579 lines
20 KiB
Plaintext
579 lines
20 KiB
Plaintext
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ÜÜÜÜÜÜÜÜÜÜÜÜÜÜÜÜÜÜÜÜÜÜÜÜÜÜÜÜÜÜÜÜÜÜÜÜÜÜÜÜÜÜÜÜÜÜÜÜÜÜÜÜÜÜÜÜÜÜÜÜÜÜÜÜÜÜÜÜÜÜÜÜÜÜÜ
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ݱ06 Mar 90±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±_ROR_-_ALUCARD_±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±Ý? Þ°
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Ý Ý A Þ°
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Ý A Trip To The Land Of Else Ý ?Þ°
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Ý A Search For Surface A ßßßßß°
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Ý Tfile Þ°
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Ý Written By: Sir Death - Doctor Murdock Distribution Þ°
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ÜÜÜÜÜ & Bud The Budweiser Person Centere Þ°
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Ý? Þ - RoR - Þ°
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Ý A Þ_____________________________________________________________________Þ°
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Ý ?Þ Shawn-Da-Lay Boy Productions, Inc.úúúúúúúúúúúúúúúúúúúúúúúúúúúúúúúúúúÞ°
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ÝÜÜÜÞÜÜÜÜÜÜÜÜÜÜÜÜÜÜÜÜÜÜÜÜÜÜÜÜÜÜÜÜÜÜÜÜÜÜÜÜÜÜÜÜÜÜÜÜÜÜÜÜÜÜÜÜÜÜÜÜÜÜÜÜÜÜÜÜÜÜÜÜÜÞ°
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°°°The Pirates' Hollow - xxx/xxx/xxxx°°The Electric Pub - xxx/xxx/xxxx°°°°
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°Primary Drop Sites°°°°°°Rat Head - xxx/xxx/xxxx°°°°°Primary Drop Sites°°°
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SHROOM4.DOC
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A Trip To The Land Of Else - The Search For Surface
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=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=
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+++--- INTRODUCTION ---+++
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Introductions were lost due to political bullshit so this space is
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intentionally left blank.
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<blank>
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+++--- CREDITS ---+++
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Carbon Based Unit #1: Sir Death
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Carbon Based Unit #2: Doctor Murdock
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Carbon based Unit #3: Bud The Budweiser Person
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Carbon based Unit #4: That One
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Carbon based Unit #5: That One's Carbon Based Wife
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The Pit Bull Unit: Cremator
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Music by : Pink Floyd \ The Dark Side of the Moon
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Drug and Sanity Collector: An ounce of Psilocybin Mushrooms.
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SCENE - 1
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[ A dark Friday night, clouds covering the moon. Temperature around
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Warm....]
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Outside of Carbon Based Unit #1's house a white Mustang with blue
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strips pulls up to the curb and parks. The engine goes off and then the
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sounds of AC/DC come to a hault. The car door shuts and Carbon based
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Unit #2 walks up to the house. Into the door and up to CBU#1's room.
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CBU#1: "Arooobaaahhh!"
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CBU#2: "Whats up dude! Ready to jam? {drink beer}
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(note: the { } sign indicate subliminal messages from the current
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carbon based unit. Also, they have been called Fnords...]
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CBU#1: "Shoobetcha...let me get my jacket and we're off! Boy...I sure
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could go for a beer...."
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CBU2: "Okeedokey, fine..."
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CBU 1 & 2 exit the house and walk over to the piss yellow Omni, CBU1
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mumbles something about 400 pounds of shit in the back of his car to CBU2 and
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they start walking to the Mustang, get in and proceed onward with their
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journey of unknown destination.
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After a quick stop at the liquor store they arrive at Carbon Based Unit #4's
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house.
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<knock knock> <creeeeeaaaaaaakk>
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CBU1: "It's Death at your door, you knob!"
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CBU2: "Geez, eh....I sure could go for a beer, let us in, you knob!"
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CBU4: "Aaaaaahhhh, there's too inlarged hosers at the door! Hey,
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dudes...come on in!"
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The beers are cracked open and the Units have a seat. CBU#1 & CBU#2
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leech some of CBU#4's wisdom and all around awesome knowledge as they
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continue to drink. CBU#4 passes around a joint to other CBU's and they
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all attempt to get stoned. (But other things happen....) They watch a
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MOST twisted tale of the Twilight Zone and ponder this extremely Deep
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Question with laughs...
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"If you were in an Airlock and about to be jettisoned ....would you
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hold your breath?"
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None of them has a direct answer to this....but feel enlightened after
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thinking about it.
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CBU#4: "Hahahahahahaha..."
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CBU#2: "HahahaHAhaHA.."
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CBU#5: "HahaHHAHAhahah..."
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CBU#1: "Hohohohohoh..."
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After an hour or two CBU#1 & 2 get up and with farewells they leave.
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They head back over to CBU#1's house, and on the way see CBU#3's car!
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They slow down and wait...as it turns around a follows them back to
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their destination.
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CBU#3: "Where the FUCK have you guys been?! I've been looking all over
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for you!!"
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CBU#1: "Oh...we went over to CBU#4's for a few Beers...whatcha doing,
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eh?"
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CBU#2: "Wanna do some Mushrooms??"
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CBU#3: "I sat out in front of your house for 2 hours. Hahaha. Shit.
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So...did you talk to Paul about the pool table? "
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CBU#1: "Yep...all I have to do is go GET it!"
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CBU#2: "Wanna do some Mushrooms??"
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CBU#3: "He better not gonna change his mind and give it to someone
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else! That table is going to Doc's..and thats THAT!"
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CBU#1: "Yeah, I know...it's MY table, all we havta do is pick it up!"
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CBU#2: "Wanna do some Mushrooms??"
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CBU#3: "Great. So...lets go to Cliff's or something, I'm not going
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home after waiting all that time...."
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CBU#1: "Hmmm...wanna go to Doc's and do some Mushrooms??"
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CBU#3: "Hmmm, ok, sure!"
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CBU#2: "Mushrooms?"
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As CBU#1 & 3 proceed to take a leak on a tree in the front yard,
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CBU#2 waves and takes off, followed by CBU#1 & 3 in the piss yellow
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Omni.
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Soon they all arive to CBU#2's home of residence. They quietly enter
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the house and slip down into the basement as to not arouse any sleeping
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CBU's.
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SCENE - 2
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[ A dark Basement. Time: 11pm. With Condeferate Flag and miscellaneous
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road signs the wall. Floor cluttered with engine parts and junk.
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Big stereo, miscellaneous chemicals about and the Green Glacier ominously
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glowing on a shelf. A bottle of Everclear, a skull, the black fone and
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some used foil cradles.... A PERFECT place to fry your brain!]
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CBU#3: "So, all we have to do is move all this shit and out the
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table right here!"
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CBU#2 runs upstairs to grab some bread and peanut putter, some Liptons
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ice-tea in the cans and a butter knife. (Big, Long, Sharp, Pointy,
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KNIFE??!)
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CBU#1: "Yep! Get it level, put the bar right there and we're in
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business!!"
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CBU#2 returns....gets the keys out of his pocket and opens the secret
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drug cabinet. Pulls out a box filled with miscellaneous drug
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paraphenalia and grabs a bag of shrooms from it. They all make up a quick
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sandwhich.
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CBU#3: "Gobble, gobble, gobble, <glurp>.."
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CBU#2: "Scarf, Scarf...Scarf....<Gulp>...."
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CBU#1: "Gulp, Gulp, GulP....<Swallow>........"
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CBU#1 peeks out the window to the backyard and says high to
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Cremator...who is steadily peering into the window awaiting the CBU's at
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ANY givin moment to take him to Wildcat Canyon for a walk, even though
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it is pitch black out. At the window he sits.
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While CBU#1 & 3 are talking about nuclear fission, CBU#2 secretly
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slinks over to a table, opens a toolbox and grabs a syringe. He
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SPRINGS out at CBU#3 and chases him around the room! CBU#1 points out
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that any minute CBU#3 is going to be peeking and that a syringe might
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not be the best thing for him to be staring at since he has a phobia
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towards them. CBU#3 agrees totally as a drop of sweat drops off his
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head onto the basement floor. CBU#2 puts the syringe away and they all
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sit.
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CBU#3: "My fingers are starting to tingle...."
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CBU#1: "I wonder what Gary is up to......Hahaha, just kidding."
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CBU#2 is playing Nethack.
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40 minutes later.....
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CBU#3: "Ooooooooooooooohhhhhhhhhhhh, maaaaaaaaaaaaaaannnnnnnnnn....."
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CBU#1: "Baaaaaaaaaaaaaddd Shrooooooooooooooooooooooooooom................
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Gooooooooooooooooooooooooddddddddddd Shrrrrrrrrroooooommmm...."
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CBU#2: "Wwwwwwwwhhhhhhhhhhhooooooaaaaa, maan. Oh...woooowww!"
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The CB Units are peeking about this time. Trying to hold a meaningful
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conversation to keep them from slipping into the Ozone of Farble...
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CBU#1: "I have 400 pounds of useless SHIT in the back of my car...you
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want to go unload it know? <grin>"
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CBU#3: "Maybe I should go to the bathroom? <faaadee>"
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CBU#2: "He just sits there.....he just sits at the window, and waits.
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Most dogs are asleep by now...but he just waits there..."
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CBU#1: "He doesn't want to go anywhere because he think that if he
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leaves for a split second, that we will go to Wildcat for a
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walk without him. SttttttUUUUUUUUpppid, Doggggggggg.....Haha."
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CBU#3: "HahahahahahaahahahaaaahahahahaahahahahahHAHAHahAHAhAhahAha!!"
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CBU#1: "phphplhphlhplhphphphlhplhphlphlhphphlhplhhplhph...."
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CBU#2: <ffffffffrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrryyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyy>
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15 minutes pass with no sound....shapes shift and sounds float by...Pink
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Floyd plays through the speakers lullying the CB Units into the neather
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reaches of the Land Of Else....pulling them through time layers and
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eddies of light....to the soft, smooth, Aqua coloured Land Of Else.
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CBU#1 is stunned by the sharp sound of bells coming directly at him
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through those big boxes.....he waves a hand in front of his face and
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Shifts back into reality.
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CBU#1: "Ahhh...weeding out the bad brain cells...getting rid of the
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sick and old. I think I'll get up....."
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<He thinks about getting up...>
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CBU#3 is meanwhile playing with his fingers...he touches his two index
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fingers together...
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CBU#3: "What happends if you leave your fingers together like this for
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too long, I wonder....."
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CBU#1: "They MATE of course..."
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CBU#3 & 1 look at each other and find that realization funnier than all
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hell itself and commence laughing. CBU#2 is watching the pretty colours
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move in his Telix dialing directory.
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CBU#3: "Hahahaha....I better not do this too long or I'll have 14
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fingers! HAHAHAHAHA!
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CBU#1: " HAhahahaha! You'll wake up with 14 fingers and say DAMN!
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don't you HATE when that happens??!? HAHAHAHAH!
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CBU#3: "OH, GOD....14 fingers and <looking at his feet> 20 toes!! What
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do you do with 20 toes??!!"
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CBU#1: " 14 fingers and 20 toes.......and SIX HEADS!!! HAHAHAHHAHA!"
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CBU#2 puts on a pair of welding goggles and is amazed at the new world
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he has found....he is totally awed by this new place...these new fuzzy
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shaped and dim light. He thinks he'll stay.
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CBU#3: "SIX HEAD! HHAHAHAHHAHAHAHAHA "
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CBU#1: "What would I claim on my tax form?"
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CBU#3 zones out...
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CBU#1: "Six heads...it's literally impossible to get anything done with
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6 heads. You would argue about everything! Then theres always
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that ~bad~ head.....the one that always goes ~Lalalalalala~ when
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all the others are trying to sleep.
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Head-1, "Shut Up! You always do that!!!"
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Head-4, "Lalalalalalalaalalalalalalalalalalaallaalalalalalala!"
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Head-2, "Hit him! Hit the fucker! Shut up! I have a date
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tomorrow!!"
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Head-5, "Me too, Dammit!!
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Head-4, "Lalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalala!"
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Head-3, "Take this!"
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<Head-3 tries to punch Head-4!! Head-4 dodges the blow from
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Head-3. Head-2 swings at Head-4...misses and hits Head-5!>
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Head-5, "OUCH!"
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Head-4, "Hhahahahaa, you misses! Lalalalalalalalalalalalalala!>
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Head-1, "Get him again! Swing at him! Shut that Son-of-a-bitch
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up!!"
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<Head-5 swings at Head-4, misses and knock Head-1 unconscious!
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Head-4 is wide-eyed and has a serious grin on his face...
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Head-2 throws a vase at Head-4, Head-4 ducks and it breaks
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a mirror. Head-5 throws a fist at Head-4 but hits Head-3
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instead! Head-4 bites Head-5's ear and starts pulling!>
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Head-5, "AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!!"
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Head-3, "Grab him now while he's not moving!!!!"
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<Head-3 grabs Head-4 and holds him still while Head-2 gets
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some duck tape. Heads-1-2-3-5 duck tape Head-4's mouth shut.
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Head-4 screams and yells still but is muffled now...>
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Head-5, "Geezus! It's about time! Now lets get some sleep!"
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Muffled Head-4, "Lalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalala
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lalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalala!"
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Time passes..................s-l-o-w-l-y.................
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SCENE - 3
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[ Carbon Units 1, 2, & 3 are in CBU#2's basement. All in their
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respective corners, zoning, spacing, shifting, and frying. The
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Time: 2:30am.]
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CBU#1 in his chair of solitary, CBU#3 laying on the floor watching
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the wood move on the wall, and....]
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CBU#2 is staring out into the backyard at through a slit in the
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blinds, dawning his welding goggles. The Pit Bull Unit is still
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in the same location under the window....occasionally he jumps up on the
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window seal to get a closer look at CBU#2.
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CBU#2: "......and the funny part is, that I am in totally control of
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his life. <shift out>"
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CBU#3: "I think I'll go to the bathroom. What time is it? "
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CBU#3 gets up from his corner and goes to the bathroom.
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CBU#1: "Oh, man...I have a date tomorrow at 8 in the morning. Oh, man.
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What was I thinking?? Lets take Mushrooms at 11 at night?
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SsssssttttUUUUUUUUUpppiiiiddddd, SSSSSSSTTttuUUUUUUpppiidd!!"
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CBU#1 stand up and moves 5 feet NorthEast and stops.
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CBU#2 turns around and lifts his goggles off.
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CBU#2: "whoa.....reality....no way..........."
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CBU#2 slides his goggles back onto his head and stares out through the
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blind again.
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CBU#1: "Colours, man..........................traces, traces. Oh,
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shit....I gotta come down. I have to go to sleep! Ohhhhh,
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fuck. <CBU#1 turns and looks at CBU#2> Things are Shiften,
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man...things are Shiften............."
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CBU#2: "#(*#@!)$*@....#@(& $&^%^%%^)!$%#$&*%.....<bink!>.............
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<bbbuuuuuuuuuuuuuuzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzz....>
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300 seconds later.......
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CBU#3 returns from the bathroom. CBU#1 goes to the bathroom.
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CBU#3: " Wow. Neat bathroom. I was stuck in there for awhile....
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What time is it?"
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CBU#2 moves away from the blind and removes his goggles. Takes a deep
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breath and slumps over and stairs at the floor.
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CBU#3 returns to his spot on the floor.
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CBU#1 returns from the bathroom.
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CBU#1: "Ya know, Doc...if you just take all that shit off the wall in
|
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there and take that toilet out, that would be a really neat
|
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place.....nice and white....and square..and small...."
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The CB Units are still and quiet...the only sound is that of the crisp
|
||
sounds of an egg frying in a skillet.
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CBU#2: "It looks like a normal floor...................................
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..........................................................."
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CBU#1: "It talks like a normal floor..............................."
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SCENE - 5
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||
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||
[ The need for Surface arrives. The need for Reality is here. The
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absence of anything Real has gone on long enough. Exhaustion set
|
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in. The mind has over worked in these CBU's. The need for rest and
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||
Surface has come. Time: 3:46 ]
|
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CBU#3: "Man...you ready to go, Guy? "
|
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CBU#1: " I dunno, man....are you? I know I can't drive, dude. "
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CBU#3: "You sure? man....I jus want to go home and sleep...."
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CBU#1: "Me too....oh....warm surface.....sleep...."
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CBU#2: "man...what were we thinking? Ohhhhhhhhhhh......Baaaaaaaaddd
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||
Shroooooooooooooooooommmmmm...."
|
||
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CBU#1: "baaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaadddddd sshhrrrrrrrrrrrrroooooommmm..."
|
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||
CBU#3: "You sure you can;t drive?"
|
||
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||
CBU#1: "Oh, man...I mean....a piss yellow Omni zipping through Richmond
|
||
with 400 pounds of shit in the back and 2 people driving on
|
||
hallucinagens. I think that would arouse suspicion.
|
||
Oooohhhhh. I'll work the steering wheel if you
|
||
work the peddles? hahaha. Ok, but your driving..."
|
||
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||
CBU#3: "Nope. I ain't driving. Man.....i gotta change a water pump
|
||
tomorrow. Oh, FUCK!
|
||
|
||
CBU#2: "Shit....I can't wait till tomorrow. Stone cold Reality is what
|
||
I need.........."
|
||
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CBU#3: "I hope when I wake up tomorrow I'm normal.....you can't drive?"
|
||
|
||
CBU#1: "Man....I'm still stuck on 6 heads...Hahahahahahaha."
|
||
|
||
A few more minutes pass......the CB Units are still stuck in Else but
|
||
realize that they aren't peeking anymore...
|
||
|
||
CBU#1: "Welp....you wanna make a break for it?"
|
||
|
||
CBU#3: "Yeah....ok...lets try..."
|
||
|
||
|
||
The CB Units quietly walk up the stairs and into the kitchen. CBU#1
|
||
grabs a cinnamon roll. The CB Units 1 & 3 leave into the realm of the
|
||
Road. CBU#2 returns to the basement and turns off all the electrical
|
||
appliances. Then goes to bed. Sleep comes around 5:30am...........
|
||
|
||
|
||
|
||
|
||
|
||
+++--- CONCLUSION ---+++
|
||
|
||
When in need a an Anchor to Reality....a Pit Bull is always there for
|
||
ya!
|
||
|
||
The Search for Surface was a long Search. But a prosperous one indeed.
|
||
All is wierd....all is unreal. These are the times that you need to
|
||
venture out into that big world (whichever it may be) and find your own
|
||
Anchor to Reality.
|
||
|
||
Stay tuned for further adventured in the Land Of Else!
|
||
Next file will be a trip to Else via the Acid Express.
|
||
Until then...........
|
||
|
||
|
||
|
||
RoR - Alucard
|
||
|
||
|
||
|
||
=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=
|
||
shroom04b
|
||
|
||
|
||
|
||
Oh my oh my. When your standing at that toll booth at the beginning of
|
||
your journey, and the man asks you for your coin....just cock your head
|
||
and give him a smirk and say, "Hey....you think your a smart ass? Well
|
||
I got a question for ya..."
|
||
|
||
"Ohuh?"
|
||
|
||
"You think you got the guts, Boothman?"
|
||
|
||
"Ohuh?"
|
||
|
||
Widen your smirk and simply say, "What's Next To The Moon?"
|
||
|
||
And while he's pondering that question in total amazment, just slip by
|
||
the gate and put the pedal to the metal. Works every time!!
|
||
|
||
|
||
-< Big-O Jet Airliner. >-
|
||
|
||
|
||
|
||
And BY CHANCE that doesn't work, just make sure you have a walkman with
|
||
you....because in this world, every being is total amazed by the sound
|
||
of Rock 'N Roll. It's a Phenomenon that can't be explained. Go
|
||
figure.
|
||
|
||
(>
|
||
|
||
|
||
Well, I've been travelling down this road for some time...it's been a
|
||
fun road. I've never had a bad time. And Wisdom I have gained, that I
|
||
have. And my book has been filled...and oh man-o-man......it's that
|
||
time again.
|
||
|
||
-< Ten Years Gone >-
|
||
|
||
|
||
I've spent alot of time floating in that black void...it makes you
|
||
wonder what the big secret is. I mean, your like a puppet under the
|
||
Blue. And there's nothing wrong with that, now is there? Four strings
|
||
coming of your limbs and all you do is dance. Dance with the
|
||
Dancer....out into the void. Follow traces...follow the light and
|
||
blend. wwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwww. Just
|
||
blend. bbbbbbbbbbbbbbbbbbbbbbbbbbbbbbbbb tttttttttttttttttt qq...
|
||
|
||
Ever wonder what the answer to Life, the Universe and all the Virgins you
|
||
can lay is?
|
||
|
||
I'll tell you...
|
||
|
||
|
||
Answer: X
|
||
|
||
|
||
HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAH HA HA HA HA HA HAHAHAHAHAHAHHAHAHA!!!
|
||
|
||
Thats what it is, Jack..... the fuckin Big Variable In The Sky!
|
||
HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!
|
||
|
||
|
||
If your reading this...then I think you should know that I am fuckin
|
||
drunk. And if you knew that, then....do you have any mushrooms?
|
||
|
||
Well, there's only one thing to do at this Point.........<gulp...>
|
||
|
||
|
||
-< Hot Summer Nights >-
|
||
|
||
(Oh yeah....and listening to the Stereo..... A massive Stereo at
|
||
that!!! Thanx to Sir Death, of course....) (Very big
|
||
speakers...very...art thou Very? )
|
||
|
||
.
|
||
(> . .
|
||
. . . ... ..
|
||
...... .. . . . . . . . .
|
||
. . . . . . . . .
|
||
.. . . . . . .
|
||
.. . .
|
||
.... ..
|
||
|
||
|
||
T I I A U L M N L E S G H H H H H H H !
|
||
H S S S B I I A M S A E A A A A A A A!
|
||
|