279 lines
18 KiB
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279 lines
18 KiB
Plaintext
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| The School Stopper's Textbook |
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| A Guide To Disruptive Revolutionary Tactics for High-Schoolers |
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| Written by unknown members of the Youth International Party (The Yippies) |
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| Reformatted for 80 columns by: /\/oo\/\ Count Nibble /\/oo\/\ |
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| From a text file originally typed by MONTY PYTHON |
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The following section is reprinted from the 'School Stoppers Textbook', a
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small section of the 'How to Revolt Handbook', the fourth book of.... 'The
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Blacklisted News', available for 13 bucks from the Youth International Party
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(Yippies). OK here we go . . . 81 ways to trash your school.
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Liberate your life -- smash your school! The public schools are slowly
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killing every kid in them, stifling their creativity and individuality making
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them into non-persons. If you are a victim of this one of the things you can
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do is fight back.
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This chapter is not written for people who are not yet sure whether
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school is good or bad. It is written for students that realize the way that
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compulsory education and grades destroy the natural curiosity so many children
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feel ... who realize how the tracking system keeps the poor people and
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minorities in our society on the bottom while keeping the rich and powerful on
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the top ... who realize the danger of teaching complete obedience to authority
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and who are fed up with the racism and sexism in schools. It is written for
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students who have 'gone through channels' trying to correct these problems and
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who are tired of helplessly waiting while the schools destroy more and more
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minds each day. It is written for young people who realize that because they
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are trapped in school they don't have a chance to learn what they need to know
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to create a free and good life.
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Before trying any of the ideas in here you should think about the effect
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they will have in view of the situation in your particular area. Not all of
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them will be effective at all times in all areas. If you think of other ideas
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please send them to us so we can print them in future editions. (YIP address
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is same as Overthrow mag. in general section -sysop II)
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---------------
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WHAT YOU CAN DO
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---------------
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1. Get a syringe (minus needle) or similar device. Mix both tubes of epoxy
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glue with a little rubbing alcohol. You now have about half an hour to
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fill locks, door jambs, etc. before glue hardens. If you can't get the
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epoxy glue and syringe a tube of airplane cement can also be used
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although it is not as permanent.
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2. An alternative use for the syringe is to pretend to shoot up while a
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teacher is watching. If they speak to you tell them you have to do it
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because school is so horrible.
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3. Call the school and leave the phone off the hook. The way some (but not
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all) phone systems work this will tie up their phone for as long as yours
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is off the hook.
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4. Protest U.S. aid to reactionary regimes abroad by defoliating plants
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around the school or by digging a bomb crater on the front lawn. When
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the ecology freaks complain ask them where they were when the U.S. was
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doing the same thing to Indochina.
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5. Draw or paste something 'obscene' on pull-down wall maps or movie screens.
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6. Get some of the punch cards that your school uses for taking attendance.
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Punch new holes in them either with a keypunch machine or a screwdriver.
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Then switch the cards with others wherever they are stored. If you can
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figure out the code the cards are punched by this has even more
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possibilities. You can often be just as effective without actually
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repunching the cards by redistributing them a few days after you collect
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them (particularly when they're used for attendence).
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7. Start an information service to get new students opinions and warnings
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about the teachers and administrators before enrollment day.
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8. Bad food? Have a good old fashioned food riot.
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9. In gym classes or in hallways between classes have massive searches for
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'lost' contact lenses telling people not to walk through the hall or 'you
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might step on it'.
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10. If your school still has a dress code protest it having everyone do
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something disruptive that does not violate the code. For example, dye
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your hair green with food coloring.
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11. Free all the animals in the biology classroom.
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12. Write a 'consumer report' on the 'education' you've been consuming.
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Distribute it to parents at school functions.
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13. Periodically have students go to the office to have some rumor confirmed
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or denied.
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14. Perform citizen's arrests of administrators for destroying the minds of
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youth then telephone the police to come and take the criminals into
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custody. (This would be an excellent guerilla theatre action).
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15. Rip off dishes and silverware from the cafeteria, towels from the gym,
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stencils and paper from the duplicating room, layout equipment from the
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art and drafting departments, tools from the wood shop, and light bulbs
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from the sockets. Give them to a needy movement group.
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16. During lunch turn on and light all the gas jets in the science labs.
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17. Demand to see your school records on file. (Everyone can see them.)
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18. You can make a very effective fuse by inserting a non-filter cigarette in
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a book of matches so that it touches the head of some matches and will
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ignite them when it burns down that far. Then loosly crumple paper
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around the matches and cigarettes so that they are hidden. Toss it in a
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wastebasket or any other area with a lot of papers preferrably in the
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office. It takes about 5 minutes to ignite -- by then you can be on the
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other side of the building. Practice this at home before trying it.
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19. Have giant coughing or sneezing epidemics in class or study hall.
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20. Rub lipstick, glue, vaseline, or shit onto the doorknobs of the school's
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administrative offices.
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21. Swallow some snake bite antidote then walk into the principal's office.
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The antidote (most types are harmless -- make sure you get that kind)
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will make you vomit. Do so all over his carpet, desk, clothing, etc.
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then apologize profusely.
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22. Pick up some dog training liquid at any pet store -- it smells like
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concentrated piss. And if you can't figure out what to do with that then
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you shouldn't be reading this.
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23. Remove contents of teacher's mailboxes. Print up everything that's
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confidential or interesting.
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24. Leave notes and hints that 'Tuesday's the day'.
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25. Impersonate parental voices and make irate phone calls to the office.
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26. Make a super stink bomb out of Hydrogen Sulfide and put somewhere in the
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ventilating system. This has cleared school buildings for days.
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27. If your school has a suspended ceiling (a ceiling composed of rectangles
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or squares resting on a frame so that the rectangles can be pushed up)
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you can put a dead fish -- or anything else -- above them. Or put it
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into empty lockers and glue them shut.
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28. Put signs on your locker saying 'this locker will self-destruct if opened
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for inspection'.
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29. Give your school library a subscription to a good underground newspaper
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from your area and insist that they make it available to students.
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30. Print up false notices frequently using the same format as the school
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uses and distribute them to the teachers' mailboxes. Eventually they'll
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never know what to believe.
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31. Make your own passes, forms, tickets, etc. or lift them out of teachers'
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desks.
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32. Need a signature? Collect things that have teachers' signatures on them.
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Paste them all down on a sheet of white paper and either xerox or print
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up a bunch of copies. Forge when useful. (When getting started you
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might put a piece of carbon paper under the signature with the carbon
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paper facing down on what you want signed. Then trace over the name with
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a steady relaxed hand. Practice makes perfect.)
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33. Do some revolutionary wall painting. All you need is a can of spray
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paint (red?) plus a little imagination and courage. Then write your
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favorite slogans on walls, sidewalks, blackboards, etc. If you are a
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perfectionist you can make a stencil, but that limits the size of what
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you can do. WEAR GLOVES or you will certainly get tell-tale paint on
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your spraying finger.
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34. Are certain teachers or administrators misbehaving? Print up a rat sheet
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with their names and telephone numbers and distribute it. Now students
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can call up at any time and reprimand them -- 3:00 AM for example. Also
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you could order them pizzas ... plumbers ... think big!
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35. Break into your school at night and burn it down. To get inside you can
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either hide in the building during the day and wait until the janitor
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leaves (know in advance what time that is), or come in later at night and
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either force your way through the door, find an open window, or break a
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window (see Monroe Mindfuck). If you use the latter method do it a few
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hours or days in advance so you don't get caught if it attracts
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attention. Be careful not to leave fingerprints -- wear gloves all the
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time if possible. Once inside make sure the walls will light well by
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placing loose paper or wood around them, or squirting lighter fluid,
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kerosene, or gasoline onto them. If a lot of burnable boxes are stacked
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in one area spread them around. Start the fire from the inside of the
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building so it will take longer before it can be seen from the windows.
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Make sure the fire has a way to travel from one burnable area to another.
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Of course you should wear dark clothes and know exactly where you are
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going when you split.
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36. Get hold of a film to be shown at a school assembly and splice in parts
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of another movie of your own choosing before the assembly. A little
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imagination on your part will make for an unforgettable day.
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37. Clog up the drains of sinks with clay then turn on the water after
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everyone leaves school.
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38. Teachers often leave gradebooks, conduct sheets, and attendance records
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unguarded. Take every chance to help yourself.
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39. Put up posters all around the school. To make them stick permanently use
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Pet evaporated milk for glue.
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40. You could ice-pick tires as a warning -- but make sure you have a total
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enemy before you put sugar in their gas tank.
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41. Start wailing in the halls.
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42. If you can't find any skunks, let chickens loose in the school ... or
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pigeons.
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43. Create the 'WEB OF THREAD' in your classroom. Have everybody in your
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class bring a spool of thread -- with extras for people who forget. Tie
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your thread onto something and pass the spools around till you run out,
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winding thread around everything. (It is best to pick on one of your
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more dullwitted teachers for this one). Expalin that you did it in the
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name of art.
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44. Carry and pretend to sell oregano rolled in papers and aspirin with the
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name filed off.
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45. Put Calcium Carbide (available in some parts of the country as 'Gopher-
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Go', also available in some hobby and joke shops) in a gelatin capsule
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and flush down a toilet or sink. Calcium Carbide reacts violently with
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water, quickly producing large amounts of HIGHLY FLAMMABLE gas and
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bursting pipes, etc. as soon as the water dissolves the capsule.
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46. Ride a bicycle down a busy hall.
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47. Save your book reports and essays. Give them to other students to use
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next year or re-use them yourself with different teachers.
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48. Play with lighting and microphone controls during 'important' assemblies.
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49. Flush things down the toilets (preferably faculty johns) like balloons
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filled with air, baseballs, M80's, huge amounts of toilet paper, etc.
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Then build an ark.
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50. Start a campaign to have the letter Z appear everywhere as the mark of
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angry students.
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51. You can short-circuit the school's wiring by taking a regular plug with a
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short cord attached. Connect the 2 wires with a switch between them.
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Plug it in, turn the switch on, and you've blown a fuse. Turn it off,
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pull it out, and try another. You don't have to use the switch, but if
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you don't sometimes the current will arc and weld the plug to the socket.
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52. Set up a fake school and hire away the lousy teachers -- or put up
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notices inviting the entire school to a going away party for a teacher
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who isn't really leaving.
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53. Read the school budget. Reprint and distribute a list of the stupid
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expenditures.
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54. Take booze to lunch in a thermos and pass it around.
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55. During some important test (SAT/ACT/etc. ) on each subject have some
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student who is good at that subject stand up and read the correct answers
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for as long as possible. When they're finished or silenced have someone
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else stand up and do the same thing. The test results will be worthless
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and it will have to be given over at great cost to the school.
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56. Take down the American flag in front of the school and put up one of your
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own. The best way to do this is to lower the flag that's already up
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replace it with your flag and cut the rope about a foot below where the
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flag is attached. Then tie a slip knot around the other end of the rope
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that is hanging down to raise the flag. At this point there is no way
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your flag can be lowered without someone climbing up the flagpole.
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57. Put alarm clocks in various lockers set on 'loudest'. Set the alarm
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clocks so they will go off about every 10 minutes then close and lock the
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lockers.
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58. Have a group of people march around the school with a flag singing the
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Star Spangled Banner. If the administration tries to punish you
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telephone your local radio stations and patriotic groups and complain
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that your school is being run by pinkos.
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59. In a class where there is a rule against chewing gum have everyone blow a
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bubble at the same time one day.
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60. Many schools have automatic sprinkler systems which go off automatically
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when sensors in the ceiling feel too much heat. Find the sensors and
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hold up a match to them.
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61. Persuade the graduating class to use their senior gift money for
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something useful or subversive.
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62. Reprint School Stoppers Textbook in your underground paper or on a
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leaflet or buy bulk copies and pass them around.
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63. Demand that all equipment being stored rather than being used be made
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available to students.
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64. If your school won't have a teacher evaluation make up some forms and do
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it yourself. Compile the result and publicize them to students, faculty,
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school board, and community.
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65. Use your 'free choice' book reports, term papers, etc. to read
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revolutionary literature and further the political education of you and
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your class.
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66. Have a student lie on the ground. When a teacher comes scream 'he
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jumped' and point to the roof or third floor window. Mumble 'Fred dared
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him' or 'Maybe it was LSD.'
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67. Make an address list of disliked adults in your school. Answer sex ads
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for them -- or order them a few gross items (C.O.D. of course).
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68. Toss handfuls of BB's on the floors of busy halls, assemblies, graduation
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ceremonies, weddings, funerals.
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69. Steal cafeteria trays or plates, burn large holes in them, and turn them
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into the school washer saying 'I guess the food did it'.
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70. Leave phony letters of resignation from teachers or administrators on the
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principal's desk.
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71. Get a small group to always carry screwdrivers and slowly dismantle the
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school.
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72. Lots of bomb scares tend to break up the boredom especially during exams
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or on beautiful days.
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73. Photograph teachers and administrators constantly -- even without film.
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74. If you've got the nerve piss in your pants while giving an oral report.
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75. Splice into your school's intercom system (from a remote hidden spot).
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Now you have your own guerilla radio station. Play on!
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76. Drop large bottles of ether in science class.
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77. Hang your teacher! Hang a hangman's noose from a tree - make a dummy and
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hang the dummy from the noose. Pin notes on it like 'Weatherbee in '73.'
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To add realism put holes in the body then let dilute ketchup trickle
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down.
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78. Newspaper stands in buildings are usually left unguarded. Take out
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papers and replace with rotten comics or papers.
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79. Put a rotten apple or stale sandwich on teacher's desk.
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80. If your school intercom has phones that connect into the intercom
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switchboard, put a small magnet either where the cord comes out of the
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handset or in the part where you hear. If the intercom just has a
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speaker, put the magnet near or on one of the electrical connections of
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the speaker. In either case it will short out the system. It may take
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weeks for them to find the trouble.
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81. Take the door of the administration offices off its hinges but leave it
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standing there so that when the principal tries to open the door in the
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morning it will have a slightly crushing effect.
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