88 lines
3.4 KiB
Plaintext
88 lines
3.4 KiB
Plaintext
///\\\\////\\\\////\\\\////\\\\////\\\\////\\\\////\\\\////\\\\////\\\\////\\\
|
||
| |
|
||
| How to Kill Santa Claus Dead! |
|
||
| by The >Outland> A Neon Knights/Metal Communications Release |
|
||
| |
|
||
| Milliways 10Meg/BBS/AE/Catfur.............................(609)/921-1994 |
|
||
\\\////\\\\////\\\\\////\\\\////\\\\////\\\////\\\\////\\\\////\\\\////\\\\///
|
||
|
||
|
||
This is my second file of the christmas season, it's the thought of people
|
||
being happy and nothing that I can do to make thier day as rotten as possible.
|
||
Christmas season is great, because if you kill Santa Clause all the little kids
|
||
wont get shit gifts to open on the 24th! Look at all these dueche bags out
|
||
there dressed in those stupid red suits, wouldn't you feel satisfied by actually
|
||
killing one or all of them? I would, I personally find great personal
|
||
satisfaction in killing of as many bastards in thpse suits as possible, and
|
||
that's why I'm here... Share some personal experiences in killing of the Santa
|
||
Clauses.
|
||
|
||
Stretch a piano cord across the road between two telephone poles so when the
|
||
bastard (Saint Nick) come flying by on a sleigh or a fire engine his head will
|
||
come right off.
|
||
|
||
Obtain a hand held land to air heat seaking missile, when he comes by, nuke
|
||
the fuck to kingdome-come!
|
||
|
||
Point a .45 caliber starting pistol at his head when he's in the mall and
|
||
threaten to give him a massive vasectomy. Then fire and watch the fat shit have
|
||
a heart attack!
|
||
|
||
Put a gas burner on the bottom of your fire place.
|
||
|
||
Put a shot gun on the bottom of your fire place attacked to the handle on the
|
||
flew.
|
||
|
||
Put a lot of oil on your roof and watch the fat shit try and land!
|
||
|
||
Kick him off his sleigh in mid air.
|
||
|
||
Put an altimeter bomb in his sleigh, so when he goes high enough it's bye-bye
|
||
for the fuck.
|
||
|
||
Loosen the blades on his sleigh when he trys to land, it's Santa all over the
|
||
place.
|
||
|
||
Sacrifice his reign deer.
|
||
|
||
Bolt a rope to the roof of your house, and tie the other end to his sleigh.
|
||
It's one fucked up sleigh when he gets moving.
|
||
|
||
Run over him with a car when he lands on the road.
|
||
|
||
Fire a fat-seeking missile at his sleigh in mid air.
|
||
|
||
Have him arrested at night time for breaking and entering into your house.
|
||
|
||
When he comes down the chiminey, smash him across the face with a metal base
|
||
ball bat.
|
||
|
||
Fire a flame thrower at him when he's a-comin down the chimney.
|
||
|
||
|
||
|
||
|
||
Just remember when the old bastard comes---
|
||
|
||
"You better not pout, you better not cry, Santa Claus is coming to town."
|
||
|
||
---little does the fat shit know if he comes near my town he's gonna have the
|
||
worst night of his life, not to mention the last.
|
||
|
||
|
||
|
||
When all else fails, kill the fuck....
|
||
|
||
>Outland>
|
||
|
||
|
||
///\\\\////\\\\////\\\\////\\\\////\\\\////\\\\////\\\\////\\\\////\\\\////\\\
|
||
| Call the rest of the best--- |
|
||
| Milliways 10Meg/BBS/AE/Catfur............................(609)/921-1994 |
|
||
| Metalland I 10Meg/BBS/AE/Catfur..........................(503)/538-0761 |
|
||
| Metal Works AE Pw:Rape...................................(313)/663-8103 |
|
||
| Metal AE Pw:Kill.........................................(201)/879-6668 |
|
||
| Mordar AE 10Meg Pw:Zandar...............................(201)/528-6467 |
|
||
\\\////\\\\////\\\\////\\\\////\\\\////\\\\////\\\\////\\\\////\\\\////\\\\///
|
||
Call The Works BBS - 1600+ Textfiles! - [914]/238-8195 - 300/1200 - Always Open
|
||
|