187 lines
2.5 KiB
Plaintext
187 lines
2.5 KiB
Plaintext
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%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%
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% %
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% FISHING WITH DEPTH CHARGES %
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% ========================== %
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% WRITTEN BY THE BLUE BUCCANEER %
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% %
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% DEDICATED TO SHADOWSPAWN %
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% %
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%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%
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THIS FILE WILL MERELY EXPLAIN HOW
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YOU CAN GO FISHING QUICKLY, CATCH A
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HELL OF A LOT OF FISH IN A SHORT TIME
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AND WITH MINIMAL EFFORT, AND <OF
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COURSE> BY USE OF AN EXPLOSIVE DEVICE!
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<NO FUN OTHERWISE, RIGHT!?>
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NORMALLY WHEN YOU GO FISHING WITH
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AN EXPLOSIVE DEVICE <NORMALLY!?>, YOU
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WOULD SIMPLY CHUCK A CLUSTER OF M-80S
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OR A FOURTH OF A STICK OF DYNAMITE
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INTO THE WATER AND WATCH THE FISH COME
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FLOATING UP. THEN YOU WOULD SCOOP
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THEM OFF THE TOP OF THE WATER AND MAKE
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HASTE IN YOUR EXIT BEFORE SOMEONE
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COMES TO SEE WHAT THE HELL THAT BOOM
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WAS.
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ANOTHER WAY IS THIS. YOU WILL NEED THE
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FOLLOWING LIST OF MATERIALS:
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[1] JAR <OR CAN> <WITH LID>
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[2] A LITTLE SODIUM
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[3] A NAIL
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[4] A BUNCH OF COTTON BALLS
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FIRST - CLEAN OUT THE JAR <OR CAN>.
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MAKE SURE THERE IS NO MOISTURE
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LEFT IN IT.
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SECOND - PLACE THE SODIUM IN THE
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BOTTOM OF THE JAR <OR CAN>.
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THIRD - PACK THE REST OF THE JAR <OR
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CAN> WITH THE COTTON BALLS.
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THE AMOUNT OF COTTON BALLS
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BETWEEN THE OPENING AND THE
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SODIUM WILL DETERMINE THE
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LENGTH OF TIME BEFORE THE
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BOOM.
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FOURTH - IF YOU'RE USING A JAR, PUNCH
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A FEW HOLES <WITH THE NAIL>
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IN THE LID. NOT A LOT, JUST
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A FEW. (THE MORE HOLES, THE
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FASTER IT GOES BOOM).
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FIFTH - WRAP IN AN AIR-TIGHT PLASTIC
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BAG UNTIL YOU'RE READY TO USE
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IT.
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SIXTH - TOSS IT INTO THE WATER WHERE
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YOU WISH TO DEPTH CHARGE FOR
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FISH <OR WHATEVER. IT WILL
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THROW UP ABOUT EVERYTHING.>
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MAKE SURE THE WATER IS DEEP
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ENOUGH, BECAUSE IF IT AIN'T
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YOU WILL GET HURT <<BAD>>.
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SEVENTH - COLLECT WHATEVER FLOATS
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(PUTTING IT MILDLY) TO THE
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SURFACE..
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<< AFTER THE EXPLOSION, YOU IDIOT!! >>
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IF IT SHOULD FAIL TO GO OFF DO NOT
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STICK AROUND... LEAVE IT!
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EIGTH - LEAVE THE AREA. FISHING IN
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THIS MANNOR HAPPENS TO BE
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ILLEGAL.
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[: NOTE :] THESE SHOULD NEVER BE USED
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IN SWIMMING POOLS OR AREAS WITH
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HAPPY FISHING... <OR HUNTING>
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+-+-+-+-+-+-+-+-+-+-+-+-+-+-+-+-+-+-+
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