
||
pop a nut shoot
|
||
shoot off shoot your wad
|
||
spend squirt
|
||
|
||
|
||
Testicals
|
||
-----------
|
||
|
||
ballocks balls
|
||
bangers beecham's pills
|
||
bird's eggs boo-boos
|
||
charlies cherries
|
||
chestnuts clangers
|
||
cojones cubes
|
||
danglers eggs
|
||
family jewels glands
|
||
goolies jewels
|
||
kanakas love apples
|
||
marbles marshmallows
|
||
nards nuts
|
||
onions plums
|
||
pounders rocks
|
||
seeds slashers
|
||
spunk holders squirrel
|
||
food stones
|
||
swingers
|
||
|
||
|
||
Scrotum
|
||
---------
|
||
|
||
ball bag hairy bag
|
||
poke sack
|
||
|
||
|
||
Crab Lice
|
||
-----------
|
||
|
||
active citizens crabs
|
||
crotch crickets gentlemen's companions
|
||
neighbors to the south pants rabbits
|
||
seam squirrels
|
||
|
||
|
||
Syphllis
|
||
----------
|
||
|
||
coachman on the box french gout
|
||
irish mutton ladies' fever
|
||
lifelong friend neapoliton bone ache
|
||
old joe siff
|
||
spanish needle the old dog
|
||
|
||
|
||
Gonorrhea
|
||
-----------
|
||
|
||
buner clap
|
||
dose gleet
|
||
glim haircut
|
||
lues lulu
|
||
morning drop piss pins and needles
|
||
piss pure cream stank cock
|
||
strain tear
|
||
|
||
|
||
Female Genitals
|
||
-----------------
|
||
|
||
ace of spades adam's cave
|
||
altar of love bearded clam
|
||
beaver belly entrance
|
||
black bess bluebeard's closet
|
||
box brown madam
|
||
bull's eye bunny
|
||
bush button hole
|
||
cabbage patch canal
|
||
candle holder cat's meat
|
||
cave of harmony cavern
|
||
cellar door chocha
|
||
cleft clutch
|
||
cockpit cookie
|
||
coot cooch
|
||
cooze coupler
|
||
crack cranny
|
||
crease crevice
|
||
crotch crumpet
|
||
cunny cunny
|
||
cunt dimple
|
||
divine scar donut
|
||
drain eel-skinner
|
||
fish tank fort bushy
|
||
front window fur
|
||
furbox furburger
|
||
furrow gap
|
||
gaper gash
|
||
gate of heaven ginch
|
||
ginny girl-street
|
||
goat-milker gravy-maker
|
||
gully-hole hair
|
||
haircourt hair pie
|
||
happy valley harbour of hope
|
||
hatch hog eye
|
||
hole honey-hive
|
||
honey-pot horse collar
|
||
hot box hot spot
|
||
house under the hill irish fortune
|
||
itching jenny jack nasty-face
|
||
jaxy jelly-role
|
||
juice box keyhole
|
||
lady jane lamp of love
|
||
lapland lather-maker
|
||
little mary locker
|
||
long-eye love tunnel
|
||
lower lips magpie's nest
|
||
main vein manhole
|
||
mark of the beast meat
|
||
meat grinder mom's homemade slit pie
|
||
mound mount pleasant
|
||
mouse mouth-that-cannot-bite
|
||
muff naf
|
||
nature's tufted treasure nest
|
||
niche nook
|
||
nooky notch
|
||
oat-bin old mossyface
|
||
organ grinder oven
|
||
oyster catcher patch
|
||
pelt penwiper
|
||
pie piece
|
||
pin cushion pipe cleaner
|
||
piss flaps pit
|
||
playpen pocker
|
||
poke hole poontang
|
||
poor man's blessing prick purse
|
||
pussy quiff
|
||
quim quiver
|
||
rose screw-hole
|
||
slash slit
|
||
slot snapper
|
||
snappin' pussy snatch
|
||
snatch-box stank
|
||
steam room stuff
|
||
socket sportsman's gap
|
||
sugar basin tail
|
||
temple of low men tool-chest
|
||
toy shop treasure chest
|
||
trench triangle
|
||
trim tube
|
||
tuna taca tunnel
|
||
tunnel of love twat
|
||
tweeze twitcher
|
||
vag valley
|
||
venus highway vertical smile
|
||
wet cave of lust wooly-burger
|
||
works yawnie
|
||
yum-yum
|
||
|
||
|
||
Female Genitals (related)
|
||
---------------------------
|
||
|
||
boy-in-the-boa Female Genitals (related)
|
||
---------------------------
|
||
|
||
boy-in-the-boa Female Genitals (related)
|
||
---------------------------
|
||
|
||
boy-in-the-boa Female Genitals (related)
|
||
---------------------------
|
||
|
||
boy-in-the-boat bush
|
||
button cherry
|
||
clamp clit
|
||
clitty cleopatra
|
||
lady's low toupee lather
|
||
letch-water love juice
|
||
man-in-the-canoe merkin
|
||
mugget pussy fart
|
||
vaginal blood fart
|
||
|
||
|
||
Breasts
|
||
---------
|
||
|
||
apples balcony
|
||
balloons bangers
|
||
bazongas bean bags
|
||
big brown eyes bon-bons
|
||
boobies boobs
|
||
bottles boulders
|
||
bullets busters
|
||
bumpers butterbags
|
||
cantelopes gazongas
|
||
glands globes
|
||
grapefruits guavas
|
||
handful hand-warmers
|
||
headers headlights
|
||
hills honkers
|
||
hooters howitizers
|
||
jaboos jibs
|
||
jugs jumbos
|
||
kazongas knobs
|
||
knockers lactoids
|
||
loaves loblollies
|
||
love bubbles love muffins
|
||
lulus lungs
|
||
mammets mams
|
||
mangoes meatballs
|
||
meat loaves melons
|
||
milk cans milkshop
|
||
mounds mount of lillies
|
||
mountains muffins
|
||
mulligans murphies
|
||
nancies nature's fonts
|
||
niblets ninnies
|
||
nippers nodules
|
||
noogies nubbies
|
||
nuts oranges
|
||
orbs ottomans
|
||
pair nuts oranges
|
||
orbs ottomans
|
||
pair palookas
|
||
papayas paps
|
||
peaches peaks
|
||
pears pects
|
||
peepers pillows
|
||
pips pokers
|
||
pontoons potatoes
|
||
pumpkins pumps
|
||
rib cushions roundies
|
||
sandbags scones
|
||
scoops set
|
||
shakers shimmies
|
||
skin sacks snuggle pups
|
||
spheres spuds
|
||
stacks stuffing
|
||
sweater meat sweet rools
|
||
swingers tamales
|
||
tetons tidbits
|
||
tits titters
|
||
titties tomatoes
|
||
tooters torpedoes
|
||
twangers twin peaks
|
||
twofers umlauts
|
||
upper deck waldos
|
||
warheads warts
|
||
watermelons whoppers
|
||
wobblers wongas
|
||
yabbos yams
|
||
zeppelins
|
||
|
||
|
||
Menstruation
|
||
--------------
|
||
|
||
aunt flo aunt rosie is in town
|
||
all's not quiet on the waterfront
|
||
blood week collywobbles
|
||
curse of eve drip
|
||
entertain the general fall off the roof
|
||
flying the flag having the painters in
|
||
high tide holy week
|
||
jinx little sister is here
|
||
monthlies my buddy
|
||
my friend on the bun
|
||
on the pole on the rag
|
||
period problem
|
||
ragging ragtime
|
||
red flag red sails in the sunset
|
||
riding the cotton bicycle riding the cotton pony
|
||
road up for repairs sick
|
||
stop sign tail flowers
|
||
that time that way
|
||
the captain is at home the curse
|
||
the foe the hammock is swinging
|
||
the plague the thing
|
||
the visitor turns
|
||
wearing the bulky roll woman's home companion
|
||
|
||
|
||
Sanitary Napkin
|
||
-----------------
|
||
|
||
bandage clout
|
||
cuntrag fanny rag
|
||
flag granny rag
|
||
manhole cover mouth mattress
|
||
muck rag pleasure garden padlock
|
||
rag red flag
|
||
window blinds
|
||
|
||
|
||
Pregnant
|
||
----------
|
||
|
||
about-to-find-pups apron up
|
||
baby-bound bagged
|
||
belly up big with child
|
||
broken-kneed clucky
|
||
cocked-up coming fresh
|
||
delicate condition double-ribbed
|
||
fragrant full of heir
|
||
gone to seed have a dumpling
|
||
have one in the oven have one's cargo aboard
|
||
in a family way in pod
|
||
in the pudding club in trouble
|
||
knocked up loaded
|
||
looking piggy on the bones
|
||
P.G. pillowed
|
||
preggers preggy
|
||
shot in the giblets storked
|
||
stung by a serpent swallowed a watermelon seed
|
||
up and coming up the stick
|
||
wedged up with squirrel
|
||
|
||
|
||
Fornication
|
||
-------------
|
||
|
||
a bit of jam action
|
||
ball ballock
|
||
boloney ride bananas and cream
|
||
bang basket making
|
||
batter beef
|
||
beef injection be in a woman's beef
|
||
belly ride belt
|
||
blanket drill blow off the loose corns
|
||
board boff
|
||
bone bore
|
||
bottle bounce
|
||
bump bump fur
|
||
bunny stick burry one's wick
|
||
bury the bone bush patrol
|
||
buzz the brillo cane
|
||
change one's luck charge
|
||
chuck a tread climb
|
||
cock up come across
|
||
couple with cover
|
||
crack it cram
|
||
crawl cream
|
||
cut dance the mattress jig
|
||
daub of the brush dick
|
||
dicky dunk diddle
|
||
dig your stinger in the honey dip your stick
|
||
dip your wick dirty work at the crossroads
|
||
do do a dive in the dark
|
||
do a flop do a push
|
||
do a slide up the board dog
|
||
do it do the deed
|
||
do the nasty ease nature
|
||
exchange spit feather-bed jig
|
||
feed the dummy fiddle
|
||
firk fit end to end
|
||
fix her plumbing flesh session
|
||
flop flop in the hay
|
||
four-legged frolic frig
|
||
fuck fun and games
|
||
get a bit get a chunk
|
||
get a crumpet get a hunk
|
||
get a little get a piece
|
||
get a snipper get a wet one
|
||
get home get in
|
||
get into her pants get into some serious flesh
|
||
get it on get jack in the orchard
|
||
get laid get lucky
|
||
get one's ashes hauled get one's greens
|
||
get one's leather stretched get one's noodle wet
|
||
get one's oil changed get some
|
||
get some action get some ass
|
||
get some crack get some hair
|
||
get some hole get some pussy
|
||
get some stuff get some tail
|
||
get some tweeze get your bean waxed
|
||
get your pole varnished give her a stab
|
||
go all the way go like a belt-fed motor
|
||
go to bed with go to it
|
||
go to town go vaulting
|
||
grease the wheel grind
|
||
grind on'e tool hanky-panky
|
||
have have a bit
|
||
have a bit of giblet pie have a bit of summer cabbage
|
||
have a blow through have sex with
|
||
hide the ferret hide the salami
|
||
hit on the tail hock
|
||
hop on horizontal refreshment
|
||
hose hot roll with cream
|
||
hump impale
|
||
introduce charlie invade
|
||
irish whist jazz
|
||
jink job
|
||
join paunches jounce
|
||
joy ride jug
|
||
juke jump
|
||
jump on one's bones knock
|
||
knock off a piece know
|
||
ladies' tailoring lay
|
||
lay off with lay some pipe
|
||
lay the hip lay some leg
|
||
leap leap on
|
||
lie lie with
|
||
lob in love
|
||
make make feet for childrens shoes
|
||
make it make love
|
||
make out with make the scene
|
||
making babies makin' whoopie
|
||
mate mess around
|
||
mingle limbs mix one's peanut butter
|
||
mount mugg
|
||
muss nail
|
||
mail two bellies together nick
|
||
nib nig
|
||
nub nut
|
||
oblige off
|
||
park your yacht in the hair harbor
|
||
peel one's best end peg
|
||
perform pestle
|
||
piece piece of ass
|
||
piece of pussy piece of snatch
|
||
piece of tail pile
|
||
pile-driving pin
|
||
plant the oats play at all fours
|
||
play hide the bone plow
|
||
pluck plug
|
||
pocket the red poke
|
||
pole pole work
|
||
polish your rocket pop
|
||
pork post a letter
|
||
pound pump
|
||
punch push
|
||
put the boots to put the tool in the shed
|
||
quimsticking ram
|
||
ride rip off
|
||
rites of venus roasting the broomstick
|
||
roll roll in the hay
|
||
rock rod
|
||
roger romp
|
||
root rootle
|
||
roust rub bacons
|
||
rub up rumble
|
||
rumple rutting
|
||
salt saw off a chunk
|
||
score screw
|
||
scutz around secret services
|
||
service shack up
|
||
crew
|
||
scutz around secret services
|
||
service shack up
|
||
shaft shag
|
||
shake shake the sheets
|
||
shoot between wind and water shoot one's wad
|
||
short arm practice shove
|
||
shtup sink the sausage
|
||
sink the soldier slam
|
||
sleep with slip her a length
|
||
slip into split
|
||
spoil suattin' on the hog
|
||
squat jumps in the cucumber patch
|
||
squeeze and a squirt stab
|
||
stable my naggie strop one's beak
|
||
strum stuff
|
||
swing tail-work
|
||
take a turn in the stubble take a turn on shooter's hill
|
||
tear off a piece tear the sheets
|
||
the disappearing cane trick the matrimonial polka
|
||
thread thread the needle
|
||
throw a hump throw a leg over
|
||
throw a shot thump
|
||
tie the true lover's knot tiff
|
||
tip the long one to be intimate
|
||
tooling in the woods tops and bottoms
|
||
trim trim the buff
|
||
trip up the rhine tumble
|
||
tumple turn up
|
||
twiddle varnish one's cane
|
||
vault vitamin F
|
||
wap wham
|
||
what mother did before me wind the clock
|
||
womanize work
|
||
work out work the dumb oracle
|
||
work the hairy oracle yard
|
||
yentz
|
||
|
||
|
||
Sexual Arousal (both sexes)
|
||
-----------------------------
|
||
|
||
blotty brimming
|
||
bulging cockish
|
||
dripping for it feeling hairy
|
||
frisky fuckish
|
||
gamy hairy
|
||
horny hot
|
||
hot-assed hot and bothered
|
||
hot nuts hot pants
|
||
humpy in the mood
|
||
in season itchy pants
|
||
juiced up juicy
|
||
lathered moist
|
||
motor running on for one's greens
|
||
oncoming pruning
|
||
ramish randy
|
||
ready rooty
|
||
ruttish sexed up
|
||
tumbling ripe turned on
|
||
up wet
|
||
|
||
|
||
Sexually Fixated
|
||
------------------
|
||
|
||
cock-happy cunny haunted
|
||
cunt-struck
|
||
|
||
|
||
Testaglia
|
||
-----------
|
||
|
||
blue balls hot rocks
|
||
love nuts lover's nuts
|
||
stone ache
|
||
|
||
|
||
Condom
|
||
--------
|
||
|
||
balloon cheater
|
||
close combat sock diving suit
|
||
drop catcher eel skin
|
||
fear-not french letter
|
||
gasket joybag
|
||
one-piece overcoat pipe pullover
|
||
port said garter raincoat
|
||
rubber rubber glove
|
||
safe scumbag
|
||
sheath showercap
|
||
tail sheath
|
||
|
||
|
||
Erection
|
||
----------
|
||
|
||
bone boner
|
||
bone on burgeoning truncheon
|
||
captain standfish flagpole
|
||
hard hard-on
|
||
horn in one's best clothes
|
||
irish toothache mean-on
|
||
morning pride old hornington
|
||
on the stand pants pusher
|
||
piss hard piss proud
|
||
prod proud below the navel
|
||
proud mary rail
|
||
riser rise in the levi's
|
||
rod-on rock python
|
||
spike stalk
|
||
standing ware stand-up
|
||
stiff stiffer
|
||
steely dan sporting a sequoiya
|
||
throbber woody
|
||
|
||
|
||
Illegitimate Child
|
||
--------------------
|
||
|
||
accident adulterine
|
||
babe of love bachelor's son
|
||
bar steward bastard
|
||
born out of wedlock bush colt
|
||
bye-blow catch colt
|
||
chance-born chance child
|
||
hasty pudding love child
|
||
merry-begotton child misbegotten
|
||
momzer natural
|
||
nephew niece
|
||
out-child side wind
|
||
single child son of a bitch
|
||
squeaker stall whimper
|
||
whoreson yard child
|
||
|
||
________________________
|
||
|
||
End of Part I
|
||
Continued in BB file #14
|
||
|
||
-=*/> Buzzz Bros. <\*=-
|
||
(c) MCMXCI
|
||
________________________
|
||
|
||
|