102 lines
4.7 KiB
Plaintext
102 lines
4.7 KiB
Plaintext
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Conspiracy Nation -- Vol. 8 Num. 36
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======================================
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("Quid coniuratio est?")
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"CONSPIRACY NATION" HAS NO FRIENDS
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==================================
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Having just received an e-mail from a reader whose signature
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informs me he is a "journalist" -- in other words, a "real"
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corporate journalist and not like *you*, Conspiracy Nation,
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likely to say who knows what -- in which I was warned that unless
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I made things crystal clear to this fellow, he was going to stop
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reading Conspiracy Nation, I responded in two words: "F*** y**."
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I bet this tweedy fellow about sh** in his pants. Hmm... I
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wonder if he will cancel?
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Mr. Prim and Proper warned that he "didn't like the tone" of my
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"What is Satire" essay. Furthermore, he entered his complaint to
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yours truly, the Complaint Department, that he is in a huff about
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Professor Orlin Grabbe's recent essay, "An Apology and Good-Bye".
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Warned this fellow: "Give me hard news -- no satire -- or else I
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will stop reading Conspiracy Nation."
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Of course, if he does quit reading, that will mean 100 less Green
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Stamps that I get from the Green Stamp people based on how many
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readers there are. And being *that* *close* to having put
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together enough Green Stamp books that I can finally get the
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patio furniture my heart is so set on, his warning, I confess,
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put great fear into my heart.
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But then I remembered something Joseph Pulitzer said in 1904.
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Pulitzer had a newspaper called the New York World. He asked a
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judge of his acquaintance what he thought of the New York World:
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JUDGE: "It is a great paper. But it has one defect."
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PULITZER: "What is that?"
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JUDGE: "It never stands by its friends."
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PULITZER: "A newspaper should have no friends."
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Which means Conspiracy Nation is not a popularity contest.
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Conspiracy Nation is ugly, needs a shave, and scowls a lot. It
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is not like those chirpy bubbly fellows and gals you get on the
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television, the ones that will gladly kiss your ass with a smile.
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Conspiracy Nation feels free to carry articles by that nasty
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Orlin Grabbe fellow, the one that's always so downbeat and
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cynical and all.
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Conspiracy Nation *will* continue to carry articles by that
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dreadful Sherman Skolnick. Yes, the guy is just so *gauche*, and
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yes his father was a garment worker, and yes he "lacks schooling"
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and all that -- but it's just that, for *some* reason, people are
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interested in what he has to say.
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Conspiracy Nation notes that some readers feel our use of satire
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harms our "credibility". "Please, no satire, or else I will stop
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reading what you send out," say these Lords and Ladies.
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Conspiracy Nation notes the buzz that one poster declares
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outright that we are "no longer credible." (Gasp. Conformity is
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even creeping into the "patriot" movement.)
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But credibility means "to believe" and our position has *never*
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been blind belief but rather "food for thought". We want you to
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think. We don't want you to "believe".
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Final note: the Editor-in-Chief is a wild man, but thankfully,
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middle age has mellowed him out a bit. Even so, he is apt to do
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"outrageous" things, things that "journalists" from calm, staid,
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"credible" corporate-backed outlets -- the "good" little boys and
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girls -- would just absolutely never ever do.
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So you say you're gonna cancel? Bye. Good luck. Happy trails.
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I encourage distribution of "Conspiracy Nation."
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If you would like "Conspiracy Nation" sent to your e-mail
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address, send a message in the form "subscribe cn-l My Name" to
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listproc@cornell.edu (Note: that is "CN-L" *not* "CN-1")
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For information on how to receive the improved Conspiracy
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Nation Newsletter, send an e-mail message to bigred@shout.net
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Want to know more about Whitewater, Oklahoma City bombing, etc?
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(1) telnet prairienet.org (2) logon as "visitor" (3) go citcom
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See also: http://www.europa.com/~johnlf/cn.html
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See also: ftp.shout.net pub/users/bigred
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Aperi os tuum muto, et causis omnium filiorum qui pertranseunt.
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Aperi os tuum, decerne quod justum est, et judica inopem et
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pauperem. -- Liber Proverbiorum XXXI: 8-9
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