49 lines
2.0 KiB
Plaintext
49 lines
2.0 KiB
Plaintext
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SECTARIANS ANONYMOUS
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Do you miss the feeling of being in the true vanguard of the revolutionary
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tendency?
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Do situations with no one in charge make you nervous?
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Do you secretly wish you really did have a science of history?
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Do you find yourself scouting the room for potential cadre material in casual
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social situations?
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Do you still feel more mature and disciplined than the rest of the Left?
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Do you miss that knowing feeling of superiority?
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Are your eyes always drawn to your old Party newspaper when you go to the bookstore
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or newsstand?
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Do you find yourself terrified and confused by having to make your own judgements
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about things that the Party always decided on for you?
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Do you find it hard to stop daydreaming about how well you would have carried out
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your duties in the Ministry after the Revolution?
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Do you sometimes feel that the meetings you go to now are just a little too open,
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too unpredictable, too chaotic, too relaxed--too anarchic?
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Do you still feel that you understand most people's needs better than they do
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themselves?
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Does the mention of certain seemingly meaningless, insignificant words or dates,
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like Kronstadt, Solidarity, 1956, 1968, etc., leave you feeling strangely irritable?
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Well, you're not alone. We know how difficult it is for former Leninists to adjust
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to life outside a dogmatic vanguard party. That's why we've formed a support group
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for people just like you called Sectarians Anonymous. Every time you feel yourself
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weakening in your newfound libertarianism you'll be able to call another former
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Leninist like yourself and talk over your nagging desires to submit to authority and
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dominate the cadres. Just call 1-800-YOU-OBEY and talk to someone who understands.
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----------------------------------------
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(The above originally appeared in the infamous "Shoe Polish Week," Sacred Journal of
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the Jihad of Our Lady of Perpetual Chaos. It "may be reproduced freely, giving credit
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to the source, by anyone but filthy profit-seekers.")
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