269 lines
12 KiB
Plaintext
269 lines
12 KiB
Plaintext
HOW TO GROW PRIMO SENSIMILLION
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BY The Folically Challenged White Dude
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at Damage Incorporated
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Get Started
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Get some pot seeds. If you haven't started now get too it. Lots of people
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save their pot seeds on a tray they stole from a cafeteria or a frisbee
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of course. No need to pay them for them. Tell them they are for a friend.
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People get busted because they tell a friend in strict confidence, who
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tells a friend in strict confidence etc etc.
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Pot Seeds
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You cannot judge a pot seed by it's cover. Squeeze a seed gently and if
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it breaks, it was harvested before the seeds matured. Get as large of a
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variety of seeds as possible. Seeds from dirt weed look sometimes just like
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the seeds of primo killer mo-jo weed, so get a large variety of seeds. Try
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not to mix them together. Lots of time people will save seeds from
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especially killer weed. Just get them already.
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Get Some Containers to Start the Seeds in.
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When you buy small flowers to plant outdoors at a garden store, save the
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6-pack plastic trays they come it. Perferrably with the plastic tray still
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underneath. Tell the neighbors who ask that you're going to start some
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pepper plants or something if you bum off others.
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Another excellent container is the 2 liter bottle with cut in half at the
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waist. These are free, a good way to recycle, and work well even for large
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plants. You can get tons on recycling day if your city recycles, or you
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can go to an apartment complex and raid the dumpsters. Don't jump in one
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though because it may be full of bees, body parts, baby shit, or diabetic
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hypodermic needles from a gay nazi elvis fan who has aids.
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Get some dirt.
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Get a large bag of top soil (not potting soil from Kmart). Get top soil at
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like a farm store the first time. Hyponex is shitty and overpriced and it
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turns into mud too easily. You want soil with balls. Use Bagged commercial
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soil for starting seeds. Wild dirt (from outside your house) is bad because
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it has bugs in it. Weed is very pest resistant and you will never have to
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spray chemicals on weed to protect it from pests other than maybe soap and
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water to rinse a few bugs off sometime. However, very young seedlings are
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VERY fragile. The worst enemy of seedlings is those little bugs that roll
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into a ball when you touch them. They are harmless to plants, probably
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beneficial to healthy plants, but they will bite the base of a seedling
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and topple it over like a little DEA lumber jack. Very bad. Get a big bag
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of soil from a garden store or farm market. NOT hyponex MUD.
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Drainage
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It's better if you allow SOME drainage from your seed starting containers.
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If you use 2 liter bottles cut in half at the waist, poke a hole in the
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bottom of each container by STABBING it violently with a sharp screw driver.
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A screw driver with the tip ground into a sharp point works great!
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If you use the regular seed starter things try using very small holes in
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the bottom tray which may already be there.
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Sprinkle in the dirt gently.
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Fill the seed starter containers with dirt, very gently, by sprinkling the
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dirt into the pots or seed starter things by holding you hand over top
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of the container and gently letting the dirt fall slowly and evenly into
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place. No need to pack the dirt, but you should sprinkle the dirt in
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such a way to break up any dirt clods or clumps before letting them fall
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into the containers. Don't fill them completely.
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Make holes for the seeds.
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Use a pencil. Perferabbly a number two pencil that says "Property Of The
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Federal Government" or a regular one if you can't get on of those. Poke
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a small hole into the soil in each seed container, maybe three holes
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if you are using 2 liter bottles.
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Make each hold no deeper than than an inch. A good way is to use a sharp
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pencil, and poke it into the soil until the soil is even with the place
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where the raw sharp wood ends and the yellow paint begins, which is
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about an inch. No rocket science required here.
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Drop in the seeds.
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Drop one, (if it's for sure killer diller shit) two or three seeds into
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each hole. Make sure your hands are dry first. A folded piece of paper
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may help if you have a ton of seeds to plant, letting the seeds roll down
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like a chute. If you miss don't panic.
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Cover the seeds.
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Again with the dirt, sprinkle a final thin covering of fine soil (no giant
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clods or turds this time please) over the entire thing so the dirt looks
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even and you can't see any of the seeds.
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Water them before putting on the covers.
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Water them good, but don't have them floating either. You want sufficient
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humidity but you don't want them to drown either. A even sprinkle with a
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watering can works great, an atomizer will take all fucking day.
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Put on the covers.
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Cover the seed starting kit with it's hard plastic cover. You may poke a few
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holes in the cover if you want so you can sprinkle water on top later and
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have water slowly drip down inside.
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If using two liters cut in half at the waist, cover them with saran wrap and
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put a piece of masking tape around to hold it down tight. Poke two or
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three small holes in the plastic with your magic pencil thing. So you
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can water them later without removing the plastic.
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Where do you set them.
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In the sun or partial sun is best, under a flouresent light is good too.
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Regular incandescent light (bulbs) is too fucking hot.
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AND ON THE DIRT, OR A TRAY TO CATCH THE DRIPPING WATER of course.
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Do NOT let them dry out. (if they're too wet mold will form)
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Get some good lights.
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High Pressure sodium lights, or metal halide lights work great. Try a
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400watt or smaller high pressure sodium or metal halide lighting setup.
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You can order them from mail order companies cheaper than you can buy
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them at the downtown electrical supply house.
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In a pinch, you can line a closet size area with tin foil and stand as
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many AND AS LONG (long is better) flourescent fixtures everywhere you
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can.
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People that grow primo pot indoors use High Pressure Sodium lights, which
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are those street lights that are orange in color. Or Metal Halide which
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a few bucks cheaper but just as good probably. Metal Halide lights are
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white in color but better qulity light than the average street light.
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Get a light that's 400 watts or less. Use care in constructing a grow
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room and you would do good to consult good books on the subject by
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Ed Rosenthal (books by phone berkeley california, call 1-800-infromation
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operator to get the Books by phone address etc.)
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Never use regular incandescent light bulbs (regular screw in) those little
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screw in grow lights they sell at Kmart suck too. Don't waste your money,
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use flourescents if you can't afford the good stuff.
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Air ventilation
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Get a small cheap fan so you always have a small amount of air circulating
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in your grow area.
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Air ventilation, safety and other stuff.
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If you grow indoors with big lights, you need safe air ventilation to
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suck heat out of the room. Don't blow up your house for christs sake.
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A thermostat controlled exhaust fan will work. Get one thrrough the
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mail from a indoor gardening mail order speciality place. There's a good
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one that's in East Lansing michican, another one in Shepherdsville Kentucky.
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Light timers.
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Get ones big enough to handle the power you are using.
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For growing plants, leave the lights on 24 hours a day.
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For flowering plants YES! use a timer so it's dark 12 hours and light
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for 12 hours.
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Fertilizer
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Use Rapid-Gro
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Fertilizer has 3 numbers on the label
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First number - Middle Number - last number
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For strong healthy growth when the lights are on 24 hours a day to
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see how big the plants can get, use a fertilizer with a high
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first number. 19-19-19 is good. etc.
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For strong flowers (buds) when the lights are on 12 and off 12 hours, use
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a fertilizer with a high MIDDLE number. 12-17-12 something like that.
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Rapid-gro fertilizer has been specially formulated for growing pot plants.
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This is no secret to pot farmers. They're high middle number fertilizer
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is called. Bud builders or something like that.
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Security
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Need to know basis. People who are stoned always tell their friends about
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their buddies grow room including location and everything. This is
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way pot growers are so fucking paranoid, they can't even trust themselves.
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Don't kill anybody I guess is the rule to follow. If you're a hillbillly
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ignoramous you probably wouldn't be able to read this though.
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When to fertilize.
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Try using regular water one watering and fertilized water the next one.
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Mix fertilzed water with one giant tablespoon per gallon (milk jug) of
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water. Water when the soil is dry and begins to crack slightly. Water
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more when starting small plants.
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Get them as big as possible.
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When they start to grow you may have to move them to bigger containers.
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However you can grow pot using fertilizer in surprising small containers,
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although they may get a little top heavy after a while. A can of house
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paint would be an ideal container size. Don't use metal containers though.
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Wait until they are root bound before transplanting. Avoid transplanting
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seedlings because they are VERY VERY fragile. Let the plants grow as
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big as possible giving them as much light as possible. Grow as many as
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possible.
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Tell them to BUD YES YES!
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When you have tons of plants growing like a fucking vietnamese jungle, it's
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time to bud them. Keep a watch out for buds even before you take them off
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24 hours of light and put them on 12/12 light/dark.
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When you're ready to start buds, the big giant leaves will have started to
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turn brown and falling off a little bit. Now is the time to put the light
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timers on 12/12 light/dark and begin to use a high middle number fertilizer.
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When giant leaves begin to fall off help them off. Save these "sun" leaves
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to smoke with your drunken buddies.
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A few days after you adjust the lights to 12/12 and the fertilizer to high
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middle number, they will start to bud. You are now ready to murder
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half of your plants.
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Kill the males.
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When you notice any plant develop male reproductive organs, cut it down by
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cutting the trunk at the base with big wire cutters. DO NOT shake the
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plant, make one clean cut and remove it gently and put it in the bottom
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of a distant closet on newspapers or something to dry out. Male sex organs
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on male plants are like little tiny bags that contain polen (plant sperm)
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that is carried by the winds when the male sex organs get mature or dry out.
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Carefully check the plants daily. Half the plants will be female. When you
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think it's time to harvest (don't ask how long, they will tell you) begin
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with the less beautiful females. Females have beautiful white flowers.
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Let the healthiest most killer looking females grow as long as possible
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and harvest VERY slowly starting with the less healthy less big budded
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females. Short Squat females are best for indoors. Tall is hard to manage.
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Pot plants range in height from 2 feet (hybrids and central asian) to
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like 18 feet for good mexican weed.
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Save a few of the best females for your personal stash. Clip only one
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healthy bud at a time. Cut the bud up with sizzors and lay it in the
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bottom of a clean wooden dresser drawer to dry. If you find a seed
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in your weed PLANT IT!
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Pretty soon people will come over all the time to bum weed. Kill them if
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possible. When you run out you will learn who your real friends are.
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This is for information purposes only (or course)
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X-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-X
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Another file downloaded from: The NIRVANAnet(tm) Seven
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& the Temple of the Screaming Electron Taipan Enigma 510/935-5845
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Burn This Flag Zardoz 408/363-9766
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realitycheck Poindexter Fortran 510/527-1662
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Lies Unlimited Mick Freen 801/278-2699
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The New Dork Sublime Biffnix 415/864-DORK
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The Shrine Rif Raf 206/794-6674
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Planet Mirth Simon Jester 510/786-6560
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"Raw Data for Raw Nerves"
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X-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-X
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