95 lines
4.8 KiB
Plaintext
95 lines
4.8 KiB
Plaintext
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PPiC-PPiC-PPiC-PPiC-PPiC-PPiC-PPiC-PPiC-PPiC-PPiC-PPiC-PPiC-PPiC-PPiC-PPiC
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PPiC-PPiC-PPiC-PPiC-PPiC-PPiC-PPiC-PPiC-PPiC-PPiC-PPiC-PPiC-PPiC-PPiC-PPiC
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PPiC-PPiC _____ _____ ______ _____ PPiC-PPiC
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PPiC-PPiC / _ /\ / _ /\ /_ __/\ / ___/\ PPiC-PPiC
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PPiC-PPiC / ___/ // ___/ /_\/ /\_\// /\__\/ PPiC-PPiC
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PPiC-PPiC /_/\__\//_/\__\//_____/\ /____/\ PPiC-PPiC
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PPiC-PPiC \_\/ \_\/ \_____\/ \____\/ PPiC-PPiC
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PPiC-PPiC PPiC-PPiC
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PPiC-PPiC-PPiC-PPiC-PPiC-PPiC-PPiC-PPiC-PPiC-PPiC-PPiC-PPiC-PPiC-PPiC-PPiC
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PPiC-PPiC-PPiC-PPiC-PPiC-PPiC-PPiC-PPiC-PPiC-PPiC-PPiC-PPiC-PPiC-PPiC-PPiC
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Presents
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So You Wanna Be Kewl
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This file is dedicated to Nikki. Call her up at 616-962-7438. Ask for
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Nikki, and tell her you heard she gives great head.
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So you wanna be kewl? Well, there are several kinds of kewl. There is:
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1) Stoner cool - This is for all the stoners (No Name, Scourge). First, you
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must know what a stoner does. A stoner does not fuk every chick he
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sees, and he does NOT sing "We Are the World" and hold hands. To be
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a good stoner, you must have a good supply of all the homemade recipes
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(available at your local stoner board (29A)), if you don't have them,
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you aren't Shit Outta Luck yet, you just gotta wait until I put all t
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his stuff in a future issue. Then, he has to do at LEAST all the
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medium shit (hash, LSD). He also has to have the Stoner's Guide to the
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Galaxy (for only 19.95. Dial 1-616-962-7438, and ask for a good stoner.
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2) Preppy Cool - This is for all the preps (Ground Zero). A prep has to be
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a total asshole. For some reason, people look up to total assholes.
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You also have to play basketball, and a sport every season with
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absolutely no break. You also have to walk like a hood, dress like
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a wigga, and stick your tongue out and jump real high. These people
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are the "ELiTE" cool, the ultimate in Coolness.
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You need our guide to being an elite. Order "The Ultimate
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Conformist Bastard" today!
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1-616-962-7438. (Boy, this guy has EVERYTHING!) Tell them
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you want to become an asshole.
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3) WaRezZZ KeWLNiZ - THiS iZ F0R aLL THe Pe0PLe WH0 WaNNa HaCK, F0uND oN
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PR0DiGy aND oTHeR K-RaD PLaCeZ. (Overkill) THeY aLSo aRe eXpeRTz at
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WaCKiNG oFF WiTH HouSeHoLD eQuiPMeNT, aND uSuaLLy aRe BaRNey FaNzzZ.
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0rDeR "My LiTTLe Pee-Wee" T0Day!
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FR0M ThE MaN wHoZe FaST WiTH THaT HaND, NiKKi!
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aT - (6i6)-96TWo-743aTe
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4) Larvae cool - So You Wanna Be A Complete And Total Loser? (Robert Gray)
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Then this is for you! How to be a complete and total lamer. Cool
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sayings range from "No Im not a fed." to "Me? A lamer? Oh yeah?
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What's PBX stand for?" They are also notorious for hanging out on
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800 Amiga BBSes (Psycho Labs ][) and pissing off sting boards who
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are still looking for the LoD. They are ALSO notorious for being
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non-cool. The only kind of cool where you really aren't cool, you
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are just pretending to be cool so your "ph"riends will think you are
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cool and let you on their cool boards which really aren't cool they
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are just pretending to be cool and they even do real imaginative
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things like reuuning one line off a screen and getting everyone pissed
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as hell because they don't have a PgOver key... You want to be cool?
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Call 1-616-962-7438 and tell Nick that you want to have access to the
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"Hacker's Underground BBS". Be sure to tell him you aren't a fed!!!
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Now that you know the kinds of cool, you have to pick which one.
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Personally, I'm hoping you'll pick either Stoner or Preppy, cause then
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you get the great fucks. Stoners get better fucks, preppies think they
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are fucking and end up coming after the 1st 20 seconds... so preppy
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girls think they aren't virgins but in reality they haven't even had
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their cherries popped. What the fuk do you expect? Preps' dicks are
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about 1" long...
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WANTED: Good fucks. I live in Butt-fucking Egypt and there aren't any left.
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----
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You wanna write for PPiC? Get PPiC App from one of these great BBSes-
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29A
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616-781-1177
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!Home Base!
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The Crime Scene
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516-YoU-WiSH
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PPiC Distrib Site
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Ministry of Death
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516-askmel8rIforget
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(C)opright --==<3D> Phose Inc. <20>==-- 1994 All Rights reserved.
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PHOSE and PHREE are trademarks of PHOSE international and PHOSE incorperated.
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Blah blah blah and a bunch of other small print shit.
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