245 lines
9.7 KiB
Plaintext
245 lines
9.7 KiB
Plaintext
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Anti-Boredom Activities
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Summary : 44 things to do when you're
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bored.
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Written By Shooting Shark.
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Uploaded to The Party Line by
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Dr.Dolittle
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Preface : Everyone's putting out these
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files, right? So, I thought I might as
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well release one, since I generally like
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to write t-files.
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Phone Stuff
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Call a sweep tone or similar obnoxious
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number, then call people at random with
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three-way.
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Call some hacker friends and tell them to
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call you back in an hour, because you
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think you're going to be busted.
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Forward your calls to the police
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department.
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Call Kentucky Fried Chicken and ask "Do
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you have extra crispy breasts?"
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Look up "Mary Stewart" or something in
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the phone book. Call this number and
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ask for Mary. If they say "she's not
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here", yell "Well where the hell IS that
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bitch?"
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Ask to use your neighbor's phone. Call
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911 and put the phone down. Leave.
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Sibling Meanness
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----------------
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If you have at least two (younger)
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brothers or sisters, wait until they go
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to bed, then move them to each other's
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beds.
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If you have just one little brother or
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sister, put s/he in the bathtub.
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Mall Stuff
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Drive down to your local mall and...
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Stroll into a Radio Shack. Walk up to
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a Color Computer and enter:
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10 CLS
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20 FOR P = 1 TO 30000 : NEXT P
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30 S = INT(255 * RND(1)) + 1
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40 SOUND (S,50)
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RUN
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turn the volume ALL the way up (if the
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tv is hooked up to an amplifier,
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all the better) and leave the store...
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Go into a toy or hobby store and ask to
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demo a nice powerful remote-control car.
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Stand at the entrance of the hobby store
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and ram the car into shoppers.
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At the same store, play with one of
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those robots where whatever you say into
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the handset is echoed through the
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robot's speaker. Hide somewhere within
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the store and position the robot at the
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front of the store. Proposition women
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who walk by.
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Still at the mall, light off an M-80 and
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yell "Look out, he's got a gun!"
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Go up to some payfones. Place a collect
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call to the fone next to you.
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Go into a Fredrick's or other large
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lingerie store. Pretend you're looking
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for something to buy for your
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girlfriend. Pick up a pair of
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crotchless panties (or a similar item)
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and ask them to model it for you.
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Have them model stuff all night, or
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until they catch on that you're not
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going to buy anything.
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Bring a porno movie. Go into Video
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Concepts and play it on the 40"
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projection TV that's in front of the
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store.
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Go to Mrs. Field's Cookies, buy a dozen
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large, flat cookies. Go back to Video
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Concepts and put them in the CD players.
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Go to Macy's, or Emporium Capwells, etc.
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and knock the lingerie off the
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manequins. On the female mannequins
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that are completely dressed, open the
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blouses to the waists.
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Go to Brennan's or Matthew's and ask the
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salesmen if they know they have 200 watt
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amps hooked up to 100 watt capacity
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speakers.
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Bring some condoms (fresh or used) and
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casually drop them into shopper's bags.
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Or, leaving them on the floor is fine.
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Stand around a part of the mall where a
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lot of people walk by. Tell them "Your
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sock's untied."
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Go to the mall's pet store. Put
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powdered jello in the fish tanks.
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Go to B. Dalton or Waldenbooks. Pick up
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some issues of Penthouse. Relocate them
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among the children's books.
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Bring some crutches. Take off your
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shoe. Walk around with the crutches,
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keeping your leg stiff.
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Make someone think they bumped into you.
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Fall over and scream in pain.
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Go to the cutlery store and ask them if
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they have 4-foot ninja blades.
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Make up some signs that say "Please Use
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Other Door" and put them everywhere.
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Bring your own blank price tags and a
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pen...
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Other Stuff
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Get or make some fake explosives (red
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tubes tied to an alarm clock, with some
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assorted wires sticking out, or a fake
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grenade will do) and drive down to a 7-11.
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Run into the store, say "Here, catch!"
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to the clerk.
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Throw them the fake bomb and run out of
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the store quickly.
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Go through the Burger King
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drive-through. Order about twenty
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dollars worth of Whoppers, Fries,
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Drinks, etc. When she says "will that
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be all for you?", say "oh yeah, I'd like
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some Chicken McNuggets, too...". When
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she says "I'm sorry, we don't have
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those..." etc, tell her to forget it and
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drive off.
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Get a suction dart gun. Shoot darts at
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your cat.
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Shoot darts at the TV.
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Get your dad's staple gun out of the
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garage. Take it down to Safeway and
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put staples in the bread.
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Put yellow dye in the swimming pool.
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Chocolate syrup is also interesting.
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Slap "KKK and Proud" bumber stickers on
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your niebhor's cars.
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If your neighbor has a "Le Car", pop a
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tire and write "Le Flat" above it.
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Grab a can of metallic purple spray
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paint and go at your neighbors citrus
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tree.
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Go down to Main Street. Bring some
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chalk and draw sillouettes of bodies on
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the sidewalk. A little fake blood can
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be added for realism. Draw a sillouette
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of a gun.
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Buy some Wondra hand lotion
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(which is off-white) and put it on
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doorknobs, gas pump handles, etc.
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Walk to your local gas station late at
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night. Re-arrange the metal numbers on
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the price signs.
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Go to a church and rearrange the letters
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on the marquee. Remember that GOD
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anagrams into DOG. If there is a sign
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saying "Christmas Dinner" take out the
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"m".
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Make a water-based dye. Paint your dog
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polka-dotted. (Don't do this to your
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cat because he will lick off the dye and
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get very sick. Save this for your
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neighor's cat.)
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Use a little bleach and give your dog
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some vertical stripes.
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Go out to the country and push cows over.
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(This is really fun.)
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Throw a rubber 4-square ball off a
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freeway overpass.
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That's It!
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Written 23 March 1986 By Shooting Shark.
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Remember that name...
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