185 lines
8.5 KiB
Plaintext
185 lines
8.5 KiB
Plaintext
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| Beyond Zork: The Lore and Legends of Quendor |
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| A USAlliance Release |
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| Typed By: Z-Man |
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|___________________________________________________________________________|
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Within these pages is recorded certain knowledge regarding the flora,
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fauna, and locales of the kingdom. Although this wisdom has well stood the test
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of time, I would not wish to see it lost forever in the uncertain mists of the
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future. Therefore, for the enrichment of our heirs and with homage to our
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ancestors, I have writ into permanence the lore and legends of Quendor.
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-MNG
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GRUE:
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The grue is a sinister, lurking presence in the dark places of the earth. Its
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favorite diet is adventurers, but its insatiable appetite is tempered by its
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fear of light. No grue has ever been seen by the light of day; few have
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survived its fearsome jaws to tell the tale.
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DISCIPLINE CRAB:
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Discipline crabs are small moral crustaceans found in cellars, fallout shelters
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and other subterranean lairs. These brooding curmudgeons are deeply offended by
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the slightest intrusion; if cornered, they employ their razor-edged pincers with
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righteous efficiency.
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ELDRITCH VAPOR:
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Eldritch vapors dwell in cemeteries, moors and other locales where fog will hide
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their evershifting forms. Gleeful and mischievous, they enjoy snatching away
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the posessions of those foolish enough to wander into their realm. Visitors
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without possessions are themselves snatched away.
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DORNBEAST:
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Smart adventurers run the other way when they hear "Hurumph," the battle cry of
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the deadly dornbeast. Its 69 sensitive eyes can paralyze an unwary explorer
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with a single glare. Captured victims are plastered with round, sticky
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secretions that never come off.
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MONKEY GRINDER:
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Avoid this nightmare at any cost! Spawn of a carnival necromancer, the monkey
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grinder can blast minds to jelly with its powerful Sense Organ. Deceptively
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eloquent in both manner and speech, these loathsome creatures actually possess
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little intelligence, and suffer an illiteracy rate of 103%.
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IMPLEMENTOR:
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The Implementors are a race of minor deities who dwell on the Ethereal Plane of
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Atrii. Their ample free time is spent on costly luncheons where gossip and
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sweet nectars flow freely. Implementors do not discourage rumors that the world
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was created by them as a plaything.
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GIANT CORBIE:
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Corbies are carrion birds with sharp eyesight and sharper beaks. Their color
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vision is so well developed, they can spot a yellow grotch in a hayfield from
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200 bloits away. Corbies prefer the taste of dead, rotting flesh, but have been
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known to feast on live, running adventurers.
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CHRISTMAS TREE MONSTER:
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Vast herds of these luminous vegetables roam freely amid the glacial valleys of
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the south. Residents fear the autumn migrations, in which the trees cheerfully
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trample everything in their path. Christmas tree monsters are repelled by
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caterpillars, but nobody can explain why.
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MINX:
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Irresistably cuddly, the minx shares all the most ingratiating characteristics
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of kittens, koala bears and piglets. Minxes are highly prized for their ability
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to find and root out chocolate truffles from the ground, and will eagerly devour
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them if given the opportunity.
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UNICORN:
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Most unicorns have fled to the Plane of TransInfinite Splendor, where they enjoy
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a carefree existence free from the cruelty of man. The unhappy few left behind
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are eagerly sought by zoos and private collectors. It is good luck to kiss a
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unicorn's horn; but woe to any fool who harms one.
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FROON:
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Legends of this magical kingdom date back before the reign of Entharion the Wise
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(0-41 GUE). Said to lie somewhere beyond the clouds, Froon was the setting for
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a series of beloved children's books by L. Frank Fzort, and later became a
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successful movie musical starring Judy Garlic.
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HUNGUS:
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Part sheep, part hippopotamus, the hungus builds its nest in jungle swamps and
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other hot, squishy places. Normally docile and eager to avoid conflict or
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activity of any kind, the hungus is fiercely clannish, and will instantly charge
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at anything that dares to threaten its kin.
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SPENSEWEED:
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The healing virtues of this common roadside plant are well documented. Although
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it is safe to eat, spensweed is most effective when applied directly to wounds
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as a salve. Avoid the cheap commercial preparations, which may contain
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artificial coloring and preservatives.
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CHOCOLATE TRUFFLE:
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Chocolate truffles grow only between the roots of oak trees. Dark brown when
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fresh, they decompose rapidly once exposed to air. Truffles were a favorite of
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Lord Dimwit Flathead the Excessive (770-789 GUE), who ordered the excavation of
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entire forests to indulge his bottomless appetite.
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MOSS OF MAREILON:
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First classified in 843 GUE by Thwack of Mareilon, this soft, pale fungus
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thrives in underground tunnels and public toilets. When squeezed, the moss
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releases an invisible cloud of spores which improves the dexterity of laboratory
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rat-ants. Its effect on other species is uncertain.
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COMPASS ROSE:
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The stem of this rare annual always droops in the direction of the prevailing
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wind. Rumors that the compass rose can actually control the wind are hotly
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denied by the Guild of Meteorologists, who harvested the species to the brink of
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extinction in the Rose Riots of 811 GUE.
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MORGIA ROOT:
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It is a rare enchanter who does not carry morgia root to gnaw on during a long
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journey. The mint-flavored juice improves stamina, slakes thirst and conceals
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bad breath. In domestic applications, morgia root is often baked into pies, and
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makes an excellent platypus stuffing.
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CRUEL PUPPET:
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Few creatures are more dispised than the cruel puppet. It attacks by twisting
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itself into unflattering caricatures of its opponent, accompanied by jeers, rude
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noises and shocking accusations. Staunch monarchs have been reduced to tears by
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these merciless shapeshifters.
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DUST BUNNY:
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Dust bunnies burrow in obscure corners and under furniture, and defend their
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territory by multiplying. They can clog a passageway in seconds, filling the
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air with dark, suffocating particles. Static electricity and lemon-scented
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sprays are their only natural enemies.
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PHEEBOR:
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Ruins of this ancient city are still visible at the confluence of the rivers
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Phee and Bor. The reason for its downfall (circa 400 BE) is unclear, but
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minstrels sing of a feud between Pheebor and its sister city Borphee over the
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naming of what is now called the Borphee River.
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RED HERRING:
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These common fish patrol the dark recesses of freshwater pools and streams. But
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a handful of granola brings them racing to the surface, a fact known by every
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rural schoolboy. The old adage about red herrings being "good brain food" has
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no scientific basis.
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LUCKSUCKER:
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Lucksuckers feed on good fortune. Part physical entity, part mental phenomenon,
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the sucker's appearance is based on the laws of probability, and may change
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without warning. Good luck charms provide only a temporary shield against
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attack. The best strategy is to run!
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UR-GRUE:
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Ur-grues are thought to be the shades of fallen Implementors. Skilled in black
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sorcery, the ur-grue can envelop itself in a personal zone of darkness which
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neither lamp nor flame can penetrate. Sunlight is the only thing it fears. It
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is unwise even to speak of this utterly evil entity.
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THE COCONUT OF QUENDOR:
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Through reluctant to dismiss the Coconut outright, most historians regard its
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historical existence as dubious at best. Orkan of Thriff has suggested that if
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all the "Shards of The One True Coconut" and "Vials of The Blessed Milk" were
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gathered in one place, they would form a stack nine bloits highery, the ur-grue can envelop itself in a personal zone of darkness w
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