132 lines
4.3 KiB
Plaintext
132 lines
4.3 KiB
Plaintext
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The Hidden Obvious #16
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The Million Dollar Question!
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By Pip the Angry Youth
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Well, you may be asking me "What the hell is `The Million Dollar
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Question!?'" Well, The Million Dollar Question! is this:
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WHICH SODA IS BETTER, PEPSI OR COCA-COLA?
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I (out of sheer boredom) have decided that they are just as good, I
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don't mean that they are the same, but they rate about the same on my
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chart. In this issue of THO, Pepsi and Coke take the Pip Challenge.
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PEPSI
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Pros
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1) Tastes good warm
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2) Carbonation isn't overpowering
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3) Doesn't try to fool you on the 'Serving Size'
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4) No fat (but wait for the CALORIES in the cons!)
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5) Has a 1-8OO line (I'll tell you it later)
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Cons
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1) 15O CALORIES!!!
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2) No protein
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3) More additives than Coke
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5) Plastic bottle is hard to get out of fridge.
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6) NOT MADE OF 1OO% RECYCLED MATERIALS (Bad Pepsi, BAD BAD!)
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8) Will rot your teeth faster than Coke
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COCA-COLA
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Pros
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1) Really great for belching.
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2) Lower Sugar
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3) 1-8OO line
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4) Plastic bottle is easy to take out of fridge.
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Cons
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1) Strong Carbonation
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2) Smaller serving size (makes it harder to judge what's actually in
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there)
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3) 15O CALORIES!!!
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4) No protein
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5) Asks you to recycle, but doesn't do it itself.
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Another thing that I have found is that Coke has an 8 oz serving size
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and Pepsi has a 12 oz serving size, so this makes it rather hard to
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see who is better, but lucky me, I happen to have a calculator handy.
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REAL NUTRITION INFORMATION
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COKE PEPSI
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________________________________________________________
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Calories 15O 15O
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Fat Og Og
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Carbohydrates 41g 41g
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Sugars 41g 41g
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Sodium (Salt) 53g 35g
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Protein Og Og
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** ALL INFORMATION IS BASED ON A 12oz SERVING SIZE **
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** WHERE NESSESARY, I ROUNDED THE NUMBERS TO THE **
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** NEAREST GRAM **
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Well, you can clearly see that Coke and Pepsi are tied in every thing
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except for the big 'S', SALT!!! Coke has 33% more salt in it than
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Pepsi. Keep in mind tho, salt doesn't affect your blood pressure in
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any way unless you allready have a blood pressure problem. So you
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people out there be weary.
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INGREDIENTS
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Well, the ingredients of Coke and Pepsi are pretty straight forward.
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None of that Twinkie BS there. Every word in there is under 4
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syllables (sp?), the largest word there being CARBONATED. Enough
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babbling, here are the ingredients.
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COKE
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CARBONATED WATER, HIGH FRUCTCOSE CORN SYRUP AND/OR SUCROSE, CARAMEL
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COLOR, PHOSPHORIC ACID, NATRUAL FLAVORS, CAFFEINE.
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PEPSI
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CARBONATED WATER, HIGH FRUCTCOSE CORN SYRUP AND/OR SUGAR, CARAMEL
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COLOR, PHOSPHORIC ACID, CAFFEINE, CITRIC ACID, NATRUAL FLAVORS.
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Well, Pepsi has an extra acid in there, so that's why it'll rot your
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teeth alot faster. Coke tries to fool you with the word 'Sucrose' in
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its ingredients but I'm no fool. Coke also tries to fool you about
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its sodium content, on the top of the bottle right above the nutrition
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information it says "VERY LOW SODIUM" yet it has 33% more salt in it
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than Pepsi <SNIFF SNIFF, do I smell bullshit?>. None the less, I feel
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that Cranberry Juice wins the Pip challenge, 100% natural, no additives,
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and it doesn't spend anywhere near as much on advertizing. One more
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observation, if Coke wants you to recycle so badly, how come it says
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"NO REFILL" on the bottle? Jerks.
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Questions? Comments? Please call the following numbers.
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Pepsi 1-8OO-433-2652
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Coke 1-8OO-438-2653
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Asylum 1-9O8-914-9318 NUP : I LOVE FEDS
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(=--------------------------------------------------------------------=)
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Hope you enjoyed the Pip challenge. How would you like to be a
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writer for THO? Call up the Asylum or you can Email Pip the Angry
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Youth at the GODnet address of 143/143:1. Hope to hear from you.
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Peace,
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Pip the Angry Youth
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