98 lines
5.6 KiB
Plaintext
98 lines
5.6 KiB
Plaintext
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/-----------------------------------------------------------------------------\
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| Count Lazlo Hollifeld Nibble Presents: |
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| Mister Shim(TM) - Your Briefcase-Opening Pal |
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| A Countlegger Volume Seven World Premiere Textfile |
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\-----------------------------------------------------------------------------/
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Here's a toy that will have limited use for most people now, but which might
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encourage a bit more sneakiness in the future. It's a simple device that
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allows you to quickly and silently open, with no injury to yourself or the
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target, virtually any briefcase that uses a combination lock as its sole
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security measure.
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___________________| |_ This is the kind of lock to which I refer.
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| ___ _ _ _ | | | It's used primarily on your cheaper-style
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| | | |-| |-| |-| | | | attache cases, popular among yuppies and
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| |___| |-| |-| |-| |____| | other wimpy neo-rich types -- maybe including
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|__________________________| that nerdy kid in your homeroom with the
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^^^ ^^^^^^^^^ ^^ hornrim glasses and the pencil case in his
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Slide Combo Dials Hasp shirt pocket. You never know what he might
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have hidden in there . . . like a nice HP
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calculator (which he never uses -- he extracts cube roots in his head) or his
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lunch money. Now you can find out without him knowing. Just snatch the case
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from his locker, where he keeps it during Gym period, and be sure to put it
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back before he returns. (And if you don't know how to get into his locker,
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check out the Master Lock file in PHRACK issue #1.)
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Building Mister Shim(TM)
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------------------------
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You'll need a thin piece of metal about 2cm by 3cm. (We're using metric here,
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guys. So sue me.) In the one I made I used a piece cut from an aluminum Coke
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can and it worked fine. Out of the 2cm end, cut it to look like the diagram
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below (which I wish could be less confusing . . . just look at it carefully).
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/ - - - - 12mm - - - - \
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|_______ _______| _ _
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_ | aluminum | | 2mm
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1mm| _ |____/\____ ____/\____| _ _ _ _ _ _|_
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. .. \/_ _ .._ _ . _ _ _ _ _ _ _| 1mm
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2mm wide:____::____::____::____:
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about 1.3mm wide ^^ ^^ ^^
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(To SCALE? Are you KIDDING?)
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It looks tough, but really isn't . . . use a very sharp exacto knife to cut out
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the two corners first, then a fine trangular metal file to smooth it and file
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out the small indentations. It'll take about ten to fifteen minutes if you do
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it carefully, and it does NOT have to be EXACT . . . just get it as close as
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you can. It helps to have one of those locks nearby to fine-tune the shim.
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Simply set the lock to its correct combiation and insert Mister Shim(TM) as
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described below. If it works as described, your shim is properly designed.
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Using Mister Shim(TM)
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---------------------
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The guy who designed this particular type of lock knew that he'd have to
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install some sort of "back door" in it, for all those airheads who would change
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the numbers on their locks and then forget them, or in case Random Briefcase
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Vandals assaulted the luggage store, raping, pillaging, and changing
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combinations as they went. This is that back door.
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Use is simple. Slide the modified end of Mister Shim(TM) into the gap right
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next to the dial on the lock. (Try both sides, it varies from lock to lock.)
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If Mister Shim(TM) goes in ALL THE WAY with a little jiggling, the number shown
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on the dial is correct. If not, turn to the next number and try again. On a
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three-dial lock, it will take an average of only fifteen checks to find the
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proper combination; on a two-lock case with a practiced operator, this adds up
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to LESS THAN A MINUTE to open the case.
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You can now access anything inside the case you like, or change the combination
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if you wish. (To change the combination, push the slide towards the hasp [see
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first diagram] and hold it, then turn the dials to the desired new combo. Your
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victim will have to go to someone with their own Mister Shim(TM) -- or destroy
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the lock -- if they ever want to get into their briefcase again.)
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Use Mister Shim(TM) in good health.
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_______________________________________________________________________________
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DISCLAIMER: Certain applications of Mister Shim(TM) may be illegal in some
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areas. Consult your attorney. Mister Shim(TM) is not intended for internal or
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topical use. Keep away from cuts or open sores. And remember, this is just an
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exhibition, not a competition. Please . . . no wagering.
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_____________________________________________________________________________
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/ \
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| ######### THE NoBULLSHIT GUARANTEE: Count Lazlo Nibble UN- |
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| ###### ### CONDITIONALLY GUARANTEES that this textfile is 100% |
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| ## ###_{_} ## BULLSHIT FREE. If constructed properly, the device |
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| ## / ###\_/ ## described in this file is GUARANTEED TO WORK AS |
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| ## ,(___### ## DESCRIBED, or you are welcome to visit Count Nibble |
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| ## o \ \## ## at his home and piss on his flowers. Few other |
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| ### ##### files can make such a claim -- insist on those that |
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| ######### do! (C)1986 by Count Lazlo Hollifeld Nibble/SWPG. |
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\_____________________________________________________________________________/
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