88 lines
3.4 KiB
Plaintext
88 lines
3.4 KiB
Plaintext
Electronic Terrorism by The Jolly Roger
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It starts when a big, dumb lummox rudely insults you. Being of a
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rational, intelligent disposition, you wisely choose to avoid a
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(direct) confrontation. But as he laughs in your face, you smile
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inwardly---your revenge is already planned.
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Step 1: follow your victim to his locker, car, or house. Once you
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have chosen your target site, lay low for a week or more,
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letting your anger boil.
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Step 2: in the mean time, assemble your versatile terrorist
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kit(details below.)
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Step 3: plant your kit at the designated target site on a monday
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morning between the hours of 4:00 am and 6:00 am. Include a
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calm, suggestive note that quietly hints at the possibility
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of another attack. Do not write it by hand! An example of
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an effective note:
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"don't be such a jerk, or the next one will take off your
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hand. Have a nice day."
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Notice how the calm tone instills fear. As if written by a
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homicidal psychopath.
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Step 5: choose a strategic location overlooking the target site. Try
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to position yourself in such a way that you can see his facial contortions.
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Step 6: sit back and enjoy the fireworks! Assembly of the versatile,
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economic, and effective terrorist kit #1: the parts you'll need are:
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1) 4 aa batteries
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2) 1 9-volt battery
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3) 1 spdt mini relay (radio shack)
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4) 1 rocket engine(smoke bomb or m-80)
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5) 1 solar ignitor (any hobby store)
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6) 1 9-volt battery connector
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Step 1: take the 9-volt battery and wire it through the relay's coil.
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This circuit should also include a pair of contacts that when
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separated cut off this circuit. These contacts should be held together
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by trapping them between the locker,mailbox, or car door.
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Once the door is opened, the contacts fall apart and the 9-volt circuit
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is broken, allowing the relay to fall to the closed postion
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thus closing the ignition circuit. (If all this is confusing take a
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look at the schematic below.)
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Step 2: take the 4 aa batteries and wire them in succession.
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Wire the positive terminal of one to the negative terminal of another,
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until all four are connected except one positive terminal and one negative
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terminal. Even though the four aa batteries only combine to create 6
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volts, the increase in amperage is necessary to activate the solar
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ignitor quickly and effectively.
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Step 3: take the battery pack (made in step 2) and wire one end of it
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to the relay's single pole and the other end to one prong of the solar
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ignitor. Then wire the other prong of the solar ignitor back to the open
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position on the relay.
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Step 4: using double sided carpet tape mount the kit in his locker,
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mailbox, or car door. And last, insert the solar ignitor into the
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rocket engine (smoke bomb or m-80).
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Your kit is now complete!
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---------><---------
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I (CONTACTS) I
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I I
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I - (BATTERY)
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I ---
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I I
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I (COIL) I
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------///////-------
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/-----------
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/ I
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/ I
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/ I
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(SWITCH) I I
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I I
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I --- (BATTERY)
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I - ( PACK )
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I ---
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I I
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I I
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---- -----
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I I
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*
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(SOLAR IGNITOR)
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---------Jolly Roger
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