207 lines
8.7 KiB
Plaintext
207 lines
8.7 KiB
Plaintext
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T H E B E S T A N D M O S T A D V A N C E D W A Y
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~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
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O F S T E A L I N G C D S F R O M S T O R E S
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by:
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amorphous
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`````````
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INTRODUCTION
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~~~~~~~~~~~~
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If you have read those other files on how to steal CDs and you've been
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caught, it probably didn't work because those other files are a couple
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years old. This file was written in July of 1998 just in case these
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techniques get old. This file will talk about the new and best
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techniques of stealing today. You will probably be amazed how hard it is
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to steal now, but bear with me. I thought up THE BEST WAY to steal and
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has worked several times. Enjoy.
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WHERE?
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~~~~~~
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Where do I steal from? Well, you know how the cameras are always on the
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ceiling? Well, the ceiling is probably the most important thing in a
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store. Can you tell the difference between these stores?
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(Crappy Ceiling) (Nice Ceiling)
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Staples Circuit City
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Office Max Walgreens
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Sam's Club Service Merchandise
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Computer City Spencer
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Home Depot K Mart (different stores)
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NEVER, I repeat, NEVER GO TO ANY STORES WITH LOTS OF THOSE PRETTY BLACK
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GLOBES AND SHINY TILES COMPLETELY ENGULFING THE CEILING!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
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If you do, you're stupid. Go to a store with a crappy ceiling (one with
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the security cameras pointing one way that is only in the corners of the
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building, and one smack in the middle). Once you have found a nice
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store, where a hat. You should do this to disguise yourself from the
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cameras. You do look exteremely suspicious. Look for these things:
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1) Where the CDs are
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2) Where the magazines are
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3) Where the candy bars are
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4) Where the bathroom is
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5) Where there's a place in the building with no
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cameras pointing in that direction; MAKE SURE!
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THE BATHROOM
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~~~~~~~~~~~~
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Go into the stall of the bathroom and look at the ceiling. If there is a
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vent over the stall or a tile lifted up, there's probably a camera hidden
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in there. Do you think that the owner of the store cares about how the
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men's bathroom smells? It's okay if this stuff is there. I'll get to
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it later.
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METAL DETECTORS IN WEIRD PLACES
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~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
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Make sure there is no mini metal detectors in the hallway going to the
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bathroom, or any in the doorway of the bathroom. After a couple years of
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the CD/bathroom steal trick, the employees finally caught on. Just make
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sure.
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PREPARE TO BE CAUGHT
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~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
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You must be under 18 years of age to try this technique. If you're over
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18 and are caught, you're screwed. I hope you have a computer. You know
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that kid's program that is called PAINT? It comes with your computer when
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you buy it. Well, we're going to make a fake ID on this program. Make
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four lines the size of a business card like this:
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______________
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[ ]
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[ ]
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[ ]
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[______________]
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Keep fooling around with the size of a business card and printing it up
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on your computer until you get the right size. Now go by the name, Brian
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McNeil. It's a nice name. Make up an address: 241 Salem Rd. Now, the
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way you get the telephone number is this: Pick out any telephone number
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out of your phone book. Let's say it's, (981)-438-5555 and your area
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code is 744, change the number to this: (744)-438-5555 Dial it. The
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operator recording will come on and say that the number you are calling
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is unavailable at this time. When you are caught and they search you,
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they will find the ID on you and call that number. When they ask you why
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the recording came on, tell them that your mother disconnects the phone
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while she is taking a rest.
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Now, your ID card should look like this:
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________________________________
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[ IDENTIFICATION CARD ]
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[ ]
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[ Name: Brian McNeil ]
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[ Address: 241 Salem Rd ]
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[ Phone: (744)-438-5555 ]
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[ City: Hackaguela ]
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[ State: MA ]
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[ Zip: 00109 ]
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[________________________________]
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Now get your old worn out wallet because we're gonna need it. Fill it up
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with old business cards, receipts, paper, a couple of bucks, and anything
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else that will make it look like a real wallet. Because, if you just
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have your ID in your pocket with nothing else, they will know that it's a
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fake; they're too smart.
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THINGS TO KNOW BEFORE THE TAKE
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~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
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1. Don't walk fast
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2. Don't walk slow
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3. Pretend like you don't know where any thing is
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4. Don't yawn
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5. Don't sniff
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6. Don't scratch
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7. Don't move quick
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8. DON'T LOOK AT THE WORKERS
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9. DON'T LOOK AT THE CEILING
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10.Don't wander around after taking
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WHAT TO WEAR, WHAT TO WEAR
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~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
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Get a nice, thin jacket and cut open a big slit inside on the left where
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your hip is. Sew up a pocket. I hope you know how to sew. Only the CD
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will be in this pocket. The CD case will be down the toilet, which I
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will get to later.
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IMPORTANT
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~~~~~~~~~
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COME IN AT LEAST ONE WEEK LATER FROM THE LAST TIME YOU WERE THERE.
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THE TAKE
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~~~~~~~~
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Go in and get one of those hand-held shopping baskets. Go over and look
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for the magazine that you want. Pretend like your reading the back of
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it. Now, go over to the CD that you want. Instead of grabbing the CD,
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grab the CD and the CD next to it at the same time. Slip the CD you want
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underneath the magazine and the CD you don't on top of the magazine. Now
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go into the corner of the store where no cameras are pointing and slip
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the CD in your jacket. Now go over to the bathroom and put your basket
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outside of the bathroom, around the corner, and in view of everyone. If
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you think there is a metal detector on the way to the bathroom, lift the
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bottom of the jacket over your head and walk through. Make sure the CD
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doesn't fall out!!!!!!!!!!!! When you get inside, go into the stall. If
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there is no tiles lifted up or a vent over-head, no problem. If there
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is, take your jacket off, sit down on the toilet and pretend your taking
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a dump. Put the jacket on your lap, and work with the CD underneath.
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Rip off the plastic and take the CD out. Put the CD in that special
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pocket you made. Put the plastic down the toilet. Now take the plastic
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and break it into tiny pieces. Put it down the toilet. Make sure it can
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fit through the hole. Now take the lyrics and rip them up and put those
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down the toilet. Flush. Check the CD itself for any stickers or stuff.
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The reason you want to be so careful is because now they put in mini,
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invisible magnet strip INSIDE of the plastic. Sometimes they even put a
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mini, flexible magnet strip inside of the lyrics. Now, go outside of the
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bathroom and get your basket. Go over to the candy section and get a
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candy bar. Remember that CD you got that you didn't like? Put it back
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where you found it. Now pay for everything and enjoy your CD while you
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read your magazine and eat your candy bar.
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IF YOU"RE CAUGHT
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~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
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If you're caught, they take you in a small room in the back of the store.
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They will search you for anything else until they find your wallet.
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This is what the discussion will probably sound like:
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"AHA! What have we here! When you're stealing from a store, always
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remember to leave any identification home with you. Remember that,
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Brian. Brian, who drove you here?"
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"I drove my bike down here."
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"What's your parents names?"
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"Frank and Mary."
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"Well, I'm going to call them and tell them you've been stealing from
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stores. Okay?"
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"Yep."
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(He calls your parents)
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"Why did the operator say the number is unavailable?"
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"My mom disconnects the phone when she's taking a rest."
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"Well, I guess we're gonna hafta wait for her to connect her phone back
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up."
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(10 minutes later)
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"Can I just go home and you can call my parents later?"
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"No! You're stay'n here until you mother connects the phone back! I
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could call the police in here right now! They could take you down there
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and call your mother! I don't want to stay in here! I have work I could
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be doin'! Do ya wanna go down to the police station?!? Huh?!
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"No."
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"Then keep your mouth shut if ya know what's good for ya!"
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After a while, they'll keep trying, get extremely aggrivated and probably
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let you go.
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This is the end of THE BEST AND MOST ADVANCED WAY OF STEALING CDS FROM
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STORES. Look for more of my files.
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