139 lines
8.6 KiB
Plaintext
139 lines
8.6 KiB
Plaintext
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*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*
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*-* *-*
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*-* *-*
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*-* TTTTTTTTTT AAAAAA NNNN N J *-*
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*-* T A A N N N J *-*
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*-* T AAAAAAAAAA N N N J *-*
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*-* T A A N N N J J *-*
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*-* T A A N NNNN JJJJJ *-*
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*-* *-*
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*-* There Ain't No Justice *-*
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*-* #06 *-*
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*-* *-*
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*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*
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*-* Phoenix Modernz Inc. 908/830-8265 *-*
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-On the Origins of Derf-
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Derf. To some, the name inspires wonder. To others, it inspires derision. Who
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is this wonderous being, to whom subs and yea, even whole BBS's have been
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devoted? The humble beginnings can be traced to a small Commodre BBS whose name
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escapes me. But in any case, the story of Derf began there.
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One fine April day, Midnite (then Midnite Raider) came over to my place for our
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traditional Sunday AD&D fest. During a break, he called this BBS to show me
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something. It was in part the E-Mail he had received, and part the phenomenon
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which was growing. It concerned a new user calling herself Angel Baby, and
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her ex-boyfriend, Kaos Kidd.
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Kaos Kidd was, well, different. Barely literate, he nevertheless threw himself
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headfirst into the BBS world. And so did Angel Baby. The banter between them
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captured the imaginations of many... females have always been rare enough in
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the electron jungle, and this one was a hoot. She was neither a teenybopper nor
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an old maid, she was (fascinatingly enough for me) the same age as I. Being
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without a female of my own at the time, I was to say the least, intrigued.
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But this is Derf's story. Over the course of time, Derf entered the "Circle" of
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my friends. We came to know and almost like him... he had a desperate need to
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be liked. We indulged him in his wild ideas, and he us in ours. it was a fine
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time. I sold him a spare 1200 baud modem, just so he and Angel Baby could call
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my BBS (all he had was a 300 bauder, and even in 1989, I locked out the
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exceptionally slow). There was a friendly rivalry between myself and several
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other "adult" users for the affections of Kaos Kidd's exgirlfriend, and I, like
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the others, was encouraged to "take her away, if we could".
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Well, a few months went by, and something occurred that came to be called "Fred
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Meeting One". (Kaos Kidd's first name was Fred, you see). A small group of us
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congregated at KK's house to trade software, swap stories, and watch Midnite
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hack at his first Unix account. But sometime after this meeting, the
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friendships began to falter. While planning Fred meeting Two, KK decided that
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he no longer wished to be known as Fred, something which he had long used
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interchangably with his handle. So, the appelation of Derf was coined.
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It is important to mention that it was also about this time that people began
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to suspect that the woman KK had all along introduced as his sister Vicki was,
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in fact, Angel Baby. Angel Baby had described herself as being a brunette, with
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measurements sure to incite any adolescent (or post-adolescent) male to quite
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interesting thoughts. "Vicki", on the other hand, was a bit on the large size,
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and did not resemble at all the picture that she (Angel) had sent Midnite,
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which he shared for the viewing pleasure of his friends.
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I was actually the first person to discover the WHOLE truth. Angel Baby was NOT
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KK's ex-girlfriend. She was his WIFE... and she was "Vicki". By this time, I
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had been telephoning her for several months, and was quite fond of the person,
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behind the voice... the relationship which developed after that is not for THIS
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particular textfile...
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In any case, KK's relationships continued to downslide. By the time of the
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actual "Fred Meeting Two" (now more popularly called a Derf Meeting) there was
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open hostility on many sides. KK's outlandish claims grew more and more
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grandiose, culminating in its ultimate folly, the contraption known as DerfLink.
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DerfLink had its roots in a Commodre peripherial device known as RamLink, by
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Creative Micro Designs. RamLink sought to expand the Commodre RAM limits from
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512k to over 4 megs. Derf (as we all called him by now) was certain that he
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could improve on this device, and upon another CMD device (their series of
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Commodore compatable HardDrives) by using his "vast" electronical knowlege
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to allow one to connect ANY sort of hard drive to a Commodore by interfacing
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them via a Tandy controller.
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Needless to say, the vast majority of people who heard the original claims for
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"DerfLink" were highly amused. But Derf was adamant, and claimed he could do
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it. He was invited to try. Its been three years. No DerfLink yet. But the IDEA
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of DerfLink has continued to grow. DerfLink has often been cited for marvelous
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applications: one could interface a cow and a stove via DerfLink, and have
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steaks cooked to order by your computer. Several of us have threatened over the
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years to build our OWN DerfLink, complete with flashing lights, a multitude of
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wires dangling everywhere, and various household appliances sticking out at odd
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angles.
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I think Midnite said it like this:
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-------------------------------------------------------------------------
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I think Chris/Liquid Jesus, Tal, and I deserve the credit for the spread
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of Derfism. It never would have gone very far beyond a personal joke if
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the almighty (!?) Derf himself didn't make such a big deal about it. He
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regarded it as the most horrendous personal offense possible, so
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essentially he added flame to his own cremation fire.
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The usage of Derf, however, isn't solely a local phenomenon. On a BBS in
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Blacksburg, VA, there is a sub devoted entired to Derfism, with
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basically the same feelings about Derf as we have. Except, for them Derf
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is a single 'entity' (whereas here we often refer to a group of Derfs,
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or multiple individual Derlike persons [still recognizing the true
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father of Derfism however]). (The sub is called: Pertaining to ////,
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\\\\, the anti-////, or anti-\\\\. The slashes are literal, as they
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never use the sacred word save for explaining to newcomers their
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meaning.)
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--------------------------------------------------------------------------
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Derf is everywhere. Thanks to the miracle of QSD, people from all over the
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world have been accused of being Derf by myself and others. During the early
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days of the Gulf War, the Ghost, Cool One, and myself tormented some poor,
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pro-Saddam Palestinian kid with cries of "Thou Art Derf!" for over four hours.
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I have seen Derf being referred to on boards in Kansas, Germany, Japan, and
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Switzerland. I've even heard the occasional non-computer-person use Derf to
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refer to someone.
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For those of you wishing to learn even MORE about Derf, his wife Angel Baby
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continues to run a BBS to this day. (July, 1992) Give it a call and commune
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with the almighty Derf in person! Derf is usually there in the evenings, and
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more than willing to chat about his life and the future of DerfLink to anyone
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who is willing to listen. Call Angel's lair at 908-269-7810
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This concludes this mostly pointless issue of TANJ. I can be contacted
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anywhere, really!
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*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*
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*-* Phoenix Modernz Inc. TANSTAAFL BBS:908/830-TANJ *-*
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*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*
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*-* Modern Textfiles Inc. The Matrix BBS:908/905-6691 *-*
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*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*
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*-* The Lawless Society Inc. The Syndicate BBS:908/506-6651 *-*
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