844 lines
42 KiB
Plaintext
844 lines
42 KiB
Plaintext
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{ George Carlin: nonconformist, liberal, open-minded, and by far }
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funnier than any other comedian-come-lately. His latest effort
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{ has been transcribed for your carnal [dis]pleasure. Enjoy! }
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*=-- --=*
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{ the }
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-=*/> Buzzz Bros. <\*=-
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present
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_____________
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AN INCOMPLETE LIST OF IMPOLITE WORDS:
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2,443 FILTHY WORDS AND PHRASES
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Part I
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Compiled By George Carlin
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______________
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Text Entry by Havoc
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{ }
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*=-- --=*
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Note
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------
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During the nearly twenty years since the "Seven Words You Can Never Say On
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Television" first appeared on the Class Clown album, and especially since the
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time (1982) when the idea was expanded to include impolite expressions of all
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types, TV-banned or otherwise, hundreds of people have sent me suggestions on
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words and phrases which they thought ought to be included on the list. Some
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sent single items, while others submitted long lists they had obviously taken
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some trouble to compile. I wish now I had kept a record of their names. Not
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knowing I would one day attempt this project, my practice at the time was to add
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the submitted entries to my "filth" folder, send the person a few autographed
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items (albums, pictures, videos, shirts) in appreciation, and discard the
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original letters. I wish I had handled it differently so that I could give them
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credit here. But, of course, the real credit belongs to the thousands of people
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over the centuries who invented these phrases in the first place, folk poets,
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all. To those who sent me their suggestions, you know who you are, and I thank
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you from the bottom of my farting clapper.
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George Carlin
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Male Genitals
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---------------
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aaron's rod arm
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baby-maker beef
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blue vein meatroll bald-headed butler
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bald-headed mouse belly buster
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bathtub eel bearded blood sausage
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bird bone
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baloney banana
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bat bayonet
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bean tosser beef
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belly ruffian blade
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broomstick bum tickler
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bush beater button-hole worker
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cock candle
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carrot club
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crack haunter cranny hunter
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cracksman creamstick
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culty gun carnal stump
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chicken child-getter
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chink-stopper corey
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crook dick
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dork dong
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doniker dingus
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dipstick dagger
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dart of love dearest member
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dickey ding-dong
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dinger dingle-dangle
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dummy dodaddy
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dolly dooflicker
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down-leg dragon
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eel end
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family organ fiddle bow
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fish fishing rod
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flapper fool-sticker
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forefinger fucker
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foreman gun
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gut wrench giggle stick
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gadget gardener
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giggling pin gooser
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gravy maker grinding tool
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gristle gut stick
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hair splitter hambone
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hammer hanging johnny
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hoe handle holy poker
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horn hose
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hot rod heat-seeking moisture missle
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hairy hot dog jack in the box
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jemson jerking iron
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jigger jing hang
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jockam johnnie
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johhny one-eye the bald-headed champ
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johnson joint
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joy knob joy prong
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joy stick key
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kidney cracker kielbasa
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king member knob
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knocker ladies' delight
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ladies' lollipop ladies' treasure
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lamp of life lance
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life preserver little brother
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little willie liver turner
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live sausage lizard
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lob lobcock
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lobster lollypop
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long john love dart
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love gun love missile
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lucy lung disturber
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mad mick magic wand
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man-root marrow bone
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master john thursday master of ceremonies
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meat meat hook
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meat whistle member
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merry maker middle leg
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milkman mister goodwrench
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mister tom mouse
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muscle mutton dagger
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my body's captain natural scythe
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needle nimrod
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nippy noodle
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noony old blind rob
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one-eyed night crawler in the turtle neck sweater
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one-eyed milkman one-eyed trouser trout
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one-eyed wonder worm pant muscle
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pecker pee-pee
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pen pencil
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pendulum perch
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peter piccolo
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pike staff pile driver
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pin pink pencil
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pipe pisser
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pistol plugtail
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pocket piccolo pocket rocket
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pointer poker
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pole pork
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pork sword post
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prick pride and joy
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prong pud
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pudding pump handle
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purple-helmeted warrior of love
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pup putz
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quickening peg quimstake
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ram ramrod
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rawmeat reamer
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redcap rod
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rod of love rolling pin
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root rudder
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rupert russell the wonder muscle
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st. peter salami
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sausage sceptre
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schlong sexing piece
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shaft shmock
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short arm shove devil
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shvontz silent flute
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skin flute snake
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spigot spike-faggot
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spindle split-rump
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spout staff
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steaming hot kanga stem
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stick sting
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stump sugar stick
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sword tail pin
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tally-whacker tassel
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tent-peg thing
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third leg thistler
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throbber throbbing python of love
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tickle-gizzard tickler
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tong tool
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torch of cupid toy
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trap-stick trouser anaconda
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tube steak uncle dick
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vomiting cobra wand
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wang wazoo
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weapon wedge
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wheenie wacker
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whip whistle
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whore-pipe wick
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willie winkle
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wire worm
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yang yard
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yosh zubrick
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Well-Endowed (male)
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Basket for days donkey-rigged
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double-shung hung like a bull
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miracle meat timbered
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tons of basket tons of meat
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well-favored by nature well hung
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yard
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Semen
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baby food baby juice
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bull gravy buttermilk
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chism come
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cream crud
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cum duck butter
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fetch glue
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gravy hockey
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honey hot milk
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jam jazz
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jelly jism
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jizz juice
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letch water load
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love liquor man oil
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marrow mettle
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milk oil of man
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ointment oyster
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prick juice pudding
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scum seed
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slime soap
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spendings sperm
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spew spratz
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spume spunk
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starch stuff
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tail juice tail water
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tallow wad
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white blow white honey
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Semen Related
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pearl necklace pecker tracks
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wet dream
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Ejaculate
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big bang bust your nuts
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come come off
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cream cum
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die in a woman's lap drop your load
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fire a shot get off
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get the dirty water off your chest
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get wet get your cookies
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get your jollies get your rocks off
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go off number three
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pop a nut shoot
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shoot off shoot your wad
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spend squirt
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Testicals
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ballocks balls
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bangers beecham's pills
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bird's eggs boo-boos
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charlies cherries
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chestnuts clangers
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cojones cubes
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danglers eggs
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family jewels glands
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goolies jewels
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kanakas love apples
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marbles marshmallows
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nards nuts
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onions plums
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pounders rocks
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seeds slashers
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spunk holders squirrel
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food stones
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swingers
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Scrotum
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ball bag hairy bag
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poke sack
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Crab Lice
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active citizens crabs
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crotch crickets gentlemen's companions
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neighbors to the south pants rabbits
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seam squirrels
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Syphllis
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coachman on the box french gout
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irish mutton ladies' fever
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lifelong friend neapoliton bone ache
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old joe siff
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spanish needle the old dog
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Gonorrhea
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buner clap
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dose gleet
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glim haircut
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lues lulu
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morning drop piss pins and needles
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piss pure cream stank cock
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strain tear
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Female Genitals
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-----------------
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ace of spades adam's cave
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altar of love bearded clam
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beaver belly entrance
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black bess bluebeard's closet
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box brown madam
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bull's eye bunny
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bush button hole
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cabbage patch canal
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candle holder cat's meat
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cave of harmony cavern
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cellar door chocha
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cleft clutch
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cockpit cookie
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coot cooch
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cooze coupler
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crack cranny
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crease crevice
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crotch crumpet
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cunny cunny
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cunt dimple
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divine scar donut
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drain eel-skinner
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fish tank fort bushy
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front window fur
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furbox furburger
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furrow gap
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gaper gash
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gate of heaven ginch
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ginny girl-street
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goat-milker gravy-maker
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gully-hole hair
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haircourt hair pie
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happy valley harbour of hope
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hatch hog eye
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hole honey-hive
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honey-pot horse collar
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hot box hot spot
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house under the hill irish fortune
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itching jenny jack nasty-face
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jaxy jelly-role
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juice box keyhole
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lady jane lamp of love
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lapland lather-maker
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little mary locker
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long-eye love tunnel
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lower lips magpie's nest
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main vein manhole
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mark of the beast meat
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meat grinder mom's homemade slit pie
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mound mount pleasant
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mouse mouth-that-cannot-bite
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muff naf
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nature's tufted treasure nest
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niche nook
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nooky notch
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oat-bin old mossyface
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organ grinder oven
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oyster catcher patch
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pelt penwiper
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pie piece
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pin cushion pipe cleaner
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piss flaps pit
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playpen pocker
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poke hole poontang
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poor man's blessing prick purse
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pussy quiff
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quim quiver
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rose screw-hole
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slash slit
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slot snapper
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snappin' pussy snatch
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snatch-box stank
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steam room stuff
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socket sportsman's gap
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sugar basin tail
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temple of low men tool-chest
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toy shop treasure chest
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trench triangle
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trim tube
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tuna taca tunnel
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tunnel of love twat
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tweeze twitcher
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vag valley
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venus highway vertical smile
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wet cave of lust wooly-burger
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works yawnie
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yum-yum
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Female Genitals (related)
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boy-in-the-boa Female Genitals (related)
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boy-in-the-boa Female Genitals (related)
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---------------------------
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boy-in-the-boa Female Genitals (related)
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boy-in-the-boat bush
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button cherry
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clamp clit
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clitty cleopatra
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lady's low toupee lather
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letch-water love juice
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man-in-the-canoe merkin
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mugget pussy fart
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vaginal blood fart
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Breasts
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apples balcony
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balloons bangers
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bazongas bean bags
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big brown eyes bon-bons
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boobies boobs
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bottles boulders
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bullets busters
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bumpers butterbags
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cantelopes gazongas
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glands globes
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grapefruits guavas
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handful hand-warmers
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headers headlights
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hills honkers
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hooters howitizers
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jaboos jibs
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jugs jumbos
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kazongas knobs
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knockers lactoids
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loaves loblollies
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love bubbles love muffins
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lulus lungs
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mammets mams
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mangoes meatballs
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meat loaves melons
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milk cans milkshop
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mounds mount of lillies
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mountains muffins
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mulligans murphies
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nancies nature's fonts
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niblets ninnies
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nippers nodules
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noogies nubbies
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nuts oranges
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orbs ottomans
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pair nuts oranges
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orbs ottomans
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pair palookas
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papayas paps
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peaches peaks
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pears pects
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peepers pillows
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pips pokers
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pontoons potatoes
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pumpkins pumps
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rib cushions roundies
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sandbags scones
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scoops set
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shakers shimmies
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skin sacks snuggle pups
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spheres spuds
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stacks stuffing
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sweater meat sweet rools
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swingers tamales
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tetons tidbits
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tits titters
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titties tomatoes
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tooters torpedoes
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twangers twin peaks
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twofers umlauts
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upper deck waldos
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warheads warts
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watermelons whoppers
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wobblers wongas
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yabbos yams
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zeppelins
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Menstruation
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--------------
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aunt flo aunt rosie is in town
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all's not quiet on the waterfront
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blood week collywobbles
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curse of eve drip
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entertain the general fall off the roof
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flying the flag having the painters in
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high tide holy week
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jinx little sister is here
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monthlies my buddy
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my friend on the bun
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on the pole on the rag
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period problem
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ragging ragtime
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red flag red sails in the sunset
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riding the cotton bicycle riding the cotton pony
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road up for repairs sick
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stop sign tail flowers
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that time that way
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the captain is at home the curse
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the foe the hammock is swinging
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the plague the thing
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the visitor turns
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wearing the bulky roll woman's home companion
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Sanitary Napkin
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-----------------
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bandage clout
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cuntrag fanny rag
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flag granny rag
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manhole cover mouth mattress
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muck rag pleasure garden padlock
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rag red flag
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window blinds
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Pregnant
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----------
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about-to-find-pups apron up
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baby-bound bagged
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belly up big with child
|
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broken-kneed clucky
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cocked-up coming fresh
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delicate condition double-ribbed
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fragrant full of heir
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gone to seed have a dumpling
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have one in the oven have one's cargo aboard
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in a family way in pod
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in the pudding club in trouble
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knocked up loaded
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looking piggy on the bones
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P.G. pillowed
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preggers preggy
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shot in the giblets storked
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stung by a serpent swallowed a watermelon seed
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up and coming up the stick
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wedged up with squirrel
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Fornication
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-------------
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a bit of jam action
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ball ballock
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boloney ride bananas and cream
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bang basket making
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batter beef
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beef injection be in a woman's beef
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belly ride belt
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blanket drill blow off the loose corns
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board boff
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bone bore
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bottle bounce
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bump bump fur
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bunny stick burry one's wick
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bury the bone bush patrol
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buzz the brillo cane
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change one's luck charge
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chuck a tread climb
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cock up come across
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couple with cover
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crack it cram
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crawl cream
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cut dance the mattress jig
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daub of the brush dick
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dicky dunk diddle
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dig your stinger in the honey dip your stick
|
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dip your wick dirty work at the crossroads
|
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do do a dive in the dark
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do a flop do a push
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do a slide up the board dog
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do it do the deed
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do the nasty ease nature
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exchange spit feather-bed jig
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feed the dummy fiddle
|
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firk fit end to end
|
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fix her plumbing flesh session
|
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flop flop in the hay
|
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four-legged frolic frig
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fuck fun and games
|
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get a bit get a chunk
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get a crumpet get a hunk
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get a little get a piece
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get a snipper get a wet one
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get home get in
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get into her pants get into some serious flesh
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get it on get jack in the orchard
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get laid get lucky
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get one's ashes hauled get one's greens
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get one's leather stretched get one's noodle wet
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get one's oil changed get some
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get some action get some ass
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get some crack get some hair
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get some hole get some pussy
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get some stuff get some tail
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get some tweeze get your bean waxed
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get your pole varnished give her a stab
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go all the way go like a belt-fed motor
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go to bed with go to it
|
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go to town go vaulting
|
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grease the wheel grind
|
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grind on'e tool hanky-panky
|
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have have a bit
|
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have a bit of giblet pie have a bit of summer cabbage
|
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have a blow through have sex with
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hide the ferret hide the salami
|
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hit on the tail hock
|
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hop on horizontal refreshment
|
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hose hot roll with cream
|
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hump impale
|
|
introduce charlie invade
|
|
irish whist jazz
|
|
jink job
|
|
join paunches jounce
|
|
joy ride jug
|
|
juke jump
|
|
jump on one's bones knock
|
|
knock off a piece know
|
|
ladies' tailoring lay
|
|
lay off with lay some pipe
|
|
lay the hip lay some leg
|
|
leap leap on
|
|
lie lie with
|
|
lob in love
|
|
make make feet for childrens shoes
|
|
make it make love
|
|
make out with make the scene
|
|
making babies makin' whoopie
|
|
mate mess around
|
|
mingle limbs mix one's peanut butter
|
|
mount mugg
|
|
muss nail
|
|
mail two bellies together nick
|
|
nib nig
|
|
nub nut
|
|
oblige off
|
|
park your yacht in the hair harbor
|
|
peel one's best end peg
|
|
perform pestle
|
|
piece piece of ass
|
|
piece of pussy piece of snatch
|
|
piece of tail pile
|
|
pile-driving pin
|
|
plant the oats play at all fours
|
|
play hide the bone plow
|
|
pluck plug
|
|
pocket the red poke
|
|
pole pole work
|
|
polish your rocket pop
|
|
pork post a letter
|
|
pound pump
|
|
punch push
|
|
put the boots to put the tool in the shed
|
|
quimsticking ram
|
|
ride rip off
|
|
rites of venus roasting the broomstick
|
|
roll roll in the hay
|
|
rock rod
|
|
roger romp
|
|
root rootle
|
|
roust rub bacons
|
|
rub up rumble
|
|
rumple rutting
|
|
salt saw off a chunk
|
|
score screw
|
|
scutz around secret services
|
|
service shack up
|
|
crew
|
|
scutz around secret services
|
|
service shack up
|
|
shaft shag
|
|
shake shake the sheets
|
|
shoot between wind and water shoot one's wad
|
|
short arm practice shove
|
|
shtup sink the sausage
|
|
sink the soldier slam
|
|
sleep with slip her a length
|
|
slip into split
|
|
spoil suattin' on the hog
|
|
squat jumps in the cucumber patch
|
|
squeeze and a squirt stab
|
|
stable my naggie strop one's beak
|
|
strum stuff
|
|
swing tail-work
|
|
take a turn in the stubble take a turn on shooter's hill
|
|
tear off a piece tear the sheets
|
|
the disappearing cane trick the matrimonial polka
|
|
thread thread the needle
|
|
throw a hump throw a leg over
|
|
throw a shot thump
|
|
tie the true lover's knot tiff
|
|
tip the long one to be intimate
|
|
tooling in the woods tops and bottoms
|
|
trim trim the buff
|
|
trip up the rhine tumble
|
|
tumple turn up
|
|
twiddle varnish one's cane
|
|
vault vitamin F
|
|
wap wham
|
|
what mother did before me wind the clock
|
|
womanize work
|
|
work out work the dumb oracle
|
|
work the hairy oracle yard
|
|
yentz
|
|
|
|
|
|
Sexual Arousal (both sexes)
|
|
-----------------------------
|
|
|
|
blotty brimming
|
|
bulging cockish
|
|
dripping for it feeling hairy
|
|
frisky fuckish
|
|
gamy hairy
|
|
horny hot
|
|
hot-assed hot and bothered
|
|
hot nuts hot pants
|
|
humpy in the mood
|
|
in season itchy pants
|
|
juiced up juicy
|
|
lathered moist
|
|
motor running on for one's greens
|
|
oncoming pruning
|
|
ramish randy
|
|
ready rooty
|
|
ruttish sexed up
|
|
tumbling ripe turned on
|
|
up wet
|
|
|
|
|
|
Sexually Fixated
|
|
------------------
|
|
|
|
cock-happy cunny haunted
|
|
cunt-struck
|
|
|
|
|
|
Testaglia
|
|
-----------
|
|
|
|
blue balls hot rocks
|
|
love nuts lover's nuts
|
|
stone ache
|
|
|
|
|
|
Condom
|
|
--------
|
|
|
|
balloon cheater
|
|
close combat sock diving suit
|
|
drop catcher eel skin
|
|
fear-not french letter
|
|
gasket joybag
|
|
one-piece overcoat pipe pullover
|
|
port said garter raincoat
|
|
rubber rubber glove
|
|
safe scumbag
|
|
sheath showercap
|
|
tail sheath
|
|
|
|
|
|
Erection
|
|
----------
|
|
|
|
bone boner
|
|
bone on burgeoning truncheon
|
|
captain standfish flagpole
|
|
hard hard-on
|
|
horn in one's best clothes
|
|
irish toothache mean-on
|
|
morning pride old hornington
|
|
on the stand pants pusher
|
|
piss hard piss proud
|
|
prod proud below the navel
|
|
proud mary rail
|
|
riser rise in the levi's
|
|
rod-on rock python
|
|
spike stalk
|
|
standing ware stand-up
|
|
stiff stiffer
|
|
steely dan sporting a sequoiya
|
|
throbber woody
|
|
|
|
|
|
Illegitimate Child
|
|
--------------------
|
|
|
|
accident adulterine
|
|
babe of love bachelor's son
|
|
bar steward bastard
|
|
born out of wedlock bush colt
|
|
bye-blow catch colt
|
|
chance-born chance child
|
|
hasty pudding love child
|
|
merry-begotton child misbegotten
|
|
momzer natural
|
|
nephew niece
|
|
out-child side wind
|
|
single child son of a bitch
|
|
squeaker stall whimper
|
|
whoreson yard child
|
|
|
|
________________________
|
|
|
|
End of Part I
|
|
Continued in BB file #14
|
|
|
|
-=*/> Buzzz Bros. <\*=-
|
|
(c) MCMXCI
|
|
________________________
|
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