57 lines
3.8 KiB
Plaintext
57 lines
3.8 KiB
Plaintext
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Dr. Nitemare presents...
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Volume II- On Pissing Off
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People in Cars
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_____________________________________________________________________________
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The first volume dealt with pissing off managers and store clerks in
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drug stores and grocery stores such as Walgreens and Dominick's. This volume
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takes a different route and talks about the driver and his tendencies to
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crack under pressure. In this file I will discuss the various techniques used
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by myself and companions to bring the susceptible driver to the point of
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actually leaving his car and chasing us.
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When you were little, you may have done a neat trick called the
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Alaskan Rope Trick. If you haven't heard of it the procedure is simple,
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requiring only four or more people. On a roadside without streetlights at
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night, divide the people up evenly into two groups- one goes to the other
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side of the street across from the first group and both groups get in single
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file line. A long branch is necessary to get the full potential out of this
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trick, because the branch serves as a lead to a false rope that is supposedly
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extended across the road. When a car comes in sight, both groups bend down
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as to be picking the "rope" up. On a count of three, both groups pull on
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their branch, and the car will sometimes get freaked out and hit the brakes.
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Courage is necessary here, for the now angered party will jump out of the car
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and shout obscenities. You have two choices: One, you can run like a bat out
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of hell. Two, you can stick it out and hear it all. My preference is choice
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#1 because if anyone is going to get out of the car they are usually a group
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of huge badasses that are looking for a few to kick. So why do it if it's
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dangerous? Well, the thrill of being chased has fascinated many, especially
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those who are in the mood for trouble. Try it sometime!
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For those who have done this already and know what the Alaskan is, I
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suggest a different trick. This trick has no special name, and it is similar
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to the Alaskan, except you really have a rope across. The catch is, the rope
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is attached to two garbage cans at either side of the rope, and are very much
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mobile. When a car comes by, especially one who has seen the Alaskan and
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knows its a fake, it will hit the rope, sending both cans sprawling at the
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doors, possibly damaging the car and angering the driver severely.
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This same trick works great with shopping carts, I have done this at
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a convenient shopping center with a back thru street behind it often used
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on Saturday nights. The carts are aligned in such a way so as to roll and
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smack themselves into the car. Now, you're saying that no car in the right
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mind would try to run through the rope. Sometimes, yes, but the other times,
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they still have to stop, dont they? A convenient hill above this thru street
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makes for the perfect lookout. Only now the lookout becomes a battlement.
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Several crabapple trees lie in the vicinity, and account for numerous attacks
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on drivers getting out of their cars to move the carts (or garbage cans,
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whichever). If you hit the cars, or drivers, be ready for an exciting chase.
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Now, what happens if you accidentally hit a cop car? Easy. Prevent this by
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keeping a lookout for the headlights. Cop cars usually have double headlights
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so be extra careful in deciding who to attack. A good idea is to have some
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form of cover in case you are chased (the hill above the thru street has a
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fence running along it, providing sufficient cover to hide until the guy
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gets out of his car).
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Well, that about wraps it up for now, if you can think of some more
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nasty things to pull on cars, make an addition to this file, I'd like to hear
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them. Anyway, watch for more of Dr. Nitemare's
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wierd but useful files on nothing much!
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